The Insatiable Heart
by yuugiri
Summary: If they knew that living life in peace could be so difficult, perhaps they would have wanted to remain in war. Chapter 44 finally up.
1. Phase 1

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Seed. =)**_

Floating in space. This was what he could remember since he first closed his eyes. Floating aimlessly in that vacuum, not really knowing what will happen next. All he knew was that he was floating...

_Floating..._

Kira Yamato opened his brown eyes and groaned inwardly, feeling every muscle in his body crying out in pain. How long has it been, since he had closely escaped the Genesis from completely disintegrating what was left of the Freedom Gundam. He tried to breathe but it hurt every time he took in the remaining oxygen in his gear. _Was this how it felt like before you die? _

He blinked a couple of times, trying to focus his vision on the small, round object floating inches from his face, inside his helmet. A moment later did he realize it was a ring. _Lacus._

He could not help but smile. The small gesture brought jolts of pain to his skull, but he smiled anyway. There were many things to smile about that very moment. The war was over, he was sure of it, and he was still alive to enjoy the fact about it, though he really was not expecting how long he would last. Another reason to be happy is the fact that the last thought he would be thinking about is Lacus' face, her smile, and how she creased her brow before he left to embark on this last mission, and her words: _Come back to me._

He would so love to come back to her. She would nurse him back to health; anything she touched would all return back to health. And not once did he wonder what she felt about him. Maybe, just maybe, her cold façade of being the Commander of the rebel faction would not apply to him if he returns. _If I return._

He closed his eyes, feeling his heart's slow beating. This was probably the end of him. He knew it. He was even beginning to hear voices. He heard Cagalli call out to him, then Athrun, and then, he even heard his pet, Birdie, cry out in the distance.

_This is probably what you hear when you're dying. The voices of the people who matter to you._

"Kira! Kira! Wake up! Are you okay?" Again, Cagalli's voice amid a silent humming of p very beat-up mobile suit.

"Kira, open your eyes" This time, Athrun's voice.

Kira opened his eyes, slowly and painfully and thought his heart would explode at what he saw. A dilapidated Strike Rouge was gliding towards him, the cockpit open, exposing the two people in it. Cagalli was piloting it and Athrun was right beside her, already ready to come to his aid the moment they were near enough. He was about to call out when a very hyperactive green bird perched on his chest, and squawked. "_Birdie!_"

"Thank God, you're alive, Kira," Cagallii said as she let the mobile suit slowly stop beside him. Athrun went to him in a hurry, floating a bit to his side. "I thought you were a goner. I thought _I_ was a goner. I blew up the Justice to stop the Genesis from firing, but I guess we were just lucky. It fired anyway, huh?"

Kira nodded, once again pain shooting out to his brain, causing colorful stars to dance in front of his face. "La Cruse was in the way, so I guess we really were lucky." His voice sounded do detached, like it didn't belong to him at all. He needed a glass of water. "What happened to everyone?"

"That's what I want to know, too. We should get back to the Archangel. You look wasted." Athrun slipped hi s arm under his and grunted. "I really thought we wee done for."

"So did I, Athrun. So did I. But right now, I'm just glad we're alive. Please, take me to Lacus' ship... I need to... keep a promise... that I'll come back to her..." He closed his eyes as he let his friend take him away into the Strike Rouge.

"Is he okay?" he faintly heard Cagalli ask.

"Probably. Let him rest. He's probably... " Athrun's voice faded, and he couldn't hear the rest of what he was saying. He was succumbing into a deep sleep.


	2. Phase 2

**_Hah! This is my chapter two again! Reposted loophole free! (Of course until someone points more out. Whehehehe!) It really isn't different from the first chapter two, but I did a few major adjustments... So I suggest you reread it again. Thanks and enjoy!_**

**_Disclaimer: Nope, I don't own Gundam Seed! Heck I couldn't even get their names straightened out!_**

_** June 23 A. W. 12:02 am **_

Lacus Clyne turned the page of the small, thin, paperback book she was reading. The book really had caught her interest. It was a story entitled "Three Little Pigs". It was actually a funny story. But what was even funnier was that she, a sixteen year old girl, took her that long to actually read a bedtime story she should have read when she was three.

The former songstress yawned and rubbed her eyes drowsily. She turned to the digital clock on the side table and frowned. She didn't know it was already this late...

The stirring on the bed next to her overstuffed loveseat made her smile. She got up from the seat and put down the book face down, making sure to mark her page. It was starting to get to the good part. That wolf sure was making her nervous. Walking on tiptoe on the carpeted floor, she peered into the bundle in the middle of the mattress and sighed.

Kira was sleeping soundly like a baby, eyes closed and lashes flickering, his chest falling and rising with each breath.

She giggled as the Gundam Pilot snorted in his sleep and shifted a bit, rolling on his back. The movement he himself made seemed to have caused him a bit of discomfort, because he grunted in pain and opened his brown eyes, which appeared to be a little wild and quite unfocused. He blinked a couple of times, then realized that someone was peering down at him.

Lacus grinned at him, her eyes closing in the process. "Good morning."

It took Kira a moment before he recognized her. When he finally did, his lips broke into a smile. "Am I in heaven?"

Lacus blinked in amazement. For a moment there, Kira actually sounded like he was trying to sweet talk her. "No, Kira. We are in the Archangel infirmary on the way back to Earth. Are you feeling all right? Does anything hurt?"

The pilot started to shake his head, stopped, then winced. "My head hurts..."

"I kind of figured that out. You have been asleep for over eight hours. Perhaps you would like to eat? A glass of water perhaps?"

Kira's eyes widened at the mention of the latter. "Water..."

Lacus reached out to the side table and took the tall glass of water with a straw. She helped Kira sit up and watched as he sipped the water thirstily. When he was done, she took the glass from him and set it on the floor, then assisted him in lying back down and sat herself on the chair once again. They were silent for a while, until Lacus broke it. "The war is over, Kira. It's finally over."

"Yeah. It is."

"That's a good thing. I feel kind of uneasy, though."

Slowly, Kira turned his head to face her. He had that usual blank expression on his face. He really needed to smile more... "Why are you feeling uneasy? It's over. We should celebrate."

Lacus laughed, scratching her head roughly. "I think I'm experiencing what they could call the post-rebellion leader blues."

"Huh?"

"I don't know what to do with myself now, now that we have nothing to worry about anymore."

Kira stared at her for a second too long, then he smiled. "Hmmm. I suppose you're right. I wonder what will happen next, when we reach Earth. What about you? What would you do first?"

Lacus nodded. "I want to walk on the beach. And look for an apartment."

"An apartment?" Kira sat up from bed and a moment later, groaned, cowering with is arms over his head in pain.

Lacus forced him back down on the bed and laughed. "Don't strain yourself, Mr. Yamato. You need more rest. And yes, I will need a place to stay."

"You mean you're staying on Earth?"

"I have no choice. I think it's the guilt kicking in. Since the Earth forces had gotten the raw end of the deal here, Andy and I, including everyone on the Eternal had agreed to escort the Archangel and the Kusanagi back home. Besides, I don't think the Eternal could make it back to PLANT in its state. So I guess I'm stuck with you on Earth. What remains of the Clyne Faction will proceed back to PLANT and yes, probably the other ZAFT soldiers who remain standing. Isn't it funny? That all of this, all the destruction and killings and deaths would have been avoided if people just listened?"

"I suppose. Ironically, to achieve peace, there should be a war." Kira started to rub his temple with his thumb. Lacus could see the stress and the fatigue in his face. He looked like a sixteen year old, but somehow, he "felt" older... He exhaled sharply. "How are the others?"

The former songstress found herself choosing her words carefully. She was not expecting Kira to be asking such questions at this early a time, and it frightened her, that being a person who was usually very good with diplomacy, was at a loss for words. "Everyone is okay. Athrun and Cagalli were here earlier, but since they really didn't suffer much injury, the medic released them just a few hours ago. They wanted me to tell you they said hello and that you should take it easy."

A ghost of a smile once again appeared in his oh so solemn face. "That's nice. And the rest?"

Lacus bit her lip before she proceeded, as she knew Kira needed to know the truth. She decided that he was going to find out eventually, so she might as well tell him now. "The Coordinators who do not need medical treatment have been boarded to the remaining Clyne Faction Ships and have been sent on their merry way back to PLANT. Majority of ZAFT have been gathering their numbers – or at least what's left of them – as some are helping out the Earth forces with boarding the rest of the survivors to the Kusanagi. Yzak, for one, was here on board to ask for a bit of supplies that will last those on the Clyne Faction Ships until they reach their destination. Of course, we weren't able to give so much because we need them for our trip back to Earth Your friends are all safe and are temporarily asked to lend a hand off the bridge with the casualties."

"And?"

"Captain Murrue Ramius was temporarily relieved of her position for the trip back to Earth. She is in the Captain's Quarters."

"Why?"

"She could not stop crying."

With this, they fell into an awkward silence. Lacus folded her hands on her lap and shook her head. "It was a tragic death. Had it not been for Mwu La Fllaga, the Archangel and everyone in it could have been obliterated."

She saw Kira close his eyes in resignation. He stayed like that for a few minutes and then opened his eyes again. "He was an honorable man."

"Captain Ramius is terribly depressed..."

"I could understand. Somehow, even if she didn't say anything, she really cared for him."

Lacus sadly looked down at him, wringing her fingers together uncomfortably, her eyes shifting from one place to another. "It really was a tragic death"

Kira gazed up at her with an unreadable expression, then when he seemed to have noticed she wasn't saying anything, he reached out, grabbed her hand and said, "Sit by me, please."

Lacus was startled a bit, looking from Kira to her hand enveloped in his. A little puzzled, she got up from where she was sitting and sank down on the bed next to him, making the mattress groan under their weight. "What do you need, Kira?"

With this, Kira shook his head, pulled her closer and rested his head on her lap, wrapping her arm around his neck. "You."

Lacus felt her face heat up into an uncharacteristic blush. "Kira?"

"I'm back, Lacus. I came back to you. I kept my promise."

Lacus laughed. Sometimes, Kira was just another teenager. No one would have thought that he was the pilot of one of the mobile suits earlier. Now he just looked like everyone else; normal. "I am grateful that you did. I never doubted you. So I wasn't surprised when you were brought in. Kira? _Kira?_"

Lacus peered down at the boy on her lap, and blinked a couple of times in bewilderment. Kira Yamato, the pilot of the Freedom Gundam, who had barely escaped death for the chance that others might live, was sound asleep, peacefully and silently snoring, his head cradled in the songstress' arms.

Just before she could turn away, she noticed something twined in Kira's middle finger of the hand that held hers. Something sparkly and quite cold to the touch. Leaning over she saw what it was.

The ring that I gave you... 

At that, Lacus could swear then and there that he was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen in this universe. Reaching out to the chair, she plucked the book she was reading and resumed her slow but steady pace on finding out about the life of the three little pigs.

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Miriallia Haww backed away from the door of the infirmary as she saw Kira pull Lacus to sit next to him on the bed. She wanted to visit her friend before going back to the bridge, but saw that he was currently preoccupied. Taking a step back, she was taken by surprise when she ended up colliding into something which, by all means, she knew should not be there in the middle of the hall. She almost lost her balance, and would have ended sprawled on the floor had it not been for two strong hands that supported her upper arms. Regaining her footing, she whirled around and gasped as the face of none other than the coordinator Dearka Elthman zoomed into view. He had a sizeable amount of blood trickling down his arm and the left side of his forehead. He looked like he was run down by a mobile suit while crossing the street.

"What are you doing here all bloody? You should have had that treated hours ago," Miriallia said timidly, pretending she didn't care when in reality, she did. Stepping aside, she turned her eyes away from him. He had such a penetrating gaze. When he didn't say anything, she started to get uncomfortable. "What?"

Dearka shook his bloody head, his blond locks waving about, finally diverting his eyes away from her face. "Nothing. I had to help in the repairs in the boosters first. Else we would be stranded here. I decided to prioritize." He smiled rather uncertainly. He was always uncertain when it came to her. "Is the medic in?"

She shook her head, looking down at the floor. "No. Kira and Lacus are in there, alone."

Dearka's hand flew to his arm and sighed. "Guess that means I have to bleed out here and wait for the doctor to arrive, then..."

"Don't tell me you've been bleeding for over six hours?" Miriallia blinked and set her eyes on his tan face, looking at him under her lashes. After a moment, Dearka returned her stare and it was her turn to look away. "Come with me. I'll tend to your injury."

She started down the hall slowly, and after a while she heard the pilot's footsteps follow behind her. After a silent pilgrimage through the hall, they finally reached the quarters and she let the beat up pilot in first. "Sit."

Dearka looked around to see where he could land. There really weren't any chairs and so he settled for the only place he could sit; the bed.

Miriallia knelt down on the foot of the bunk and pulled out a small first aid kit, then after retrieving what she needed, she sat down next to him and nestled the kit on her lap. She furnished a wad of cotton with a bit of alcohol for disinfecting and turned to her patient. "Be still."

Dearka frowned. "I haven't even moved yet."

She narrowed her eyes at him, then, perhaps out of spite, she pressed the cotton on the wound on his forehead. "Take this."

Dearka winced in agony, biting down on his lower lip obviously to hold back a scream.

Miriallia finished with the wound and strapped a bandage around his head. "Take off your shirt."

Dearka stared at her weirdly. "So is this conversation going to revolve around short phrases? Sit. Be still. Take this. Can't we talk about something else?" He pulled his shirt over his head and extended his wounded arm out to her.

It was her turn to stare now. Dearka actually wants to start a conversation? She busied herself with the wound but asked anyway. "What do you want to talk about?"

"Nothing. Everything. I don't know. Whatever."

Miriallia flash him a brief glance then shrugged. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm all right. You?"

"I'm okay."

Silence.

Dearka tried again. "So, uh, now that the war is over, what are you planning to do?"

She started to bandage his arm slowly, making sure it was tight and firm. "Me?"

"Yeah."

"I want to live. You?"

Dearka paused, looking down at her in a way he never did before. "Me, too."

And again they were silent.

Once again, the Buster pilot gave it his third shot. "So. I'm going back to Earth with you."

This made Miriallia pause. She had been so busy over everything that has happened that it was only then did the facts drew into her. Dearka was still in the Archangel. She rounded on him, eyes wide with shock. "What _are_ you doing here? Those ships bound for PLANT left hours ago."

The pilot grimaced. It was then did Miriallia notice she had pulled too tight on the bandages. She quickly stopped pulling, mumbling an incoherent apology to him.

Dearka shrugged. "Why shouldn't I be here?"

"Why are you?"

"I don't know. I just assumed that I would be needed here more than there." He paused, looking away and then continuing. "If you want me to leave... you know... I guess I can still catch up with the Buster..."

Miriallia shook her head ruefully. "Your Mobile Suit can't catch up to anything right at the moment."

Dearka was surprised. "Why?"

"Because I say so." Miriallia finished the bandage, then eyed him with a weary look. "You can stay, Dearka. I don't mind."

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_**Okay! So how is it? Tried to patch up all the loopholes I've created, and I even did a little research. Hehehehe! Sure made me feel like an ass for all those inconsistencies. But I'll try better from now on. Please Read and Review my story.**_

**_And Shadowcell, thanks for the wakeup call. I just hope next time... well, you'd be a little nicer when you give reviews. You said that we have to do research before we embark on fanfiction. I do not believe this. If it weren't out of spite, I would have just let all those inconsistencies stay. Because this is after all FANFICTION. Heck! You'd see Cinderella stories out of Lupin III here! But since I respect you as a Gundam Fan, I followed your advice. And genuinely, thank you. I look forward for more of your advice in the future. Oh, and by the way. That MAHQ site was THE BEST!!! _**


	3. Phase 3

_**Author's Note: Hahaha! Reposted again! Nothing much changed here either. Just patching things up for someone who just completely saved my ass from being humiliated with my mistakes. =)**_

_**Please bear with me. I know the story is a little slow, and the plot is a little unclear. Basically this story is about how these sixteen year olds who have been so used to life fighting a war will live their lives normally. This will revolve around their first year after the war. The plot will clear itself up eventually when they reach Earth. I know it sucks a bit but please, please R and R!!! **_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed. =) **_

_** June 23 A. W. 3:02 am **_

****Cagalli Yula Attha gritted her teeth in annoyance as she floated down the anti-gravity hallway of the Kusanagi. She had just gotten off the transport pod from the Archangel, since the infirmary in the Kusanagi was allotted for treating most of the wounded Coordinators. Except for Athrun, Dearka and Yzac, who were asked to report to the Archangel for treatment, everyone who could not be accommodated in their ship was brought to them.

The moment she had stepped into the bridge, the face of the most withered-looking man she had ever seen popped into view on the monitor. The man had introduced himself as Burin Dellit, a messenger the Earth Alliance had asked to deliver the message to the remaining ships deployed in space of the plan of their return. The Earth Alliance was welcoming back its heroes, or so he says, and so the ships were granted passage to the only country in Asia that wasn't at all directly destroyed in the war.

"I congratulate you for your great success, Princess Cagalli. You have done your father proud," Dellit said in a voice that was anything but happy.

Cagalli had snapped at him then. "What do you mean success? This was a war, old man. No one was victorious. Countless lives have been lost because you old guys wouldn't listen. And the last time I checked, you guys were barreling us down with cannons because we had a different cause."

The man merely brushed the comment away, a little embarrassed. "Well, yes, but that was an incident which arose from a purely different circumstance." And with this, he told them that the Earth Alliance Base in Hokkaido, Japan has volunteered to grant their three ships passage and was glad to accommodate the survivors, be they Coordinator or Natural. Since Japan was probably the only country that had not suffered too great casualties from the aftershock of the destruction of Ptolemaeus EA base on the moon, whose debris have caused quite a ruckus to majority of the parts of North and South America, Cagalli found it sensible enough that they settle there for the time being.

That was another thing she had to fret for. Particles from the moon are hovering about the earth's atmosphere... She wondered what the long term effect of it to Earth would be...

But Cagalli still wasn't done yet. She had slammed her fist on the control panel and made her voice as hateful as possible.

_**(A/N: The next is the exact words my advisor said, **_

_**though made to suit Cagalli in her dialogue.)**_

"This 'Earth-Alliance-welcomes-back-its-heroes' thing, it's not working for me. Many of the Clyne Faction's members were ZAFT deserters, Coordinators therefore. Many more came from Orb, my home, which you have just gotten through demolishing. And basically, the people on the Archangel deserted the Earth Alliance. At best, the only thing they could get is a discharge. At worse, they would court-martial everyone they could get their hands on. Lastly, it was the Clyne Faction that stopped the Nuke-en-masse assault on the PLANTs. The Earth Alliance certainly wouldn't want to see them again in any capacity other than in chains. And now you're telling me you're _welcoming us back?_ "

The old man had fidgeted more. "Princess Cagalli, please understand that this is a different matter, now that everyone's head is clear of misguided intentions and – ahem! – forgive me for saying, idiotic decisions, I assume everything will go well. As for the arguments you have raised to me about the Factions that participated in the ordeal, I do not see any reason why the Earth Alliance would court-martial the people on the Archangel, not after that we have achieved our goal, which is peace. Had it not been for them, and of course the Clyne Faction that stopped the nukes from hitting PLANT, I believe that the Bloody Valentine Incident would have repeated itself and the war would not have ended like this at all. How could the EA think of anything else of you than honor you for stopping them from creating what would have been the biggest mistake humanity could have ever created?"

That was when Cagalli started to think. She tried to assess everything that happened. Come to think of it, this war got out of hand because of stupid, greedy leaders of groups that wished nothing more than to blow each other up. She thought of La Cruse, who thought he was better than everyone else, and so he crazily wanted everyone dead. He was definitely a catalyst on why everything got waaaaay out of hand.

Then of course, there was Azrael, who was too insecure of his existence that he wanted to obliterate ALL of the Coordinators to kingdom come. If it weren't for his twisted belief that the war would end if the Coordinators were wiped out clean off this universe, many lives would have been spared.

_Like Mwu's._

Let's not forget, Athrun's father, Patrick Zala. Basically the Coordinator counterpart of that loon, Azrael. Cagalli personally hated him. She had tried to think of ways how such a vile creature could actually be related to Athrun at all. He had been the one who thought about that brilliant idea to take out the big guns – the GENESIS – and blow up the entire world so they would emerge victorious, whether or not his son died in the process. He was just a hateful man.

Yes, she knew that there was nothing more to worry about, now that the weeds were finally taken out by the roots. She knew that perhaps, had sane men been the leaders put to decide on the ZAFT and the EA sides, none of these would have happened.

Thoughts of the destruction of Orb flashed through her mind as she continued aimlessly drifting down to the infirmary to lend whatever help she could give, when she saw Athrun standing at the end of the hall, staring at something on the ceiling, oblivious of his surroundings. She had left him in her quarters, telling him that he should stay and catch a few winks. She knew he was tired.

So seeing him there in the hall, alone, made her wonder what he was doing there at three in the morning.

She saw him suddenly become aware someone was approaching – his reflexes were really sharp – his face stiffened as if ready to pounce, but when he recognized it was just Cagalli, he smiled, waved and met her halfway.

Athrun spread his arms wide as if to envelop her into his arms, but Cagalli had something else in mind. Ducking his hug, she grabbed him by the wrist and twisted his arm painfully from behind. "What are you doing here out of bed?" she demanded playfully.

Athrun pretended to be scared. "I-I'm sorry ma'am. I'm sorry for having disobeyed your orders that I should get some rest." Then, impressing on her how really strong he was, he grabbed her from her shoulder with his free arm and threw her over his head with one pull. The lack of gravity caused Cagalli to float up towards the ceiling with a strangled gasp, but Athrun pulled her by the arm and instantly wrapped her in a warm embrace. "But you see, I missed you too much so I had to go look for you," he continued in a whisper, nuzzling his face into her neck.

Cagalli tried to struggle free, but when she saw he wasn't planning on letting her go, she returned the embrace. "I have good news."

"What?" He asked, his face still buried in her neck.

"Japan Earth Alliance Extension granted us passage for everyone. Be it Natural or Coordinator."

"So what?" He muffled again, not moving an inch, his warm breath still against her neck.

Cagalli socked him in the ribs. He grunted but did not move. "What do you mean 'so what?' Athrun, this means we have a place to stay until we know where to put everyone else. Until I haven't organized the reconstruction of Orb, and possibly Heliopolis, everyone in these three ships is homeless. Someone offered us a temporary home. You should be glad. After all, you're the one who insisted to stay with me on Earth instead of returning to PLANT."

The Justice pilot laughed silently.

Cagalli punched him in the ribs again. "Why are you laughing?"

At this, he pushed her at arms length, scanned her auburn eyes with his blue black ones and smiled his reserved smile. "Because to me, it doesn't matter. I don't care even if I have to float in space forever and ever, so long as you're there beside me."

Cagalli felt herself blushing. She knew how Athrun loved sweet words, always making sure he made her feel warm and cozy inside, yet Cagalli felt anything but. Normally, she knew girls would kill for a guy like Athrun Zala.

_Who wouldn't? He's handsome, caring, sweet, witty. I could go on and on, _she thought to herself as she examined his face intently. While other girls would think of her as lucky, she would always find it hard to react every time he did the perfect-guy thing. She would either be too embarrassed to return the act, like for example, a hug, and so she pretended like she didn't want it, whereas she knew in her heart of hearts she would give anything to stay in his embrace forever.

That was her biggest problem. She didn't know how to reciprocate.

Athrun gave her a little shake, realizing she had fallen into a silence he didn't know the cause of. "Hey, are you okay? I was only kidding around, Cagalli. I think it's great that we get to stay in Japan. I haven't been there myself. The EA extension is in Hokkaido, right? I read in a book somewhere that it's pretty lovely there. And cold."

Cagalli shook herself out of her thoughts and nodded at the practicality of what he just said. "This is the first time in my life I get to enjoy Earth. It's a beautiful planet. I'm glad that everything is over."

Athrun ginned his boyish grin. "Actually, I'm glad that things are just beginning." He was being romantic again, Cagalli knew as she caught herself looking away uncomfortably. She really was not used to this.

As if he read her thoughts, Athrun let go of her shoulders and awkwardly stuffed them in his pant pocket. "Cagalli? Don't you like it when I talk that way?"

"What? Talk how?" She asked, startled at his question. She unconsciously bit her thumb between her teeth nervously, trying to hide that feeling of a deer caught the in headlights of a car.

"Like how I talk to you. I don't know. Or when I hug you, or... " his voice trailed off, as if he didn't know what else to say. "I'll stop if you feel uncomfortable..."

"No!" Cagalli shouted. The moment the syllable escaped her mouth did she start to feel like a complete moron. _Great. Now he must think I'm too eager for affection. _She tried to compose herself. Clearing her throat, she started over. "I'm sorry, Athrun. To tell you honestly, I... uhm... how do I say this without looking like a slut? I _appreciate _the affection you give me. But sometimes... uhm... I get a little uhm, what's the word? Oh, yeah! _Overwhelmed_ because I'm not really used to it. So I end up pretending like I'm not affected, but I am, and you might think I'm not interested but... well... you know..." She scratched her hear ruefully. "Does that make any sense?"

Athrun stared at her for a few moments without saying anything that it frightened Cagalli that she might have offended his pride. After all, he knew how these things work; he had been engaged before. She, on the other had, had no memory whatsoever of what constituted of a potential love life. A couple more seconds, Athrun nodded. "I understand, then. I guess I didn't really even think of how you must feel." He turned around and Cagalli thought that he was going to float away down the hall away from her. She felt her possible chances at love get flushed down the toilet because she, Cagalli Yula Attha, was being a stick in the mud.

She made a mental note to kick herself later seventy seven times, and was even planning on how to do it when Athrun whirled around, a solemn look on his face. But she knew he was trying to hold back a smile. She was startled when Athrun extended his hand to her and said, "Then I won't _overwhelm _my princess Cagalli. I'll take it really slow." Then he winked. Winked! Athrun Zala winked! "So that you'll catch up really quick."

Cagalli stared from him to his hand and smiled. She took his hand and laughed softly. "You're funny."

"Am I?"

Cagalli nodded as they continued down the hall, hand in hand. "But I want you to know that I'm really grateful."

"For what?"

"That it is really just beginning." She gripped his arm firmly, pulled him down and gave him a soft kiss on the cheek. "And I get to enjoy the beginning with you."

Athrun seemed to glow at the sweet gesture she initiated. A little surprised and a bit pleased. He smiled a small smile then. "Where are you off to?"

"The infirmary. We're running short on the manpower here. Some men were dispatched earlier to help with the repairs in the brig. So I decided to leave the bridge to Kisaka for now. After all, we don't need that much people in the bridge. It's smooth sailing from here onwards."

They reached the infirmary after a while. The room was fairly large, but awfully crowded. The casualties weren't really that bad, but there were numerous people to be treated. Majority of them were Coordinators, but there were some Naturals here and there. Cagalli felt her eyes widen at the sight of the person she saw running around from one patient to another. She knew she had seen him before. Athrun confirmed his identity.

"Yzac?" The Justice pilot gasped in disbelief as they entered the room, the automatic sliding doors closing behind them.

Yzac Jule raised his eyes to the couple and immediately lowered them. Cagalli saw him hide behind his back a first aid kit and a roll of bandages. "Athrun. I didn't know you were here."

Athrun was still stunned. "You, too. I didn't know you had stayed. How are you?"

Yzac seemed a little surprised by the diplomatic question. "Me? I'm all right. Wasn't hurt badly, so I'm helping out."

Cagalli looked around from patient to patient and laughed.

This made Yzac uncomfortable. He tried to hide behind his white-blue hair. "What?"

Cagalli tried to make him relax. "I was headed here to help out." She grinned at him. "But it seems like you've already done the job for me. Thank you."

At this, the Coordinator's face reddened. "I didn't do nothing."

"Really? It looked like something to me."

Athrun looked down at her. "Your work here is done, Cagalli. Where shall we go next?"

At that, she heard a loud rumbling, gurgling sound. Yzac's face turned to an unearthly shade of red.

Cagalli smiled. So did Athrun.

"Let's go to the cafeteria and grab a bite."

She knew that this was not the beginning of a good relationship with this ZAFT soldier. But at least it was _a_ beginning. That was what's important. They will be staying on Earth after all, in the same country, in the same island as they were. They had to make it work somehow, though she still didn't understand why he had stayed here to help out instead of just returning back to his home.

But right now, as she looked at Athrun and this Yzac person, she once again questioned what the heck they had been fighting for. The Coordinators, the Naturals, what made them different? They all bleed alike. They get hungry. They laugh and they feel sorrow.

Suddenly, she remembered all the people who had to offer their lives to achieve this peace.

_Did it really have to take that much people to prove that Naturals and Coordinators all are alike, because we cry when we feel grief, which is exactly what we feel now?_

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_** June 24 A. W. 6:00 am **_

Kira watched from his bed as Cagalli scratched her blond head of hair as she looked out the window of the Archangel infirmary. She had been awfully uneasy since she came in to visit him. They were already soaring over the Southern Part of the Land of the Rising Sun. Miriallia, who had visited him just last night to bring him his supper had told him of the great news that they were welcome to stay in Hokkaido for the time being until necessary plans were brought out. Sai, who had taken charge of the bridge while Captain Ramius was presently unable to hold her position, had announced that the ETA was approximately two hours. Cagalli had entered the room about half an hour ago, but until now, she never said anything to him.

So Kira decided to break the silence. "Cagalli?"

With this, she jumped, startled at his sudden sound, but she still didn't say anything. She continued on staring out into the window.

"Cagalli? What time did you board the Archangel? I heard from Lacus yesterday night before she went back to the Eternal that you were in the Kusanagi. How come you're here? And where is Athrun?"

The young princess of Orb took a while before answering, but when she did, it caught Kira off-guard. "Kira. I had always wanted to ask you, but it didn't seem the right time then, with the war and the fighting and all that. But now... I've been thinking. We have our whole lives ahead of us now. Sometimes I even ask myself if this is really happening, and the reality is just so hard to get used to." She turned to face him, but once again fell silent.

Kira cleared his throat. "You're gonna ask something?"

Cagalli nodded. "Kira, you really are my brother, aren't you?"

Kira felt his heart stop beating for a split second. The reality of what La Cruse had said then suddenly came back to haunt him. Of what he was. What he is. It felt weird, having the time to actually contemplate on it. He found the sudden abundance of time quite nerve-wracking. Now that he didn't even need to fight in a mobile suit just to stay alive, what was he to do now? How do you normally spend your life in a world that was already at peace? But right now, as he stared at Cagalli, he somehow felt at ease. This spunky girl right in front of him was the living proof that he is more than just a lab specimen. This girl right in front of him was in fact a _part_ of him. And that was the reality he couldn't help but smile at. He nodded at her. "Yes, Cagalli. I am your brother."

Cagalli tilted her head to the side. "If so, who's older? You or me?"

Kira blinked. He had never really considered this question before though. "I don't know. Aren't we supposed to be twins?"

"I don't know. Maybe. Whatever. " She turned to the window again. Then she answered the question he asked earlier. "I used a transport pod before we entered the Earth's atmosphere last night. Athrun stayed behind the Kusanagi to help in the bridge. I wanted to land on Earth with you. You're my only family now, Kira. You and me. We're a family."

It had never occurred to Kira that it mattered to him that he had someone he knew was a part of him. But now that Cagalli mentioned it, it did feel good to know that you had someone.

She went on talking. It seems like she had gotten over her silent bout after finally getting the question about their relationship out of the way. "Are you scared?"

"Of what?"

"Starting life."

"I suppose I'm a little nervous. I've gotten so used to waking up in a battle ship. I keep on asking myself what it would be like. How about you?"

"I'm a little excited. And yeah, nervous. We get to start our lives with a different routine. Say, maybe we could go out for some ice cream. I heard that it's almost summer in Hokkaido."

The very simplistic way she had invited him to go out for ice cream made him aware of the drastic change they really are about to undergo. They will be able to take hot baths instead of cold showers. No more dry jerky for lunch. They may be able to cook their own food. It was remarkable, the comfort this fact brought him. They will actually live in the security that no bombs would be falling on their heads anytime to catch them unaware.

Kira smiled. "Ice cream would be nice."

_And maybe a walk on the beach. After looking for an apartment._

Lacus' cheery face forced itself into his mind's eye. Yes, there will be more time for Lacus. More time for the usual things young people do, like go out and enjoy their youth.

The automatic sliding door buzzed open and admitted at very flustered Miriallia and a very happy looking Kazui. This was the first time he had seen Kazui in a while. Miriallia had said he had been working in the engine room with the others. Not that he knew anything to contribute the mechanics. They really didn't need the extra pairs of hand on the bridge so others were assigned to the other sectors of the Archangel.

At the sight of the two, Cagalli turned from the window and came closer to the bed. "Hello there."

"Hi, Cagalli. How are you doing, Kira?" Kazui greeted. He was very perky. Kira could remember he a nervous wreck every time they entered a battle. The change was astonishing. Gone were the days when he would almost pee in his pants when they detect enemy ships coming closer.

"Hello, Kazui. I'm feeling better. Hello, Milly." Kira shifted in his bed and smiled. "How is Sai? I haven't seen him yet."

Miriallia laughed. "Sai has never left the bridge once after the explosion of the Genesis. We had to bring his food there or else we were afraid he wouldn't make it back to earth alive. He said he was enjoying his last moments in the Archangel, since we won't be using it anytime in the near future."

Cagalli frowned. "Sai is alone on the bridge?"

With this, Miriallia blushed. "Uhm, Dearka volunteered to take my place in the bridge. Just for a little while, he said, so that I could visit you."

"Captain Murrue didn't say anything about ZAFT substitutes," Cagalli teased.

Miriallia laughed shyly.

Kazui pretended to make nothing of it, when in fact he was making a lot out of it. "That Dearka sure is really nice. At first I thought he was a bad guy. Rude and all. He sure is extra nice to Milly."

Miriallia's blush deepened. "Stop it, Kazui," she said silently, but still a small smile playing on her lips.

"Yeah, well, it's true. Damn. How come you guys get to return home with boyfriends and girlfriends while I'm still single."

It was then Cagalli's turn to blush.

Kira was slightly amused. "And who are we referring to, actually?"

"You and Lacus Clyne. Cagalli and Athrun Zala. Milly and - "

This time, Miriallia was not pleased. "I said stop it, Kazui!" With a smack on the over-perky boy, she flashed an apologetic smile at Kira and stormed out of the room, the door closing automatically after her.

The three were dumbfounded for a while, then Kazui started hitting his head with his balled up fist. "That was stupid of me. I shouldn't have teased her that way. I'll go apologize. See you later guys." And with this, Kazui hurried away, disappearing out of the door where Miriallia left.

Cagalli was every bit as sad. "Oh, right. Her boyfriend, Tolle died in the war." Her hand flew to her neck. "Oh, no... It was Athrun who... "

Kira tried to brush away the negative feelings that were trying to overcome him at the memory of his friend, Tolle's death. Athrun had killed Tolle in return for him killing Nicol. It was a viscous cycle, war. Again, Kira felt grateful it was over.

Cagalli bit her lip nervously. "Kira? Do you think I should apologize to her?"

"Why? You didn't kill Tolle."

"I know, but..."

Kira shook his head. Feeling slightly responsible for Miriallia's grief – he was the one who had started the cycle after all – he tried to explain. "Listen to me, Cagalli. These wounds in our hearts left by the pain of war, they will leave scars. No matter how hard we try to forget, they will always be there to haunt us. But it is up to us if we try to point fingers on who is at fault or not. Because in this game of war, we are all at fault and we are partly to blame, because we tried to play it. Milly will grieve, but she will learn from it. She's up to a good start by having forgiven. So don't try to point her finger on anyone by trying to apologize to her on something none of us could have helped. It was a battle we all had to fight. Okay?"

Cagalli looked over at him in disbelief.

Kira stared back at her questioningly. "What?"

She smiled. "For a moment there, you actually sounded older than me."

Kira smiled smugly. "Perhaps I am."

Cagalli didn't like that. "There is no way you're older than me."

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Well thanks for the reviews again, guys. Whew! Really screwed up big time, but I think that pretty much covers it. Now for the fun part! The next chapter, they finally reach Earth!!!! Yay!!!!

_**Oh, and about Kazui, I know he ditched the crew but since I need more character interactions, he just had to be there. AND I DON'T CARE IF ANYONE OF YOU THINKS HE SHOULDN"T BE THERE!!! =) He wasn't very useful in the series, so I might as well use him now. =) wehehehehehe! **_


	4. Phase 4: Strawberries and Milk

**_Hello! I've reposted my chapter two and three and I would still like to know if you'd still want me to continue regardless of how pathetically ignorant I am and for mixing up the names of the dead and the living... Oh, well... Well, thanks for the reviews anyway. I just had to redeem myself... =) still smiling!!!_**

_**And this chapter is for Lomiothiel, who really took the time to help me with this fic. So this chapter is full of Dearka/Milly fluff!!! Just for her!**_

_**Oh, which reminds me... if the EA really are going to court martial them all, don't you think that the Ending of Gundam Seed would have been a bad one? **_

_**NOOOO! I will not have it that they get anything less than a medal! This is MY FANFIC!!! I say they get honors!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!**_

_**Oo' I'm going crazy! Snicker! Snicker!**_

_**June 25 A. W.**_

Dearka scratched his head gingerly as he watched the flickering monitor in the bridge with prickling discomfort. His scalp was starting to itch because of the bandage and the dry blood. He blinked in rapid succession, trying to focus his eyes on the morning news. He had not been truly aware of the things that had happened on Earth while they were in space. And now that he was going to live in it, he might as well catch up.

Of course, it was hard not to expect anything to happen after the explosion of Ptolemaeus base. That was one whopper of a weapon, that GENESIS. Heck, it was capable of eliminating life on Earth! With that direct hit from the big gun, no wonder that side of the moon got totaled. Billions of particles had spread over the atmosphere directly above North and South America, so says the anchorman, except of course, some parts of Asia. However, the Buster pilot was quite doubtful that those would not eventually spread over Japan sooner or later...

Dearka watched the rerun of the aftereffect of the explosion of the EA base. He saw the sudden darkening of the skies in those parts of the world and he found himself creating a hypothesis on what will happen next.

_It'll be awfully cold in those parts... Yeah, with the sun not being able to penetrate through all that in space... _Leaning his itchy head back on the chair he was sitting on in the Archangel Bridge, he let his thought wander elsewhere. Everywhere. It didn't matter. So long as it wasn't about _her_. That had been his problem since the cease fire. Since his mind was not preoccupied by anything other than his awfully annoying scalp, he couldn't think of anything else. Everything, every single thought, led to Miriallia.

_Miriallia..._

He wasn't fully aware he was staring aimlessly up the Bridge ceiling. Until now, he still wanted to know why he had stayed around. Darned it all, he could have easily just gone home, relaxed and probably wouldn't be haunted by these ever so unfamiliar feelings for Miriallia.

"Miriallia..." he breathed.

The guy with the glasses. - What's his name? Sai? – looked over at him with a strange look. He started to wonder why he was staring, until he realized why.

_Dammit! I said her name out loud!_

Sai gave him a small smile and returned his gaze back on the monitor. He, too, appeared to be watching the news. "Yeah, Milly. She's a swell girl. Really sweet. A little too passive, if you ask me. But she's really fine. And you said so yourself, when you first got here. She's pretty cute."

Dearka gave a start, sputtering his words, sitting upright on his chair. "So what?"

At this, the guy laughed. "Nothing. I just thought you might want to know." He rubbed his nose with the back of his hand and nodded. "You like her, don't you?"

"Why are you asking me this? I don't even know why you're talking to me."

Sai looked to his left, then to his right. "We're the only ones here. Why shouldn't we talk?"

Dearka frowned, turning away. "What makes you think I like her?"

"I don't know. I think it's how you say her name. Miriallia, and never Milly, you know? Anyway, I think she really likes you, too."

With this, he felt his face heat up in an unexpected blush. "She hates me. She can't stand being around me at all. She's just, I don't know, being polite when she's around me."

"Nah, I think she likes you." The guy turned to him with an odd glint in his eyes. "Don't tell her I told you this. She'll kill me." Snickering and cupping his mouth with his hands, he continued in a whisper. "She had the signal on your Buster on all the time when you go out to battle. She was worried stiff for you when the signal was cut off on you when you and Mwu disappeared."

Dearka felt his face get warmer. He unconsciously started scratching his head again. "Are you doing this on purpose to make me uncomfortable? Or are you just trying to amuse yourself until we land?"

Sai was about to say something else when the double doors automatically slid open and admitted a fuming Miriallia followed by a miserable-looking, dark-haired fellow he remembered by the name of Kazui. Dearka found himself springing to his feet along with Sai at the sight of the girl they had just been talking about. This was probably out of guilt. Sai knew that he shouldn't have said anything about her.

"I'm really sorry, Milly." Kazui said.

Miriallia took her original seat on the Bridge and turned a furious set of fiery eyes at Kazui. Her tone, however, was a complete contrast of her face. "It's all right, Kazui. Now please leave me alone."

Feeling totally helpless, Kazui pleaded with his eyes at Sai, as if asking for a bit of backup. Sai shrugged his shoulders helplessly, then turned to Dearka, who in turn diverted his eyes from everyone else. But when he heard a lot of scuttling going on, he turned around and started to panic when he saw the two, Kazui and Sai, slowly tiptoeing out of the door. When they saw they had been caught in their attempt to escape and abandon him with a furious Miriallia, they let out a squeak and rushed out of the bridge. The door opened and closed even before he could utter a protest.

_Great. This is just wonderful... _he thought to himself as his scalp began to itch again. Scratching vigorously, he tried to gaze at her in the corner of his eyes. He swallowed hard when he saw she was staring at him. He turned around and faced her awkwardly. "Uhm... Hello."

Her stare made him feel like a specimen in a jar.

When he didn't say anything, he decided to start a conversation. "So. How is Kira?"

She still didn't stop staring at him but at least she replied. "He's well. A little weak, but he looks like he's very happy. And relaxed." Finally, she turned those ever so serious eyes on the monitor, which was showing a family of ducks crossing the freeway.

They were once again engulfed in a moment of silence.

Dearka frowned. _Now what do I do? Should I leave? No. If I leave, she'll be all alone here. But now what will I do if I stayed?_

He jumped when she spoke first.

"How are you feeling, Dearka?"

He didn't know what it was that started deep down in his gut. Maybe it was the way he said his name. He could not remember her saying his name like that before. It was the first time he addressed him in that tone. And however he tried to deny it, he somehow liked it.

"I'm fine. My head is itchy. I think I need a shower. But that's fine, I guess."

What Miriallia did surprised him. She giggled. "Your head is itchy?"

Dearka didn't know how he should take her reaction. "Well, yeah. I think it's the bandages or something. Not that I'm complaining on your bandages or anything. But maybe it's the hardened blood. I don't know but I think – What? Why are you laughing?"

Miriallia was laughing softly, her eyes closed. "How funny. And you need a shower, you say?"

"Yeah. What's wrong with that?" he asked defensively, feeling slightly offended. She was laughing at him. But why?

With this, she stood from her seat and went to the door. "If you take a shower, your wound will only bleed more."

"Yeah, well I kind of though of that. That's why I didn't take a shower."

The truth was, the reason why he didn't want to take a shower was because Miriallia had bandaged him and he kind of wanted to have her work on for a little while longer.

"But," she continued. "If we wash it on the right place, it'll do you good."

Dearka gulped. _We?_

He shook his head. "That's okay. If we leave, there wouldn't be anyone left on the Bridge."

Miriallia smirked. "Kazui and Sai will man the battle stations for now."

"They're not here."

Miriallia flourished her had out and slammed her fist on the button to the door. In one moment the door was closed, the next, it slid open fast and a very startled Sai came stumbling in, screaming followed by a staggering Kazui who fell on the former's sprawled body on the floor. "You see, my friends have a tendency to eavesdrop. But since they're here, they will be happy to take their shift ahead of schedule." She peered down the busted fellows and grinned menacingly. "Right guys?"

Both nodded their head in agreement, laughing without mirth.

"Come with me." Miriallia instructed, stepping out of the bridge.

With barely a glance at the fallen two, he hurriedly followed her out the door and into the hall.

"Where are we going?"

"The showers."

"But the men's showers are in the other way."

"That's because we're not going to the men's showers."

"What?! Don't tell me - "

"Women's showers are cleaner. I will not step into your shower rooms."

"Wait a minute. You're coming with me _inside the shower?_"

Miriallia flashed him a bored look. "Do you want your head to stop itching or not?"

Dearka shuffled along beside her uncomfortably. "I do, but - "

"Besides, who knows. You might end up scratching your wound and you'd start bleeding again."

Deciding that what she said was true, he shut up. He didn't know what the heck she was planning, but whatever it was, he didn't know whether or not he liked it.

Moments later, they were in the women's shower room. It didn't look any different from the men's except that it was indeed cleaner and there those little fluffy pink puffs on the metal hangers on the wall that he assumed were used by the girls to scrub their bodies.

Dearka was hating this. What if someone stepped into the showers and saw he was there? Man, he knew he was going to get it.

Miriallia proceeded with ease across the tiled aluminum floor and grabbed a pink towel from one of the hangers. She then disappeared in the far corner of the room and reappeared with a tube of something in her hands.

Dearka suddenly became awfully nervous. "What are you gonna do?"

"I never thought I get to say this to a guy, but I'm going to wash your hair."

"What?! You can't wash my hair when I'm in my clothes."

Miriallia stared at him with a deadpanned expression. "Are you proposing you'd take off your clothes?"

Dearka felt all the blood rush to his face. "_**NO**!_"

"Then what?"

He fell in silent fury.

Miriallia took advantage of his silence. "This is what we're going to do. You see that small bench there?"

Dearka turned to look at what she was referring to. At the edge of the wall, near a faucet was a low, narrow wooden bench. He started to see her plan. The bench was low enough that if he were to lie down on it, his head of hair would be directly under the faucet. With this, he didn't have to take his clothes off.

Miriallia didn't waste her time. In a matter of minutes, she had had him lying on his back. She was standing over his right side and was looking around as if searching for something. After a moment, she gave up and turned down to him. "Do you mind if I just put this tube of shampoo and towel on you?"

Dearka shook his head. "I don't mind."

She placed the shampoo and the annoyingly pink towel on his chest. After a while, she went to the head of the bench and was starting to remove the bandages. Her hands were remarkably light. Dearka stared straight ahead to look at her. She was intently concentrating on the removal of those bloody bandages. Dearka reached up to scratch his head, which started to get itchy all over again, but she swatted it away.

"Ow, it itches," he muttered his explanation.

She didn't say anything. Dearka looked up at her again. Upside-down to his point of view, she had a serious look on her face. He realized he loved watching her work.

"There we go," she exclaimed as she succeeded in removing everything. She left his sight and he took advantage of this to scratch his head. When he heard her approaching, he stopped.

Miriallia turned on the faucet and he felt a cool river of water trickling over his scalp. One of her hands was running through his hair, the other one reaching for the tube of shampoo. She got it, her fingers brushing his chest so lightly. It was surprising, how his whole body could be so aware of the slightest contact with her.

Suddenly, his senses were filled by this unfamiliarly sweet scent that reminded him of strawberries and milk. "What is that thing?"

Miriallia looked down at him a brief second then continued with her business. Dearka felt her hands massaging his scalp, but was ever so carefully avoiding the part of his head wound. Moments later, she had started with a thick lather. "What? This? It's my shampoo. You don't like it?"

"No. I think it's... sweet."

"It's my favorite shampoo."

Dearka's head was suddenly invaded with thoughts of smelling Miriallia's hair. He beat the evil thought out of submission and kicked it out of the recesses of his mind before the next chain of thought invaded him of Miriallia taking a shower.

She really massaged well. He could feel his eyes closing in pleasure as she continued to thoroughly lather his blond hair. He could get used to this. But just when he was starting to get really comfortable, a fairly huge amount of water splashed his face. Startled, he shot up from where he was lying on and gasped as a bit of the water entered his nose. "What the - !"

Miriallia blinked, then after a while, got the towel that had fallen on the floor when he got up, and threw it over his head. "Sorry. My hand slipped."

Dearka sniffed noisily and murmured a curse under his breath but shook his head anyway. "It's okay." He rubbed the towel against his hair to dry it up.

She sighed then said, "Well, just dry up and I'll wait for you outside. Okay?" Before she could take the second step away, one of her feet unceremoniously stepped on the remaining suds of the lather. One moment, she was standing, the next she was fighting for her balance.

"Whoa!" Dearka stood up from the bench in a hurry to assist her. But because of the towel on his head, he didn't see more of the suds on the floor. He, too, started to slip. Trying to regain footing, he reached out for Miriallia's hand. Bad idea. She panicked and the next moment, both of them were off their feet with a loud scream from Miriallia. They ended up sprawled on the wet floor, Dearka on his back, Miriallia on top of him, their clothes soaking up the soapy water, the pink fluffy towel thrown on their heads.

Just then, they heard footsteps rushing to the showers. Dearka tried to get up with his arm but ended up slipping even more.

After a moment, Cagalli's blond head popped through the door, her eyes wide with worry. "Hello? Milly? I heard you scream. Are you all right? What's - "

Then she fell silent with a strangled gasp. Dearka threw the towel off of his head and saw what had made her fall silent. Their position there on the floor, with Miriallia's head resting on his chest in shock, her legs on either side of his torso in a way he didn't know if he liked or not. To an outside observer, they could easily be mistaken for a couple who were being really naughty in the showers.

Miriallia recovered soon enough and when she did, she was off of him in a heartbeat, leaping away with a small yelp.

Cagalli rushed in, worriedly kneeling by Miriallia. "Are you two okay? What were you two doing?"

"NOTHING!" both of them yelled defensively.

Cagalli wasn't buying it. A suspicious glint entered her narrowing eyes. "Nothing, huh? Sure looked like something."

Miriallia tried to protest.

Dearka was nervous. This was a bad position they were in. He hoped to God that Cagalli didn't think he was making aggressive advances on her.

The next remark from the princess from Orb made him sigh out of relief.

"Normally, I would think Dearka was pressing himself on you, Milly, but I don't know... _You _were on top of _him_."

Miriallia's face turned an unearthly shade of red. "What's that supposed to mean?"

And the two girls started to argue lightly, in a way Dearka thought was the way girls poked fun at each other. He couldn't help but smile at how this was turning out to be. He decided that he will never forget this day ever.

And he had this Strawberry and Milk shampoo scent on his wounded, not-itchy-anymore head to make sure of that.

_**Author's note: Thanks to all those who read and review my fic, however bad it started. And thanks for trying to make me feel better. Anyway, I hope that's the end of my ordeal. Please read my reposted chapter 2 and 3. I tried to make it better. =)**_


	5. Phase 5: Yzak's Point of View

**_Disclaimer: Nope, I don't own Gundam Seed_**

Yzak had never really paid much attention to Earth History, but as far as he could remember, Japan, ever since World War II, had sworn to never directly participate in a war. He did not know what this country had contributed to the latest one, but if his memory serves him right, them being there seemed to make perfect sense.

Making his way down the Kusanagi, he felt an unexplainable pleasure greet him as a soft breeze played with his light blue hair. For some weird reason, he could "sense" the peace, even with the knowledge that this was an EA base.

Unlike the Naturals that disembarked from the Kusanagi, he, along with a handful of Coordinators, were not wheeling around luggage with them. When his feet touch the pavement of the airstrip, he felt quite uneasy.

He watched as more people poured out of the Archangel and the Eternal which had landed on either side of the Kusanagi. Automatically, his eyes searched for Dearka. He had herd he was on the Archangel. Now with the group of people suddenly starting to crowd around him, he felt completely out of place. He began to wonder why the hell he even stuck around in the first place.

He jumped when a hand suddenly clamped on his shoulder from behind. It was Athrun. Right. He had stayed on board the Kusanagi and had let Cagalli have a bit of private time with Kira.

"You all right?" Athrun asked, pushing him to the side as that huge fellow with long dark hair who came by the name of Kisaka came down from the ship.

Yzak unintentionally fiddled with his collar, just for an excuse to get Athrun to remove his hand on him. "I'm fine. Do you need anything?"

"Nothing. I just saw you and I thought you needed someone to talk to."

Yzak stiffened. "You're wrong. I don't need anyone to talk to right now."

Athrun, for some weird reason, smiled. Yzak noticed how the Justice pilot seemed to be different somehow. He looked... young. Relaxed. "Well, many will want to talk to you, though. And unfortunately, you don't have a good enough reason to bail out of a conversation."

He decided that the blue-black haired pilot was right, but he didn't want to admit it, so he changed the subject. "What now?"

Athrun nodded to Kisaka, who had his broad back at them. "I don't know what they're planning, but I heard that he, Andy and Captain Ramius are the only ones who are asked audience with the EA authority here."

Yzak frowned. "Why them?"

"Why not?"

"I can understand Ramius. She's the captain of the Archangel. But shouldn't it be that Cagalli be the one representing the Kusanagi and Lacus Clyne, the Eternal?"

Athrun shook his head. "I don't know the whole story, but I think they don't want us to get involved."

"Us? Involved in what?"

Just when Athrun was supposed to say something, a furious Cagalli came stalking from the crowd gathered at the foot of the Archangel. My, was she scary. The fond look Athrun gave her made Yzak's eyes widen in disbelief.

The princess of Orb, however, did not turn to either of them, nor did she return Athrun's smile, but instead made a beeline for Kisaka.

"I leave the Kusanagi for a few hours and already I'm hearing things I'm not liking," Cagalli snapped crisply, rounding on the broad fellow, skipping any preamble whatsoever. She propped her hands on her hips. She made it clear she was really pissed. "Why on earth do you get to meet with the EA authority here without me? You're up to something. I demand you tell me."

Yzak blinked in amusement. He could tell Athrun had feelings for the girl, but the question was, what did he ever see in her? Sure, she was cute and all, maybe if you stuff her in a dress... but she was so... prickly...

Kisaka, who was probably used to waves of uncontrolled emotion – specifically anger – from the little miss, simply smiled down at her, hands sliding themselves in his pockets. "No need to get mad at me, Cagalli. It's really nothing important. Me, Murrue and Andy will handle them. It's just a brief word of welcome. They'll probably just annoy you anyway. You know how you are when it comes to, uh, how have you termed it before? Ah, yes. _Boring old farts._"

Yzak held back a chortle.

Cagalli was not convinced. "What are you up to? You're hiding something..."

Sighing in resignation, Kisaka placed a hand on her shoulder and tried to explain. "Cagalli, haven't you noticed? Look around you. See the people who have returned from the war. Look at yourself. You're barely sixteen. Kira, Athrun, Lacus and the others are hardly any older. You were forced to grow up too fast. But now that it can be helped, we – me, Andy and Murrue – have decided to give you what you've been missing out for far too long."

"And what's that?"

"Your life."

It was then did it dawn to Yzak that, yeah, he was just sixteen years old. Man, he could hardly even remember his childhood. It felt kind of sad, that he learned how to ride a mobile suit but he never got to ride a bike... Oddly, he caught himself listening for more of their conversation.

Cagalli was stubborn. "I don't know what you're talking about, Kisaka."

This time, the man held her at arm's length, searching her face, as if willing her to understand by his gaze. "You know perfectly well what I'm talking about, Cagalli. Be free. Have fun. Go out for some ice cream. Maybe some karaoke. I don't know what you young ones do nowadays, but you'll figure it out. Do the things you weren't able to do."

Cagalli was livid. "Like what?"

"Like mourn for your father."

Yzak blinked. _Oh, that's right_... _Cagalli's father died..._

Athrun sidestepped him and went slowly to Cagalli's side, taking her from Kisaka's grip. "Cagalli, you know I will always support you in whatever you think is right." He rolled his eyes. "Because I know you'll probably strong-arm me into it if I don't, but right now, I agree with Kisaka's argument. Whatever they will talk about, surely, it wouldn't concern you, or me. Because we've done what we were supposed to do. Now it's the EA's turn. Let the grown-ups discuss the subsequent agenda of the truce."

Once again, Yzak was bewildered. Athrun had said _grown-ups_. The reality of how young they really were once again weighed down on him.

_I'm only sixteen... and I've never ridden a bike before..._

"Now you go on ahead. A shuttle bus will take you to the front of the base. You will be met by Burin Dellit. You remember him, right Cagalli? He will take care of all of you. We will be going on a separate shuttle bus but we will see you soon. Don't worry. Everything will be fine." Kisaka straightened and ruffled the head of the now silent Cagalli. It was in that moment did Yzak realize that the little princess was calm when Athrun was around. Perhaps, she wasn't that scary at all, so long as Athrun was near.

Cagalli nodded, leaning into the Justice pilot's chest. "All right, Kisaka."

Kisaka's face brightened as he saw five square buses roll towards them "Oh, here's your ride." He turned to Athrun and whispered quite loudly. "Take care of her. She's a very spoiled girl."

Cagalli narrowed her eyes at him. "I can hear you, you know."

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Luckily, Yzak ended up in the same shuttle bus as Dearka. Along with them were Cagalli, Athrun of course, Kira, who looked well enough but was still supported by Lacus, that girl with the very complicated name, Miriallia, a guy with glasses he was never really acquainted to, and another one he also didn't know but he heard from glasses-boy that he was Kazui. Along with these familiar people came others he really didn't bother looking at. They were not really important to him, and if anything, were just making it hard for him to reach his friend.

Squeezing through the throng of people in the bus, we finally managed to reach him, only to find out he wanted to get away from him. He was radiating this sickly sweet smell of something that reminded him of an overripe strawberry. But since he was not the kind of guy who never felt comfortable with wasted effort, he decided to stay. Wrinkling his nose, he socked his friend on the shoulder in greeting.

Dearka was happy to see him. "Hey there. I was wondering where you were."

Yzak was normally not this rude, but he was starting to feel dizzy with the smell. "Is it just me, or is your hair emitting an aroma that resembles that of a strawberry milkshake?"

With this, he saw four heads turn to their direction, specifically Kira's, Lacus', Athrun's and Cagalli's, the latter having an odd look on her face.

Dearka's already tan face darkened in an unmistakable blush. "Bug off, Yzak."

Yzak saw that Mirialli, who wasn't that far away, tried to hide her face behind Kira's shoulder. Lacus, who was next to him turned to her in her usual wide-eyed innocent look. Just then, a pink metal ball flew out of the former songstress' hand and began to scream _"Shampoo!"_ in an annoyingly high pitched electronic voice.

"Haro!" Lacus called.

Yzak hid a smile. Lacus had a toy along with her.

Miriallia immediately snatched the ball away with a yelp.

Kira was left in anagrams. "What's wrong, Milly?"

Cagalli, however, was very amused. She happily raised her hand to attract attention. "I know!!!"

Miriallia clutched the princess' arm pleadingly. "Cagalli, you like cake, don't you? Chocolate cake? Chocolate cake is good for you, you know."

Cagalli was a little bit uncertain. "I love cake."

Miriallia nodded, "I thought as much. You'll have one from me if you _keep quiet._"

Cagalli still was not convinced though. She seemed to be really hard to bargain with. Yzak knew she was hiding something. The princess turned to Dearka. "You know, Dearka. I like ice cream float, too."

Dearka blinked but grumbled an incoherent, "Fine. You'll have your float."

Now Yzak knew they were hiding something, Miriallia and Dearka. It was really amusing to see watch them squirm like this.

Athrun was stumped. He turned to the very sly Cagalli. "I'm lost. What happened in the Archangel that I don't know of?"

When Cagalli wouldn't say, Athrun turned to Kira. "Do you know anything of this?"

"Not me. I was in bed majority of the time. Ask her." Kira pointed to Cagalli. "She went out for a walk around the ship when I fell asleep."

But Cagalli just wouldn't say.

Yzak scratched his head, annoyed. "Whatever. You just smell funny."

Dearka didn't like that. "Well, it's not your hair, and I happen to like strawberry. I think it smells good."

Trying to patch everything together, Yzak was having really strong suspicions that his his friend had been using Miriallia's shampoo. But since he saw Dearka was already having a hard time from everyone else, he decided to drop it and instead changed the subject. "How's it going?"

Dearka shot him a grateful look. "Everything's fine. I'm surprised you stayed. Why?"

In reality, he had asked himself the same questions over and over for the last hours they were onboard. He tried to turn the facts around and around in his head, but he still had the same answer.

"You know what? I really don't know."

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The trip wasn't long, not more than thirty minutes, but since Dearka wouldn't talk anymore when Cagalli tried to bargain having a banana split instead of an ice cream float, and he really had nothing to say to Athrun or Miriallia, he discovered he was completely bored.

After about ten minutes of the ride, Cagalli had gotten tired of teasing Dearka because he just ignored her. She snuggled next to Athrun, who had his eyes closed as if napping, and decided to catch a few winks before their trip ended. With Cagalli asleep, Yzak found nothing more to divert his attention to, making him even more bored. So, since he didn't want to sleep, he centered on the only ones left talking: Kira and Lacus.

Well, they weren't really talking. Kira was looking over Lacus' shoulder as she red this really thin paperback book. Tilting his head to the right, he caught the title of the book. It was entitled "Little Red Riding Hood".

Yzak was perplexed. It was a child's book! But he couldn't have guessed because Lacus was reading it with a serious look on her face. After a while of reading, she turned to the Freedom pilot. "Kira?"

"Hmm?" he mumbled as he continued to read over her shoulder.

"Why is it that wolves are always the antagonists in these kind of stories?"

Yzak laughed to himself sardonically. How silly. Then after a moment, he stopped. _Why _are_ they always the bad guys? _Come to think of it, he had never really asked himself that question...

Kira seemed to have been thinking of the same thing. After a while, he frowned. "I don't know."

Lacus knitted her brows together and returned her gaze at the book. "I'm beginning to hate wolves. And to think I have never really met one before."

Kira, although Yzak knew that the Freedom pilot knew that it was such a sily question, nodded seriously anyway. "Neither have I."

Yzak couldn't help but smile. Lacus was the embodiment of innocence. For some weird reason, she and Kira... well... they were meant for each other.

After a while of watching the couple, he leaned his head back on the chair and sighed. He was starting to fel really good about this stay on earth.

_These are very interesting people... Maybe one of them could teach me how to ride a bike..._

_**A/N: Hello! I would like to say thanks to everyone who read, reviewed and helped with my fic! I really appreciate it. Special thanks to Klutz, who really helped me regain my confindence!**_

_**Hope you liked this chapter!**_


	6. Phase 6: Bus Rides and Checks

_**Author's Note: Thank you once again for reading and reviewing my fic. ) I'm really grateful. I would just like to make more clarifications on some of the things you have read and will be reading in this this fic. **_

**_1. Kazui, who was a wuss, is still with them. This is because I need more character interaction. And since majority of the young people in Archangel had died, I couldn't think of anyone else, so work with me, please?) _**

_**2. I really am not sure if Yzak really does or doesn't know how to ride a bike. But since he's there anyway, I just couldn't resist humbling him. (I, for one, think it would be fun seeing him squirm n two wheels. Giggle!) and **_

_**3. The way I made up Hokkaido is purely out of my crazy imagination. I'm not sure if in the time of the series it looked anything like how I made it look And since I'm having so much fun making this fic about the characters, I really will ignore any complaints about the setting... Yay!!! **_

_**Disclaimer: The characters in this fic are not mine. Gundam Seed is not mine either.**_

**_June 25 A. W._**

The shuttle bus had arrived at what looked like a small bus station where they were asked to stay and rest from their long trip. The lobby of the station was spacious with a lot of round tables and chairs scattered here and there. Lining the walls were couches and tall vases containing some strange-looking plants which the party assumed to be artificial.

Kira pounded on his left shoulder with his right fist. That ride sure made his muscles stiff. He was not used to sitting around, doing nothing, for that long a time. This was a joke. He knew the ride had not lasted more than half an hour, yet he had felt awfully restless in his seat the whole time. Had Lacus not been beside him, he would have fidgeted all throughout the trip.

_I'm always at peace when she's around, _thought as he made his way to the nearest round table and looked over to his friends. He could not help but smile at what he saw. They were really an odd crowd. His best friend, Athrun, was walking around with Cagalli on his back. The young princess had fallen asleep on the bus and would not wake up. Kira knew why. It was because Athrun didn't bother to wake her up. He had just brushed a finger gently across her cheek, and when Cagalli didn't move, he happily hoisted her on his back and carried her into the station. It was really entertaining, seeing them like that. Cagalli looked like a baby koala on a Eucalyptus tree.

Dearka was on one of the couches on the far wall, trying as best he could to look invisible. But Kira could see through him well. The reason why he was trying hard not to attract attention was because he was eyeing an oblivious Miriallia who was sitting on one of the round tables with Kazui and Sai. She, too, would once in a while glance towards the Buster pilot, but Dearka was just too fast for her. When he saw she was going to look, he would turn to Yzak, who was sitting next to him, and pretend he was saying something really important. Yzak had an expression on his face that looked like a cross between amusement and annoyance.

Kira frowned. His eyes scanned the place, but aside from the other people who had come along with them in the other shuttle busses, there was one face he couldn't see.

_Where are you, Lacus?_

The former songstress had jumped out of the bus the moment they got there and said she would only be gone for a few minutes. She didn't say where to, and Kira, who thought it to be none of his business, said that he will wait for her here. He looked at the round clock placed over the entrance of the station. Lacus had only been gone for five minutes. _Heck, it feels like an eternity..._

Now that Lacus was not beside him, he felt kind of lonely. Which was pathetic. He was starting to realize he was becoming too dependent on her. And to think it had been only two days. But right now, he just didn't care. He just wanted to be around her for as long as she would have it.

Suddenly, cool hands covered his eyes from behind. He knew who it was the moment those fingers touched his face. He honestly believed he could sense her a mile away.

"Lacus," he murmured as he peeled her hands off gently and turned to face her. Big baby blue eyes blinked as she smiled up at him, her little pink Haro hovering over her shoulder. Unusually, the thing was quiet. Under her arm were three thin paperback books. She was having the time of her life reading bedtime stories. It was funny. This ex-rebellion leader had probably read over hundreds of books that involved politics and war, but seemed to have missed this part of her life.

"Sorry I was gone long. Did you miss me?" she asked.

_Did I ever. _"You were hardly five minutes gone." _It felt like five decades._

She giggled. "I was looking for Erica."

Kira blinked. "Erica? Oh! You borrowed more books?"

Lacus flashed the three new books at him.

Kira laughed. She looked so happy holding those books up to him. "Hmm? Snow White and the Seven Dwarves, Rapunzel, and Sleeping Beauty. Good choice. No more wolves in those books."

She wrinkled her nose. "But Erica says there are witches."

Kira nodded. It was fun talking to Lacus. No one could feel anything else but happy when around her. Or at least that's what he felt. "Yeah. Evil witches. But guess what?"

Lacus was serious. She leaned forward and whispered. "What?"

Kira leaned forward, too, also speaking in a whisper. "There are handsome princes there, too."

Lacus blinked, then giggled. "Kira! You're teasing me, aren't you?"

Kira feigned innocence. "It's true. There are really handsome princes there. But I won't tell you the rest of the story. Then you'll have something to read while we wait."

This time, her face was serious. It did not suit her. She was the kind of girl who should smile all the time. "Come to think of it, what are we waiting for. Why were we taken here? I'm a little bit lost with what is going on."

Honestly, Kira was as well. Although Athrun had explained earlier what Kisaka had said, he still felt like he was completely lost. He felt like something was up.

As if on cue, a man in a crisp blue uniform came out of the double doors on the other side of the lobby with two ladies, also in uniform, following close behind. All three of them were carrying stacks and stacks of brown manila envelopes. As they made their way across the room, everyone turned to look at them. Those who were seated, along Dearka and Yzak, stood. The only one who didn't seem to care was Cagalli, who still slept soundly on Athrun's back.

Kira followed the man with his eyes. Cagalli had mentioned him earlier. She had said his name was Dellit, and except for the part where his sister said that he looked like a prune, the rest of her description matched. He was a tall man, probably in his late thirties, with black hair with a bit of silver on the temples. He had a mean face, but his eyes were gentle. He stopped in the middle of the room and started to speak. He had a deep voice.

"Welcome to EA Sapporo, Hokkaido. I am Burin Dellit, assigned to brief you on the reasons why you are here. I expect you have had a tiring trip?"

People murmured in silent agreement but fell silent when Dellit nodded. "Please take a seat."

Except for Lacus, who was used to diplomatic conversations and so had learned to accept whatever was offered to her by the other party out of respect, no one else did. It seemed that everyone was uncomfortable with their present situation, not knowing what their position was in the hands of this man. Dellit coughed uncomfortably. "Or you may stand, if you are comfortable with it." After a while, he continued. "For those of you who are not yet aware of where Hokkaido stands, I will then explain. Hokkaido is the northernmost island of Japan. As you may well remember, and for those who do not, majority of the shelters are found here. It is the only isolated part of the country big enough to accommodate Japan's civilians, so the government made use of it as a refuge. Although this country had sworn never to participate directly in a war, it still had its responsibilities towards our planet and so they supplied what other countries needed for those who were not involved in the war. Along with this, they provided what they considered as the hope of the future a home where they can live in peace, away from the memories of war. So basically, Hokkaido is a melting pot of races. But all who live here have one thing in common. They are all pretty much as young as all of you."

There were scattered murmurs from the crowd.

Kira frowned. That meant...

"So what you're saying is, Hokkaido is now a home for the young generation?"

Dellit looked over at the former songstress. "That is right, Ms. Clyne. Japan takes much care of their youth, considering them as the hope of the future. They are convinced that this generation will not create the same mistakes they have. As what is proven by you and your friends."

Kira was starting to get it. But he just had to make sure. "So that's why you invited us?"

"Yes. Well, actually, we were already planning for it after the cease fire, knowing there were young people on board. We offer you a chance to live your life here. And I assumed that you would agree. I know you have nowhere else to go, until there is finally a concrete plan. Like the sleeping princess Cagalli who would probably wish to return to her people at Orb. But until then, we have already fixed your accommodations." With this, the ladies that came along with him started giving out the manila envelopes.

Dellit, however, personally handed Kira and Lacus their envelopes. "What do you think?"

Kira took his envelope and peered into it. "I think it's wonderful. I wish I had known of this place earlier..."

Lacus giggled. Gone was her professional facade. She was also peering into her envelope. "And what are these?" She took out a smaller white envelope and blinked her big blue eyes in amazement. "Bus tickets?"

Dellit chuckled at her reaction. "Yes, Ms. Clyne. They are plane tickets bound to your destination."

Kira saw that there were other papers along with it, but he took his tickets out and read them. "These tickets lead to Abashiri..."

"Is that bad?" asked a voice from behind him. It was Athrun. He came up beside him. Cagalli was not on his back anymore. Worried for his sister, he looked back and saw Cagalli's sleeping form lying on the couch where Yzak and Dearka had sat before they went to their feet when Dellit came.

The Justice pilot turned to the man. "Hello, Mr. Dellit. My name is Athrun Zala. I am a Coordinator. I would like to ask you a question." Kira and Lacus gave each other a wondering look then both of them turned to Athrun

"Very well, Mr. Zala," Dellit said.

Athrun waved his manila envelope lightly. "Why am I given these as well?"

Dellit frowned. "Why shouldn't we?"

"We're Coordinators."

The old man didn't get it. "So what? So is Mr. Yamato."

"So am I. And Cagalli," Lacus pointed out.

Athrun was not convinced. "But - "

"How old are you, Mr. Zala?" Dellit cut him off gently.

"Sixteen, sir," Athrun said uncertainly, not sure where this was leading to.

"Then start acting like one. The war is over. If we are to bridge the gap between Coordinators and Naturals, I say we start right here. We are no different than you. Why shouldn't you get a chance to be young?" With this, the man walked away and helped in distributing more envelopes to the others.

Kira felt his heart was going to explode in his chest. Looking down at the ticket, he felt like he had won the lottery. All doubts and fears of living a normal life were disappearing. This was a start. A good start. And he was starting his life with the people he cared for. He had his best friend back, he had a sister, and he had a...

Well, he had Lacus.

Once again, his worries washed over him like a tidal wave. Now that he had everything on the way, he discovered that he had something else to worry about.

Lacus gave him an odd look when she saw he was looking at her. "Kira?"

Kira jumped, an unexpected blush taking over his face. "Wha - ? Yes?"

Lacus smiled, coming closer to him. "May I see your ticket?"

Obediently, Kira handed her his ticket. Lacus' eyes ran over it and her face broke into a smile. "Good."

"What is?"

"It's a six-hour trip, so I had to make sure."

"Of what?"

"That we are sitting next to each other."

Kira gulped. "Are we?"

Lacus raised her eyes to his and nodded. "Yes."

At that moment, Kira smiled to himself. _Thirty minutes were too much for me. What more six hours?_

But he knew that so long as Lacus was there, he would be fine.

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Half an hour later, they were on their bus to Abashiri. Busses in Japan were really cool. Their seats were like that of comfortable airplane seats. This was probably because they were designed specially for long trips.

Miriallia dropped to her seat somewhere in the middle of the bus and sighed. Luckily she had a window seat. It was her first time in Japan, and she wanted to see the view. Especially when she was going to be sitting with someone she was not familiar with. It bummed her out. Kira and Lacus got to sit next to each other, Athrun and Cagalli, too. Sai and Kazui were separated. Kazui was to sit at the back and Sai had to sit with Yzak somewhere in the front. At least she knew she wasn't the only one who was going to have a hard time. Sai almost peed in his pants when he found out he was going to be sitting with that cold-eyed boy with the nasty scar.

Sighing, she propped her elbow on the arm rest and rested her chin on her palm. _Six hours of boredom. No one to talk to. Nothing to do. Nothing could possibly get worse..._

Suddenly, it just did.

"Uhm, hello..." someone stammered from the aisle of the bus. Miriallia's face turned pale.

Turning to confirm her fear, there it was. Her greatest fear in the form of a tan boy with blond hair, eyes shifting from her to the floor.

"Dearka," she said weakly, her mouth hanging open. "You?"

Dearka seemed a little offended at her reaction. "If you don't want me to sit next to you, I can change tickets with Sai. I can sit with Yzak instead."

Miriallia would normally have jumped at the opportunity, but her conscience was nagging her. She had made Dearka feel bad. _He thinks I don't wan t to be stuck with him on this ride. And he never really did anything bad to me..._

Well, to be honest, she did not mind having him around. It was just that Cagalli had started to poke fun at her. She was afraid that the chocolate cake bribe was not going to hold her for long. But what the hey!

Miriallia shook her head. "Sit. I don't mind."

After a moment of hesitation, he finally did sit down. Miriallia felt her face heat up as his arm brushed her shoulder. They had never been this close before – if you didn't count that shower room incident, which she vowed to forget ever happened – although she doubted Cagalli will give it a rest.

"So. How are you?"

Miriallia cast her eyes downward. "I'm okay. Tired. But happy."

Dearka looked at her, letting his eyes linger too long on her face. "Hey, about that shower incident, I'm sorry."

This was certainly a surprise. Miriallia was not expecting an apology, simply because she knew it was her fault why it happened. She shrugged. "Let's not talk about it. Cagalli might hear us and blackmail us for more stuff."

"I suppose you're right."

Then they were silent. They seem to have a lot of that lately. It was as if they would always run out of things to say...

She looked out of the window as the bus revved and wheeled along slowly out of the curb.

At least there was a view she could divert her attention to. She cast a look at the pilot next to him, then cringed.

He was smiling eerily.

_At what, I wonder?_

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Dearka swallowed hard and mechanically scratched his head. As he did, wafts of strawberry and milk filled his senses. He smiled. He didn't care what Yzak thinks of it. It just smelled so good!

The girl looked at him queerly. "Why... why are you smiling?"

Feeling like a complete dork, he stopped and shrugged. "Nothing. I just remembered something funny." He sighed when the girl turned back to the window.

Kicking himself for being an ass, he once again asked himself why oh **_WHY _**he ever let Sai talk him into swapping tickets with him! Well, he really didn't argue with him either. So he didn't have anyone to blame but himself. But had he known he was going to be so bad at starting a conversation, he would have just chucked the idea the moment Sai had proposed it.

After about over an hour, he was completely jaded. He tried to look out the window but was afraid that Miriallia might think he was looking at her and start getting uncomfortable. So he settled on taking a nap. He tried to make himself comfortable on the chair. He almost got it, when suddenly, a blond head popped up from the seat in front of him.

Dearka jumped.

"Hello," Cagalli greeted. It was just a greeting, but he started to get awfully defensive. Miriallia, she saw, was white as a sheet, but she said hello anyway.

Luckily, Cagalli found a different target for that trip. Dearka discovered, since Cagalli had pointed them out, that Kira and Lacus were sitting right behind him and Miriallia. He peeked from the aisle and looked at the couple. They were asleep. Lacus had her head resting on Kira's shoulder, the Freedom pilot's chin nestled on her pink hair. Two books were in the girl's arms, and another book was in Kira's hand. This one was open

When Miriallia saw that Cagalli was not aiming at them, she started to relax.

"So, how do you think their doing?" Cagalli asked, resting her chin on her arms that she folded on top of the chair.

"Doing with what?" came Athrun's voice from his chair. Dearka heard pages of some book or magazine or paper being flipped. He was probably reading.

Cagalli turned to him. "I don't know. Everything. Kira, he has feelings for Lacus. And I can tell, Lacus feels the same way. But... I can feel like something's... off..."

Dearka blinked in disbelief. "Off? Kira is glued to Lacus' side. What could be off about that?"

Miriallia turned to him. "It's different. It's like, all of these feelings going on between them are left unspoken, so there aren't any certainties to it yet."

Athrun spoke up again. "Leave Kira alone. He's always been like that, since we were young. Takes his time. Moves slow but sure. That kind of thing. He's probably gathering the courage to tell her, you know, to make it official."

Cagalli, as always, was not satisfied with it. "It's just taking so long."

"No one needs to hurry," the Justice pilot said. Dearka grinned to himself. Cagalli and Athrun, they were total extremes. It was funny. He could not see one of them without the other.

Miriallia agreed with Cagalli, though. Girls, they always seem to want to be on the same side. "Dearka, you don't understand. Kira's been through a lot when it came to that department. After Fllay... well, Kira's morale was shattered. And if it weren't for Lacus... he would have never recovered."

Cagalli frowned at the mention of the name. "Fllay... Good thing she died."

"That's not nice, Cagalli. Kira was very upset with what happened. He said, that in a way, Fllay had redeemed herself," Athrun said, more shuffling of papers coming from his side of the seat.

"Whatever. Let's not talk about her. I still say Kira should hurry up and propose to Lacus. And while he's at it, he sh - "

Cagalli's words were drowned by Athrun's sudden loud surprised scream. Everyone on the bus turned their heads to him. He was now standing on his seat. Dearka was baffled. Arthun's patient and silent demeanor was abruptly gone. What on earth could be the reason?

Cagalli stared at him with wide-eyed bewilderment. "What happened? Did something bite you?"

Dearka, he soon realized, was on his feet. When he looked behind him, he saw Kira was also alert. Lacus' eyes were widely searching Arthrun's face. Miriallia, he saw – and he swallowed hard when he did – was gripping his arm tightly. Athrun's sudden outburst had startled her. When she realized what she was doing, she immediately let go and sat promptly on her seat, but still waited for a reply from the blue-blue-haired boy.

Athrun had the manila envelope that was given to him earlier clutched in one had, and on the other was a smaller paper, thinner, whiter and attached to it was a purple stationery that looked like a note.

Kira, still on edge for having been disturbed in his slumber, asked him the question everyone was probably asking. "What is it?"

Athrun raised the purple note in his hand to his face. "It's a note from Dellit. It reads: 'To all, Once again I welcome you to Hokkaido. Along with your tickets are cardkeys for your sleeping quarters when you reach Abashiri in Mount Tento Area. Also, in your manila envelopes, I have included recommendations to Abashiri University. I believe that you will be of much help there as they will be of much help to you. Be young. And enjoy.'"

Cagalli groaned. "That's it? We're going to school?"

Athrun shook his head. "There's more. 'P.S. Included in this envelope is a check amounting to one hundred thousand Yen as a start-up allowance for each of you. Please do not think that this is favoring you. Since the war is over, the funds that used to be allotted for war are now allotted for more important things. Education. The youth, we believe, should come equipped with this weapon." Athrun ended with a hysterical laugh. "Cagalli, they gave us money! And we're going to school! Ha-ha!"

At this, Cagalli didn't waste any time. It was obvious she didn't like the idea of going to school, but the money was another story. "Get out!" she said in disbelief. Along with pretty much everyone else on that bus, she dove for her manila envelope and emerged with her own check, laughing. Athrun scooped her up in his arms and almost fell off the seat. Kira, although not as loud as everyone else, was laughing with a very speechless Lacus.

Dearka was thunderstruck. He really didn't know how to react. It was just money, after all. But when he looked over to Miriallia, who was smiling from ear to ear, he asked her why they were so happy.

Miriallia turned to him, eyes shining. "It's not just money, Dearka. It's our life. It's our youth, being handed to us freely. The mere fact that something was given to us and we didn't even have to fight for, it means a lot to us!" With this, she gripped his arm tightly, this time with no hesitation. "Doesn't it mean anything to you?"

Dearka blinked. To him, not really, but if it made her happy, just seeing her touching him without cringing, he would have given all the money in the world. "It means something to me, too. Miriallia. It means something to me, too..."

_**A/N: Well, not really the chapter I was aiming for. Kinda crappy, but it sort of hit me that they won't be able to live their life without money anyways... Hehehe! Sorry for the crap. I'll make it up to you next chapter. **_

_**Oh, and sorry for the typos... R and R plzzzz! **_


	7. Phase 7: The Game of Hearts

**_Author's Note: Hello! Thanks for the reviews again and sorry for all the errors on the last chapter. I wasn't able to edit it. Semi-final exams and all that... After my exams, I can't believe I actually will make them go to school... - -"Oh, well._**

_**R and R please!**_

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_**June 25 AW Afternoon**_

It had amazed Athrun how the people in Japan had kept their culture preserved all this time. Everything, he saw as he had kept looking out the window in the duration of the trip, held no trace of the war... Everything was green. At every stop the bus made in towns and cities along the way, he could tell he was looking forward to this.

He felt himself laugh at the memory of Cagalli's face when he reminded her that they were going to school. He really did not know of the little princess' educational background, but whatever it was, it must have left a bad taste in the mouth. Looking over to the sleeping blond girl next to him, he could not help but laugh more. She had been sleeping for hours now; she must have spent the remainder of her energy squealing with Milly about the money. They had gone on and on about what they were going to do with it. He didn't bother to listen much from that conversation. Instead, he busied himself with thinking of what subjects he was going to take in University. He had a list ready already. On top of it was Music.

He looked back out the window.

_Maybe the piano wouldn't be that hard to learn..._

At that, memories of his friend, Nicol, hijacked his mind. An uncontrollable sadness filled his heart at the reminiscences. He was just too young to have died that way. And for some weird reason, he felt like he was being unfair to those who have died because he had survived, and was given a chance at this peace all of them had fought for...

Cagalli's stirring made him turn from the window. Her eyes opened and stared at him blankly for a while. They were beautiful eyes. She blinked and smiled groggily. Not saying anything, she leaned her head on the Justice pilot's shoulder and hopped on the train back to dreamland. She loved to nap, it seems. He did not mind. This was probably Cagalli's first time to realize she had developed the love for sleep. It was their first time, after all, to be given the freedom to determine what they wanted.

Again, Athrun continued his sight-seeing. The bus was rolling along another town. It was then did he discover that Dellit was right. So far along the way did he realize that majority of the people he had seen were all young. Girls and boys alike walked around the streets in groups of twos or threes, talking and laughing at a shared joke. Some of them were wearing uniforms, some in civilian attire, all, however were smiling. He felt kind of envious, really, until he remembered that in a few more hours, they, too will be among those people, having fun and enjoying themselves. He couldn't wait.

_Yeah, music won't be too bad, I guess._

His thoughts were distracted when he saw someone coming down the aisle towards him. He smiled when he recognized who it was.

"Yzak. Hi," he greeted the light-haired boy.

Yzak, however, did not look at all happy. The moment he stopped by their seat, he looked at Cagalli's sleeping form, then turned to Athrun. "Are we there yet?"

Athrun's eyes widened in amazement. For a while there, Yzak sounded like he was whining. Then again, he had always been impatient about a lot of things. "I'm not sure. I think we should be there anytime soon. Why?"

An embarrassed look passed Yzak's face. "Nothing."

"If you tell me, I might be able to help you."

Yzak looked over to Cagalli again. It was as if he wanted to make sure the girl really was asleep. Shifting uncomfortably, he made his confession. "I need to use the bathroom."

Athrun felt a laugh bubble up in his throat, but before he could say anything, Cagalli let out a snort. So she wasn't asleep after all. Yzak frowned down at her. "Laugh at me, why don't you. I'm serious. I need to go. Now."

Dearka, who was in the seat behind Cagalli, also chuckled silently. Yzak didn't like that. "Shut up, Dearka."

Dearka raised his arms as if in surrender. "Sorry."

Yzak turned to Athrun. "You're the only the who can help me."

"Why's that?"

"Because you're the only one who's not laughing. Tell me, is there a cubicle in this bus?"

Athrun was greatly amused. There was one in the back. He had used it earlier about half an hour ago. Anyone could have spotted it. What was really interesting about this conversation was that Yzak could have found it anyway even if he didn't ask. _He's bored. He wants someone to talk to. _

He watched as Yzak nodded and shuffled away to the bathroom. After a while, he came back out and avoided his look. Smiling, he continued to look out of the window and gasped happily when he saw the big brown wooden sign that said Welcome to Abashiri City. A painting of a small squirrel and a red fox was next to it.

_We're here..._

He nudged Cagalli gently. "Hey, Cagalli. Wake up. We're here."

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Their euphoria only lasted a few moments, until they were informed that they were not going to be staying in one dorm. It appeared that the Girls' Residential Quarters were on the Second District, ten blocks away from the Boys' RQ in Twelfth. Maybe it was just him being used to having them all under one roof of a battleship, but Kira was not all that elated at the discovery. He was going to be away from Lacus again...

Pressing his face on the cold glass of the window to look out to their three girls, along with a dozen other female staff from the battleships, he sighed. Lacus was waving out to them with a wide smile as the bus wheeled away from Second. Kira felt his heart sink as the pink-haired Songstress' face disappeared from his view. What a sissy he has become, barely being able to hold himself together. He knew he was still going to see her again, but still...

Athrun took the seat next to him and lightly patted him on the shoulder. "Stop doing that."

Kira turned to him. "Doing what?"

"Looking like a lost puppy dog. She'll be but several blocks away. You'll hardly miss her."

Kira doubted it. He was missing her already. He didn't even know why. They really didn't do anything the whole trip but sleep and read her bedtime stories, which really could not be considered as perfect bonding time, but still, he found himself wanting more bedtime stories and naps. He nodded to his friend anyway. "Yeah. I know."

Athrun leaned his head back on the seat and sighed, looking up the ceiling of the bus. Kira doubted he was fine with these arrangements, because he looked like he a little boy who had just lost his balloon. "So, Kira. Guess this is it, huh?"

Kira eyed his best friend curiously. "What?"

"You and Lacus."

The statement surprised him. He was expecting Athrun to refer to their life now, but instead, he mentioned about is ex-fiancée. Which was very awkward for him. Come to think of it, this was the first time they even stopped to talk about this specific topic; Athrun's relationship with Lacus. With everything happening so fast in space then, it was like there hadn't been enough time to draw formalities on certain relationships...

Kira fidgeted in his seat, trying to find the most comfortable spot. "Lacus and me? What about us?"

"Everything about you. What else is there to talk about?"

The Freedom pilot scratched behind his ear and laughed quietly. "I don't know. Can I be honest with you?"

"You know you can be, Kira."

"I don't know what I'm feeling right now, talking to you about this. Come to think of it, it's been a while we've stopped and talked..."

At this, his best friend smiled. "Yeah, it's been a while. I'm glad we get to catch up." He turned to Kira. "But I won't let you change the subject. I was asking about Lacus."

"Well, I wasn't trying to change it. I was just trying to gather up energy for this talk. I wasn't aware until now that I've been waiting for this moment for a long time now."

And this was true. Kira had not realized it, but he had wanted to talk to Athrun about his feelings for Lacus Clyne, who used to be engaged to him. Shrugging, he turned to the window. "Athrun, I think I am having feelings – deep feelings – for Lacus. What? Why are you laughing?"

Athrun was laughing. Pretty loudly, might he add. The Justice pilot socked him playfully on the arm. Kira was a little offended. His friend was laughing at him after he had just made the biggest confession in his life! "Sorry, Kira. It's just that... well... You didn't have to say it for me to know. I can see it in you. She likes you, too."

Kira frowned at him. "And you don't mind?"

This time, Athrun stopped laughing. "Mind? Why would I mind?"

"Well, you know..."

"Because she was my fiancée before?"

Kira nodded. He was starting to believe that his feelings were going to be the biggest battle he had ever been in. It was such a complicated thing. He hoped to God he will emerge victorious.

Athrun also looked out the window. He had turned serious. The change was remarkable. He looked sad. "It's because I was stupid, Kira. Lacus and I... we really weren't meant to be, I guess."

Fear gripped Kira's heart. Was that regret he detected in his friend's voice? If so, how do people deal with these situations?

Athrun saw his look and immediately eased his mind. "No, Kira. I am not in love with Lacus anymore. Sometimes, I even ask myself if I ever did. Now don't get me wrong. She mattered to me more than the world ever did, and she still is really important to me, but then again, I never really knew if it was love." He sighed and stretched his arms over his head. "We hardly ever saw each other before. When I would come home to PLANT, I'd see her, and she would always be happy to see me, running around and playing with her Haro. Once in a blue moon, that was. And I didn't know if she really did love me, too. All I knew was that I was to marry her. My feelings didn't matter then. Nothing did, because the decisions weren't mine to make."

Kira nodded slowly, half understanding, half truly lost. "And Cagalli?" He suddenly felt protective. What if his friend was unsure of his feelings for his sister. He swore that if he ever found out Athrun was out to break Cagalli's heart, he'll break the Justice pilot's kneecaps.

But at the mention of Cagalli's name, Athrun's face broke up into a very, very VERY wide smile. "Cagalli! It wasn't until I met her did I realize I had wanted to live long enough to see that war through. It was like, she cared for me in an unexplainable way, regardless of what I am. It never mattered to her. So long as I stayed alive." He touched his chest. Kira knew that somewhere inside his clothes was Cagalli's pendant, the charm she had given him, to keep him safe. "She means a lot to me, so don't worry your brotherly butt. I'll take care of her."

It was now Kira's turn to laugh. "You'd better. Or you'll deal with me, her older brother."

Athrun shook his head. "Don't let Cagalli hear you say that. She's convinced you're the younger twin."

Kira laughed. He was starting to feel better. "I know. But Athrun?"

"Yeah?"

"You think... You think Lacus and I...?"

With this Athrun turned to him, a serious expression on his face. "Listen well, my friend, because this is the first and the last time I get to say this."

Kira was genuinely curious. "What?"

Athrun leaned forward and continued in a whisper. "I was jealous out of my mind because before when Lacus couldn't stop taking about you after your first encounter."

"What? Get out!"

His friend laughed. "It's true! And here's another."

Kira was _really _curious. "What?"

"After I started having feelings for Cagalli, I was soooo relieved when I found out you were her brother!"

With this, Kira couldn't hold it any longer. He burst out laughing. He couldn't remember having laughed that loud before. Athrun laughed with him. It felt good, laughing. He didn't care if the other people he didn't know looked at him strange. It was about time he stopped caring what other people thought of him and started caring about what he felt. He had compromised his personal happiness for far too long. Maybe, just maybe, life would be fairer to him from now on...

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Dearka could have pinched himself and had it not hurt too much, he would have thought he was dreaming. Before Miriallia had left on Second, she had done something he was not expecting she would in a thousand years. She smiled at him, and said in a very nice tone, "So I'll be seeing you."

Not that it was the most romantic phrase in the whole world, but she had actually addressed him! She, Miriallia Haww, was going to see him around! Whoopee!

His wonderful thought of Miriallia seeing him around disintegrated the moment Yzak crashed on the seat Miriallia had vacated.

"You look as bad as you smell," the light-haired pilot snickered as he looked over at him.

Dearka turned to him. "Thank you. I'm glad you noticed." He was in too good a mood to let his friend annoy him. _Miriallia is going to see me around!_

Yzak laughed. Dearka was surprised. Seems like he, too, was starting to lighten up. It must be the atmosphere. It was beautiful in Abashiri. "Part of me is happy that the men's RQ aren't near the women's."

"Why?" Dearka asked, although he did not have a good feeling on what he was going to say. He knew a punch line was going to come after that statement. He was right.

"Because I don't want you using that girl's shampoo and contaminating the dorm with Strawberries and Lactose."

Dearka shoved him away, laughing. "Will you stop making fun of her shampoo?"

Yzak' eyes widened innocently. "I'm not making fun of her shampoo. I'm making fun of _you,_ _using _her shampoo. Those are totally different things."

"Well, I happen to like her shampoo."

Yzak probably saw that Deark was not getting as annoyed as planned him to be, so he stopped playing around and started a decent conversation. "It's nice here. But aren't we going to go back to PLANT?"

Dearka hadn't really thought about that part. He was too busy trying to look good in front of Miriallia – and was failing miserably – that he forgot the reason why he had come in the first place. He scratched his head. Once again strawberries filled his senses. Yzak wrinkled his nose. "I had come to help out, but I never expected that we will be treated like this. Don't tell me you do not like it?"

Yzak brushed the question aside. "I do, but when we get called upon by PLANT, we have to go back."

"I know, but until then, can't you try to relax a bit?"

With this, the light-haired boy blinked and nodded. "You're right. So tell me about Miriallia."

"What?!" Yzak could change the subject smoother than anyone. Count on him for asking out that blunt question. "There's nothing to talk about."

And as if things weren't worse enough, Kazui and Sai left their seats and propped themselves conveniently on the vacant seats in front of them, both of them kneeling on their seats, facing them, as Cagalli did earlier. This really was not his day.

Kazui waved at him. "Hi. I heard you're talking about our friend, Milly. So we came over and maybe you'd want to ask for our help. We know loads of stuff about her."

Dearka wanted to crawl under his seat. _Great. Just great..._

Yzak, on the other hand looked like he was having the time of his life. He usually wasn't good at socializing, but having found allies at his conquest on making this specific bus ride a living hell, he quickly took up their offer. "Yes, we are talking about this girl named Miriallia Haww." Had Dearka not been so pissed with his friend, he would have laughed at his professional tone. He continued on with it. "I am Yzak Jule, Dearka's friend. We are both fairly skilled in combat, and I was hoping that we are equally gifted in the game of hearts. Any help would be greatly appreciated."

Dreaka pulled at Yzak's arm. "What has gotten into you?" he hissed in his ear.

With this, Yzak turned to him, and it surprised the Buster pilot that his friend's eyes contained as much confusion he right then felt. "I don't know, Dearka... I feel like I just want to let loose since I have a good enough excuse to fool around. We've always been trained to follow orders and lead in battle, but right now, I feel like, yeah, I do want to be young for a change."

Dearka was not happy though. "You can be young and be free but not at my expense. I'm happy, Yzak, that you decided to lighten up. But please, please, PLEASE not when it came to Miriallia!"

Sai raised his hand happily over his head and started talking very, very loud. "**_OH, WHAT DID YOU SAY, DEARKA? YOU DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS FOR MILLY? WHY?"_**

No sooner were those words out of the mouth of the guy with the glasses was Dearka on his feet, violently clobbering Sai under is arm. Sure, the rest of the people in the bus didn't know him, and he didn't know them, but somehow, Sai screaming his obvious discomfort on his feelings for Miriallia did not sit well with him. "Shut up, man!"

This time, Kazui targeted him**_. "WHAT, DEARKA? YOU WANT US TO SHUT UP SO THAT OTHER PEOPLE WON'T HEAR OF YOUR FEELINGS FOR MILLY?"_**

Dearka stared at Kazui in disbelief, Sai's neck still locked under his arm. "_What the heck did I ever do to you?_" he demanded.

Yzak was holding his stomach from pure laughter. "Oh, man! I have never had so much fun before! I like bus rides. It's better than riding a Gundam!"

_Yzak! He's the one behind this! _Dearka thought, feeling completely beaten and outnumbered. Sighing, he let go of Sai, who was also laughing his ass off. Kazui, however, started to address him normally. "Dearka, I really am sorry."

"Oh, now you're apologizing."

Sai recovered from his laughing but and joined in the conversation. "It's just that, well, Milly, she's our friend. And, well, now that everyone is happy, we want her to be happy."

Dearka narrowed his eyes at them. "Oh, now I get it. You want to make me miserable, because Miriallia will be happy if I'm not happy, is that it?"

Kazui raised his hand, shaking his head. "Oh, quite the opposite. We can tell she likes you a lot and, well, Milly, she's a passive girl, and she'll let every opportunity slip her hands if no one would give her the occasional shove. And, well, we're attacking and convincing you to make your move."

Dearka pointed to Yzak. "And he's here to help with your cause, too?"

Sai shook his head seriously. "Nope. He's here mainly for the heck of it all. I kind of blabbed a lot about you and Milly when we were in the Archangel, and he said he wanted to listen."

Dearke could swear that however tan he was, with all the blood creeping up his face, he could easily be as red as a strawberry, which was funny, since he already smelled like one.

Yzak will never let this die down. He stared at his friend, who was still squirming in laughter.

Amid all his frustrations and embarrassment, however, it felt nice to see his friend laugh like that. It was really disturbing, seeing him groveling from fits of chuckles and tears – he felt like he was watching a rock laugh - but perhaps this was for the best.

_**BUT THERE WAS NO WAY HE WAS GOING TO BE THE BUTT OF HIS ENTERTAINMENT!!!**_

With a wild scream, Dearka lunged at Yzak and grabbed him by the neck. The strangled Coordinator gave a loud yelp, but was too late to react when Dearka had managed into getting him into a chokehold. However, he did not stop laughing.

Dearka smirked. If he was going to play dirty, then so be it. "Yzak, if you don't stop laughing, I will tell everyone here your, **_deepest, darkest _**secret."

That learned him. Yzak stopped laughing instantly. "What secret?"

"Oh, let's just say that it involves pedals and two wheels. Need I go on?"

Yzak narrowed his eyes at him menacingly. "Fine... I'll shut up."

Dearka released him. Smiling smugly to himself, he settled back on his seat and listened at Miriallia's two friends who started talking about his sweet-smelling girl's favorite food. Yes, she was his. And this was because no one has claimed her for himself yet.

He looked over at Yzak, who had fallen into a silence that had everything to do about his bike problem.

_You're not gonna get any ice cream floats or chocolate cakes from me, buddy..._

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**_A/N: Hello! I had fun writing this chapter, and so I'm not sure it made any sense to you. LOL! Most of them, especially Dearka's part, were random thoughts that entered my mind while I was typing them. Hehehe!_**

**_Oh, by the way, I am thinking of having a love triangle on any of the three couples, but I'm not sure which couple it should be. I want to make them experience the things teenagers normally consider so right now I am open for suggestions and you're good advice again... Seems like I'm running out of interesting ideas... Oh, well... Please read and review!!!_**

_**Oh, and I have not edited this chapter either, so if there are a lot of typos, I apologize... smile!smile!**_


	8. Phase 8: The Ketchup Bottle of Truth

**_Author's Note: Hehehehe!!! Thank you for all the reviews and for the suggestions. And since majority don't want anyone coming in between Kira and Lacus as well as Cagalli and Athrun, I will spare them. (And since I received a threat from Yami that he'll flame me with the Fires of Hell! LOL!!! )And yes, Yami, I am aware of the currency. ) I didn't want to give them too much money coz it might seem too farfetched if they give them more than that. Hehehehe! And I kind of wanted them to have an excuse to find part time jobs, just to make things interesting! YAAAAY!!!!! _**

**_Hehehe! I guess I might as well explain why I made the setting in Abashiri. You see, I've spent majority of my Summer vacations there since I was twelve. Studied a bit of their language and culture so I kind of wanted to play it safe and let the gang stay there than any other place in Hokkaido. Besides, it's really beautiful there and I think they'll really enjoy living there, too!!! Yaaay!_**

_**Anyway, please Read and Review!!! It makes me really happy when I know you're liking my fic! **_

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**_June 27 AW, Morning_**

It has been two days since they had settled in Second, and honestly, it was not at all bad. Three were to share a pad, which was good, since Cagalli was not that excited to be alone in a room. At first the arrangements did not meet her expectations, because she and Milly got to be in one pad with a stranger and Lacus was to share a pad with two others. She talked to the girl who was supposed to bunk in with them and luckily, she immediately agreed to swap with the pink-haired songstress.

Found on the second floor of the Women's condominium, the pad was very spacious, subdivided into six smaller sections; a living, kitchen and dining, a toilet and bath and of course, three small rooms for each of the girls. Beddings and the like were provided, but except for it, the pad was relatively bare. So basically, the first day was allotted for shopping.

This, the girls enjoyed. Downtown Abashiri was merely a twenty-minute bus ride away and since Spring was saying goodbye and Summer was fast approaching, they decided to stock up. So they had left in the morning bringing nothing but money in their pockets and returning with so many paper bags and boxes filled with clothes and grocery items they could barely fit inside their pad door.

The second day had been lazy. The only thing they did was sleep in until noon, and had it not been for Lacus' Haro, which started saying _Kira! Kira! Kira! o_ver and over again while floating around in the living room, they probably had slept the day away. They had then taken advantage of the time by faxing their recommendations to Abashiri University.

Those past days, they had neither seen nor heard from the boys, which was really fine with them. It was the first time they had had time for themselves to sit around and talk and do absolutely nothing that concerned matters of consequence.

Today, Cagalli woke up to the smell of sautéed garlic. Coming out of her room and not at all conscious that the only thing she had on was a thin white shirt and her underwear, she went straight to the kitchen, where she found Lacus in a purple apron draped over her pj's her hair in a high ponytail. She was bending over to adjust the heat of their electric stove. The former songstress can cook?

When Lacus saw her, she smiled her wide smile. "Good morning, Cagalli. I made fried rice and Tamagoyaki."

Cagalli frowned. "Tama- what?"

"Tamagoyaki. It's an egg recipe I saw on TV last night." She pointed to the yellow rolls arranged neatly on the plate on their low dining table. "It's just eggs, spring onion and a bit of pepper and salt."

Cagalli scratched her head and went to Lacus' side, feeling slightly embarrassed for having slept late. "I didn't know you could cook."

Lacus laughed. She was just so perky. No one should be allowed to be this perky in the morning. "Neither did I. I just followed the recipe and I came up with that. The rice is done. Shall we eat?"

"Where's Milly?"

"I'm here." With this, Miriallia came out of the bathroom, smiling. Why was everyone smiling today?

Cagalli helped Lacus transfer the rice from the pan to a bowl and Miriallia set the table.

"So," Miriallia started as she slowly placed three plated on the round dining table in front of the three chairs. "How do you think the boys are doing?"

Cagalli, placing the rice in the middle of the table, blinked then shrugged. "Probably being the boys that they are."

With this, she paused, as did Lacus and Milly. After a moment of silence, they broke into muffled snickers, each with her own thought of Kira and the rest trying to make breakfast.

Settling comfortably around the table, Lacus pulled out a sheet of paper from her pocket and cleared her throat. "The University faxed back and guess what?"

Cagalli got a generous serving of the rice and skewered that egg-thingy with her fork. "What?" She really was not that excited with the idea of going to school, but what the hey. Athrun was really looking forward to it, so she might as well.

"We get to start school next week. We're to report on to them to fix our schedule. We could all go together with the boys. Who knows? Maybe they'd like to take some classes together."

Milly looked really happy about it. "I wonder what subjects I'll take."

Cagalli sneered slyly. "Well, if you've decided, give me the list."

Mrirallia eyed her suspiciously. "Why?"

Lacus leaned forward and held back a giggle. "So she can give it to Mr. Elthman, of course."

With this, Milly almost choked on her fork. Coughing violently, she started to protest. "Lacus! How could you? Don't tell me I have to deal with your teasing, too..."

Lacus tried to look innocent. She was doing a really good job with it, too. "Whatever do you mean? I was just pointing it out. I, for one, would do the same thing. I could not help but notice that Dearka has become really fond of you."

Milly's face darkened a few shades redder. She abandoned all thought of eating and turned to Lacus. "Please stop teasing me. I really does make me uncomfortable."

Cagalli, however, brushed her pleading away. With one swipe of her arm, she cleared away the center of the table, grabbed the empty ketchup bottle form the cupboard right behind her, and slammed it on the surface of the table with a loud "HAH!"

Milly went pale. Lacus was amused. "Oh. Are we going to play spin the bottle?"

Cagalli nodded enthusiastically. "We're gonna be living with each other for a long time, so we might as well try to get to know each other, right?"

Miriallia shook her head in disapproval. "But can't we just, you know, get to know each other _without _the bottle?"

Lacus titled her head tot the side. "What's wrong with having a ketchup bottle to determine who gets to suffer first. Come on, Milly. We have nothing better to do."

Milly bit her lip nervously. "Why don't we just read some of your books, Lacus? That's fun, right?"

Lacus shook her head. "I don't want to read books without Kira next to me."

Cagalli's eyes twinkled. Hehehe! This was the perfect opportunity to weasel juicy information from both of them! Well, actually she knew she will not be having a hard time with this, as everyone knows that she and Athrun have something going on. Unlike these two, who keep on denying everything that happens to be the most obvious thing in the world.

Milly gulped. Cagalli did not understand what the heck she was nervous about, but right now, she didn't care. All she wanted was a confession from these two. "Let's play SPIN THE BOTTLE!" she yelled excitedly, twisting her wrist around and sending the bottle reeling.

Lacus giggled happily, clapping her hands in glee. "Yay!"

After a few turns, it slowed down and unceremoniously pointed at the now cowering Miriallia, who howled an ear-splitting "_NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!_"

Lacus didn't seem to mind. She turned to Cagalli, her ponytail swinging. "Shall I ask the question, or you?"

Cagalli grinned evilly. "Both of us should ask. I'll ask first. What were you and Dearka doing in the showers then?"

Lacus gasped. "_You _were in the showers with _Dearka?_"

Cagalli was having so much fun! Weeeee! "Yes she was. With her on top of him, might I add."

Lacus was scandalized. "Really?"

Cagalli could swear the timid girl would faint any minute.

Lacus grinned uncharacteristically in a naughty way. "My, oh my. Were you having fun?"

With this, Milly snapped at them. "Hey! One question at a time!"

Cagalli laughed. "Fine. What were you doing in the showers with him?"

Milly tried to regain whatever dignity she had left. Raising her chin, she started to explain. "I was washing his hair. That was all."

Lacus' eyes widened even more. "Oh! So that's why he smelled like a strawberry."

Cagalli cackled. "Yeah, strawberry boy."

Milly grinned inspite of herself. "Well, I kind of was feeling sorry for him. So I tried to help out. I was a little careless and ended up slipping, and he tried to save me, and then he was careless, and... well... you know the rest."

Lacus propped her elbows on the table, chin in hands. "Oh, how sweet..."

Milly frowned. "Why was it sweet? It never even made me feel at all romantic towards him."

Lacus shook a finger at the very naïve girl. "Milly, Mr. Elthman made sure he was the one under you so you will not get hurt when you hit the floor. He was very gentlemanly, if you ask me. Don't you think so, Cagalli?"

Cagalli doubted it, though. "Well, if you put it that way, Lacus, I guess it was. But I think Dearka just wanted a bit of action then."

Milly groaned. "Cagalli! And to think I was starting to feel better."

"Whatever. Spin the bottle, Milly. Let's see who we have to torture next."

Milly spun the bottle. It pointed right at Lacus.

The songstress laughed nervously.

Cagalli was elated. "Lacus, what do you feel about Kira?"

This time, it was Lacus' turn to blush. "Kira?"

Milly nodded. "That's what I'd like to know, too."

Lacus smiled shyly. This was the type of person who would never lie to herself. "I am very fond of him, really. I guess... I do have feelings for him."

_Score! _Cagalli thought. His younger brother would love that piece of information. "Wehehe! That settles it. Tomorrow, he has to do something."

Lacus' happy face turned sour. "Cagalli, please don't do anything."

With this, the princess' eyes widened in shock. "Like hell I won't."

Milly worriedly reached out and touched Lacus' arm. "What's wrong, Lacus?"

The songstress tugged nervously at her ear and sighed. "Well, I don't want Kira to get pressured with his feelings. And, well, I'm not really in a hurry. Right now, I'm enjoying the slow but sure steps Mr. Yamato is taking. So please. Let him deal with this on his own."

Cagalli pursed her lips but nodded anyway. "Fine. You owe me a banana split. Spin the bottle, Lacus."

Lacus did so, and luckily, it pointed to Cagalli. The princess snickered to herself. These girls won't be able to weasel anything from her that she would be too shy to say. She was DAMN PROUD of her boyfriend! And she wasn't at all ashamed to tell anyone of their relationship.

Milly, however asked her the most unexpected question. Leaning forward, she asked in a whisper. "Have you and Athrun kissed?"

Cagalli recovered quickly from her surprise, she grabbed the bottle and said in a very loud voice. "You betcha! We kiss almost all the time!"

_DAMN PROUD OF IT!_

Lacus looked at the princess admiringly. "Really? How sweet. I'm envious, Cagalli. You seem to know how to deal with these things so well."

_DAMN RIGHT!_

Cagalliu stood up on her chair, her back to the front door. Maybe she was a little overdoing it, but maybe if she showed these girls how you should act with your feelings, maybe they'd catch up soon enough. She spread her arms wide. "At first, I was all shy, but Athrun just takes my breath away! We kiss like there's no tomorrow!"

Suddenly, an odd look crossed both Lacus and Miriallia's face, a bit blue, or maybe gray. They were staring up at her in disbelief. But after moment, Milly shook herself from that state and smiled crustily. "Really? Tell us more."

Lacus, who looked like she was holding back laughter, nodded. "Ooh, please. Tell us more."

Cagalli grinned to herself. _This'll learn you two. _"He has a way with his tongue, you see? Like, I don't know. It's an indescribable feeling."

Lacus laughed out loud, then covered her mouth quickly. "Really?"

Milly blinked back tears as she was also holding back a laugh. "Then what?"

Cagalli frowned. _Why are they laughing?_

This is why.

Suddenly, realization hit her. Her breath caught in her throat and slowly, painfully, she looked over her shoulder.

There, in the doorway, that now lay open, stood a very shocked Athrun, his mouth hanging open, his face an unhealthy shade of blue. Right behind him was a squatting Kira, his arms around his stomach, laughing uncontrollably yet silently. Dearka was right next to Yzak, both of them had their hands stuffed in their pockets, looking unappreciatively at the ceiling at an attempt to save whatever remaining dignity Athrun had as his girlfriend had just announced to everyone that he had a "_way with his tongue"_. Kazui and Sai were nowhere in sight, but Cagalli could hear the duo laughing their asses off somewhere down the hallway.

Cagalli gulped. Not only this. One of the reasons why Dearka, Yzak and Kira were not looking was because she, Cagalli Yula Attha, was standing on a chair high above ground, holding a ketchup bottle in her underwear.

Cagalli felt faint.

Athrun blinked in disbelief.

Cagalli swallowed hard and hopped off the chair nonchalantly. A princess is always dignified whatever the circumstances! "Excuse me. I will go get my pj's." And with this, she took her time in crossing the room, and slammed the door behind her when she reached her sleeping quarters.

When she heard the lock click, she hit her head seventeen times in a row.

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

Athrun watched as Cagalli slammed the door of her room. As soon as she was gone, everyone exploded. He felt like he wanted the floor to open up and swallow hm alive.

Dearka leaned on his shoulder, tears leaking down his cheeks. "Oh, Athrun! You take my breath away!" he said in a high-pitched voice which sounded nothing like Cagalli.

Kira leaned on his other shoulder. "Can you show us, Athrun? What you do with your tongue that's so unexplainable to my sister?" He guffawed loudly, holding his side.

Athrun was not amused. "Well, at least I've kissed the girl that I love. Unlike you guys."

Kira fell to the floor, rolling in laughter. "I- I don't mind! Now I can take pointers from you! You dog you!"

Yzak chuckled silently as he made his way to the table and looked at the breakfast the girls were having. "Oh, food." He plucked a piece of the tamagoyaki and popped it in his mouth.

At first, Athrun thought at least Yzak was on his side.

He was wrong.

Very meanly, Yzak turned to him. "Did you practice with hard candy? Or was the skill in-born?"

Athrun frowned. This was not going to be a good day. He knocked away Dearka who was still clinging to his shoulder. "Get away from me, strawberry boy."

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

**_A/N: Not much sense here either... ) I'll really make it up. Promise! HEhehehe! I just couldn't resist making Cagalli pay for being a meanie to Milly and Lacus. Hehehe! _**

_**Oh, well... R and R please!!!**_

**_Oh, and I haven't edited this one either... Sorry..._**


	9. Phase 9: Yzak Learns to Ride A Bike

_**June 27, AW Afternoon**_

The problem with having nothing to do – like shooting nukes from the sky, or hacking off mobile suit parts – is that you have to hang out with other people who have nothing to do as well.

_This sucks, _Yzak grumbled inwardly as he leaned back his head on the seat at the back of the van, crammed in an area that left no personal space at all with Dearka and Milly.

Why was he in a van? It all started early in the morning after the Cagalli- confessions that Zala had a _"way with his tongue". _

Captain Murrue Ramius had dropped by to visit along with Kisaka.

Everyone was ecstatic. It appears that it was the first time they had seen the young Captain since the cease-fire. Yzak couldn't care any less. But no one would miss those eyes, that had they not been that puffy from crying, would have been beautiful. He had heard of the Captain's tragic fate, when Mwu La Fllaga, that man who had been piloting the Strike, and apparently, the Captain's lover, died so that others in the Archangel might live.

Ramius, however, did not bother everyone with details of the sad love affair - _thank god! _– when they asked. The girls all tried to say a word or two to console her, but the boys, Kira, Kazui and Sai specifically, being soldiers under her command before, did not know what to say. Even Dearka, who had his share of time on the vessel Ramius commanded, was speechless. Ramius didn't seem to mind.

"Let's not think about sad thoughts from now on. They have died for us to live, and we should be grateful," the Captain had said and with a flip of her wavy brown hair, she flocked them all down the Women's RQ to the van parked in the front of the building in Second where Kisaka was waiting in the driver's seat.

The seating arrangements inside the 12-seater van were as follows. Ramius was on the passenger seat next to Kisaka, Athrun, Cagalli and Sai were in the second row of seats, Kira, Lacus and Kazui on the middle row, and whoop-dee-doo! Yzak ended up in the rear with Milly and Strawberry boy.

Actually, it was rather amusing at first. It was the very first time he had seen everyone, including himself, out of their uniforms. They, the boys were in jeans and tee-shirts or sweaters, Lacus was in denim shorts and a matching jacket, Milly was wearing what looked like a skirt over a pair of shorts. Cagalli, however, was dressed pretty much how Athrun was dressed. Well, actually, they were wearing matching sweaters, so go figure. Lacus and Kira, on the other hand, seemed to be enjoying their time when it came to accessories. The Freedom Pilot and the former songstress were both wearing blue baseball caps. Lacus must have picked it out on the last two days they didn't meet, because as far as he could remember, Kira didn't shop for anything except for the basic necessities.

He was really enjoying himself watching Dearka try to start a conversation with Miriallia. You see, there really wasn't anything wrong with what Dearka was doing, except that he can't seem to hold on to the girls interest that long. After a while of amusing himself with Dearka making a complete idiot of himself, he got tired and sulked as he looked at the passing greenery out the window.

And now, with their newfound freedom, and fashion, they were off to Tento Land, wherever and whatever that may be. Really, Yzak didn't care.

Until Murrue explained what it really was.

Kira looked up from the book Lacus was reading and leaned forward to talk to Murrue. "What's Tento Land anyway, Murrue?"

The Captain swung her arm over her seat and smiled widely. "It's a recreational park. Pretty much wide-open spaces for golf and other stuff. Lots of trees. There's a barbecue area and a campsite. Don't worry, we won't be spending the night. I just thought that you'd like to go out. Dellit told me all about the sights here in Abashiri and the towns around it. And since it's almost summer, I just thought that we should all go out and have fun. I heard that we can rent bikes there."

Yzak felt his heart sink. _Bikes?_

Yamato was excited, the imbecile. "All right! It's been a while now… I hope I could still ride one."

Lacus unconsciously pitched in to Yzak's misery. "Of course, Kira. Once you learn how to ride one, you'll never forget."

Cagalli was also excited. "Yay! Let's race, Athrun."

Athrun nodded. "I bet I can beat you."

Dearka, the only one knowledgeable of his **_deepest, darkest _**secret, or so he had termed it, merely glanced at him sideways, wisely not saying anything.

Yzak swallowed. _Bikes…? We can rent bikes there…?_

Dearka nudged him with his elbow. "You okay?"

"Why shouldn't I be?" Yzak hissed, elbowing him back a little harder.

Dearka sneered. Yzak wanted to claw his eyes out. "You know exactly what I mean, buddy."

Yzak shot him a death glare. "No, I _don't know what you mean_."

The Buster pilot cackled evilly, then placed his hands behind his head and said loudly. "**_Oh, what did you say, Yzak? You said you want to dare Kira, Athrun and me to a bike race when we get there?"_**

**Yzak felt like the world suddenly stopped spinning. **

**Kira looked over his seat and nodded vigorously. "Wow! That's a great idea!"**

**Athrun, too, was stoked. "Mmmm. A dare, huh?"**

**Yzak tried to protest, but when he realized he sounded like he was whining, he tried to compose himself. "I have better things to do than play a childish game with you."**

**Lacus turned to face him. "Oh, Yzak, come on. It's just a friendly game. Maybe if we put a little incentive on it, it'll be more exciting."**

**Kazui quickly piped in. "I think that's a good idea."**

**Sai seconded. "Yeah!"**

**It was then did Yzak realize he hated Kazui and Sai. Not only was he stuck with them in a pad, but now they're pitching in on his unwanted humiliation in front of these immature people! And to think they actually helped him in humiliating Dearka before.**

**The girls were squealing excitedly now.**

**Cagalli, however, was the one who thought of the incentive. She was always the mastermind of all that is evil and naughty in this group. "Listen, I got an idea. What if, the guy who reaches the finish line first gets a kiss from the girl they choose."**

**Again with the kissing. It was starting to get annoying. Dearka, on the other hand, was all over the idea. So, the idiot wanted to get a kiss from little miss Milly, eh?**

**Yzak crossed his arms over his chest and smiled sardonically. "Attha, if you want to kiss Athrun, just do it." He stuck his tongue out and wiggled it at the princess, whose face was becoming red. "You do it all the time, anyway."**

**As always, girls stick with each other so Lacus and surprisingly, even Milly agreed. "I think it's a good enough incentive."**

**Kira was scratching his head shyly. Lacus smiled up at him happily. "Good luck, Kira."**

**"Why not?" With this, Milly turned to Dearka somewhat shyly. "Will you win?"**

**Dearka, having been caught off-guard by her question, blinked in amazement. "I… I don't know. Do you want me to win?"**

**Milly blushed. "I don't know…"**

**Yzak wanted to rip his hair out. "Why on earth do I have to join? There's no one among you I'd want to kiss!"**

**With this, Murrue laughed. "Well, if you really want to join, you can kiss me."**

**Yzak shuddered. "No thanks, lady."**

**Everyone laughed.**

**Yzak's heart sank even lower. _Now what? I don't know how to ride a bike…_**

 **_--  --  -- _**

They arrived at Tento Land half an hour later. If Yzak had not been so nervous, he might have actually appreciated the place. It was so broad and green, with tall trees that were getting ready for summer, as they shed their pink and yellow flowers, carpeting the ground with a colorful mosaic. Except for the parking lot and the reception area, which were made of stone and cement, everything was nature. There was a light, cool breeze that was blowing from the north. In a matter of days, Spring would be leaving.

All of these really would have been appreciated. But _nooooo_, Dearka had to make him do this, all because he wanted to get back at him. And now, everyone was going to know that he, Yzak Jule, was so pathetic that he didn't even know how to ride a bike.

Feeling weak and slightly nauseous, Yzak lagged behind. The only thing that made him feel uncomfortable was the fact that Miriallia stayed with him as others went in the lobby to rent bicycles.

This was the first time Yzak had ever been alone with this girl. She didn't really talk that much, since her personality was always overpowered by Athrun's wild girlfriend. Remarkably, she initiated the conversation.

"You don't know how to ride a bike?" she asked, somewhat quietly and shyly.

Yzak almost fell to the floor. "What - ?" _Dearka! I'll kill him! _"He told you didn't he?"

Milly blinked her eyes in surprise. "Huh? Oh, no. I just kind of guessed because you're really edgy and a little pale. Why didn't you just tell them that you don't know how to?"

Yzak cringed. He'd rather die. Turning away, he squatted on the ground and harumphed. "It's none of your business, Haww."

This made the girl laugh. An unexpected reaction. He stared at her. "What's so funny?"

She covered her mouth politely. "Oh, I'm sorry. It's just that you're a Coordinator, and well, your abilities are far greater than ours, so I was thinking that maybe you can pull this off."

Yzak frowned. "I don't know. Maybe I can do it, but I think it's purely psychological."

With this, Milly squatted next to him, folding her arms around her knees. "Don't worry. You'll be fine. Just keep your weight on the seat and not on the handles. That way, you can turn. But then again, this is a race so al you have to do is move forward as fast as you can. Look straight ahead, and pedal fast. Do you get it?"

Yzak swallowed. He really was not feeling well. "No."

Milly sighed. "It's really easy. You can do this."

The Duel pilot stared at her, confused. "Why are you helping me anyway?"

The soft-spoken girl shrugged and got to her feet. "Because you look like you need it."

_Oh, God._

The others came back rolling along several bikes with them.

Yzak got to his feet when Kazui and Sai personally handed him his bike. It was not a large bike. Blue, it was. Not that it mattered. A bike was a bike. No matter what color it was, he would never be able to ride it.

Milly leaned closer to the bike and nodded. "Go on, Yzak. Give it a try."

Kira, Athrun and Dearka each came with their own bikes. Kira was talking with Lacus and asking if he could still get a kiss even if he didn't win. Cagalli and Athrun were kidding around as usual. Dearke, however had his eyes narrowed at him. At first he thought his friend was giving him the _you're-dead _look, until he realized he was wrong. He was staring at him because his precious Miriallia was standing so close to him as she examined the bike.

Immediately jumping away, he chuckled to himself. _Oh, how cute! Dearka is marking his territory already, the dog. _Frowning to himself, his mind went back to the bike in front of him.

Dumb and Dumber, Sai and Kazui, unlike everyone else, somehow caught the electric current that passed between him and Dearka over the unaware girl. Yzak shivered inwardly. The looks on their faces, like a fox that had just spotted its prey, made them smile meaningfully.

Yzak knew they were up to no good. As usual.

He looked up when he saw Kira going in circles around Lacus on his bike. Watching closely, he grabbed the bike by the handles, and unknowingly brushed Milly's hand in the process.

Dearka went flying to her side, pulling her to him possessively. The Buster pilot tried to make an excuse. "Watch it, Miriallia. Yzak with a bike, you won't know what'll happen."

Yzak snickered. He knew that it wasn't his lack of experience with a bike that scared him. It was because he didn't want anyone near his girl.

Milly innocently looked at Dearka's hand holding her arm, then his face. Yzak could swear he saw Milly smile. Out of amusement, or out of understanding, he did not know.

He tried to get comfortable with his bike, trying to _feel _how it works. It seemed easy enough. _ But how could they ride on such thin wheels?_

No sooner was he on the bike did Sai and Kazui immediately call for them to line up in the grassy expanse a little further away from the parking lot. It was really nice there, and for some weird reason, Yzak was relaxed. _Just keep your balance… Look straight ahead… pedal fast… Just keep your balance… Look straight ahead… pedal fast… Just keep your balance… Look straight ahead… pedal fast…_

He hardly realized the three other boys being showered by words of support from their girls. And yeah, he was kind of happy that Milly was saying good luck to Dearka. He knew that Milly was looking forward for his friend's victory.

After a few more minutes, Murrue pointed to the solitary tree about easily over fifty yards away and raised a white handkerchief. "First one to that tree wins. On your mark. Get set. GO!"

And they were off. What surprised Yzak was he actually got the bike working, as opposed to what he expected; falling flat on his face on the first two pumps on the pedal. His body just went along with the bike, as it would with a Mobile Suit.

The next surprise came when he realized he was actually winning! He saw Kira and Athrun lag behind him somewhere in between the track, and he found himself neck and neck with Dearka.

His friend's eyes widened at the discovery. "What the…? I thought you didn't know how to ride a bike!"

Not being able to resist, Yzak suddenly felt mean. "Yeah, well, Milly taught me. Gave good advice and all that."

Dearka did not like that. "Eat my dust, Jule!"

And with that, the Buster Pilot tore his bike like a madman across the grass, sending dirt flying everywhere. But Yzak was not done yet. This was his revenge! He will get back at Dearka for even _thinking _of embarrassing him!

With a vengeance, Yzak sped after him. He could hear the girls cheering them on. He smirked as he spat out a blade of grass that slipped into his mouth. _Oooooh, sweet, sweet revenge!_

The next thing that happened was the gift the heavens gave him.

He heard Milly scream her cheer. "**_GO DEARKAAAAAAAA!!!!_**"

_The icing on the cake! _Dearka, at the sound of his oh so precious Milly's voice, looked over his shoulder to see if she really did cheer for him. Bad idea. Having been distracted, Dearka's bike wavered and the next moment, he came toppling over and dropping to the ground, rolling twice or thrice on the grass. And to think he was almost at the tree…

_Hehehehehe!_

Yzak could already feel it as he sped towards the nearing tree. He had never felt this fulfilled in his life! However, his elation only lasted a moment, when he discovered the one thing that Milly forgot to teach him.

How to hit the breaks.

And with one swift motion…

_**BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANG!!!!!!!**_

Yzak felt everything go blank and before the world faded, the last thing he could remember was a head-on collision with the finish line's trunk.

 **_--  --  -- _**

Yzak woke up with three pairs of big eyes staring down at him. Blinking about twice or thrice, trying to focus his vision, he groaned. Everything was spinning violently.

"Is he alive?" he heard a female voice that he recognized as Lacus.

"I'd be surprised if he is," said a voice that belonged to Cagalli.

"If he's alive, can I kill him?" Dearka's voice.

Then he started to remember everything. The race, the bet, the agonizing screech of metal against wood, of skull against wood. Hie groaned even louder when he sat up with effort. He felt someone help him sit up. He noticed he was still next to the tree he had just rammed, and it was Miriallia who helped him, and was now propping his back up against the trunk.

Suddenly, Kazui's face was inches from his. "That was the coolest thing I've ever seen in my life! The second being Dearka's major wipeout."

Dearka scowled. He had a few grass stains on his tee-shirt. He didn't look that hurt. Yzak pushed Kazui away, the act sending jolts of pain through his skull. Cagalli peered down at him again. "Congrats, Yzak. You win. Although I kind of feel sorry for you, coz you really won't be gaining nothing from it, as you have no one here you want to kiss…"

"I do. I have someone I want to kiss."

At that everyone gasped.

"Who?" Lacus was surprised.

Athrun suddenly had his arm around Cagalli.

Cagalli laughed heartily. "Like he'd want to kiss me." Her eyes flickered dangerously towards him. "He'd be kissing cold steel first."

Kira was a little protective, too. He went near Lacus, and although he didn't do or say anything, it was obvious no one was gonna steal kisses from his songstress.

Yzak grinned. He looked over the kneeling girl right next to him and nodded. "Pucker up, Milly." And without warning, he grabbed the startled girl by the arm and dipped her head low, so she ended up lying on his lap. Everyone was so shocked that no one, not even Dearka, who looked like he was going to faint, was able to move.

Yzak leaned lower and Milly squealed. "Suck in your lips," he whispered. "Hurry."

Milly - smart girl – caught up quick. Sucking in her lips, she closed her eyes tightly. Yzak smirked. Covering her cheek with his hand, he pressed his thumb over her mouth and kissed his finger in a superficial smooch. To everyone, especially to Dearka, it looked awfully real.

When he pulled away, he had a satisfied grin on his face at the sight of Dearka's strawberry-red face. He was so jealous! Milly immediately scuttled away and hid behind Sai and Kazui, who looked really satisfied. Had Yzak not been this happy with himself for having extracted revenge from his friend, he would have easily thought that Kazui and Sai were planning something.

Yzak chuckled as he gingerly got to his feet. Cagalli was ecstatic. "Way to go, Jule!"

Kira and Athrun relaxed and they slipped away from their women to see if Yzak was all right. But before any of them could get to him, he did not see the fist that was barreling down towards his face.

One moment, he was standing, the next, he was staggering backward. Dearka had punched him across the face!

Yzak was furious, or at least he pretended to be. Deep down, he knew he had done his part for his friend and at the same time, got back at him. "That hurt, man! What was that for?"

Dearka stared at him, his fists clenched so tightly that they were almost white. "I thought I saw an insect on your face. I wanted to squash it, but I found out it was only your mouth." With that, he stalked away, fuming.

Everyone looked after Dearka as he walked away furiously, then they stared at Yzak.

Milly nervously stepped from behind Sai and swallowed hard. "What was that about, Yzak? You got your friend mad… Why did you pretend that you kissed me?"

Yzak stared at the girl and snorted. "Let's just say, it's an incentive."


	10. Phase 10:Bikinis, Virgins & Volleyballs

**_Author's Note: Once again thanks to everyone who read and reviewed my fic. It really means a lot to me that you like it. So this chapter is for all you KiraxLacus, AthrunxCagalli and DearkaxMilly fans out there! Just a bit of fluff for you._**

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Seed. **_

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

**_June 27, AW Early Evening_**

"You did it on purpose, didn't you, Kira?" Lacus asked as she carefully balanced herself on the narrow stone benches lining the path that led up to the hill of trees. Kira walked right beside her down on the ground, arms loosely in his side, ready to catch her is she missed a step.

Kira looked up at her questioningly from under his cap. He looked positively adorable in it. "Did what on purpose?"

Lacus continued with her little game and giggled. "You and Athrun, both of you lost on purpose, because you wanted Dearka to win."

Kira laughed, stretching his arms over his head. "That was the plan. But Yzak completely wrecked it. And to think I thought he didn't know how to ride a bike, with how he was acting and all. Oops, careful, Lacus. You might fall." He extended his hand up to her, which she willingly took, but still continued with her little pilgrimage on the stone benches.

"Well, a wake-up call is a wake-up call. Do you think Dearka will take the hint?"

"I really don't know, Lacus."

The songstress sighed as she looked up at the tall trees around them. The sun was an orange ball in the horizon, making its ceremonious descent down the mountains to the west. They had been walking for hours already. After the race and Yzak's victory claim, Murrue had rented out a barbecue spot and had purchased tons of meat and vegetables for a cookout, Japanese style. It was a good meal, with everyone – well, except Dearka – happy of that day. When they had finished eating and cleaning up, Kira had asked Lacus if she wanted to go for a walk. Lacus had said yes, and hours later, they were there, still on the path leading up to the unknown.

Kira held her hand and squeezed, making her stop.

"What is it, Kira?" she asked, hopping off the bench and looking up at his face. He was staring back to where they had come from.

"Maybe we should go back. It's getting dark. We might get lost." Kira gazed down at her, and when he realized he couldn't see her eyes because of her cap, he tilted the thing up and peered into her baby blues.

Lacus giggled. Kira Yamato was the typical gentleman who would sacrifice his own happiness for the happiness of others. Lacus knew he wanted to explore the hill more, but was worried about her that's why he's proposing they go back. Climbing back up on the stone bench, she shook her head and pointed to the path beyond the curb. "There's still light out, Mr. Yamato. If we walk really fast, we'll be able to go down the other side of this hill and just go around it on the way back." She turned to him and smiled. "Besides, I do not mind getting lost, so long as we get lost together."

At that, Kira blushed and tried to hide his face under the visor of his cap. "If you really want to, then I guess we can still go further."

And they resumed their walk with Lacus still playfully hopping on the benches. Kira held her hand gently but firmly. Neither of them said anything, and it sort of made Lacus nervous. Kira was so quiet. He had always been quiet. It was probably his silence that made her grow fonder of him as each day passed.

Kira didn't know how much he meant to the songstress, how she had been holding her breath the whole time he would launch from the Archangel in his Freedom. She had always tried to hide it, her worry, because she had to be tough and strong for the people she led. She could remember having taken care of the Freedom pilot back to health after his and Athrun's face-off. Kira had never known how much her heart ached for him, seeing him so weak in bed, injured and depressed over everything then. He was such a sad boy, living such a sad life.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

Lacus blinked herself back to reality and noticed that she was, indeed, staring at Kira's handsome face. She laughed out loud. She had mastered hiding her feelings to everyone, masking her embarrassment with a giggle or two. "Nothing, Mr. Yamato. I was just thinking."

"Of what?"

Lacus shrugged. "Of you."

It was Kira's turn to laugh. "Me? You're thinking about me?"

"What's wrong with thinking about you?"

He thought for a moment then frowned. "Nothing, I guess." The next thing he did made Lacus scream out loud. He pulled her by the hand sharply and she ended up toppling over from the bench with a loud "**_KIRA!!!!_**" escaping from her mouth.

But Kira knew what he was doing. Scooping her up in his arms and twirling her in circles as she held on to his neck, giggling, he laughed with her.

"Kira! Kira, put me down! I'm getting dizzy..." Lacus cried out, out of breath.

The Freedom pilot shook his head. "Say the magic word first."

"Please!"

"Wrong magic word!"

"What?! I don't know the magic word!"

Kira kept on spinning her around. "Try to guess."

Lacus was really getting dizzy. "Uhm... Chocolate chip cookies!"

With this, Kira stopped and stared at her in bewilderment. "Chocolate chip cookies?"

Lacus gratefully climbed down from Kira's arms and steadied herself on his shoulder. "Well, you told me to guess, and I did. You stopped anyway. So tell me. Why is 'chocolate chip cookies' the magic word?"

Kira blinked at her, then shook his head. "That wasn't the magic word, but it was so spontaneous it made me stop." He started walking up the path again, pulling Lacus with him. "Come on. Let's get moving. I wonder what's on the other side?"

Lacus clung to his arm, her world still spinning. "Hey, Kira?"

"Hmmm?"

"When will we go to the beach?"

Kira looked over his shoulder at her for a second then turned back to the path. "Summer. First day. I have to ask around how to get there first. What do you want to do there anyhow?"

"Collect shells," she said promptly, happily skipping along beside the really solemn boy. "And dig my feet in the sand. And wear a bikini - "

Kira missed a step, stammering as he spoke. "A- a b-bikini?"

"Yes. It would be nice to feel the sun on your skin. I had always wanted to sunbathe."

Lacus watched as Kira shook his head vigorously, as if trying to shake something off. "Yeah. Sunbathing is good."

Lacus narrowed her eyes as she gazed out into the setting sun that had painted the sky a fiery red. "Look, Kira. The sun is saying good night."

They stopped to watch the orange ball hide its proud face behind the mountain.

Lacus sighed. "Beautiful..." she murmured.

Kira looked down at her fondly. "You're beautiful."

The remark startled her. Kira was actually being romantic...? She smiled up at him. "Thank you." Then, standing on tiptoe, she planted a quick kiss on his cheek.

_Take your time, Mr. Yamato. I'll be waiting for you._

And they went on their way through the trees and over the hill.

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

Cagalli was a liar and a hypocrite. She had made Lacus and Milly believe that when it came to relationships, she was an expert. But the truth was, she was as scared as shit when she and Athrun were alone, afraid of what he would do, or say to her, afraid that she would not know how to respond.

She had insisted that they follow Kira and Lacus and spy on them when she saw they had slipped away after the meal. But they ended up getting lost through the trees. Or maybe they really were not lost. Maybe Athrun did this on purpose...

Cagalli flopped down on the protruding root on the ground and let out a tired sigh as she saw the sun disappear to the west. They had been walking for hours and still no Kira and Lacus.

Athrun squatted down in front of her and tilted her chin up to look into her eyes. "My little princess tired?"

Cagalli laughed good-naturedly. "Give me a minute. That was a steep hill there."

The blue-haired boy nodded then sat down next to her on the root. "So, let's talk."

"About what?"

"You and me."

Cagalli was stumped. "You and me? What's there to talk about?"

Athrun touched his chest and acted like he was shot. "Ouch! That hurt. What's not to talk about? You and me, Cagalli? Don't you have anything to say?"

Cagalli thought for a moment, then brightened. "Oh! Here's one: I'm sorry."

Athrun was confused. "You're _sorry?_"

She nodded. "Yes. For embarrassing you in front of everyone, you know, about your _skills _when it came to kissing."

This made Athrun laugh out loud. "That? No! Don't be sorry. Those guys were really just envious. I really don't mind. Well, except that they won't let me forget about it, I pretty much don't mind them knowing where we stand."

Cagalli looked at him oddly. "So you don't care if they make fun of you?"

"Because I'm a good kisser? Hell no!"

Cagalli socked his arm painfully. "And where did that _I'm-a-good-kisser _come from?"

Athrun naughtily retaliated. "Oh, I think it was from that brunette I met the other day while me and the guys were shopping."

This time, the princess socked his arm harder. "Haha. Very funny, Zala." She tried to hit him again, but Athrun caught her fist and kissed it quickly. She tried to slap him with the other hand, but he caught that, too and lovingly placed it on his cheek.

"Running out of hands, Attha?" he teased.

Cagalli sneered. "Still have my feet." And with that, she extended her left leg. She was meaning to shove him on the chest with her shoe, just to make him back off, but in the process of moving her leg, her knee caught his jaw in the most painful way possible, and in a moment, Athrun was keeling over with a grunt, the impact making him let go of her hands. He fell on his back on the trodden grass, sending fallen dead leaves flying everywhere with a pained "**_OOOF!_**"

"Athrun!" she gasped in panic at her fallen beloved. She fell on all fours and crawled to him in a daze. _Just great, Attha. Kill him while he's just trying to be the perfect boyfriend._

The Justice pilot had his eyes shut tightly, mouth tight and a gurgling sound was coming out of his mouth.

_Oh, God, what have I done?_

Leaning down close to his face, she swallowed. "Athrun? Baby, are you okay?"

The next thing that happened caught her off-guard. Athrun suddenly lunged at her with a loud "**_GOTCHA!_**", grabbing her around the waist and pinning her arms to her body. Once again, his strength impressed her. She couldn't even move.

They rolled on the ground a couple of times, laughing. Well, Athrun was laughing, Cagalli was swearing loudly and profusely.

Athrun stopped his game with him on top of her, a very naughty glint in his dark eyes. "You'll pay for that, Cagalli Yula Attha."

Cagalli laughed nervously. "I didn't mean to knee you on the jaw, Athrun. It was an accident. Well, I meant to kick you, but - "

Her words were drowned by Athrun's lips pressing on hers. And once again, she felt like she was melting. No one – and she believed this truly – can kiss a girl like Athrun can...

And this proved what a hypocrite she really is. He overwhelmed her with his 'tongue skills' again, and she was anything but comfortable with it...

Athrun ran a hand through her hair and moaned in the most seductive way he could, his other hand running down her arm.

_Oh, God, help me... _she prayed as Athrun slipped his hand under her sweater, tickling her navel. She was one big nerve. Everything he did made her feel uncomfortably good...

"Athrun..." Cagalli muffled in between kisses that were getting more and more aggressive each minute. "Athrun, wait..."

"Can't wait anymore, Baby... " he murmured, his lips dancing to her ears then to her slender neck. "Athrun Zala wants you too much..."

Cagalli laughed nervously as she felt Athrun's other hand slowly massaged her neck as he continued with his conquest in making her feel like a natural woman. "Uhm,, Athrun...? I don't think we should be doing this..."

Athrun didn't listen. He just kept on going down and down. He was the horny teenager that he is, and Cagalli was not sure if she was liking it or not. "Why shouldn't we? I'm here. You're here. Oh, God, Cagalli, I want you soooo badly..."

With this, Cagalli thought she was going to explode from embarrassment. Athrun _wanted _herIn a sexual way...!

Cagalli pushed Athrun away gently. "Athrun, no."

"Oh, yes." The Justice pilot went on with his onslaught.

"No." Cagalli said firmly, pushing him away again.

And he stopped. He was looking at her with a look that was a mixture of disappointment and confusion. "What's wrong, Cagalli? Don't you... don't you feel the way I do about you?"

"No! I mean, yes!. I mean... Oh, Athrun, you know I do. Heck, God knows I do... but... " Her hand flew to her neck where Athrun had been kissing her and felt a blush heat her cheeks. She didn't know that Athrun was like this at all... And the problem was, she didn't know what to do. Should she be happy? Or mad? Or...

Athrun sighed as he sat on his behind on the ground and reached out to Cagalli, holding her hand. "I'm sorry, baby... I didn't mean to force you into anything." He hit his head hard, and embarrassed look on his flushed face. "Stupid Athrun. Bad me. Bad me. Dammit! I Really am sorry, Cagalli..."

Cagalli stared at him ruefully, a small smile playing on her lips. _Well, I should be happy, right? My boyfriend finds me sexy, right? _She laughed and pulled Athrun to her in an embrace. "I love you, Athrun. But next time, we'll get a room. Somehow, doing anything in the wilderness doesn't appeal well with me."

Athrun leaned his forehead on hers and looked into her eyes sadly. "Oh, princess. Will you forgive this virgin for having tried to press his luck on you?"

Cagalli burst out laughing. "**_YOU'RE STILL A VIRGIN!?_**"

Athrun didn't like that. "And I suppose you're not?"

Cagalli stared at him dryly, then blinked. "Let's not talk about that right now, shall we?"

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

Dearka raised his face from his hands and looked at Miriallia as she ran around with Murrue, throwing away the paper plates and the left-overs of their meal. He had planted himself on the grass next to the still live coals of the barbecue and was hating Yzak's existence. The man had actually KISSED his girl!

He could not understand what he was feeling. Never in his life did he expect that a girl could actually do this to him; making him miserable for simply being there. He could remember the days when nothing else mattered, that staying alive in the battle field was his top priority.

Everything changed when he saw her. He knew he was an obnoxious jerk then, picking on Miriallia when she was hurting the most. But now... Shit, what a softy he has become. And it's all because of her...

_Miriallia..._

"Hello."

"Ahhhhh!" Dearka jumped in surprise as he saw Miriallia peer down at him, her hands on her legs. _Her legs... Miriallia has nice legs..._

Hitting himself for even staring at her legs, he looked away. "Miriallia. Hello. What's up?" Yes this was a good start. He had said three sentences without sounding like a moron.

"May I sit with you?" she asked.

"With me? You want to sit with me?"

She nodded. "If you don't mind."

Dearka hurriedly scooted over the grass and brushed the grass hurriedly. "I don't mind. What's up?"

She smiled. "The stars."

Dearka blinked and found out what she meant when he tilted his head back and gasped in awe. There, overhead, were billions and billions of pinpricks of light. "Oh, wow! There are so many stars!"

Miriallia giggled as she, too, raised her eyes to the heavens. "Isn't it weird to be down here, when we used to be up there?"

Dearka glanced at her. She had a dreamy look in her eyes, those stars all melting into her eyes. "I suppose. Say, where do you think we were then?"

"It doesn't matter to me. So long as we're here now."

Dearka scratched his head. How was a guy supposed to respond to that? Man, he sucked when it came to conversations...

"Dearka, listen," Miriallia said. She didn't have to. Dearka would always listen to her, even when she wasn't saying anything.

"What is it?" he asked.

"Can't we talk about something?"

Dearka was surprised at her request. "Sure. Anything you like."

She smiled sadly. "That's the problem. There isn't anything we can talk about. Haven't you realized it yet? We always end up in an uncomfortable silence. Why?"

He had never really asked himself that before, but maybe now that he knew it bothered her, it would be better if they try to fix it. But how? "Well, I guess I really don't know."

Miriallia smiled and suddenly produced what looked like one of Lacus' books. "Here."

Dearka tilted his head to the right and asked, "A book?"

"Uh-huh. It's entitled the 'Little Mermaid'. Have you read it?" She scanned the pages slowly and looked up at him. God, she was beautiful! The gentle orange glow of the coals made her face somewhat look younger and sweeter.

Dearka shook her head, trying hard not to stare. "I haven't."

She was excited. She suddenly rushed over to his side, her knees brushing his. He flushed and thanked the stars that it was dark enough for his face to be hidden. "Great. Now we can talk about something."

"But I haven't read it before."

"I can tell you all about it."

The Buster Pilot was a little doubtful. But he leaned near her and peered into the book anyway. She smelled so good, like freshly picked strawberries. He swore to God he loved that fruit already.

But Miriallia wouldn't talk about the Little Mermaid. When he looked at her face, she was smiling. "Hey, are you all right?" he asked her.

Miriallia raised her eyes to him and – _screamed???_

Dearka knew soon enough. Out of nowhere, a volleyball suddenly materialized and zoomed towards him so fast he couldn't even react to it. One moment, he was sitting upright, the next the ball hit right smack on the face, causing him to fall down on his back, his cheek and nose stinging. It pretty much was as painful as falling off his bike, but not as painful as seeing Yzak, - that snake – kiss his girl.

"Ooooh!" He groaned as the ball rolled off his face. It was replaced by Miriallia's angelic face looming inches from his. He found himself grinning crazily. _I have died and gone to heaven._

Suddenly, he was sucked back down to hell n earth when Miriallia's face disappeared and was replaced by Yzak, Kazui and Sai's faces. Yzak was smirking at him.

Kazui held up his fingers.. "How many fingers am I holding up?" he asked.

Dearka groaned even more. _They have to get their faces off of mine. Where is Miriallia?_

Yzak laughed out loud. "Sorry man. We were playing ball and I spiked it too hard and it hit you. Anyways, see you around." With that, he left with the ball and Kazui and Sai who were casting him sorry glances. They left, finally, and he felt someone picking his head up. The next thing he knew, his spinning head was resting on Miriallia's lap.

Two Miriallias were looking down at him. Both were beautiful, both were chuckling quietly. After a while the two Miriallias merged into one and spoke. "Are you all right?"

_Am I ever... _"My head hurts..."

She shrugged. "That was a spike from Yzak. I don't doubt you. Just stay still. You'll be fine."

Dearka closed his eyes and when he opened them again, he saw Miriallia had the book in her hands and she began to read.

"Once upon a time, there was a mermaid. She was the loveliest mermaid in all the seas and she had the most beautiful voice..."

Dearka looked up into the sea of stars and then dizzily felt a warm fuzzy feeling inside as his angel sontinued to read from her book. He had to listen, so that they'd have something to talk about, when he felt better.

_I didn't know volleyballs were heaven sent..._he thought as he contentedly lied there on her lap...

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

_**A/N: There you have it, people. This, now, is really not funny, so I put in a lot of fluff! Yaaaay for fluff!**_

**_Oh, and the answer to Amnesia's question about Yzak winning? Kira and Athrun planned to lose, and Dearka got really distracted. LOL!_**

_**Oh, and someone asked me a really cool question, asking about how this story will end. I've been thinking about it really hard, and I kind of have something in mind now, but the problem is, how many will the chapters be. I was thinking of maybe up until fifty or sixty, but that depends too, on what'll happen. Hehehehe! I'm just kind of moving along from one chapter to another, that's why.**_

**_But again, thanks for those hwho read and review my work! I love y'all!_**


	11. Phase 11: Oh, Baby! My Baby!

**_Author's Note: Waaaaaaaaah!!! You didn't like Athrun in the last chapter!!! Oh, but I have to insist, though... You see, I had promised to myself that I will let the characters grow up in almost all the aspects I could think of when it comes to being a teenager, and in order to do that, I have to make at least ONE of them the horny teenager! LOL! I kind of was trying to pick out who among the guys should be the one to represent that part in life where he has to struggle with his hormones and, well, Athrun kind of fit the part. He's the only one with the relationship that seems ready to grow anyway. I mean, I can't see Kira doing anything naughty to Lacus. And Dearka? HAHAHAHA! That'll be the day! And then, of course, there's Yzak, but since he is currently unattached, he will not have an outlet, unlike Athrun having Cagalli, thus will probably make him run around hitting on pretty girls. Now we wouldn't want that, now would we? (Giggles!)_**

_**Oh, well, it is completely my fault. I should have warned you. )**_

**_So at the beginning of this chapter, I will let Athrun explain himself for being really, really bad to his girlfriend! _**

_**Anyway, please give this side of Athrun a chance. I PROMISE you it is for the better. PLEASE!!!! Do not worry. I will not sacrifice his relationship with Cagalli nor his image. This serves only to make him appear more human. )**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Seed.**_

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

_**June 27, AW Very Late in the Evening**_

**_"Oh, baby?"_** Dearka said after spewing a mouthful of water everywhere. Athrun looked at his face dryly and hid his head again under the throw pillows on the couch. Murrue had dropped them off at Twelfth after taking the girls to their dorm. The moment Athrun had entered their pad, he immediately crashed, belly-first on the couch, feeling absolutely disgusted with himself.

And because he felt really down, and he felt like he needed to talk to someone, he decided to tell Dearka all about it. Which he discovered only now as a bad idea. He told him of his sudden desire for Cagalli and what had happened in Tento Land. Luckily, Kira was still downstairs, talking to Murrue.

"**_Athrun Zala wants you too much, BABY!?_**" The Buster pilot blurted out tactlessly as he burst out laughing. "Man, you really are losing it!"

"Dearka, I would appreciate it if you do not laugh at my misfortune." Athrun snapped as he grabbed one pillow and blindly threw it at Dearka. Unfortunately, Dearka easily dodged it. He has become awfully wary of flying objects for some weird reason.

The Buster pilot chuckled richly. Athrun heard him approach the couch, and sat on the floor, peering under the pillows he was hiding under. "Sorry, man. I was just playing. Now, let's talk about this."

Athrun groaned and rolled on his back, facing the ceiling. "It was the weirdest feeling, Dearka. It's like, I was so into her. And I couldn't stop kissing her - "

"Did you take her breath away?"

Athrun glared at him for a moment then continued. "I've never been this out of control before. It's like I wanted to rip her clothes off..."

"Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Dearka raised his hands in front of him and shook his head. "I am the last guy you should be talking with right now. The only couple I know who comes close to yours is Kira and Lacus. Go talk to Kira."

The Justice pilot stared at him in disbelief. "Are you CRAZY? Have you any idea what you've just said? Cagalli is Kira's **_sister_**. If he found out I had come **_this _**close to **_raping _**his sister, he'll go into _Berserker-Mode _and finish me off in a heartbeat."

Dearka shrugged casually, as if they were talking about the weather, or what they'll be having for breakfast tomorrow. "Then talk to Lacus."

This time, Athrun was really frustrated. "Lacus is a girl, Dearka. I will not talk to a girl about guy stuff."

"What am I supposed to do, anyways? Heck, you're talking about third base. I haven't even begun swinging the bat."

This was true. But it still annoyed Athrun that the only one he could talk to happened to be someone who was even more inexperienced than he was...

Athrun sat up and put his head in his hands, rubbing his eyes tiredly. "I don't know how Cagalli felt about that one. She had to push me away just for me to stop. Man, I'm a beast."

"And? What exactly did you do?"

"I was on top of her I wouldn't stop kissing her, and I was about to take her sweater off - "

Dearka laughed, then when he realized what he was doing, he stopped. "Sorry, man. Look, I know that I may not be much of a help, but you have to take responsibility of your hormones from now on. Hehehe! Puberty boy!"

Athrun started to whine. "I know, I know. Argh! But why does it have to be this difficult? Why is it that life has suddenly become so complicated?"

Dearka blinked, as if trying to ponder on the thought, too. After a while, he frowned. "I don't know." The Buster pilot laid lay on his back on the carpeted floor, his arms behind his head. "And here I used to think riding a mobile suit was hard..."

Athrun moaned to the ceiling. Thoughts of his princess dancing around in a dress that left little to the imagination flooded his thoughts. "Every time I think about her, I feel like I'm going to go crazy. It's like I always want to kiss her. And touch her, and – **_KIRA!!!_**"

Kira had just entered the front door, his face covered up by that blue cap Lacus had given him. He had a long brown envelop under one arm. "Hello. Sorry it took me long. I asked Murrue for some stuff, then I heard Yzak screaming in their room. I went to check it out. They wouldn't let me in, but I assumed he was shouting at either Kazui or Sai."

_Big brother in the house. _Athrun thought as he tried to shove his problem away. Luckily he was used to setting aside emotions that did not necessarily need dealing with at the moment. "What's that in the envelop?"

Kira tiredly sat down on the round dining table and opened it carefully. "Brochures. Lacus wanted to go to the beach and so I'm scouting around for good spots. Are you okay, Athrun? You look pale." He busied himself with the colorful pamphlets, spreading them all over the table.

Athrun swallowed hard. "Me? I'm fine. Well, speaking of Lacus, where did you two head off to in Tento?"

Kira suddenly blushed. "Over the hill and through the trees."

Dearka looked over to him. "Really? That must be nice. I spent the entire evening lying on the ground because Yzak spiked a ball right into my face."

Athrun sneered. "Yeah, lying on Miriallia's lap."

Dearka sneered back at him. "What about you, Athrun? Where did you and Cagalli run off to?"

That shut him up. Cringing inwardly, he tried to change the subject. "So, next week we'll be going to University. What classes will you be taking?"

Kira blushed even more. "Good thing you mentioned that. I need a favor to ask you, Athrun..."

Right now, with his guilt nagging at him for having almost done the worst thing to his best friend's sister, he was willing to do anything. "Sure. What is it?"

It was obvious Kira was having a hard time with this. He took off his cap and scratched his mop of brown hair. "Well, Lacus is taking this subject... and I kind of want to take it up, too, because it's the only subject she's taking that I could stomach."

"What subject?"

"Health Education."

Dearka burst out laughing. He seemed to like to laugh a lot lately.

Kira looked offended. "It's better than taking Contemporary Literature. Or Modern Art. I'll fall asleep in class hours and I'd look like a lazy student to her."

Athrun gazed at his friend for a moment. "And Health Ed won't?"

"It's the best one in all the minor subjects..."

The thought made Athrun smile. Kira was like a child when it came to these kinds of things, and in a way, he was beginning to envy him. He felt like he was maturing too fast right now. Which was silly. He knew for a fact that it was about time he felt these things, but in a way, he wished he didn't. It didn't feel proper. It didn't feel right.

_Oh, sure. Now that she isn't here. But you turn into an animal when she's next to you. _Yes, he had always found himself wanting her to be alone with him, always looking for an excuse to sneak her into a deserted room and kiss her and touch her. What was bad is that he knew she was getting awfully uncomfortable at the situation, yet he still insists on showering her with more kisses and caresses.

He was a selfish bastard, that's what he was.

He fell back down on the couch, keeping his eyes to his friend. "You want me to take that class with you?"

Kira nodded enthusiastically. "Please?"

Dearka laughed even more. Kira turned to him. "Lacus said Miriallia is taking that class, too."

That made the Buster Pilot shut his trap.

Athrun nodded. "Sure, Kira. I'll take that class with you."

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

**_July 5, AW Morning_**

School came too early for Cagalli. Not that it mattered. Might as well get things over with, right?

Abashiri University stood about thirty minutes away by bus from their RQ and ten minutes from down town. As the princess hopped out of the bus after Lacus and Miriallia, her eyes immediately traveled up the tall square buildings crammed together on top of a low hill. Students in uniforms were everywhere. The guys were wearing black slacks with a matching dark coat, while the female students wore dark uniforms composed of a really short skirt and a hooded, long-sleeved top. She was beginning to hate it. There was no way they can make her wear something as short as that.

Lacus brushed back her bangs from her eyes and looked around nervously. "My. What a big campus."

"Move over," Yzak muttered as the boys lumbered out of the bus after them. Cagalli felt Athrun place a hand around her waist and she looked up to smile at him nervously. She couldn't help but feel a bit uneasy, what with how he acted in Tento Land.

He looked down at her with those eyes. Well, he did look like he was starting to behave now. Until she felt his hand run up her arm that made her shiver uncontrollably. She was about to swat it away, when Athrun pulled it away himself, cursing under his breath. He had been like that the whole week when they met. Always sensually trying to touch her, then would pull away as if burned.

She decided to ignore him. This was not a good day. Her boyfriend suddenly acting like a hormonally imbalanced freak was not helping.

The nine of them set off to the Guidance office. They had to ask around a lot for directions from a lot of people, and since Kazui and Sai kept on pushing Yzak to Miriallia and Dearka trying hard to show he didn't care, by pretending to accidentally trip Yzak while he was walking, the trip to the Guidance office was hell for Cagalli.

Honestly, she did not know what those two were up to, but right now, she wished they would stop. The moment they got to their destination, Yzak and Dearka were so deep into each other's throats that Kira, Athrun and yes, even Lacus was starting to feel uncomfortable.

Finally, they arrived at the office. It was empty when they got there, which was good. The last thing she wanted was to fall in line and wait. She sucked at waiting.

A woman in her mid-thirties entertained them from over the counter. Her name was Mrs. Kimberly Takano. She looked like half American-Asian, with brown hair and green, cat-like eyes.

Kira handed her their nine recommendation forms from Dellit when he reached the counter. "Good morning, Mrs. Takano. We're nine of the others Burin Dellit sent. We've faxed our requirements and we're to pick up our registration forms," he said.

The lady looked at the papers and nodded. "Oh, I have been expecting you." The lady had a kind voice and a kinder smile. Cagalli already liked her. Mrs. Takano handed them a sheet of paper and a pen

"Kindly look for your names and sign over it on the dotted line. After, you may take your seats over there by the couch and I shall give you your handbooks and registrations forms." With that, the kind old lady left them.

Kira handed Lacus the pen, as her name being under _C _for Clyne was on the first page. "Are you excited, Lacus?"

The songstress smiled at him cheerfully as she took the pen and wrote signed her name on the paper. "I am. A little nervous, too. But I'm glad we share at least one class."

Cagalli cringed inwardly as she remembered that _one class _she was referring to. She, Lacus and Miriallia were taking the class with Athrun, Kira and Dearka. She found the pattern annoying. It all began with Lacus, who was taking it genuinely because she really wanted to. Kira was taking it because Lacus was taking it. And since Kira asked Athrun to take it with him, well, he did. And because her boyfriend was taking it, Cagalli followed suit. When Miriallia found out that both girls signed up for the class, she did as well, and of course, wherever Milly went, Dearka followed.

It was a viscous cycle.

At first, Yzak had wanted to sign up for it just for the heck of it, but when he saw the subject definition and prospectus, he immediately laughed at Dearka for even thinking of signing in.

The first lesson was Family Planning.

Kira had gone pale at the thought and Athrun tried to act nonchalant, but deep down she knew his hands were itching to fax a dropping form immediately. Dearka was the only guy who didn't seem to care much.

Cagalli watched as Kira smiled at the songstress. "Yeah. At least we get to share a class, right?"

The princess sighed as she took a seat on the couch on the far wall while waiting for her turn to sign her name, propping her elbow on her knees, using her palm to support her chin. Athrun sat next to her, putting his arm around her shoulders.

"You okay?" He asked as he turned to her with a smile.

Cagalli nodded. "I guess. You?"

"Tired. I wasn't able to sleep well last night."

She looked at him. "Why? Are you sick?"

"Nope. I kept n missing you too much."

Feeling herself blush, she ran a hand through her hair and sighed. Maybe she had been overreacting. Maybe she was being unfair to Athrun for having thought of him that way. She leaned her head on his shoulder. "Athrun, I'm sorry."

"Huh? What for? Why do you keep on apologizing for something I'm not even aware of?"

This made her shrug. "Athrun, you love me, don't you?"

He laughed and tickled her side. "Of course I do. You know that. What's wrong?"

_What is wrong? _She shook her head. "Well, in Tento Land..."

He cut her off with a soft nudge. "Haven't I apologized enough for that, princess?"

She pulled away from him and narrowed her eyes. "Yeah, but all throughout the week, I'd feel uncomfortable, feeling as if you're... I don't know..."

The Justice pilot sighed and scratched his head. Cagalli didn't know if he was a little mad at her for bringing it up, but to her surprise, he nodded. "I know, Cagalli. I know what you mean. It's just that... Man, I don't know what's wrong with me. It's like -" he suddenly blushed. "I can't seem to get enough of you lately. I feel like I would always want to be around you, and then when I'm finally with you, I still want to get closer..."

_Is this a phase? _Cagalli wondered as she blinked in incredulity. Athrun Zala _does _want her that badly. _I thought he was going to take it slow... But then, why? It has to be just a phase, right? But I mean, it's not that I don't like the attention. It does kind of grow on you, with his occasional affection and cuddling. So what's wrong?_

She slapped his knee painfully. She was such a sadist. "You know what, Zala? I think this Family Planning Curriculum will do you good."

Athrun smiled, but his smile immediately turned into a frown when Dearka, who only now did they realize was sitting right behind Athrun on the couch, snorted loudly. Her boyfriend turned to the tan boy. "As far as I could remember, you're also taking this class."

Dearka smirked. "Yeah. But between the two of us, I don't have the testosterone problem."

Cagalli was amused when Athrun painfully tried to sock him. Dearka caught his fist.

The boy's reflexes honestly had improved over the week. She wondered why.

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Kira looked at the back of Lacus' pink head of hair as he sat there in the middle of the rows of chairs in Health Ed Class behind the songstress. Cagalli sat next to her left, and Athrun to the princess' left. Milly was beside Kira, Dearka, behind Milly. Since they were early, they were able to pick their seats.

The Freedom pilot looked around the class. He had easily observed that almost everyone there in the room were couples. There were equal numbers of boys as there were girls, and the guys all looked really bored, while the girls were looking forward to the class. Except for Dearka, who looked really excited and contented with looking at Miriallia's profile as she talked to Lacus, every guy there had a deadpanned expression there.

He smiled. That must mean that he and Lacus could easily be mistaken as a couple.

He was about to daydream more about it when Mrs. Takano entered the room with three boys in uniforms following behind her, lagging around strollers with medium-sized boxes on it.

Kira caught himself sitting up. Mrs. Takano would be teaching the class. This sort of made him feel good. For a certain reason, he liked the lady.

"Good morning class. I am Mrs. Kimberly Takano, and I will be teaching you Health Education. I am also the Guidance Councilor of Abashiri U, so if you need anything from me, I am in the Guidance office from eight to ten, and again from one to eight in the evening. So. Shall we begin?" she thanked the three and sent them off.

Mrs. Takano did not make them introduce themselves, thank heavens. She went straight to business.

"Now, don't tell the other teachers I told you this, but I really believe this is the most important subject you'd be taking," the teacher said with a smile.

"Why?" Cagalli asked. The question was really meant for herself, but she probably didn't notice that she had said it aloud.

The teacher turned to her. "Because, young lady, this subject will probably be the only thing commonly applied today." She raised one hand in the air. "In fact, I am happy to say that it's good that young couples have decided to take this subject. The administration had allotted us enough funds for the project I've been proposing for a long time now." With this, she took out one box from the stroller and placed it on the table in front of her. "The young generation has always interested me, because unlike me, they seem to move on their own pace, and because they move too fast, they end up missing their lives."

Kira was not sure where she was heading. But the lady explained. She opened the box but did not take whatever's in it. "This semester, we will learn the value of that with this." And with this, she took out the thing from the box.

It was a little life-sized baby doll. Kira frowned. _Huh?_

"A doll?" Cagalli blurted out again, this time meaning the question out loud.

The teacher smiled. "A baby. The statistics for teenage pregnancy today is outstanding. Each year, thousands of teenage girls end up getting pregnant, and thousands of teenage boys become fathers." She tweaked the doll's little toes and nodded at each and every one of them in the room. "I suppose I will not be asking you to choose your partners, since it is obvious you are all couples in this class."

Kira swallowed as Lacus turned to him shyly, looking over her shoulder.

Dearka was elated. Milly tried to avoid his gaze, but he could see she was really hiding a smile.

"Each pair will be given a doll to take care of for the first month of this semester. I want you to remember, however that Baby is not a toy. It is programmed to cry and bawl whenever you are doing something wrong." As an example, the teacher put the baby down on the table on its stomach. Everyone watched in silence, then after a few moments, the doll began to cry. Kira was impressed. It sounded like a real baby...

The teacher then picked it up and gently cradled it in her arms. The baby began to giggle. "Baby will not stop crying until you do the right thing for it to calm down. Take note that it is programmed to cry at times and you wouldn't know what's wrong, just like a real baby. This may be because s/he is lonely or hungry or any of the above. This means you are to put your life on hold to tend to your baby first. It is indicated in the handbook that comes along with the doll in the box. The chip inside the baby will record how many times baby has cried and for how long. Thus, your grades will depend on how well you've taken care of your baby.

"I have already talked to the nursing department and they will gladly lend you baby carriers and other baby accessories you will be needing for a whole month. Yes, you actually get to act like you're married and with a kid."

An excited murmur rose from the girls in the room.

As the teacher went on and on and on about the "baby", Kira felt himself getting redder and redder by the minute. _He _was going to act like he and Lacus have a gulp ! a child?! A baby?

He looked around and found Athrun, not red, but pale. Deathly pale. Dearka's eyes were wide open in disbelief. Their girls had different reactions however. Cagalli had a look of pure satisfaction for a reason that was unknown to Kira. She was looking at the Justice pilot quite meanly. Miriallia was blushing profusely. She tried to look at Dearka, but when their eyes met, they immediately looked away. Lacus, however, was actually smiling, a gentle look crossing her face.

_What are you thinking?_

He watched as the teacher passed around the dolls personally, asking each one to define their partner. The dolls were no longer in their boxes as they were distributed. being distributedWhen she came to Lacus, the songstress turned to him and said. "This is my partner, ma'am." And Kira sat up straighter.

The teacher smiled kindly to them both and handed Lacus the "Baby." She cradled in her arms like a pro. The doll giggled and made goo-goo noises.

"It's so cute, Kira!" Lacus exclaimed as she held it out for him to see. In fairness, the doll really was cute. Reaching out, he peeked under its little white diaper.

"Oh, it's a boy!" he laughed.

Lacus also peeked in and giggled. "Oh! You're right! Let's give him a name."

Kira smiled to himself. For someone who was used to having haros around, Lacus sure looked like she was having more fun with a baby. "What name?"

She smiled naughtily. "Kira Junior."

Kira smirked. "I will not name my child with such an ugly name."

He looked over Athrun and Cagalli, his sister holding the baby. He heard Cagalli say it was a girl and Athrun bent closer to look at it intently. "Mmmm. An nice piece of technology. It kind of comes close to my Haro and Torii, don't you think?"

Cagalli frowned at him. "Is that the way how a father should talk about his daughter?" With that, the baby started to cry.

Athrun was suddenly alarmed, and tried to tweak the doll's toes. "There, there, Cathrun..."

Cagalli snorted. "Cathrun? Where'd you get that?"

Athrun looked hurt. "From our names, silly. Oh, look! She stopped crying! You like that name, don't you? That's a good girl, that's a goooood girl!"

Kira had to laugh. Athrun actually sounded like a father!

Milly and Dearka were not as loud though. They just sat there, huddled together, looking down at the doll.

Dearka looked at Milly and smiled. "Oh, look. She has your eyes."

Milly blushed. "Oh, Dearka. Stop teasing me."

"But look. She has beautiful eyes. Like you."

She blushed even more.

Kira turned to his "wife." _Perhaps, this project could bring her closer to me... _he thought as she played with the doll's hair. "Hey, let me carry him."

"Okay," Lacus said as she handed the doll over carefully.

_Yes, perhaps this will bring him closer. And maybe it could give me an excuse to tell her how I feel..._

And then, the doll cried.

Kira panicked. "What am I doing wrong?" he asked worriedly. He tried to calm it down, but it didn't work. Lacus was starting to panic, too.

_Or maybe this father thing will just drive us up the wall, _he thought miserably as Lacus took back the doll, which immediately giggled at his "mother's embrace."

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_**A/N: Please leave a review for me, and please give Athrun a chance, okay? Pretty please!**_

_**Well, thanks for the reviews again and this chapter was typed in a hurry because of school and stuff. **_

_**Thank you again!!!**_


	12. Phase 12: It's A Guy Thing

Author's Note: Thank you for all the reviews, guys! I was surprised to see that I already have over 100 reviews!!! Ureshii!!! Also, thank you to King Arthur for giving the Horny Athrun a chance! and to Lomiothiel, although I am planning for Yzak to be definitely pushed in between Dearka and Milly, I assure you that there are no feelings involved but pure mischief from Yzak, Sai and Kazui! Those who are curious on how they'd be able to handle parenting 101 and go to other classes at the same time, read on! Oh! And LOL Sakura Kuonji! Thanks for that viscous/vicious thing. I should really take time editing my work. Gomenasai! 

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed.**_

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July 9, AW 

"Mr. Yamato, if you cannot keep your _baby_ quiet, I will have to ask you to leave the classroom early."

"Sorry, Mr. Enith." Trying to ignore the snickering of his classmates in Advanced Computer Programming, Kira turned to the empty seat next to him and gathered little Akira (Lacus had insisted on a Japanese name that came close to the baby's "father's") in his arms. God, it had only been four days and the baby was already driving him insane! Not only was he getting really distracted with his lessons, although he practically knew the lesson better than anybody, except of course for Athrun, but he couldn't seem to relate well with his "child". The only consolation he got was that Athrun was not doing any better than he was with Cathrun.

And as if on cue, Athrun's baby burst out crying. His best friend had a pink Snugli infant carrier strapped around his neck and was carrying the doll in front of his stomach. He let out a patient sigh and tried to rock little Cathrun back and forth.

Mr. Enith shook his head in frustration, muttering about the "insanity" of what Mrs. Takano was making the students of A. U. do. Everyone was beginning to get distracted, what with two dolls crying, so the teacher each gave them permission to leave early, saying that they were ahead of everyone else anyway.

Apologizing profusely, Kira and Athrun slipped out of the room, each lugging with them their laptop and a diaper bag, a baby blue one for Kira and a Pink one for Athrun. Kira had asked about that choice of color, and Athrun had bitterly explained.

_"Cagalli insisted that since it's a girl, pink would be the best motif..."_

It had been a long four days. Kira thought the weekend would never come...

Kira let out a sigh of relief when little Akira, who was cradled in his arms stopped bawling the moment he and Athrun had reached the end of the hall. He and Lacus had spent the first two days reading the manual of their baby, and found out that the technology was a little more complex than it seemed. The pamphlet said that the AI chip inside the doll was capable of "learning" traits. This had puzzled Kira even more, since the doll was not built to move by itself. He had asked Mrs. Takano about it and said that the traits the doll will learn from their parents or its environment will show through its behavior, ergo, its random emotional expression.

So basically, Akira had just shown a sign that it was starting to develop a trait. Only God knew what it was and from whom he got it.

Cathrun still had not stopped crying, and if anything was crying even louder. Kira shook his head in resignation. That stubborn trait obviously came from the mother.

"So, Kira." His friend turned to him as he gently patted his child on the back. It cooed softly and finally calmed down. "Tell me your sad story why you ended up getting stuck with your Baby."

Kira chuckled and shifted the diaper bag over his shoulder. "Lacus' Art class required her to go outside today, so she's over by the lake to find a subject for her next assignment. She said she'd gladly take Akira with her, you know, since she can keep him calm and really at peace more than I can, but I decided against it, what with this weird weather."

The weather really was unpredictable. Just last night, it had rained. And according to the news, it was a rare happening; Abashiri experiences minimal rainfall, just to signal the changing of the seasons, but last night, it had poured. Kira and Athrun were convinced that the particles of the Moon hovering over North and South America were causing the strange weather. It didn't really matter. They were expecting as much.

Another reason why he didn't let Lacus take the baby was because he had just discovered from Dearka, who seemed to be the only one among them who was doing the father thing quite well, that the baby was also programmed to become "ill". This meant that the AI chip would express itself like a very cranky baby, crying more than usual and sometimes even hacking and coughing and yes, even sneezing. Athrun was impressed by the technology and if it weren't for Cagalli's death threats, he probably would have cracked the doll open to examine its mech. Kira had laughed at the thought. Basically, their baby was nothing more than a highly advanced cyber pet, programmed to cry at random intervals and a bit of new features added to it. Fortunately, they did not have to change the diapers...

Kira turned to his friend. "And you're stuck with my niece because?"

"Cagalli said that since she took care of her yesterday, I should take care of her now. Which is actually better for me. Cathrun is acquiring too much of Cagalli's traits. I have to draw the line somewhere."

With this, the Freedom pilot laughed. It had been an interesting week. Too bad they still had three weeks left to keep the dolls, and what made him feel really down about it is that they might end up failing the project anyway, at the rate Akira was crying.

Not knowing where to go since they had still over thirty minutes to walk around aimlessly, they decided to go to the Bookstore and check if their uniforms had arrived. Mrs. Takano had said that they will be arriving anytime this week.

Along the way, they bumped into a very pissed Yzak who was running from the other direction. His eyebrows were knitted and his mouth was twisted into an undesirable scowl. When he saw the two of them, he made a beeline for Kira.

"Yamato," he snapped seriously when he reached them. He looked like he was going to explode, as his face was beet red.

"Hello," Kira greeted him, smiling. "You look mad."

Yzak narrowed his blue eyes at him. "Do you know why?"

Kira and Athrun shook their heads.

Yzak went ballistic. **"_IT'S BECAUSE I AM MAD!_"**

With this, Cathrun began to cry.

Athrun was upset. "Oh, man... Yzak, you made her cry."

The Duel pilot stared at him dryly. "Let me pretend I care."

Athrun scowled and sat down on the nearest bench, a few feet away from the two.

Kira dropped the diaper bag by his feet and shifted his hold on Akira. He was having a hard time in juggling the doll and his laptop. _Hmmm. Maybe I should consider renting a Snugli Carrier, too, _he thought to himself, momentarily distracted. Yzak yanked him back to reality.

"Your friends are driving me nuts. Do something about it." With this, the light-haired boy violently scratched his head. "They've been on and off and on and off, trying to make me help them pitch in on making Dearka's life a living hell. They are making me mad. Tell them to stop."

Kira blinked in amusement. "Why are they doing that? I think everything is going along fine with Dearka and Milly."

Yzak snorted. "Idiot Yamato. If I knew the friggin' answer to that, I wouldn't friggin' ask you about it."

Kira was not pleased. Abandoning his laptop on the diaper bag on the floor and covering his child's ears with his hands, he stared as the very stressed out boy. "Stop swearing," he said coldly. The last thing he wanted was to have the doll acquiring more negative traits. Maybe he should ask Lacus to take care of Akira for tonight, where the baby could pick up her mild demeanor...

Yzak was about to protest more when suddenly Sai and Kazui rounded the hall. They looked around and when they spotted Yzak, who had his back at them, they gave a little jump and hurried over to where the three Coordinators were.

They didn't necessarily catch him off-guard, but when the two approached, Yzak screamed frighteningly and raised his arms in front of his face, as if ready to fight for dear life. Sai and Kazui did not seem to notice the hostility.

"There you are, Yzak. We've been looking all over for you," Kazui said, a very wide, almost creepy grin on his face. "Can't you please take up our offer? We really care for Milly, and we really think she deserves to be happy, and the only thing Dearka is doing is taking a step forward only to take two steps back. You have to do something. You're the only one who can make Dearka mad enough to drive him to the brink of insanity."

Sai seconded, pushing his glasses up his nose. "Yeah, after that kiss in Tento, we just couldn't let the opportunity pass!"

Kira was really amused. For the past week, he had not been able to hang out with his close friends, what with them taking different classes and they didn't really share a pad. But even though they hadn't been together for the last few days, he had observed that the two had been a whirlwind of mischief that seemed to center on Dearka, Milly and surprisingly, Yzak. Normally, he would have expected Kazui to be the naughty one, and Sai to be quite the silent type, but it looked like with all the stress of fighting a war gone, Sai had taken a very large leap towards the foot-loose-and-fancy-free kind of attitude. It suited him. He needed to really get out more.

Yzak, it appeared, did not share his sentiments. "First of all, I do _not_ want any part of your stupid plan. Second, That was _not _a real kiss. I covered her mouth with my thumb and pretended to kiss her to make Elthman squirm a bit. And third, I don't see the reason why I have to be the goat here. Heck, if you really want their relationship to grow, why don't _you _make him jealous? Dearka will scratch anyone's eyes out so long as he's a guy who hovers around his girl. Really pathetic of him, too."

Kira blinked, amused. Even Akira seemed to be listening, for not so much as boo came out of him. Must be a trait he had acquired from the father...

Sai was persistent. "First of all, we knew your kiss was a dud. Second, I don't think I'm convincing enough to make Dearka make his move. You're the only one who can get him as agitated as he could be. And third, I think you'd really want to pitch in on this project."

Yzak sneered. "Oh, really? I'd like to find out why."

Kazui was not moved by his menacing tone. "Because, you wouldn't want anyone to know of your secret."

Yzak laughed sardonically. "That wouldn't frighten me anymore. Or have you forgotten who won that race?"

Sai casually examined his fingernails on one hand. "Oh, we're not talking about **_that _**secret."

"Oh, rea –"Yzak stopped in mid-sentence, then glanced at them uncertainly. "Wait a minute. What are we talking about?

With this, Kazui patted his left pocket, a smile slowly spreading across his face. Yzak glared at the square bulk in Kazui's pant pocket, not really sure if he got the message. Kazui stuffed his hand inside the pocket and pulled out a thin black cord, Which Kira later on discovered as a pair of earphones.

Kira tilted his head. _Oh. It must be a walkman in his pocket..._

Yzak snatched the earphones from Kazui's hand and plugged his left ear with it. At first, he was silent, then, slowly, his face became redder and redder, his eyes widening in incredulity. Then he screamed and lashed out at Kazui and Sai. "**_What the - !!? Bastards!!! You told me it wasn't on!!!! _**"Unfortunately for the furious Duel pilot, they scuttled away so fast that the only thing the Coordinator got his hands into was the snapped cord of the earphones.

Sai and Kazui had run halfway down the hall, and looked back only to wave at Yzak. "See you in RQ, buddy!" With this, they skipped away happily, arm in arm, down the empty hall.

Kira stared at Yzak and swallowed. The light-haired boy was breathing really hard, his fists clenched tightly. He had never seen him this mad before. "Yzak? Are you okay?"

The Duel pilot's left eye twitched violently, then he turned to Kira so suddenly that the Freedom pilot jumped back a step away. "My life is officially over," he muttered and angrily stomped away after the two who had merrily disappeared down the hall.

Athrun looked after him. "What was that all about?"

Kira shook his head slowly, as if in a daze. "I have no idea."

The bell rang signaling the end of class hours and Kira picked up his diaper bag and laptop. He happily looked down his little Akira. It was time to meet up with his wife.

ï -- ï -- ï -- ï 

That night, Kira was happy. Lacus had taken Akira, and Cagalli, after a lot of begging from Athrun, had taken Cathrun with them to their dorm. Dearka had explained that it really was Miriallia's turn to baby sit their doll, which they had named Stephanie, (When they first saw it, Miriallia had said it looked like a Stephanie, and Dearka did not argue.), and so their room that Friday night was baby-free and quiet.

Kira was sitting on the round dining table again, a new batch of brochures spread out before him. He still had not been able to select the perfect place for him to bring Lacus to. Dearka was sprawled on the floor in front of the TV, watching the evening news, in his hands a book that looked like he borrowed from Lacus. He was flipping its pages unconsciously as he stared at the screen. Athrun was on the phone with Kisaka and Cagalli on three-way for some reason.

When Athrun put down the phone, Kira automatically looked up. "What was that about?"

Athrun sat on the dining table from across him. "Kisaka said that the Archangel and the Kusanagi are leaving Japan. So is the Eternal."

At the mention of this, Dearka lowered down the volume of the TV. "What? Why? Where are they going?"

Athrun shrugged. "Well, peace talks have reached at least one decision, and that's to open the lines of communication between Earth and PLANT, so the Shuttle Stations are a two-way public transportation from now on.. There really seems to be more meetings that'll follow. Kisaka and Murrue will be going to Orb to return the Kusanagi and the Archangel, since there really isn't any use for armed battleships anymore. I guess that's a good idea, right? It's a cease-fire. We won't be needing those anymore..."

Kira blinked. "I suppose it's for the best. What did Cagalli say?"

Athrun laughed. "She cursed a lot and insisted that they take her with them to her people. Kisaka blandly declined. Said that there has to be more things learned here, that before one can understand a people, one has to understand herself **_as _**a person. Whew! Good thing she gave in. Or I might have ended up raising my kid all alone."

Dearka snickered. "And of course, you wouldn't want to have her that far away, right Athrun? Absence makes the heart go fonder, and you can't get any fonder than this."

Athrun's shoe was immediately in his hand and no sooner flying towards Dearka's smiling face. And again, he dodged it swiftly. It hit the lamp sitting on the side table, and it went toppling on the couch. Kira applauded him. "Nice reflexes, Dearka!"

"Experience is the best teacher," the Buster pilot muttered, restoring the lamp in its original place, then flopping down on the floor lazily.

Kira turned back to Athrun. "And the Eternal?"

"One of Lacus' personnel in the Clyne Faction came by shuttle last night and will be taking the ship back to PLANT."

Kira couldn't help but smile. "That's good. How about Andy and Erica?"

"Erica and Andy are working with the Human Resources Department to hold talks for people in shelters about the current situation. The Clyne Faction is doing the same thing, Dellit said, in PLANT. It appears that although everyone is relieved that the war is over, not everyone is willing to accept the Coordinator-Natural relationship yet."

Dearka grunted as he propped his feet up on the couch and started to watch the almost mute TV, where a baby panda was already doing cartwheels. "Can't blame them. Too many bad memories..."

Kira sighed and started to gather the pamphlets in one hand. "I know."

Suddenly, before anyone could respond, the door burst open, admitting a very satisfied-looking Sai and a very happy-looking Kazui. Between them was a very annoyed Yzak carrying a moist, brown paper bag obviously filled with several thin bottles.

Yzak was the one who spoke. His expression was contrary to what he said, and his forced smile made him look awfully disturbing to look at, what with that scar on his face. "It's a Friday. Let's enjoy ourselves."

Kira pushed the chair he was sitting on from the table, balancing himself on the two hind legs. "Good evening to you. What's up?"

Kazui and Sai plopped down on the carpeted floor on either side of Dearka's lying form and both smiled at him sweetly. Dearka bolted up to a standing position, suspiciously eyeing each boy in turns. "What do you want?"

Athrun's face broke into a happy smile when Yzak put the paper bag down on the table in front of him. "Alright! Beer!"

Kira blinked in amazement. "Beer?"

Yzak produced a bottle opener as Athrun began tearing open the bag with his hands. "Don't you drink, Kira?" The address caught Kira off-guard.

He shook his head. "No." He turned to Athrun. "You drink?"

Athrun nodded. "Occasionally. It's the only vice they allow soldiers at ZAFT. So basically, this is the only outlet we have in enjoying happy hour."

Kira was unsure of this, especially when Yzak forced a bottle under his nose, which he took anyway. Dearka was on his feet when Yzak offered him a bottle. The Buster pilot stared at him for a second too long and Yzak grinned after Kazui and Sai nodded slightly. Kira frowned. _These two are up to something..._

Yzak took a swig from his drink as Kazui and Sai approached the table to get their beer. They, too, looked hesitant at first. Murrue never let them drink in the Archangel. It was a safe bet that they also haven't tasted so much as beer.

Kira sniffed the mouth of the bottle and cringed. It smelled funny. Then, curiously, he raised it to his lips and took a sip at the same time Kazui and Sai took a brave swig of theirs.

After a moment, it started to rain alcohol. The duo had spewed a mouthful of beer into the air. Athrun laughed, Dearka grimaced in disgust. Yzak had a satisfied look on his face. Kira, on the other hand, who luckily did not drink so much, settled on politely swallowing the very strong, unfamiliar liquid. After that, he stuck out is tongue. _That was nasty!_

Yzak sat down on the free chair and propped his elbows on the table, rolling his bottle in between his palms. "You live such a sheltered life." Just then, he leaned forward and narrowed his eyes at Kazui and Sai. "I suddenly had an idea."

Kira gulped. This was not good.

Even Sai and Kazui who had immediately abandoned their bottles on the table, looked at him suspiciously.

Yzak grinned jubilantly. "If you down three bottles of beer tonight, I will go along with your plan."

Dearka frowned, "What plan?"

Everyone ignored him.

Sai harumphed, trying to get rid of the bad aftertaste. "Maybe you're forgetting who has the upper hand in this."

Yzak was not moved. "Be a man. Down three bottles each. After that, I'm all yours."

Kira blinked in amazement when he saw Kazui and Sai actually considering the offer. What baffled him more was that thirty minutes later, they were arranged on the carpeted floor with Dearka, Athrun, Yzak and himself on a circle with Sai, halfway done with his third bottle and with Kazui lying groggily on the couch, hiccuping violently after having been the first to take up the dare.

Dearka was happily pumping his fist in the air screaming "Chug! Chug! Chug!" with Athrun cheering along. Yzak, it was a remarkable sight, was screaming along with them.

Kira swallowed. Sai's face had turned into an unhealthy shade of blue. Kira watched as the last drops of beer disappeared into his mouth and belched loudly when he pulled away from the bottle.

Athrun, Yzak and Dearka broke into a noisy "YEAH!!! WHO'S DA MAN? YOU DA MAN!"

Kira merely shrugged. It had to be a drunken-guy thing. All three coordinators had their fair share in beer. He watched in amazement as Sai belched even more and the next thing he knew, he was toppling on the couch on top of Kazui, who grunted under his weight.

Dearka burst out laughing. He had a crooked grin on his already flushed face. "That was amazing!"

Yzak was stoically staring. He had stopped cheering the moment Sai dropped cold. "That'll learn you." With this, he stood up and stalked across the room. "Finally, peace and quiet in the pad. When they wake up, tell them I'll play along with their dinky plan starting tomorrow." And with that, he disappeared through the door, slamming it behind him unceremoniously.

"It isssn't dinky," muttered a half conscious Sai, then he belched again.

Athrun stared after him. "What was that about?"

Dearka suspiciously eyed the two fallen. "For some weird reason, I have a bad feeling about this..."

Kira looked at Athrun. They knew that it had something to do with Dearka and Milly, and honestly, he disapproved of their plan, but since he believed that they were entitled to do whatever they believe would be good for their friend, then so be it.

Dearka grumbled. "Man, I have to use the boy's room..." and he lumbered away, swaying a bit from alcohol intake. He and Athrun watched him disappear in the corner leading to the bathroom.

Athrun chuckled, nodding to the out-cold Sai and Kazui. "For some reason, I'm beginning to think Yzak is actually bonding with these two."

Kira nodded, but was suddenly distracted when something square and black dropped down from Kazui's pocket. _What is that? _Leaning over, he picked it up. It was a thin tape recorder.

Athrun looked over his shoulder. "Hey, that's what Kazui used to blackmail Yzak earlier, right? Let's listen to it!"

Kira frowned. "I don't think we should, though. Let's leave them alone."

But too late. Athrun, who was halfway tipsy, snatched the recorder away. "We won't tell."

Suddenly, curiosity got the best of him. "Okay. Press the button, Athrun."

Athrun pressed the button. Kira stopped breathing immediately as he heard an odd sound of splashing water. His eyes widened when he heard a voice that was unmistakably Yzak.

In the shower...

_**SINGING!!!**_

Athrun lodged a fist in his mouth to keep from laughing out loud as the singing drawled on and on.

"_And I can't smile without you/ Can't smile without you/ I can't laugh and I can't sing/ I'm finding it hard to do any – What the!?" _Kira heard more splashing and Yzak screaming loudly. _"When I get my hands on you two, you will **DIE**!!!!!!!!!!"_

Kira couldn't help it anymore. His side was hurting too much. He burst out laughing.

Athrun was rolling on the floor, the recorder clutched in his shaking hands. He turned the volume up.

They heard Sai screaming in the background. _"It was joke, Yzak! We weren't recording at all! Ouch! Stop it!"_

Then Sai. _"You sing really well, Yzak. Have you ever – OW! Not the Lamp! **NOT THE LAMP!**"_

A loud crash.

Then Yzak again. _"What the hell did I ever do to you?! Why do you keep on bothering me all the time!?"_

And the recorder ran out of tape.

Kira suddenly felt guilty and so he tried to keep a straight face. Athrun was struggling with his laughter.

"We shouldn't laugh," Kira said seriously.

Athrun fell silent. "Yeah, we shouldn't. To each his own."

After a while, they looked at each other and burst into another fit of hysterical laughter.

Tears were leaking down his face. "Yzak's singing sounds like a vulture mating call!!!"

Athrun once again rolled on the ground, this time pressing the rewind button on the recorder. "Let's listen to it again!!!"

But Dearka suddenly came out of the bathroom and the Justice pilot quickly slipped the recorder back Kazui's pocket. Both Kira and Athrun stopped laughing.

Dearka stared at them weirdly when he saw that both were red and crying from laughter. "Did I miss something?"

Kira and Athrun burst out laughing all over again.

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**_A/N: Oh, well! Hehehe! No sense again, huh? _**

_**Answers to the question of Amnesia, about when the characters will tell their feelings, I was still thinking at least somewhere in the end, just to give them an excuse for a little more fluff.**_

_**And Angel of Dreams, I've read your fic and I loved it. (winks) **_


	13. Phase 13:Again with the Volleyball

**_Author's Note: Thank you for the reviews on the last chapter, guys. I really should stop making Yzak look bad. LOL! But I just couldn't help myself...(Bwahahaha!) But thanks, guys, for all the compliments... I really am touched... (blush! Blush!)_**

_**Disclaimer: I do not own GUNDAM SEED.**_

**_July 10, AW Very, very early in the morning. (YAWN!!!) _**

**_"YIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!"_**

****Cagalli bolted upright from her bed in a heartbeat, eyes almost popping out of her head at the sound of Lacus screaming piercingly from the other side of the wall. Cathrun, who was sleeping snuggly in the rented crib next to her bed, burst out crying. No sooner was she out the door of her room after cuddling her baby to her chest. She ended up almost colliding with Milly and Stephanie just outside the room where the scream came from.

Milly's eyes were as big as saucers, gripping her doll tightly as it cooed. Cagalli, momentarily distracted, stared at it irritably. _How on earth did Dearka and Milly manage to make their child behave!?_

Milly pulled her back to reality as she pushed the door open and they poured in in a hurry, Cagalli calling out Lacus' name.

They were completely caught off-guard at what they saw, as opposed to seeing someone or something that had apparently shattered the songstress' mild demeanor.

There, on the bed, in her pj's, Akira held over her head, was Lacus, a horrified expression on her normally calm façade. What was funny was her little baby was laughing gaily.

"What happened, Lacus?" Milly asked as she moved to approach her.

"Stay back!" Lacus yelled in panic.

Cagalli was confused. Her eyes caught the digital clock on the side table. Seven in the morning... She turned to the very giddy girl on the bed. Lacus was scanning the floor desperately. "What has gotten into you, Lacus? That scream could have sent Kira running all the way from their RQ."

With this, Lacus swallowed hard, her eyes meeting Cagalli's. "A... a ... there's a... a co – co - ROACH!"

This was more than enough. With a squeal, Milly was on the nearest chair, warily scanning the floor. Stephanie giggled. Cagalli frowned. "A roach? Where did it go?" She scratched her head and bent down to look under the bed, Cathrun still crying in her arms.

Lacus whimpered. "Cagalli, it's no ordinary roach! It was **_big_**! And it was **_staring _**at me! It crawled away when I threw a shoe at it. I don't think I got it. Be careful, Cagalli! It's really big...!"

Cagalli handed her doll to Lacus, who took it gingerly. Annoyingly, the doll stopped crying. She went down on her hands and knees to search for the reason of her disturbed sleep. She was about to stand up when this time, it was Milly's turn to scream.

"CAGALLI!!! BEHIND YOU!!!!"

"Huh?" The princess looked over her shoulder... and her eyes widened in disbelief. The next thing she did caught even her off-guard. She squealed and scampered up on the bed with Lacus. "**_Holy! That's the biggest cockroach in the world!_**"

Well, it was! She did not even know roaches grew that big! Maybe it wasn't a roach at all. But it was **_creepy! _**Lacus was not kidding when she said it stared at her. Cagalli felt the hair at the back of her neck stand up by merely looking at it. It could easily be three inches long!

Cagalli felt her face heating up. She had never been this embarrassed in her life. She, Cagalli Yula Attha, who was known for riding alongside men in mobile suits and holding weapons, was afraid of a bug. She didn't care. That roach was **_HUGE_**! And it was crawling around on the carpet now!!!

Milly, being alone in the chair and nearest to their biggest threat, which was now turning around to face her, looked around helplessly, sweat beading her brow. Stephanie was giggling in her arms. "Lacus, Cagalli, the thing is coming at me! Do something, Cagalli!"

Cagalli swallowed. She looked over to the nearest wall and saw the shoe that Lacus had thrown at the roach earlier. Maybe if she could reach it, she'd be able to squash the thing... Her eyes darted from the shoe to the roach. She shivered. "Ooooh... Just a moment, Milly. I'll try to get that shoe..."

Lacus whimpered more.

Bending down on Lacus' mattress and reaching out for the shoe, she grunted. Her arm was a foot too short to reach the only weapon she could get her hands into.

Suddenly, even before she could try reaching for the shoe again, the door burst open, admitting a very vexed Kira who was wearing an orange Hawaiian shirt and jean shorts and sandals followed by Athrun, who was wearing pretty much the same thing, except that he was wearing a blue shirt instead. Both guys had pale faces. Dearka bolted through the door in a sleeveless yellow shirt and ripped jeans and thongs, saying something about searching the other rooms but no one was there.

Cagalli suddenly felt sick. Somehow, having these boys unexpectedly pop out of nowhere and into their pad looking like they had just stepped out of did not sit well with her. Her instant reaction was anger, but Lacus had the first say in it. "Kira! Kill it! **_Kill it!_**"

Kira was confused. "Kill what? What the heck are you talking about? We were knocking on the door for over ten minutes and no one was answering. What are you doing standing on top of furniture?"

Milly was squealing and dancing on tiptoe on the chair as she cradled her baby. "Dearka! Step on it! Quickly!"

Dearka, who was apparently distracted at seeing Miriallia in very short shorts and a thin pink blouse while she yelped and screamed, could only gape and stutter as he blushed deeply.

It was now Cagalli's turn to order her man around. "Athrun, if you don't squish it now, I will see to it that - "

Yzak's sudden entry in his baggy shorts and brown shirt made her stop in mid-sentence. "Oh, for the love of... Just stop on the damn roach." With this, he trudged near Milly's chair, pushed the gaping Dearka aside and unceremoniously crushed the cockroach with his sandaled feet. It made a gross squirting sound.

Cagalli cringed inwardly. _Eeeewwww..._

Lacus breathed a sigh of relief as she hopped down the bed after handing Cagalli her baby, then went straight to Kira who questioningly looking at her. They glided out the room with the songstress talking about how the roach had tried to scare her and Akira.

Cagalli shook her head in amazement as she saw Yzak reach put his hand to Miriallia and said, "Get down from there and get changed before Dearka faints."

Milly smiled sheepishly and took his hand as she hopped down the chair. "Thanks. That roach had me cornered." Then she hurriedly slipped out the room after smiling at Dearka.

The duel pilot had a sour face as he shot Yzak an evil glare, then went out to follow Milly. Yzak snickered evilly as he, too, followed them outside Lacus' room.

Athrun went to her side, his face red, obviously trying to hold back laughter. "You were stranded in here because of a bug?"

Cagalli was not happy. "One more word, Zala..."

Athrun raised his hands in surrender. "Sorry, ma'am."

The princess frowned as she eyed her boyfriend up and down. Not that he did not look good in his outfit, oh, because he did, but it was definitely the first time he had seen him in such attire. "And what are you supposed to be?"

Athrun laughed happily as he extended his arms and twirled around for Cagalli to see. "A beach boy."

This made Cagalli snort. "And why exactly are you beach boy?"

With this, Athrun had her in his tight embrace and was kissing her sloppily. Shifting the doll to one arm, Cagalli socked him in the ribs and he let her go. He grinned down at her. "Coz we're going to the beach!" He hopped over to the window and majestically pulled open the curtains.

Cagalli let out a small groan as a yellow ball of fire penetrated through the glass, warming her face. Shielding her eyes with one hand, she couldn't help but laugh out loud. "Oh, my God! It's the first day of Summer!"

"Get little Cathrun ready. It's an extended family weekend!"

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In the Eastbound highway, Miriallia looked out the window of the van the boys had rented for overnight use and smiled as she saw a fox digging through a toppled over trash can. She turned to Dearka, who was sitting next to her left, then to Yzak, who was sitting to her right at the back of the van. She did not know what was up with these two, but she wished they would stop. It was really starting to make her uncomfortable...

Sighing, she tweaked Stephanie's toes and nudged Dearka with her elbow. "Hey."

Dearka looked down at her with a curious expression. "Hm?"

"Where are Sai and Kazui?"

She did not know why, but both Yzak and Dearka snickered quietly.

Athrun, who was driving the van, peered over to them through the rearview mirror. "Hangover. Couldn't get up."

This time, it was Athrun and Kira's turn to chuckle. Cagalli, who was in the passenger seat, eyed her boyfriend suspiciously. "You didn't do anything to them just to get us alone, did you?"

Kira's eyes widened incredulously. He turned to his sister from the second row of seats in the van next to Lacus. "If we did, why is Yzak here?"

Dearka frowned. "Come to think of it, I don't even know why you came."

Yzak shrugged. "Are you kidding? Anywhere so long as it's a million miles away from those two is better."

Miriallia blushed. _Does that mean... Dearka wants to be alone with me?_

Oh, that was silly, asking that question. She was not blind and she was not deaf. Cagalli and Lacus were right. Dearka really did have feelings for her. And for a weird reason, she has actually gotten used to the attention. She was even entertaining the thought that she might, in fact, like him, too. There was too much blushing from her part every time he would sweet talk her. She peered up at his tan face, only to discover he was still looking down at her. This time, however, she did not look away. Maybe, just maybe, he could be more that just a friend...

Instantly, she felt guilty. No, she did not know what was wrong with her... Cagalli and Lacus had told her a thousand times over that there was nothing wrong with moving on, that Tolle would not think of it as being unfaithful to him.

She frowned. Lacus and Cagalli, she knew they were right. And she knew that she had to learn to let go, but there was something that she could not understand what the problem was...

Then, there was Sai and Kazui who seem to be making a career of making her, Dearka and Yzak's life anything but enjoyable.

"You okay?" Dearka asked when she kept on looking at him.

Miriallia blinked as she snapped back to reality. "I'm fine. Just a little sleepy. That cockroach really messed up our beauty sleep." She chuckled softy.

Dearka looked away, a bit embarrassed. "You don't need beauty sleeps. You're already beautiful."

Miriallia felt her face redden, but did not say anything. Instead, she clutched Dearka's arm and leaned her head on her shoulder. "I don't care. I feel like sleeping some more. Wake me up when we're there."

Closing her eyes, she saw Yzak stare at her, then look away, trying to hide an unmistakable smile, then she felt Dearka take the doll from her hands and stroked her hair gently. "Whatever you say, Miriallia."

_Haven't you noticed how he always calls you Miriallia?_ Cagalli's voice sounded in her ear.

She smiled her small smile. It did not matter. To her it was all the same. Her past was gone, and that was that. Maybe she should start thinking of her future...

ï -- ï -- ï -- ï

An hour or so later, Lacus Cagalli and Miriallia were crowded in the little dressing room, changing in their swim wear. She was having so much fun, and to think she hasn't even stepped into the sand yet! She couldn't wait.

This was an understatement, though. Her life has been nothing but a long wait. The war had made her wait so long... And now that she was here on earth with her friends, she only ended up waiting for something else; Kira's proposal.

Cagalli smiled as she looked at herself in front of the full length mirror. She had on a lime green bikini top and a very short, ripped jean shorts. "The beach is a really cool place. You have an excuse to walk around almost naked and people wouldn't care."

The songstress could not help but smile with her. But it was a sad smile. She knew that she envied Cagalli for being that outspoken about her feelings for the one she loves. But to her, it was anything but easy. Telling Kira what she felt was... well, really difficult. Not that she was afraid that he will reject her, but because she was afraid that he was not ready. It mattered to her, what he felt. And telling him her feelings just like that was selfish, simply because she knew she was going to expect an answer right away...

_I love you, Kira..._

_That's sweet, Lacus. I think you're really awesome, too. But right now, after my emotions have been trampled around by a girl who just got blown into smithereens before my very eyes, I don't think I can say I feel the same way. Sorry._

Lacus shuddered. This was how she had always envisioned their conversation.

Milly, who was looking really sexy wearing a one-piece backless strawberry print swimsuit, looked at Lacus admiringly. "You look really good in your bikini, Lacus. I wish I had breasts like yours."

"Wha- what?" Lacus stammered as she self-consciously covered her chest. Which was really a futile attempt. She was wearing a baby blue bikini that accentuated her body perfectly. Now that they've noticed, she did have full breasts... She blushed as she grabbed at the beach towel she had brought along with her. Cagalli snatched it away quickly, cackling her evil cackle as she tossed the towel to Milly.

"Oh, no you don't Lacus. When my brother sees you in that, I'm willing to bet my arm he'll propose!"

Milly seconded. "No one can resist a body like that!"

This time, Lacus was really getting uncomfortable. "That's it. I'm changing back..." And she was about to, really. Until Cagalli yanked her arm and tossed her out the dressing room like a sack of potatoes.

"Ahh!" Lacus cried out as she stumbled painfully in the sand. She felt her face heat up even more when she saw two boys stare at her up and down, grinning appreciatively.

Lacus immediately tried to hurry back inside but since Cagalli and Milly had already stepped out, there was no point anymore.

"You look fine, Lacus," Cagalli assured her. "You've told us many times before that you've always wanted to wear one. Now that you are, don't chicken out."

Lacus nodded shyly. It was then did she get all paranoid that this bikini was too small for her. Thoughts of what Kira might think made her head spin as she let herself be dragged to the edge of the water where she could see Dearka and Yzak stripped down to their swimming trunks playing a not-so-friendly-game of volleyball. Dearka had spiked the ball and hitting Yzak squarely on the face, thus making him fall on his back on the now hot sand.

The water was amazing. She could not believe anything could be more beautiful than this...

She saw Athrun running fast towards them in jean shorts, also missing a shirt. Lacus saw Cagalli wave at him and blew a sharp whistle with her fingers. "Looking good, Zala!"

When Athrun reached them, he tackled Cagalli to the sand and both of them rolled around, causing those white grains to fly everywhere. Cagalli was swearing and laughing at the same time. When Cagalli broke free from Athrun's embrace, she shook a fist at him and he ran so fast with the princess right behind him. She caught up to him near the water and pummeled him so hard it made Lacus recoil in pity for Athrun.

Moments later, Dearka materialized by their side and shyly nudged Miriallia's arm. He had left the still recovering Yzak somewhere on the seaside. "Hi."

It was Milly's time to feel self-conscious. "Hello. Where are the babies?"

Dearka pointed to the large umbrella they had set up somewhere near Yzak's still form. "Under the shade and sleeping like angels. Not once did Stephie cry. Cathrun, however, was a pain. But I found a rattle in the sand earlier while you were changing and she stopped crying when I shook it a few times."

Milly smiled and nodded. "You will be a great father someday, Dearka. You should –WHOA!"

Lacus laughed as Dearka suddenly hoisted her up over his shoulders in a fireman's hold and spun her around crazily.

"Dearka! NO!" Milly cried, beating on his back, but she giggled anyway.

Dearka laughed loudly. "Let's hit the waves, wife!" he said so un-Dearka-like, and sped towards the water, leaving Lacus standing there applauding.

When they were gone, she was left to her thoughts once again. _Where is Kira?_

She scanned the place and started to walk towards their umbrella where her baby was. No use standing around there. When she reached their spot, she smiled as she saw Yzak coming towards her. "Are you all right? I heard the ball hitting your face all the way over there."

Yzak grunted in reply as he dropped down next to her. "I'll live. Where are the others?"

Lacus pointed to the ocean. "Milly and Dearka are splashing around in the water. I think Cagalli is there too. Drowning Athrun."

Yzak laughed, which pleased Lacus. She had always found the Duel Pilot to be really too serious for his own good. "If you're looking for Kira, he went out to look for snow cones. He'll be back soon enough."

Lacus shrugged. "Hmm. Well, he does have a knack for disappearing. Are you having fun, Yzak?"

The question obviously startled him, but he nodded anyway, looking out into the sea. "I suppose. The beach is beautiful."

The songstress shook her head. "No. What I mean is, your stay here on Earth."

This surprised him even more. "My stay? Well, I guess it isn't that bad, except for Kira's idiot friends who keep on bugging me all the time. Good thing they're not here. Hehehe! And I guess School. I had to take Political Science 101 just so I could get the prerequisite Art of War."

"Art of War? You're taking that subject? Why?"

Yzak squirmed in his seat. "I don't now. I guess I wanted to study war without being directly involved in it. It's not that bad. It's different when you view it through the eyes of the civilians. Right now, I feel sorry for all the lives that were lost. Especially when I was the one responsible for it. We had this speaker yesterday, she was a wife of a soldier of the EA. She had three daughters. Her husband was one of those who were lucky enough to survive the war."

Lacus stared at the light-haired boy in amazement. Yzak, who used to be so bitter towards life, is actually empathizing with people greatly affected by the war between races. "I know what you mean, Yzak. It's good that we were invited to stay. I think it brings out the humanity in us that was never given to us because we were born this way. In a way I am happy."

This time, the Duel Pilot glanced at Lacus uncertainly. "After this, what now?"

Lacus frowned. "Huh?"

"After this, when Orb is rebuilt, the peace talks over, what then? Where will we go? Are you going back to PLANT?"

Lacus had not really considered this thought. Actually she didn't want to. She was someone else here. She was real here on earth. A teenager living her life as she should have lived it sixteen years ago. But for someone like Yzak, who had just begun to realize that this was how it was meant to be, the answer mattered to him. "We can stay or we can go back to PLANT. But to me it doesn't matter. So long as there aren't any more boundaries between Coordinators and Naturals, Earth is but a shuttle ride away, and we could always go back."

YZak liked that. He smiled as he continued to look away into the vast, blue sea. "You're right..."

Moments later, Kira arrived, his upper body bare and showing off his very nice shoulders, carrying three snow cones, already half melted. "There you are. Here, have a snow cone." He plopped down on the sand next to Lacus and handed each of them a snow cone. Yzak curiously looked down at it and sniffed. Then he took a small bite of it. He did not comment on the taste, but kept on eating it as he stood up and walked away from them, probably to give them some alone time.

"Hello. I thought you had forgotten to come back." Lacus licked her snow cone as Kira looked away. He was definitely trying not to stare at her, making Lacus conscious all over again. She pulled her long hair over her shoulder, trying to cover her breasts. "Uhm... you don't like my bathing suit?"

Kira spewed a mouthful of ice into the sand at her question. Nervously wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, he turned his head to face her. He had an odd look on his face, his face red as a lobster. "Your bathing suit? I... hehehehe! Love it! It looks ... hehehehee... really uhm... good on you." Lacus knew he was struggling with words because he changed the subject. "Say, I saw this really neat barbecue house down a couple of blocks. I think it would be a good place to eat lunch. Their special is barbecued breasts. I-I meant **_CHICKEN BREASTS_**! Not the ones that ... Yeah. Chicken breasts..." His eyes darted to her body, then hurriedly looked away.

Lacus felt her eyebrows knitting with worry. _He doesn't like it. He won't be proposing today. Or tomorrow. Or maybe never at all..._

Kira took a deep breath and faced her, abandoning his already melting snow cone on the hot sand. "Can I be honest with you?"

Lcaus gulped. _Oh, no. Here we go..._"Sure, Kira."

"I don't like your bathing suit."

Lacus gasped. She had always taken herself as someone who was not at all that concerned with her vanity, but hearing such an outright rejection from Kira about her attire felt like a slap across the face...

When Kira saw the look on her face, he hurriedly explained. "I... I can't help but see those other guys staring at you... And I don't like it... I don't want anyone to look at you that way... like they want you for themselves or something..."

Lacus' aching heart suddenly skipped a beat. She blinked in amazement as Kira tried to hide his face. Smiling, she looked over to Akira and found what she was looking for. There, next to the doll, was Kira's orange Hawaiian shirt. Scooting over and pulling the shirt to her, she immediately pulled it over her shoulders like a bathrobe. She could not help but smile. One because Kira was looking so adorably confused with what she just did, and two, because she could feel herself warmly surrounded by Kira's scent...

She finished off her snow cone and hugged the shirt closer. Feeling better, she decided to kid around. It was always easy to embarrass Kira. She looked away and said in a very loud voice, "Private Property! Lacus Clyne's body is for Kira Yamato's eyes only! Please do not look and do not touch!"

"Lacus!" Kira protested as he tried to stop her. Lacus scooted away from him, still shouting, "Private Property! Lacus Clyne's body is for Kira Yamato's eyes only! Please do not look and do not touch!"

"_Lacus!_" Kira was really embarrassed now. Lacus got up and was about to make a run for it, but Kira grabbed her wrist and pulled her back down so hard, she fell down against his bare chest.

Her heart suddenly stopped beating as she looked up into Kira's eyes. He was looking down at her, too, still blushing but he had a serious look on his face.

She blinked. "Kira?"

"Lacus..."

_Oh, no! This is it! _Lacus thought as she felt Kira lean down his face to hers. He swallowed hard as he tried to speak. "I... I... think..."

_Oh, God! This is it!_

Suddenly, something hit the side of Kira's face so fast that Lacus screamed as the Freedom pilot fell to the ground with a strangled "**_OOOF!_**" The next thing she knew was Kira was lying on his back, a very blank expression on his face. He was moaning in agony. Lacus looked around for the thing that had ruined her chances at finally kissing Kira for the first time, and maybe even hearing him say his feelings...

It was a volleyball.

Searching worriedly from where it came from, she saw Athrun being clobbered by Cagalli and – _huh!?_- Oh, God! Milly pounding Dearka on the head with one of her slippers.

She never saw that one coming.

The songstress laughed ruefully as patches of Cagalli's screaming floated down to where she was. "... Of all the careless mistakes!... Ruined such a perfect moment!... Once in a blue moon!... Kira's chance!... Feelings!... Never kissing you again!... "

Lacus sighed as she looked down at the still unconscious Kira, shaking her head and laughing. _I_ _Guess I can wait a little while longer, Mr. Yamato...Just a little while longer..._

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_**A/N: Just a bit of fluff here. Thanks to all of you who bother to read and review my work. I'm truly grateful. **_

_**And Lomiothiel? Answering your question: If Yzak did take the Tape recorder, then we wouldn't have found out what was in the tape! LOL! I just love to make him suffer! Don't hold it against me, please. He it the only character who needs to be developed more as he's such a rock!**_

**_Oh, by the way, I would like to ask you on what you want to happen in the next chapter. The setting is too good to pass so I'm planning on having either Dearka propose to Milly or Kira to Lacus. Do you want Kira to say his feelings to Lacus? Or Dearka to Milly. Either way will be fine, but here's the catch. Somewhere in the next chapters, I'm planning something for the couple who will be telling their feelings to each other in the next chap. We have to have growing pains here, too. Smile! (I'm not telling what it is, though.) So I'm kind of asking for your votes again. _**

_**Please leave me a review! Thanks!**_

_**Oh! I was not able to edit this... If there are any mistakes, I am truly sorry... **_


	14. Phase 14: Making Memories

_**Disclaimer: None of the characters here belong to the author. **_

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**_July 10, AW Late that night..._**

Cagalli irritably stalked across the beach, sending white sand flying in all directions. She looked around squinting into the deepening darkness that had it not been for the somewhat lopsided moon hanging lazily directly above her, she knew she would not be able to find what she was looking for. Not that she was doing a good job of it now; she's been looking around for Kira for over half an hour already, but there still was no sign of him, like as if her little brother did not like to be found.

The last thing she had seen of him was when he had helped Dearka out with the bonfire. (Because the boys had been so smart as to forget to bring along a tent, so they were fated to sleep under the stars that night. Except for Milly, who would be sleeping in the van with the babies.) After that, he disappeared, leaving Lacus quite disappointed. She seemed to be smiling less the whole day. What annoyed her was that even Athrun had managed to vanish in thin air. She had found him easily. Or rather, _he _found _her_. He had ambushed her in the trees, cornering her against a rock. He then started acting like the freak that he has become. So she kicked him in the groin, threatening him – and meaning it – that if he so much as plucked at a button from her blouse again, he will die a **_very_** violent death.

So leaving him jumping up and down in the most pathetic state she had ever seen him in – why on Earth do they jump up and down like that, anyway? – she had then set off to find the other missing.

Right now, she was starting to lose her patience. Then again, she's been losing her patience around everybody lately. It was probably stress, what with Cathrun misbehaving majority of the time, and Athrun acting the way he did. She was about to result to screaming Kira's name at the top of her lungs when she finally spotted him.

He was sitting alone on top of a huge rock, his knees against his chest. He was obviously examining something clutched in his right hand, but she could not tell what his face was conveying. His brown hair, which she had observed to have grown considerably in the last month or so, covered his face in shadows that not even the moonlight could show his feelings. Then again, he was always hiding his feelings. It was only lately that she had seen him laughing along, kidding around with the rest, making fun of Yzak's misfortunes and Sai and Kazui's practical jokes and misfits. But she knew, deep down, he was faking it.

A sister could always tell.

Approaching quietly, hoping to catch him off-guard, she tiptoed to her right, planning to surprise him from behind, but no sooner had she taken her second step, Kira raised his eyes to her and smiled his small smile. "Cagalli? What are you up to?"

Cagalli froze. Of course! How stupid of her! No one could take him by surprise. He was too... _"genetically enhanced." _She cringed at the thought. The fact made him look like a lab specimen, like a science project. Shaking her head, she waved and approached the rock he was perched on.

"Move over," she muttered, shoving him hard to make some space for her to sit on next to him.

Kira grunted as he almost fell from the rock, scooting over a bit to let her sit. "Hello to you, too." He slowly tried to stuff his right fist into his pockets, but Cagalli snatched his wrist quickly and pried his hand open.

Cagalli peered down at it to see, tilting his palm up to the light of the moon.

It was a thin, silver ring. Nothing was that grand about it.

The princess looked up to her brother's eyes and blinked. "Hey. Lacus' ring. Why did you take it off?"

Uncomfortably, he pulled back his hand and stuffed the ring into his pocket, then looked out into the sea. "Nothing."

Cagalli frowned. She tried to open her mouth, to tell this stupid boy that this was what he had to do, to tell Lacus of what he felt for her and live happily ever after. But she decided against it. She had always known that she was a very headstrong girl, always telling people what to do, always wanting to have her way. Evidence enough to prove that she was, in fact, a spoiled brat, contrary to what she wanted to believe. Yeah, she had always been in denial. But right now, her brother needed her, for what, she didn't know, and the last thing she wanted was to impress upon him her dominant attitude.

So instead, she leaned back on the rock, her face up to the sky, and sighed. "That volleyball on the face sure must have hurt."

Kira's answer, however, surprised her. "A wakeup call. That's what it was."

"Huh?"

Kira turned his lavender eyes to her, then immediately looked away. "Cagalli, how would you know if you were in love?"

Cagalli almost fell off the rock. "In love?"

"Yeah. In love."

She scratched her head uneasily. "Gee, let me see. It's like, you're thinking about the person all the time. You always want to be around her. And I guess you'd be having these feelings that you know you're willing to offer your life for her if the need arises. I don't know. It's kind of hard to explain... Why ask?"

The Freedom pilot shrugged. "Nothing, I guess..." After a moment, however, he changed his mind, discarding the conversation even before it began. "Cagalli, the last few days we're here in Abashiri, I felt alive. Laughter kept me alive. School, the doll, you. All of these kept me wanting to live, because it's fun. But every time I would find myself alone and with no one to laugh with, I would be dragged back into that time, when others have died for such a worthless cause, and I would feel bad, because I lived. And they didn't."

The mere conversation made Cagalli weak. She knew where this was leading to. "Fllay, right? We're talking about Fllay?"

It was remarkable, the change in his features. His posture, his face, everything changed, at the mention of the name. He buried his face in his knees. "I could have saved her, you know. I had sworn to protect her. And I failed. It's like a never-ending war inside my head, before I go to sleep, or when I wake up in the morning, it's all that I think about. Fllay screaming at me for not trying hard enough. Fllay dying because my best wasn't good enough. Everything, it's not good enough. My existence, even with the fact that I'm special, was not good enough..."

That surely threw her off the loop. She really had not known Fllay that long. She had seen her around but could not remember a moment where she got to talk to her civilly. Well, there was that one time on the deck of the Archangel. She had walked in on Kira while he was crying, (he tried to deny it, of course.) and she tried to comfort him, and then Fllay walked in, wearing that awfully short skirt and that uncalled for blouse... And if she were to be honest with herself, she never really knew what Kira saw in the red-haired girl. She could pass off as pretty, she supposed. But her personality did not look like Kira's type.

Milly had told her about the girl. Apparently, she had been very bitter about the death of her father, and was out hurting other people, specifically Kira, because she was looking for someone to blame. Cagalli frowned. She wanted to say that she somehow understood her, but in reality, she didn't. She, after all, had lost her father as well, but she did not go around continuing the chain of hurt and hate by causing others more grief. The girl probably was so into herself, thinking that she was the only one who was robbed of a loved one in that war... What a very selfish thing to think about...

Milly had also said that she had been Sai's girlfriend. Being a swell girl, she really did not bother asking for details. All she knew was that things got really messy and they kind of unofficially broke up and the girl just suddenly started hanging around Kira, seducing him into a fighting machine, regardless of what he felt about war and killing.

Cagalli sighed and placed a hand gently on her brother's shoulder. "Whose standards are you using to define what's good enough, anyway?"

Kira blinked and continued to stare into nothingness, probably pretending to think. He did not answer her question. "I could have saved her. There were so many things I could have avoided then, you know. Nicol dying, Tolle dying, Fllay... Many others I don't know the names of..."

Cagalli snorted. "Oh, so now you're blaming yourself for not being able to save the entire species? Don't give yourself too much credit. As far as I could remember, you weren't the one who started the war. If anything, you were actually one of the few who started seeing it through a different angle."

"But they still died..."

"Yeah. So?"

Kira stared at her as if she had just sprouted horns. "_So_? That's all you have to say? _So_?"

Cagalli did not like that. He made her sound like as if she didn't care, when she knew deep down, she did. "God, what do you want me to say, Kira? What do you want me to do? Cry? Blame myself because my dad decided to die with style when he could have avoided such a tragedy if he had been smart enough to have thought of having a remote control detonator in his pocket? Do you want me to say that I'm not happy with what happened because many people died and I lived?"

That was when they started screaming at each other. Depressed people who try to hide their feelings, they really should not be talking to each other without other people present. They might just end up hurting each other. "Yeah, Cagalli! Like maybe you could show a little grief at the loss of your father! Like maybe for once, you could just pause and think of those who died, instead of playing kissing games with Athrun all day!"

All right! That was definitely below the belt! She did NOT play kissing games with Athrun all day! Cagalli clenched her hands into fists. "FYI, Kira. I am sad that my father is gone. And there are times when I would think that, yeah, I wish he really hadn't died at all! But reality check, Yamato: HE'S DEAD. Whether I like it or not! I've lost friends, too, just like you. We all have. But you don't see us moping around refusing to accept the fact that WE, unlike them, ARE STILL ALIVE!!! Sure, grieve! There's nothing wrong with that. But to keep on thinking about it, letting our memories bind us in that prison that we so desperately tried to get out of, it's pointless, Kira! Look around you." She gestured wildly at the distance where Dearka was sitting in front of the bonfire across from Yzak, who looked like he was crouched deep in thought. Athrun, Milly and Lacus were not there.

"Look at everyone here. Everyone is struggling to be free from the memories. Dearka, a Coordinator who had practically nothing going on for him, ready to kill anyone who got in his way before, can take care of a stupid doll better than you and Athrun can! He's trying very hard to enjoy his life, and is now doing his best to make up for the grief he's caused Miriallia, and HECK! I wouldn't be surprised if he ended up loving her! Which leads me to another delicate matter, because I don't think Miriallia is ready, yet she looks like she's warming up too fast. And since I'm such a swell girl, I will gladly explain what it means. It means that she may either make Dearka happy, or make him the most miserable guy in the world. Athrun, his father had died, too! And now he could hardly think about it coz of his - " Cagalli held back the words that almost escaped her mouth about her horny boyfriend. "– his own problems. And there's Yzak, who looks like he won't last till Fall at the rate Sai and Kazui are ganging up on him - "

This time, Kira was annoyed. He pulled at his hair irritably. "Look, I really don't know where this conversation is going, so let's - "

"I'll tell you where this conversation's going. It's leading to the obvious fact that everyone has had their problems then, but they have a new set of problems now. YOU have different priorities now, Kira! You have different obligations to different people. People who are ALIVE!"

At first, Cagalli thought the silence between them meant that she had won, but she had another thing coming. Kira sighed and hopped down the rock. With his back turned to her, he shook his head. "Someone like you can never understand me..."

And that was when Cagalli snapped. She leaped off the rock, grabbed Kira by the collar, whirled him around and punched him on the mouth so hard he staggered back a few steps. She did not realize she was breathing hard. She unconsciously unclenched her hands and stared at her palms where her nails had been digging in. A few more seconds and she swore she could have drawn blood.

Kira looked at her in disbelief. "Cagalli?"

The princess furiously rounded on him. "I think you should stop thinking about the things you can't change and start thinking of the things that you can!" She sized him up with blazing eyes. "Because if you haven't noticed yet, there's a person who would gladly accept you not because she wants anything in return, but because she really cares for you. And you know what? She cares about what you feel. And that matters so much to you, right, Kira? Other people thinking about your feelings?"

And then they were silent. Cagalli sucked in sharply, filling her lungs to bursting, then letting it go slowly. Her heart was racing. It annoyed her so much that she had to be the one saying this to him, since she really was not that patient with explaining things. But a sister's got to do what a sister's got to do...

But just when she was going to say something to him again, the next thing that happened almost made her heart ache.

Kira started to cry...

Quiet tears first fell slowly down his cheeks, then more tears came. Kira looked shocked at what he was doing. At first he touched the tips of his fingers to his cheek, then when he realized what was happening, he hurriedly dashed them away. Cagalli swallowed hard. Thoughts of Kira on the deck, all alone and hurting, flooded back to her, making her heart ache even more. Her face breaking into a very sad smile, she spread her arms wide and enveloped Kira in a tight embrace, just as she did before. "There, there..." she murmured.

Unlike before, though, Kira was not hesitant at returning the gesture. Burying his face in her hair, he started to weep, like a boy who needed his mommy. "I want to move on, Cagalli! I know I have to, because you're right, but it's just so hard...! I don't think I want to allow myself to forget about them all, but I will move on. Help me... But, w-why won't they stop coming, Cagalli? Why can't I stop crying?"

Gently rubbing his back to comfort him, she whispered in his ear. "Let them come. Let them all come, Kira. Cry. Grieve for those you've lost in the war. Grieve until your heart feels better. And after crying, we will laugh..."

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Athrun winced as he slowly sat down a few paces from the camp fire and sighed as he looked out into the distance. Summers in Hokkaido, according to what he's heard, were supposed to be warm. But tonight was probably an exception. Goosebumps were forming up his arms and legs as a cool breeze blew in from the water. Pressing onto his stomach, he groaned. Cagalli kicked like a horse.

So far, this was the farthest he had gone with her, attacking her shorts, and so what he got was pretty much the farthest thing she's ever done to him. Man, things were really not looking up... Not just once did he ask himself what was wrong with him. Maybe he needed someone to talk to.

"Hello, Athrun."

Athrun looked over his shoulder and saw Lacus approaching him. She was wearing the sweater she had borrowed from Dearka. Which confused him. Where was Kira anyway? He smiled, waved, and then patted the sand next to him. "Hey there. Care to join me?"

She nodded and settled next to him. "My, the night is pretty. I cannot believe how bright the moon is."

Athrun's eyes automatically flew to the moon. Honestly, he hated staring at it. It reminded him too much of his father's stupidity. "Yeah. Nice moon." He returned his gaze to the sea. "How are you doing?"

She smiled, pretty much the same way she used to smile, her eyes closing a bit, her head tilting to the right. He had memorized everything about her then, because he had wanted to make sure he would not forget the face of his bride-to-be. That was then, of course. And now, he considered her as a good friend. But his memory, however, told him that there was something different about her now. She looked... troubled. Lacus Clyne was never troubled. She could face a room-full of armed men out to get her for treason, and she wouldn't even bat an eyelash.

He peered into her face. "Are you all right?"

The question caught her off-guard. "Me? Why ask, Athrun? I am fine."

The Justice pilot chuckled softly. "You always had been a good liar. You can keep your emotions inside without letting anyone know what you feel. But right now, I can tell you're fibbing. Which is the reason why I'm asking if you're okay."

She blushed at the statement. "Am I that obvious?"

"No. I'm that perceptive. Is it about Kira?"

Again, she was caught off-guard. "How did you know?"

"Who else could it be? Our daily activities involve school, home, baby and friends. Can't possibly be home or school, coz you girls probably have that covered already, and of course there's the baby, but yours is like an angel compared to mine. So that leaves Kira."

She laughed weakly, pushing a stray strand of pink hair behind her ear. In the glow of the fire, her face looked younger than her age. She needed to smile. She was that kind of girl that needed to be happy all the time. "Kira and I are fine. We're friends."

"Why do I have the feeling that that's exactly the problem?"

That made her laugh. She started to dig her toes in the cool sand, busying herself with making sure her feet were unseen. She was stalling, he knew. But when she started to speak, he felt sorry for her, simply because he understood what she meant. "Athrun, have you ever felt confused about your life lately? Because I have. I am very confused, because I've grown up with everyone thinking and deciding for me. My life, it was a big script for me to just follow and read along with." She giggled, picking on the sand with a long rock she had unearthed. "Like us, getting married and all that, because our parents told us so. It involved little or no feelings and emotions at all. All we needed was a little getting used to. And our future is decided because we know it's _'for the best'_, right? But now, we're here, deciding for ourselves, and I have no idea how to handle the privilege."

Athrun imitated her, plunging his toes in the sand. It felt good, wriggling his feet in the compressing grains. "Are you scared?"

"Huh?"

"Are you scared of making your own decisions because of the possibility you might make a mistake?"

She paused a bit, then shrugged. "I guess that's a part of it. Isn't it silly? I've led people out there in a war, and we were victorious. But I can't even lead my own feelings."

Athrun looked at her from the corner of his eyes. "That's a totally different thing. The problem with feelings, as opposed to soldiers, is that they're very insubordinate. You can tell your heart that you shouldn't feel this or that, because we'll end up getting hurt, but we feel it anyway, because we can't help it. Like I suppose what you're feeling right now about Kira. Right?"

Lacus rested her chin on her knees and laughed softly. "You really are that perceptive?"

Athrun shook his head. "I'm afraid at that department, you're too obvious. We all see it, Milly, Cagalli. I guess even Dearka does, and I suppose Yzak. Cagalli wouldn't stop pummeling me when I accidentally spiked that ball to Kira earlier. Sorry about that, by the way."

"Oh, you don't have to be sorry. We really weren't talking about anything?"

"You're lying again."

She scratched her forehead, embarrassed. "Sorry. I was waiting for him to say something, anything, about where we stand now. Believe me, I think Cagalli isn't the only one with the patience of a housefly. I guess I have to wait for him a little while longer."

The Justice pilot started drawing circles on the sand and smiled. "Okay, so tell me again why you have to wait for him to draw the line between you two."

Lacus gasped, scandalized. "Why, you ask? Because it's the standard, Athrun. It's the ideal way to start."

"That the guy should make the first move?"

"No! I mean yes. I mean... Oh, Athrun, stop making it really hard for me. There's more to it than that. Kira, he's different from any other guy. He has too many issues that I cannot help him with, too many sad memories I will not be able to erase..."

"Fllay?" Athrun sighed in resignation, digging his feet deeper into the sand. He supposed he understood Lacus' point. But he didn't know what to say to make her feel any better than how she feels now.

Lacus tried to brush away the thick tension between them at the mention of the name. "I have no right to tell Kira how I feel. It would be easier if I knew that I wouldn't care whether or not he says yes or no. But the brutal reality of it is, I care a lot. I'm really selfish that way."

Athrun turned to face her and pulled gently at her bangs. "Don't say that, Ms. Clyne. I have never met anyone who is as selfless as you. Kira would be stupid if he let you go."

Lacus gazed at him for a few silent moments, then smiled. "Thank you, Mr. Zala. Cagalli is very lucky to have you, too."

The elation Athrun felt for having helped her automatically nose-dived."Yeah, right. Cagalli, lucky. As if."

It was the songstress' turn to inquire. "Are you having a bit of a problem with her?"

Great. This was what he was trying to avoid; talking to a girl about a guy thing. But he really needed help. Dearka was the only one he had tried to talk to about it. He really didn't help much. Scratching his head uncomfortably, he lied down on the sand, his hands behind his head. "I don't know if you'd understand it, but I think something is wrong with me."

"Wrong?"

"Yeah. It's kind of complicated. And embarrassing to tell." The Justice pilot sighed as he stared at the sky, trying to decipher the constellations in his field of view.

Lacus looked down at him curiously, her big eyes blinking slowly. "Embarrassing, you say? Could it be that I could help in any way?"

"Help, huh?" Athrun rolled to his side, propping his elbow in the sand and then resting his head in his palm. "Have you ever felt like you wanted something so badly in your life that only one person can offer you, and you know that it's wrong to demand it, but you feel so strongly to have it?"

Lacus stared at him for a while, deep in thought, then she slowly answered. "Well, there was this one time when I had wanted to go out for ice cream, and my father wouldn't let me go out alone, and he didn't want me to go out with anyone else but you then, but you were away to train, so I ended up craving for ice cream all day... Does that count?"

Athrun felt his mouth drop open. Who was he kidding, talking to Lacus, the embodiment of innocence? Here he was talking about sex, and she was talking about ice cream.

When he didn't respond, Lacus waved a hand in front of his face. "That doesn't count, huh?"

Athrun fell on his back again. "Hardly. But since we're there on the subject, let's make it simpler, shall we? Let's say, this craving, _ice cream, _well, didn't it hurt? When you badly wanted it, but you weren't able to get it because of factors that are beyond your control?"

The songstress smiled and started to shove sand around Athrun's arm. "I suppose. Yeah, I felt really moody the whole week, because you didn't come to visit me then and I really had wanted ice cream..."

"Ouch. So you just wanted me there because I was your ticket to the ice cream house?" She started to protest, but Athrun laughed. "I'm only kidding, Lacus. Continue."

Lacus frowned at him, but continued with what she was saying, as well as trying to bury his arm in sand. "Well, as I was saying, I was moody the whole week. I tried to find alternatives, like that two-month old Popsicle in the freezer, but it wasn't the same. It wasn't enough."

Athrun felt his face heat up. _Kissing Cagalli just isn't enough..._

Lacus started to pour sand on Athrun's chest now. "But you know what?"

"What? And what the heck are you doing?"

She giggled. "Trying to bury you alive."

Athrun groaned inwardly. "All right, but this is just because you're listening to me. Continue."

"Well, at the end of the whole week of being deprived of my craving, you came."

"I did? When was this again?"

"You brought my first Haro, then. Don't you remember?"

Suddenly, the memory came back. "Oh, right! I brought you a gallon of mint chocolate ice cream! But I didn't stay long then, right? Barely ten minutes so I didn't know what you did after that. What did you do?"

Lacus laughed gaily. She seemed to be enjoying herself covering him with sand. "I pigged out in my room, eating it all by myself! Finished it the moment I opened it."

"What? No way? That was a gallon!"

"Of **_ice cream_**! Do you get what I'm saying?"

"Huh?"

"As related to your problem. You see, I wanted ice cream so badly the whole week, but I knew that I could not have appreciated the mint chocolate you've brought as much as I did then, if I didn't wait that long before I had it. If, let's say, I had a bit of chocolate mousse ice cream anytime in the week, the gallon would have been stowed away in the freezer with the Popsicle after a couple of spoonfuls." She finished burying his upper body and had now started with his other arm. "Sometimes, it's better that way, because in the end, with the satisfaction we get, we'd say to ourselves, 'Hey! It was worth the wait!'."

Athrun blinked in amazement at the sudden realization of what she had just said. The analogy was so simple, yet so true... Of course, he knew that telling his hormones to behave was going to be a difficult job, but he kind of knew where to start, now that he's found a motivation.

Lacus stopped pushing sand against him and pointed to the far shore. "Look. Cagalli and Kira are back. I wonder where they went?" Just then, a sad look passed her face again at the sight of Kira.

Athrun pushed himself up, brushing his shirt of white sand. "Lacus, talk to him. Tell him how you feel. It doesn't matter. Just do it. Don't even try to bother thinking about what he might say, because either way, what you feel matters, too. However it'll go, so long as you know you've told him, you'll be able to put your heart to rest."

Lacus bit her lips nervously, but slowly, painfully, she nodded. "You're right. I think I'll go approach him..."

Athrun turned around to look over at Kira. "Don't bother. He's coming this way." Standing up, he reached out and offered a hand to the songstress. She took it and he helped her stand. "Good luck." He nodded at her and jogged over to meet Kira and Cagalli halfway. At the sight of him, Cagalli instantly scowled, patted Kira on the back, then went to approach the van parked nearby.

Athrun paused to say hi to Kira, then ran after the princess. He caught up to her halfway to the vehicle. He didn't try to grab her arm to stop her from walking; he knew better than that. Instead, he called out to her. "Cagalli, can we talk?"

She did not stop walking.

"Please?"

She still didn't stop walking.

Athrun tried again. "I'm sorry, Cagalli. I was wrong to have pressed myself on you that way, okay? I'm sorry for being that way for the past week or so. What can I do to make it up to you?"

That made her stop. Athrun found himself nervously gritting his teeth. Asking Cagalli suggestions for redemption wasn't exactly a good idea, but he knew he was wrong, and if it was needed for him to walk on burning coals to get her to forgive him, then so be it.

Cagalli turned around to face him. Athrun took a step back, ready to face the flames of hell, but none came. In fact, the princess had a very calm face, her eyes very placid. She crossed her arms over her chest and sighed. "Come here, Athrun."

He slowly dragged his feet across the sand, almost stumbling when he tried to avoid a scuttling hermit crab in the way. He stuffed his hands inside his pockets and looked down on the ground, waiting for the punishment.

A minute passed. Then five. Then ten. Nothing came. Except for a cool hand on his cheek. He looked up to see Cagalli staring at him dryly. "Athrun, all I want from you is a bit of respect that I think I deserve. To tell you honestly, I am very flattered that you find me... uh... that appealing. But - "

Athrun cut her off. "Cagalli, you don't have to explain. I understand. And I was a beast for having even tried. I want to blame it on my body, but that's really no excuse. Look, I promise you that I will take full responsibility of my actions from now on." He cupped her hand touching his cheek and smiled sadly. "Because I want to make it worth the wait, Cagalli. I want to make it worth the wait... Whenever that would be, because I could never be more sure with my feelings... Knowing that it wouldn't matter. However long it's going to take. Coz in the end, it's always going to be with you."

That surely had her thinking. She was staring at him with saucer-wide eyes. Then after a moment, she did the last thing he was expecting her to do; she slapped him hard on the face. Then, she did the second to the last thing he expected her to do; she kissed him.

And at that moment, that kiss meant everything to him. Nothing could have been more pure. It was different from all the kisses that they've had. It was a ghost of a kiss that lingered for a second, but left so much to remember. This had nothing to do with lust at all.

It went deeper than that. Way deeper...

Cagalli tousled his hair gently. "So should I thank Lacus for this?"

Athrun shook his head. "Nope."

"What were you talking about?"

"Mint Chocolate ice cream."

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Kira saw Lacus wave at him when he approached her and he waved back.

It took him more than the courage he had to keep his legs to walk up to her. She was standing quite stiffly in an oversized sweater, her pink hair over her left shoulder. She looked like she was waiting to be shot.

_Pretty much what I'm feeling._

"Hello," he greeted when he finally made it to her side. This was the first time he would be talking to her alone after the volleyball incident. She seemed to be a little nervous now. Pretty much how she was then.

It confused him. Could Cagalli be right? That Lacus could actually be _waiting _for him? God, waiting for _what _about him? Could it be true that someone actually cared for him that much?

"Hi." Her voice was steady and calm. Only her hands gave her away; she was wringing her fingers nervously. "Nice night, isn't it?"

Kira nodded, feeling quite embarrassed at the obvious uncomfortable state they were in. "Nice ocean. Nice breeze. Nice night."

She nodded and looked away to the bonfire where Yzak was doing something, Dearka silently staring out into the sea, lost in thought. Kira squinted to see what Yzak was doing. He was writing on a notepad. Quite bewildered at seeing the Duel pilot writing, he tried to focus, and turned to Lacus.

In reality, he did not know why he had wanted to talk to her. He just felt like he had to. Maybe it was because of Cagalli. He did not know for how long he had cried on her shoulder, but it felt good. It felt good to cry shamelessly, for once. The conversation that he's had with her sister would not leave his thoughts. And most especially the fact that she said Lacus cared for him deeply. And now that he felt a little better about things, he felt like he owed himself to try to be fair to the people around him. And so he felt like he needed to talk to Lacus.

Starting the conversation, however, proved to be the problem. He had no idea where to start.

Luckily, she started it. "Can we talk, Kira?"

The Freedom pilot nodded and gestured to the ground. "Want to sit down?"

"All right." And so they settled on the sand and tried to make themselves comfortable.

"So. What do you want to talk about? Because I kind of wanted to talk to you about something as well."

Lacus stared at him nervously, but blinked away her expression, then turned to the sea. "Kira, I've been thinking lately. And to tell you honestly, I don't know how you'll take it..."

Kira frowned. She sounded so serious and depressed. He started to worry. He hoped nothing bad has happened, at least not now, when he's finally sort of decided to define what it was between them. "Is everything all right?"

She giggled. "Everything? I suppose, since nothing's wrong. Are you feeling better from that volleyball?"

Kira awkwardly laughed. "Still stings a bit. But I kind of felt like it was a blessing in disguise." He needed the time to think. Otherwise, he probably would be saying things differently.

His comment made her sad. He did not understand it, but she recovered quickly. "Kira? What are we?"

The question surprised him. It was so sudden, but part of him was happy because it kind of came close to what he wanted to talk about. He shrugged and ran a hand through his hair. "Us? Well, we're ... we... we're friends. Right?"

Again with the disappointed look. She began playing with the sand, her long pink hair hiding her face from view. "Friends, huh?"

Kira started to panic. He did not want to try to get the wrong message across to her. All he said was the truth; that they were just friends... but there was more to be said. "Lacus... I wanted to tell you something... "

She laughed sadly, shaking her head. "No, Kira. You don't have to say anything. I understand perfectly well."

_Huh? So I don't have to explain to her my feelings for her? _"You do? Because I thought you wouldn't understand... I'm sorry it took me this long to say it. I was afraid, and confused... so... "

Lacus raised her big blue eyes at him and frowned. "Look, Kira. You don't even have to explain. I should have known better than to have expected you'd feel the same way for me... Because we're just friends after all..."

"Huh? Whoa... wait a minute - "

She tried to smile, but a tear fell down her cheek. Just one single tear, and she wiped it away. Why was she crying? "Kira, Athrun told me that I should tell you about what I feel for you, and just not care what you'd say, so that I can put my heart to rest."

This was really making things harder to understand. Kira scratched his head. Why on earth was she sad, if she understood what he felt for her? Could it be that she doesn't like him at all, contrary to what his sister told him? "Athrun told you to tell me what?"

The songstress sighed and slowly got up to her feet. Kira followed her with his eyes. Looking down on him with the saddest expression he's ever seen on her beautiful face, she shook her head. "I love you, Kira."

And the whole world and everyone with it disappeared. Kira was left all alone and confused at what he just heard. So it was true. He didn't want to believe it at first when Cagalli had said it, because he did not know how to deal with the reality of the feeling of having someone genuinely love you back. He knew that he's felt a lot for this girl, but everything just went along unspoken, and he thought that it was enough for him.

Until he found out that it was not enough.

For the insatiable heart, it was never enough...

Right then, he knew that things were changing, and he did not know how he was going to deal with it. Lacus had just told him she loved him, and here he was with nothing to say. He knew he owed her at least a reply.

Standing up on wobbly legs, Kira cleared his throat and whispered, "I love you, Lacus." It felt good to say it. It felt right. He did not know why, but it did... maybe because it was true.

This time it was the songstress' turn to gape. "W-what did you say?"

Kira bit his lips and sighed. "I love you, Lacus."

The reaction was not among those that he was expecting. She laughed and shook her head. "You can't possibly love me, Kira. So don't say things that you don't mean."

Now that was confusing. First, she tells him she loves him, then when he tells her what he feels, she doesn't believe him. "But, Lacus. I'm not just saying this..."

She shook her head again, her hair swishing down her back. "Then why? Why do you say it?"

Kira shrugged. "I don't know. I guess it's because that's what I feel."

She looked at him doubtfully. "What do you know about love, Kira? Isn't it too much of a big word for you right now? There are too many things that you're still hung up with, and I don't even know if I have enough space to squeeze in between your crowded heart."

Kira tried to move towards her. "Lacus, I don't know anything about love. I don't know what its definition is, or whatever. But I do know this. I love you the way I pretty much understand it. Shouldn't that be enough?"

His heart began to sink. He knew it. It was too good to be true, to find someone who would be able to accept him and think that what he could offer would be more than enough... There were just too many things the world demanded.

He sighed in resignation. "Is it true that you really feel the same way?"

Lacus nodded slowly, another tear rolling down her cheek. "I do."

"Then why don't you believe me when I tell you that I love you?"

"Because, Kira..." this time, she just let the tears flow freely. "Because I'm afraid that it's not true... " She wrapped her arms around her protectively and shivered.

Kira slowly placed his hands on her shoulders and peered into her very sad eyes. "Don't you trust me?"

The songstress looked away. "I want to... But... Kira, what did Cagalli say to you? She said something that made you talk to me, didn't she?"

Now that was an insult. He did not want to appear like he was saying this because someone else told him to. Things were deeper than that. He just didn't know how to explain it right. "Cagalli told me a lot of things, Lacus. And I'm not going to lie to you by saying that I'm completely over my issues. Because I'm not. One way or another, my guilt will continue to haunt me, and to tell you honestly, I wouldn't know if it would be better if I just stayed away from you. But you... you're one of the reasons why I am alive right now. You're one of them that help me forget about the fact that there's more to life than lingering on the past. Cagalli was right. I should stop dwelling on the things I can't change and start thinking of the things that I can. And so I'm starting, Lacus. I'm taking that small step towards you." He smiled uncertainly. "Because I could never stay away from you. Even if I tried. So please believe me that what I feel is true."

He did not know how much it mattered to him until he finally saw her smile. It was the most beautiful smile in the world. Nothing could compare to it. Nothing at all.

He tilted her chin up and beamed at her. "I don't have anything to offer you, Lacus. I can't promise you that you'll be happy with me all the time, and that everything will be all right from now on. Because I don't know if I can keep such a promise. There are times when I'll be hard to get along with, and I'm already apologizing for it. There will be times when I'll be moody, when I end up remembering things that I shouldn't, so I'm apologizing for that too. There really isn't much to my words, but they're words I will try to live up to. That's the only thing I can offer you. Is it enough?"

Oh, God. Let it be enough... 

Lacus tilted her head to the right and blinked. "Well, now that you've started it, I guess I might as well follow. I really have nothing much to offer as well, Kira. Just me. I'd like to warn you that I am very hyper in the morning, contrary to how other people are. Cagalli complains that I snore when I sleep, and I get random cravings for ice cream that have to be satisfied quickly or else I get moody. So I am apologizing in advance for that. Oh, and I also - hey! Why are you laughing?"

Kira _was _laughing. This was the weirdest conversation he's ever had in his life. "I'm sorry, Lacus. It's just that... Oh, nothing." He dropped his hands to his sides and then shrugged. "Well... Now what?"

Lacus frowned. "Now what?"

"I don't know." Kira scratched his head. This was the first time he's ever been in an exclusive relationship, so he really did not know what to do.

Lacus was equally clueless. "Neither do I."

"But you've been engaged before."

"That doesn't count. It was arranged. I never underwent the courting stage at all."

It was the oddest of all feelings, having to think of what they had to do next. Nothing really changed, except that he felt all warm and fuzzy inside. But after a while, he decided that it didn't matter. They did not have to figure it out tonight. They had forever to think about it and figure each other out. "Uhm, so. Do you want to look for some shells by the water?"

Lacus smiled gratefully. "That would be wonderful."

Kira turned around and started to walk towards the seaside, Lacus following him a few steps away. Just then, he felt her cool touch on his hand, loosely twining her fingers to his.

He grinned to himself. Maybe it was about time he started making memories. This time, happy ones.

_This is definitely a good start._


	15. Phase 15: Friends, Enemies and a Letter

_**Disclaimer: None of the characters here belong to the author. **_

ïï¾Š **_-- ï_****_ï¾_****_Š -- ï_****_ï¾_****_Š -- ï_****_ï¾_****_Š_**

**_July 11, AW July 12, AW _**

The majestic orange ball rising in the east saw Dearka and Yzak exactly where the moon said goodbye to them about a few hours ago. Neither found anything better to do, what with Cagalli and Athrun busy with building a sand castle all night long and Kira and Lacus out by the water, the pair having started around midnight searching the sand for shells and other interesting objects and had in fact accumulated quite a fairly big pile of colorful stones and corals.

Dearka, Yzak had observed, had done nothing but stare straight into nothingness, possibly lost in thought about a certain Natural girl who was presently sleeping in the van with their dolls. Had it not been for his occasional melancholic sighs, he would have thought his friend had died sitting upright. The Duel pilot, on the other hand, did nothing but enjoy the privacy they were giving him. It was the first time he had actually spent time alone with himself, what with those freaks, Kazui and Sai always popping out of nowhere to torment him. Yes, it was the first time he had actually gotten a chance to think about other important things. And people.

Stretching his legs out into the now cool sand and trying to put out the remaining embers on what was left of their bonfire with it, he looked down at the notepad he had been writing on all night and nodded satisfactorily. This will have to do, as he really did not have anything else to say. Ripping the page loose from the pad, he folded it neatly and inserted it in between the pages of the pad, then stuffed his pen in his shirt pocket.

"A letter to your mother?" Dearka mumbled suddenly.

Yzak jumped, startled at the Buster pilot's sudden revelation that he was, after all, still with them in this mortal coil. He quickly averted his eyes away from him. "You knew?"

Dearka did not bother to look at him while he spoke. "No. But I do, now. You should have just called her. It would have been easier."

Yzak dismissed the idea quickly. There were reasons why he did not bother to call. But he felt that he did not have any obligation to explain this to anyone. Not even to Dearka. Smirking, he grabbed a handful of sand and threw it at his friend. Dearka did not bother to dodge this time, so the sand hit him squarely on the small of his back.

The Buster pilot stared at him dryly over his shoulder and frowned. "Don't you have anything better to do?"

The reaction surprised Yzak. Dearka had been awfully playful and extremely happy for the past weeks, not to mention yesterday when he and Milly had been playing in the water. It had been amusing, watching Dearka splashing in the surf. He looked like he'd been having a good time. But now, he looked like his pet had died.

Yzak shook his head ruefully. Love... what a very confusing emotion. It could turn soldiers into mush in a matter of months. "I just finished my letter, so I really have nothing better to do." The moment those words were out of his mouth did he realize that he actually did have too much time in his hands.

_Without those two lamebrains, I don't have anyone to vent my emotions to, now that I've thought of it..._

Dearka shrugged, not really caring. "Leave me alone."

Yzak's eyebrows climbed up his forehead in astonishment. For someone who'd been insisting for him to lighten up, he sure was being a stick in the mud. Grabbing another handful of sand, he chucked it again at his friend. This time, Dearka dodged it and retaliated by throwing the first thing he'd gotten his hands into; in this case, a heavy-looking rock.

Yzak ducked with a small yelp as the rock zoomed over his head, missing his face by inches. Now that was not funny! "Hey! That would have added to my scar, you fool!" Instinctively, his hand flew to the bridge of his nose, thumbing the puckered part of his skin and scowled. It was only at that time after a long time did he remember that he had it... He hated it, that scar, and at the same time, had grown quite accustomed to having it... _A remembrance of my carelessness, should I call it? Or of something else? _

Dearka shrugged indifferently. His behavior was actually starting to get to Yzak. It was as if his friend based his happiness on this girl. Not that he had anything against it. It was his life after all. But to see him like that... God, it was annoying!

Yzak stood up, brushing his bottom, and slowly made his way to the water, dipping his feet on the salty sea and groaning in contentment at the way the waves washed up to his ankles. He decided that he loved the sea in the morning. It was so quiet and peaceful. "So tell me. What did you ever see in Milly?" he asked casually as he dug his feet into the mushy sand, wriggling his toes leisurely. When he looked over his shoulder, he saw Dearka trying to glare a hole through his head.

"Wouldn't you want to know?" he growled.

The reaction puzzled Yzak. He and Dearka hadn't exactly been getting along that well lately, but it was really the first time he's shown such animosity towards him. He was about to ask him what the heck was wrong, until the reason finally hit him. His eyes widening, he started to chuckle.

Dearka narrowed his eyes at him. "Now what?"

Whirling around and callously kicking water to the very tan boy, he shook his head in disbelief. "Dearka, you are probably the only one who didn't realize that I did not really kiss Miriallia. I put my thumb over her lips and that's what I kissed. Does that make you feel better?"

Yzak watched Dearka struggle for words, but after a while of searching for something smart to say, he finally gave up and tried to hide the relieved reaction crossing his face. In reality, he never really cared much about what his friend felt about the Natural girl, but he did not need to be a Coordinator to notice that what he was feeling was genuine. Dearka also got up and joined him to waddle his feet in water. Now that Yzak has finally confessed, it seemed like as if the Buster pilot started to feel relatively better. Relatively. "The first time I met Miriallia was the _mother _of all terrible of first meetings."

He started to grope around in the water with his feet and bent down to reach out for something. When he straightened up, Yzak saw his fist clutching a few pebbles. He continued with his little talk as he threw his first pebble in the water. It skipped a few times before finally sinking. "The first time I had laid eyes on her, she had been crying. I made a snide remark about her looks while I was being dragged away to my cell. And then as if that wasn't bad enough, when I saw her again in the infirmary, I sneered at her and commented that the reason why she was crying was because she lost her boyfriend in the battle."

Yzak had never really questioned Milly's life before simply because he never really found any use for the information. Call him a soldier that way, but right then he could not help but prod Dearka more about it. "And why was she crying?"

Dearka's face suddenly scrunched up painfully, like he had been sucking on lemons. "Turns out she _did _lose her boyfriend in the battle. He was piloting one of the Sky Graspers of the Archangel... And, well..."

Yzak blinked in disbelief. "No way. Really? You weren't the one who killed him, were you? Because if you were..." It was creepy, having to hear this for the first time.

The Buster pilot was not amused. "_No, _Yzak. I wasn't the one who killed Miriallia's boyfriend."

Yzak sighed in relief. He did not even realize he was holding his breath for his answer. If ever it did happen that Dearka was the one who killed the boyfriend... _God..._ "Does she know?"

"Know what? That I didn't kill him?"

"Yeah?"

"Of course. You think she'll even talk to me if I ever was the one?"

Yzak knew that it was meant as a rhetorical question. But nevertheless, he had an answer. Casting a sidelong glance to his friend, he shrugged. "If we're talking about Milly, I suppose she still will."

Not that he knew Milly for that long anyway. But he could remember the time in Tento Land when she had bothered to help him out... She really was a swell girl. A little too quiet at times, but swell. To forgive, he assumed, must be in her personality.

His remark made Dearka pause, his hand to his side as if to launch his next pebble. His expression was unreadable. After contemplating on Yzak's answer, he resumed in throwing the stone so hard that it skipped out of the Duels pilot's field of view in a matter of seconds. "I suppose you're right. But that's because she's Miriallia. I guess I'm just lucky. Oh, she tried to stab me in the head, by the way."

Yzak stared at him and bent down to gather his own set of rocks to skip with the hand not holding the notepad. "Really now? I don't believe you. Miriallia?"

"Yeah."

"She must have been really upset."

"I could have understood it better if she had just killed me then and there. But what threw me into a loop was the fact that she even bothered to save my life when that girl, Fllay tried to shoot me minutes after her attempt at lodging that knife in my face."

Again with Fllay. Who was she anyway? What is it that keeps on getting her name mentioned in so many conversations... Yzak tried to brush away the thought. It meant little to him anyway. With a grunt, he threw his first pebble and it skipped happily on the surface of the water, leaving ripples glimmering with the reflection of the now yellow sun. Shielding his eyes as he eyed his surroundings, he knew it was going to be a scorcher today. "Then what happened?"

"Then it happened. Miriallia and I, fighting on the same side. And after that, this happened."

Yzak smirked as his eyes landed on a happy-dancing Athrun a few hundred feet away after adding the finishing touches to their sandcastle, which, Yzak admitted to himself, was quite impressive. About three feet tall, with detailed parapets and a very deep moat, it was quite good enough to look at, to say the least. The Justice pilot said something to the princess of Orb, and she nodded happily. And the next thing that happened made Yzak's eyes widen in incredulity. Cagalli and Athrun suddenly jumped up and trampled on the said sandcastle! Of all the things to do for something that you've worked so hard for!

Anyway, it was a momentary distraction. He turned to Dearka, who he discovered was also eyeing Athrun and Cagalli while they played Godzilla in the sand. His friend was smiling a tiny smile. "What I would give to be them."

Yzak scratched his head. "What do you mean by that?"

When Dearka saw that Yzak was staring at him, he shook his head and threw another pebble in the water. It did not skip this time, instead it just sank heavily, making Dearka frown. "Nothing."

"You think Miriallia can't move on?"

Dearka opened his mouth as if to say something, then sighed. "The exact opposite of it, actually. I think she's moving too fast."

That made Yzak dubious. Not that he was an expert when it came to these kind of things, but he sort of knew that the guy should actually be throwing a party when he finds out that the girl he was mooning over was actually willing to move on now. Dropping the stones in his hands, he started to walk back to dry sand. "You're a weird guy."

Dearka skipped another stone, and, abandoning his other pebbles as well, he followed his friend. "Am I really?"

"I'll pretend you never asked me that."

_Love... what a very confusing emotion. It could turn soldiers into mush in a matter of months. I hope that I never ever end up in that predicament..._

ï -- ï -- ï -- ï

Yzak never really remembered his Sunday. It went by in a blur of nothingness and the next thing he knew, it was already Monday and they were back in A.U. Nothing was different when they came back from the beach. Sai and Kazui, of course, almost brawled with them for leaving them behind, but aside from that, nothing was new.

The only thing that changed was the fact that he was clad in black slacks and matching coat; their uniforms had arrived over the weekend and were delivered to their dorms. Not that he was that fussy with his wardrobe – he was used to wearing uniforms anyway – but he was quite uncomfortable with the color. He did not believe it went well with him, what with his light hair. But what annoyed him more was that he had to wear leather shoes. He hated leather shoes. They were so uncomfortable... Oh, well. It did not matter anyway. One has to make do with what was provided.

And so Yzak started his day early by going to school alone in his black uniform and leather shoes, as he did not want to endure another bus ride with Sai and Kazui tailing him. So taking the earliest possible ride to A.U, he set off in the Summer morning, feeling really good that his first class in about two hours or so was Art of War. He decided that he'll while away the hours by just going to the library and maybe scanning his letter to his mother. That's right, _scanning_. She must be really worried about him. Then again, she was always worried about him. He was just so disobedient...

A few minutes later, he finally reached the Campus. It was the first time he had actually gotten there that early. The University was practically deserted and except for a group of girls who were huddled around small tent-like things being erected in the soccer field, there was no one there. He was about to go to the library when his curiosity got the best of him and he approached the welded fence that separated the soccer field from the buildings. "What on Earth are they doing?_"_ he muttered under his breath.

"We're preparing for the Summer Festival."

Yzak almost jumped out of his skin and let a growl escape from his throat as he whirled around to see who the heck the person was who had even dared to sneak up on him like that. At the sight of who it was, however, his hands, which he realized were clenched into fists, immediately dropped to his sides.

She was about a hand shorter than he was, with long reddish-blond hair that fell down the back of her coat and all the way to her knees past her short skirt so straight that Yzak could not believe it was real. Wisps of which framed her smooth pale face, making her skin look so translucent in the morning light that had it not been for her rosy cheeks, a pink mouth and a set of startling green eyes– the only color her plain face, untouched by make-up, had – he could actually have thought she was a ghost.

_A very pretty ghost..._

No one could say that she had what it took to make a guy look at her twice, but she had an air of... simplicity that Yzak found interesting. _She _was different, and although lacking the features that would make any male go crazy, she was, to the Duel pilot, quite fascinating.

He felt his face redden, embarrassed for almost lashing out at her. _Now, what do they do here in Japan to show politeness? Oh right. _He jerkily took an awkward bow and mumbled, "Good morning."

The girl clasped her hands in front of her skirt and smiled. "Good morning. Did I startle you?"

Again, Yzak's eyes wandered to her small hands. Her nails were not painted, and he noticed as she held back her hair, that the only jewelry the girl wore were three silver studs in each ear. And that was all. No necklaces, no anklets, not even a wristwatch.

There was no way he was willing to admit to himself that he had been startled by a Natural, and so he shook his head, trying to regain his poise. "No." And with that, he started to leave. But even before he could walk away from that mysterious girl, he heard her call back to him. "The festival is in two days, Mr. Jule. Will I be seeing you there?"

Yzak froze in mid-stride, his shoulders tensing. What the heck was wrong with him anyway? She was just a Natural girl. Sheesh! "Not really. I'm not into that kind of thing. See you around."

"Oh... well, see you around then." She sounded a bit disappointed, but maybe that was how she normally talked; she had such a solemn face...

And he left. It was only then when he was in the library a few minutes later, did he realize something.

_How on earth did she know my name...?_

Not that he should care about a trivial thing like that. He had spent majority of his time there to escape from Kazui and Sai, but this was the first time he came with the library empty, except, of course, for the young librarian that he did not know the name of. She was most of the time engrossed in her computer and so she never really paid anyone attention except when they wanted to out a book. Considering there wasn't anyone there, he had first dibs on the old fashioned computers lined in the far wall of the room.

In a moment, he was already seated on one of the units, his back to everything else, his notepad and his written letter in hand, ready to slip it inside the scanner, when the hairs at the back of his neck prickled up. This only happened when he sensed a presence lurking nearby...

And he was not wrong.

Wheeling his chair around, his eyes immediately tightened at the sight of three guys, clad in their uniforms, except that they had their coats off, revealing white shirts and on their arms were small tattoos. Yzak assumed that they were a part of a gang of some sort. He had never really seen them around before, but he knew trouble when he saw one. And this was definitely trouble.

His eyes automatically scanned his surroundings, awfully aware that if ever they were going to cause him trouble, he would be able to handle them easily, but not without causing the library a considerable amount of damage.

The guy in the middle, who Yzak assumed was the leader of the group, cocked his spiky red head in a way that made Yzak scowl. Slowly, he got to his feet, cautiously avoiding unnecessary movements. He gingerly placed his notepad and letter on top of the CPU and eyed the three warily. "What do you want?"

His stare was met by the red-head's cat-like green eyes head on. He had a very unpleasant voice, like nails on a chalkboard. "I've seen you around. Always here in the library, always alone. The moment I had laid eyes on you, I knew I wouldn't like you."

Weird preamble. Yzak felt his blood flow fast through his veins and the familiar strain in his neck. He felt it every time he would embark on a mission, back when he was still piloting a Gundam.

He really did not have the time for this. "Really now? Well, _I_ haven't seen _you _around, but now that I have, yeah, I really don't like you either."

He was simply being honest. They really were not that nice to look at, although one of them, the one to the red-head's right did have nice teeth (he was grinning quite sardonically at him) and the one to his left had a nice little nose ring. His enhanced eyesight, however, told him it was a dud; it was obviously a clip-on. What a loser.

Nose-Ring guy sized him up with utmost distaste. "This guy can't possibly be the one you're talking about, Kian. He looks too... normal," he said to the red-head.

_Kian, huh?_

Kian crossed his arms over his chest. "He's one of them, all right."

This time, Yzak lost some of his wariness, immediately replaced by curiosity. What could it be that these three want with him? And what did he mean by _one of them?_

His ears perked up as Perfect-teeth guy spat out his answer. "Coordinators, huh?"

Yzak suddenly felt all the blood from his face drain out... _They know... How could they have known?_

It was weird. Suddenly, the wall that had existed between the Naturals and the Coordinators that had been stowed away in the recesses of his mind was abruptly erected. He had almost forgotten it was there. These three... They knew of him... Of them...

_How...? _ Thoughts of the possibility of Dearka, Athrun and Kira being cornered in school later flashed through his mind's eye. Not that he was worried. Those three could easily handle it. But what if they go all out and corner the girls?

Kian sneered, wisely keeping a considerable distance from him. If he knew what he was, then he should now better. "You came here when the cease-fire began, you and your _kind_. Trying to belong, trying to act all _innocent. _Trying to wash your hands of all the blood you've spilled."

Yzak calmly listened to Kian's words as every uttered syllable dripped with obvious hatred. He really did not know what to say. The last thing he actually wanted was to get into a history lesson of what had really happened, since he was quite knowledgeable of the fact that the people living in Hokkaido were pretty much sheltered from the real events of the war, he decided that ignorance for this bully's part was forgivable. His deadpanned expression and silence, however, was taken in a different manner. Kian probably thought he was mocking him.

The red-headed boy's mouth twisted into an ugly frown. Yzak was slightly amused. He was honestly curious on what the guy was planning, considering they were in a library, and the librarian was already staring at them suspiciously.

But his curiosity was immediately replaced by surprise when the last person he was expecting to come to his "rescue" was a certain petite girl with silky-smooth red-blond hair and startling green eyes. _Her again..._

She came out of nowhere, appearing from behind the three like a fleeting phantom. Yzak felt his heart race at the mere sight of her. Was she following him?

The girl's voice was firm, yet gentle. Her expression was not any different from how it was when they had first met, but there was a certain light in her eyes that told him she was seriously upset.

"Leave him alone, Kian," she said, gliding in between Yzak and the three, facing the red-headed bully. Yzak ended up staring at the top of her head with utmost surprise. _Who is this girl anyway?_

Kian waved his hand away. "Stay out of this, Kari. This really doesn't concern you."

_Kari... Kari is her name..._

"I've had enough of this bitterness. Stop looking for someone to blame. It's over. Try to deal with that like a man."

The Duel pilot blinked in astonishment. The truth was, he had kind of assumed that this Kian character had issues regarding Coordinators, but what? And what is this with Kari? His eyes went from the girl defending him, then at the bully. Now what?

Kian's cheeks flared with indignation, teeth obviously grinding angrily. "Fine. But this doesn't end it." He stared daggers at Yzak. "I don't know what you're doing here, Coordinator. But I will not have it that you run around freely in this country like as if you belong. You and your kind can never belong!" And with that, he turned on his heel and was gone as fast as he came, his two cronies lagging behind him.

The outburst did not upset Yzak, but the fact that someone had somehow "threatened" not simply himself, but his very existence, made him uneasy. It did not matter. He was used to it. War did that to you. You will always be used to hostility. This did not mean, however, that he liked it.

The girl turned to face her with her solemn expression, then took a deep bow. "Forgive my brother. He is still very... depressed about the war."

Somehow, the fact that this really meek girl having such a relationship with a brute like that made him even more uneasy than the threat. But he should have noticed it earlier; both had red hair and green eyes... "Whatever. You really did not have to step in."

The girl, Kari, straightened and pushed the few fine strands of her beautiful hair – Yzak could still not get over the fact on how unnaturally silky it was – then shook her head slowly. "He had always been like that. Call him a bully if you wish. But he normally is a nice guy."

"I hadn't noticed. If you'll excuse me, I have something I have to do before your brother so rudely interrupted me." He hated it, having to be this uneasy when he talked to her. This was not him at all. He turned to his chair and plopped down on it, already focused on the monitor.

From behind him, he heard her speak. "I suppose you're not going to thank me for standing up to you?"

Yzak snorted, not even bothering to turn to face her. He started to type rapidly on the keyboard and snatched the notepad and letter from the top of the CPU. "I didn't ask you to help me out. But if it's going to make you feel any better, thanks." Man, he could have kicked himself for being that rude!

What surprised Yzak was that the girl was not at all offended. In fact, she laughed gaily. "I guess you're right. I'm sorry for being too assuming. But I really am sorry. Goodbye."

"Wait!" Yzak tried to pull back the words he had shouted out, one, because the librarian suddenly shushed him loudly, and two, because he did not know why he had done so it in the first place.

She stopped in mid-stride – she was about to walk away – and then turned her green eyes to him. "Do you need anything?"

Yzak swallowed and immediately racked his brain for something to say. "Uh, well, not really. I just wanted to ask you... how did you know my name?"

The girl smiled meekly. "I suppose I had that coming. No one really can remember who I am. We share a class, Mr. Jule."

The fact made him almost fall off his chair. "We do?"

"I'm practically invisible to everyone. I sit in the back row in Art of War. I always see you coming in late, and you will always take the leftmost chair in the front."

Yzak frowned. How come he's never noticed her before? "Oh, right. You. Yeah. Now I remember," he lied.

"You don't have to lie to me. I know you don't know me really. But anyway, see you around." And then she was gone.

The Duel pilot stared after her and sighed to himself. What a weird girl. Turning his chair to face the computer, he slipped the letter into the scanner...

ï **-- ï -- ï -- ï**

That night in PLANT, Ezaria had a reason to smile. Checking her laptop was a message that came from the most important person in her life.

It was a scanned letter of her son's very messy handwriting. He has always had very untidy penmanship... It didn't matter. The attachment could have been written on tissue paper and she still would not have cared.

The letter went like this:

_July 10_

_Mother,_

_I am well_

_I wanted you to now that, first and foremost before I begin this long letter, so as to put your heart to rest. Your disobedient son is fine here on Earth._

_Next in my list of preambles, I would like to apologize for my means of communication. I could have called you, but my living arrangements here on Earth are a bit inconvenient, and privacy is a luxury I cannot afford right now. "Why?" you may probably be asking. Do not worry. It is simply because I am stuck in a dorm room with two moronic people who are experiencing the post-rebel blues (they really cannot find anything better to do with their time than to torment me.) I will manage somehow._

_But you know as well as I, mother, that I cannot lie to you. So I will not lie now. I am really quite happy to have them around. They seem to love to laugh a lot. It is... definitely a change. I have never been surrounded by this much happy people in my life. They seem to make life appear simpler and a lot more enjoyable than I thought it would be. Also I could have just typed this and sent it to you but I know how much you enjoy picking on my handwriting that I did not want to spoil the fun for you, so I scanned my letter instead. _

_But enough about me. How are you? How are the PLANTs? I had wanted to know of everything about the events taking place at home, but this country, it shields its youth from the events of war, so I could not get hold of information about the peace talks. Please inform me of the progress of the truce as soon as possible._

_(lots of erasures)_

_As I write this letter, I am sitting in front of a fire on the sand near the sea. I am here with my (lots of erasures) "friends", shall I call them, since they are my enemies no longer. Dearka is with me, so know that I am safe. He seems quite taken with a Natural girl. I had never seen him act this way before, so I pretty much leave him to his own strategies, but from my point of view, it's a losing battle. It is entirely new to him, as it is for me. Everything here is so peaceful. One time I even found myself singing in the shower! Believe me, however unbelievable it may be. I had heard it on the radio when I woke up one morning. It is an old song entitled "Can't Smile Without You". I was singing along with it because I remembered you._

_I miss you, mother._

_But I am learning a lot here. Yes, I am presently attending University. It is quite amusing. I am studying with Naturals, people who I used to hate with my life, mingling with them, being under the same roof with them, living with them, even!_

_But do you know, mother, that I cannot see the difference?_

_Getting hit in the face with a volleyball hurts me as much as it hurts them. Thinking about them, I keep on questioning everyone on why the war even began... what a waste of energy that was. And lives. But I suppose everything has a reason. There is definitely a reason for this one. I wonder what It could be._

_Something is wrong with me, mother. I'm afraid I am getting soft. A soldier is supposed to be strong. And you have raised me to be strong. This is the reason why I keep my feelings to myself; because I know feelings are weapons other people can use against me. But I cannot help it... Not here... I could even find myself smiling and laughing once in a while, enjoying myself with what I'm doing without having to be constantly of an alarm sounding an attack._

_I do hope you enjoy the same peace I am feeling now. It is a very nice feeling._

_When the peace talks are over, I wish to take you here on Earth. You will be surprised at the difference between a planet and a space colony. Everything is real here. Or at least where I am staying._

_(more erasures)_

_I could not think of anything else to say, as of now, so I will have to end it here. Know that I think of you constantly._

_Be safe._

_Your Son, _

_Yzak_

_PS. I have learned to ride a bike._

ï _-- ï -- ï -- ï_

__

**_Thank you for the reviews. And for the advice. Your requests will be considered, all right? _**

**_Again thanks to those who gave constructive criticism. Seriously, thanks._**


	16. Phase 16: This Isn't Good

_**Disclaimer: None of the characters here belong to the author.**_

* * *

****

July 11, AW

Miriallia woke up that Monday morning with a fever. She did not know how on earth she got it; she was feeling pretty fine yesterday, but now, she felt hot, her head was aching and her throat was itchy. It was probably because of the weather, scorching hot in the morning, and freezing cold at night. She hated it. Now she had to stay home alone. And to think she was really looking forward to going to school, as she had signed up for the Summer Festival preparations committee along with Lacus and Cagalli. (They had forced the princess to join.)

And now, she was basically left with nothing to do but sit on the couch in her pj's with a cold towel on her forehead and the remote control in her hand, Lacus' very bland porridge sitting on the center table, forgotten. She didn't even have Stephanie with her. The moment the songstress and the princess found out she was sick, they immediately hauled the dolls away from her for disinfecting and had left in a hurry after getting dressed in their new uniforms, taking Cathrun, Akira and Stephanie with them.

Miriallia sighed. Well, at least something good turned out today. She didn't have to wear that short, pleated skirt. It was _way _too short. How do Japanese girls even manage to wear that, anyway? One time, she even saw one riding a bike in it!

Oh, well. Staring at the screen that now showed a very fat man running around in circles (what the heck was he doing?), she finally gave up and turned the tube off. Which was a bad idea. Now she was engulfed in a very unbearable silence forcing her to listen to her throbbing head. Stifling a groan, she curled up into a ball, snatching the wet towel from her head and letting it drop on the carpeted floor. They really had to get rid of that carpet. It was already too warm to have one around.

Getting up, she tried to look around for something to do. Which was also a bad idea. Her world started to spin the moment she tried to pick up the bowl of forgotten porridge and she hurriedly sat down on the couch again. Great. So now she was fated to probably sleep all day and do nothing. And she hated doing nothing.

She pulled at her hair in frustration. Which, again, was another bad idea, as the act sent jolts of pain through her skull. Now what was she to do? She had to do something to keep her mind occupied. She _desperately _needed it. If she did not keep herself busy… she will start thinking about things she did not want to think about, things she **_must not_** think about…

About Dearka…

Just then, the phone rang. Miriallia jumped, startled. But she reached over to the side table and grabbed the cordless phone, grateful for the distraction.

"Hello?"

"_Hello? Miriallia?"_

Miriallia paused for a while, until she finally realized who it was. "Captain Ramius! Hello!"

"_Just call me Murrue, Milly. We don't have to be that formal," _Murrue's happy voice floated clearly over the receiver, then she paused before continuing. _"Wait a minute. Why are you at home? Don't you have classes today?" _

Milly laughed softly. "I'm sick, Murrue," she said the name quite awkwardly. "Cagalli and Lacus told me to stay home, so I did."

"_Are you all right?"_

"Nothing serious. Just a fever. Where are you calling from?"

"_From Orb. Sorry I wasn't able to call you guys earlier. Things are… happening around here…"_

Miriallia felt the strain in the former captain's voice and she instantly began to worry. "Is something wrong? What happened?"

There was a long pause on the other end of the line before Murrue tried to save it with an uneasy laugh. _"Don't be silly, Milly. Hey! That rhymed!" _

"Something's wrong, isn't there?"

Another long pause. _"To tell you honestly, things aren't going as smoothly as we planned."_

"Is it about the peace talks?"

"_No! The peace talks are going along fine, although it's going really slow, as the council in PLANT seem to be lacking quorum. They say that there is a bit of reshuffling in the council. They've been really transparent about it. It seems that they're having a hard time finding a temporary replacement for their former chairman, and of course other members. They didn't go much on detail, but that's understandable. You already know why. But aside from that delay, communication between Orb, EA and the PLANTs are pretty much friendly."_

Miriallia frowned, then winced as the expression made her head throb more. "Then what's wrong?"

She heard Murrue sigh deeply. _"Andy and Erica did not bring much good news to us."_

Mirirallia shifted the phone from one ear to another and cleared her itchy throat. Yes, she remembered that Andy and Erica were working with Dellit and the Human Resource Development in holding forums in shelters here on Earth. What could be wrong? "Don't tell me there's something wrong with their forums…"

"_I'm afraid there is."_

"Why?"

"_Oh, Milly. You know pretty well why. Sometimes, peace… it just isn't enough. Lives were lost. Countless lives. Not many are willing to forgive, more so forget. The only problem we have right now, is that we really can't blame them."_

Suddenly, memories of Tolle flooded her already heavy head and heart. _In a war, we can't help but point fingers. But I always thought that peace would be more than enough to make things better. _

The mere thought, she knew, was purely idealistic. Many out there had suffered, and God only knew that they did not deserve it. But because tracing back the root cause of what really had happened was too much of a bother for people who were hurting, it always was easier to find someone to blame. Sometimes, complaining, crying and bitching can bring unexpected comfort to people. But Miriallia knew that even though it did bring comfort, it really would not change anything. But in a way, that made her a hypocrite. She, after all, used to be engulfed in such bitterness when Tolle had died.

But right now, she was surprising herself with her feelings and actions. How long has it been, anyway? Two months? Three? Was it really just that short a time since she's lost him? She had been holding it back. She was trying to be strong for everyone around her. That had to be the reason. Because every time she would look at Cagalli and Lacus, who had both lost a very important loved one, and would see them happy, she would feel ashamed, because they can handle the pain so casually, and so naturally. And here she was, trying about ten times as hard to hold her feelings back with a wall, that she knew that if she stopped trying, she would completely break down and cry. And she was afraid to cry; she was afraid that if she started, she will never be able to stop…

She loved Tolle. She could not remember not having her in her life…

But loving him forever was stupid, she knew. And then, when she thought everything was going to be all right, the war ended only to be replaced by a new battle. A personal battle. She knew that these feelings she was starting to develop for Dearka were not normal. How could it be? Her boyfriend was killed in a battle! Shifting feelings from one person to another was difficult. It was not anything like having your goldfish die, so you'll get a new one. Right?

But then… if so… why was she having them?

"_Hello? Hello? Are you still there?"_

Miriallia snapped back to reality at the sound of a very worried Murrue. Blinking at the receiver for a moment, she sighed. "Murrue? Can I ask you something?"

"_Hmm. You sound serious."_

"I am."

"_Ask away."_

"Murrue, you seem happy enough right now. And it's hardly been a month… But I kind of wanted to ask you… How did you get over Mwu?"

There was a very, very long pause on the other end of the line.

"H-hello?" Miriallia stammered uncertainly.

"_I'm here, Milly. I heard you. I was just a little surprised by your question. I definitely did not see that coming."_

"Sorry. You don't have to answer it."

"_Well, to tell you honestly, I'm not over it."_

The answer wasn't really the one that surprised her. It was the _way _she had answered. She sounded like as if they were talking about the weather. "You're not? Then… why -?"

"_Why do I sound like as if I am?"_

"Yeah."

"_That's because I try very, very hard. It wasn't easy. To tell you honestly, I still spend sleepless nights crying over it, and I would find myself wishing and praying that it was not true. But the bitter reality is, he's really gone. There's nothing I can do about it."_

Miriallia bit her lip nervously. Was she the only one who felt that way? Was she the only one who was actually torn between having to live up to the standard of human emotions and what she was genuinely feeling? "Murrue? I think I'm starting to have feelings for this person… and I think it isn't right, because Tolle, he hasn't been gone that long, and I know I should feel bad about it. Don't get me wrong. I do feel bad about it, but this person… he's always there for me… and well… I think he feels for me, too. But now I'm having really guilty feelings because I think I shouldn't even be considering this…"

Long pause again, then she spoke. _"Are we talking about that young boy who piloted the Buster?"_

Miriallia gasped. "How…?"

She ignored her question altogether. _"So let me get this clear. You're having a hard time assessing your feelings because you **know** that you're **supposed **to grieve for a long time before you finally love again. But then you're thinking that 'hey! There's something wrong with me because I'm starting to develop feelings for this other guy this early'. Am I correct?"_

"Well… sort of…"

With that, she laughed. _"Milly! There's nothing wrong with you!"_

"But, Murrue! It's too soon!"

"_And who are you to say that it's too soon? Milly, you can't let your heart follow a schedule. You can't say 'okay! I'm not going to go out with anyone until after two years or so', because you really cannot say when, where or how you're going to be all right. There are some people whose wives or husbands have died who start dating after a couple of months, while there are others who start after several years. Some don't even date at all. People have a different pace when it comes to that. You just happen to heal faster than everyone else. In this case, faster than me."_

"But I'm not healed! I know that deep down, I still think about Tolle, but then there are times when I can't help but think about Dearka…"

"_Because it's easier to think about Dearka since he's there, right?"_

It sounded too embarrassing to say. "Yes."

"_Because he fills the void?"_

"Somehow…"

"_There's nothing wrong with you. Your feelings for Dearka right now, however uncertain they may be, does not say that you had loved Tolle any less than you really had. What you feel right now does not make you a bad person, or a bad girlfriend to Tolle. We can never really control what we feel, but we do have control on our actions that are inspired by them. Do you understand?"_

Miriallia blinked. She had never really thought of it that way. She knew that she felt something for Dearka, might it be love or whatever, but whatever it may be, it definitely was **_something_**. "I guess I do."

"_But as I said, Milly. Although our feelings are pretty much hard to control, we should have responsibility over our actions."_

This time, Miriallia did not understand. Frowning, she cleared her throat again. "What do you mean?"

"_It means that although our feelings pretty much confuse us, we have to put into consideration what others might feel as well. That's called empathy. Like for example, what Dearka feels. Sure, you know that perhaps he will always be there for you, because he cares for you. But then, it would be unfair for him if you end up returning the gesture simply because he just happened to be there when you're hurting."_

With this, Miriallia found herself blushing. And it had nothing to do with the fever. "You mean like a rebound?"

"_Hmm, well, something with the same concept, I suppose."_

"I would never - !" The protest was cut short with Murrue's laughter.

"_You get the picture, Ms. Haww. You don't have to get all agitated. In reality, I'm really envious. What I would give to have a person who would have caught me when I fell. You should be thankful. You were given a person to help you by causing so much problems you forget majority of the time that you're supposed to be sad."_

Miriallia did not know how to respond to that, simply because it was true. Everything she said was true. Everything. She found herself shrugging, then curling up in the sofa with the phone cradled between her shoulder and ear. "Thanks, Murrue. You really helped."

"_Really? I kind of thought I sounded too preachy."_

Miriallia laughed. "Just a bit. You actually sounded like a mother."

"_Yes, well. I think being a captain of a ship full of teens make you somewhat of a mother, right?"_

"I suppose."

This time, Miriallia heard a bit of talking in the background and Murrue shouting that she'll be along in a minute. Then she sighed and said, "_I have to go, Milly. We're discussing about what we're to do with whatever remaining mobile suits both parties have. Are you going to be all right?_"

"Yes, Murrue. I'll be fine." She honestly believed it, too.

"_Good. Drink plenty of liquids. Tell everyone I said hi. I'll try to call again sometime this week to inform you of the progress. Be careful, okay? There are a lot of people who seem to think that Coordinators are shit, or so what Andy and Erica's survey had reported. So be on your guard."_

"We will. Goodbye."

"_Goodbye." _And the line went dead.

Miriallia shuddered as she replaced the receiver back on the side table. That last warning… it surely left something to think about. Sinking back in the couch with a groan, she stared up at the ceiling, feeling suddenly lonely. She hated being alone. Especially when she was alone with her thoughts.

All that Murrue said to her, everything sank in. Well, it sort of made her feel better, knowing that there really isn't anything wrong with her. Not that that was enough, of course. Still, guilty feeling nagged at her stomach. Why on earth did she have to be tormented by so many things?

She almost fell off the couch when she heard someone knock on the door. Thinking that it was probably Cagalli coming back for something she forgot, she called out for her to come in.

Unfortunately, it wasn't Cagalli.

It was someone else…

She swallowed hard. "Dearka…? What are you doing here?"

The Buster pilot was standing there, looking really… un-Dearka-like in black slacks and a matching coat. A heavy-looking watermelon hanging from a small net was in one of his hands, and the other was scratching his head. "I heard from Cagalli you were sick and so I thought I'd cut classes and see you. Are you supposed to be out of bed?"

Miriallia bit her lip nervously, trying to think about something to say. "It's just a fever. It's nothing serious, you know."

"Actually, I don't know. Haven't had one before. It must suck. Here. I brought you something." He made his way to the kitchen and deposited the fruit in the sink. "Do you want to have some now, or would you rather have some later?"

She blinked as she watched him cross the kitchen when she didn't reply and settled on sitting on the carpeted floor, directly in front of her. It was such an awkward position, with her being on the couch and him on the floor. She had to stare down at him and craning her neck that far made her head hurt. Unconsciously, she rubbed her temple and groaned. "Dearka, you shouldn't have come here."

"Why not?" he asked, crossing his legs comfortably, and then he started to remove one of his shoes (Leather shoes?). When he saw her staring at him, he stopped and uneasily spoke, "Can I take off my shoes? My feet hurt."

Miriallia tilted her head to the side and nodded. Another jolt of pain through her skull. "All right. Where is Stephanie?"

"I didn't bring her with me. Athrun and Kira volunteered to take care of her while Lacus and Cagalli are busy with the Festival. You signed up for that too, right?"

Miriallia grinned as she continued to watch him struggle with his shoes. The degree of happiness in seeing him surprised her. Maybe she really just hated being alone. And maybe because she wasn't expecting him to drop by this early. But nonetheless, she felt a little better, if not well enough for her fever to go down. And as she watched him successfully remove his footwear, a very fulfilled expression on is face, the talk she had with Murrue all came back to her.

_You can't let your heart follow a schedule…_

Miriallia sighed as she continued to observe Dearka wriggle his feet contentedly in his black socks. Maybe she really wasn't ready to move on. Not yet. But then, why did she feel like this towards him…?

…_It means that although our feelings pretty much confuse us, we have to put into consideration what others might feel as well. It's called empathy. Like for example, what Dearka feels. Sure, you know that perhaps he will always be there for you, because he cares for you. But then, it would be unfair for him if you end up returning the gesture simply because he just happened to be there when you're hurting… _

_I owe you as much, Dearka…_she thought to herself. Slowly, she lowered herself to the carpeted floor and although it sent shock waves of pain through her cranial cavity, she did not care.

"Hey!" the Buster pilot exclaimed. "What are you doing?"

She smiled solemnly. "I want to talk to you."

He paused, then frowned. "Us? Talk? But we don't talk, Miriallia. We can't. We'd always end up in uncomfortable silences, or with the word 'oh'. And haven't we analyzed the little mermaid word per word already?"

"If you don't want to talk, then can you just listen to me?"

That kept him quiet. Slowly, however uncertainly, he nodded. "All right."

…_You don't have to get all agitated. In reality, I'm really envious. What I would give to have a person who would have caught me when I fell. You should be thankful. You were given a person to help you by causing so much problems you forget majority of the time that you're supposed to be sad…_

_But then thinking of you that way is unfair for you. No, that can't be right. You're more than just someone who just happened to be there…_

Taking a deep breath, her heart surprisingly calm, she began to speak "Tolle and I first met a long time ago…"

* * *

Yzak found himself staring down at those startling green eyes after Art of War class. It was her again, a thick filer tucked under her left arm, and a big bag of plain M & M's in the hand that did not carry her laptop. Again, he started to wonder why she was suddenly there. She had caught up to him by the stairs where a stream of noisy students was rushing up and down to their respective classrooms. She was worse than Sai and Kazui, who, by the way, haven't been seen around all morning. This was the third time today that he had seen himself with her, but it was like seeing her again for the first time. For some weird reason, there was something that he felt was… off about her.

Yzak narrowed his eyes at her still blank face. "I don't want to be rude, but are you somehow following me?"

"Actually, yes."

The answer startled Yzak. He was not expecting to have such a confession. "And why, may I ask, are you doing that?"

"You fascinate me."

The Duel pilot blinked in disbelief. Was this girl for real? "_Why?_"

Kari blinked back at him. "I'm sorry."

Now Yzak was irritated. "For what?" He swore, this conversation was going nowhere. "Look, I really don't have time for this. If you need anything, just tell me now and I might actually consider helping you."

His bluntness did not bother her. Instead, a slow smile broke the deadpanned expression on her ever oh so placid face. "I am taking up a major in Psychology, and this semester, my thesis was offered, so I enrolled in it in order for me to be able to work on it better. My professor approved my topic, and so I need subjects to help me pull it through. You are one of them in my list."

Again, her straightforwardness at answering his questions surprised him. It was starting to sound amusing, really. "Wait a minute. Let me get this clear. I'm _one _of those in your _list_?" He frowned. "And who exactly are the _others _in your _list_?"

The girl's facial expression did not change. "Kira Yamato, Lacus Clyne, Dearka Elthman, Athrun Zala and two others you don't know."

The wheels in Yzak's brain began to immediately search for the common denominator in her list. At first, he would have thought that it had something to do with Coordinators, but since her list involved two others, he discarded the idea completely. He shook his head. "I don't want to be your guinea pig. So you'll have to look for someone else to take my place."

She tilted her head to the right, her unnaturally silky straight red-blond hair swishing like a cape down her back. "Aren't you the least bit curious of what my thesis is about?"

Yzak paused, then stared at the girl suspiciously. It was as if she could read his mind. She had known that he had been lying about not really knowing her, and now this. He did not want to keep on looking like a complete fool in front of her, so he shrugged and said, "I guess I am a bit curious."

That made her smile, squeezing at the bag of M & M's lightly. Yzak's eyes drifted to it a split second. Why the heck was she carrying so many chocolate candies, anyway?

This time, Kari did not wait for him to ask it out loud. "I teach a freshman class every Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. These here is positive reinforcement in the form of sweet nibbles. They seem to listen better with a bag of treats around."

This time the Duel pilot could not hide his awe. "How the heck did you know I was thinking about that?"

She shrugged again. She seemed to love to shrug a lot. "Your eyes flew to the bag a brief moment, as if you did not want me to know you were staring, then I sort of noticed your eyebrows scrunch up a bit, pretty much how they did when Kian and his cronies started hassling you. I've been so used to reading body language for over two and a half years. It didn't even have to take that much training to know what you're thinking, Mr. Jule. You are very easy to read."

Yzak did not know whether to take that in a bad way. He had never met anyone who had bothered to "read" his actions. He was starting to realize he did not want to be around her anymore. Hiding your feelings from someone who was an expert when it came to flushing them out was definitely not the most compatible person for him. He stuffed his hands in his pocket and looked away down the hall, pretty much at nothing. "Can I go now?"

"If you want to. But then again, you could have easily walked away earlier, so I could tell you're waiting for me to tell you something, as you're still here." She slowly hugged the laptop to her chest and began fiddling with the bag of M & M's. "My thesis is about _Positive and Negative Psychological Effects of Genetic Alteration to Children._"

At the sound of that, Yzak's mouth went dry. And he knew as hell that it showed in his face, because Kari was staring up at him with a sad, almost sympathetic expression. _How did she know about us anyway?_ _How did her brother know? _He recovered fast enough to scowl at her. "Oh, I see. You're here to make a project out of Coordinators. _What the heck is wrong with you?_" He did not realize he was shouting at her. He could not believe how much it had upset him. He definitely did not feel like he was overreacting with this. This girl was going to make freak examinations and interviews of them as if they were rats!

The calm expression never left her face. There was absolutely no sign of shame in her eyes. "You seem to be grossly mistaken, Mr. Jule. I said my thesis is about genetic _alteration_. Not genetic _enhancement_. You were the one who jumped into the conclusion that Coordinators are different from Naturals. Not I. Personally, I see no difference. People are people to me."

"And I suppose that there's a big difference between _enhancement_ and _alteration_?" Yzak spat out. He did not care that other people were starting to stare at them. They could all go to hell if they wanted. He was really pissed off! His hands in his pockets were starting to clench into fists.

"There is a big difference, to tell you honestly. To be fair to you, since I know about you and you know nothing of me, I am not genetically enhanced, but I, myself, am genetically altered." She smiled as if she had just announced that she was going to be holding a party tomorrow night. "My mother is Mrs. Kimberly Takano. She's the guidance councilor of A. U. As you can see, I don't look anything like her."

Yzak stared at her in disbelief. The rage he was feeling was immediately extinguished by the revelation. "You…? You were altered?"

She nodded. "Yes. I think it used to be a very expensive and utterly vain fad during those times when my mother had conceived of me. There are others like me here in A. U. Mostly sent here from different countries by their parents to live a 'normal' life, so they say."

At that moment, he felt he was going to be sick… "But… you're a Natural?"

"I never really knew the answer to that question. I don't want to go much on detail here and now. It would be better if we waited for your other friends, so I will not have to repeat myself over to them." And she ripped the bag of chocolates neatly, stuffed her hand inside and shoved a handful of colorful candy-covered chocolates a few inches from his nose. "Positive reinforcement?"

He did not know whether to laugh or cry at her behavior, but he found himself putting out his hand to accept the colorful little treats. At least now he knew why she looked so unnatural. It was because she wasn't a an ordinary Natural at all, if there is such a thing. But then, she's not a Coordinator either, is she? If so, then where did she belong to? So many questions, so little patience for him to find out the answers.

Kari started to roll up the bag and continued to look at him. "You want to ask something else?"

Yzak sneered. "Why don't you just _read _me?"

"Because I read body language, not minds," she said in a very neutral voice.

And yet again, he became fully aware that it irritated him, her serenity. He actually began to wonder what she'll do if he suddenly yanked at her long hair, or maybe poked her in the eye. Would her expression change at all? So far, she hasn't shown a single sign of disgust about his rude comments and behavior. But maybe she was already so used to that, what with her course.

He stared down at the M & M's in his hand. The too warm weather was making them melt into a very sticky rainbow in his palm. He cringed inwardly. He never really did like sweets. "I should get going." He really had no classes after Art of War and normally, he'd spend his vacant hours in the library (because Kazui and Sai – where the heck were they anyway? He hoped to God they weren't planning anything – wouldn't dare follow him there.) But today, it seemed like he was going to be paying a short visit to the kind Guidance Councilor.

Kari nodded. "I will be seeing you around, then. To give you an outline of my thesis." And she glided away silently amid the now very crowded hall of people hurrying to their next class. Yzak didn't bother to see her off. But suddenly he remembered something he had to clear out. He will not take part in a damned thesis! He whirled around, ready to call after her, only to discover that she was no longer there.

_What the…? That girl. What else is there that they _altered _in her_? He shook his head and walked away, and when he came across a trash can, he slowed down and chucked the "positive reinforcements" into it.

* * *

****

Kira and Athrun were sitting under what little shade one of the now-green Cherry Blossom trees lining the eastern part of the soccer field, legs crossed and foreheads glistening with sweat under the heat. Akira, Stephanie and Cathrun were comfortably nestled in their baby carriers, letting out an occasional _googoo, _or _baa-boo _when a breeze blew only to leave them wishing for more.

Man, summers were hot here! Kira could not believe those girls could actually stand the heat in the middle of the soccer field. With this, his eyes scanned the crowd of girls in very short skirts running around with big boxes in their arms, colorful paper and props spilling everywhere, fondly searching for a familiar pink head of hair. He saw her instantly, talking to Cagalli happily. Her ponytail was a mess, with lots of strands escaping the blue scrunchie she tied it with. Even Cagalli, whose hair she normally just wore down, was held back by a clip. It was the heat, he knew. Cagalli will never wear something like that for mere vanity.

"Guess what?" Athrun said, stretching his legs out into the grass lazily.

"What?" Kira asked.

"You know that music class I'm taking? Piano and all that?"

Kira raised his eyes to him, wiping his brow with the back of his hand. He needed to get out of the sun. It was too hot there. "Yeah. I heard you're doing pretty well with your piano." He smiled. "Nicol would have been proud."

The Justice pilot smiled. It was not the sad smile he usually reserved every time he remembered his young friend. This time, he looked happy. "I know. Well, this Summer Festival thing is in two days and my music teacher wants me to play a part in the mini concert that'll open the night's celebration on Wednesday."

"Really? That's great!" Kira socked his shoulder playfully. "Never saw that coming. You must have the talent. You've been on that for what? A week or so? And she's asked you to do a part? That's great."

He shrugged, suddenly feeling embarrassed. "Nah. I think the reason why she let me play is because no one else would take the part and she's desperate to have an opening act. So I'll be the sacrificial lamb."

Kira laughed. "You nervous?"

"A bit."

"You'll do good. Although I can't really imagine you playing the piano." He looked back at Lacus who was now talking to this unfamiliar girl with very, very long reddish-blonde hair. She was probably the one in charge of the thing. Suddenly, an idea hit him. "Hey. Why don't you ask Lacus to perform with you? She sings really well, doesn't she?"

Athrun's eyes widened at the thought. "Oh, right! I think that'll be a good idea. Now I don't have to play alone on stage." He grinned and started to look a little better. "Maybe this won't be so bad after all. The audience will be so entranced by her voice that they won't notice how bad I play."

Kira tried to say something to make him feel better, but if his friend wanted to put himself down in order to feel happy, he was not going to stop him. Stretching his arms over his head, he lied down on the grass and closed his eyes as the sun tried to peek through the leaves of the trees. Maybe he could go and nap for a while. His class doesn't begin until after lunch anyway. The reason why they were there, actually, was to wait for the girls so that all of them could have lunch together. "Wake me up when they're here, okay?"

There was a long pause before Athrun spoke, but when he did, he sounded serious. Dead serious. "Kira, get up. We have company."

"Huh?" the Freedom pilot grunted as he propped himself up on his elbows, and his eyes immediately fell on what Athrun was referring to. There, about a few feet away from them, were three guys slowly approaching. Kira felt his shoulders tense as he watched the three move. It was the first time he had actually seen them around.

He squinted as the sun made the red hair of the guy in the middle seem like it was on fire. Even at that distance, he could tell he had startling green eyes and an insolent mouth that made look like he did not smile often. He supposed the guy was good-looking, but then again, he wouldn't know. He was a guy, after all. He was probably a few inches taller than Kira, with shoulders good enough to belong to a basketball player.

Then his eyes drifted to the guy's companion standing to his left. He really was not the kind you could remember the first time you saw him. With dark hair cleanly cut above his collar and neatly shaved at the sides, he did not look like the type of guy who would be hanging around with what obviously looked like a gang. But one thing's for sure, the guy could easily pass off as a toothpaste commercial mode; the sun was reflecting on his pearly white teeth when he smiled at something the redhead said.

The one in the right looked like he was a wrestler, tall as he was wide, with a shaved head and a very bored expression that did not seem to change whether or not he smiled. He was that kind of guy whose laughter did not reach his eyes. Kira would actually have been wary of him, had it not been for that nose-ring that was obviously fake. It looked really silly on him.

Kira could tell Athrun was eyeing them cautiously as he was, already rolling all the possibilities about this encounter. Old habits were hard to break. He felt like he was analyzing an enemy mobile suit. The hairs at the back of his neck started to stand on end as he sensed trouble. This was not good. The last thing he wanted was to get into an argument with someone he didn't know and for a reason that was obviously oblivious to him. At least not in this heat. He would give anything to nap for half an hour at least.

"Don't look now, but they brought back up." Athrun jerked his head to the right and Kira gritted his teeth when he saw what his friend was referring to. Behind almost every tree in the eastern soccer field were boys, trying to be stealthy, but were failing miserably. They were with the red-head. He was sure of it.

_What do they want? _

Oh, screw it. He warily got to his feet and heard Athrun follow suit. Whatever it was, he was not liking it.

And behind them, the dolls began to cry.


	17. Phase 17: The Clasping of Hands

_**Author's Note: Thank you for the reviews and for the offers for proofreading. I really am quite embarrassed for having to bother you. I was not able to ask you to proofread this one chapter because it is quite long. The next chapter, I will be asking much of your help... So please until then, bear with my errors... :) Know that I will put into consideration your requests. **_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed.**_

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_**July 11, AW**_

Lacus wiped her perspiring forehead with her already damp handkerchief as she took a breather under the small shade of one of the ten tents that were already erected in the middle of the very spacious soccer field. She and Cagalli had started helping out about a couple of hours earlier, and she felt like her hair was in flames. After being exposed under that really nasty sun, she did not know if anyone would be able to make her budge from that spot. She found herself smiling when Cagalli joined her a minute later.

"I'm boiling in my own sweat. This place is worse than the desert," she complained, handing Lacus one of the water bottles she had in her hands.

"Thank you," Lacus said as she gratefully took the cool water bottle from her and pressed it to her forehead, sighing at the comforting, yet fleeting coolness it brought. "It really is hot today, but I think things are looking good." With this, she scanned their progress. It was not bad at all.

Ten colorful tents stood in one straight line facing the School buildings. Today was allotted for putting up the shelters and smaller booths as well as putting up decorations and streamers all around. Crepe paper littered the freshly mowed grass along with a lot of tools, like hammers and saws and dozens upon dozens of nails. Now that it was an hour before lunchtime, majority of the party was already cleaning up, hauling boxes of leftover supplies here and there.

Lacus found herself smiling as she watched everyone work. She was having so much fun! This was actually the first time she had ever participated in anything like this, and she was really having a blast.

The princess of Orb, however, did not share her sentiments. She had heard her grumbling about having to climb up the ladder in such a scandalously short skirt. (They needed someone to hammer down the tent's base pole, and no one was strong enough to do so except for Cagalli). But nonetheless, she was a sport and cooperated anyway.

The songstress shielded her eyes from the smoldering rays of the sun as she searched for Kira and Athrun in the expanse of grass. They said they would be waiting for them in the eastern part of the field for an early lunch. She did not have to look that hard. She saw them immediately, talking to each other and lounging about under the shade of a Cherry blossom tree, three baby carriers sitting peacefully behind them. Kira, whose hair really had grown and was now covering his lavender eyes in brown locks, was listening to something Athrun was saying.

"Look at those slackers," Cagalli muttered after taking a swig of her water. "Why is it that we didn't ask them to sign up for the committee anyway?"

Lacus tried to stifle a giggle. She was not successful and so Cagalli stared at her dryly. Lacus ignored her stare. The truth was, majority of the committee members were female. The guys had shied away from the list. "Oh, come on Cagalli. Don't tell me you're not enjoying yourself."

Cagalli's expression did not change. "All right. I won't."

Lacus could only shake her head ruefully, and she continued to observe Kira from a distance. The mere act of looking at him while he was unaware made her happy. Sighing contentedly, she let herself remember that time in the beach. They had not talked about anything while they hunted for shells and stones. Instead, they worked in a comfortable silence, her hand in his as they waded through the deeper part of the water, searching the sand with their feet. Words, she then realized, were really the main source for misunderstandings. Sometimes, there really was no need of them.

_At least not for us..._

In reality, she found it quite romantic, the way Kira had settled everything between them, not really saying it straight out, having to grope for the next thing to do. She found everything about it sweet. Down to the last detail. It was really kind of weird. Those were the first I-Love-You's they have shared, yet that was not what made the moment special... It was the silence.

"Oh, great. Now you're ignoring me." Cagalli's whine brought her back from that time in the beach to that sizzling reality and she immediately turned to her.

"I'm sorry. You were saying something?"

Cagalli smirked, gesturing with her head to the end of the line of tents. She was really grumpy today. "I said that I'm going to help those two there by the last tent. I'm afraid if I don't, someone will end up falling and breaking her neck."

Lacus followed her eyes to where a very petite girl with dark hair was on top of the aluminum ladder Cagalli had used to reach the top of the tents. She was holding a hammer that she could hardly raise over her head. Two other girls were holding the foot of the ladder, which was swaying quite dangerously. "Oh, my," the songstress gasped as the petite girl suddenly dropped the hammer to the ground, missing one of the girls holding the ladder by inches. All three of them screamed.

Cagalli shook her head in frustration and shoved her water bottle to Lacus. "Honestly. I should get paid by the hour for this." And she stalked away, at the same time tugging at her skirt futilely.

Lacus bit back another giggle. She knew that Cagalli was somehow enjoying herself. She had to be. Opening her own water bottle, she was about to take a sip from it when she felt someone watching her from behind. It was not a bad feeling at all. Just a very uncomfortable one. So slowly, she turned around and ended up staring at a pair of very startling green eyes examining her a few feet away.

She was smiling at her, the owner of those eyes. The next thing Lacus noticed was her hair. She did not believe anyone could possibly grow her hair that long and still maintain it. She had beautiful strawberry blond hair that flowed down to her knees. The next thing Lacus noticed was that she had the most translucent skin, almost to the point of glowing. But what bothered the songstress more was the fact that her over-all appearance did not look at all natural, if that made any sense at all.

Uncertainly, Lacus waved at her and smiled weakly. The gesture seemed to have encouraged the strange girl to approach.

"Hello, Ms. Clyne. My name is Karina Takano. You can call me Kari," she said, nodding a bit, causing the sun to make the three silver studs in either ear lobe flash slightly. Her voice was as serene as her face. She seemed to be the kind of person who wouldn't care if the world suddenly stopped revolving.

Lacus tilted her head to the side and asked, "You already know my name, although I don't know how. But please call me Lacus. Ms. Clyne makes me seem older."

Kari smiled. Lacus found it quite strange. She was so meek. She did not believe even Miriallia was that meek. "Very well, Lacus. Is she your friend?" She asked as she gestured to Cagalli, who was now on top of the ladder and was now being swooned over by the three girls holding the foot of it up. "She should be careful. Freshmen here in A. U. tend to idolize anyone who is able to do neat stuff. Looks like she already has her first share of fans."

Lacus laughed. "Climbing up a ladder and hammering down a pole is neat stuff? Well, I suppose, since not everyone can do it. Cagalli is really very strong."

"Cagalli? Her name is Cagalli? You don't mean Cagalli Yula Attha, do you?"

Lacus paused, thinking if she had made a mistake of mentioning Cagalli's name. She really had not been that conscious before about their identities, as she had always thought that none of the people here should know about them. But it seems like she was wrong. This girl didn't seem to care.

Kari blinked at her and spoke. "Although the government strives to isolate the youth here in Hokkaido by keeping international news about the war off the media and others, bits and pieces about it cannot be prevented from slipping inside. Youth who have been brought here to escape from the war have relatives who keep in touch. And then, you know the rest. We have relatives in Orb, and so Cagalli Yula Attha is a name quite popular to anyone who cares enough to know."

This time, Lacus was taken aback. She had never really asked a question, had she? How on earth did this girl know she wanted to ask that question? But she supposed Kari was right. If it weren't for Murrue and Kisaka who keep them posted about the peace talks, they would have been left clueless on the progress of everything they had worked for... "Well, I guess that makes sense." She tilted her head to the right. "But then, how did you know mine?"

"You're wondering, because you're a Coordinator?"

The songstress slowly replied. Was she? "Well, yes... "

She laughed quietly. "Who _wouldn't _know your name? Being one of the first to make this cease fire happen."

This time, Lacus did not know how to respond to that, so she just scratched her head. "You know about that too, huh?"

"Yes, well, I don't want to make too long introductions, Lacus, so I'll tell you the reason why I approached you. I need to ask a favor from you, if it wouldn't be too much of a bother."

Glad for the change in conversation, she nodded happily. "I will be glad to help you out if I can. What can I do for you?"

She was telling the truth when she said she did not like too long introductions. She told her motives straight out. "I am working on a thesis entitled _Positive and Negative Effects of Genetic Alteration to Children_. I need you to be one of my subjects along with your other friends."

Lacus felt herself sucking in air sharply. That really threw her off the loop... Well, maybe she should have seen that coming. After all, she seemed quite knowledgeable about the war, and so it should not been that much of a surprise to her. But still, her existence being put to the question was another story... _What does she want with us? Alteration?_

The next thing that happened left Lacus wondering if she should be grateful to leave the invitation hanging or not. Cagalli suddenly materialized beside her, the hammer still in hand. Her expression was unreadable. "Trouble brewing," she snapped.

"Huh?"

And then she saw it. Right there, under the trees in the eastern part of the soccer field, were Kira and Athrun, both on their feet, and a few feet from where they stood were three guys advancing slowly, swaggering like they owned the place.

Lacus felt the blood drain from her face, her hand automatically flying to her mouth. "What are they up to? Who are those people?"

Cagalli smirked. She really was not in a good mood. It was the heat. It had to be. "To tell you honestly, if it were just up to those three goons, I wouldn't worry. But cowards always do tend to play it safe. Look there." She pointed to the trees lining the soccer field and Lacus gasped loudly.

About half a dozen boys, obviously with the three who were brave enough for a frontal approach, were waiting at a distance, as if waiting for a cue to make their grand entrance. This was not good... Where had those bullies come from anyway? What do they want? Lacus knew that whatever it was, it definitely was not good...

Kari shook her head gently. "He's at it again."

Lacus stared at her in confusion for a full minute and only diverted her attention when Cagalli suddenly handed her the heavy hammer and started for the eastern part of the field with a vengeance. The other girls working on the tent had stopped whatever they were doing and were now watching in stunned silence at what was going to happen. Cagalli's instant fans were whimpering in the corner of the now stable tent. Lacus felt more sweat bead her brow and she hurriedly dashed them away.

"Cagalli? Come back," she called out. The princess did not seem to mind her, and continued on her way through the grass as if drawn to the brewing trouble. She seemed to like to jump in head first in fights... Or maybe she really was just bored.

A moment of utter helplessness passed Lacus' face, pulled towards two directions of whether to run after Cagalli or run to get some help from Yzak or Dearka or someone. But she knew Dearka had left campus and Yzak... well, Yzak was somewhere else... wherever that was.

After a while of total confusion, the former won. Handing the hammer to Kari, who did not seem the least bit surprised that she did this, she muttered a quick apology before running after the princess. "Cagalli! Wait up!"

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Yzak cautiously stared down at the little Donald Duck mug filled with some sweet iced fruit drink the kind Mrs. Takano had handed him the moment he asked for a bit of her time. He was sitting quite uncomfortably on the low couch in the empty lobby of the Guidance Office, where Mrs. Takano had asked him to wait for her. This was where they had waited for their registration forms to be issued weeks ago. Yzak frowned. Now that he did not have anyone with him and he didn't have anyone to talk to, he found himself observing what was inside the office.

The high counter, once clean and spotless the first time they were there, now sat cluttered with heaps and heaps of papers and folders. It did not interest the Duel pilot much, so he found his eyes wandering to the high windows lining the east wall, which overlooked the soccer field. He did not have to be out there to know that it was hot as hell. For the first time that day he felt grateful; the office was air-conditioned. He then let his eyes fall into the tall shelf shoved in the corner of the room. Then he grimaced. The first two top shelves were filled with miniature stuffed animals. Dogs, giraffes, cats and penguins of different colors. The remaining lower shelves were crowded with enormous stuffed bunny rabbits. Yzak felt shivers rattle his spine at the mere sight of those. Who the heck would make such creepy toys? The rabbits looked like they were going to eat a child alive, what with those too big front teeth and deranged-looking eyes...

He was yanked back to reality when Mrs. Takano finally arrived, in her hands was something that looked like a pink Minnie Mouse mug of her own. Yzak assumed it was also filled with iced fruit drink.

"Well, this is definitely a first," the guidance counselor said cheerily as she settled down on the couch next to him.

Yzak couldn't help but smile. This was the second time he was able to see the lady, but he kind of liked her already. She reminded him of his own mother. With brown hair, and eyes that he had seen on her daughter's, she was an elegant enough looking lady in her early thirties. "Good day to you. I'm sorry for taking up too much of your time."

With this, the counselor chuckled richly. "I'm actually glad to find an excuse to leave all that paperwork. Besides, this is the first time in a long while since I've had a visitor. So tell me. What do you need to talk about?"

Yzak stared at the lady inquisitively. She had little – or none at all – of Kari's silent serenity. "I wish to talk to you about your daughter, if you wouldn't mind."

This made Mrs. Takano sigh in frustration. "So she really went through with it, didn't she?"

Now that was confusing. "Huh?"

She took a sip of her cold drink and continued. "Kari's always kept track of the students who enter this university, always hoping that they would be... 'like her' or at least that was how she'd term it. Burin Dellit told me that I should at least keep your identity, along with Mr. Yamato's, Mr. Zala's, Ms. Clyne's and Mr. Elthman's, a secret because not everyone seem to share my daughter's eagerness and open-mindedness when it came to Coordinators. But Kari, I couldn't keep anything from her. She is too... loved."

Yzak blinked. "So, you told her about us?"

"Honestly, yes. But if I had known that she would be taking this into a different level – like making you a subject of her thesis - I wouldn't have given her your profile. Normally, she'd just talk to 'genetically altered' individuals and sort of make friends. I almost fell out of bed that night when she told me that she'll be pushing through with her thesis, and the 'new students' will be her subjects."

Yzak shivered involuntarily. So that was how it happened. Kari had always been interested with genetically messed-up individuals... But it was only at that moment when he felt like wanted to find out more about the mysterious girl. She was too fascinating to let this opportunity pass to get to know about the girl that somehow found a way to make him look like a complete fool in front of himself without even trying. "Kari, she said that she was _altered_." He traced a finger on the rim of the Donald Duck mug. "What does that mean, anyway, being _altered_? What's the difference between me and Kari?"

The lady paused for a while as if to think and then continued. "Hmm. Let me see. It's kind of hard to explain to you the _difference _about anything, especially now that we're trying to bridge differences. You see, those genetically altered are simply that. _Altered. _In Kari's case, her eye color and hair were changed. I asked that her eyes be made like mine, and her hair to be strawberry-blonde. Nothing more."

Yzak only had one question. "Why?"

This time, Mrs. Takano was embarrassed. "I'd rather not tell you, young man. It's really a long, long story." She changed the subject immediately. "Anyway, genetically enhanced people – Coordinators, like you – are _improved_. Developed into human beings with superior skill, stamina, strength, speed and the like. Your immune system was also enhanced and so you really do not suffer from illnesses, unlike us Naturals. God, I hate using those terms. Naturals. Coordinators. Ugh!" she grimaced evidently.

Yzak felt his interest piquing up. He didn't even realize he had raised his drink to his mouth and sipped a bit of the sweet liquid. He blinked in surprise when he discovered he liked it, and was about to take another sip, when he saw a sad expression come across Mrs. Takano's face. "What's wrong? I didn't upset you, did I?"

"Oh, no child!" she exclaimed, brushing the thought away as if it were a pesky bug.

Yzak was taken aback. _Child? I'm a ...child...? _He blinked as he suddenly felt something annoyingly strange clutching his heart. He had never been called a child before. And he didn't even know if he liked it or not.

Mrs. Takano stared at Yzak strangely. "You know, you remind me of Kari."

Now that was a joke. Yzak burst out laughing. "Hah! Me and your daughter? Hardly. We're yin and yang. We have nothing in common."

The guidance counselor smiled. "Exactly. That's why I remember her when I look at you. You know why?"

"I don't think I want to know..."

"It's because you're everything she is not, or at least what she tries not to be."

Yzak winced. "Ouch. That hurts, Mrs. Takano."

"Oh, child!"

_Child?_

"I did not mean it in a bad way. In fact, I meant it in a very good way." Suddenly, her cheery attitude left her in a heartbeat. "My Kari... she and her brother had always been a problem to me. I suppose growing children do tend to be like that once in a while. But to tell you honestly, I have a better understanding of Kian, Kari's brother. I guess it's hard to miss the fact that Kian is still upset about the war. You see, my husband died in Orb, because of the war. He was not a soldier, but a civilian. I won't go into heavy detail, as I know you really don't want to hear about something that might remind you about it. We were safe here, of course. And the moment the news came, Kian was shattered. First, he cried day and night for months since that incident. He never talked to anyone, except when he wanted to look for a fight. He bullied everyone who he knew was altered, not knowing – or maybe not caring – that they have nothing to do with his father's death. I tried to understand him, and partly, I do. But my problem was Kari."

"What is wrong with her?"

"She accepted the news like as if she just found out her dog died. She never shed a single tear for her father's death, saying that there was no use in crying anyway. But mind you, she loved him so much. She had always been like that, so I should have seen it coming from her. She was always there, accepting whatever the world threw at her, with a serenity even I, a guidance counselor, could understand. She never cries, and she seldom laughs out loud, too."

The Duel pilot listened to the hurting mother's words with genuine interest. In all honesty, he normally would not have cared. Kari was, after all, nobody to him. A person who would really not let him gain any good from anything, and yet he found listening about her a knowledge he wanted to keep for future use. He didn't even know why. He asked a question. "Do you think it's because of her alteration? Which is really silly. _Can _that certain technology actually affect one's personality?"

The lady thought for a moment, then shook her head. "I really do not know. But I guess that's how she is. Perhaps, that really _is_ how she is. Maybe she's happy that way. You are the complete opposite of Kari. You seem to be the hotheaded type. Now don't look at me like that. She is very meek, very quiet. Sometimes, I keep on asking myself if she'll ever try to stand up and take control of her life, instead of just going with the flow."

Frowning, the Duel pilot began to think. She had never really struck her as that passive with life. Heck, she probably isn't even aware that she can persuade anyone into anything! Look at how she dealt with him about that thesis!

Yzak honestly wanted to listen more, but something caught his attention from the corner of his eye that made him catapult to his feet, almost spilling his drink. There, out of the window overlooking the soccer field, Kira and Athrun were standing under a tree, with those three goons who had cornered him in the library. And as if it weren't bad enough, they had brought backup... He could see a handful of boys slinking behind other trees in the area.

"What's wrong?" Mrs. Takano asked worriedly, staring at him with those familiar green eyes.

Yzak stared back, suddenly feeling his heart ache for this lady.

_Oh, nothing ma'am. Your son is out there to kick Coordinator butt. Isn't it neat? Would you want to watch your son unleash his bitterness to the world in school premises?_

The Duel pilot shook his head hurriedly as he handed the Donald duck mug to her, which she took gingerly. "Nothing, ma'am. I just suddenly remembered I have to meet someone for lunch. I appreciate your time."

And not wasting breath, he was out of that air-conditioned office and into the inferno of Abashiri Summer with only one question in his mind that was left unanswered.

_If Kian hated those kind of people, did he know Kari was one of them?_

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

It was a one-way street, that converation. It was the longest time he had heard her talk that way, seldom pausing to breathe. She just talked and talked and talked and talked about her life, about her and Tolle's life. On and on and on...

And he loved every minute of it.

Dearka was sitting cross-legged on the carpeted floor, Miriallia's feet resting on one of his knees, her back propped on the side of the couch as she related almost everything about her. And he listened, sometimes losing himself to the sound of her voice, having to shake himself back to catch up to what she was saying, afraid that she might ask questions and he wouldn't be able to answer. He loved watching her, her hands animatedly gesturing, and sometimes scrunching up her forehead when her head would start to ache again. It was that perfect opportunity to stare at her without being rude. Her orange-brown hair that used to be resting neatly down the nape of her neck had grown out of its style and now fell past her shoulders in tangles, in desperate need of brushing. There were dark circles under her eyes and her clear complexion was flushed because of the fever. She obviously lacked sleep. She was wearing a wrinkled shirt too big for her with bits of lint sticking all over it, and loose sweatpants.

In short, she was beautiful.

He found himself smiling as she continued with her story, sometimes pausing to try to remember some important names or events. Occasionally, he would nod at her, to show that he was listening, and sometimes he would ask a question or two, to clarify something. For no less than two hours did they talk about that certain subject, from the moment she and Tolle had first met, to the time when she had met the Buster pilot. He did not bother to ask her the reason why she was telling him these things, for in reality, he didn't care. So long as he got the opportunity to be around her, it was enough.

Even if it did sort of sting, having to hear about her true love...

It was an inexplainable feeling, jealousy. He hated it. It was the most horrible feeling anyone could ever feel in his life, and this he truly believed. It was different from anger or hate, because he knew that when you were jealous, you were most definitely helpless, because it is an emotion you couldn't blame onto anyone but yourself.

"What's wrong?" Miriallia asked, her eyes scanning his face intently.

It was then did he discover he was scowling at the thought of being helplessly jealous of this person, Tolle, for having gained the love of this precious little goddess in an over-sized shirt and sweat pants. He quickly wiped the scowl away and replaced it with a smile.

"Oh, it's nothing. Please, go on," he said as he rested his elbow on one of his knees and propped his chin in his palm. "I was distracted, sorry."

And Miriallia continued with her story. And as she did, Dearka found himself comparing himself to the ex-boyfriend.

_Tolle is sensitive... Well, I'm a bit sensitive too, right? And Tolle is thoughtful... I'm thoughtful, too. In a way... Well, sure Miriallia and I haven't know each other for that long, as opposed to their history, but that doesn't matter, right? Right?_

He was yanked back from his insecure thoughts when he realized Miriallia's eyes were drooping sleepily. He even noticed she was stifling a yawn, and her head was bobbing up and down, as if fighting to keep it up. Worriedly, and without warning, he reached out with both hands, holding her head on each side. At first, she was startled and she stopped talking, but since she was too weak to fight back, the only thing she asked was, "What are you doing?"

Dearka brushed her question aside and let one of his hand travel from her cheek to her slender neck. _Holy! She's burning up! _His eyes widened as he placed his other hand on her forehead. "I'm sorry to interrupt, Ms. Haww, but I suggest you go to bed now. You're warm. Shouldn't you be resting?"

He watched as she blinked her eyes sleepily and placed her own hand over his hand on her neck. "Am I really burning up? I guess I really am, huh?" she murmured weakly.

Dearka nodded, smiling a bit. She looked like she was about to topple over. "Maybe I should tuck you in and let you rest now. You really should try to rest up so tomorrow you'd be able to go to school." Standing up effortlessly on his shoeless feet, he reached a hand down to her. "Come on. Up you go."

Miriallia took his hand and tried to stand, but she ended up falling on her behind, her free hand flying to her head. "... hurts..."

Sighing, and quite happily at that, the Buster pilot bent down and carried her in his arms gently. Maybe it had been a bad idea after all, coming over to visit. She should have been resting, but instead she was forced to entertain him. "Let's get you to bed, Miriallia."

He knew which room to go to. It was the left door in the hall of the girls' room, since he remembered having seen Cagalli stalk to the right one when they had walked in on her with that ketchup bottle in her hand a few weeks ago, and he also remembered having been in Lacus' room in the middle a couple of days ago with that roach incident. The only room left had to be hers.

Miriallia was resting her head on his chest as he tried to open the door, which turned out to be quite a difficult feat, what with a girl cradled in his arms. But he managed to turn the knob and kick the door open, causing it to hit the wall. Miriallia cringed. "Sorry," he apologized as he lumbered into the room.

He liked what he saw in it. It wasn't that girly. The bed was neatly made up, with a blue comforter thrown over it and a lot of yellow and orange pillows arranged on the head of the bed. On the desk shoved near the window, next to a little clutter of papers and notebooks and a desk lamp, were small piggy figurines he assumed she had collected over the past weeks they had been there. On small orange pegs nailed to the wall hung a few clothing along with her uniform. He scowled at the latter. He did not want her to wear those. They were too short. Many guys would die to have an opportunity to look up a girl's skirt. (Not that he wouldn't, but certainly not up Miriallia's skirt!) Shaking his head at the perverted thoughts snaking through his subconscious mind, he quickly threw the comforter aside and lowered the sick girl to the bed, and covered her with it.

She looked up at him questioningly. "It's warm..."

Dearka blinked, standing perfectly still. He was quite conscious with being in a room alone with her. Was he supposed to cover her with the blanket? He's always seen it on television, having to cover the patient with a blanket... But it _is _pretty warm today. Maybe he had to keep her cool? "Uh, do you want me to open the window?"

Miriallia's eyelids fluttered to a close and she murmured, "It's warm..."

That left the Buster pilot in anagrams. Now what? Hesitating for a bit, he stiffly made his way to the desk, pushed back the curtains, then opened the window. A welcoming breeze immediately blew in, tickling Dearka's ears. That breeze felt good...

"Dearka?" He heard his patient call to him quietly, causing him to hurry to her side. Man, he had to get out of there! It was too uncomfortable. "Yeah?"

"Now it's cold..."

_What? _He scratched his head and turned to the window again. _Should I close it? But if I do, then it would be too warm. _He turned to Miriallia, whose eyes were peacefully closed, her forehead scrunched up a bit. "Uh, shall I close it?"

"It's cold..."

Dearka blinked. Now what? He looked around the little room for anything to give him inspiration on what he had to do next. Finding nothing, he wilted. "Uh, let's see. Do you want another blanket?"

Miriallia didn't say anything.

He sighed. Maybe she's feeling better now. After a moment of staring at her, he quietly pulled the ladder-back chair from the desk and sat on it a few feet away from the bed, pretty much enjoying the breeze blowing through his hair as he watched the girl sleep. He crossed his arms over his chest and sighed. After a minute, he uncrossed his arms and let them rest on his knees, and then sighed again. Another minute, he crossed his legs, then sighed _again_. He uncrossed them after a while. _Again._ Man! Now what?

"Dearka?"

The Buster pilot jumped. She was still awake? "Uh, yeah?"

"I'm still cold..."

Helplessly, he knuckled his chin, searching for a better solution to this. He had to know what to do with this! He had to! He was a soldier, for crying out loud! He had to know what to do...

And maybe he did.

Standing up from the chair stiffly, he made his way to the bed and after a while, he lowered himself to sit on the edge of it uneasily. He swallowed. He knew exactly what to do, right? He felt his heart try to burst out of his chest as he cautiously lied down next to her on top of the comforter, lowering his head to the pillow facing her sleeping form. This time, his heart was going a mile a minute - no, make that a second - as he slowly wrapped an arm around her shoulder, half expecting her to shove him when she discovered he was lying next to her on her bed. That would be rich, wouldn't it?

He felt his face heat up when he felt Miriallia snuggle to his chest comfortably. He tensed. They were silent for a while, until Miriallia spoke.

"Dearka?"

_Get the hell out of my bed!_

Dearka gulped. "Yeah?"

"I feel much better now. Thank you..."

Silence.

Dearka sighed, smiling to himself. "You're welcome."

Nothing could have ruined that moment for him. Suddenly, he began to think of that time when Miriallia had washed his hair in the women's showers, having her on top of him, stunned, when she had slipped on the suds.

He cringed. _And then Cagalli came..._

He cringed even more. _Wouldn't it be funny if Cagalli suddenly burst through that door and saw us in this position?_

He paused to think, then shivered involuntarily, tightening his embrace around Miriallia's body. _That would be hilarious..._

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

_­­­_Athrun narrowed his eyes into slits as the three had finally reached the end of their small pilgrimage, managing to swagger even when coming to a halt a considerable distance away from them. He did not know what these people want, but he was willing to bet that whatever it was, it sure as hell wasn't to make friends. The Justice pilot would normally just brush away these kinds of situations, but being quite in a bad mood, for he was already hungry and he was awfully stressed out about the opening act for the Summer Festival, not to mention the heat and the sun, he really did not feel up for diplomacies. He knew that his friend, Kira, who was standing ready on the balls of his feet, felt pretty much the same way.

The red-head, who seemed to be the one in charge, smirked at them annoyingly, crossing his arms in front of his chest, probably to appear cool. It did not work for Athrun.

"Is there anything we can do for you?" Kira asked in a calm voice. The only thing that betrayed his words were his hands that kept on clenching and unclenching on his sides.   
"_Is there anything we can do for you?_" Nose-ring guy imitated him in an annoyingly high-pitched voice. All three of them laughed out loud, and Athrun's enhanced hearing told him that the backup somewhere to their left, also joined in on the joke. Which could hardly be considered a joke anyway. 

Athrun straightened and slipped his hands into the pockets of his slacks. (Those annoying slacks...) He stared at the redhead with a deadpanned expression. "My friend here asked you nicely. But since you're really rude, I will be. What do you want?" Man, he wanted to eat already... he _needed _to eat...!

The Close-up smile guy sneered and turned to the redhead. "Hey, Kian. He's being rude to you."

Athrun felt his teeth grind at the name. He was going to remember that name. _Kian... Kian... _

Kian cocked his head to the right rather annoyingly. "Yeah, he is." He spat on the grass, which Athrun thought to be disgusting. "You're two of them. You came here when the cease-fire happened, didn't you? Don't try to deny it."

Athrun was flabbergasted. He hadn't even opened his mouth yet, for goodness' sake! He was beginning to hate this day. It was that kind of day when nothing seemed to go right. "What of it?"

"_What of it?_" Nose-ring guy mimicked again. Close-up smile guy snickered. It made Athrun's blood boil. He heard Kira growl under his breath.

Kian stared daggers at nose-ring guy. "Will you stop it, Ishi?" then at close-up smile guy. "You're no better, Yalin. Shut up, both of you."

Athrun unconsciously added those names to his hate list. _Ishi... Yalin... _"If you would be so kind, please just leave us alone. We really have better things to do than mess with you."

Kian snappily returned his green eyes back at them. If looks could kill, Athrun and Kira would have been dead. "Oh, that's right. I almost forgot. Coordinators are _too good _and have _better things to do _than mess with _Naturals_. Oh, I'm _sorry_, Mr. Coordinator. Please don't kill me!" He said sarcastically, cowering mockingly behind that guy, Ishi.

_What the...? They know...?_

Kira sighed. The Justice pilot could _feel _his friend loosening, relaxing. He should have seen that coming. Kira was not like Athrun - who thinks pretty much about everything before acting but majority of the time ends up making rash and drastic decisions. (Like, oh, say blowing up the Justice and not even thinking that 'Oh, right! I could blow up the Justice _and _still live!') Kira was a levelheaded individual, whose experiences about war and fighting had traumatized him almost to the point of depression. For him, this petty bull session was no different from fighting mobile suits. For him, it was **_still _**a fight, and so it had to be avoided.

"We didn't mean it that way," Kira said, spreading his arms out to explain.

"Like I would believe you, _murderer_!" Kian yelled.

And at that, Athrun knew Kira was shattered. He had always been really touchy about those kinds of issues. He saw his friend lower his eyes to the ground, probably thinking of the times when he was forced to kill in order to survive. This made Athrun mad. He stepped in front of Kira. "Now just hold on a minute. What on earth did we ever do to you anyway?"

He watched as Kian tried to open his mouth to say something, but even before he could utter more of his hateful words, Athrun and Kira were taken aback as the redhead bully ended up sprawling face first on the ground with a strangled gasp. His two cronies yelled as they jumped back in surprise.

And that was when Athrun saw her.

It was Cagalli, her hands calmly folded to her stomach, her left leg raised in front of her, evidence enough that she had kicked Kian from behind, causing him to fall flat on his face. She had a satisfied look on her sweaty face framed by a mop of messy blond locks matted on her forehead. She had an ugly sneer on her lips.

Athrun felt all the blood drain out of him. "Ca – Cagalli..." No. No, this cannot be happening. Cagalli couldn't possibly have done this. It was too reckless...

Reality check. **_She did_**. And she looked so **_damn _**happy about it, too!

The Kian character hurriedly scrambled to his feet, spitting out dead grass and dirt from his mouth. He immediately whirled around with a roar to see who had even dared to do such a thing to him.

Cagalli was not amused. She held his stare like as if she were looking at a brick wall. "You talk too much. So I kicked you," she said plainly, not the least bit taken when Ishi and Yalin advanced towards her. Athrun pushed past them and pulled Cagalli by the arm roughly.

She smiled at him sweetly. "Hi, Athrun," she said, giving him a peck on the cheek. "I saw you here, and so I thought I'd say hi. So, hi."

Athrun shook her violently. "Why are you here? You should have just stayed away. This doesn't concern you. You should have taken it from Lacus and stayed behind, Cagalli. You ..." the words died from his lips when Lacus suddenly popped out of nowhere behind Cagalli.

_**GREAT!!!! Oh, happy day!**_

"Cagalli! I told you to wait for me!" The songstress said, upset. She looked at Kira and waved. "Hello!"

Kira looked like he was going to throw up. "Not you, too..." He was next to her in a heartbeat.

"Lacus..." he said, holding her on the shoulders, the bullies, still very much in disbelief, completely forgotten. "What are you doing here?"

She smiled. "We saw you from where we were and we were worried. Cagalli stormed off, and... Why are you looking at me like that, sir?" she asked Kian, who obviously was not happy to be ignored.

Athrun shoved Cagalli behind him as he saw Kian signal with a wave of his hand and about half a dozen guys emerged from out of the trees nearby, each either armed with a baseball bat, or brass knuckles or a knife.

_This is not good..._

Kira eyed his surroundings, trying to weigh the pros and cons of everything. He was looking at Lacus worriedly. Athrun was also well aware that Cagalli would be able to hold her own for a while, if push came to shove, but Lacus was here... and she was not actually known to be good with melee combat, or in layman's terms, a _brawl_.

Athrun loosened the first two buttons from his coat, making sure that he'd be able to move easily, and he felt Cagalli tensing from behind him. He eyed the number of girls in the distance, gathered by the tents. All were waiting for something to happen.

But it took only one spark to ignite everything, what with the tension so thick in the air. Kian threw the first wild punch at Kira, roaring wordlessly. Kira easily dodged it, dragging a whimpering Lacus with him.

And everyone went wild!

Athrun was not able to watch anymore, for Ishi attacked him in a flash. For someone as big and wide as he was, he sure was fast, tackling him to the ground with amazing skills of a wrestler. He lost Cagalli as he raised his arm over his head and let his elbow drop down on the guy's shoulder blade. Ishi howled in pain as he loosened his grip on Athrun's torso, freeing himself from the tackle. Athrun didn't bother with making sure he'd stay down. He immediately searched for his Cagalli. He saw Kira lay a nasty punch on Yalin's beautiful mouth, causing the guy to drop on the ground in a miserable heap, limbs poking out everywhere. (That'd take care of his teeth. Nothing should be so damn perfect anyway...) Kira grabbed Lacus by the arm and pulled her aside when the bat-wielding guy swung his weapon over the songstress' head, missing her by centimeters. This angered Kira. Letting out an incoherent battle cry, he rammed the guy with his shoulder, causing him to catapult a few hundred feet away from the fight. He did not get up from where he landed. Kira grabbed the fallen bat from the ground and thrust in into Lacus' hands. The songstress took it uncertainly, but when a guy with what looked like a switch blade in his hands lunged at Kira from behind, she raised the bat over her head with a determined look in her pale face and unceremoniously cracked it over the bully's head, snapping the bat in two. The guy dropped to the ground.

Athrun was astounded! Lacus, although had not been trained as a soldier, was still a Coordinator, and so her strength was something that surprised even her. Obviously, she had never held, more so used, a weapon in her life. She looked mighty satisfied with her job, though. Athrun pried his eyes away from them and called out Cagalli's name. He found her in the process of kicking a guy with the brass knuckles in the groin. Athrun felt violent shivers run up and down his spine at the memory of how that felt. He almost felt sorry for the guy when his eyes crossed painfully and he dropped to his knees as his hands flew to his hurting privates. Cagalli kneed him on the chin and he toppled over backwards. The princess of Orb did a little happy-dance at her victory.

Athrun let out a whistle. "Looking good, Attha!" Cagalli winked at him from where she was. Athrun laughed proudly. Bad idea, letting his guard down. He did not notice quickly enough that the two out of three (aside, of course, from Kian) who were left standing had snuck up from behind him while he was busy cheering Cagalli on. Each had grabbed him on either arm, and he saw Kian charging from a distance, in his hand a switchblade of his own. Athrun tensed, trying to shake off the guys pinning his arms. He was about to call to Kira, who was still busy with the other left standing.

Cagalli tried to get to him, but she didn't have to.

Out of nowhere, Yzak suddenly materialized by his side and grabbed the guys holding him prisoner. Startled at the sudden arrival of reinforcement, they jumped as one of them tried to throw a punch at the light-haired boy. Athrun slammed his fist on the other guy's jaw, rendering him unconscious with one blow.

Cagalli hurried to his side. "Are you okay?" she demanded, her hands flying to his face shakily.

"I'm all right, Cagalli. Don't worry. Come on. Let's get the babies..." He smiled down at her and forced her hands away from his face. He looked up and found Yzak finishing up the job with Kian.

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

Absorbing the blow meant for his face with his left arm, he swiftly moved slightly to the right, then forward as Kian lashed out madly with his knife. He lost his balance at his attempt at stabbing, and Yzak grabbed him painfully by the left arm and spun him around, grabbing him in a choke-hold.

"You just never give up, do you," Yzak asked in a menacing whisper as he tightened his hold on the bastard. He honestly could not believe this war-freak was related to _her_. It had to be a joke. It just had to be.

Kian laughed. "That's it. Finish me off, Coordinator. You and your kind are all the same."

Yzak scowled. "You must be forgetting that you were the first one who picked on us. We weren't doing nothing to you. Secondly, you were fighting unfairly. Nine to two? What kind of friggin' fight is that? And girls? You're fighting _girls_, you queer!"

The bastard was not moved. Instead, he screamed and with much fervor, he brought his elbow to Yzak's gut with incredible force that the Duel pilot ended up on his knees in pain, his mind spinning. _He's strong...?_

There he was, on the grass, the bully's feet fast approaching. "You goddamn piece of - " Kian swore as she let loose a powerful kick meant to hit Yzak on the face, but Yzak recovered quickly. With a burst of speed, he anticipated the move and grabbed the guy's leg in with both hands. The bully flailed his arms wildly, Yzak let out a small grunt when the blade caught the right portion of his forehead, missing his eyes by a mere inch. His vision reddened as a film of blood dripped to his right eye. Now that made him mad! With a surge of energy, he whipped the piece of scum to the nearby tree, the bark of which splintering in the impact of his skull. Then he lay in a heap by the roots. Unmoving, but still breathing.

Unfortunately.

Not that Yzak intended to kill him, but there was no harm in wishing...

Kira looked like he was hit with lightning, what with his hair sticking up in every direction. Lacus was holding half a bat. Cagalli was angrily kicking the already unconscious guy who Yzak recognized as the guy with pretty teeth, although he doubted there will be anything left of his pearly whites. His mouth was bleeding and his jaw looked like it was broken in three places. Athrun was trying to stop Cagalli from stomping the guy into dust.

"You totaled my brother, " said a voice from behind him.

Yzak groaned. _Oh, no. Not you again_. He slowly turned around and there she was. Kari, with her stoic expression, a hammer in her hand. (A hammer?) She was looking around at the scene. Unconscious bodies littered everywhere, but it looked like she was gazing at tomatoes and carrots in the vegetable aisle of the supermarket. He shifted nervously on his feet. She was staring at him.

"Do you know you're bleeding?" she asked flatly, slowly placing the hammer down on the ground.

Yzak touched his forehead. He almost forgot about it. "It's nothing. It'll stop." Then he stared at the ground. "They stared it," he said defensively.

She stared at him more, but didn't say anything.

The others approached them a moment later, dolls in hand, which Yzak was grateful for.

"Kari, I didn't know you knew Yzak," Lacus said, pushing away a lot of hair that had come loose from her ponytail, the broken bat under her left arm. Kira, Athrun and Cagalli watched, wiping a considerable amount of sweat from their foreheads.

Kari smiled at her. "We met earlier. If you'll excuse me, I will have to tend to Mr. Jule's wound. Is there anyone else who needs first aid?"

Four heads swung left and right.

"Except for them," Cagalli said, pointing her thumb at the fallen bodies.

Kari shook her head. "They brought that upon themselves. Let them deal with it."

Panic gripped Yzak by the throat. _She's taking me somewhere...!_

And yes, ten minutes later, he found himself sitting in the infirmary bed, Kari dabbing at his wound with a surprisingly gentle hand. Her eyes were unreadable. She seemed too engrossed in fixing his wound up.

Yzak bit his lip uneasily, then turned his eyes to her. "Kari - "

"I forgive you," she said shortly, ripping open a bag of Medi-Plast bandages and gingerly plastering one on his wound.

Yzak shut his mouth. She forgives him. That seemed like the end of the conversation about beating the heck out of her brother. So he didn't bother to pursue it. He couldn't believe that he'd gotten out of that fix in a second. And here he thought he was in trouble.

She nodded satisfactorily at her work. "You're lucky that knife was sharp. It'll barely leave a mark. The last thing we want is to add more to your collection," she murmured, tracing an unusually cool finger across the scar on the bridge of his nose.

Yzak's eyes widened in embarrassment, his face heating up. Abruptly, he pulled away. "Don't touch me." _What a loser, you are, Yzak Jule. What a way to say thank you for her help..._

As usual, she took no offense from it.

Yzak tried to change the subject. "We're not going to get in trouble, are we?"

She shook her head slowly. "Many witnesses are willing to testify against them. And to tell you honestly, the administration here is used to it. This isn't the first time this happened. Kian and his gang, they're always at it. They're the ones who will get in trouble. Don't worry." She smiled at him as she started to keep the things she used to treat him. "I was really surprised, you know. I didn't see that coming, Mr. Yamato and Mr. Zala in a brawl. They never really struck me as fond of fistfights."

Yzak frowned. Come to think of it, neither did he. He shook his head. Those two will do anything for those girls. "Cagalli and Lacus are there, that's why. Those two would have tried to talk their way out of it, but since the girls were there, then I guess there wasn't much of a choice."

She said nothing, but was looking at him weirdly.

"What?" he said defensively.

"You sound bitter."

"No I don't!"

"You're lying."

That silenced Yzak. He grumbled. "Well, it's just that it makes me wonder why they're always together anyway. I mean look at Cagalli and Athrun. They have nothing in common. Cagalli is a spoiled brat who always wants to have her way so she strong-arms Athrun into her plans. Athrun, on the other hand, is quiet and serious, or at least majority of the time."

She smiled at him more.

Cringing, he continued, "And Kira and Lacus, sure they're cute together. But Lacus has a weird personality and Kira? Kira's... Kira. How could that thing happen anyway?"

She was silently examining his face. '_Reading' _him, perhaps. Yzak was starting to get uncomfortable, until she spoke. "Give me your hand," she said, and not waiting for his permission, she grabbed his hand and raised it in front of his face. "It is because of the _Clasping of Hands_."

The Duel pilot had to use every drop of his self-control not to pull his hand away. The last thing he wanted was to offend her more. She continued, "Our fingers represent our good side, our strong traits, while the spaces between them are our shortcomings." Yzak swallowed as she traced his hand with her cool fingers.

He felt his face heat up as she bumped the tips of her own fingers to his. He winced as it hurt a bit. "If we try to press our good sides to our partner, it will not work. It never will." And the next thing she did almost made Yzak run out of the infirmary. She slowly slipped her fingers through his, clasping her hand tightly to his. "But if we let the other fill in the gaps – our shortcomings – then we create harmony." She raised her green eyes to meet his blue ones. "Cagalli and Athrun may not be the same, but that's what makes them special. They balance each other out. In Kira and Lacus' case, they find strength from each other to fill in their weaknesses. That's how it goes. This may sound pretty crappy to you, but this is how I've always seen it."

The Duel pilot blinked as he felt more blood rush to his face, seeing his hands twined with hers. He was staring back at her, examining her face. He almost gasped when he swore he saw her eyes twinkle. It was gone in a split second. It was as if she had let her mask of absolute serenity falter for a while, and then put it up again the moment she realized she let it drop. She let go of his hand slowly and stood up from the bed.

"I guess I'll be seeing you around," she said as she made her way across the room. She was gone out the door in three silent strides, leaving Yzak staring at his hands, that for some unexplainable reason kept on tingling after her touch.

Angry with himself for having his feelings, once again, catch him off-guard, he hastily wiped his hand on the bed sheet. What was happening to him, anyway?

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

Cagalli pushed the door to their pad and she, Kira, Athrun and Lacus poured in, grateful for the breeze coming through the open window that had started blowing around four in the afternoon. Man, that day was hot! Cagalli couldn't wait for the Summer to end...

The boys had insisted on taking them home. After the events of today, she seriously believed they would have stood guard right outside their classrooms, had they not threatened them to leave at once.

Lacus sighed as she went directly to the sink, after depositing the dolls on the couch. "Hey. There's a watermelon here! What luck!" She giggled as she raised the heavy looking fruit for them to see.

Cagalli smiled. She had remembered having told Dearka that Milly was sick. The Buster pilot must have brought it earlier. Come to think of it, where was Dearka? She shrugged off her coat and let her backpack drop to the floor. Athrun immediately gathered it and neatly placed it on the center table. What a neat freak.

Kira was not talking. He simply just followed them around. He didn't look upset, but he looked preoccupied. Cagalli decided to let him be for the time being. He didn't look like he wanted to have another talking-to from his big sister. Cagalli watched as her brother simply curled on the low couch next to the dolls, eyes closing tiredly. Athrun settled on the carpeted floor and turned on the TV to the Abashiri University's school channel. (Kinda cool, their school having one.). There was a bunch of dancing clowns in the screen. Cagalli shivered. Athrun was entranced by it, actually leaning forward in interest.

Lacus was starting to prepare dinner. "Cagalli, can you check up on Milly? She's probably in her room, asleep. Can you see if she's feeling any better and ask her if she'd like something to eat. I'm making curry."

Cagalli nodded and crossed the living room. She saw Athrun lean to the left as she passed by, afraid that he might miss something about the dancing clowns. What was so interesting about those clowns anyway?

She didn't bother to knock, as she didn't want to wake her up if she was asleep. So slowly, stealthily, she opened the door. It was dark inside. "Milly?" she called out in a whisper. "You awake?"

She fumbled for the light switch, and in a moment, the room erupted with light.

And Cagalli screamed bloody murder.

Dearka and Milly bolted up in a sitting position as they screamed along with the princess of Orb. Bad idea. Their abrupt movement caused the mattress to slip and in a blink of an eye, the couple fell the floor in a heap, Dearka hurriedly making sure Miriallia fell on him so she wouldn't get hurt.

All the screaming brought Lacus, Kira and Athrun running.

Cagalli's face was beet red as she watched Dearka peer at Milly's face to see if she was all right.

"Oh. MY. **_GOD!!!_**" Cagalli exclaimed, her hands to her face. Then a very naughty expression crossed her face. "You naughty, naughty people!"

As if on cue, Miriallia and Dearka looked at each other, then at them and simultaneously burst into a fit of protests.

Kira's eyes were wide. "Dearka... ?"

Athrun was shaking his head ruefully. "So, Dearka, who's the guy with the testosterone problem again?"

Dearka stared at him evilly as he slowly got up to his feet, Miriallia, who had both hands on her temple, still cradled in his arms. "That is just so you, Zala, you perv. We weren't doing nothing."

Lacus blinked several times before covering her mouth with her hand. "We believe you, Dearka. But I wish you had picked a better time. Milly is sick..."

Dearka stared at her in disbelief. "I'll pretend you didn't say that Lacus. You know I like you and I respect you a lot." He settled Miriallia on her bed and she curled up in to a ball, out of embarrassment or out of pain, she did not know. But she burrowed deep into her many pillows anyway.

Cagalli cleared her throat in an attempt to settle everyone down. "Oh, anyway, I came here to ask **_Miriallia _**if she's feeling any better."

A muffled reply came from under the pillows. "I think things just got worse."

Cagalli feigned surprise. "I'm sorry. I must have disturbed you in your... _ahem!_... little rendezvous." She started to herd everyone out. "All right, people! Nothing to see here! Move along! Move along! Move – _**OW!**"_

She almost fell over when a pillow hit her on the back of her head. She whirled around and saw Milly standing on the bed, holding another pillow, ready to let it loose. Dearka was standing nearby, amused. "We weren't doing anything. Cagalli!" she yelled, a small smile playing on her lips. Seemed like she was well already.

Cagalli stuck out her tongue. "Yeah, right!" and ended up having a pillow smack her across the face.

"RUN!" Athrun screamed as Dearka grabbed two pillows from the bed. Kira, who seemed to have lost the melancholy from earlier, laughed as he and Athrun dashed away, Kira running to Lacus' room, and Athrun to Cagalli's, out to get artillery. Cagalli swallowed hard but ran off anyway, dragging a very shocked Lacus with her. They were pelted with orange pillows as they retreated.

"Run, Lacus! It's **_war_**!"

"**_War?_**" Lacus shouted as a pillow nearly hit her on the head. Dearka and Miriallia advanced out of the room with enough ammunition to hit at least each of them twice. Why on earth did Miriallia have so much pillows anyway?

Cagalli laughed out loud as Athrun emerged from her room, all of her pillows towed in his arms. Lacus was lost when she saw Kira hauling all of her fluffy stuffed toys out of her room.

The princess of Orb caught the pillows Athrun threw to her and she immediately aimed for Dearka. He dodged it easily, (Why on earth was he so good with dodging?) and it hit Kira squarely on the face instead.

"Hey! We're on the same side!" Kira shouted and threw a fuzzy yellow bunny at her.

Cagalli sighed. What a perfect way to end this stressful day. A pillow fight, some curry later, and after that, some watermelon.

She could not believe such a bad day turn out to be good anyway.

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

_**A/N: I made this chapter extra long, because I'm afraid I won't be able to update anytime this week, because of our final exams. (evil, evil final exams!) **_

_**Anyway, thanks again to the readers and reviewers of my story. **_

_**Please leave a review if you want me to write about anything you feel should be included in the next chapter. All your questions, by the way, will be answered in the following chapters. When I do not address them in my notes, it means I will be writing about them along the way. Okay? **_

__

_**Well, thanks again for everything!**_

**_(Concept of Clasping of Hands inspired by the graphic novel Finding Eden by Arnold Arre. It's a really good book!) _**


	18. Phase 18: Summer Showers

**_Author's Note: My brain cells are fried and I tried to revive them with by working on my other fics. Final exams completely totaled me but I survived. So here's the update. It may not be what you're expecting. So... uh... (grabs a garbage can lid for a shield just to make sure) read on... (hides)_**

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Seed...**_

_**July 13, AW**_

The past couple of days were a whirlwind of nothingness for Kira. Ever since that very fateful brawl in the soccer field last Monday, the Freedom pilot's days that followed after that just before the Summer Festival, composed mainly of taking care of Akira all by himself; Athrun had taken him seriously and begged Lacus to perform with him. And because of that, Athrun and Lacus had been staying late in school for the last two days, and Kira was grateful that after tonight, Lacus will finally be more available to her "family"...

Cagalli and Milly had immersed themselves into making the tents and booths perfect. Dearka, who really had not signed up for the committee, helped around anyway, carrying around Stephanie in an electric blue Snugli carrier on his back as he hauled boxes around for the girls. The Buster Pilot had not left Miriallia's side those two days, ever since she started wearing her uniform. The tan guy would snarl at any guy he'd catch ogling Miriallia's shapely legs. She really did have nice legs. It was kind of cute at first, but every time he saw them together, he would end up feeling utterly lonely...

Kira looked up into the very dark, dreary sky as he made his way down the marble steps of A. U., all alone, pretty much how he's been for the past couple of days. It looked like it was going to rain really hard, which was ironic, since it was awfully warm. He hoped not. The Festival was going to be ruined if it did, and his friends have worked so hard for it... Yes, aside from him and Yzak (wherever he was right now) were the only ones who did not participate in any activity that had anything to do with the Summer Festival.

He hated having to be alone with himself, with no one to talk to. He would end up thinking too much. Because of his fear of letting his thoughts wander to forbidden territory, he even tried to look for Kazui and Sai, who had been barely visible at all. Kira assumed they were still upset for having been left behind when he and the rest have gone to the beach. But he had found out just yesterday that the Dynamic Duo of Destruction (those were Yzak's words) had been preoccupied with something else, or so Athrun had said. It seemed like the novelty of annoying Yzak had finally worn off when they saw that Dearka had finally grown a backbone.

The two had gotten a part-time job at the A. U's TV studio, helping out with this little kiddie show the administration was planning as a fundraiser for the orphaned children in Orb. Kira could not even begin to wonder what the heck they were going to get out of it (except maybe the satisfaction of getting to help little kids...), but his two friends had volunteered to be two among the seven (each clown representing a color of the rainbow) to be the host of the show. So that was why Athrun had been staring so intently at the TV when he saw the bunch of clowns last Monday. The green and the blue clown had looked awfully familiar...

_Oh, well._ Kira sighed as he shifted little Akira from one arm to another and he proceeded through the parking lot towards the bus stop. Not only once had the songstress and the Justice pilot invited him to watch them practice, but Kira had declined all the invitations. Not that he did not want to, because he did. But he's been feeling really jaded lately, after that incident in the soccer field. Words of that Kian character, it never stopped sounding through the caverns of his brain.

"..._You're two of them. You came here when the cease-fire happened, didn't you? Don't try to deny it..."_

_"Oh, that's right. I almost forgot. Coordinators are too good and have better things to do than mess with Naturals. Oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Coordinator. Please don't kill me!"_

_"Like I would believe you, murderer!"_

Kira shook his head, attempting to clear his thoughts. No, he was not a murderer. It was beyond his control, those deaths... No one could say that he didn't try, because he did. He tried so hard... But there were just some things he couldn't control...

_Murderer..._

Kira shut his eyes hard and shook his head again. _What did Kian have against Coordinators?_

He looked up from his now giggling baby when he saw a flash of glossy reddish-blond hair in the corner of his eye. She walked like a phantom, not making the least bit of sound, even when she was walking on dead leaves on the ground. She was smiling at him with that small smile of hers he had seen on her lips last Monday. She had a large duffel bag slung over one shoulder and her arms were full of what looked like very important-looking papers. "Hello," she greeted, nodding her head since it was the only thing she could gesture at the moment.

Kira froze in mid-stride and blinked at her, waving uncertainly. "Uh, hello there." He remembered Lacus calling her Kari. He stared at her, unsure of whether to continue on his way, or wait for her to approach him.

She answered his question even before he asked it. "Wait for me."

And so he did, and he watched her glide towards him.

"I thought it was you. You look preoccupied, Mr. Yamato."

They resumed their walk through the campus parking lot as she fell into step with him. Kira did not bother to linger on the mystery on how she knew of his name. He was already too preoccupied as it is, what with these thoughts muddling him. These thoughts, they swirled in his head like miniature cyclones... "What makes you think I'm preoccupied?"

"Seen it many times, that look."

The Freedom pilot shrugged. "Nothing new. Don't mind me. Oh, by the way. I never got the chance to thank you for the offered help last Monday. Thanks."

She shook her head. "I didn't do anything except help Mr. Jule. And it never really occurred to me that he was a close friend of yours."

That left Kira biting his lips. He had to admit, he and the Duel pilot weren't exactly that close... He could remember the countless battles that they've had during those times that seemed like a million lifetimes ago... He felt an involuntary shudder pass through his spine. He hated those memories. He wished he could just forget...

But so many things wouldn't let him... That Monday had made sure of it.

"I'm sorry about last Monday. Kian, he's my brother. He's very... close-minded."

Kira missed a step as he stared at this mysterious girl. She looked back at him, an unreadable expression on her very deep eyes. "You and Kian are related? Well, I guess I should have known. Now that I look at it, he does look like you."

For a fleeting moment, a sad look passed her placid face. It was gone in a second that Kira began to wonder if it had been there at all. "I guess we do look alike. In a way..."

Kira nodded.

"You and Cagalli don't look alike, though."

Kira almost stumbled at the statement, and he swallowed hard as he tried to compose himself. Well, honestly, it was the first time he actually realized that. If he and Cagalli were twins, then why is it that they didn't look alike at all? _How did she know about me and Cagalli?_

"You must have been altered as well as enhanced, Mr. Yamato," the girl said as she once again answered the unasked question floating around in his mind.

Kira frowned, getting a little creeped out. "Are you some sort of mind-reader? Coz you've been answering my questions even before I could ask them..."

This made her giggle, which was probably the closest she came to laughing out loud. "I'm a Psychology major. I've had about two years of experience of dealing with people and their behavior, so I guess that would explain as much. I'm sorry. Please don't mind me."

"Really now? That's interesting. It must be nice, getting to know others' feelings."

"I suppose. I never really thought of it," She stopped walking as they reached the middle of the parking lot. "Listen, I have already told Yzak and Lacus about this, and I kind of wanted to tell you and Athrun Zala, too. It's about this thesis I'm working on."

Kira paused, stopping in front of her. Oh, _that _thesis. He should have expected as much. Lacus had told him all about it. It seemed pretty interesting, but still, being questioned about his existence didn't sit well with him. "Oh, well, you see about that... I'm not sure if I'll be able to help you. I'm not going to lie to you about the reason, and since I know that I won't be able to make up and excuse without you finding out, I'll tell you now that I don't feel comfortable with being questioned about it, really."

La Cruset's masked face flashed through his mind's eye, and he quickly shoved it aside. No, he should not think about those things. He was more than just a lab specimen. He was more than that. He just had to be more than that.

"I assure you that whatever's going to happen, it will not harm you in any way possible. This is a thesis that aims to help those who are having difficulty with the choices their parents made – like alterations and the like – as they are to live with what they really are in a world where not everyone is open to it. It's pretty unfair, isn't it?"

"What is?"

Kari blinked her deep eyes. "Having to be born without a choice. You were brought into this world without a say in your life. They mess with you even before you even find out you're going to live. Doesn't it make you feel sad?"

La Cruset's face once again invaded his thoughts. He quickly stomped on them hard. He will **_not _**allow these memories to rule him! There are other priorities now. Other people to take care of, other people to protect. He must **_not _**live in the past!

Akira suddenly began to cry, bringing Kira back to that parking lot, standing in front of that mysterious girl, who was peering up at him with that blank expression. He brought his free hand to his mop of unruly hair and shook his head. _Stop thinking about them!_ His mind began to spin. "I've got to go... I'll think about your offer. I – I have to – go..." and he staggered away, feelings of uncertainty overcoming him. His doll began to cry harder.

Kari did not try to stop him. He thought he heard her say goodbye or something like that as he made his way through the parking lot and to the bus stop. He had to get home. It was already four in the afternoon. He was supposed to change into his civilian attire and be back there by six. At around seven, the program will start with Lacus' number.

_"You'll watch, won't you, Kira?" _

_"Not even wild horses can stop me."_

_Lacus..._

After what seemed like a year, he finally reached the bus stop, where the bus was already waiting. He stared at the open door, then shook his head, flopping down on the bench like a rock. He heard the door close and the bus rolled away. Well, there goes his ride.

He did not know what was wrong with him. He thought everything was all right now... But then why is he starting to feel this way all of a sudden?

_Kian had called us murderers... _

_Tolle, Nicol, that little girl, and Fllay..._

_Fllay..._

_All had died. And I lived. And I didn't even deserve to live...Why am I alive?_

Akira continued to cry, but his voice sounded so distant to him. He buried his face in his hand. He hated being alone... He had to find someone. Anyone. Cagalli. He had to find his sister. Or Lacus. Lacus can make it all go away...can't she?

"You look like you're dying, Yamato."

Kira jumped as he looked up to see who had spoken.

The first thing he saw was the scar. It was such a nasty scar. His stern face came into view after. It was Yzak. He was staring down at him like something gross that had attached itself to his shoe. It was then did he realize that this was the first time he'd be alone with the Duel pilot in the course of their stay in Abashiri. The only time he had spent with him was when he was with everyone else.

He shifted his eyes from his face to the floor. "Oh, it's you."

"Don't look so happy to see me, or whatever," Yzak muttered, looking out into the deserted street. "I missed the bus, didn't I? Dammit. Just my luck. Now I have to wait for the next bus with _you_. And you don't exactly look like you're going to make it all the way to RQ without throwing up."

Kira tried to laugh. He ended coming out as a small pathetic squeak instead. "Yeah..."

Yzak stared at his still crying doll, a look of pure disgust in his face. "Can't you shut that doll up? It's annoying the heck out of me."

Kira turned to Akira. Man, the doll _was _noisy! It was making _him _annoyed! He shook his head helplessly, his vision clouding over. "Can't..."

"Oh, for the love of... give me that," he snapped as he quickly but gently took the doll into his arms. Uncharacteristically, he cradled the doll in his arms and lulled it softly. It was like watching a wolf lulling a rabbit to sleep. Akira cooed softly and giggled. "And you call yourself a Coordinator." He narrowed his eyes at him, suspiciously examining his face. "Are you sure you're all right? Because if you're not, I'm leaving. I don't want to be burdened by you."

Kira could not believe how cold this person could be, but what he really could not believe was that he was actually grateful for the company. He looked at Yzak's face and smiled. He eyed the scar on his face and grimaced. Every time he would look at it, it would make him feel terrible...

Yzak, however, did not appreciate his smile. "What are you looking at?"

Kira's hand flew to the bridge of his own nose. "Your scar... I was just wondering why you never got it removed..."

The boldness of his question surprised both of them and they were engulfed by a silence broken only by Akira's giggles. He watched the Duel pilot shift his weight from one foot to another.

Yzak stared down at him, his expression blank. "If I don't try to let it go, I'm no better than Kian and his gang... I call it a memory that will heal by itself. The war has left each of us our fair share of scars." He handed the baby back to him, straightened and looked away into the distance, where they heard a faint rumbling of thunder. "Yours just happened to be deeper than mine... "

Kira stared up at him questioningly. Those words did not sound like something Yzak would say. The first thing that the light-haired boy said, however, was what caught his attention. _If I don't try to let it go, I'm no better than Kian and his gang... _

That must mean Yzak knows why Kian was like that...

Yzak stared back at him. He stared for the longest possible time. It was so scary, having to look at him that way. He was such a difficult person to understand. But then again, he could talk. He knew that he was equally difficult to understand.

"Come with me. I want to show you something," Yzak muttered as he turned away and started to walk towards the campus.

Kira blinked in curiosity, but found himself getting to his feet anyway.

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

Lacus' left eye twitched irritably as her patience meter dropped another notch as Athrun missed another note on the piano. She smiled at him encouragingly, and he smiled back, but ended up making another mistake. Lacus gripped her mike tightly and sighed, trying to control her raging irritation as she looked out the window of the music room. The clouds were low in the horizon, promising heavy rain. She prayed that she was wrong. The whole university had been so busy with the Festival that it would be a shame if anything happened and ruined it.

The songstress tried to zone out Athrun's mediocre playing and sighed again as she let her thoughts drift to a certain brown-haired, solemn-eyed boy. Her time had been mostly eaten by insufferable practices with Athrun those few days. She had asked Kira to stay and watch her sing as she knew it would lessen the torture of having to listen to the Justice pilot's bad piano skill, but Kira had adamantly declined.

Not that she blamed Athrun for his mistakes. She knew that it was too early for him to play, but was forced into it by his music teacher, and since the dark-haired boy did not have it in his personality to say no to someone who really needed him, he said yes. Yes, even to the extent of having to embarrass himself in front of the whole student body. Too bad he had dragged her into it.

But being embarrassed was really not the first of her concerns.

Kira had been acting all funny since Monday, seldom talking or laughing or any of the like, except for that pillow fight. During lunchtime, which was the only time they actually got to get together in between classes and practices, he would just stare at his food and pick on it, not really that interested in listening to what she had to say. She knew something was up, something that involved Kian and his gang. But she knew that if Kira really did want her to know of it, he would tell her, and so she had just kept quiet, not asking him about anything, hoping that he'd open up soon.

The problem was, he never did. What made her feel bad about it was that she was seldom there for him, what with the practices, when she knew that he needed someone to be by his side.

"It's hopeless. Even Lacus Clyne is losing her saintly patience on me. All is lost."

Lacus blinked and returned her gaze to Athrun. His hands were resting on the piano keys, a tired expression on his face, his shoulders tense, his back straight. Lacus felt sorry for him. She knew that posture. His back would always stiffen when he was stressed. "Oh, I apologize, Athrun. It really has nothing to do with your playing..."

"Liar."

"Well, just a bit – "

"Still lying."

"All right. A lot about it, but something else is bothering me right now."

The Justice pilot knuckled his left shoulder with his right fist, trying to iron out the knots in his muscles. "Kira, right?"

Lacus nodded, looking out the window again. She heard faint thunder in the distance. She hoped it really would not rain... "Athrun, before Cagalli and I came, what happened? What did Kian say that made Kira revert back to his old self? He was doing fine until that day. I'm beginning to worry."

The former ZAFT soldier was silent for a moment as he joined her by the window. He leaned his hands on the window frame and took a deep breath of the now cooler wind. It was already four in the afternoon. By six, they were supposed to get changed. The seven o'clock program was going to be opened by the Deans of the six departments in AU followed by an invocation by Mrs. Kimberly Takano, and then they would play their piece. "Kian called Coordinators murderers... and you know Kira's issues, right? To tell you honestly, I fear for him. I thought everything was going to be all right, after the beach thing. Now, I'm not so sure..."

Lacus knew well of Kira's hang-ups. She had tried to offer him that if ever he needed to talk about it, she was willing to listen, but Kira would just run a finger across her cheek and smile, saying that he was all right.

_But I know everything is anything but all right..._

Lacus faced Athrun curiously. "Athrun? Why is it that Kira is still clinging to his past? Why can't he let go, like you?"

That made the Justice pilot shake his head. "Kira and I are completely different people, Lacus. I was trained as a soldier. I was prepared to face war, although I really was not _that _prepared, I guess. Kira, on the other hand, never asked to be involved in it. Life has been really unfair to him, if you'd ask me. If you think about it really hard, his life's foundations were on the decisions of other people. Look at him, forced to fight in a war, forced to kill, forced to witness death, when all he ever wanted was to live. He was blamed by people - "

"Fllay?"

"Fllay." Athrun gazed down at her for a second. "I'm not sure if this is really what Kira's feelings about Fllay are, but when I try to analyze it, everything in Kira's past had been nothing but circumstances he was dragged into. And to protect Fllay, to _promise _to protect her... it seemed to be the only choice he was able to make for himself. And so, when she died, he was shattered, because he supposedly failed."

Lacus frowned. "But that's not right! He shouldn't blame that on himself. It's not like he wanted to break the promise, right?"

Athrun raised his hands in front of him in surrender. That was when the songstress noticed she was shouting. "It's just my personal theory, Lacus. I really don't know if that's the real cause of Kira's depression. He never tells me anything either, so I try to formulate excuses for him, you know, for my own peace of mind because I myself can't understand him, and he's my best friend."

Lacus took a deep breath and held it in for a few seconds before letting go. "I'm sorry, Athrun. I didn't mean to shout at you. It's just that... I'm starting to get a little insecure of myself, every time he'd fall into his silent bouts. I would always think to myself that he'd be thinking about her..." she closed her eyes as she felt a relatively strong breeze blow in from the window. "Athrun? Do you think... do you think Kira...."

"If Kira ever loved Fllay?"

"Yeah," Lacus said uncertainly after hesitating a bit.

Athrun laughed silently. "Honestly speaking, I don't know. Does it matter if he did?"

"It does, to me. Now I'd have to worry how I'll match up."

Athrun seized her chin between his thumb and forefinger, staring at her directly in the eye. "Lacus Clyne, that was not a nice thing to say. Now take it back."

"But - "

"No buts. Lacus, you are a wonderful person! And I remember you vaguely telling me that Kira had actually warned you that there are times when he'd be acting this way. You don't have to worry about it. Kira will have to be stupid if he let you go like that just because of a memory of a bad-ass girl like Fllay, may her soul rest in peace."

The last statement made her giggle. "I take it back, Mr. Zala. I take it back." That seemed to satisfy the soldier and he let go of her chin. Lacus stared out into the field, where she could see a few dozen men hired to erect a small platform a few hundred feet from the tents they had put up. Lots of students were setting up their little booths in those tents. "That's where we're going to perform tonight, right?"

Athrun's back suddenly stiffened at the mention of it. "Yeah," he muttered quite bitterly.

Lacus tilted her head as she examined his scrunched up face. It would take a miracle to get their act together in less than two hours... "Let's practice a bit more, shall we?"

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

Cagalli grumbled as she tugged at her short skirt while trying to wrestle the leftover crepe paper into the remaining boxes. She had been working non-stop since ten in the morning, running around from one tent to another, being asked by the girls to make sure that none of the tents would end up collapsing and smothering everyone inside it later tonight. Cathrun was strapped to her back, and thankfully enough, she had not so much as said boo in the past hours while she was working. It was probably the weather. The nasty sun had stopped its slow and steady torture by two in the afternoon, but unfortunately, heavy clouds shoved themselves in front of the sun's face, threatening them with rainfall.

_I swear, if it rains tonight, I will SCREAM!_

"You all right?"

Cagalli turned around and saw Dearka pushing a wheelbarrow of about over three dozen small transparent plastic bags filled with water and some orange things floating in them, Miriallia following him slowly. "What are _those_?"

"Goldfish," Dearka said flatly as he grabbed on of the plastic bags and handed it to Cagalli.

The princess of Orb stared dryly at the fish bobbing inside the bag and grunted unconcernedly. It stared back at her with eerie unblinking eyes. "Yeah, I can tell it's a fish. But what are they for? And so many of them at that."

Miriallia smiled as she tweaked Stephanie's toes. The doll was riding on Dearka's back in a Snugli carrier. "They said it's a sort of traditional game here in Japan. They put these fish inside a huge tank and then for a sum of money you'll be given the chance to catch them and keep the fish as pets. It's supposed to be a very famous game. We're setting it up on that tent over there." She pointed over to the farthest tent and sighed. "Poor fishies."

Cagalli couldn't care any less. She tossed the bag containing the fish back into the wheelbarrow with its other fishy brothers and sisters and Dearka rolled it away, leaving the two girls to talk for a while.

Miriallia raised her face to the sky when thunder suddenly rolled somewhere from the east. "I don't like the sound of that... Please, don't let it rain," she said to no one in particular.

Cagalli followed her gaze and scratched her head. It really was getting a little dark. "Don't count on it. Those clouds look pretty menacing. But I sure hope not... Say, have you seen Kira around?"

Milly shook her head. "No. I saw him eating lunch with Lacus earlier. But then what else is new? He's still a bit out of it. You think he'll be okay?"

Cagalli snorted. "Kira's such a girl. Poor Lacus. She doesn't have a clue on what to do. And from what I've heard, she's having a hard time practicing with Athrun. That guy was born to pilot a mobile suit. But I swear, he's completely untalented when it comes to the piano."

"You've heard him play?"

"I wish I hadn't. I'm seriously expecting that I will love him even less after the opening act."

Miriallia giggled and eyed her surroundings, then turned to the princess. "Listen, I was over by the gym and I think this thing the peer councilors set up might interest you."

Cagalli yawned exaggeratedly. Just her shtick. Some more boring stuff set up way over yonder, along with the other boring stuff set up here. "What is it?"

Miriallia, however, looked really interested. "They call it Memory Simulators. I met Kari on my way here and she gave me a briefing about it."

Cagalli smirked as she resumed stuffing the crepe paper in the box. "Really now." Kari. Who was that girl? Always around them, especially Yzak. Not that she cared.

Miriallia peered down at her curiously as she tried to help Cagalli fight the losing battle with the crepe paper. "Aren't you the least bit interested with what it does? I kind of thought you'd like it."

Not really, but Mirallia looked eager to tell her, so she pretended like she wanted to hear about it anyway. "What does it do?"

And the girl launched into a description of the great invention. "It's really neat. Kari said it was developed by the Mechanical Engineering Peer Councilors of AU. The technology, she wasn't able to explain, but the logic of it was pretty much Kari's concept. It's no different from those flight simulators you used to ace in the Archangel, only this is more advanced."

Cagalli gave herself a pat on the back when she finally succeeded in wresting in the leftover decorations. She immediately closed the box. "Hmm, that sounds nice."

"It is!" Miriallia exclaimed eagerly. "It's a visual reality kind of thing. She explained it to me pretty well, but I can't relay it to you word per word. She said it's like getting sucked into the recesses of your own subconscious, where you get to face your memories as if they were real..."

_**What...?**_

And that was more than enough to catch Cagalli's attention. Her head shot up as she snapped the box closed. "What did you say?"

Miriallia blinked, startled at her sudden reaction. "I can't explain it that well, and so I tried it out myself." A sad look passed her eyes as she looked around to see if anyone was listening. When there wasn't anyone, she continued in a hushed whisper. "Cagalli, I got the chance to see Tolle again. That machine, it made use of my memories, and it formed an illusion of Tolle. It made use of the memories I had about him, of the memories on how I remember him."

_What the...? Why would they make such a dangerous machine? _

Cagalli stared at Miriallia as the girl lowered her eyes to the ground. For some weird reason, she disapproved of the invention. Memories... a machine that made you relive the memories... She shuddered. No, memories should not be relived that way... She looked over at the girl. "Milly, are you okay?"

She nodded slowly, then laughed. "I'm sorry. I'm all right. It's just that... I didn't know that I'd be able to see Tolle's face that clearly. I must have remembered him well."

"What did Dearka say?"

Mirallia blushed, a smile curling her lips. "He said... that Tolle must have been a really nice guy..." she turned her face to Cagalli. "But you know what? I saw Dearka in the Memory Simulator too."

Now that was weird... "Wait a minute. I thought it projects illusions of your memories...? Why was Dearka there?"

"I was confused, too, at first. But then Kari explained that memories don't necessarily have to be the past. I saw Dearka the way I truly perceive him." And her face reddened even more.

Cagalli grinned evilly. "And which is?"

"Uh... I gotta go," she muttered, shuffling her feet. "I just wanted you to know, because, well, you know... I thought that maybe you'd like to see your father..." and with that, she walked away stiffly, joining Dearka in the far tent.

Cagalli blinked, her eyes following Miriallia's trip back to her family. _My father, huh?_

Her eyes wandered to the direction of the gym. Maybe... maybe she did want to see her father's face... She felt suddenly overcome with momentary sadness.

Until she remembered her father having to self-destruct when he could have found better alternatives...

_My dad sure was stupid..._

She gasped when she saw from a distance two familiar boys walking towards the gym, one with light hair, and the other one brown. Kira and Yzak.

_Kira and Yzak? Now that's a pair you don't see everyday._

But even before she could ponder on whatever they were doing together, her heart was suddenly gripped by panic. Her eyes widened as she stared at her brother in terror as he and the Duel pilot slipped into the gym, unnoticed.

_No, Kira..._

_For the love of all that is good..._

_For the love of Lacus..._

_Not the Memory Simulator..._

Because the princess of Orb knew... that if it were up to Kira... whatever illusions that machine would project, none of them would be happy ones...

_Kira..._

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

The gym was a tall building with waxed wooden floors and a high ceiling used mainly to hold practice games and home games all over the district. But now it was crowded with students when Yzak and Kira arrived. The digital scoreboard was lit up, though, but instead of numbers, there was a flashing "Summer Fun!" on it.

The ambiance inside the gym was a busy one, and to be honest, Yzak was feeling a little irritated, what with the stuffiness in it. There were just too many people. And another thing was, he was here with _him_.

Yzak looked at the Freedom pilot with a wary eye as he saw him knuckle his temple unconsciously. There was a blank expression on his utterly pale face, and there wasn't much going on behind those lavender eyes. His baby was giggling softly in his arms. He elbowed him roughly. "You're not gonna faint on me, are you?"

Kira jumped, startled. "Wha - ? Huh? Oh, I'm all right. What is this?"

Yzak gestured to the middle of the gym where four bulky machines sat in the midst of many students crowding around them. He had discovered these inventions because of Mrs. Takano. For the last two days, he had spent majority of his vacant periods in the guidance office, talking to the kind old lady and getting free iced fruit drinks, and sometimes, helping her out with the computer work and the like. He really did not have anything better to do with his time, and so he thought that it would be good to do something productive. His help had been greatly appreciated then. Then, early that day, the guidance councilor told him to go to the gym and look around. This was what he found.

Four hastily done machines. They looked like recycled flight simulators, with cockpits that sort of looked kind of inverted, and a helmet-like device that came over your head down to your eyes. It looked pretty crude to Yzak, really. But then again, it was not so bad at all. Kari had explained everything to him. It seemed like she was the one who developed the concept of the Memory Simulator.

"One way to get over everything about your past is to confront it." Yzak looked at him dryly. "Your hang-ups are starting to get to me too much. I can't just stand around and do nothing."

Kira frowned at him. "What is this anyway? Why did you take me here?"

The Duel pilot gestured to the machines. "Those are Memory Simulators. They can help you get over your sorry excuses to act all anti-social and all that. Give it a try."

Kira looked doubtful. He brushed back his already too long hair out of his eyes and after a while of hesitation, he shook his head. "I'd rather not..."

"Yamato, be a man and face this off," Yzak hissed. He was tired of seeing him wander around aimlessly while Lacus worried. Although normally he really wouldn't care, this was just too pathetic to watch! Yamato was ruining the name of every man alive, be it Coordinator or Natural! Making girls worry. Acting all messed up because of someone dying! For crying out loud, it was a war! Of course people will die!

He clutched Kira's arm roughly. "I am sick and tired of seeing you wallow around in self-pity. It's not appealing at all. I suggest you get your act together, Yamato. You are hurting other people's feelings with what you're doing. Now get!" With one swift move, he shoved Kira towards the machines. He did not know he was capable of saying those words, but he just did, and he could see it had its effect on the brown-haired boy. Kira's eyes widened and he stared at him reproachfully.

"But I don't want to confront my memories."

"Why?"

There was a long pause and finally he spoke. "I'm scared."

Yzak felt his left eye twitch violently as he tried to burn a hole though Kira's head, saying nothing.

Kira grumbled incoherently, then took a tentative step towards the crowd. "Fine." After a few more steps, he came back to him.

"Now what?" Yzak snapped.

Kira held out the doll to him. "Hold this for me."

Yzak recoiled from him. "I don't want to."

Kira narrowed his eyes at him. "You talked me into this, Jule. Now hold on to my child while I check the thing out!"

"Ugh, fine!" And Yzak took the doll from him. Kira shook his head in frustrations and the Duel pilot watched his retreating form. He was eventually swallowed by the crowd around the contraptions.

"Goo! Goo!" The doll cooed and Yzak grimaced. So much for doing his good deed of the day... Look where it got him this time.

Suddenly, Yzak felt the hair at the back of his neck stand up as he sensed a presence lingering somewhere behind him. Clutching the doll to his chest, he swiftly turned around to see who it was. After that Monday escapade, he was not willing to let anyone sneak up on him unaware.

_Huh? No one's there. _He blinked in confusion. That part of the gym was a little dark, and huge boxes of art materials that the committee had used to erect the tents were left clumsily abandoned in the corner. Yzak squinted, using his enhanced eyesight to see if anything or anyone was hiding in them. He was never wrong with his instincts before. He knew someone had been there... _Where is he?_

"Hello."

Yzak jumped involuntarily as he heard that all too familiar voice. _Oh, nonononononononononono... _He whirled around and saw her again. Those eyes, that hair... This was the fourth time that day that he had been caught off guard by her. It was actually starting to get pretty annoying. She, a Natural, had sneaked up on him again. Trying to compose himself, he cleared his throat. "Hi."

Kari looked thoroughly amused. "What are you looking at?"

Yzak's eyes fell onto that dark corner again and frowned. "I thought I ... " he shook his head. "Nothing. It's nothing." He turned to her again. She had a huge pile of papers in her hands. She looked tired. The first time he had seen her a little down. Her hair, however, was still as silky and orderly like as if she had just showered. "Are you okay? You look beat."

She smiled sweetly, then gazed at the doll in his arms. "Where is your girlfriend?"

"What?!" Yzak blurted, his knees buckling a bit. "I... I don't have a girlfriend!"

Kari blinked in surprise. "Oh, my... I thought you're attached..."

Yzak felt a blush blossoming on his cheeks. "What made you think that?"

"My mom's project. Only couples take that class." She examined his face intently. "But I can tell you're not lying... Why then do you have a doll?"

Yzak fumbled for the words. He had never been so embarrassed in his life... "This is Kira's doll. Not mine. Kira's doll."

"Oh. Okay," she said, nodding a bit. "You are babysitting, then."

"Uh, sort of..."

"That's nice." She turned to the crowd of students trying to look up on the four Memory Simulators. "I saw him make his way to one of our MemS. Are you sure that it's a good idea for him to confront his memories now? He looks kind of unstable."

"How long will those machines be here?"

"It'll be open to the public by tomorrow and all throughout the Festival."

"How long is that?"

"Until Sunday."

Yzak smirked. "If I waited for Kira until he finally becomes stable, it'd be autumn by then. He has to do it sooner or later. Why not now?"

She tilted her head to the right. "Why do you sound like you care?"

Yzak stared back at her. "Don't _you _know?"

"Touché, Mr. Jule." She shifted the piles of papers uncomfortably. "Will you be here later tonight for the program proper?"

The Duel pilot paused and thought about it for a while. He really did not know the answer to that, and so he turned the question on her. "Will you be there?"

"I will."

And Yzak swallowed hard. He did not know what it was about her that made him feel so uncomfortable, but whatever it was, he definitely did not like it. "No."

That made Kari look like she was sad. She immediately recovered. "I see. Well, maybe you would change your mind... and I'll see you there? It will be fun. There will be a lot of food and games. And some fireworks later by midnight."

Yzak shook his head. "I'm afraid there wouldn't be any fireworks tonight, Kari."

The girl looked confused. "Why?"

"It will rain."

And as if to emphasis his statement, a bolt of lightning zigzagged through the menacingly dark sky, illuminating the gym with silver light and dancing shadow, followed by an ear-splitting crack of thunder. The gym erupted with girly screams.

Kari did not scream. Heck! She did not even look like she was frightened by the lightning. She looked out of the door, her emotions pretty much bottled up inside. "But it might not, right?"

Yzak smirked. "One thing they teach soldiers is that you have to know the weather as much as you should know the terrain. And believe me, it'll rain. Hard."

And for the first time in the duration of their acquaintance, Kari looked genuinely sad. "Really?"

Yzak bit his lip guiltily. Well, it's the truth, though! It really was going to rain. But he could not help but feel like he was the cause of this little mystery's sadness. He followed her gaze out the door. "Who knows? Maybe the wind will shift and it won't rain at all."

That seemed to cheer her up a bit. "I hope so..."

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

Miriallia turned to look over her shoulder to Cagalli and sighed. Perhaps it was a bad idea to have told her about it...

She smiled ruefully and made her way to where Dearka was crouched next to a shallow tank of water where he was one by one dumping the little goldfish. She stopped in mid-stride when she turned to the tent and saw a girl with short black hair helping him out with the task. She was smiling quite sensually at him, and Dearka was smiling back.

She turned around and was actually considering on going back to Cagalli, but she saw the princess was looking at something in the distance. She gulped noisily. Now what was she to do?

She glanced back at Dearka and saw the girl touch his knee and laughed. An unexpected surge of jealousy struck her, leaving her quite confused. It wasn't possible, right? For a person to feel possession over another when she didn't exactly own him...

But still, she was not liking the feeling.

Taking a deep breath, she walked up on the two, acting like as if nothing was wrong with her, and patted Dearka on the shoulder from behind. "Hello."

Dearka looked up at her and his lips parted into an unmistakable smile. "Miriallia!"

The short-haired girl narrowed her eyes at her. "Who's that? Your sister?"

_Sister?! Why you little...!_

Miriallia blinked in disbelief when Dearka stood up and so did the girl. She was wearing an extra short skirt and the first _three _buttons – three, by the gods! – of her blouse was unbuttoned, exposing a generous cleavage. The little slut! Miriallia supposed she was pretty, but she had too much make-up on.

What Dearka said next almost made her fall over. "No, this is my girlfriend. Cute, isn't she?"

Mirialle sputtered for words, her face reddening. "What? I – ah... "

Dearka stared at her with pleading eyes, mouthing silently, _Just play along!_

Miriallia blinked her eyes in rapid succession as she nodded. She stood next to him stiffly as he touched her shoulder affectionately.

The girl was evidently disappointed. "Aw, darned it all. Why do all the good-looking guys have to be taken?" She pouted her blood-red lips and sauntered away, leaving a very relieved Dearka and a very confused Milly.

Miriallia turned to the Buster pilot. "What was that about?"

He shrugged. "She was being a little too friendly." Then he scratched his head embarrassingly. "Sorry about that, Miriallia. I had no right to take the liberty of calling you my..." and words began to fail him as he stared at her sheepishly.

She shook her head and squatted next to the tank and began to unload the fish in it. She smiled to herself. "Looks like you've finally gotten yourself an admirer, Dearka."

He groaned. "Are you going to start teasing me from now on? Coz if you are..."

Mirallia giggled, turning to face him. He had a look of pure frustration in his eyes. "I'm sorry. Help me with this so we can hurry up and get changed for the festival."

Dearka's face darkened as he turned to look up at the sky. "Looks like it's going to rain..."

Miriallia pouted. No, she was going to deny the facts. ""Don't be silly. It's not going to – "

And in a silent flash of silver and white, the whole field erupted with crackling lightning followed shortly by deafening thunder. Miriallia screamed and cowered to the ground along with almost every girl in the open field. Dearka winced as he knelt by her side protectively.

"Yeah, I don't think it'd be raining tonight," he said sarcastically as he helped her to her feet.

Milly shot him an evil glare. "Dearka?"

"Yeah?"

"She was really pretty."

"Miriallia!"

"I'm kidding!"

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

By seven that night, the wind had started to pick up. It was extraordinarily cold for a summer night, and Lacus, wearing her Yukata, a traditional Japanese summer outfit, shivered as a gust of wind blew in from the west. She wove her way through the crowd of Yukata-clad students as she searched for Kira. He was supposed to be near the goldfish tent, but when she looked for him there, he was nowhere to be found. She stood on tiptoe as she tried to see over the hundreds upon hundreds of heads moving to the stage where the third Dean was making her speech. In a matter of minutes, she was about to sing in front of these people, and the one person she wanted to watch was not there.

"Kira?" she called over the noise of the crowd and slipped through the throng of people. As she turned around the corner, she slammed into something really hard, and the next thing she knew, she was on her butt on the cold grass. A pair of strong hands grabbed her by the arm and yanked her to a standing position.

"Yzak!" Lacus breathed. "I thought you weren't coming to the festival."

Yzak, who was still in his uniform, turned away from her and looked out into the sky. "I shouldn't have come. It's going to rain anyway. This festival will be ruined."

Lacus tried to regain her calm. "Have you seen Kira? I've been looking for him everywhere. What the...? Is that Akira?"

There in Yzak's arms, was a little doll bundled up in the Duel pilot's coat. "Kira's in the gym. I suggest you stay here where there are a lot of people. It's awfully dark in there. Besides, you'll be performing in a bit, right?"

She nodded, but her mind was elsewhere. "What is he doing in the gym and why do you have our baby?"

The light-haired boy shook his head. "He needed to do something. He asked a favor from me to take care of this doll."

Momentarily distracted, she stared at him. "_Kira _asked a favor from _you_?"

"Yeah. I'll take care of the little runt until you've performed, all right?"

Lacus felt like she was going to faint. It was not like Kira to leave a responsibility hanging. "What is he doing in the gym? Who is he with? Is Dearka with him?"

"An hour ago, everyone left the gym and he stayed behind. He's probably still in there. Don't go to him. It's too dangerous to go alone."

Lacus felt the panic rising up her throat. "You left Kira alone? With no one? IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DARK, DESERTED GYM?! Yzak! Kira could be in trouble!"

Yzak smirked. "He'll be fine. If worse comes to worst, he can always go into Seed mode and finish everyone off in a flash."

And that certainly pissed the songstress off! "How could you!" And she found herself dashing through the crowd, as fast as her legs could carry her in that Yukata, dodging people and objects alike as she heard Yzak call out to her.

_Kira... Kira... Kira... Kira... Kira..._

His name resounded in her head with every step as she made her way through the grass.

The gym was hidden in the shadows of the low clouds that hovered over it, its blank windows stared at her like a dead man's eyes. Kira was inside that building? It did not sound like him at all to go into that all alone. She paused right in front of the open door of the gym and inhaled sharply. Then, without thinking, she ran up the stairs blindly, and then once again, she felt her body slamming into something really stiff. She was off her feet and back on her behind on the grass. She looked up and gasped as a shadow loomed over her menacingly.

"Kira?" she asked uncertainly, and waited, holding her breath for the answer.

The shadow moved and her eyes adjusted to the darkness. Slowly, Kira's pale face came into view. His face was shining from what appeared to be water... or ... tears...?

Lacus scrambled to her feet and cried out. "Kira! Thank god you're all right! I've been looking over for you. What... Kira?"

Her eyes widened as she watched Kira took one wobbly step down the stairs of the gym, his expression hidden under the mass of brown hair.

"K-Kira? Are you all right? What were you doing there all alone?"

He didn't respond, but instead he did something else.

He began to weep.

Lacus felt goose bumps do the cha-cha up her arms and neck as she heard Kira's meek crying as he made his way down the stairs. "What... what's wrong?"

"I should die..."

Lacus gasped, her hands immediately flying to her mouth at what she heard. "What?"

"How could it be that I lived when so many others died...? Why, Fllay? Why did you die? Why was I so careless? Why? Why? Why? Why?"

At first, the songstress felt painful stabs like a hundred burning needles puncturing her heart at the mention of Fllay's name, until she realized Kira had grabbed her on either shoulder and was shaking her violently. "Kira! What's wrong!? What happened in there?"

Kira's mouth trembled as he wildly searched her frightened face with his wild lavender eyes. "Tell me, dammit! If I am the ultimate living breathing organism, if I am the ultimate Coordinator, why did I fail?! Answer me! Why did she have to die?!"

"Kira, you're hurting me!"

And suddenly, a light entered his eyes, and he recoiled from her as if she were poison. Vulnerably, he wrapped his arms around himself. "Lacus... I'm sorry..."

Lacus took a step towards him, her arms outstretched. "Kira, come here. Let's talk. What happened in there?"

And with that, he completely broke down... his face, his innocent face, crumbled instantaneously. And Lacus' heart shattered into pieces. She reached out, gingerly touching his shoulder, but he swatted it away.

"STAY AWAY FROM ME! I'm no good, Lacus! I'm no good! It was stupid of me to have thought that I could make you happy! Because I can't! I just realized it now. I can't make you happy!"

It felt like a million cold slaps across her face, those words. "Kira, why all of a sudden are you saying these things to me? I thought everything was all right between us..."

Kira started to shiver violently and Lacus tried to reach out to him again. He backed away from her, out of reach. "I wasn't able to protect her... what makes you think that you'll be all right with me? Get away from me, Lacus!"

Now this was starting to really get out of hand. Something happened there... something happened in there that made Kira like this...

Thunder rumbled from above and in one dash, the sky that had threatened them all day finally gave in. Lacus felt her body shiver as the rain pelted her with needle-like drops, and in a matter of seconds, she was soaking wet, her clothes plastered to her body like a second skin. She heard the people away in the soccer field run in blind panic as they searched for a place to keep dry.

She watched Kira, tremble uncontrollably as he shook his head. And again, Lacus tried to reach out to him. "Kira, I might be able to help you. Let's get out of the rain... and..." And the next thing that happened caught her off-guard as she tried to wrap her arms around him. With a wordless roar, he lashed out at her and the next thing she knew, she was off her feet, catapulting into the air. Lacus closed her eyes as she waited for the pain of hitting the ground to come, but none came. When she opened her eyes, she looked up and discovered that she was in the arms of someone very familiar.

"Dearka...?" Lacus murmured the Buster pilot set her down on her feet, his eyes staring straight ahead at the one responsible for the songstress' flight. Lacus blinked back the water that was blurring her view when she realized he was not alone. Behind her, she saw Athrun and Cagalli, faces unreadable in the darkness of the night. Somewhere in the background of the drumming of the rain, she heard three dolls crying. Their children were getting wet. But no one seemed to be bothered.

To her left, she saw Miriallia, also clad in a Yukata, move to her side and she turned to Kira with a look of disgust. "Look at you, Kira Yamato... If I hadn't seen it with my own eyes, I wouldn't have believed it..."

Kira backed away from them. He was shaking his head feverishly. "You don't understand... None of you would be able to understand the pain. Yes, we all had lost loved ones. But it isn't the same! It was the only thing I had going for me then. And because of me, she's dead! I tried to forget, and I tried to move on. But having to see her again that way... the way I remembered her... I just couldn't do it... I... I'm sorry... Lacus, I'm sorry..." and with that, he inched away slowly, stumbling a little as he bolted into a dead run through the rain, not caring where he was going. Lacus watched as he disappeared into the curtain of raindrops that pounded on the ground with a vengeance.

Lacus felt numb inside. She did not even feel it when Yzak suddenly stepped in front of her, his bluish-white hair a shade darker as it was wet and plastered to his face. She vaguely felt him hold her by the shoulders and peer into her face.

"Lacus... I'm sorry... It's my fault..."

Did it matter? Did it matter whose fault it was? No. It did not matter. Kira was gone and the whole world could explode into a billion pieces and she wouldn't care. She looked up at the Duel pilot's eyes, and suddenly, uncontrollably, the tears she had so desperately tried to hold back, the mask of the strong woman that she so strived to be, exploded... and the dam of pent-up emotions cascaded down her crushed heart. She threw her arms around Yzak's cold body and began to weep...

"Lacus..." Cagalli murmured as she felt a hand stroke her back gently. "Do you want me to go after him? I'll beat the crap out of him!"

Lacus shook her head as she buried her face in Yzak's chest. "No... don't bother... Let him... let him do what he wants..."

_It didn't matter, right?_

Athrun spoke. "Lacus, don't cry..."

_It didn't matter, right?_

"I wish I could stop Athrun, but I can't..."

_It didn't matter...right?_

And it was true... Tears rained down her face, mixing with rainwater. She felt her body shiver madly as she felt something warm draped itself around her shoulder; Miriallia was hugging her from behind. "Let's go home, Lacus. Let's just... go home..."

She looked up at Yzak, and he avoided her gaze.

_Why won't the tears stop coming...?_

_Why...? Why...? _

_Why...? _

_Why...? _

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

**_Yuugiri: (Hides behind a chair) Uh, hello... Gack! (dodges flying objects thrown by KiraxLacus fans everywhere) I just had to do this, okay!!! I'm sorry! Ooof! (is pelted with a rotten tomato) I'm terribly sorry for those who hate this! It's necessary for the OOOOOOFFF! (is hit by a flying squirrel) Plot... _**

**_(Sneaks off to a safe place.) Now, I'll just sit back here and wait for all the flames to collect._**


	19. Phase 19: Taken

_**Yuugiri: (Is hugging self while hiding behind chair) I live!!! I got out of that alive... well except for the random name-calling and threats, and pretty much bleeding through gunshot wounds... --"" (still smiling!)**_

_**Once again, I thank everyone for giving me the advice and support about the KiraXLacus break-up. I will not give away spoilers on what will happen next, but know that your suggestions will be considered and requests thought over. Please excuse me when I don't get to answer your questions. I really do read them, but I kind of want the story to answer those by itself. **_

_**Once again thanks to everyone!**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed. **_

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

_**July 14, AW, 12:10 am**_

_Kira opened his eyes to the darkness of the room and groaned inwardly, half-aware of a warm body next to him. He blinked, willing his eyes to adjust in the darkness. Where was he? _

_He tried to get up, but he felt his body give way to the heaviness. He felt weak and groggy, like as if his muscles were made of flan... _

Where am I? _He asked himself as he_ _twisted around to look at his surroundings. He found the place awfully familiar. He knew he had been here before. There was nothing much to look at in that room. Barely anything covered the walls except for white, rough-looking wallpaper. His gaze fell on the person lying next to him. _

_And his eyes widened in incredulity._

_"Fllay?!"_

_The familiar dark-green eyes of the red-haired girl drowsily opened as he inched away from her obviously naked body, covered up by nothing more than a thin, white sheet. Yes, he remembered this scene well... And he did not know if he liked it at all._

I have to get out of here!

_"Kira...?" she murmured sleepily as she raised her head from her pillow. "How do you feel?"_

_Kira felt his face warm up. He could remember having lain with Fllay before... but he could not recall having talked to her after it. Was this a dream?_

_"I... I'm all right, I guess." He swallowed hard as he watched her sensually smile up at him. A moment later, he felt her arms slip around his bare shoulders and she started to nuzzle his neck. "Fllay, no. Stop."_

_She didn't. She let her kisses travel from his neck and down to his collar bone. "That was an awesome night..."_

_Kira gingerly pushed her away and she looked at him reproachfully, shadows playing on her face. But Kira could clearly see she was a bit disappointed. He shook his head and said, "This is a memory. Just a memory. But then why am I in it?"_

_Fllay slowly placed a hand over his forehead and smiled again. "What are you talking about, silly? Your fever is gone, so you can't possibly be delirious."_

What's going on?

_Slowly, Fllay ran a hand through his hair and leaned her forehead against his. "Don't look so confused, Kira. Let my feelings protect you... I'm here for you, Kira. I care about you."_

_And she lowered her lips down to his, kissing him passionately, pretty much how he remembered her kisses..._

_"Stop... Fllay... Stop!"_

"Stop!" Kira yelled, his eyes shooting open. It took him a while before he realized where he was and what had just happened. Yes, it was all coming back to him. Those machines. The memories. The rain.

_And Lacus..._

Wincing as he slowly pushed his cheek off of the cold, damp, bathroom floor of their dorm in the men's RQ, he shook his head at that all-too-memorable experience with Fllay.

_Fllay..._

The thought made him shiver again, making him fully aware that he was soaking wet. He had run through the sudden downpour, away from everyone... from _Lacus_... She was trying to talk to him, trying to make him tell her what had happened in the gym.

_But I just couldn't tell... I just couldn't stand there and let everyone see that I'm a failure..._

Kira got up to his wobbly feet and staggered out of the bathroom door. Lightning flashed through the glass window, illuminating the furniture in the living room. The Freedom pilot found himself unconsciously counting, waiting for the thunder to follow. It sounded faintly after three seconds. He gazed around the living room as his eyes began to adjust to the darkness. The small digital alarm clock sitting on the side-table told him it was half past midnight. The carpet had muddy footprints obviously made by his shoes. He had run off all the way from A.U. and when he couldn't run anymore, he walked, until he reached their dorm. He groaned. Athrun was not going to like that, muddy shoes on clean carpet.

_Athrun..._

Then again, right after what he did, he doubted his best friend was ever going to talk to him without having to hit him first. But he didn't even know if he cared. He deserved everything bad that would come his way, because he knew that he did not deserve to be happy... He didn't even deserve to live...

His hand flew to his head as another memory flashed through his mind's eye. Once again, Fllay's angry face was looming down on him, screaming that he didn't fight hard enough, that her father had died because he didn't do his best. She had been right. It was his fault. His entire fault. And because of this, many people had died.

His knees betrayed him then, and he ended up crouching down by the door frame of the bathroom, his thumb and forefinger on the bridge of his nose. This time, a different face floated up to the surface of his thoughts. A masked face. A sardonic laugh. A deranged goal. La Cruset...

"_You shouldn't be alive! If people knew you existed, they would want to be like you!" _

Could it be that he was telling the truth all along? That he should not be living at all... ? Kira shook his head roughly. _No. No one would want to be like me. I am a failure..._

He felt his stomach lurch dangerously, making him sick. With all the thoughts swimming in his head, he was completely and utterly lost... Crawling back inside the bathroom with an agonizing moan, he threw open the lid of the toilet seat and began to noisily throw up.

Just then, he heard someone knocking on the door... _It's probably one of them, here to kick the crap out of me. I deserve it..._

And, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, he got up to his feet and started for the door.

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

The events of that night left Cagalli with a lingering headache. They – she, Lacus, Dearka and Miriallia - had arrived at the women's RQ a couple of hours ago. (Athrun had parted ways with them in search for that idiotic Freedom pilot, afraid that he might do something stupid. Surprisingly, Yzak went with him to help.) Because Lacus was in such bad shape, they had to take a taxi, however expensive they were. This was where they talked about everything. Everyone was shocked at what happened, except, of course for Cagalli and Milly. They knew very well of the Memory Simulator. And hadn't Athrun scowled at the mention of that invention?

And now that all of them were dry and warm inside the girls' dorm, she could not help but wonder where her brother was, and if Athrun had found him. It's been over five hours and the Justice pilot still hasn't returned. Yeah, it's been about five hours that she's been sitting on the carpeted floor next to three infant carriers where Stephanie, Cathrun and Akira were sleeping soundly, her pajama-clad legs stretched out in front of her. The moment Lacus got to her room, she never came out. Milly was there right now, trying to force some food into her. Five hours of trying to get Lacus to eat...

Cagalli jumped a little when someone suddenly shoved a pink mug of steaming hot chocolate under her nose. She looked up and saw it was Dearka, finally out of his wet clothes, and was wearing a fuzzy orange bathrobe over a pink towel wrapped around his waist. His weird ensemble all came from Miriallia's wardrobe. In normal circumstances, Cagalli would have made fun of the boy. But today was certainly not the right time. Cagalli took the mug and cupped it with both hands, then gratefully sipped the warm liquid. "Thank you."

"You're welcome. Are you all right?" the tan boy asked as he sat down on the carpeted floor next to Cagalli, propping his back on the couch. He also had his own mug of what looked like black coffee.

Cagalli stared at him from the corner of her eye and nodded slowly. "Shouldn't I be?"

The Buster pilot grunted. "Your brother just knocked off a friend of yours, ran off while screaming that he should die, and your boyfriend is out there looking for him, and to think that not a few days ago, a band of not-so-friendly Coordinator-hating young adults are running amok in the district, out for blood. Now tell me why you shouldn't worry."

Cagalli laughed weakly. She had seen worse situations than this. But she will not deny that she was in fact, a little scared. Kira, for all she knew, could be hanging from the end of a noose from a branch of some tree in the park, or Athrun could be cornered by Kian and his lackeys in some dark alley. At the memory of the Justice pilot, she felt her heart skip a beat. She hoped to God he was all right. There were too many possibilities, and what used to be their dream come true was immediately being turned into their worst nightmare. "I try not to think about it."

"Good. At least I don't have to tell you to cheer up. Everyone seems to be depressed out of their minds about this."

"And you're not?"

"To tell you honestly, I'm not."

"Now that's cold."

"Well, I'm just being honest." Dearka leaned his head back on the couch and examined the ceiling. He really didn't look worried, but still, there was a tightness around his eyes that said he was also stressing about this. "I know that you're scared that Kira might do something idiotic. But I'm not worried. After what I've seen him done, hurting Lacus like that, heck! I don't think he has the balls to end his pathetic existence."

Cagalli narrowed her eyes at him. Now that was going a little too far. Perhaps, Kira really was a wuss, but still, he was still her brother. "I can't help but notice a bitter tone in your voice."

Dearka frowned darkly. "He shouldn't have treated a girl that way. Especially not someone who cares so much for him. He's so stupid, clinging onto his past like there's no tomorrow." After a while, he peered down at her. "I'm sorry, though. I keep on forgetting he's your brother."

"Don't worry about it. Somehow, I do agree with you."

Both of them looked over their shoulders when they heard the door of Lacus' room open and then close again. Miriallia stood there in an oversized shirt, her hair still a bit damp, a tray of untouched food in her hand. Her expression looked like a cross between a girl who had been recently sucking lemons, and a girl who had been squirted in the eye with one. She looked a little pale, and a lot disappointed.

Cagalli guessed she understood. Miriallia was the only one among them who had actually gotten to know Kira the longest, aside from Athrun, of course. They had been friends for a long time now, and she was one among the reasons why Kira was dragged into the war in the first place.

_Kira wanted to protect his friends, and so he fought against his kind..._

Cagalli hated it. Kira was not aware that because of his grief, he was causing even more damage to the people around him. Grumbling to herself, she put the mug of hot chocolate down on the center table and hopped on the couch, leaning her chin on the backrest. "Milly, how is she?"

Miriallia shook her head forlornly. "She cried herself to sleep and I didn't have it in me to strong-arm her into anything." She went to the couch and settled next to where Cagalli was, then buried her face in her hands. "I don't know what to do..."

Dearka looked up at her from where he was sitting on the floor, then, after a few moments of hesitation, he let his hand rest on her knee. The reason, Cagalli knew, for the tightness around the Buster pilot's eyes, was Miriallia. And if ever it were true that Dearka didn't care about the situation, he still looked like he did. Or at least when it came to Milly.

"Don't sweat it too much, Miriallia," he said quietly, squeezing her knee gently. "What can I do to make you feel better?"

The girl didn't reply, but instead just shook her head.

Dearka looked at Cagalli helplessly, as if pleading with her to tell him what he should do. If only she knew, then she would gladly tell him. Shrugging just as helplessly, she turned to Milly. "Are you all right?"

The girl shook his head. "Cagalli... why is this happening to us?" She raised her eyes to look at the princess. They were red and a little unfocused. She looked like she was going to start crying herself. "We can never escape it, can we?" she said solemnly. We'll be forever haunted by the memories of that war. When will it stop?"

Cagalli didn't have an answer to that one, either. Damn, and she was going to be ruling a country soon. She knew she should _always _have an answer... It was annoying. She hated it when she didn't know what to say. Shaking her head, she turned to Miriallia with a serious expression on her face. "Milly, it will stop _when we say so_. It's our choices that make the difference and so in every misfortune in our life, we always have our share in the blame. Because we chose to take everything lying down. Milly, the hard part is over! We survived this war, and it's too stupid to even lose hope when we're almost there."

Dearka began to nod his head. "Don't worry, Miriallia. Everything... everything will fall into place. I'll make sure of it." He reached out and offered his cup of coffee. "Here."

The girl gazed at Cagalli, then at Dearka, and after a moment, she smiled however uncertainly. "I guess you're right." And she took the mug gratefully.

The three of them looked up when they heard the front door open, admitting two very soaked guys in billowy blue and green clothes. They saw lighting once again flash before they closed the door. Cagalli blinked in disbelief.

It was Sai and Kazui.

She had never seen them around for the past few days. Athrun had mentioned something about clowns, but she didn't know he was serious. But now, with the two boys standing there in by the door, trying to remove their enormous clown shoes, she couldn't help but stare in astonishment. "What the heck were you doing, walking around in the rain in _those_?" she asked in pure bewilderment.

The serious looks on both their faces were definitely a change from their usual crooked grins when they were up to no good. They still had a few smudges of make-up on their grim faces, and once again, Cagalli was going to have to let the opportunity to make fun of them pass. Man, that was the second time that hour.

"Yzak walked in on the final taping of Rainbow an hour ago. He kept on shaking us, asking us if Kira had been there at all." Sai struggled in removing his left shoe and threw it on the floor with a grunt. "He told us that Kira's gone mad and Lacus is crying, and then he ran off to the City Library, muttering something about everything _being his fault_. Can anyone please explain this to us? The kids on the set were freaked out and started crying at the sight of Yzak trying to strangle the orange clown when he didn't tell him where we were."

Kazui succeeded in finally taking off his socks and he whipped it over his really huge shoes. "We came here to know if that was Yzak trying to get back at us... And just our luck. No bus. We had to walk through that rain."

Cagalli sighed. The reality of having Yzak actually helping out to find Kira was still boggling her mind, but then again, she had always liked Yzak, in a subtle kind of way. And she could clearly remember that time when he had saved her life in the final battle. The Duel pilot really was not that bad. But she had these strong suspicions that he really was the one responsible for all of this. Was he the one who introduced Kira to the MemS? "Kira's struggling with his memories and guilt."

Kazui groaned as he tried to extract whatever water he could from his costume. "Again?"

Miriallia, who was on her feet the moment she saw her two friends enter, had grabbed two towels from the linen cabinet by the kitchen and handed it to her friends, sighing. "Again..."

Sai was silent for a moment, then he turned to Cagalli. His seriousness surprised the princess. Kira had told her before that Sai had always been the silent type. She decided that she liked him better when he was goofing off. "How is Lacus?"

"In her room. Sleeping. Why?"

"Why was she crying?"

No one spoke for a full minute. It was as if all three of them felt uneasy just relating the cause of Lacus' sadness.

Finally, Dearka spoke. "Kira lashed out on her, telling her and, well, all of us that we could never understand him. That the pain was not something we could understand about him. He told us that... Fllay died because of him..."

Sai's face darkened as he pushed his glasses up his nose. "What made him suddenly remember Fllay?"

Cagalli swallowed hard. She knew that Sai and Fllay used to go out together... She noticed Miriallia stiffen from where she stood, and even Kazui backed off a bit from him. Fllay had left Sai for Kira... "The MemS the engineering students built in the gym. Kira used it... and so..."

To her surprise, Sai cursed silently under his breath. "They used that? I've seen those machines. They shouldn't have made those."

Because of Sai's constant kidding around for the past weeks, Cagalli had forgotten that he was also skilled when it came to electronics. The memory of being a guest in Heliopolis flashed through her mind – that was the day she had first met Kira, too - and she remembered Sai working on a certain project then. For a Natural, he was fairly above average when it came to machinery.

Cagalli snapped back to reality as she noticed Sai making his way through the living room, leaving a trail of water across the carpet. She almost leaped to her feet to tell him not to step on the rug, but the expression on his face, that look in his eyes, she knew that he wouldn't have cared. "Where are you going?"

Sai glanced at her briefly, then at Miriallia. "I will talk to Lacus."

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

The tears fell from her cheeks and disappeared on her already soaked pillow. How long had she been crying? Not long enough, it seemed. She felt like she will never run out of tears... She had pretended to fall asleep so Miriallia would leave her to her misery. But now that she was alone, she was starting to doubt if it was such a good idea...

The loneliness made her remember watching Kira running away from them, trying to escape from them. Cagalli had told her why Kira had suddenly acted that way. And for the first time in her life, she felt genuine loathing for a lot of things. She had never really hated anything that badly, but now Kira was hurting because of those monstrous inventions! She hated everything about it!

She did not think it possible that she could hurt more, but when she tried to analyze the events of earlier, she would always end up breaking into a fresh batch of tears. It was a weird feeling, that pain. It was like some strange force was squeezing your heart, making it ache. She did not like it. She **_hated _**it... She wanted it to go away. But there was only one thing that could make her feel better, and that was the thought of Kira finally getting over his guilt. She did not even care if he did not want to be with her. She did not care anymore. It was just too hard to deal with rejection, and to expect him to finally move on and be with her was wishful thinking. She knew she should stop now, wishing and waiting for him to return her feelings... because she knew that her heart was bleeding because of Kira's words.

"_STAY AWAY FROM ME! I'm no good, Lacus! I'm no good! It was stupid of me to have thought that I could make you happy! Because I can't! I just realized it now. I can't make you happy!"_

Lacus let a sob escape from her throat as she turned to lie on her side when she heard someone knock on the door. She decided to keep quiet and wait for that person to go away. It was probably Cagalli, substituting for Miriallia with the food. She was caught off-guard when a taller, broader figure stepped into her room, obviously a man, his face unseen because of the light coming from behind him.

"Lacus?" the man called out quietly as he closed the door behind him.

Lacus sat up from her bed, surprised at the unexpected visitor. "Sai?"

"Hi," Sai said shortly as he stood there at the foot of her bed. "Do you mind if we talked? I heard from Cagalli what happened."

Lacus swallowed hard, not really knowing what to say. This was the first time she had seen Sai actually initiate a conversation with her; they really haven't talked that much... but what made her worry was that he looked so... serious. "Uhm, sure... Let me just turn on the lamp..." she reached out and pulled at the switch of the lamp sitting on the bedside table. She squinted in the sudden brightness, then returned her gaze at Sai and gasped at what she saw. "Sai? Why are you still dressed like _that_?" The boy was still clad in a billowy blue costume that was weighing him down because it was all soaked.

Sai opened his mouth to say something, but closed it immediately, shaking his head. "It really isn't important, Lacus." He looked around hesitantly and after a while, gestured to the ladder-back chair by the desk. "May I sit down?"

"Uhm, sure..." Lacus said weakly as she watched Sai slosh his way to the chair and sat down, his clothes making a loud squishing noise when he did. She saw water drip down onto her carpet and worriedly searched his face, his eyes hidden in moistening glasses. "Would you like to dry off first?"

"Not really. How are you feeling?"

The songstress blinked, then pulled her knees to her chest as she propped her back on the headboard of her bed. "Not so good..." she eyed him hopefully. "Have you, by any chance, seen Kira? I am extremely worried... "

She could not believe how much sadness it brought her when she saw him shake his head. "I'm sorry. I haven't seen him at all."

"I... see... " She tried to smile, but she knew that it was not a very convincing smile.

"Lacus, are you sure you're all right? Perhaps I can help you. I know that we're really not that close, but..." he hesitated for a while, then continued. "I know how it feels... I know it must hurt a lot..."

Lacus let her eyes linger on his face for a second too long and attempted at another smile. "Thank you, Sai. But really, I don't want to bother you with my emotions right now. Perhaps, if you really wish to talk, we can talk about something else...?"

Now it was Sai's turn to stare, and Lacus could not help but back away from the next question he asked. "Have you ever asked yourself that question, Lacus? Of what Kira really feels for Fllay. And the other way around?"

Thunder rumbled outside her window and the rain somehow poured even harder as Lacus tried to regain composure. It really was not her business to ask. Yes, she had asked that question more than a hundred thousand times to herself, but she didn't get any answers. Her lower lip trembled when she opened her mouth to speak. "I have... but just to myself..."

Sai smiled painfully, pushing his glasses up his nose. "You never really knew Fllay, but she and I... used to be engaged to each other. It was kind of arranged by our parents. But nonetheless, I cared for her with all my heart. I guess you could say we were happy together, but then, happy endings, they really don't happen when you're in a war. When Fllay's dad died, she was engulfed in hate for Coordinators, as you could easily tell, when you were on the Archangel. She tried to look for people to blame, even if we know that in a war, there really is no point in looking for the one responsible, because both sides are equally to blame. And so she found Kira as an outlet for her bitterness. She used him to satisfy her anger and helplessness by... by... " a flush came across his damp face and let out along sigh before going on. "By seducing him into a fighting machine, telling Kira that he should continue fighting until he dies or else she will never forgive him."

Lacus avoided his gaze and she settled her eyes to the floor. "I've heard from Cagalli... I know about that. But what hurts me is that I really don't know if I have the right to blame Fllay for what she did..."

"So you mean that being hurt and losing a loved one is a good enough excuse to ruin another's life?"

Lacus shook his head. "I could not agree with her means of searching for the way to rid herself of her misery, but I could not blame her for feeling hatred towards us. It is just as well. Many Coordinator hate Naturals, too."

"Well, anyway, I guess what I'm trying to say is that... that... Lacus, please do not blame Kira for this... It really isn't his fault for having been used that way. Although I still think he's a complete jerk."

That made the songstress wonder a lot about what Sai really felt about Fllay. He seemed like he himself had his own hang-ups about their relationship. "Are you saying that Fllay really was that... mean-spirited and she tried to get together with Kira for purely revenge? Didn't she love him at all?"

A grim expression washed over Sai's face at the question. He inhaled sharply, then let it out in a huff. When he spoke, his voice got louder and louder with each word, spitting it out with utmost disgust. "You know what Fllay said to me when we thought Kira had died in the battle with Athrun? She told me that she never really loved Kira! She told me that she still has feelings for me! Is that something a girl would say if she really loved someone? And to think that we thought he was dead! Is that something a normal girl would do?"

Lacus did not know what to say. The harsh reality of Fllay's attitude was something new to her, because she had somehow always thought that Kira's feelings were well reciprocated. But it seemed her faith had been grossly misplaced. How sad. Kira was wasting away his life by clinging onto a girl that never really loved him to begin with... "And Kira? He loved Fllay?"

Sai snorted. "Well, if you're asking me, in a way, no. He was simply looking for someone who supposedly _understood _his feelings. And since Fllay claimed that she did, well..."

Lacus paused for a while then turned to look at Sai directly in the eye. "And you? How are you with all of that?"

Sai was a little taken aback by the question. "Me? I... I guess I was never given the opportunity to think about what I'm supposed to feel about it. I've already surrendered to the fact that Kira had been the better man... Forget about it. But what I'm trying to say is, please forgive Kira... He'll come around. I know him. He's not normally like this. Say you'll forgive him when he comes to you."

And with this, Lacus fell silent. What a weird request... She had completely deleted that possibility that Kira would come running back to her to apologize. She had closed that option not too long ago, because she did not want to expect. And she was not about to change her mind. No, if Kira were ever to come to her, she will take the liberty of staying away... Kira was having a hard enough time without her to confuse his already muddled heart... "There's nothing to forgive, Sai. I totally understand. So don't be afraid."

And with that, the boy sighed in relief. "Thank you. He's a really good friend of mine and although we never get to hang out lately, I still can't help but worry about him." He started to stand. "I should get going. We would cover more ground if Kazui and I help out to search for him." He smiled at her. "Please feel better."

"Thank you... thank you, Sai." Lacus watched him make his way back to the door. When he was about to open it, she called out to him, getting to her feet as well. "Wait..."

"Yeah?"

"May I come with you?."

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

Dearka looked up when he heard the door of Lacus' room open and he saw Sai, in his ridiculous clown costume, step out. But he, along with Miriallia, Cagalli and Kazui flew to their feet when they saw Lacus appear right behind him.

"Lacus? What are you doing up?" Cagalli asked as she and Miriallia rushed to Lacus and immediately engulfed her in tight embraces. "How are you feeling?"

"We were so worried about you," Miriallia said as she pulled away and examined Lacus' face intently.

"I'm fine!" Lacus exclaimed as she tried to giggle.

Dearka stood there in the living room, eyeing the songstress worriedly. She sure didn't look okay... Her usually clear blue eyes were puffy from all that crying and her hair was a mess. Nope, she surely didn't look like anything that would resemble a person that was okay. And could anyone blame her?

The Buster pilot held back the bile that was rising up to his throat at the memory of seeing Kira lashing out and knocking Lacus so hard that she flew a few feet in the air. Had he not caught her, she would have been hurt. The disgust made him shake his head again at the memory of the moronic Freedom pilot as he vanished into the curtain of rain, leaving Lacus' heart in pieces. What a loser. And to think he liked Kira a lot. He seemed like a swell guy. All respect for him vanished the moment he saw what he did to the songstress, though.

Girls are not supposed to be treated that way.

Silently, Dearka looked at Miriallia, trying hard not be noticed he saw staring. He could not help but smile at the mere act of getting to look at her while she was unaware. She was such a kind person, always thinking of others... _If I could just have you caring for me as much as I care about you... I promise I will never hurt you... I will do everything to make you happy..._

He could remember that time when it was only in his wildest fantasies that he could see himself actually feeling these weird feelings for a girl, more so a Natural. He had always been centered on training and becoming better, but now, he was on Earth, going to school, taking care of an inanimate object, and playing house with a girl that could turn his knees into jelly with one smile.

He suddenly felt extremely sad when the thought of finally returning to PLANT entered his mind. And the promise of never hurting her and making her happy seemed like a promise that was waiting to be broken.

He watched as Miriallia looked over to him and smiled shyly from where Lacus was. Dearka smiled back. Yeah, a promise he could definitely not keep. He knew that one of these days, he had to go back... Then what?

Lacus suddenly speaking brought him out of his sad thoughts and back into that room. "Everyone, I am going to go with Sai to look for Kira. I am really worried, and I cannot just stand here doing nothing. Please do not wait up for me. I will be back when we finally find him."

Cagalli started to protest. "Oh, no you don't! I get to have first dibs on his ass! I'll kick him till he can't even remember what he saw in that MemS."

Miriallia eyed her. "Really?"

Cagalli paused, then shook her head sadly.

Dearka walked up to them and looked over at Sai. "I'll go with you. You girls stay here. It's not safe for you to be out at this hour."

Ever since he's heard from Athrun about that brawl in the soccer field, he had always been wary.

The princess of Orb sneered. "Oh, and I suppose your fuzzy orange bathrobe and pink towel would scare every threat out there, Mister Man?"

"What the - ! Hey!" Dearka exclaimed as he looked down at what he was wearing. His face paled as he remembered what Miriallia had put together for him while she had thrown his clothes in the dryer. "That was really mean of you!"

Cagalli stuck out her tongue naughtily. "Sorry, D. I just couldn't help myself."

"Yeah, well very funny, C. Know that I'll be changing in my clothes first before I go out and look for your masochistic brother."

The princess turned to Lacus. "I'm going with you guys. The more people looking, the faster we'll find him. Then, we can all give him a piece of our minds."

Lacus shook her head disapprovingly, then turned to everyone. "Guys, listen. I want you to know that I'm looking for Kira not because I want to tell him what I feel." That gloomy look in her eyes returned for a second, then was gone immediately. "I have no intention on pressing my feelings to him anymore... I've decided to be selfless, and let Kira handle everything by himself. I am going to look for him just to make sure that he's all right. That is all."

Dearka sighed in exasperation as he looked at Lacus' face as she tried hard to smile. _Yamato, you have a strong girl who would give everything to make you happy. And you're throwing it all away. I feel sorry for your stupid ass._

Miriallia looked over at him inquiringly. "I wish to go look for him, too, Dearka. I'm coming along."

Now that was something the Buster pilot did not like. "But Miriallia? You should just stay here. It's raining really hard and I don't want you to get sick all over again." He turned to Cagalli and Lacus. "That goes for the both of you."

Cagalli narrowed her eyes at him menacingly. "We're all coming, Dearka. All of us are equally worried about Kira. Stop trying to be a gentleman. You don't have to impress Milly anymore. She already is."

"What?!" Both he and Miriallia shouted, faces turning an unearthly shade of red.

Before Dearka could react, Cagalli had already disappeared into her room. "I'm getting dressed. This really is not the time to argue, Dearka. We will look for Kira and that is final. If you try to stop us, I will knee you between the legs."

Miriallia blinked, looked at Dearka uncertainly, then dashed to her room.

Dearka tried to protest, but Sai shook his head and walked to the door. "Girls, they always stick together. Don't even bother. Right now, I'm more concerned about Kira."

"But - !"

Kazui patted him on the back. "Oh, come on, Dearka. It's just a bit of rain. What could go wrong?"

The right question was, what _couldn't _go wrong? Another round of lightning flashed outside and thunder followed shortly after. For some weird reason, he did not have a good feeling about this.

_Please, let us find Kira before anything bad happens... _

He shivered involuntarily as thoughts of Kian and his gang lurking around in the dark flooded his over-active imagination, thoughts of having Miriallia around when they decide to strike again at them invaded his brain.

_Please, no..._

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

Athrun shivered as he rubbed his arms briskly to keep the blood flowing though his limbs. He's been almost everywhere in the rain – the school, Downtown, the Observatory, everywhere. And still no sign of Kira. Where the heck could he be?

The Justice pilot's been running around for almost five hours, stopping momentarily to rest under shades of trees or convenience stores all over the district, only to continue his futile search for someone who did not look like he wanted to be found. Athrun ducked under a leafy tree he did not know the name of somewhere in front of the Seven-Eleven shop near the City Library and leaned his back on the trunk. _Kira, please show yourself. I'm cold, I'm wet, I'm hungry and I miss Cagalli terribly._

****And he really wasn't kidding. For the past two days, he wasn't even able to so much as hug Cagalli, what with the practices he and Lacus went through. It was actually a relief, though, that the Summer Opening was ruined because of the rain. Now he didn't have to go through the embarrassment of playing badly in front of everyone. He would have happy-danced for it, too, but after what had happened in front of the gym, he didn't feel like celebrating at all.

_Lacus... I'm so sorry..._

He did not really believe that Kira was capable of doing such a thing. He remembered him as always being a gentleman. Whatever it was he did see in the MemS, it was definitely not good. But Athrun did not see it as a good enough excuse to hurt Lacus that way.

Just then, he suddenly felt that strange sensation of being watched. And then she spoke. "Hello."

Athrun twirled around and blinked as he saw her standing there under the shade of the Seven-Eleven store, her long, long hair hanging loosely down her back, an indecipherable expression in her green, green eyes. He had seen her around many times around Yzak and had automatically assumed she had a crush on the light-haired boy. But when Lacus had explained to him that she was actually trying to convince them to be a part of her project, Athrun had immediately shivered. That was exactly what they needed right then, more signs that said, _"We're Coordinators!"._

"Kari. What are you doing there?"

The girl gestured to the shop and shrugged. "I wanted to get some chili to go. My craving at this time of night. They're out of chili, though. You're looking for someone, aren't you?"

Athrun paused, then nodded slowly. Lacus had also warned him of the girl's uncanny ability to know what you were thinking. What an amusing girl..."Kind of... I can't find him."

"Who? Maybe I can help."

"Kira."

She nodded quietly, as if she knew all along who it was. "I sort of have an idea that it would be him."

Athrun wiped the bit of rain from his forehead and shrugged. Whatever her motives were, he really did not have time for it. "Yeah, well, you really don't have to get involved, Kari. But thanks anyway. You should go home now. It's dangerous to be out all alone."

Strangely, her eyes twinkled a bit and an odd expression crawled over her face. But in a blink of an eye, it was gone. "I guess you're right. But maybe this information can help. Kira is depressed right now, and depressed people tend to think in ways that would pretty much require little or no effort at all. Try searching for him in the place that he'd be able to access easiest."

Athrun frowned, then thought a bit. After a while, he spoke. "The RQ?"

She smiled. "Very good. You wouldn't even think of going there first because you think he'd try to avoid you. Look for him there."

Athrun nodded. This girl probably knows her stuff. But then again, she could also be wrong. Well, no harm in checking it out, so he might as well. With a final thank you, he rushed back into the strong downpour towards the men's RQ.

And as he rounded the corner, he looked over his shoulder to see what Kari was doing, but was astonished when he saw she wasn't there anymore.

He didn't even bother to ask himself why, because his head was already filled with enough questions about her.

_Who was she?_

_What does she really want from them?_

_And more importantly, how come she would always show at times when we seem to be in some sort of predicament?_

**_ï -- ï -- ï -- ï_**

Yzak leaned his head back to the wall outside the library as he let the water cascade down his face, willing the rain to wash his frustrations away. Unfortunately, it didn't. He had looked almost everywhere for him. He was still brooding over the fact that he, Yzak Jule, had made many people miserable. God, and here he thought he was finally over that... He hoped Athrun was doing a better job than he was. He had to find Kira.

_When I find him, I'll bust his friggin' ass!_

Yzak shook his head at the very appealing idea of boxing Kira's angst-filled head. No, however he desired it, he knew that it would not make things any better.

His eyes flew open as a flash of lightning slithered through the very dark, menacing sky, and he closed his eyes as he waited for the thunder to follow. Where could Kira be?

_Why do you sound like you care?_ Kari's neutral voice rang through his brain and Yzak's eyes shot open again. He did care, didn't he? Oh, God what was happening to him? He normally wouldn't even bat an eyelash about anything that concerned Yamato, but here he was, looking for him with the fear that he might suddenly decide to end his sorry-excuse for a life.

_Mother... how come I'm feeling these feelings?_

And all over again, Yzak felt totally depressed. His mother hasn't replied to his e-mail yet. Not once did he ever hear from her since his letter. Well, not that it had been that long since he's sent that e-mail. He sent it last Monday, right? And it's only Thursday... so technically, he shouldn't be worried... But he was. It wasn't like his mother not to reply at the soonest possible time. He checks his e-mail three times a day, waiting for her reply, but he would always find nothing. At first, he would find himself sulking. After a while, the feeling would wear off, but will be replaced with utter homesickness. After some time, the homesickness was replaced by worry about the things happening in the PLANTs.

Maybe... maybe he should just go home... Yzak closed his eyes again slowly, shivering as a sudden gust of wind blew through the trees. Maybe he should just... go back to PLANT...

"Yzak?"

Thunder ripped through the steady drumming of the rain and Yzak's eyes popped open, a snarl escaping his throat as he jumped up, startled by the voice. Staring out into the rain, he saw _her._

_Why am I not surprised?_

Kari stood there in the rain, her arms dangling at her sides, her long hair hanging heavily down her back as the rain beat down on her already wet body. She did not have anything on her except for a pair of jeans and a red shirt. No jacket, no umbrella. She never really struck Yzak as that kind of girl who would be roaming around in the middle of the night. He was having odd ideas that she really was a phantom, coming and going unheard, appearing in the strangest possible time and place.

"Kari? What are you doing here?" He asked as he leaned back on the wall, pushing away the white-blue hair plastered on his forehead.

The girl gathered her too long hair over her left shoulder and started to glide towards him. Another bolt of lightning sliced though the clouds, making those three silver studs on each ear glitter in the darkness, and revealing those deadpanned green eyes. "I was coming out of the seven-eleven shop across the street when I saw you sneaking around here. You're looking for someone, aren't you?"

Yzak wasted no time. If Kari was out at this late an hour maybe she can help him. "Have you seen Kira?"

Kari paused for a while as she reached his side and blinked. "No, I haven't. Why are you looking for him? I just saw Athrun Zala looking for him, too. I can tell it's urgent, but maybe if you tell me, I can lend a hand."

Yzak was somewhat taken aback by her willingness to help. "It's a long story. It really won't interest you much."

Kari continued to stare at him. Yzak hated it when she did that. He knew she was starting to "read" him again. "Kira has a lot of hang-ups that can be resolved by himself alone. The pain of losing someone is really hard to bear. But it is our desire to forget that makes us recover."

Yzak once again caught himself staring at her in awe. "You knew what Kira is going through?"

Kari's expression did not change. "My father died a tragic death. I know how hard it is to deal with a loss."

Yzak bit his lip. She looked like she just said her goldfish accidentally got flushed down the toilet. It was such a weird reaction, the first person he had met who did not break down while talking about her dead father. Mrs. Takano said that her husband had died in the war, so obviously that was not two months ago. And here was Kari, acting like she didn't care. What a creepy girl... He hated it. It was like she couldn't really care any less about the loss of a parent. So, addressing her last comment, he said the first thing that came into his numb brain. "Oh."

Kari blinked back the water that kept on pouring down on them mercilessly and threw her wet hair over her shoulder. The Duel pilot could not believe she could still carry the weight of her hair without toppling backwards. "We should search elsewhere. The Library is closed, and so I doubt he'd even go here. I know where we should search."

"Where?"

"The men's RQ."

"What? That would be the last place he would go."

"Perhaps for you. But maybe that is what he wants you to think."

Yzak fell silent, pondering on the logic of her statement, then hated himself for having to admit that she was probably right. "Fine. Let's go..." and he tried to take a step towards her. But even before he could move, the hairs at the back of his neck once again stood on end. Goosebumps popped out of his arms at the feeling of being watched. He stopped in mid-stride and looked over his shoulder warily. It was that same feeling again... like the one he felt in the gym...

Something was definitely up...

Yzak jumped when he felt a warm hand touch his shoulder. "Yzak? What are you looking at?"

The Duel pilot turned and found himself staring into those deep, swirling green pools. He shook his head and shrugged off her hand from his shoulder. He hated it when she touched him. He felt like he would always make a complete fool of himself when she did. "Nothing. Let's go..."

But as they walked off to the direction of the dorm, the sensation that bothered the heck out of him never left. It followed him all the way to Seventh, where he saw the last people he thought he'd see loitering in the streets. He felt suddenly uneasy. They should not be here at all.

_Dearka, I'll kill you for this..._

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

Miriallia wiped away the soggy strand of orange-brown hair from her forehead as she pulled the yellow raincoat's hood lower over her face. She, Cagalli, Lacus and Dearka were scouting around the empty streets of Seventh while Sai and Kazui had gone to search in Tenth. Cagalli had even insisted that they split up into two's but Dearka had adamantly declined, telling her that if anything happened to the princess, Athrun would not let him live long enough to say _I'm sorry_. And so the four of them had to search for Kira together, calling out Kira's name in any nook and cranny that could be a potential hiding place for him. But they were almost through the whole street and still no Kira.

Lacus shivered in her pink slicker as she peered under the nearest tree, and then sighed. "Where are you Kira? Please show yourself."

"Yeah, so I can beat you into submission," Cagalli added.

"Cagalli!" Miriallia hissed.

"All right, all right. I won't kick the crap out of you." She sighed as she adjusted her black slicker, then added in a soft voice. "Just... just show up. Please."

Miraillia looked up into the sky and let out a gasp as another white streak of lightning snaked through the sky. She quickly closed her eyes and covered her ears as she waited for the thunder, which came a few seconds later. Suddenly, she felt a pair of hands on top of hers, gently prying her fingers away from her ears. When she looked, it was Deearka, already in his usual clothes, the rain cascading freely down his tan face. He and the other two guys did not use any of the available slickers in their room because none of which could fit any of them. And so here was Dearka, running around in the rain with no protection.

"Are you sure you're all right?" she asked him.

He nodded and let go of her hands quickly. His eyes were alert, and he looked awfully giddy. She wondered if something was up. "I'm fine. Don't tire yourself out, okay? Why don't you just sit there by the tree and let us do the searching?"

She shook her head. It was kind of sweet that he always was thinking about her, but still, she can't just sit down. "I'm all right. Let's keep searching."

"Don't wander off too far. I have a bad feeling about this..."

She tried to smile as she moved towards the other end of the street, shaking off a bit if water that had seeped into her shoes, but in reality she did not feel like smiling. She was, in fact, completely depressed. Seeing Kira like that had totally made her sad and angry all at the same time. She sighed as she watched Lacus bend down and fix her slicker's buttons. Her heart ached at the sight of her puffy eyes, her tired face. She was so strong. And so caring. How could Kira do this to her?

_We all hurt once in a while, Kira. But it would always be up to us if we want to move on. So right now, I hate you because you choose to stay in that shell of depression instead of wanting to break out of it._

Cagalli suddenly spoke loudly, her hand shooting up to point at the end of the intersection between Seventh and Eighth. "Is that Yzak and Kari?"

Miriallia raised her eyes and saw two figures hurrying towards them, one was still clad in the A.U uniform, the hair telling her it was definitely Yzak. He was with a girl she had seen about only once before. She had the longest hair she had ever seen on anyone, and an aura of mystery as well... Cagalli said her name was Kari... She wondered why Yzak was with her.

Yzak wasted no time with greetings, and made a beeline for the Buster pilot, grabbing him by the collar of his wet shirt and shaking him vigorously. "You idiot! Why did you take them here?!"

Dearka grabbed Yzak's hand and shoved him away. "Hey! Don't get all hysterical on me. They insisted and so I couldn't stop them. I tried, you know." His eyes suddenly darted in every direction at once. "I'm not feeling any better than you are about tonight. Something's off... Like as if something bad is going to happen."

Lacus hurried to Yzak's side. "Yzak, have you found Kira?"

The Duel pilot shook his head. "Not yet. We're headed to the RQ. Why did you come out here? It's too dangerous here."

Lacus bit her lip guiltily. "I'm sorry, Yzak. I just have to find him... I... can't stay there and wait all day."

Yzak cursed under his breath. Miriallia swallowed hard as she watched Yzak's face scrunch up when he frowned. "Too late for regrets. I don't have a good feeling about this at all... Let's hurry. I've been... _feeling_ as if someone were following us..." and his eyes shifted from one place to another.

Miriallia's imagination started to run away with her, feeling suddenly self-conscious. The rain beat down on them even harder this time, making everything around them appear blurry and dark. She gulped as she inched closer to Dearka, suddenly feeling afraid. Yzak did not look like someone who would be kidding around or exaggerating.

Cagalli, too, was suddenly alert. "Then let's go. The RQ, you say?"

That girl, Kari, who had been silently watching Dearka, Yzak and Lacus like she was watching an interesting documentary, nodded. Each blink of her eye reminded Miriallia of a camera taking photos of the three Coordinators' every move. She shivered. Who was she anyway?

Yzak turned the silent girl. "Let's go."

"All right," she said. Miriallia blinked at her. What a strange girl... She will have to ask Cagalli about her later...

Just then, Dearka suddenly slipped his arms around her waist. Miriallia jumped a little, surprised by his action. She looked up at him. "Dearka? What - ?" and the words died in her throat as she saw the sudden deadly look on the boy's face. She felt him protectively put his free hand on her shoulder as a growl rose from his throat.

Miriallia's teeth chattered as she turned to Yzak. And she gasped. Yzak, too, had a ferocious look on his already ferocious face, his sharp eyes staring straight ahead.

Cagalli staggered forward, her hands clenching into fists. "You again!"

Miriallia slowly, jerkily, painfully turned her head to see what was going on, and that was when she saw them...

_Oh, God..._

In almost every small alley in the street, behind trees, and garbage cans and dark corners alike, emerged a boy wielding either a knife, or a bat. They could easily be over twenty in number, slowly and warily inching around them in a semi-circle. All looked like they were up to no good. They scared the heck out of Miriallia.

But the blood ran cold through her veins as her eyes drifted to the red-haired fellow who she immediately thought for some weird reason as the leader. The guy's right arm was in a cast, and in his other hand was wielding a heavy-looking metal bat. It glistened in the misty streetlights lining the quiet Seventh Street. And aside from the rapid beating of her frightened heart and the loud pounding of rain on pavement, Miriallia could not hear anything else. She clutched Dearka's soaked shirt nervously.

_Oh, no..._

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

"What do you want?" Yzak snarled, stepping in front of Cagalli. This was not good. His eyes wandered to the group of twenty odd snickering boys. All of them were armed. He shook his head in disbelief. He could not believe this Kian character would stoop so low as to corner them when they were obviously defenseless. And to think they had women with them. Hah! As if Kian would care! He could stomach attacking a girl while she tried to fix her skirt. What a coward...

Well, at least Ishi and Yalin were not there, and their absence somehow brought an indescribable satisfaction to him.

Kian spat on the ground and swung the bat over his shoulder. "Your head, Coordinator. Whoa!" he exclaimed happily as he shifted his stare at Dearka. "And looky what we have here! Yet another one of you Coordinator scum!"

Dearka's gritted his teeth in annoyance as he pulled Miriallia closer to him. "Yzak, who is this wuss? Is this the coward I've heard from Athrun who thinks that fighting girls is fun?"

Yzak chuckled at the sight of Kian's face twisting into an ugly frown. "That's him, alright. You could tell by the odds. He thinks it's fun to outnumber guys twenty to two."

"SHUT UP! We know what you can do! You ain't gonna fool us by acting like you have the raw end of the deal here," The a-hole snapped angrily as he slammed the metal bat threateningly on the pavement.

Yzak saw Lacus and Miriallia jump up, surprised. Cagalli cursed under her breath as she inched a little forward. As usual, Kari looked like she was watching paint dry. The Duel pilot turned to the bully. "Listen, if you're looking for a fight, we'll give it to you."

Dearka started to roll up his sleeves, and then loosened a few buttons on his shirt. "Prepare to get whomped." He slicked his thick hair back, keeping it out of his determined face.

Yzak started to take off his coat. "We'll take you all on, with one hand tied behind our backs. Just let the girls go."

Cagalli did not look happy. "I'm staying."

Kian laughed as he eyed each and every one of them with interest. His cronies all snickered with him. Man, did Yzak ever want to pound his face. "Like as if I'd let you go that easily." He pointed to Lacus with his bat. "That bitch is also a Coordinator. If you think I will have mercy on you just because you're cute, you have another thing coming. You and your kind should go back to where you belong!"

Lacus frowned. "Now that wasn't a very nice thing to say, Mr. Bully."

Yzak started to examine his surroundings, searching for any way he could smuggle these girls out of the frying pan they were in without getting hurt.

He found none.

All of a sudden, Kari gently held his arm and looked up at his face. After nodding to him silently, she turned to her brother. "Kian, please quit it. Violence like this is pointless."

Yzak stared at her wearily. "Kari, get out of here. You might get hurt. This doesn't concern you."

Kian completely ignored him, narrowing his green eyes at the serene girl. "I've had enough of you, Kari. I'll give you to the count of five to leave this place, and I promise you, not even one hair off your pretty little head will get hurt."

Kari paused for a second, then smiled. "Is that a threat?"

"Think of it as an incentive. If you leave now, I will forget the fact that you're a lover of these beasts, and if you're really nice to me, I might even learn to forgive you. Now, ONE."

Yzak frowned as he stared at Kian to Kari. What the heck were they talking about? He could not believe this guy! He was threatening to hurt his own sister! He nudged the girl with his elbow. "Scram. We'll handle this."

"TWO..."

Kari shook her head stubbornly as she wiped water out of her eyes. "I will not let him harm you. I still have to tell you something. Please listen. It's important ..."

"THREE..."

Yzak fell silent as he watched her. This was not the time to chat. Was this girl for real? "Kari, get out of here! There's no talking with this crazy guy! I'll make you a deal. Get out of here, and I might even consider helping you with your thesis. Now please?" He may not be able to get Lacus, Milly and Cagalli to safety, but if Kari were to leave, that's at least one back less to protect.

"FOUR...

Kari shook her head, still not budging and still holding onto his sleeve. "I don't care about my thesis right now. I have to tell you something."

Dearka gently pushed Miriallia to Cagalli. "Yzak, this isn't good..." he hissed as he panted his feet wide into his fighting stance.

"Yzak, listen to me..." Kari said urgently.

Yzak followed suit. "Don't have to tell me twice. If only Kira and Athrun were here."

At that, Kian blinked as if he was suddenly struck with a brilliant idea. "Oh, that's right! You have two others that are not here. Isn't that a shame?"

Now Yzak did not like the look on the bully's face as he said those words. He stood there stiffly and unmoving, tapping the end of this bat to his shoe as if thinking hard.

Yzak shoved Kari behind him. He did not like that look at all. The bully was planning something... But what? Well, he knew better than to try to understand what goes through a mind of an insane moron like him. He turned to the Buster pilot. "Dearka, heads up."

And Kian finally moved. He did not move that much, though. The Duel pilot tensed when he watched the red-haired boy slip the bat under his arm and, wordlessly, he snapped his fingers, the crispy sound almost unheard in the loud downpour. And, as if on cue, the twenty odd men behind him moved like snakes. Yzak clenched his hands into fists as he watched them surround them, forming a tight circle around the six. Now what were they planning? They're not going to beat the hell out of these girls too, are they?

Yzak could see Kian over the heads of his minions. The bastard was smiling at them sardonically, happily tapping his shoulder with his bat. He was going to make his underlings do all the dirty work.

Dearka positioned himself on the other side of the girls, baring his teeth like a cornered wolf. "Cagalli."

"Yeah?"

The tan boy stared at her seriously. "Can you hold your ground for a bit?"

"Don't insult me."

Yzak nodded. One back less... Cagalli positioned herself next to him, forming a sort of triangular shield around Lacus, Miriallia and Kari. Milly and the songstress whimpered silently.

And once again, the circle tightened around them.

Kian smirked his annoying smirk, then gave the word that made Yzak's blood run cold. "Take the girls. Don't harm them."

One cross-eyed fellow hesitantly turned to his leader. "But boss? The only Coordinator girl here is the pink-haired one, right? Why do we have to capture all of them girls?"

Kian snarled at him. "I'll have you know better than to question me, idiot! That blonde chick will draw that blue-black haired guy to us! I saw her kiss him on the cheek in the soccer field."

"And the carrot-top?"

"Imbecile! Can't you see that she's that other one's girlfriend!?"

"Uh, but boss! What about Kari?"

"Take her as well! I'll teach her to turn on me! Go! **_NOW!!!_**"

_Turn on him? What the...?_

That short order was enough to make even Kari gasp. Yzak watched the mob stampede towards them with an excited roar, raising their bats over their heads, out to capture their targets.

And all-out war broke!

All four girls – yes, even Cagalli and Kari– screamed loudly as the tidal wave of bullies engulfed them in a heartbeat.

"NO!" Dearka screamed as he dashed head-on to tackle a heavy-set guy that moved to try to snatch Miriallia. And in a flash, Yzak was dragged away to his own fight.

The rain made it hard for Yzak to see as he swiftly ducked from a clothesline delivered by a wiry, bat-wielding boy with close-cropped hair. He knocked him with a strong kick, sending the jerk toppling on the wet pavement, making him skid a few feet away. He tried to get up but Cagalli was on to him a second later, sending her foot flying to his ribs. The guy let out a strangled cry.

The Duel pilot cursed loudly as he lodged his fist into this guy that tried to grab him from behind. He watched him fall flat on his face. But there was no time to rest. There simply was too many of them. In reality, it would have been nothing for him and Dearka. But there were girls to protect... and he simply cannot be in two places at once.

He did not even try to count how many of the bastards he had knocked unconscious. Fighting did that to him; making him oblivious of everything else, and his focus was purely on the fight. But maybe he really was getting soft. It was too difficult having to fight while you watched more than your own back...

Just then, everything stopped moving when he heard that voice. He froze in his place as he was about to snap his knee to a guy's face.

"Don't move."

Yzak tensed all over as his eyes warily traveled from the ground to the direction where the voice came from. And the world immediately stopped spinning on its axis...

There, right next to Kian – that piece of shit! – stood that guy Ishi (so he was there all along...), a bandage around his head and a blade in one hand. On his other arm – _Oh, God. No_... - was Kari. Ishi was holding a huge chunk of her beautiful, beautiful hair, pulling her head back in a very uncomfortable-looking position.

Yzak did not know what made him madder; the fact that Kian was a total bastard, or the fact that Kari had stayed around. "Kian, what the hell is wrong with you? You're holding your own sister hostage!" he shouted over the rain.

And with that, Kian started to laugh. He actually _laughed_! And for the first time in the duration of knowing Kian, Yzak started to wonder if the boy was crazy. "Not just Kari, ass! Look around you."

He did not have to tell him twice. Yzak suddenly turned around quickly, and his eyes widened at what he saw. Lacus was held by a guy with a tattoo on his cheek like that on Kian's arm. The songstress' right arm was twisted painfully behind her, her face unsen through the curtain of wet, pink hair. She was shivering uncontrollably, from the cold of from fright, Yzak did not know. Cagalli was unconsciously lying on the ground. She must have put up a fight. Yzak saw three of the bullies rubbing their shoulders and arms, where, with Yzak's enhanced eyesight, he saw a lot of bite marks and bruises.

Miriallia, he saw, was kneeling on the floor, crying. Another bully was looming behind her, pressing a thin blade to her neck. Yzak saw why she was crying. Not far off, Dearka was lying facedown on the pavement. When he tried to get up, some guy with green hair sticking up in every direction even in the rain swung his metal bat over to his side and brought it down hard to the Buster pilot's ribs. Miriallia screamed.

He heard Dearka grunt painfully as he rolled over and started to cough violently. Yzak winced. That must hurt a lot, but it was just like Dearka not to scream out in pain. No one could have brought the Buster pilot down, and so Yzak suspected that Miriallia had been taken hostage before he was beaten into submission.

Yzak turned to Kian. "You wouldn't dare hurt them..." he hissed, dashing away the bit of blood running down his cheek. He could not even remember where he had gotten that.

Kian smirked again. He slowly made his way to Kari. When he reached her, Yzak almost wanted to reach for Kian and smash his face on the nearest wall. The bully grabbed a chunk of her hair and pulled really hard. So hard that Kari cried out. "I gave you your chance to escape... But you didn't listen to me. Well, it's not like I should care. I don't want you running off to get help, now would I? Traitor..."

Kari stared at him blankly. "You're a really disturbed individual."

Kian shoved her aside. "Don't talk to me like you know me that well! You can't read me like I'm some sort of book, Kari!"

Kari blinked, but said nothing. Another lighting bolt flashed though the sky, illuminating Kian's already wild eyes.

Yzak took a step forward, but stopped immediately when he saw Ishi threateningly loom the blade over Kari's smooth face. He turned to Kian. "Don't you think this is going a little too far? What are you aiming to accomplish with this? So you hate Coordinators. So what? But aren't you the least bit disgusted with yourself?"

Kian narrowed his eyes at him. "Shut up! You don't know what I feel!"

Yzak sighed. "You sound like Kira... "

"What?"

"Nothing." The Duel pilot crossed his arms over his chest. "So your father died in a war. It's not like you're the only one. But right now, right this very moment... Kian, just what the heck are you fighting for?"

_What are you fighting for?_

He's been asked that question many times before, during the war. Never in his wildest dreams did he see himself asking it to anyone. It was such a weird question. But a good one, nonetheless.

A deadly glint suddenly entered Kian's eyes. "You act like you know everything, when in reality you have been played around and you haven't even realized it yet."

Yzak paused at that statement. "What do you mean?"

Kian cackled hysterically, swinging his bat for emphasis. "You never realized it, Coordinator? Why do you think we know that you're here? How did we know that you're searching for your friend? Didn't it ever occur to you? You're such an idiot! You couldn't see past that pretty face. Didn't you notice that she was always around? In the most unexpected places, in the most unexpected times. She would appear when you least expected it. And she would smile at you and you wouldn't even notice her."

Yzak felt the sudden desire to throw up. His eyes widened at the realization drawing in on him. "No..."

"Oh, yes! Isn't it nice?"

_She was always there... _

_Trying to get close..._

_She talked to Kira..._

_To Lacus..._

_To me..._

_She was always there..._

Yzak shook his head, trying to forget what he just heard, but it would not go away. Still, he pretended like he didn't care. "So what? It's not like she got anything out of me."

Kari shook her head weakly. "I tried to tell you..."

Yzak shot her a deadly look. "Don't you dare talk to me!"

Kian was elated. "You think that she got nothing from you? She got so much more than what you think. Haven't you ever wondered why you never receive messages from your home?"

_What?_

"That's right, Coordinator. Since you use the same library computer over and over again, it wasn't that hard for her to hack your account. She prowls through your mail. All the time and she deletes it after getting a copy of it. Isn't that convenient?"

Yzak's mouth dropped open. "What? Those were my personal messages, you wench! Why?"

Kari's eyes pleaded with him. Yzak tore his gaze away.

This time, Kian was _really _happy. "And we found out something, Mr. Yzak Jule. Your mother was you to come home now, you know why? Because as of yesterday, you are officially one among the High Council of PLANT. So you see, we really can't let you go..."

He could not hear the rest of what Kian had to say. He was too shocked to hear everything... He was one among the Council now...?

"Yzak, don't listen to him..." Kari said as she tried to struggle free, but Ishi gripped her hair tighter. She started to talk again, but her voice was strained, and still dry. "Yzak, I tried to tell you. Many times. But I couldn't do it. You have to know something else... I tried to tell you earlier, but -"

Yzak snarled at her. "_Why?_"

Kari's mouth opened, then closed again. "I don't know..." Even in the rain, she still looked like she was being asked if she liked cupcakes. But her voice was purely resignation.

"Aw, don't tell me you're starting to fall for him, sister dear!" Kian said. He once again ran a hand through her very long hair and grinned. "And for some weird reason, I have a feeling he could actually have liked you, too... **_If you hadn't stabbed him in the back!_** Well, I guess guys really do search for loyalty, along with just a pretty face. And without the man you wish look pretty for, what good is your looks?"

The next thing that Kian did was what _really _made Yzak want to howl, and it took all his self-control not to lunge at him. With the use of his good hand, Kian pulled at Kari's long hair, stretching it out into the rain. Lighting flashed, making her reddish hair glimmer in the night. And, quite shakily, he took the knife from Ishi with his broken hand. He turned to Yzak quite madly. He really _must _be crazy! "Know that I'm serious, Yzak Jule." And with one shaky move, he sliced the blade through Kari's lovely hair...

Yzak couldn't control himself anymore. "Noooooooo!" he screamed even before he could stop himself. He watched as ragged locks of feet-long hair drop to the wet pavement. Yzak felt his heart lurch as every single strand fell limply to the floor. Laughing happily, Ishi let go of Kari's head, and grabbed her arms behind her instead.

"Kari..." the Duel pilot murmured as he watched the girl shake her head sadly, her eyes giving away nothing. Her hair now fell slightly above her shoulders, bits of it still sticking out in every direction. He turned to Kian. "Now that was totally uncalled for! Why the hell did you have to do that?" Bad question. Who could try to explain whatever goes inside a deranged maniac's brain?

Kian smiled at him as he snapped his fingers again, and Yzak watched all his men gather near him, dragging along a still crying Miriallia, a shivering Lacus and an unconscious Cagalli with them. He almost ran towards the man carrying Cagalli because he swung the princess of Orb over his shoulder so dangerously that it made the Duel pilot want to smack him one.

Kian sneered as he tapped his foot again with his bat, ignoring his outburst. "Look, Kari! He still looks like he cares!" He kicked at the reddish locks near his feet. "Now that that's settled, since we have all of you here, I said, why the heck do I want to settle with just three, when I can have all five?" His expression became serious. "Come to Notoro Misaki before the sun rises today. Take your other two friends with you. Don't tell anyone. Or else."

Yzak saw Dearka struggle to get up, his hand gripping his side painfully. There was a thin trickle of blood running down his forehead. He didn't say anything but his eyes were sharp and looked like he was about to murder someone. "If you so much as touch a _hair _on Miriallia's head, more so all three of them... I'll - "

"You'll what, Coordinator? You'll _kill_ us? Oooh, big surprise there!"

Dearka shut his mouth. What _was _he going to do? Yzak could not believe this. It was like this Kian person was actually _provoking _them to prove that they _are _beasts. The Duel pilot closed his eyes when the rain suddenly fell even harder. This was certainly not a good day.

"Yzak."

The light-haired boy opened his eyes. The very sight of her made his heart hurt too much. But the reality of finding out about her quickly erased the feeling. He looked at Kari coldly.

She stared back at him dully, her solemn face framed by now short hair. It didn't matter. She still looked pretty. "I'm sorry."

Yzak looked away. _You'll always look pretty to me, I guess... _but he stomped on the thought immediately. "Go to hell."

And with that, Kian snapped his fingers again, and his cronies began to move out slowly, like a parade through the rain. They were gone through the curtain of raindrops in a matter of seconds, and he and Dearka were left there in the middle of the now quiet Seventh Street, with his friend staggering towards him.

Yzak looked up into the sky and wished, just this once, for lighting to strike him down.

_Getting struck by lightning... It will hurt Coordinators and Naturals alike. If so, then let lightning strike all of us down... That'll show the lot of them that when it comes to living and dying, everyone is the same..._

He blinked back the water in his eyes. Athrun was going to have a fit... They had to find them fast. Chances are, the Justice pilot already found Kira.

Slowly, he made his way to where Kian had kicked the cut hair from Kari's head, picked it up, and stared at it for the longest possible time. It was smooth and silky. He had often wondered how it would feel like to run his hands through her hair... To think he had found that one person who could somehow read the emotions he had been so desperately trying to hide... only to discover she could mask her feelings more than he thought she could...

And for the first time in his life, Yzak Jule actually wanted to weep.

_Kari..._

ï **_-- ï -- ï -- ï_**

_**Yuugiri: (Still hiding behind chair.) Yuugiri, now you've really done it... You'll get the readers even madder at you for making everyone do this... (ducks a flying cow and whimpers pathetically) Oh, and if you're wondering why Kian is like that, getting all freaky and everything, I will let you wonder more. No previews for next episodes in this fic. Eeeep! (dodges a flying durian) Next chapter! I'll see what I can do!! Ooof! (is finally hit on the head with a baseball bat)**_

_**(Yuugiri now lies unconscious on the ground, waiting for the readers to completely finish her off for having the girls kidnapped by a lunatic...)**_


	20. Phase 20: Rescued

_**Author's Note: To all those who like my story so far (With the kidnappings and all. LOL!) Thanks so much! I'm also sorry for some of the readers who got a bit depressed in the last chapter... I was looking for a drastic-enough situation for Kira to grow a brain and a spine... And, well, a life-and-death situation seems to be the only thing I can think of! , To those who like what's happened in the past three chapters or so, with all the violence, drama and angst, I hope you don't take it against me if I do add a bit of fluff. (I love fluff!) And I kind of want to balance everything out and not make everything all angsty. **_

**_Oh, well. Thank you once again for the reviews. I will try to answer some of your questions as the story progresses._**

_**Please pardon this chap. It really isn't my favorite chapter... so I don not feel too confident about it...**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed.**_

**_0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0_**

_**July 14, AW :: 1:20 am**_

Athrun hurried through the deserted halls of the men's RQ, teeth chattering as he noisily clambered up the slippery stone steps to their room. He heard the rain continue its merciless downpour outside, making him think of the things he could possibly be doing with Cagalli at that very moment. Yeah, there wouldn't be any school tomorrow because of the Summer Festival that probably would be put on hold because of the rain, and so Athrun found himself daydreaming about cuddling with his Cagalli on the couch, drinking something warm while reading some nonsensical book about pirates or fairies.

Too bad Kira had to ruin it...

The Justice pilot frowned as he rubbed his arms briskly, trying to bring back the feeling to his body. He was failing miserably. Damn, it was cold...

_What are you doing right now, Cagalli? Are you sleeping? Or maybe you're up worrying about your brother, or about me... Don't worry your pretty little head. I'll find him. When I come back, though, there better be a hug and a kiss waiting._

Thinking about the princess of Orb somehow made him smile. She was such a rowdy little girl. Always wanting to have her way, sometimes a little too bossy for his taste, and majority of the time, lazy. But she was _his_, and so he loved every bit of her. He wondered what she really was doing right now.

Turning the corner leading to their room, he skidded to a stop right in front of their door, and, not even thinking twice, he knocked. In reality, he had his cardkey, and so he could have opened the door anyway, but if Kira really was in there, the last thing he wanted to do was to startle him or make the Freedom pilot think that he was there to hassle him about everything. No, Kira didn't need that right now. The last thing a depressed man needed was a litany.

He stared at his hands as he waited for the door to open. His skin was all wrinkled like a prune from all that water, and his feet felt awfully uncomfortable inside his leather shoes and socks. Cagalli would give him a foot massage later, he knew it...

_Dammit! Stop thinking about Cagalli! She's safe in the women's RQ right now, probably waiting for you, so just relax and you'll get to see her once you check if Kira's all right._

He snapped back into reality as he heard someone fiddle with the doorknob.

Athrun could not believe the relief he felt when he saw who it was. "Kira, thank God, you're all right! Yzak and I have been looking all over for you."

The Freedom pilot's eyes were pretty much unfocused as he peered out the crack of the door. "Athrun," he said in a raspy voice, weakly pulling the door open. "... hello." Athrun saw that he was still in his uniform, and he looked a little pale. The blue-black haired boy did not have a shred of sympathy for him.

He pushed his way inside the room after wiping his feet on the doormat. Not really bothering with any preambles, he plunged in head-first. "So, tell me. What happened out there in the gym?"

Kira stared at him dully, not replying for about a minute before snapping back into reality. "... What?"

Athrun blinked at him, then at the room. He grimaced as he saw the muddy footprints on their once-clean carpet, pieces of dead grass smearing green everywhere. To remove it, one will have to cut the stain out. Shoving away the momentary distraction, he took off his coat and threw it on the small hamper sitting near the bathroom. "Are you all right?"

"Huh?" the Freedom pilot muttered under his breath dumbly.

Athrun stared at him like as if he had sprouted an extra head. "What has gotten into you, Kira? You act like your brain just moved out of your skull or something." He started to struggle with his shoes and let them drop unceremoniously on the carpet, letting his feet breathe. No use in keeping the room neat. Kira already made sure of that... Shaking his head in frustration, he turned to his friend. "What made you do that, Kira?" he asked seriously.

The Freedom pilot avoided his gaze. "She was crying, wasn't she? Lacus was crying... because of me..."

Athrun sighed. What else could he have expected, after what he did to her? The Justice pilot knew Lacus. She was not the type to break down in front of everyone. So he knew that what Kira did was enough to shatter the mask that held back all the emotion that lay doormat inside the songstress' heart. "Kira, let's talk. What happened in there? What did you see in the MemS?"

When Kira didn't say anything, that was when Athrun got really pissed.

You see, the problem with depressed people – or people wallowing in self-pity and guilt – is that you can never talk to them normally, because they think it's a good enough excuse to feel what they're feeling. And normally, Athrun would have just tried to understand. But right now, he did not have the patience to deal with Kira's self-inflicted problems. Sighing in frustration, he turned to his friend. "Yes, Lacus was crying. We wanted to run after you, but she told us to leave you alone. But then Cagalli and I started worrying, thinking that you might do something you'd be regretting, and so I ran after you and so did Yzak, who's probably out there still looking for you. Now will you please tell me what has gotten into you?"

"Into me...?" Kira said silently as he slowly sank down on the floor, hugging himself as he started to tremble all over again. "Tell me, Athrun. Why didn't I die? I should be dead now, right? Why am I still here?"

Was this guy for real? It took him a lot of effort not to wring Kira's neck. He sighed and tried to calm himself. "Kira, you are alive because other people need you here. Cagalli needs you. I need you. Lacus... she needs you, too... And to tell you honestly, I'm really hurt with how you're acting right now, as if everyone could just go to hell now that Fllay is gone. What about us, Kira? What about your friends? Don't we matter to you, even just a bit? Can't you even try to understand our feelings, too? We're worried about you, you know."

Kira blinked as he stared up at him with those lavender eyes of his, and Athrun felt his heart ache as he saw one solitary tear run down his cheek. "Do you hate me for it?"

"To be honest with you, I would love to hate you. But the problem is, I can't. You know why? Because I can _never _hate you." The Justice pilot kneeled in front of him and placed a hand on either of his shaking shoulders. God, what has the war done to him? To them all? "All of us make mistakes, and I have my own share of those. Do you think it's easy for me to carry on my shoulders the burden that my father was responsible for many deaths that could have been avoided? I bear it in me," he slammed a fist in his chest, shaking his head. "Every single day, I have to wake up to that reality that my father had died because he brought it upon himself, and it pains me to know that he took so many lives with him."

Kira's lower lip trembled as he spoke. "It just isn't the same."

Now that got Athrun mad. Bolting up into a standing position, he dragged Kira with him, and not even knowing why he did it, he grabbed him by the collar and shoved him against the wall. "Then tell me, Kira. Tell me! Where does that differ? Do you mean to tell me that your grief is greater than mine? Do you mean to tell me that my father dying is _nothing _compared to the death of a girl who didn't even think about anything than to have you kill yourself in a war that you yourself participated in?! That Nicol's death is nothing compared to her?! Answer me!!!"

He watched as Kira slumped on the wall for support. Athrun knew that if it weren't for that wall, he would have toppled over. "It just isn't the same. I never asked for this. I'm not a soldier, Athrun! I was simply dragged into that war! I never asked for it!" He screamed.

"**_LIAR!_**" Athrun roared, surprising even himself. "You didn't simply _get dragged _into that war, Kira Yamato! You jumped in _head first_! And do you know why? **_IT'S BECAUSE YOU WANTED TO PROTECT YOUR FRIENDS!_** You said so yourself! Do you see it, Kira??! You _had _a choice!!! And you _CHOSE_ to get into that war!"

With that, Kira started to sputter. "I _had _no choice! They were there!!! You! It was your entire fault! You planted the bombs in Heliopolis! If you hadn't done that, this never would have happened!"

"Now you have it backwards, Kira! _I_was the one who didn't have a choice! _I _was a soldier! _I_ had orders to follow! And you know what makes us different from each other, huh, Kira? Although I had been pretty much devastated, _I _was man enough to recover! Now stop being a self-righteous prick, giving yourself too much credit, telling everyone that you didn't have a choice! You know why? I'll tell you why!!! **_IT"S BECAUSE WE WILL ALWAYS HAVE A FRIGGIN' CHOICE!!!_**"

And with that, Kira broke down completely. "All right, Athrun! I _chose _to protect those people! I _chose _to get into that war! I _chose _to fight for peace! But they didn't actually _choose _to die on me, either! They didn't want that!"

Athrun clenched his hands into fists and tried very hard not to slam his fist into Kira's face. No, he had to keep calm. He was always calm. Now should not be any different. "Who wanted to die, Kira? I hated that as much as you did, but I think it's a no-brainer for me to say that it really was beyond our control. We can't turn back time or try to redo everything because we didn't do it perfectly, but we do have the choice if we want to learn from it all." He shook his head, suddenly feeling very tired. He needed to change and go to Cagalli soon. Cagalli would calm him down. He will have to leave Kira to his misery. He was starting to lose his patience, and to think that seldom happened. "Do whatever you want, Kira. I really don't know what to say to you anymore." He shook his head and started for his room. "I'm getting dressed and going to Cagalli. See you around."

Kira stared at him forlornly and slowly, he slid down the face of the wall and ended up sitting quite pathetically on his rear. "I'm sorry, Athrun... I'm sorry."

Athrun sniffed loudly. "Tell that to Lacus, the only person in the entire universe who'd want to deal with your pathetic hang-ups." And he moved slowly across the room, dragging his feet along the muddy carpet.

He was about to reach his room when he suddenly jumped up, startled, when their door burst open and noisily hit the wall. Even Kira jumped.

Athrun whirled around and gasped as Yzak staggered inside the room, followed by a very beat-up-looking Dearka. Without thinking, the Justice pilot ran to them. "Yzak! Dearka! What - "

Yzak didn't allow him to finish. It was then did he notice a small trickle of blood smeared across the Duel pilot's face. Staring at him with unreadable eyes, the light-haired boy spoke the words that made his heart stop cold. "Kian and his gang have taken the girls. He wants us in Notoro Misaki before the sun rises."

And everything seemed like it was crumbling into pieces. Athrun felt the world tilt dangerously to the right. It was only then did he realize he was leaning on the couch for support. He felt like he wanted to throw up. No. This wasn't happening..."They took them...? Cagalli...They took Cagalli?"

Yzak stared at him like a person who was terribly shaken but was trying very hard not to show it. He nodded. "I'm sorry. We tried to stop them, but they had us outnumbered."

Dearka said nothing to him, but immediately sank to his knees, his hand pressed to his side. He didn't look like he was okay, but there was a look in his eyes that made him seem awfully deadly. It was not everyday that one could see Dearka like that. "They took them... they took Miriallia, too... and she didn't have anything to do with this... "

Yzak stared at Athrun, then at the still cowering Kira. "You. Get up. We need you there with us."

Kira stared back at him with the same blank, unchanging expression. "I... can't... I... " he suddenly shook his head, as if trying to clear it. Then he swallowed hard. "They took Lacus, too...?"

"Damn right they did, Yamato." The Buster pilot eyed him warily.

Athrun's hand flew to his temple and started to think. Dammit! He couldn't think straight! Cagalli had not been sleeping in her bed. She had not been up thinking about him at all. She had been out there in the rain, looking for her idiotic brother, and now she was captured by demented anti-Coordinator freaks! He had to think! He had to!

_Oh, God. Cagalli... Please be safe...I will die if anything ever happened to you..._

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_So... many... stars... dancing stars... _

Cagalli groggily opened her eyes and winced as the smallest movement she did with her head sent jolts of pain through her skull. She blinked several times and tried to focus her vision, but the small stars that danced a jig in front of her eyes did not go away. After a while that was when everything came back to her. The sudden tidal wave of memories caused anger to flow through her veins. And, sitting up with effort, she looked around. Not that were was anything to see. It was completely dark, and the only things she could make out were shapeless lumps lying on the floor next to her. The only sound she heard was silent weeping.

It was damp where she sat, and there was a faint smell of old newspaper. Ignoring the pain in her head, she tried to reach for her temple. But that was when she discovered her hands were tied behind her back. The knowledge of this made her even madder. She was about to scream in frustration when someone beside her spoke.

"Cagalli? Are you finally awake?" It was Miriallia's voice.

The princess of Orb's head shot up and sighed at knowing that she was all right. "Milly! You're all right! Where is Lacus?"

"I'm here," came Lacus' faint voice from somewhere in her far right.

"Is everyone fine?" Cagalli asked, struggling with the ropes binding her wrists. They were too tight. _When I get my hands on those bullies... _

Cagalli heard Lacus scuttle to her feet and moments later, she felt the songstress' wet body brush up against her. "I think my wrist is broken..."

"Oh, darned it! I can't take a look at it in the dark... Does it hurt?" Miriallia asked.

"I'm fine. But it does hurt..."

The princess frowned in the darkness. "Where are we?"

"They loaded us up into their van," Lacus said quietly, "And drove for about half an hour through the highway. I heard them talk about an abandoned shelter here, or something. How's your head?"

The princess tried to loosen the tight muscles in her neck. They must have carried her like a sack of potatoes, the way her neck hurt... "I'm all right. Why on Earth is it so dark, anyway?"

"They stuffed us here about an hour ago. I think this is like a storage area or something," Miriallia explained as she, too, seemed to struggle with her position. Cagalli assumed she was also bound.

"Maybe I can get these ropes loose..." the blond-haired girl said as she tried to get a good grip on the ropes, but a voice that came from somewhere behind her made her jump.

"Can you untie us?"

Cagalli looked over her shoulder warily, uncertainly blinking in the darkness. "Kari?"

And the room fell into dead silence. Miriallia was the one who broke it. "What... what are you doing here?"

"Pretty much what you're doing here, too: nothing." There was a lot of scuttling in her corner of the room, then she spoke. "We have to get out of here."

Well, duh. Cagalli didn't have to be told what to do with this situation, but with the looks of things, everything was easier said than done. She wanted to think that Athrun was on his way to rescue her, but she was a princess, and as much as she trusted the Justice pilot with her life, she knew that it was better not to expect help in these drastic circumstances. She had to know how to fend for herself. And so as far as she was concerned, no help was coming.

Lacus spoke even before she could utter a word. "Kari, why did your brother do this to you?"

Cagalli frowned. What the heck was Lacus asking?

Kari answered almost instantaneously. "I'm surprised you didn't buy whatever Kian told Yzak."

Lacus groaned as Cagalli heard her shift a bit. Someone had to take a look at her arm soon. "You wanted to say something else... Yzak didn't listen to you, so I know that there is another side of your story."

As much as the princess found it awfully amusing to listen to Lacus and Kari talk about these kinds of things in the dark while they were tied, she really had no patience for it at the moment. She shifted from one side to another, making sure her legs weren't going to fall asleep, just in case they had to make a swift escape. (Given it was possible...)

There was a moment of silence and then Kari spoke. "What Kian said was not all untrue. I... hacked Yzak's account, yes. But... it was for a different cause."

"That was still wrong of you, Kari." Milly pointed out.

"I know. But that's really not the issue here," Kari replied.

"What's going on anyway?"Lacus asked.

Cagalli shivered involuntarily. This really was not necessary at the moment. They were trapped and they had to get out. She turned to where Kari's voice was coming from. "They took us to lure the boys here, didn't they? Do you know what they're planning, Kari?"

"No. But trust me, whatever it is, it's going to be really crazy. That is, if they planned anything at all."

Cagalli frowned and narrowed her eyes in the darkness. "You seem awfully calm about this."

"This isn't the first time this happened."

Now that was certainly unexpected. "Don't tell me you've been held hostage before?"

"No. This is not the only case of harassment my brother has been in, always knowing who to target next." She continued with utmost distaste. "Now I know why."

The princess of Orb gave the ropes another try, until what Kari said finally dawned to her. "Wait, you mean Kian had always known who to target next? How did they know that Kira and the rest are Coordinators?"

"It was all because of me."

"_What? _You're confusing me..."

"My thesis required me to study genetically enhanced and genetically altered individuals, and so for the past two years, I've gathered subjects for my study. I, being one among them who knows how it feels to be 'non-Natural' and 'non-Coordinator', have tried to make them feel at home. I looked for your profile while searching for more subjects when my mother told me about you, and I found out that your friends were not just altered, but were enhanced." She paused for a bit and continued after obviously trying to shift her position. "I found out the same time you did that Kian is just like me; he hacks other people's accounts. You really can't tell who's enhanced or altered by just looking at them, but when Kian knew about Yzak's e-mails, I knew he was sticking his nose in my documents. And he had to say those things to make sure Yzak won't listen to me."

Cagalli stared at her in the darkness, dumbly blinking at what she just heard. Realization it her. "Wait a minute... You hacked Yzak's account? And you're still _alive_?"

"I hacked his account not just for the fun of it, Cagalli. I needed it for my research..."

"Oh, of course. How silly of me. Your research. And Yzak's feelings could all just go to hell, then?" Cagalli snapped.

"I... " Kari stammered, then sighed at the shallowness of her cause. "No. Yzak's feelings... mattered... That was why I tried to tell him... I wanted to tell him and apologize. I didn't mean to erase the message, really... but he... he just wouldn't listen..."

Lacus, who had been silent all throughout the conversation, finally asked something. "Why did you erase it then?"

And once again, there was silence. Cagalli did not know why she felt like she knew the answer. "I found out that his mother wanted him to return to PLANT... and I... "

"You didn't want him to go," Miriallia continued.

Kari sighed. "I don't know."

Cagalli groaned in frustration. All this because of a silly crush of a person who shows no emotion at all to a person who probably came close to being a rock. "Let me ask you one thing, though. Is your brother... whacked?"

There was an uncomfortable shifting in the room.

And the answer Cagalli received made her blood run cold.

"Right now, I think he already is."

_Oh, God. Athrun. Be careful..._

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Dearka didn't know if he was going to kill Kira with his bare hands, or kill him with the kitchen knife lying ever so conveniently on the dining table not a few feet away. Here they were, wide awake at one in the morning, cold, shivering and hungry, with probably a broken rib or two, and there was Kira, crawling around on the ground, feeling sorry for himself!

No! They did not have the time for this. The girls – Miriallia – was in danger. He had to get her back. Those goons... they had some nerve, pointing a deadly weapon at her. They better not be touching her....

He let his hand fly to his side, wincing inwardly as he felt bones grinding with every movement. He had felt worse, and seen worse than this little bruise... which was a joke. He knew it was more than a little bruise. Damn metal bat... Why the heck do they make those anyway?

Yzak seemed to have noticed him holding on to his side. He turned to him. "Are you up for this?"

Dearka stared at the light-haired boy searchingly, trying to identify the many emotions clouding his usually clear blue eyes. He had heard everything, that girl Kari betraying his trust, a trust which was seldom given freely... he could almost see hurt in those eyes. He nodded at him. "I'm fine. We should get going."

Athrun, who had been in a state of shock for about ten minutes now after finding out Cagalli had been taken, finally snapped out of his reverie and turned to Yzak and him. "Were they hurt?"

Dearka froze. If they told him Cagalli had been knocked unconscious and hoisted over some guy's shoulder without a care in the world, he'd rush out there with the rationality of a bag of chips and most likely get mugging, one to fifty, assuming that Kian had that much cronies.

Yzak answered the question with a blank expression. "As far as hostages go, they're fine. Crying and shivering, but fine."

That made Athrun blink. "Cagalli was crying...?"

Yzak paused, tried to think of something, then shook his head. "Nope. She was as silent as a lamb. Strong girl."

Athrun stared into nothingness. "Yeah..."

Dearka turned to Kira, who was still writhing around pathetically. Whatever respect he could have salvaged for the brown-haired Coordinator was no sooner flying out the window. He snarled at him. "Get up! There is no time to waste. Get up!"

Kira shook his head, not even bothering to look up to him. "I can't protect Lacus. I'm a failure..."

Dearka watched Yzak grab Kira by the collar and dragged him to a standing position, then he propped him against the wall and made sure he's stay there. "Listen to me, you pathetic, spineless fish! They are out there right now, caught in the hatred of people who don't know any better, because they insisted on looking for _you_! Lacus is out there because of you!"

Kira turned away. "Because of me... she's in danger. I should die."

And the last straw finally snapped in Dearka. With a roar, he shoved Yzak away, and he himself grabbed Kira by his collar and shook him violently. "You wanna die so badly, Yamato!? You wanna die?! Well, I'll tell you this. You can't die! Not yet! Live people can change things. Dead people can't. Fllay died, according to you, because you were careless. Well, Lacus is out there now. A girl who cares for you no matter how screwed up you are. She's out there right now, in danger. And she's probably waiting for you to save her. Get your act together and grow a spine!" It took all his self-control not to box Kira's ears, and the light entering the Freedom pilot's eyes seem to make it easier. He let go of his collar and surprisingly, Kira stood straight, not slumping on the wall anymore. He still looked pretty out of it, though.

Athrun proceeded to the refrigerator and sighed. "That's enough, Dearka. Let Kira breath for a while. Here, Kira. I'll get you a glass of water." He opened the fridge door and, suddenly, Yzak and Dearka let out a scream as something pink and round shot out of the chiller like a bullet.

It was Mr. Pink!

_Mr. Pink? How the heck did it get in there?_

The metal Haro was a pink blur in the air as it zoomed around the room screaming, "_Kiraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!_" with its annoying electronic voice. Dearka let out a yelp as it swished over his head, missing him by inches. He watched Yzak duck as the Haro zoomed its way, missing the Duel pilot's ear by a fraction of a centimeter. Athrun's jaw dropped at the sight of the very aggressive invention of his and watched in horror as Mr. Pink violently barreled its way towards the still shocked Kira, unceremoniously ramming itself into the Freedom pilot's stomach, causing him to fall forward with a gasp.

Dearka eyed the brown-haired boy with pity, shaking his head and clicking his tongue over his palate as he watched Kira struggle to his feet, the pink menace cupped comfortably in his hands.

"That thing almost cost me my ear," Yzak muttered as he glared at Kira and the Haro. "What the heck was it doing there?"

Kira was silent as he looked at Mr. Pink with eyes that were hidden behind his mop of brown hair. "Two days ago, Lacus left it here in my care to keep me company while she was still practicing with Athrun. It was so annoying I stuffed it in the chiller. It wouldn't shut up."

"You did that to Lacus' toy?" Yzak asked dryly. "She'll freak when she finds out."

Kira shook his head, still looking at the Haro that now said, "_Lacus! Kira! Lacus! Kira!_" over and over again in that shrill voice of his. "Lacus would never freak out on me like that... She... always did understand..."

Dearka let his eyes wander from the Haro, to Kira's hidden face, then sighed. "Kira, let's go. Lacus and the others are waiting for us. This is your chance to protect the people that matter to you most. Let's do this right this time."

Yzak snorted. "Like there would be a right way to beat the crap out of school bullies."

Dearka crunched his knuckles hard, a sneer curling his lips, ignoring the pain in his side. "The right way is the most painful way possible." _They had better not touch Miriallia..._

Kira turned to them and slowly shook his head. "I'm sorry... I was such a pain in the neck..."

Yzak stared at him for a long time, then wordlessly walked out the room, not even waiting for them to follow.

Athrun nodded. "Yeah. You were a pain in the neck all right. We were looking for you for five damn hours."

"Sorry."

"I'll think about it." The Justice pilot started putting on his shoes.

Kira stared at Dearka. "Don't you have anything to say to me? Maybe a punch or two?"

Dearka blinked, then shook his head tiredly. Man, his ribs were killing him. "You are one lucky fool, Kira Yamato. Take care of Lacus. It's not everyday you get to find someone who'd be willing to love every single imperfection in you."

Kira smiled his small smile and let the pink Haro hover by his shoulder. "I'll remember that. Given she'll still have me after this."

"Let's just hope you're _that _lucky, and she's _that _nice." Dearka said as he tried to smile back at him. He didn't feel like smiling, though.

"And Dearka?" Kira asked.

"Yeah?"

"Milly is lucky to have you."

Dearka paused, then laughed bitterly. "Shows how much you know."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Miriallia sighed as she stretched her legs comfortably in front of her, or at least as comfortable as one could ever get, with your wrists bound behind you. Her eyes were starting to adjust in the darkness and she could see Cagalli trying another futile attempt at her ropes. Lacus was there by the corner, sitting next to Kari. Both were silent, unmoving. Probably trying to conserve energy. It was a good thing that the room they were in was small and there weren't any windows. In these wet clothes, they would have frozen to death, had there been any wind.

Trying to amuse herself, she started to fiddle with her own ropes as her thoughts wandered off randomly. Well, not that they got anywhere interesting. That room provided no inspiration at all. She turned to Cagalli. "Have you gotten it loose?"

The princess shook her head weakly. "It's too tight."

"Want me to have a shot at it?"

"I would have asked you sooner, but it's really very tight."

"Oh." And so Miriallia sighed again and continued to fiddle with her own ropes. After a while of trying her best to unknot it, she got frustrated, so she stopped and turned to Lacus instead. "Are you feeling all right, Lacus?"

"Yes," she said. She was obviously lying. "You?"

Miriallia opened her mouth to say something, about to say that she was fine, but she immediately shook her head and told the truth. "I'm worried about Dearka." Thoughts of the tan boy sprawled on the ground and being hit by a baseball bat at the sides flashed before her mind's eye. She shuddered at the memory.

"I hope he's all right, Milly. That was one strong swing that boy did with the bat."

With this, Kari broke in. "He didn't fight back, did he? Because you were threatened with a knife."

Miriallia stared at her in the dark. Who was this girl, really? She squinted at her from her place on the floor and asked, "Kari? Why did your brother cut your hair?"

She heard Cagalli stop fidgeting, as if she also wanted to know the answer.

Kari paused for a while, then spoke. "Many had admired my hair. He probably assumed that without it, I would be unhappy. I guess he did it to spite me. It really is not a big deal. It matters little to me, anyhow."

Miriallia felt a great degree of sadness for her. Her hair... it was so beautiful to look at... All of it gone... "I really did love your hair."

"Thank you, but I paid little attention to it, really."

"I bet Yzak loved your hair, too."

With that, Kari laughed. "Yzak saw nothing in me but a nuisance and a spy. He never so much as looked at me twice. Why should my hair matter to him at all?"

Miriallia didn't know what to say. She, too, had never really been that close to the Duel pilot himself. The closest she had ever been to him was in Tento Land, when he had pretended to kiss her to annoy Dearka. Not really knowing how to make her feel better, she decided to shut up. She hoped to God the boys would hurry and get them. She turned and watched Lacus from the corner of her eye and suddenly felt awfully unsure if she really did want them to come at all.

_Because I'm not sure if Kira will come with them, and Lacus will be heartbroken again._

She was about to address the songstress, when suddenly the door noisily screeched open.

The four girls jumped in unison.

The light from outside the room made Miriallia blink her eyes at the silhouette of the man that entered their room. The door closed noisily behind him, and once again, they were engulfed in absolute darkness. Only this time, she felt like she was trapped in a room with a grizzly bear. She felt suddenly utterly vulnerable. One of those goons was in there in the dark with them!

She gasped when the room suddenly erupted with dim, yellow light, causing white dots to swim around in front of her eyes.

After a couple of seconds, she felt brave enough to look at the newcomer.

She saw Cagalli jump to her feet at the sight of the man. "You!"

Miriallia did not know who the guy was, but there was only one thing she could say about him; he had such perfect teeth, and had it not been for Cagalli's reaction, she would not have expected him to be one among Kian's gang. He had dark hair neatly trimmed over his collar, and a relatively kind face that was actually pleasant to look at, in an unbiased opinion.

Kari stared at the boy warily. "Yalin Faraon. What brings you here?" Miriallia admired her calmness. She was on pins and needles right at that moment.

_God, Dearka. Save me..._

The Yalin person stared at her with gray eyes that seem to hold no emotion at all. "Are you four all right here?"

Cagalli went ballistic. "Like you would care, right?"

The boy shook his head, chuckling richly. "I remember you. You kicked me in the ribs a few times in the soccer field. Hurt like hell." Milly watched the guy's eyes travel to her, then, not even stopping for a few seconds, stopped dead on Lacus. "Are you all right? You look like you're in pain."

Lacus shrank away. "I'm all right."

"Liar. I noticed when you were first brought in that your wrist was a bit swollen. Are you sure you're all right?" He moved to Lacus' side.

Cagalli tried to swing her foot at him. But Yalin, having the advantage of both hands free, caught her foot, and Cagalli clumsily fell on her butt. "Please. You'll hurt yourself that way."

"Go to hell!" Cagalli snapped. "And stay away from Lacus."

Yalin smiled as he gazed down at the songstress. Miriallia felt the hair at the back of her neck stand up. "So your name is Lacus. Hello."

Lacus narrowed her eyes at him suspiciously. "I don't mean to be rude, but what do you want from me?"

Miriallia swallowed hard. What does he want?

Yalin turned to Kari. "Are you hurt?"

Kari shook her head. "You're here to help us. If so, make it quick. These ropes are too tight."

Yalin nodded, and reached out for Lacus, who at first tried to resist, but Yalin was quicker, and he succeeded in grabbing Lacus by the shoulders and he threw her over his knee, holding her down with his elbow. In a matter of seconds, she was free. With a pale face, she scuttled to the far wall, pressing her back to it, frightened. Yalin stared at her. "Be quiet. They'll hear you."

Kari motioned to her own wrist. "Untie me."

Yalin did so.

Miriallia writhed a bit when she watched the boy take her ropes off. She faced him the moment she was free, massaging her wrists gently. "Why are you helping us?"

Yalin stared at her briefly. He really did have a nice smile. "Does it matter? I'm helping you. Be happy with that."

She did not trust this guy. "It matters to me. I would like to know what you'd be getting out of this."

The gray-eyes boy sighed in resignation as he tried to help Cagalli out. "The satisfaction that I will not see girls getting hurt in a blind cause Kian is driving us with."

Cagalli jumped back from him the moment she was free. The princess looked like she was going to pounce any minute. "So you're going to be a traitor, too?"

Yalin shook his head. "I don't even know why I have to explain this to you, but I think Kian has gone far enough." He stood up and approached Lacus, taking her already swollen wrist in his hand. Miriallia wanted to swat it away from her friend. "I've had relatives in Orb that died with Kian's parents, and I've always thought that Coordinators really are bloodthirsty beasts of war..." he looked at Lacus with those eyes and smiled. "But you're a Coordinator, and you're nothing like what they say..."

Lacus was scandalized. She pulled her hand away and winced at the pain she caused herself. "Please, Mr. Faraon. Touch me again, and I will be very displeased with you."

Yalin decided to ignore her. He took her hand again and examined her wrist. "Nothing seems to be broken, but I think you twisted it a bit." He was about to reach in his pocket for something when Lacus suddenly raised her good hand to her side and slapped the boy smack on the face. Yalin staggered a few steps away.

Cagalli smirked.

Kari looked like she was having fun watching Lacus and Yalin.

Miriallia, however, was not amused. This Yalin was making the moves on Lacus! She hurried to the songstress' side and protectively wrapped an arm around her shoulder. "Keep away from her."

Yalin raised both hands in the air, as if to surrender. Then Kari approached him from behind. "Why are you here, then?"

The handsome boy slipped his hands into his pocket and shrugged. "Kian is being the bloodthirsty war beast that he claims Coordinators are. This is the first time I've been this close to a Coordinator, and you and the others are nothing like I thought you would be. In fact, you don't even seem any different from us... So technically, I find this kidnapping-and-threatening really childish. And tiring." He yawned. "I could be sleeping at home, warm in my bed, but instead, I'm here." He flashed a sweet smile at Lacus.

The songstress looked away.

Cagalli crossed her arms across her chest, tapping her foot on the ground. "And I suppose you can get us out of here coz you're a one-man army, right?"

Yalin liked that. He chuckled. "As much as I want to think of me as that cool and strong, I can't." He gazed at Lacus again. Miriallia wished he'd stop. "I'm no Coordinator after all."

"So we have no use for you after all?" the princess said dryly.

Miriallia looked from the door, to Yalin. What was he thinking, anyway?

Yalin shrugged. "I'm here to check in on you if you're all well enough to run."

Miriallia frowned. "_Run?_"

"Predictably, Kian doesn't have a concrete plan about this. He just wants to hold you girls as hostages while they beat the crap out of your boys, and they won't be able to fight, because you're there. There are approximately fifty men out there to do that job. Me along with three others will be watching over you, holding a blade across your throat, so your men won't be able to fight back. It's a cowardly thing, and plainly not a creative one, too. But it's always worked for Kian's not-so-creative mind. Mind you, he's sent thirteen boys he suspected as Coordinators to the hospital. Three of which couldn't walk anymore. And thanks to Kari here, he knows that those four really _are _Coordinators, so I can't promise how harsh they're gonna be. That's where I come in. If I make sure you get away, we'll let your boys finish off the job with Kian and his crew."

Cagalli still looked like she did not trust him. "And what do you get from all this?"

Yalin grinned his boyish grin. "I already told you. A clean conscience. And hopefully, Lacus' trust."

Miriallia grimaced. Ugh! What a smooth talker!

Lacus shrank back even more.

Yalin turned to Kari. "I'll have to tie you up again until your friends arrive. I'll make sure you can get out of them this time without my help."

Kari nodded. "Sounds like a plan." She stared at Yalin for the longest possible time and smiled. "What will happen to you after this?"

He shrugged again. He seems to like to shrug a lot. "Probably nothing. Either that or Kian will hunt me down and make sure to put my teeth in a bag."

The redheaded girl nodded satisfactorily. "Sounds good enough to me. You have too beautiful teeth, anyway."

Yalin chuckled.

Cagalli thought about it for a moment. "It sounds simple enough. And we don't have any other choice, do we?"

Lacus nodded slowly, still trying to avoid Yalin's penetrating gaze.

Miriallia furrowed her brow and nibbled her lower lip in thought. After a moment she nodded. So long as Dearka will not have to get beaten up again because of her. "All right." She turned around and put her wrists together. "Tie me up."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Yzak made his way across the hard downpour as if in a trance, letting the water cascade down his face freely, knowing it was cold, but not really feeling it. His right hand was in his pocket, caressing a handful of smooth, silky hair, twining it through his fingers unconsciously. He could not stop thinking about her... He did not want to believe it was true, that she had been spying on him. He had even tried rationalizing everything with himself.

_Kian called Kari a traitor. That must mean she's done something for my favor, right? After all, she was trying to tell me something. It's my fault that I didn't listen... _

He shook his head, trying to rid himself of the unfamiliar emotions he was feeling. Maybe he shouldn't have come to Earth all along... It was causing more emotional distress for him. If he had just gone home to PLANT, everything would have been easier...

_"Aw, don't tell me you're starting to fall for him, sister dear! And for some weird reason, I have a feeling he could actually have liked you, too... **If you hadn't stabbed him in the back!** Well, I guess guys really do search for loyalty, along with just a pretty face..."_

Kian's hateful words rang though his numb brain, making him wince. Kari had feelings for him? No. That couldn't be. No one could care for a rock like him. Only his mother loved him. And an ice princess like Karina Takano was not anyone who'd be capable of feeling such a strong emotion.

_She was never interested in me to begin with. All that she needed was a subject for her stupid thesis..._

A hand on his shoulder made him jump. He looked to his right and found Kira looking at him weirdly. "Are you all right?"

The Freedom pilot's long brown hair matted his face and his lavender eyes looked troubled as well. Yzak shrugged his hand off. "In some utterly perverse dimension, Yamato, I'd probably be asking you to give me a hug and ask you to tell me that everything will be all right."

Kira smiled ruefully. "That would be nice, Yzak. Really gross, and highly uncomfortable, but I guess in a perverse dimension, it would be nice."

Yzak slumped his shoulders and looked at him in the corner of his eye. Not the expected reaction there. "I'm sorry for having forced you into using the MemS. I thought that it would have helped you much."

It was Kira's turn to shrug, but didn't say anything.

The Duel pilot sighed and looked up at the dark sky. They had been walking for almost an hour, following the directions they had found in the road map they unearthed in Kira's brochures when he was looking for beached for Lacus. Given that it was two in the morning, there weren't any buses running at that time, so they had to walk... damn...

Not that it mattered to Yzak. They did say before the sun rises, and the sun wouldn't be rising in another four hours. He watched Dearka and Athrun stalk their way across the rain a few feet in front of them with no signs of exhaustion. He turned to Kira. "What did you see in there?"

Kira blinked in astonishment then shook his head. "Nothing new. I've always thought of Fllay as never being able to forgive me for what I did."

"What did you do that needed forgiveness?"

Kira paused, then continued. "I failed in saving her father."

Yzak frowned. "But you _did _try, didn't you?"

"But I failed."

"And so your efforts meant nothing to her at all?"

That silenced Kira. "It doesn't matter if I tried. The results are what's important, right?"

Yzak sneered. "Fool. I pity you. You sound just like me."

Kira smiled. "I'll take that as a joke."

"I'm dead serious."

"Oh."

And they were silent.

The conversation really didn't look that promising, and so Yzak kept it dead. Bad idea, though. Now he was meant to suffer more thoughts about that now-shoulder length reddish-blond hair, and those one-way mirrors, those emerald green eyes.

He remembered having her touching his scar lightly, and him pulling back. The memory was shortly followed by the time when she laced her delicate fingers through his rough, callused ones, telling him of the story of the 'clasping of hands'. And hadn't he pondered on that thought for hours that same night?

The clasping of hands meant that a person could find another to fill in the imperfections one had in his life. That your partner filled in the gaps your good traits can't fill, and thus creating harmony.

He stared at his own hand, wriggling his fingers slowly, letting the rain wash over his palm and through his fingers. _Kari and I can never compliment each other. I should stop thinking about her this way. _

But his mind would not let him. And what's worse is that he had no one to blame but himself. He had let his guard down, and as much as he tried to be rude to her to drive her away, she seemed to have pursued him even harder. He smirked bitterly. _Well, you know why she pursued you that badly, Yzak Jule. She was a friggin' SPY! May that fact provide enough comedy for my sad and miserable life... I've been had by a Natural._

Now he did not know what face he'd be showing to his mother, the woman who had taught him to be tough and hide his emotions to keep it from being used against him. He really had become soft...

But things were going to be better now. After this escapade, he was going back to PLANT. And things will be a lot simpler then. No more moronic roommates. No more Cagalli and Athrun being sickeningly sweet to each other. No more Dearka trying to catch Milly's heart. No more Kira and Lacus soap-opera-episodes. And no more Kari...

_No more Kari..._

He smiled. _Good riddance. _

But he immediately frowned after the thought lingered on his mind. No more Karina Takano...

_No more..._

And he found himself sinking in a depression that had everything to do with the fleeting phantom. And had it not been for Dearka's announcement that they were nearing the bend that led up to Notoro Cape, he would have sunk even deeper.

Yzak's head shot up, and he shoved every thought about Kari to a small corner of his brain. It had been one hell of a walk leading up to the cape, with a lot of winding roads through trees so tall it made everything look drearier than it usually should. Not that it mattered. Yzak's eyes could easily adjust in the darkness. Ahead, they could see what looked like a gray, dome-shaped building sitting in the middle of a broad expanse of dead grass and mud. The hairs at the back of his head started to prickle up again as he felt that odd sensation of being watched.

He knew they were surrounded.

Kira's eyes warily stared straight ahead, but Yzak knew that the Freedom pilot felt it, too. As did Dearka and Athrun. Both Coordinators carried themselves quite lightly, arms dangling loosely to their sides, except for Dearka's one hand that rested on his ribs. Yzak grimaced. He did not look fine at all. But that was the least of their concerns right now.

The Duel pilot let his eyes dart left, then right as he examined the battlefield they were entering. He watched every bush, every tree, that could be a potential hiding place for any of them goons who might even be thinking of pouncing on them while they weren't looking. Yeah, they were there. Nothing much to say about their futile attempt at stealth, though. He shook his head. This was going to be amusing.

Or at least, he thought it was...

He felt his teeth grinding in his mouth as he saw what was waiting for them.

There, right at the opening of the dome, arms tied behind their backs and held at bay with knifes on their necks by four guys that Yzak did not recognize except for that Yalin person, were the four girls...

His heart leapt at the sight of Kari staring at the ground, keeping her head down as the rain poured down on her, causing her now-short hair to appear darker. He had almost forgot she was wearing nothing but jeans and a red shirt, whereas Cagalli, Milly and Lacus were wearing slickers. She held her ground, though, and she looked like she was oblivious of the water beating down on her. Somehow, her serenity made him feel proud of her. Which was silly. Because it used to annoy the heck out of him.

_Well, at least she did not whine and cry around like a girly girl. _

He cringed inwardly. God! One would think he really did care!

Which he didn't...

Did he?

No time to answer that. He saw Kian appear from inside the dome, followed by about half a dozen of his lackeys. He still had that smirk that Yzak had soooo wanted to wipe off his face, only he wanted to wipe the rest of his face off with it. He was carrying that metal bat with his good arm while the other rested in a white cast. The Duel pilot smiled sardonically to himself. He knew Kian got that from that time when he whipped him against a tree. He felt his hands itch at the sudden desire to do it again...

Yzak saw Miriallia raise her face when they were finally near enough for her ears to pick up. She looked completely lost for a moment, but when her eyes landed on the Buster pilot, her face was torn between crying and laughing out loud. "Dearka!"

"Did you miss me?" The Buster pilot said jokingly, which did not sound like a joke at all, what with his serious face and deadly stare he normally reserved for people he was about to kill.

Kira stopped dead in the middle of the clearing, and out popped Mr. Pink from the breast pocket of his coat. It hovered over him for a bit before silently zooming off to Lacus, who did not know if she should acknowledge the presence of the boy who just knocked her away because of a living memory of a dead girl. He watched the songstress gasp at the sight of the Haro, then when she saw Kira looking at her, she turned away, hiding her blue eyes under a curtain of pink hair.

Cagalli smiled at the sight of her man. Athrun did not look at her, though. He was busy looking at Kian, who was now making his way across the field towards them.

As they approached, he felt a warm sensation starting from his head, making it's way to his chest. He had never felt this before... But then again, he had never really been this emotionally driven in a fight before. Right now, he was going to engage in a battle not because he had orders to follow, but because of a personal reason that he seldom found as a good enough motivation. He felt his hands clench into fists as the warm sensation spread through his mind, and he closed his eyes, trying to savor the only warmth that he's felt for the past six or so hours.

It was a wonderful feeling, that warmth. And as he closed his eyes, his senses were filled not by darkness, but by a sparkling light...

And he could envision in his mind's eye a small seed...

Sitting there in the middle of the void...

And as he opened his eyes, he saw and felt that seed burst into a multitude of radiant lights and colors, and suddenly, he felt stronger...

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

He had felt that sensation before, many times in battle, while piloting his Freedom Gundam. He knew the feeling of that sudden burst of energy, fueling his veins with unusual speed, strength, stamina, sharpening his reflexes... The warmth he felt along with this was welcoming, and as he looked at Yzak, who was standing at his right, his usually blue eyes somehow eerily misty and flat, he knew the Duel pilot had gone into Berserker mode.

He looked to his left, and discovered Athrun, his feet planted firmly on the ground, ready to pounce at the readily approaching Kian, had also submitted himself to the fleeting power, as his dark-blue eyes also contained that light that made one appear as if in a trance. And right next to him, he saw Dearka's startled face as he closed his eyes. Kira blinked in surprise as he saw the Buster pilot's normally dark purple eyes open, revealing icy cold orbs, which looked deadly in contrast to his very dark complexion.

_We're all in... Berserker mode..._

Kian stopped not a hundred feet from where they stood, the six underlings of his forming a semi-circle behind him. They were holding nothing that looked like a weapon, but he knew they were planning something; cowards always do.

Yzak spoke first, sounding really bored. "Now what?" he drawled.

Kian stared at them suspiciously, as if somehow realizing that there was something different but couldn't quite put his finger into it. He swung the bat over his shoulder as scowled. He did not say anything.

To be honest, Kira could not see the objective of this situation. Along the way, he'd been asking himself what Kian could possibly want with them, but no answer came. That was because he really did not believe Kian had a good enough reason to hate them this much. But then again, bullies never really did need a good enough reason to pick on anyone. They just do.

But this was going too far...

Hate... that was it. Kian hated Coordinators. Somehow, Kira felt sad at the fact that as much as they were trying to build bridges, Kian kept on building walls...

He stared at Lacus. From where he stood, he could not see her face. But he could tell, she was sad... and if not sad, she was definitely did not look happy... He hated himself for her grief. She cried because of him, and she did not deserve to cry. She should always be happy... But because he was a coward, he didn't even want to risk trying again, because he was afraid to fail... What if he promised Lacus he'd make her happy, and then end up breaking the promise? He would always fail... because that's what he was... a failure...

_If I don't try to let it go, I'm no better than Kian and his gang... _

Kira blinked his eyes as he heard Yzak's words echo through his mind. His past was holding him down, and he was dragging everyone down with him. What a loser he was.

"_And so your efforts meant nothing to her at all?" _Again, Yzak's words.

Kira sucked in sharply and exhaled slowly. _To Lacus, results don't matter as much... If I try, then that would be more than enough for her..._

He looked up and stared at Kian menacingly. "How dare you take them like this."

Kian stared back. "What're you gonna do about it, Coordinator? Kill us? Like you killed my father?"

Dearka, by then, was really annoyed. He didn't raise his voice, though. "You don't even know what the hell you're talking about. I bet you didn't even know what really happened out there in the war!."

Kian roared, "_SHUT UP!_"

And the guy holding Miriallia – a spiky, green-haired boy - grabbed the girl's hair roughly and pulled back, causing her to cry out in pain.

"Don't touch her!" Dearka screamed, running forward a few steps before finally catching himself. He skidded to a stop, clutching his side, when he saw Green-Hair press the blade closer to her slender neck.

Kira didn't know if he felt sorry for the red-haired bully, for the death of his father. And it was then did he really realize how pathetic it was to keep on letting your past rule you.

It would always be your choice to continue the cycle of hate... and Kian chose to continue it...

Kian shrugged his shoulders irritably. "Why are you here? Why don't you go back to where you belong? You don't belong here in a world full of normal people. We don't need your kind here! We don't need _murderers _walking around with us, pretending that everything is forgiven and forgotten!"

Now in reality, Kira did not want to go all out in explaining the truth of what really started the war, as he totally understood that people in Hokkaido were pretty much kept in the dark about everything. And even if they did have relatives in Orb, he could still not picture them telling that the Naturals were really the ones who started everything.

_They would grow up to the delusion that everything was entirely the other side's fault..._

And with that, Kira actually began to wonder if PLANT was experiencing the same dilemma they were experiencing now.

Probably, but that really wasn't anything he should be thinking now.

Kian turned to the four girls. "Of course, you see what's happening here, right?"

Of course. Any coward's plan. They'll threaten to hurt the girls if they fought back. Unoriginal, yes... But right now, it seemed to put them on the hot seat. So what to do now?

Kira gritted his teeth, completely lost.

_Now what? Heck, we came here with no concrete plan. And if they start the beating, will they let go of the girls after that?_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Lacus gasped in shock at the sight of the four boys' eyes as they made their way through the rain, determined looks on pretty much stone-cold faces. They must have walked all the way to them... All of them looked different...

She eyed each of them, one by one. Dearka looked a little pale and he was holding his side quite painfully. Nonetheless, his face gave away nothing. He was looking from Miriallia to Kian. Lacus knew what he was thinking: _If I smash his face into tiny pieces, will that boy really hurt her? _

Athrun paid no heed to Cagalli, though. Lacus knew Athrun. He would avoid whatever distraction there was, until everything's sure to be okay. The Justice pilot, she knew, was weighing everything down, before finally acting upon it.

Yzak, was silent and unmoving. He was just standing there, eyes cast to the ground, once in a while gazing at them (at Kari, who didn't even bother to raise her head at their arrival), one hand in his pocket. His expression, as usual, was unreadable.

And Kira...

_Kira..._

The songstress pried her eyes away when she saw him looking at her. She did not want to think he was there because of her. Because that would make her assuming. And she didn't want to assume anything from Kira anymore. She did not want to expect that Kira was there to save her... because she knew that the Freedom pilot did not have a place in his heart for her, for it was full of guilt and grief from the past...

And it felt like a hundred thousand burning needles simultaneously puncturing her heart.

She looked down as she watched Mr. Pink bury itself inside her slicker pocket, and she sighed. She had been wondering where he had been... She gasped when she felt the blade Yalin was holding against her leave her neck and she looked up. Yalin grimly looked down at her, those eyes searching hers. He bent down, pretending to fix his hold on her, but in reality, whispered in her ear. "When Kian swings his bat, those six he's with will do all the dirty work. Trust me, you don't want to know what's going to happen. Twenty men are watching the path down Notoro Misaki, ten from the left, and ten from the right. The gang's van is located behind this shelter. I can take the four of you there and drive you out to the highway."

Lacus stared at him incredulously, then whispered back. "I'm not leaving them behind."

"What?! You can't stay here! It's too dangerous!"

"I'm not leaving them here, Yalin. Just as long as we get out of harm's way, Kira and the rest can move freely then. But if we're not leaving together, we're not leaving at all. I will not leave Kira."

Now it was Yalin's turn to stare at her. ""Kira... who is he?"

Lacus was speechless. _Yeah, Lacus. Who is he? _She shook her head. "I find no reason for me to answer that question."

The guy holding Cagalli – a guy with messy blonde hair – turned to Yalin. "What the heck are you doing to the hostage?"

Yalin straightened up. "None of your damn business."

Lacus swallowed hard as her eyes met Cagalli's. The princess nodded, as if knowing what she planned to do. Lacus nodded back, and stared straight ahead.

_When Kian swings his bat... When Kian swings his bat... _

Miriallia and Kari gazed at her. She nodded, and they nodded back.

_When Kian swings his bat... When Kian swings his bat..._

Lacus positioned her hands to pull the rope, then she coiled all her strength in her knees, ready to bolt into a dead run once she was free. It was easier for her, because Yalin was the one holding her. But she knew the good-looking boy wouldn't let anything happen to Cagalli and the rest.

She watched Kian and the six men advance and press closer to the four Coordinators. The boys were warily eyeing the six and Kian, then would shift their gaze to them.

And suddenly, Lacus felt everything happen in slow motion, when she finally saw Kian raise his bat over his head, a deranged, almost wild look on his face, and swiftly brought it down in a cutting motion through the air.

_NOW!_

Lacus let out a yell as Yalin roared, sending his elbow flying to the blonde boy holding Cagalli, and the princess of Orb was out of her binding ropes in a second. Lacus scuttled a few feet forward as she noticed Miriallia knee the green-haired boy, who appeared to have been startled by Yalin's unexpected attack, between the legs. The boy groaned loudly, and dropped the knife he was holding in the floor. Miriallia was torn between picking it up, or knocking it away. The latter won, and so she sent the blade ricocheting with a swift kick.

Cagalli was as savage as ever. Very, very mad at having been tied up like that for two hours or so, she lashed out with her fists at the boy holding her captive and everything went wild!

Lacus ran forward, grabbing an abandoned bat on the ground with her good hand. (Man, her twisted wrist was killing her!) She weighed the weapon in her hands for a second and, deciding it was good enough to hold anyone who attempted to grab her at bay, she turned to Kira and the rest.

The boys seemed to have caught up. Seeing that the girls were free, it seemed like they took the liberty in one by one taking them on. She saw the twenty odd men Yalin was referring to emerge from the trees, ready to join in the fun. Lacus laughed wildly as she watched them in action. Had it not been for her enhanced eyesight, she knew she would not have been able to see what was going on. Everything happened so fast!

She saw Dearka zoom through the accumulating bodies on the ground as he still held his side painfully, knocking still more men down with a few punches and kicks. Wow! The Buster pilot was fighting these goons with one hand! She did not have time to admire his skills in close combat, because her attention was caught by Athrun as the Justice pilot leaped up in the air, sending a series of kicks to the three or so boys who tried to tackle him from all sides. Lacus jumped up and down, really enjoying herself. She laughed in the rain as once again lightning flashed through the skies, followed by rumbling thunder. She turned around and found Kari standing next to her, holding also another bat. She smiled at her and she smiled back. After that, Kari wandered away from her, sneaking off in the middle of the ruckus. Lacus wondered where she was going.

But they were not out of the loop yet. Lacus yelped as she saw a boy wielding a blade in one hand barrel towards her, hoping to regain control of the situation. Lacus raised her bat over her head, feeling kind of eager in a way to whack a goon or two, but her action was suddenly halted by someone grabbing the boy from behind and whipping him several feet in the air. Lacus watched the boy's flight and crash with utmost amusement. And when she looked down to see who it was that ruined her fun, she felt her knees give wobble at what she saw.

"Hi," Kira said, shyly scratching his mop of too-long hair. The light in his eyes was slowly disappearing as he stood there, eyeing her uncertainly.

Lacus blinked back the water in her eyes and fiddled with the bat she was holding. She did not know what to say... In the corner of her eye, she saw Athrun and Dearka still finishing up the job by one by one eliminating the threats somewhere behind Kira. And in the background, she could hear Cagalli cursing profusely as she continued to obviously pound to the ground whatever poor soul she had gotten her hands into. They were winning... and she loved every bit of it... but now that Kira was here, standing right in front of her, she didn't know what to say.

Kira blinked at her. "Lacus... I'm sorry..."

Lacus opened her mouth, but even before she could speak, someone just suddenly materialized beside her and touched her shoulder. She jumped as she found Yalin looking at her, concerned. "Are you all right?"

The songstress blinked at him, confused. "Yalin...?" she looked from Kira to the boy and then back again. Kira looked at her, confused, those lavender eyes pleading with her.

_I will never expect him to return my feelings... I will only get hurt more..._

Without thinking, she looked away, and let out a gasp, pretending to have seen something she had to do. Which was really lame, because they were in the middle of a muddy clearing, and looking for something to do there was really stupid. "I... have to go." And she hurried away, her eyes cast down, dropping the bat on the floor.

Looking over her shoulder, she saw both boys look after her, then, in a blink of an eye, they were glaring at each other.

She groaned inwardly. _Things just keep getting better and better... _She thought bitterly.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Yzak really did not waste his time trying to beat into submission the small fry. Instead, he wove his way through Kira, Dearka and Athrun as they easily fought their way through the pressing wave of bullies. He knew that if you want to win a chess game, you go for the king. And who else could be the king of these fools?

He snickered happily to himself when he spotted the little worm, panicking in the corner for having his usually primitive plan backfire on him. Yzak had seen it happen. The one holding Lacus had turned on Kian and helped the girls escape. He really did not know what they could have done, had this not happened. But it seemed like luck was on their side, and Kian was about to meet his tragic end in the hands of Yzak Jule.

But of course, he was speaking quite figuratively. He would not kill the bastard, although he deserved it. But sure, he felt like he owed the jerk a few kicks and punches in the gut. He was no fight at all, what with his cast and thus one good hand less. Yzak settled in twisting his good arm behind him, making him drop his bat. The Duel pilot's plan, actually, was to hold Kian hostage for his men to stop, but when he turned around with a wildly protesting red-haired bully, he found out that he did not need to, which left him feeling pretty stupid. He had let Kira and the rest have all the fun, while he went after this jerk that he did not feel deserved going after anyway. The three mad Coordinators had wiped out fifty or so men in five minutes!

_Heck! So that was what they needed. Get their girlfriends in trouble and they'll blindly break their way through the front lines to save them. Hehe!_

Yzak turned to Kian in disgust. "Now what do I have to do with you?"

Kian snapped at him crazily, trying to get free. "Don't pretend like you don't know! Kill me now!"

Yzak glared down at him so menacingly that the boy actually shrank back. "You don't know how much my hands _itch _with the desire to break you neck, right after what you did to the girls." He sniffed in disgust as he threw him to the muddy ground, making his skid and slip clumsily. "But I'm not like you, ass. In this situation, I keep on wondering who is the war freak here."

Kian stared at him with wide eyes, and then looked away, but he did not try to get up.

Yzak was about to walk away, when suddenly, he felt someone staring at him from behind. He turned around and felt his heart leap at the sight of her.

"Yzak," Kari said silently.

And the Duel pilot blinked in surprise when he left the rain's heavy downpour suddenly stop to a steady but weak drizzle. He looked up into the sky, stared at it for the longest possible time, then sighed. He jumped when he felt someone touch his cheek.

Damn! He did not even hear her approach him!

There was Kari, staring up at him with that unreadable expression on her face, her cold, cold hand on his cheek. And what surprised him was that he did not try to pull away. She shook her head sadly. "Forgive me. I did not respect your feelings."

Yzak looked away, but did not back off. He let her hand linger on his face. For some weird reason, he wanted to remember that touch. He has never been touched this way before... "Why did you do it?"

Kari let her hand fall, and Yzak wanted to snatch it back. She was so cold... "I was stupid."

The Duel pilot stared at her in the eye, this time, willing himself to hold that gaze. "What did that letter really say? What did my mother say to me?"

Kari giggled softly. "Beside the fast that you are one among the High Council of PLANT, she said that she is proud that you have learned how to ride a bike, and that she would love to hear you sing."

Yzak felt like he wanted the ground to break open and swallow him whole. He narrowed his eyes at her. "I hate you."

She smiled. "Do you really?"

Yzak opened his mouth to say yes, but found himself shaking his head. "Not really. What more did the letter say."

Kari blinked, hesitated a bit, then sighed. "She wants you home, Yzak. She wants you back in PLANT."

The Duel pilot really didn't find that as a surprise, though. He nodded. "Then I shall leave as soon as possible."

Kari tilted her head to the right. It annoyed Yzak, having her look at him like that. She was so pretty, with or without the long hair. The three silver studs in her ear lobes sparkled when she moved. "I see."

Yzak stared at her.

She stared at him.

Yzak got annoyed even more. "Is that the only thing you have to say? Aren't you going to thank me for saving you?"

The girl thought for a moment, then smiled. "I didn't ask you to save me, but if it's going to make you feel any better, thanks."

Yzak blinked, surprised to have her use his own words on him. Those were one of the few phrases they had said to each other then. He sighed. He did not see the purpose of staying mad at her forever, since he was probably never going to see her again. But he really could not get rid of the sadness nagging at his heartstrings at the fact...

"I forgive you."

And she smiled. She then looked down at her brother who looked like he had zoned out of reality. "I'll take care of things from here."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Cagalli madly sent her foot flying at the already unmoving body of the guy who had been holding her hostage earlier. The damn boy was holding her too tight, the jerk! She was about to gather her strength for yet another kick when she felt someone grab her by the shoulder.

_So you trying to sneak up on me, are you!?_

Without thinking, she grabbed the wrist of the brave but stupid guy who even dared to touch her while she wasn't looking, and threw him over her head with a loud "**_HAYIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAA!_**"

And the guy went crashing on the muddy ground with a loud "OW!"

And, at the sight of who the guy was, Cagalli screamed. "Athrun!"

The Justice pilot slowly pushed himself to a sitting position. "Nice to see you, too Cagalli."

The princess rushed to his side as the rain weakened, making her see her boyfriend better. He was groaning as he sat up. "Sorry. I thought you were someone else."

"Well at least I know you can fend for yourself, even if I'm not there."

Cagalli nodded proudly. "Yeah."

Athrun turned to her and smiled boyishly. "Did you miss me?"

Cagalli pretended to think. "Hmm. I have to think about that, first."

Athrun looked hurt.

She laughed. "Only as much as you missed me. Which I know is a lot." She helped him stand up and gazed around. "How's everyone?"

Athrun shook his head. "Around, I guess. Did you see where Kira went? Is he talking to Lacus?"

Cagalli shrugged, leaning her weight on Athrun's chest, feeling suddenly tired. "I hope so." She looked up at him. "Let's go home, Athrun. I'll give you a foot massage, if you massage my shoulders. They had to knock me unconscious just to bring me here."

"What?! They did what?"

Cagalli realized she said the wrong thing. "Uhm, nothing..."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Dearka staggered forward as he looked around, making sure that there wasn't anyone out there that would attack him while he looked for Miriallia. He was about to turn and start his search, when he saw someone from a distance zooming to him at an alarming speed, sending mud and grass flying everywhere.

_Miriallia!  
_

Dearka laughed as he waved, but immediately brought his arm down when a jolt of pain shot through his side. Dammit... he needed to get those checked out...

"You're all right!" Mirallia shouted as she threw herself to his waiting arms. He felt like the happiest guy with broken ribs in the entire world! Miriallia was safe and she was happy to see him! Oh, joy!

Mirallia pulled back and laughed happily. "I knew you'd come."

And with this, the Buster pilot blinked. He really was surprised to discover that she was this happy to see him. Could it be that she really did care? Could it be that she really was as happy to see him as he was to see her?

Dearka looked down at her, inspecting her face. He had memorized every mole and every crease. "Did they hurt you? What did they do to you?"

She shook her head. "I'm fine." Shyly, she looked up at him. "At least now, I am."

_She's all right because I'm here! What do I say? What do I say?_

Dearka swallowed hard. "Uh... okay..."

_Stupid! _

Miriallia frowned at him, then discarded the idea quickly. She turned around. "So you found Kira all along. What made him come?"

Dearka shrugged. "Lacus."

Miriallia nodded vigorously. "Good thing he did. That Yalin character is hovering around Lacus like an annoying fly."

"Who?"

Miriallia shook her head. "Nothing."

"Oh. I see." Dearka turned to examine their handy work. Not too bad, really, although he did not know what to do after that. He had planned to save Miriallia, but did not really plan this far ahead. He stared at her for a moment then over to the other side of the clearing, where he could see Yzak talking to Kari, Kian at their feet. Maybe they needed help with him. Now that everything's safe, he could leave Miriallia by herself right now.

He looked down at her briefly. "Just a minute, Miriallia. I think I'll go over and help Yzak with that Kian person." And without waiting for her consent, he slowly took a step towards the Duel pilot's direction. But even before he could take another step, he felt Miriallia grab his hand and yanked him back. What with his rib aching terribly, he fell back, almost missing a step, and ended up crashing against her body. "Whoa! Hey! What the - !"

But his protests were interrupted by Miriallia's lips suddenly covering his, muffling his words with the sweetest sensation he has ever felt in his entire existence. And although contrary to what other people say that they hear music and see angels dancing, Dearka saw nothing that resembled such.

But a first kiss under a gentle falling rain was better than any naked little winged babies dancing to some sappy music...

And the whole world could have fallen off its orbit then and there. He didn't care! Nothing could have stopped him from savoring that wonderful feeling of having her wrap her arms around him, making him fully aware that he was so cold and she was so cold but together they shared warmth. Nothing could have ruined that moment at all. Nothing could –

"Ow!" Dearka cried, pulling away, as Miriallia accidentally pressed hard against his side, sending another electric shock of pain through his entire body.

"Sorry!" she gasped, suddenly distancing herself from him. "Where does it hurt? Let me see?"

Dearka reminded himself to kick himself ninety-nine times later when they got home as he watched Miriallia fuss over his side.

_Count on me to ruin the most perfect moment of his life_.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_**To be continued!!!**_

**_Yuugiri: Well, there it is, the update. I know it looks a little lacking, but it was getting a little too long, and so I had to cut it there. I just introduced another character in the story to lay the foundation for Lacus and Kira's relationship... or something like that... --"Oh, well... I really don't feel that confident about it..._**

_**For those who really don't like fluff, sorry... I guess it just came out this way... **_

_**Well, leave a review foe me, and please no more flying squirrels... or cows... or durian... or tomatoes... (goes on and on and on...... )**_

__


	21. Phase 21: Don't Leave Please?

_**Yuugiri: Everyone, thank you for the reviews. I will not be commenting on the reviews, and once again let the story answer for itself. Please, I really do plan to take time with this story and not rush everything to a not so good ending, and so there will be a lot of time for them to grow into someone better, the whole lot of them. , **_

_**Know that I shall be considering everything that you suggest.**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed. Also, I don't know if Yzak really likes pickle relish on his sandwiches, or coffee crumble cakes. This also goes with his mother liking angel figurines. I made all of that up. **_

_**July 16, AW :: 4:30 pm**_

_July 16, Saturday_

_Dear Diary,_

_I'm alone in our dorm and Cathrun is sleeping soundly in my room. Lacus is out shopping with Milly. It's been two days since the incident in Notoro Misaki and it looks like things are finally going back to normal. _

_Mrs. Takano, however, was greatly disappointed with her son... Kari did everything she could and Kian's gang was sentenced to three months of community service, which makes me think what the heck will be happening to the community with fifty bullies running around to do jobs... Kian, that bastard, got off the hook, coz it turns out he really is mentally disturbed. He was taken to the rehabilitation clinic in Higashimokoto, a city an hour away from Abashiri. Good riddance. I wouldn't want to see him anytime soon. And I'm at least a bit happy because they let Yalin off completely, since we owe him that much. I just wish he'd stop hovering over Lacus... _

_I'm actually beginning to worry about that... my brother, the dolt, has been trying hard to catch Lacus' attention for the last couple of days, but it seems like she's not yet ready to face Kira. Which is perfectly all right with me. Kira deserves it, after how he's acted. I guess it's time he lived with his decisions in life and discover for himself the value of the people around him. He's been neglecting the importance of his friends... and Lacus. But this doesn't change the fact that I hate Yalin, and I think he should stop making the moves on Lacus. Just yesterday, I saw him giving her a box of what looked like chocolates right after Health Class. Kira had scowled at the boy, and tried to ask Lacus out for dinner, but she blandly declined, giving a feeble excuse of having to take care of Akira. And after that, she left. With Yalin's chocolates. Ugh!_

_And if you think things couldn't get any worse, it suddenly does. Yzak has made up his mind in leaving. I could not quite understand it myself, but I actually thought that he would change his mind, after he finally seemed to have made up with Kari. I definitely see a connection between them, however odd they looked together. In Notoro Misaki, when I saw Kari touch Yzak's cheek, I felt like I was staring at a lethargic bunny rabbit touching a fox's nose. But still... I don't know... It's like... they looked 'right' together..._

_But still Yzak persisted. So he's leaving this afternoon. Kazui and Sai don't know it yet. It appears that while we were looking for Kira two days ago, the director of Rainbow, that kiddie show they were working on, saw them and dragged them off to the studio, since they just took off without a say. We decided not to tell them anymore of the kidnappings, since we knew that once we did, they'll ask so many questions we wouldn't feel like answering anyway. And so as far as they're concerned, Lacus twisted her wrist because she slipped, and fell on Dearka, who in turn fell over and landed wrongly, hurting his ribs. At first, I thought that they wouldn't believe it because I knew that it was a lame excuse. Luckily, they ate it. So there. No one seemed to have bothered to inform them of Yzak's decision, and Yzak himself would not take the liberty to tell them himself. _

_What a terrible two days..._

_The only highlight of those two days was that it finally stopped raining yesterday, and Dearka and Miriallia had finally decided to define the line between them. It is actually pretty funny, watching them together. They look more awkward now than they used to, before their kiss. Sure, they'd hang out together, but Dearka seemed like he'd lose all communication skills, while Miriallia would just smile and cuddle him, which would cause him to lose all motor skills completely. Athrun told me that it's natural... since they're in love... I tried to tell him that – _

"I didn't know you keep a diary."

Cagalli hurriedly slammed her notebook shut as she looked up from the couch she was lying in on her stomach, and ended up staring straight into those dark-blue eyes that belonged to none other than Athrun Zala, bent over trying to peek at what she was writing. "Hey. I was about to write about you."

The Justice pilot smiled at her and kissed her on the tip of her nose before placing a conspicuous-looking plastic bag on the floor, then straightening and looking out the open window of the living room. "It's a lovely day out and you're here, indoors? That's not nice. And to think you've been up all night yesterday because of Yzak's surprise party. Shouldn't you be relaxing?"

Cagalli sat up, tucking the pen and thin notebook she used as a diary under the cushions of the couch. "There's nothing much to do out there anyway. I'm just trying to enjoy the silence. After Kian, I deserve it."

Athrun sat down on one end of the couch and gathered her feet, knuckling her soles gently. Cagalli wriggled her toes in pleasure. "I ran into Lacus and Milly in the supermarket."

"Yeah, they're getting something for the party. Wait a minute. You were in the supermarket? What for?"

Athrun smiled at her and reached into the plastic bag he had placed at the foot of the couch. "Got you something."

Cagalli felt her heart jump as the Justice pilot pulled out a pint of chocolate chip ice cream. "Aw! You got me ice cream!" And without pausing, she snatched it away, ripped the top open and grinned crookedly. "Thank you."

Athrun pulled out a spoon from the plastic bag, handed it to her and continued to massage her feet. "You're welcome."

The blond-haired princess dipped her spoon in the pint and scooped up a huge chunk of that chocolaty goodness. "I forgive you."

Athrun was puzzled. "What did I do?"

"I don't know, but you're giving me something for no reason at all, and that must mean you did something wrong."

"But I never - "

Cagalli shushed him by shoving the spoon into his mouth, muffling his protest with the cold, yummy treat. "Whatever it is, Athrun, I forgive you." And she withdrew her spoon and continued to gobble huge amounts of ice cream.

Now in reality, Cagalli knew that Athrun didn't do anything, but she just couldn't resist making him squirm. She turned to him and smiled as he shook his head at her. The blue-black haired boy absentmindedly traced lazy circles on the soles of her feet. "Yzak has finally finished packing."

Cagalli frowned. "He took two days to pack? One would think he's stalling. What would he be bringing back to PLANT anyways?"

"Books. And a lot of angel figurines."

"Angel figurines?"

"Said his mother has an assorted collection of little cute stuff. He actually snarled at me when I tried to press the issue."

"He's really leaving... I wish he'd change his mind. I feel like he should stay..." She kind of has gotten used to having the Duel pilot around, laughing at his misfortunes. It was always easy to get him annoyed. She didn't even know if the party was going to please him... "Oh, well, how is Kira? Have you seen him around?"

Athrun shrugged. "He's been awfully bothered by that Yalin guy." He frowned deeply. "I don't like that guy hanging around Lacus."

"Who does? He's creepy. His teeth are too perfect. So," the princess started, speaking in between mouthfuls of chocolate chip. "What brings you here, Mr. Zala?"

"Well, now that you've asked, Ms. Attha, I wanted to check up on you because Kisaka called the dorm room."

And with that, Cagalli's ears prickled up. Wait a minute. Why was Kisaka calling Athrun and not her? She did not like that. She was the princess of Orb! Kisaka was supposed to call _her_!

As if reading her thoughts, Athrun jumped in with an explanation that seemed to anger her even more than calm her down. "He wanted me to tell you, because he said you listen to me more than you listen to him. Anyway, it's important. And I know that you're a bit pissed, but just hear it out."

Cagalli thought about it, pondering on the possibility on what could be that important that Kisaka did not tell her personally. She stuffed another spoonful of ice cream in her mouth, then nodded.

"He told me that the forums in Orb are not promising, and it seems like the people there have been restless. I could understand their feelings, but Kisaka does not think things are going well."

The princess of Orb blinked. The wheels in her head started to turn as she felt that her country was calling for her. Now what used to be a neutral country was torn by hatred for Coordinators. And now she knew that while she lingered there in Abashiri, trying to live a 'normal' life, her people were exhausting theirs by holding a grudge. She turned to the Justice pilot seriously. "And the reconstructions? How are they?"

"That department is pretty much done. In six months, you can expect a full recovery in the industry. So far the society is the only thing we have to worry about. Some of your people seem to have grown a hatred for us Coordinators... "

"What are the odds?"

"Five out of ten people do not agree that Coordinators could be trusted enough to hold true to a Peace Treaty. Three out of the remaining five do not know what to think. And since Orb is playing an important role in planned Peace Treaty, he thinks it's important that the country stays neutral."

Cagalli cursed. Suddenly, the ice cream didn't taste as good anymore. "What does Kisaka think?"

"He thinks you should go back to Orb. He believes that they'll listen to you, being who you are."

Cagalli swallowed hard, suddenly feeling faint. She pulled her feet away from him. She knew that this was inevitable. And now here it was... "I see..."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Dearka sat there in the middle of Yzak's bed, shaking his head as he watched his friend try to stuff a very heavy-looking book into his already full rolling bag. It was a losing battle. The book was winning.

"You know, there's a rumor spreading that you can actually carry _two _bags instead of just _one_. I heard that it makes packing easier," the Buster pilot said, propping his elbow on his knee and resting his chin in his palm.

Yzak scowled at him, momentarily letting himself get distracted, then finally gave up. Falling down on his bum, he shoved the bag away in disgust. "Don't you have to be somewhere else? Like, I don't know, with Miriallia?"

That shut Dearka up. Yzak had learned that technique two days ago, when he and Miriallia had shared their very first kiss under the rain. And ever since then, the Duel pilot never let it die. Bringing up Miriallia always made his stomach turn inside out, simply because he knew that he was messing things up really bad. And not once had he actually thought that things were better off with him silently desiring her from afar... because every time he came close to her, every time she tried to hold his hand, his brain would turn into jelly and ooze out his ear. That was the time he'd lose all sense of being, and he would start acting like a fool.

_Yep, one of the top soldiers of ZAFT is now eating out of the hands of a girl..._

He smiled crookedly. _I don't care. _

Yzak shuddered. "Oh, God you're thinking about her and you're smiling eerily! Get out of here and let me pack in peace. I have to hurry. My flight bound for Sapporo EA Base from Memambetsu is in five hours, and I haven't even finished packing yet."

"So tell me again why you're taking a plane instead of taking a bus?"

"Because it's quicker that way, genius."

Dearka pretended to clutch his heart, acting like he was hurt. "I didn't know that you wanted to get away from us that badly."

Yzak grabbed the nearest, heaviest book he could get his hands into and chucked it the blonde boy. Dearka caught it swiftly, then put it down next to him. Yzak was not pleased. "Don't be a retard. I'd be expecting you to report when you are called, all right? I hope we aren't forgetting ourselves..."

Dearka nodded. He knew pretty well what he was talking about. In the war, he had abandoned his post and instead had fought against ZAFT in the latter battles alongside the Archangel and the Clyne Faction. And apparently, none was to be forgiven and forgotten. He had thought about that fact almost every waking hour at night, when he wasn't thinking of Miriallia. He had asked himself many times why he didn't leave the Archangel when they were obviously willing to let him go. He had always told himself that it was because of Miriallia that he wanted to stay because he had done something wrong to her that didn't even have anything to do with the war. Yet he knew, that although she was a big part of it, his values were what drove him to fight for what he did. Siding with neither the EA nor ZAFT, both sides driven by the overwhelming desire to survive and have the other perish, he fought for _peace_. Not victory, defined by the obliteration of either side.

And that made all the difference.

At least to him, it did.

And so, even with the fact of facing court martial looming over his head, he had no regrets.

"I know, Yzak," he said levelly, still not changing his expression.

The light-haired boy looked at him oddly, then turned away. "When I get to the PLANTs, I will see what I can do about your case. Perhaps I can pull some strings..." his voice faded as he tried to give the book another shot.

Dearka cocked his head to the right, then nodded. "I appreciate it."

Yzak turned to him again. "Then again, you can always stay here... or in Orb. With Milly."

The though made the Buster pilot's heart beat faster. He really had considered doing that. Life was simpler, out of the military. But he knew that he had nowhere else to go but back home. He shook his head then got up from the bed. "I will answer to your call when you reach PLANT, Yzak. I will report to you as soon as you call for me."

This made Yzak laugh. "You'd leave your girlfriend behind?"

Dearka blinked. It was no laughing matter. "I have to, right?"

His friend smirked, then completely gave up on the book. He stood up and stretched. "That's why I never want to fall in love. In our lifestyle, it's not worth it." He shoved the book in Dearka's hand. "Here. Bring this for me when you follow."

Dearka looked down at it, reading the cover page with much curiosity. "Extra-Sensory Perception? What kind of crap is this?"

Yzak's face reddened. "None of your damn business. Just bring it, all right?"

Dearka stared at the Duel pilot suspiciously. "You think Kari has _ESP_, don't you?"

Yzak sputtered. "Shut up, Dearka."

This was kind of enjoyable. "Kari can read your body language, fool! Not your mind!"

"I know that!"

"Then why are you reading this – "

Yzak snatched the book away and tried to stuff it in the bag again, grumbling. "I ask one favor from you, man. _One friggin' favor _and you completely diss me."

Dearka raised his hands in front of him as if in surrender. "I was just teasing, sorry. By the way, aren't you going to say goodbye to Kari? I think she's in school right now, what with the rescheduling of the Summer Festival."

Yzak paused for a moment, as if searching for something wise to say. Finding none, he wilted. "Leave me alone, all right?"

Kari. Dearka had talked to her in the last few days, asking about her brother and telling her of their plans. She was really nice, and the Buster pilot had even discovered that he liked her. She had the most solemn eyes... Somehow, he felt like she needed to smile more...

_Or cry some..._

Sighing, he made his way through the room. "All right. Anyway, I'll be seeing you in two hours, all right? Athrun and the rest say they want to drive you to the airport."

"Great. Just what I need. Long goodbyes."

Dearka smiled as he placed one hand on the doorknob. "I'll miss you, buddy," he said, then ducked as Yzak hurled the ESP book at him. It hit the door with a bang. The Buster pilot scuttled out of there as fast as his two feet could carry him while he snickered.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Sometimes, there are some things that you have to reach really hard for. There are times that if you don't try hard enough, you won't be able to reach your goal, and in the end, you will be the one to suffer.

And Lacus was experiencing that right about now.

"Can't... reach... pickle relish...," the songstress grunted as she bent down even further into the shelf for what seemed to be the last bottle of pickle relish behind jars and jars of whole pickles. She could hear Miriallia calling to her, telling her to forget it, that their sandwiches can survive without it anyway. She brushed the suggestion aside. She had talked to Dearka about Yzak's favorites. The Buster pilot said Yzak loved pickle relish in his ham sandwiches...

She felt the tips of her fingers brush the side of the bottle teasingly. _Come here, you... _

And she almost had it, too, what with her fingers barely being able to knock it nearer, until she felt someone touch her elbow gingerly. She jumped in surprise, knocking her head on the shelf over her, making the bottles of other vegetables rattle dangerously and noisily. She recoiled in pain and shot out of the shelf in an instant, only to find herself staring into deep grey eyes looking down at her with concern.

_Him again... _"I'm sorry. Did I startle you?"

Yalin smiled down at her, once again impressing her with his beautiful smile. She wanted him to stop. He was starting to freak her out...

Lacus shook her head. "What are you doing here?"

Yalin plucked at the green and white apron hanging over his neck. _City Supermarket_ was printed over it in block letters. "I work here."

_Oh, no..._

It was another surprising discovery, having found out that he worked for a supermarket. It was... too average for a guy like him to be doing. It was like having a magazine model pose for processed meat.

Lacus groaned inwardly, suddenly feeling weak. She rubbed the top of her head, trying to make the pain go away. "I was trying to get that bottle of pickle relish, but it's too far and I can't reach it."

"Why didn't you ask for assistance? I could have spared you the time and effort." He bent down and easily reached into the space where she had poked her head in, and came out holding the offending little jar in his hand. He casually placed it inside the half-full cart Milly was holding, smiling at the orange-haired girl in the process. Milly curled her lips in an attempt to smile back. It made her face look pretty grotesque. The girl gave no effort to disguise her apparent dislike of the boy.

Lacus was not blind. She knew that Yalin was trying to catch her attention, but since she really had not been that experienced when it came to the courting stage (as her first engagement had been pretty much arranged), she did not know how to turn a guy down without having to hurt his feelings. She really was not interested in him, however nice he was to her...

"Thank you," Lacus murmured as she hurried over to Miriallia's side. "We have to get going now."

Yalin smiled. "No problem," he said and started walking away.

Lacus was about to sigh in relief, when she heard Yalin call back to her. She jumped and stared after him, who was now walking away backwards. "Y-yes?" she asked hesitantly.

"Will I be hearing you sing in the Summer Festival? You do know that they're rescheduling it on Monday, right?"

Indeed, Lacus had been informed, but she had adamantly declined. Athrun, too, had refused the offer, for once being able to say no to somebody. He said that he wanted to spend a bit more time with Cagalli, whom he had been neglecting for the past couple of days. Not only that, but the return of their dolls for Health Education was fast approaching, and they were required to make a fifty-page paper about the experience. _The icing on the cake, right...?_

Again, thoughts of Kira flooded her mind. Yes, they had to work together for that project... And it seemed like there was nothing she could do about it. She had been trying hard to avoid him in the last few days. He was trying really hard to talk to her, asking her out, convincing her to talk to him.... She declined everything. Normally, her insides would have melted with the way he was showering her with attention, and her heart would have shattered at the sight of his sad face when she said no to every single thing he had asked of her. But she was human after all, and although she had tried to understand his feelings, she knew that she had to put into consideration _her _own feelings.

_I don't want you running back to me because you're guilty, Kira. _

Lacus turned to Yalin and shook her head. "I won't be singing anymore. Sorry."

The guy shrugged. "It doesn't matter. As long as I see you there. Will I?"

_I don't want you to run back to me just because everyone tells you to._

She smiled at the guy. "I'll try."

That seemed to have satisfied him. He beamed at her, then disappeared down the aisle of canned fruit.

Miriallia turned to her after she watched Yalin leave. "Don't smile at him, Lacus. He might think you're interested."

Lacus turned to her. "I'm sorry. I was just being polite. I won't be showing up in the Festival anyway."

"Still, you shouldn't even pay attention to that smooth talker." Milly carefully took her hand, then examined the bandage wrapped around her wrist. "I told you not to reach in that far. You could have worsened your wrist with all that stretching."

Lacus shook her head. "I'm fine. Now come on. Let's get some ham."

The girl looked at her uncertainly, then finally nodded. "All right. But I still say you should stay away from him."

Lacus laughed out loud as she walked next to Milly while the girl rolled their cart off to the meat section. "Milly! What's wrong? I know that you're really careful about these kinds of things, but aren't you going a little too far? Yalin helped up escape. I don't think he's capable of hurting me."

Milly bit her lower lip, hesitating a bit before continuing. "I know that, Lacus... But... " she turned to the songstress, an unreadable expression in those deep blue eyes. "Lacus, I know that Kira did things to you that he shouldn't have done, and I know that you're trying to save yourself from the possible heartache that he might cause you... but it really does not sit well with me that I would see you with someone else... "

Now that made Lacus stare. She blinked. "You mean like... Yalin and me?"

"Yes."

"I'm not interested in him, Milly. Nor with any other guy out there."

That made Milly pause, grabbing a huge bag of chips from the junk food section, then she turned to Lacus again as they made their way down the long, deserted aisle. "Lacus?"

"Yes?"

"Don't you want to be with Kira anymore?"

Lacus missed a step, but recovered fast. She brushed away her bangs from her eyes and tried to think fast on what to say. But she could not conjure up a lie under that much pressure. She shook her head sadly. "Being with Kira will probably be the happiest moment of my life."

"Then why, Lacus? He's asked you to talk about everything many times now. Why won't you say yes?"

Why _won't _she say yes?

The answer was simple. It's because she found out that although Coordinators were engineered to have stronger immune systems and thus not that susceptible to sickness, it seemed that it gave them no advantage when it came to heartaches. Back in the beach, she thought that everything was all right, that Kira had finally snapped out of his depression and that they could finally get on with their lives. And so what happened in front of the gym had caught her off-guard. She did not know that it could possibly hurt that much. Even just thinking about it made her heart hurt... Kira had pushed her away, simply because of his hang-ups about a girl who she'd discovered didn't return Kira's feelings at all... feelings that she was willing to offer him...

_And now you want to talk to me, Kira? Please, as much as my heart wishes to be with you, leave me at least an ounce of dignity. Don't run after me simply because you have nothing better to do anyway..._

Lacus turned to Miriallia, then smiled, trying to change the subject. "So will we be buying potato or Caesar's?"

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Kira stealthily hid behind the stack of spam in aisle fourteen in the City Supermarket, the blue cap Lacus had given him pulled low over his face. He could feel his heart thundering in his chest when he saw Lacus smile back at Yalin as the boy walked backwards away from them.

The pain of seeing her acknowledge another with that smile of hers surprised him terribly. That smile used to be _his _alone. She used to reserve that smile for him, and now, everyone had the right to share it.

It was official; Lacus Clyne was no longer _his_.

And he had no one to blame but himself.

Not only once had he thought of actually forcing her to talk to him, to make her listen that he really was sorry, and that he will not do it again. But he knew that he was not worthy to even be near her, not after what he did. The times when he had actually tried to ask her out were times when he was sort of feeling lucky. But it turns out that Lacus would not hear of it.

_And it's all my fault..._

Kira stuffed his hands into his pant pockets and leaned on the nearest shelf, sighing sadly. It was actually the first time he's felt so lonely in his entire life. For the first time in a long time, he felt like he had nowhere else to go. It was only then did he realize that life felt empty without the pink-haired songstress. He knew that it sounded too overly dramatic, but God knew it was true. Now that Lacus wouldn't want to talk to him, he suddenly had too much free time. In the last two days, he had done nothing but wander aimlessly on campus or downtown, as everyone was busy with the Festivals all over again. Those times, they used to be allotted for reading Children's books with Lacus, but now that she seemed to have lost interest in him, those hours were whiled away watching Sai and Kazui finish the shooting of Rainbow.

Now it wasn't all bad, really. In fact, he'd actually found it quite entertaining. There were kids present in the set, and he had gotten quite close to them fast. Thoughts of that little girl that gave him the paper flower had threatened to engulf his mind, but he was surprised to discover that he did not feel that much grief over her death. Perhaps he has finally accepted that it really was not his fault, or perhaps it was because of being surrounded by so many kids that he felt like there were better things to do here while you were alive. Such as trying to help those kids. Seeing Kazui and Sai help out with the fundraiser made him feel happy and quite content, and having those kids around him made him feel relaxed.

_At least I have something to do, _he thought to himself as he pushed himself off the shelf. He didn't even know why he was there in the first place. He had to get out of there, before Lacus sees him and she starts treating him like he has tuberculosis or something really contagious. Of course, Lacus didn't exactly treat him like that, but to Kira, it was the same thing. Being avoided by Lacus made him feel that way. He felt unwanted.

He was about to make his way down the aisle when someone touched him on the shoulder. Kira looked up. "Dearka. Hello."

"Thought it was you. I should have recognized the cap." The Buster pilot nodded at him. "You look stoned."

"Huh?"

"Never mind. Look, Lacus and Milly are right on the other side. Come on."

Kira stiffened. He shook his head. "Lacus wouldn't want to talk to me anyway. I have to go."

Dearka glared at him. "Kira, just because Lacus doesn't want to talk to you doesn't mean you have to give up on her already. You have to show her you're really serious about this. And if you give up now, she'll think that you don't care anymore."

"But I _do_ care."

"Exactly. Now go prove it. Talk to her. Ask her out to the Festival. She'll have to say yes."

"How can you be sure she'll say yes?"

"Because she turned down Yalin's invitation. I heard her. I was just a few aisles away from them."

That seemed to make Kira brighten a bit. He turned to Dearka for a moment, then nodded. If she turned Yalin down, then that must mean she's waiting for someone to ask her out, right? Could it be that she's waiting for him? "All right. I'll talk to her."

Dearka nodded. "Atta boy, Kira." He patted the Freedom pilot proudly. "Come on. If you talk to her real sweet, how could she say no?"

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

"She said no," Kira said flatly as he came over to him on the carbonated beverage section.

Dearka almost dropped the bottle of soda he was holding. "She did, huh?" The Buster pilot did not know what to say. Scratching his head, he placed three bottles of soda in the basket at his feet. "How did you tell her anyway?"

Kira withered. "Don't ask. I have to get going. This setting depresses me." And Dearka watched the Freedom pilot slink away, shoulders hunched, head down. He disappeared behind a stack of doggie food. In normal circumstances, the tan boy would have felt sorry for him. But now, he knew that Kira needed the wakeup call. It was better that he felt this depression over Lacus than depression over a dead girl.

_That's it, Kira. Learn the hard way how important she is to you. Learn the hard way that no matter how you hurt, the world won't stop for your grief. Lacus can't wait forever, you know..._

_Well, I hope he shows up in the party for Yzak. _Dearka sighed and was about to turn and grab the basket when Miriallia came. He felt her before he saw her. She poked him at the nape of his neck. Dearka turned and felt all the blood rush to his face at the sight of her. She was smiling up at him with her usual smile. Dearka could not get over the fact that she was finally _his_... But what he couldn't get over was that he was acting like a complete dork in front of her.

_Quick! What do I say?_

"Miriallia... he-hello. Erm... "

Miriallia giggled at him. "I didn't know you were shopping here. We could have gone together. You're assigned with the drinks, right?"

Dearka nodded dumbly. Ever since that kiss, everything was a disaster. He tried to focus. _Clear your mind, Elthman. It's just Miriallia. Your Miriallia. _"I was with Yzak, watching him pack."

She nodded up at him. "I see. Have you seen Kira? I left Lacus in the cashier. The line was long, so I thought I'd talk to him and maybe cheer him up."

"He left already."

She looked disappointed. She was frowning. She shouldn't frown. She should smile all the time. "Really? He asked Lacus out to the Festival, but Lacus said that she had other things to do. Kira didn't look too good..."

It was then did Dearka realize that as long as Miriallia didn't bring up anything romantic between them, and when she didn't try to cuddle him, he was fine. Look! His brain was functioning properly! "Yeah, he looked depressed."

"But you did tell him of the party, right?"

"He knows about it, but I wasn't able to remind him before he left."

"Oh. Well, maybe he'll show up since Lacus will be there." Miriallia reached out and took his hand. "Come on. Lacus is waiting. Let's all go together."

Dearka jumped at her touch. He was one big nerve. Grabbing the basket with his other hand, he let Miriallia lead him away. Swallowing hard, he nodded. "Uh... all right..." He started to concentrate in walking.

_Right foot, left foot. Right foot, left foot. Right foot, left foot..._

He missed a step, staggered and ended up bumping into Miriallia, making her think he was cuddling closer to her. She smiled up at him and slipped her arm though his.

And he could feel his brain turn into mush.

_**0 - 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Yzak sighed in resignation as he tried to even out the bulks of his bag, which he had finally managed to close after an agonizing twenty minutes. It would have been easier if Dearka had helped him, but right after throwing the book about ESP on him, he doubted he'd be back anytime soon. But it was better that he had left. He was starting to ask questions he himself did not like to answer.

_Did you say goodbye to Kari?_

Kari. Why is it that her name needed to be brought up all the time?

Miriallia had told him everything, about Kari having been spied on by her own brother. It was easy enough to believe, that part where Kian had been snooping through her stuff to track down any potential Coordinator in the island. But there was one thing that Yzak could not believe.

"_She doesn't want you to go, Yzak. She erased the message because she found out you're leaving if you knew," _Milly had said to him only yesterday when he met her in the library to get more stuff for the Festival.

He sat down on the bed as the whole conversation with Miriallia rippled through his thoughts.

"_I have duties to attend to. I can't stay here simply because some girl I barely know wants me to stay. A whole colony is demanding for my return. My mother is calling me back. Now you tell me what I should do."_

"_I'm not telling you to call your departure off, Yzak. I'm just saying that maybe you should go talk to her before you go."_

"_What for? It's not like she cares."_

"_That's the point. I think she does. She erased your message because she doesn't want you to go... Don't you think you owe her a goodbye at least?"_

"_I don't owe her nothing. She was partly responsible for the whole mess to begin with."_

"_Yzak!"_

"_Listen Milly. I'm not good with good-byes. Heck! My helloes aren't any better. I know that I'm probably going to say something really rude to her and she'll have to remember me forever as that rude Coordinator guy who had no manners. Let that talk in the rain be the last thing she'd remember of me. I want nothing to do with her."_

Yzak buried his head in his hands and shivered involuntarily. Miriallia had let him win the argument then, simply because he was starting to raise his voice. He was never really good with those kinds of things. And for someone who's been used to holding in his emotions, he wasn't that good when it came to his temper. And so Milly had dropped the subject altogether.

Yzak, however, was left to ponder on the things she had said all day and all night. _Kari... she doesn't want me to go... Could it be that she... cares...?_

But he knew that whatever the answer to that was, it really wouldn't matter. He had to leave, and so perhaps it was better if neither of them tried to confuse the issue even more. He himself was boggled by the emotions he felt when she was near. He had seen her in school when he used the library to mail to his mother two days ago. She was wearing jeans and a loose pink shirt, her now-shoulder length reddish-blond hair swishing with every movement. She was making her way thought the soccer field to the gym, probably to make more adjustments to the MemS. (Those bloody machines...) He did not believe she saw him, but that was the last time his eyes had grazed her beauty. And it will have to remain the last.

He fell back on the bed and groaned as he stared at the ceiling. Now things will be less complicated. All he had to do now was run a whole space colony. Sweet. No more women that tend to complicate everything.

_Things will be simpler by then. I should be happy._

He closed his eyes for a moment, feeling suddenly tired. He needed a nap. It was going to be quite a trip back to PLANT. He didn't even know if he was excited to leave. All he knew was that in a matter of hours, he'll be home, and a million miles away from the phantom that had been haunting his dreams for some time now.

In the whirlwind of thought, he did not even realize he had fallen asleep. Opening his eyes to discover it was already dark out, he quickly checked his watch. _Six thirty. I've been sleeping for two hours... _

Getting up to turn on the lights, he heard something bump against his bedroom door from the outside. He felt his muscles tighten as he knew that he was all alone in the dorm. What was that sound?

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Athrun bit his lip nervously as Dearka crouched on the floor, clutching his side. Although his ribs were healing faster than normal, touching it still hurt. And the Justice pilot could just imagine the pain that jolted through the boy's side when he accidentally bumped the plastic bag full of soda on Yzak's door, thus pressing it against his ribs. He wanted to help the guy out but navigating in the dark with a huge bowl of potato salad wasn't an easy feat, especially when you don't want to be discovered.

He heard Cagalli shuffle through the living area, rummaging through a big paper bag of crepe paper and party hats. Athrun had disapproved of those. He knew Yzak wouldn't want to wear any of those, but since Cagalli had insisted, he couldn't say no. Milly, Lacus and the princess started to deck the furniture with the crepe as he and Dearka set up the things on the table. There really wasn't much of it. Just some salad, sandwiches, cake and drinks. It was a good enough party, especially when planned in a hurry. The girls had thought of throwing the Duel pilot a farewell party, probably just for the heck of it. Or maybe they really did want to make Yzak remember his last day with them.

Athrun placed the bowl of salad in the middle of the dining table and watched as Dearka recovered from the blow. Half-crawling, half-walking, the tan boy managed to make his way through the furniture and to the table.

"Are you all right?" he asked.

"Yeah," Dearka grunted. "I guess that's all. What else do we need?"

The Justice pilot looked around the dark dorm and sighed. "Kira's not here yet. Will he be showing up?"

Dearka didn't answer at once as he straightened up. He hesitated for a bit before answering. "We stumbled upon each other earlier in the supermarket, and he saw Yalin talking to Lacus. He tried to do the same thing, but she waved him away. He looked depressed after that."

"I see. Maybe he'll change his mind." Athrun looked over to Cagalli, who in turn nodded and signaled for him to call Yzak in his room. He nodded back and made his way to the room Dearka had defined as Yzak's. Preparing to knock, he raised his knuckles and was about to rap at the door when it suddenly flew open and something unseen tried to ram itself against his jaw. Luckily, Athrun was fast enough and he sidestepped before it hit him. One moment, the room was dark, and the next moment, light spilled from inside Yzak's room. Lacus, Miriallia and Cagalli all screamed, "**_SURPRISE!!!_**" gaily as they too flipped the switch of the living room lights.

Athrun ended up staring at a very bored-looking Yzak standing by the doorframe. He looked like he had just woken up.

"I thought you were a burglar or something, sorry." The Duel pilot looked around the room that Athrun also saw as already decorated, with a banner that said _Bon Voyage Yzak!!! _in block letters. He could see Yzak shiver involuntarily as Milly made her way to him and strapped a purple party hat on his head. Ignoring the look on the light-haired Coordinator's face, he wore the other party hat that Cagalli had forced him into wearing. It was pink... Not a very flattering color...

"We decided to throw a party for you before you leave. You know, so that you'll remember us," Lacus said as she handed Yzak a plate of a slice of chocolate cake. "We got you your favorites. See? Chocolate cake."

Yzak stared down at the triangular slice of brown cake with gobs and gobs of black icing. After that, he stared at everyone. "I hate chocolate cake."

Everyone fell silent.

Cagalli stared at him as if he just said that he'd like to meet Bozo the clown. "What?"

Yzak stared back. "I hate chocolate cake."

Silence.

After that, four heads turned to Dearka.

"But you said you liked chocolate," the Buster pilot pointed out as he put on the blue party hat.

Yzak shook his head. "I like _chocolate_. Chocolate cakes are a different story. I like Coffee Crumble better."

Dearka stared at him for a brief moment, then started to grumble. "You just have to ruin our fun, don't you?"

The Duel pilot blinked, then looked down at the cake again. "I didn't say I won't eat it. It just isn't my favorite cake."

Athrun sighed in relief. At least he wasn't being hostile. He had thought that he wouldn't appreciate it. But then again, Yzak had changed in his short stay in Hokkaido with them. Maybe it was just him, but in one way or another, he seemed a more sociable person than before... Maybe it was because the pressure was finally off him. Too bad, he was going back to his old life again. Too bad...

Athrun sighed as he helped himself with some soda as sat down on one of the chairs in the dining room. The knowledge that Yzak was finally going back to PLANT made him wonder once again about his future. With his parents dead, he knew that there really wasn't anywhere he could go to... So technically, he was homeless. He didn't know of any relatives who'd be taking him in, and going back to the military did not seem as appealing as it used to. Then again, it was not his choice to be in the military to begin with. It was just an expectation from his father that he had to fulfill, and now that he was gone, he found no reason to go back to that kind of life.

_I have better things going for me now, _he thought to himself as he watched Cagalli from the other side of the room, helping Milly with the salad. He waved at her when the princess saw he was staring. Whispering something to Milly, she put down the bowl she was holding, then started towards him.

"Why are you here, all alone?" she asked as she sat down next to him, knuckling his temple affectionately. "Trying to act cool by staying quiet?"

That made Athrun laugh. "Hardly. I was just thinking about... a lot of things."

Cagalli peered up at his face and blinked. "It seems like we're almost ready to part ways, huh?"

The Justice pilot looked down at her. "What do you mean?"

"Yzak is going back to PLANT, and I'm going back to Orb. I haven't told Milly yet, but I'm guessing she'd like to come with me. Her parents are there. I'm going to tell Kazui and Sai of my return to Orb, too. And maybe drag Kira with me if I have to. He _is _my brother, after all."

Athrun smiled. "Guess you have everything planned, huh?"

Cagalli leaned back and examined something on the ceiling. "These are my people, after all. I have a lot of living up to do. I want to bring back the Orb that my father used to rule. I want Orb to go back to its neutral state, and not get consumed by the hatred."

He nodded. Cagalli will be a good ruler. She was strong as she was gentle. She would know what to do, and he did not doubt it. But still, he could not stop but think about them. He turned to her. "I'll miss you."

Cagalli glared at him oddly. "Why?"

"Why? Of course I will miss you. With all the work that you have to do, I don't even see the possibility of seeing you anytime soon."

Cagalli laughed.

Athrun felt genuinely hurt. It was not funny. He really would miss Cagalli. He had gotten so used to having her around, ready to cheer him up when he felt really down, always so full of spirit that it was difficult not to want to be around her in every possible second. And tomorrow, Kisaka was going to take her away, and he had no choice but to let her go. "It's not funny."

Cagalli suddenly took his hand and laced her fingers with his. "Athrun! Do you really believe that I'd leave you here?"

With this, he paused. Wait a minute... does she mean... "You're taking me along?"

She nodded. "Of course! I wouldn't have it any other way."

That made Athrun smile shyly. Here he thought that Cagalli was too busy planning for her country, when in reality she was also thinking about him. "I'm glad."

The princess sneered. "Of course, you _do _know that I don't want you freeloading off of me."

Athrun swallowed hard. Whoa. This was something he didn't think about before. "But I have no place to go in Orb... "

"You'll be staying with me, of course. But you ain't gonna get board and lodging for free."

"What? You're going to make me work for you? I don't know anything but pilot a Gundam and invent a few nonsensical stuff... "

"You will be my personal bodyguard," she pointed out happily.

Athrun was speechless. "... bodyguard...?"

Cagalli narrowed her eyes at him. "You are assigned a very important task, Mr. Zala. The princess of Orb needs someone she could trust with her life. This person has to be vigilant and alert and highly skilled in combat." She winked. "You have to be _always _within arms reach, _always _ready to heed the call of the princess. _Wherever _she goes, you must follow. No matter what."

Thoughts swirled in Athrun's mind, making him dizzy. Always with Cagalli... that wasn't a job! That was a blessing! But he pretended like he did not like it. "Damn. It's a dirty job, but someone has to do it..."

"Yeah. Especially if you don't want to get thrown out into the streets of Orb, homeless and hungry," she teased.

The Justice pilot pulled her closer and leaned his forehead on hers. "I will offer you my life, Princess Cagalli Yula Attha. My blood spilled before yours."

Cagalli grimaced. "God, you don't have to sound so serious about this. It's not like there are people out there who'd want to kill me or anything."

"One could never be sure." What with the way things were going, nothing _was _sure. He never wanted Cagalli's life to be put to danger ever again. Not if he could help it. He was gone for only five hours then, and she was taken as a hostage without his knowledge. They had threatened her with a blade while he was away...! Thoughts of what could have possibly happened to her made his heart clench painfully.

_I swear that you will never be in danger again, Cagalli. So long as I breathe..._

Cagalli smiled at his serious expression, then pulled away. "If you're so intent on this, then fine. My life is in your hands, Mr. Zala."

At least she took him seriously with that.

The party pretty much carried on by itself, and at least Yzak loved the sandwiches and at some point, Athrun had even seen him sneak a few into his room. He was probably bringing some along for his trip.

After about an hour or so, the Justice pilot began to think where Kira could be. Maybe he really wasn't going to show up after all. Gazing across the room at Lacus, who was laughing with Dearka, Milly and Yzak about Tento Land, he wondered if the reason why he wasn't showing was because of the songstress.

It was eight in the evening when everyone had finally had their fill on food and drinks and had handed Yzak their farewell gifts. After that, the Duel pilot finally announced that he had to go.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Kari tried to brush her hair over her shoulder out of habit, only to find out that she didn't need to do it anymore. Sitting on an uncomfortably hard wooden chair by the door of the gym, she looked at the huge digital clock on top of the scoreboard. It was already eight in the evening. She knew that he was probably on his way to Memambetsu airport. Dearka had told her of his plans, and of the party that they were holding. She did not go to the party, simply because she knew that Yzak probably wouldn't want her there anyway.

She looked out the gym and smiled at the millions and millions of stars dotting the dark sky. She loved stars... They were so lovely to look at... It reminded her of her father so much. They used to spend hours and hours just lying down on the grass and looking out into the night sky... The night before he left for Orb – the night before he died – they had been staring at the sky, deciphering constellations and watching out for falling stars. It was a good memory. He had been really dear to her.

She knew that her mother thought of her as cold, because she had never even shed one single tear for her father when she found out of his death. In all honesty, she wanted to cry a river. Her heart had been ripped into tiny shreds that night when she found out he was gone.... she had loved her father so much...

Which was why she never cried...

She was ten then, when her most beloved dog, Ai-chan had died. And she cried for days because of it. And on the fourth day when she was still crying, her father had called her to a corner, gripped her shoulders and said, _"When we cry for our beloved dead, they will cry with us. Ai-chan will be sad if she knew you are crying because of her. She will think that she is the reason why you are sad... So stop crying and let Ai-chan be happy."_

Kari hugged herself as a strong wind blew in from outside, making her hair flutter around her, tickling the nape of her neck. When she had learned of her father's death, she willed her tears not to fall. She wanted her father to be happy...

She readjusted her laptop on her lap and looked back at the four machines sitting in the dark in the middle of the gym. She had just finished doing some minor adjustments on them for the Festival on Monday, and was quite tired. She was supposed to visit her brother in Higashimokoto early tomorrow morning, but she was feeling really tired and was thinking of postponing the visit.

Kian. What a headache. She hadn't known that he was that bitter about their father's death. Maybe a few months in rehab will do him good. At least now she knew that she needed to be careful next time. They really were related. Both of them seemed to have a fetish for hacking files.

She suddenly caught herself smiling to herself. She had gotten the password for Yzak's account in one of the library computers, because it was the same old computer he was using every time. At first, she felt totally guilty for even thinking of prowling through it, but since Yzak never wanted to cooperate with her and her thesis, she had thought of doing it anyway.

And when she found out of the e-mail his mother sent, she could not explain the sadness she felt at the knowledge that he was leaving. She was not going to lie to herself. She did not want him to leave, for a reason she did not know...

Kari had never met anyone as easy to read as he. He was the type of person who would insist on leashing his emotions but in the end do the opposite of it. It was kind of cute, really. He was so set on hiding his feelings to everyone. She knew that this was the reason why he hated her. He did not want to be found out.

Two years had molded her into what she was now; being able to 'read' how other people behave. She was so used to doing it, that she did not even realize when she was already annoying someone with her apparent assumptions on what they were thinking, which majority of the time end up totally correct.

_And Yzak hates me because of it._

Now to make a big deal out of it would definitely make her appear out of character. She usually did not care what other people think of her. What annoys her is that she cares what _Yzak _thinks. And now that he was leaving, he was going to remember her as that girl who tried to trick him, and the girl who hacked his account...

How sad...

Shaking her head, she opened her laptop and immediately went through the files she had collected about Yzak Jule. It really wasn't that long, since he really did not try to support her project. Smiling sadly, she pointed the cursor to the delete button and, feeling quite melancholic about it, she clicked on it. The files were then erased from her folder.

_And hopefully, erased from my thoughts..._

Her fingers danced through the keyboard as she surfed the net, trying to distract herself from the strong desire to run out of the gym and hail a taxi to Memambetsu airport. Pop-up ads flashed here and there, and after a while, she immediately lost it. She could not help it. Typing fast on the keyboard, she found herself staring at Yzak's mail moments later...

She gulped nervously as she saw the monitor scream out to her. **_Welcome Yzak Jule! You have 1 new message(s)_**.

Fingers shaking, she navigated the cursor to the inbox link and clicked.

_God, what am I doing? Why am I doing this? Why?_

She tried to rationalize that since Yzak did not change his password, then it was his fault to begin with. Which was really lame. There was no excuse for what she was doing, but she couldn't help herself...

The message was once again from Yzak's mom.

_Well, since I've gone this far, I might as well read it..._

Click!

And Kari's eyes widened in shock. Reading the very straightforward message, she gasped at what she discovered.

The e-mail went like this:

_Yzak,_

_I am sorry to inform you that there has been a sudden change of plans. As I had informed you in my first letter, I had gotten you a position in the High Council and it seemed that the remaining others have agreed, thinking that young blood would do the PLANTs a lot of good. But only yesterday, there has been a terrible incident. It appears that there are many Zala supporters running amok in the space colony, and do not agree with us. They had been causing great disturbances of late, and I do not think that they will be pleased to have you here now. The Council at present is trying to ease things as of now, but I suggest that you stay on Earth for the time being, until we settle this very disturbing predicament. Patrick Zala's supporters are pretty much as aggressive as Zala himself, and are doing rowdy acts to hinder the decision of the council regarding the Peace Treaty. I dare not go into detail... But please take my advice and stay on Earth. I fear that your life might be put into danger, as the position I am rooting for you is up for grabs. If you come to PLANT now, I cannot guarantee your safety. And if anything happened to you, it will bring me much grief... _

_I shall inform you of what will happen here. Know that I love you, Yzak. _

_Be safe always. And do not worry about your mother. I am all right._

Snapping her laptop shut, Kari bolted out of the gym in a dead run. She glimpsed over her shoulder at the scoreboard. _Eight-twenty five... Yzak leaves for Memambetsu at eight-thirty. I'm not going to make it if I try to catch them in the dorm... But maybe... if I intercept them in Memambetsu..._

She barreled her way thought the soccer field, her legs carrying her faster than she thought they could. Yzak didn't even bother to read his mother's reply, and now he was going home to a place that wasn't even settled if they wanted him!

She did not know who those Zala supporters were, but it was obviously not going to be good for Yzak. And if she wouldn't be able to stop him, he might be headed to apparent danger...

She had never felt this worried in her life. The serene demeanor she had always tried to maintain was shattered in an instant, but she didn't care.

_You don't need to go home, Yzak!_

She made he way to the empty streets and almost ended up crashing into someone as she made a left to the bus stop.

"Whoa. Where's the fire?"

Kari skidded to a stop and sucked in a deep breath when she realized who it was. "Kira! Where's Yzak?"

Suddenly, Kazui and Sai materialized behind him.

"What's going on?" Sai asked.

Kari shook her head. "No time to explain. Come with me."

She had to stop him... Hopefully, if she makes it in time, Yzak will forgive her for having hacked his account again.

_Don't leave Yzak..._

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_**Yuugiri: Oh, well. This is just an interlude, I guess. Nothing much happened. I was just introducing more of the story, and trying to develop the characters a bit more... **_

_**Please leave me a review. I would like to know what you think.**_

_**Suggestions are welcome. They will be put into consideration. And for the questions that you leave, it will be answered by the story itself. Thank you!**_


	22. Phase 22: Once Upon A Time

_**Yuugiri: been a while... sorry. Well, it really isn't an action-packed chap again, but bear with it anyway... not my fave chap, but since my brain really isn't functioning well, I couldn't help it. LOL! Thanks for the reviews in the last chapter.**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed...**_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_**July 16 AW :: evening**_

Cagalli slowly bent down Yzak's bed to peer down at the little doll lying down on its back, surrounded by a number of fluffy white pillows. Her little Cathrun. She glimpsed briefly at the two other dolls next to her "baby" and sighed. They were supposed to return the dolls next Monday along with the paper Mrs. Takano had asked of them. Too bad she had to return Cathrun early... She will be leaving Abashiri tomorrow evening...

She smiled as the doll cooed softly then started to snore. The princess of Orb never really realized how attached she had been to this annoyingly noisy object. Looking over her shoulder to where Athrun stood behind her, she sighed. "Are you sure you don't want us to walk you to the car?"

The Justice pilot shook his head and slipped his hands into his pant pockets. "It's better if you, Lacus and Milly stay here. Dearka and I will be back soon to take you to the women's RQ in three or so hours. Meanwhile you clean up here and wait for Kazui and Sai to arrive."

Cagalli laughed. So that was the real purpose! Athrun had insisted that the three girls stay put because – according to Athrun – it was too dangerous outside at this time of night. But now Cagalli saw through the excuse. She narrowed her eyes at him. "You don't want to be the one to explain to Kazui and Sai why Yzak left without saying goodbye, do you?"

Athrun blinked, confused. "What? No."

"Admit it."

"I'm telling you the truth. I want you to stay here and while you're at it, you can tell Milly of your return to Orb. You do plan to take her along, right? As well as Kazui and Sai?"

That made her pause. She turned to him seriously. "If it were up to me, I really would not want to bring them in a setting that still required a lot of fixing. But they're going to want to come with me anyway, if they found out I'm leaving. At least Kazui and Sai would, and I know Milly misses her family. She's been talking to them on the phone for the last couple of months."

"What about Dearka?"

"What about him?"

"How will he take it?"

Cagalli sneered. "That's up to you to tell him."

Athrun withered. "All right. What about Kira and Lacus?"

That made Cagalli pause again. She really did not know what to say to Lacus. She supposed she could bring her along, but bringing Athrun was enough a risk already. More so Kira, and with the very unstable society in Orb, she really did not know if she could handle as much. She still had to talk to Kisaka about a lot of things... Sighing, she straightened up and began to tug at her ear, deep in thought. Maybe she shouldn't bring them along after all...

Athrun touched her shoulder gently. "Don't stress too much. It'll all be okay. Come on. Yzak is probably having a fit now from all the waiting."

Which was not true. When they stepped into the living room, the Duel pilot was sitting on the couch, reading a book that Lacus had given to him as a going-away gift. Dearka was helping Milly with the dishes and Lacus was nowhere in sight. When Yzak saw them, he blinked then looked back down at the book. He sure did not look like someone who was in a hurry to leave.

Athrun patted Cagalli on the shoulder, then nodded. "I'll check on the rent-a-car downstairs," he said, then nodded at Yzak. "I'll be back."

"Sure," Cagalli said and watched as the Justice pilot disappear out the door of the dorm. She turned to Yzak then, crossing her arms over her chest loosely. "Hey."

The Duel pilot looked up briefly, then grunted, returning his gaze at the book.

Curiosity getting the best of her, Cagalli went around the couch and peered over the light-haired boy's shoulder. "What are you reading?"

Yzak flipped the book cover for her to read.

"_Journey of the Wind _by _Tomihiro Hoshino_? What's that?"

"It's a collection of artwork and literature by this guy who used to be a gymnastics teacher. But he became paralyzed from the neck down when he met an accident two weeks after he started working. He spent nine years in rehab, just lying down on his back, staring at the ceiling."

This made Cagali frown as she bent down and turned the pages of the book. The pages revealed to her this terrific tapestry of colorful flowers and a Japanese poem that was translated in English in the footer. "If he's paralyzed from the neck down, how did he create this painting of a flower? These are exquisite!"

Yzak paused for a bit, then smiled. It was weird, having to see him smile like that. It was definitely a change from the usual cocky smirk in his face. "He holds the brush in his mouth and paints that way. Cool, huh?"

Cagalli was in awe. "Really."

Yzak flipped through the book again and stopped to a page that showed pear blossoms in the background, and a poem beside it. "He wanted to die then, those nine years. Felt like he was useless, and there was no point in living when you're pretty much like a dead guy. But when he found out he could do this, he started gaining a new purpose in life." He handed Cagalli the book. "I like this poem the most."

Cagalli read it.

_Camellia flowers, I hear,_

_Drop down like severed heads._

_People say that under cherry trees_

_Dead bodies are buried._

_Gold-banded Lilies, I hear,_

_Like the sound of people moaning._

_People say that the spider lily_

_Blooms best in graveyards._

_Flowers, beautiful as you are,_

_Why is death so near you?_

_What are the bonds between beauty_

_And human life?_

_Creepy... _Now in reality, Cagalli did not know what to say. Why was Yzak showing this to her?

Yzak closed the book. "Lacus gave this to me. I like it. Tell her I said thanks. She's in Sai's room, sleeping. I don't want to disturb her. But I have to go now, so I won't be able to say it to her for myself."

Now if Cagalli didn't know any better, she'd think Yzak was actually being a bit sentimental. She would normally rub it in, but since she knew that Yzak would not take that too well, she simply nodded. "I will. You take care, Yzak. I'm glad that we got to spend some time together like this."

Yzak stood up and stretched. "It was fun. I really enjoyed."

The princess hesitated for a bit before speaking again. "Yzak?"

"What?"

"Tomorrow, I am going back to Orb, too. Things are not going well there."

The guy eyed her seriously. "What has happened?"

"Nothing serious. Nothing I can't handle."

"What is it?"

"My people don't think Coordinators could be trusted with the peace treaty."

And then they were silent. The princess could understand, really. Yzak Jule was now among the High Council of PLANT, and probably hearing of distrust from the other party was not exactly the perfect going-away gift from her. She smiled. "I'm going there to straighten this out with them, and so there are chances that we might be seeing each other again in the future."

Yzak shrugged indifferently. "So?"

That got Cagalli annoyed. She was being civil here, and here was Yzak, not caring. "So, nothing. I just wanted you to know."

He snorted. "And I suppose you're taking Athrun with you?"

"He has nowhere else to go. I can't just leave him here."

"And what about the others?"

"I haven't talked to them yet. But my plan is to take Milly, Sai and Kazui with me. Kira and Lacus are quite hard to smuggle in without raising a controversy, being Coordinators and all."

"You're forgetting someone."

"Dearka?"

Yzak blinked at her, then picked up his luggage. "You do know pretty well that I can't take him with me, either."

"Why?"

"He abandoned his post in the earlier battles against the EA, before the final battle. The Council would not be pleased."

Cagalli narrowed her eyes at him suspiciously. "Wait a minute. What's going to happen to him?"

"With my influence, hopefully nothing bad. Meanwhile, can't you take care of him for the meantime?" He looked up when the door opened and admitted a neutral-looking Athrun.

"We're all set." The Justice pilot called for Dearka, who appeared from the kitchen followed by Milly who was drying her hands on a yellow towel.

Cagalli smiled at Yzak. "I'll see what I can do."

Yzak uncertainly shuffled his feet, and after a while reached out a shaky hand to her. "Looking forward to having peaceful relations between Orb and PLANT, Cagalli."

The princess looked at his hand, then his face. She shook her head in disbelief, leaned forward and gave Yzak a hug. The Duel pilot stiffened automatically. "Take care, Yzak."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

"We have to stop Yzak from leaving!"

Kira frowned as Kari gripped his arm tightly. It was remarkable, having to see so much emotion in her eyes that night. It was like she wasn't Kari at all. He tried to slow her down as they turned to the bus station in a hurry. "Kari, what's wrong? Is Yzak in danger?"

Kazui, who was following them a few feet away, suddenly spoke. "What do you mean stop Yzak from leaving? Where is he going?"

Kira swallowed hard. He almost forgot that no one had bothered to tell these two that the Duel pilot was actually going back to PLANT tonight. Of course, he knew for himself, but he really did not want to spoil everyone's fun by being there... He's been doing that too many times in the week already. Another reason why he did not show up for the party was because he knew that it was another opportunity to be rejected by Lacus. Man... and it just depressed the heck out of him when she'd look at him uncharacteristically cold, then turn away.

Sai scratched his head. "Will someone please explain things? Does this have anything to do with Kian and his gang again? Coz I thought he's in the loony bin already."

Kira stared at the girl. "Is that it? Does this have anything to do with Kian? He's not trying to get to Yzak, is he?"

Kazui butted in again. "Why do we have to stop Yzak from leaving, when he's not going anywhere to begin with?"

Kari finally released the Freedom pilot's arm, thankfully because it was starting to go numb. "Yzak can't go back to PLANT – "

"_Yzak's going back to PLANT?!" _both Kazui and Sai screamed loudly, causing Kira to stare at them in surprise.

Kari turned to them. "Didn't you know?"

Kira shoved them aside. "Kari, talk to me. What's going on?"

She tried to regain composure, breathing deeply, then asked a question that caught Kira off-guard. "What are the Zala supporters? And who's Patrick Zala?"

And Kira felt the air catch in his throat. Even Sai and Kazui gasped in unison. Of course, who could forget dear Patrick Zala, Athrun's father... the one responsible for the firing of the GENESIS and the loss of countless lives in the destruction of Ptolemaeus base on the moon... The old loon had died in the final battle, right after making sure the big guns would take more lives with him. Of course, it was not a surprise to learn that there are others like him who still seem to share the same deranged thinking, driven with that desire to eliminate all Naturals into extinction and thus creating a new species of humans...

_What a nutcase..._

Shaking his head, he felt his muscles tensing. "What are you trying to say, Kari? What's happening?"

She trembled slightly. "Kira, I found out something. These Zala supporters, whoever they are, are causing political disturbances in PLANT. I don't know much about it, but Yzak should not go to PLANT."

Kazui once again interrupted. "What the heck is going on?! What are you talking about Yzak going back to PLANT? He never told us anything!"

Kira sighed and blandly explained. "Yzak is going back to PLANT tonight. He's leaving for Sapporo EA base in five minutes, and we need to stop him or he might be in big trouble. Don't look at me like that. It was his decision to leave without saying goodbye to you."

That left both of them silent and quite offended.

Kira rubbed his forehead in confusion. He did not see what the commotion was all about. It's not like it would be too late if they didn't catch up to Yzak in Memambetsu. They could always just call the EA Sapporo and talk to Burin Dellit and ask him to meet Yzak and tell him the news. It was simple. A bit impractical yes, since Yzak will have to fly back to Abashiri again, but it was a sure bet anyway.

Kari read his thoughts immediately, as usual. "You don't understand. Once Yzak is there, he won't turn back. He'd go back to PLANT anyway, regardless of the warning."

"Why is that?"

"Because he'sYzak."

Which was a good enough reason for Kira to believe that she was right. The Duel pilot always struck him to be that kind of person who did not like wasting time, effort and energy. And so he was sure that Yzak would simply board the shuttle to PLANT for the mere reason that he's flown all the way from Abashiri already, so there would be no reason to turn back. "You're right." Kira turned to his friends. "Kazui, call the dorm. Hurry. You might be able to catch them. Though I doubt it."

Kazui snapped out of his blank state and nodded, scuttling away in a hurry, grumbling about being unappreciated.

"Sai? Are you with us?"

Sai blinked at him, then nodded seriously. "What will we be doing?"

Kari smiled at him gratefully. "Thank you, Kira."

Kira was surprised as he saw her study him with those green eyes of hers. Her face was unreadable, that now given a concrete plan of action, she seemed to have calmed down a bit and had reverted to her old, serene self. If he didn't know any better, he'd actually think that Kari liked Yzak, but he knew that Kari was not capable of feeling such emotions. Which in reality he was grateful for; if she really did like that rock of a man, then she was obviously out for a heartache. He was about to say something when he felt something small and pudgy grab at his leg.

He looked down in alarm as he saw what it was.

Her name was Eiko, and she was three years old. With shoulder-length brown hair in a loose braid, and big brown eyes on her round face, she looked like a doll. A doll that was looking up at him reproachfully.

"Kira, why did you leave us there? You told us you'd be telling us a bedtime story!" she said in her little voice.

Kira groaned to himself as he finally did remember that he had promised these kids a story.

Eiko's parents had died in Orb. Of course, the rest of the kids who were staying in Abashiri pretty much had that same story to tell: Orb was attacked and then they lost their parents. Majority of them were brought to Abashiri and were being raised in an orphanage that was inside the University Campus grounds. These were the kids Kira had gotten to spend time with, ever since Lacus stopped finding the time to forgive him...

Kari stared at him with those eyes again, then looked down at the little girl. "You are helping in the orphanage?"

Kira gently patted the girl's head. When she didn't stop looking all forlorn, he bent down and picked her up. She squealed in delight, giggling as she wrapped her stubby arms around his neck. "Sort of. I couldn't help but get close to them really fast... They're good kids."

"Hi!" Eiko said as she looked at Kari happily. "When I grow up, I'm gonna marry Kira!"

Kari blinked twice, then smiled. "Really now?"

Kira snickered. "Believe me, all of them say they want to marry me." _Too bad Lacus doesn't. Heck, she wouldn't even talk to me... _He shifted his hold on the girl. "Just a minute. I'll just drop her back off to the Orphanage and I'll be back."

Sai shook his head, "Kira, you promised these kids you'd tell them a story."

Kira started to protest. "But Yzak – "

Kari seconded. "No, Kira. You promised to those kids, so you keep it. Believe me, there really isn't much happy moments for these little kids to go around with."

"What? Don't tell me you're going alone?"

Sai cocked his head to the right. "I'll accompany her. Don't worry about it."

"Are you sure?"

He nodded. "We'll be fine."

Kira hesitated for a bit before finally yielding. Eiko was his favorite. She reminded him of that little girl who gave him the flower. Eiko squealed again when she heard her "husband-to-be" was staying. "All right. Just... be careful. And make it in time. And Kari?"

The serene girl waited for him to continue.

"How did you know these things?"

She paused before finally saying it. "I hacked into his account again."

"God help us all..."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

About twenty minutes of silence stretched between the three Coordinators as Athrun drove down the fairly busy streets of Okhotsku. Dearka was sitting beside him on the passenger seat, while Yzak was stretched out in the back, his feet propped on the backrest of the Buster pilot's seat. None seem to want to talk about anything, since they all knew where it would be leading to, anyway: their parting of ways.

"Guess this is it, huh, Yzak?" Athrun said, breaking the silence.

Yzak merely grunted.

Dearka looked over his shoulder briefly, then propped his elbow on the open window, admiring the lights dotting the landscape. Once again, he asked himself how Japan managed to preserve its greenery. "Is that the only thing you have to say?" Well, in reality, Dearka did not mind having him say nothing. In fact, he kind of thought it was for the best. He had seen Yzak with his goodbyes. He was not lying when he said he was not good with it.

But that only applied to the people he cared about deeply...

_Hmmm. Interesting,.. that must mean...Hehehehe!_

Athrun drummed his fingers on the stirring wheel as he waited for the light to turn green. He chuckled a bit. "It's been a while since we've actually spent time together, the three of us. That last time was when had a recon mission on Onogoro Island in Orb, if I'm not mistaken."

Dearka shuddered at the memory. "Now all we need is pasty-colored overalls and stupid-looking caps to make it work." He had hated wearing those overalls. It made him itch so bad... Wasn't very attractive to look at either...

Yzak snorted noisily, but didn't say anything. But that was because he looked nice in those overalls...

Dearka was expecting Athrun to mention Nicol, but he wisely left the issue out of the conversation. It was a sad thought. They didn't need any of those, and wouldn't need any of it for a very long time. Instead, the blue-black haired boy simply turned to him and spoke. "Speaking of Orb, I have something to tell you."

"You sound serious."

"I am."

"If you're going to ask me to marry you, I adamantly refuse."

Yzak snickered silently.

Athun frowned. "You're not making this easier for me."

Dearka scratched his head. "Sorry. I couldn't resist. What is it?"

It was so Athrun to say things straight out. He took a deep breath and sighed as the light finally turned green and they rolled off into the highway. "Cagalli and I are leaving for Orb tomorrow evening. And she's taking Milly with her."

Dearka laughed. "What?"

"You heard me. She's taking Milly with her, along with Sai and Kazui."

Dearka paled. This was not funny. The only reason why he was staying in Abashiri was now _leaving_? This can't possibly be happening! Everything was almost falling into place for him! And then this? He turned to the Justice pilot. "Why?"he demanded.

"Orb is calling for Cagalli to come back. Milly has a family she has to go come home to." Athrun turned to him, something – could it be pity? - going on behind those deep eyes. "I should have told you earlier, but I didn't know how to tell you. We just found out earlier in the day."

Yzak kicked the headrest of his chair from behind, and the Buster pilot's head bounced painfully on the cushion.

"Quit it, man." The Buster pilot tried to claw at him, but he scuttled away to the far end of the back seat.

"You don't have to be left behind here, retard," Yzak said. "Go with Milly. I'm sure she wouldn't mind."

Dearka paused, then brightened. Of course! It was simple! He turned to Athrun again. "I can come along, can't I?"

Athrun smiled his small smile and loosened his grip on the wheel. "I would have suggested that earlier if it were that easy to begin with. The socio-political situation in Orb is quite unstable right now. That's the reason why Cagalli has to go back. She's taking me along, but not without knowing the risk of smuggling a Coordinator in a country that was once destroyed by Coordinators." He peered out the open window and sighed. "I'm not stopping you, if you want to come with Milly. And in fact I would find the company quite welcoming. But I think you should talk to Milly and Cagalli first. It's not my decision to make to begin with. Cagalli is probably talking to Lacus and Milly right now, about our departure."

Dearka blinked, the wheels in his head turning. There was no question to it: He wanted to go with Miriallia. But then there was another thing to it.

_Does Miriallia want me along? Will she be willing to take that risk in bringing along a Coordinator to Orb with her? _

Whenever Dearka would ride a mobile suit, or embark on missions, one thing he could commend him for is the confidence he had that he will – no questions asked – succeed. That was Dearka Elthman, one of the top soldiers in ZAFT. And he took pride in that confidence, that mind-set that whatever he'd do, he'd do it right.

But in all his sixteen years living, he had never met anyone who could make him so unsure of what he was going to say or do...

_Miriallia..._

He was always tongue-tied when it came to her... More so when they became a couple. And he was never sure of what he was going to say to her. He did not now how she takes his behavior, but as much as he tries to act cool and lax around her, the more he ends up screwing it.

Yzak kicked the headrest again, and Dearka's head bounced on it once more, an "argh!" escaping his throat. "Talk to her later. She'll say yes."

Athrun nodded. "I'll handle Cagalli. I may be able to convince her that you'll stay out of trouble and not risk her political status."

Yzak snorted while laughing, making a sound that resembled that of a piglet with a tummy ache.

Dearka did not like that. "Oh, yeah Zala? How are you going to convince her? With your tongue?"

Yzak laughed even more.

Athrun scowled. "And I suppose you can do better with Milly? When your brain always seems to want to go on three-hour vacations whenever you're anywhere within a six-foot radius near Miriallia?"

Yzak was elated. He was now sitting quietly in the back, watching the small word-battle between the two boys.

Dearka opened his mouth to say something, but found out that he did not have anything smart to say. It was true. And he was stumped. He sighed and slumped against the door. "Fine. Please convince Cagalli. I... I can't stay here without Miriallia. It's pointless..."

"I know just how you feel, man. Don't worry. I'll see what I can do."

"Thank you."

Yzak snickered from where he sat. "One problem, though."

"What?"

"Athrun said Miriallia has a family to come home to, right?"

Dearka swallowed hard, suddenly feeling faint. Yzak did not have to go on.

But he did. "So you're going to meet the parents then?"

_Oh, God... Spare me... _

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Miriallia blinked several times before finally digesting what Cagalli had said to her. They were sitting on the couch, heads bent low together, talking about tomorrow evening's departure. Darned it all. It seemed like everyone is leaving Abashiri out of short notice.

She nodded her orange-brown head and sighed. "I will come with you. Yes, I want to see my parents terribly, but I know it's hard to deal with what you're about to face, Cagalli. And although I know Athrun will be there with you, you will still need a friend you can turn to."

A smile tugged the corner of the princess' lips as she backed off and leaned comfortably on the couch. "Your presence is most definitely appreciated, Milly."

Miriallia smiled. She had been in constant contact with her parents ever since they arrived in Japan, and she couldn't wait to tell them that she was finally coming home. Her mom and dad... She missed them so much... How she wanted to come home to them...

_There better be an apple pie waiting for me, mom._

She was about to embark on a pleasure cruise down memory lane when Cagalli suddenly interrupted her thoughts.

"Say, Milly?"

"Yes?"

The princess wrung her hands together, obviously hesitating a bit before continuing. "What about Dearka?"

And they fell into an uncomfortable silence.

_What about Dearka? _

Milly ran a hand though her hair, trying to smooth out the knots and tangles. It had grown unmanageably long for the past months... She sighed as she turned to her friend. "Cagalli? You know how I feel for him, don't you?"

The blonde-haired girl nodded in understanding.

"I can't take him along, can I?"

Cagalli paused, then tilted her head to the right. "That's not for me to say... Wouldn't you like him to be there?"

"In a place where he could get stoned to death for simply being there? I don't think he'd like that."

"How can you be sure?"

"Cagalli, like you said. Bringing Athrun along is an enough risk... and I know that it's totally unfair for you to worry about me if I bring him along."

Cagalli shrugged. "Then bring him along. I don't mind."

Milly guffawed. "As if he'd like to go through all that trouble for me..."

"Shows how much you know."

That made her smile. She had seen Dearka do things for her that no one normally would. Things that she did not expect him to do at all, being who he is.

_Or who he was..._

The very first time she had seen him, she thought he was a bad person. But then again, she was depressed then, and very bitter. Who'd have thought that the granddaddy of all worst first meetings could blossom into something this beautiful...

But there were other things she had to think about. Raising her eyes to her friend, she asked, "Cagalli? What about Lacus and Kira? Don't tell me you're leaving them behind."

They both jumped when someone suddenly spoke from somewhere behind them.

"That's exactly what I wanted to know," Lacus said as she sleepily made her way out of Sai's room, yawning widely and slumping on the backrest of the couch.

Cagalli tugged at the songstress' hair lightly. "I'm not leaving you behind, Lacus. But I can't bring you all to Orb when it's all screwed up as it is. You do understand that, right?"

Lacus nodded, her big blue eyes closing drowsily. "I know Cagalli."

"That leads me to another thing I want to ask of you."

"What's that?"

Cagalli hesitated, then continued. "Lacus, I know that Kira did a lot of things that must have hurt you really badly, but I'm asking you this as a friend, okay? Please keep him out of trouble while I'm away. I will come for you guys when everything is stable in Orb..."

Milly watched Lacus' face scrunch up in thought, obviously trying to come up with a decision about the request. In the end, she nodded her head, opening her eyes, which, Milly saw, were now alert. "I'll try. But please don't expect too much from me..."

But apparently, that answer didn't satisfy Cagalli. She turned to the songstress with her trademark "what-the-heck-is-going-on" look. "Okay. Let me get this clear. Are you, by any chance, completely over Kira?"

Miriallia waited in silence for the answer to that question. She had asked Lacus that same question earlier and she didn't actually answer it straight out.

In all honesty, she could not picture Kira without Lacus, and of course the other way around. And although she could completely understand her feelings, she still did not understand why Lacus still rejected Kira every time he'd try to approach her. It simply was not at all Lacus-like to be that unforgiving...

Lacus shook her head slowly, her pink ponytail swishing down her back. "No, Cagalli."

"Then why are you making this harder for you and him?"

Lacus eyebrows knitted thoughtfully, and she sighed. "I'm scared, Cagalli. Or maybe I'm angry. Or maybe I'm just making him suffer even more. I don't know. There could be a hundred million reasons why I can't seem to get to talk to Kira about what happened."

With this, Cagalli started to whine. "But Lacus! Haven't you seen Kira at all? He's been really down... just because you won't talk to him..."

This comment, however, made Lacus tighten her mouth. "I know that... But Cagalli? What about me? What about what I feel? I'm not saying I'm not feeling bad when I see him like that. Coz I do... but somehow, I just can't bring myself to talk to him. At least not yet..." She tried to search for a better explanation for her obvious behavior towards Kira, but apparently found nothing.

Miriallia jumped in to her rescue. "I know just how you feel, Lacus. Sometimes, we do things even though we don't have a concrete reason for it. But we do it because we find a certain comfort in it. If it makes you feel better not talking to him for the while, then don't talk to him."

Lacus breathed a sigh of relief, and threw Miriallia a grateful look.

"But – "Cagalli tried to say.

Milly shot her a look that made her hesitate, but she nodded and kept quiet anyway.

Lacus hugged Cagalli's neck from behind and leaned her chin on top of her head. "But that doesn't mean I'm completely over him. I... love Kira... and... well, I guess I'm just taking a breather."

Cagalli laughed. "Well, whatever you do, just stay away from Yalin, you hear?"

Miriallia wrinkled her nose at the memory of the utterly good-looking and equally annoying guy, Yalin Faraon... Ugh! In normal circumstances, Milly would have thought him a swell guy, what with his sensitivity, politeness, and not to mention his really pleasant-looking features. That was from an unbiased point of view of course... Too bad she was biased. No one was going to make a move on her friend if his name isn't Kira Yamato.

"I'll be sad, when you and Milly leave me here. Promise to call me every night?"

Cagalli looked up at Lacus, whose chin was still propped on her hair. "I'll make sure of it. But will you be all right in the dorm by yourself?"

"I will. I'm used to it." The songstress took a seat next to Milly and tucked her legs under her.

Although it still didn't sit well with Milly that Lacus will have to be left alone in the dorm by herself, she had other things to worry about. She turned to Cagalli. "What are we going to do with the dolls?"

Cagalli shrugged as she stretched her arms over her head. "I'm returning Cathrun tomorrow... It's kind of sad, huh? I couldn't believe I'd get so attached to her so quickly."

Milly sighed too. "I guess I'm returning Stephanie back, too, huh?"

Lacus leaned back her head and started to examine the ceiling. "So. Are you really taking Dearka with you?"

With that, Milly almost fell off her seat. She had almost forgotten about that. "If he'd like to..."

The songstress leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees and propping her chin on her palm. "I suggest you take him along. It won't be long until he goes back to PLANT..."

Milly nodded. This fact was not something new to her. Dearka had told her while they were doing the dishes. "I know... He said that when everything is ironed out with the Council, Yzak will be calling him back."

Lacus nodded solemnly. "That's how it is, when you're a soldier. I say you take him with you, while you still can."

Milly swallowed hard. "What if he doesn't want to go?"

With this, both her friends burst out laughing.

"As if!" Cagalli retorted, rolling her eyes.

"Milly, Dearka will follow you to the ends of the earth and back if he has to!" Lacus pointed out.

The comment made her smile, but just barely. _Follow me to the ends of the earth and back... but in the end, he'll go back to PLANT anyway... _

She tried to cheer up. "To the ends of the earth Dearka and I go, then!" she exclaimed.

_And maybe stay there for the rest of our lives..._

_God, why do people have to say goodbye...?_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

The Abashiri Orphanage could be found a few hundred feet behind the studio. It was a small, square two-storey building that was built facing the east. There were approximately fifty children in the vicinity, all of which ranging from three to five years old, majority of which came from Orb. Eiko was brought there from the shelters in Orb along with a near dozen kids who had lost their parents in the ZAFT attack. Having been three or so months in the island, all of them had adjusted to the bitter reality that they were now alone in the world.

The kindly caretaker of the orphaned kids was a kindly middle-aged woman named Nancy Lao. And her sweet smile was what welcomed Kira when he knocked on the door of the Orphanage.

"She seems to have grown fond of you, Kira," said the lady as the Freedom pilot stepped into the lobby of the building, little Eiko in his arms.

Kira set the girl down, who immediately bulleted to the other kids who were all sprawled on the floor, each armed with a crayon and a coloring book. "It's my fault, Ms. Lao. I forgot I've promised them I'd read them a story."

The lady shook her head as she led Kira inside and closed the door behind them. "You do know that you won't be getting anything out of this, young man... All I can give you are cookies and milk...'

Kira chuckled softly. Ms. Lao had been saying that to him for the last few days he's been stopping by to help around. "I live for cookies and milk."

This made the lady smile. For someone who was evidently a looker when she was young, Kira had often wondered why she never married. "Cookies and milk it is then." And she hurried away to the kitchen.

Having been left alone, he turned to the children. He found out that every single pair of big, pleading eyes were already looking at him, each holding a book they wanted him to read.

He clapped his hands together. "Okay. So what will it be tonight?"

The ten odd kids erupted in joyous cheer at the sight of their storyteller ready to accept suggestions on tonight's session. Little feet scuttled their way to him, crowding near his legs, each raising a book over his or her head.

"Read this, big brother Kira!" Eiko yelled as she raised the book about Cinderella. She was knocked on away by this blonde boy Kira had recognized as Makoto.

"No! Read this!" Makoto shouted over the squeals of excited kids as he waved around a book that was entitled Space Monkeys.

Karen, a blue-black haired three year old, in turn pushed him aside. "No one wants to hear about your dinky monkeys from space, Makoto!" She then flagged her book that read Mrs. Toad Goes Shopping in the air.

And everyone went wild!

Kira started to back off, not really knowing what to do. If he picked one book, he knew things were going to get ugly... But right now he knew exactly what to do...

Something the Government in Hokkaido should have done a long time ago...

Thinking fast, he clapped his hands again to calm the very demanding crowd. "Hey everyone! I have an idea!"

And of course, because everyone listened to 'big brother' Kira because he was so cool and so tall (as compared to the little tikes), they fell silent, waiting for 'big brother' Kira's great idea.

Kira sighed and settled on the cushion on the padded floor. "Everyone sit around in a circle - no pushing now – and listen what big brother Kira has to say."

Everyone did so, aiming to please 'big brother' Kira, because he was so cool and so tall.

"I have my own story to tell. And it's a good story."

"Does it have princes and princesses?" asked Eiko, who was sitting directly in front of him.

Kira thought for a moment. _Well, I guess I can improvise... _He turned to the girl. "Why, yes. It does."

"What about evil wizards and demons?" Makoto screamed over the silence.

Kira nodded. "You're in luck. There are a lot evil wizards and demons in this story."

"Tell us the story! Tell us the story!" said a very hyper Michael as he squirmed in his seat.

"All right, but be sure to listen, because I am going to ask you a lot of questions about it when I'm done."

And everyone sat still as 'big brother' Kira began.

"Once upon a time, there were two kingdoms that were at war. They've been at war for so long that some people have actually forgotten why and how it started. But since I'm the story teller, I know how it started really. It started because each side was afraid to die, and started to think that in order to live, the other must die. They thought that if they didn't kill those in the other kingdom, _they _will be killed. Each was insecure of their life that they started to fight each other."

"What're the names of the kingdoms?' asked Karen.

"Shhh! Let big brother Kira continue!"

"I don't want to miss anything because big brother Kira is asking questions later! I have to know!"

Kira laughed and continued. "Calm down, you two. The name of the kingdoms are PLANT and Earth..."

"Earth! That's the name of our planet, right?" Eiko squeaked.

The Freedom pilot smiled as he realized none had reacted to the name PLANT. He feigned surprise. "Why, yes! It is! Well, anyway, our story focuses on the main character, who is a knight for the kingdom of Earth."

"What's his name?"

"Err... Sir Kira."

"That's your name!" came a squeal from almost everyone.

"Why, what a coincidence! Well, you see, Sir Kira never really liked the war. He hated it so much because he couldn't see his best friend, who was a knight in the kingdom of PLANT."

"What's his best friend's name?"

"Err.. Sir Athrun."

"Yay!"

"Anyway, the war went on for many months, until a princess from PLANT decided that the war had to end, and that there are other means to end the war than kill each other off."

"What's the name of the princess?"

Kira paused, then smiled sadly. "Princess Lacus..."

"Princess Lacus! I have to remember that for the questions later..."

"So the gallant Princess Lacus took all her supporters and formed an alliance - "

Eiko raised her hand into the air. "Brother Kira! What's an alliance...?"

Kira turned to her patiently. "They formed a group, Eiko. And that group wanted to end the war without having to kill many people. Sir Kira, seeing this, joined their group along with Sir Athrun. Now who's Sir Athrun again?"

"Sir Kira's best friend!" ten or so little voices shouted loudly.

"My, you're listening! Okay, let's go on. Now that Sir Kira and Sir Athrun were together, they were invincible. You see, they were the strongest knights in all the land! Now, joined by the strong and courageous Princess Cagalli from the royal house of Attha in the Kingdom of Earth, they try to bridge the gap between the two kingdoms, but it was such a hard feat to do."

"Why?"

"Well, both kingdoms are to blame actually. For PLANT, it's because of the evil wizard, La Cruset and the evil king, Partick! And on Earth, it's because of the evil wizard Azrael. They refused to listen to reason, and so the war got even more out of hand."

By this time, none of the children wanted to interrupt him while he talked. Everyone seemed to be hanging onto his every word, hardly breathing or moving.

"Everything got so out of hand, that each kingdom started to take out their secret weapons! Each weapon was designed to destroy the other side to kingdom come!"

With this, Eiko began to cry. "That's bad! I don't want anyone to die! I don't like this story! I want to hear about princesses and princes! Waaaah!"

Kira started to panic. In a hurry, he gathered the little girl in his arms and started to rock her back and forth. "But you see, there are princesses and princes here, too!"

"No, there aren't! They're gonna kill each other off now!"

Kira laughed. "Well, if you're going to cry, then you wouldn't hear of their story."

Eiko started to calm down. "Wha- what do you mean?"

"Well, you see, while they were planning to stop the war, Sir Athrun fell in love with Princess Cagalli. They actually plan to get married after the war."

Eiko sniffed. "What about Sir Kira? Did he fall in love with Princess Lacus?"

Kira blinked, and found out that he did not have anything to say. Recovering quickly, he nodded. "Yes... yes he did. But he didn't realize that he was so madly in love with her until it was too late..."

Eiko sniffed again. "What do you mean?"

Kira sighed. "Well, you see, I used – I mean Sir Kira used to care for this girl... because he felt like he owed her a lot... but she died in the war because he wasn't strong enough to protect her. And so Sir Kira cried and cried and cried all day and all night that he didn't even realize that Princess Lacus was the right one for him."

Eiko frowned. "Sir Kira is _stew-pid_!"

Kira nodded silently. "Yes he is. Very much. And if I don't tell the rest of the story, you wouldn't know what happened to them all..."

Eiko stared up at him, then finally nodded. "Okay. So long as nobody dies..."

Kira smiled sadly. "I'll try." Of course, he could always improvise... And so he went on. "Well, the secret weapons were already aimed at each other's kingdom, and the evil wizards already had their hands on the trigger, Sir Kira and Sir Athrun, together with their friends, did everything in their power to stop them from firing. It was a hard battle, but because they were fighting for what's right, and because they had each other, they succeeded. Sir Athrun had been victorious, with the help of Princess Cagalli, in vanquishing the evil King Patrick, thus lifting the evil spell he had on the kingdom of PLANT. Sir Kira was successful also in defeating the wizard La Cruset, while his friends helped in defeating the wizard Azrael."

Eiko's lower lip quivered. "Did... did they die...?"

"Err... no. They were sent to... err... a place where they could become better people... uuh... and have a shot at being good, and something like that..."

This made the girl smile.

Kira breathed a sigh of relief. "And so the war ended and there is peace between the two kingdoms... "

Kira looked at the kids expectantly. No one moved. No one even blinked.

The Freedom pilot bit his lip, then added uncertainly, "And they lived happily ever after."

The kids burst into applause.

Until Karen and Eiko shrieked.

"Wait! It can't be over yet! What happened to Sir Kira and Princess Lacus and Sir Athrun and Princess Cagalli?" demanded Karen.

Kira laughed. "Princess Cagalli and Sir Athrun rode off into the sunset on their white horse and got married and lived happily ever after."

"And Sir Kira and Princess Cagalli?"

That stumped Kira hard. _What did happen to Kira and Lacus? What will happen to them???_

He shook his head. "I'll tell you the story some other time... It's getting late."

"Aaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwww!!!" came loud protests from the group.

Luckily, Ms. Lao came to the rescue, in her hand a tray of cookies and a glass of milk. "Stop harassing Kira, you guys. Go to your rooms."

"Aaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwww!!!"

Ms. Lao glared at them, and Kira watched as their smiles greasily slid off their little pudgy faces.

Kira set Eiko down and the little girl wiped at her still tear-stained face. "Will you be coming back tomorrow?"

The Freedom pilot kneeled in front of her, placing a hand on her puny shoulders. "I'll try. And maybe by then, I'd be able to tell you guys what happened to Princess Lacus and Sir Kira, all right?"

This made all the children happy enough, and so obediently filed out of the room, after each saying bye-bye to 'big brother' Kira, who was so cool and so tall.

Ms. Lao turned to him then, handing him the tray. "That was a nice story. I didn't know that was what happened before the cease-fire..."

That made Kira blink. "You... knew what I was talking about, didn't you?"

The kind old lady chuckled as she started to gather the coloring books the children had abandoned in the floor. "You know, my fiancé was in the service..."

And Kira stiffened. He was afraid to ask, but he did anyway. "What happened?"

"He was stationed on the moon base. I was informed two days later that the base had been completely destroyed. No one survived..."

"I'm sorry."

Strong, brave Ms. Lao... Kira didn't know what to say, except to bow his head and apologize again.

This made the lady laugh as she plucked a cookie from the tray. "My dear's life was not wasted. We had gained peace. And that's what's important. All we have to do now, Kira, is to rebuild our lives from what we have left, to treasure the people the war had spared for us. That's why I chose to take care of these kids. They are what we have left. They're really a pain, but they're all I've got."

At that, something snapped in Kira that somehow almost made him drop the tray of cookies and milk.

... _to treasure the people the war had spared for us..._

_They're really a pain, but they're all I've got..._

Kira didn't even bother to waste any time. He gently pushed the tray back to the lady and bowed in a apology. "Thank you, Ms. Lao, but right now, I really have to go."

She was puzzled. "Why? What about the cookies?"

"I'm sorry. But I still have to know what happens to the Princess and the knight..."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Yzak stared straight ahead, trying to avoid Athrun and Dearka's gaze as he hauled his luggage out of the trunk and set it slowly on the floor of the domestic departures area in Memambetsu airport. Well, this is it. He was almost home... home to PLANT. Home to his mother. And everything was going to be fine. He didn't have to think about nonsensical things like school... or who gets to use the bathroom first in the morning... or... or...

_Kari..._

Shaking the blasted name out of his brain, he looked up and found Athrun smiling at him.

Yzak cringed inwardly. "Please say you're not going to give me a hug."

Athrun laughed, and instead, made a familiar gesture with his right hand. _A ZAFT salute. _"Take care up there, Yzak. We will meet again. Maybe for a game of volleyball... or maybe with a few bottles of beer."

Yzak felt something unfamiliarly fuzzy deep down in his gut. He squashed the feeling quickly, and saluted back. At least it wasn't a hug. "Take care, Zala. Take care of Cagalli."

"You don't have to tell me twice."

Yzak turned to Dearka, who was leaning on the hood of the car, arms crossed in front of his chest. "You. Take care. Be good to Milly."

The tan boy merely turned away, looking out into the airport sky that diminished every single star out of sight because of the too bright lights.

Yzak sighed silently, then nudged him on the shoulder. "I'll be seeing you soon enough. Don't you go AWOL on me, all right?"

This made the guy turn to him, his dark face unseen in the shadows cast by the lights behind him. "I know, Yzak. You don't have to rub it in my face."

Yzak scowled. "I'm not rubbing it in your face, Elthman. I just don't want you to get too acquainted with your life here. Because it isn't your life. It can't possibly be that way."

Dearka smirked. "I know, Yzak." He reached out a hand to him. "Take care, man."

The Duel pilot looked at his hand, then after a while of staring, he took it reluctantly, shaking it with a mean grip. "You, too."

After a final nod to Athrun, he rolled his bag behind him as he made his way inside the airport, not bothering to look back. Daring himself not to...

Squashing the unwelcome memory of solemn green eyes and three-studded earlobes into oblivion, he decided to concentrate in looking for Japan Air Travels, where he had reserved a domestic flight two days ago. He tried to distract himself with the lines in the poem he liked in the book Lacus had given him.

Only it was a bad idea... That poem reminded him of Kari... which was probably why he liked it so much. She was so beautiful, but reminded him of so many things that he shouldn't be remembering...

_Flowers, beautiful as you are, why is death so near you?_

_Kari, beautiful as you are... you're bound to give me heartaches..._

_Dammit...!_

Just as he crossed the brightly-lit lobby of the departure area, he could not help but feel utterly lonely. There were a number of people gathering around him, waiting for connecting flights and the like. Unconsciously, he found himself looking over his shoulder to where he had left Athrun and Dearka, only to discover that he could not see them anymore, due to the number of anxious passengers crowding the entrance door.

Sighing, and pretty much convincing himself that the fact that he did not look back was because he wanted to see their faces for one last time, he trudged on forward in his attempt to locate his Airline Terminal in the very long line of Airline Terminals there. Suddenly feeling small and insignificant, he tried to shy away from the crowds of people. But no matter how he tried to not think about it, he just couldn't see the point in lying to himself: He was really sad that he was leaving...

_I wish I could have tried to enjoy everything to the fullest while I still could..._

Yes. To Yzak, it was the worst feeling ever... Regret...

And for once in his stay in Hokkaido, he finally let his chain of thought zigzag through his brain like a snake...

_The Summer Festivals are on Monday... I really did want to see the fireworks display..._

_I had wanted to try out the fish game, too..._

_Wonder if Kira and Lacus would ever hook up again? Is Yalin really serious in pursuing her?_

_Wonder if Dearka'd get to put a cork in his ears to keep his brain from leaking out every time he's around Milly?_

_I wonder how winter in Abashiri looks like..._

_Do they celebrate Chistmas here, too?_

_I wonder where Kari is right now?_

Yzak snapped out of his reverie as the last thought that invaded his mind zapped him like an electric eel. Where had that come from? Why did he suddenly think of Kari?

He sighed as he gripped his bag tighter, pulling it behind him roughly. He knew that he should not be thinking about things like that... It would prove to be useless to him anyway... But he found out that he couldn't help it. Telling himself that since he was going home anyway, he'd let himself enjoy the memories.

_But I wonder what she's really doing right now... She's probably sleeping. She must have been tired the whole day. Man, I wish I had said goodbye to her before I left. Damn. No point in feeling regrets, Jule. Milly wanted you to talk to her but you said no, so tough luck._

Glancing at his wristwatch, he discovered he had but five minutes to get that ticket and board the plane. Five minutes. He could miss his flight if he didn't hurry... Surprisingly, he did not seem to care. Looking around, he saw a payphone and immediately hurried to it. Leaning his bag to his leg, he tried to fish a few coins out of his pocket and was shocked when his fingers got tangled to smooth, silky strands of strawberry blonde hair... Withdrawing his hand back, raising the locks to his face, he suddenly felt melancholic. Grunting in annoyance at the feelings overwhelming him, he stuffed the locks back where he got them, and searched his other pocket for a few yen. Finding some coins, he dropped then down the payphone and picked up the receiver. After that, he raised his left palm to his face where tiny eleven-digit numbers were messily scrawled on his skin. The sweat had smudged the ink of the blue ballpoint pen that Miriallia had used to write it.

_"This is Kari's cell phone number. I asked her to give it to me because of the Summer Festival follow-ups. I am giving this to you just in case you change your mind and want to say goodbye to her..." _Miriallia's voice echoed through his mind as she scribbled the numbers on his palm right before he left the dorm.

Yzak groaned inwardly as he slowly punched in the numbers with shaky fingers. _Five minutes. Just five minutes of saying hello, then goodbye... and then I'll hang up..._

His heart jumped to his throat as he heard the phone ring. Once...

_What do I say to her? _

Twice...

_What will she say to me?_

Thrice...

_Oh, God..._

Just then, his enhanced hearing made his ears twitch at a sound that almost made his heart burst out of his chest. A small ringing sound...somewhere down the hall... Maybe it was just him, or maybe wishful thinking... but something drew him towards it...

His hands automatically opened and the receiver plummeted down, catching the cord and dangling a few feet from the floor. Leaving his baggage by the booth, he found his feet curiously moving on its own down the hall, towards the ringing sound...

Down the hall...

To the left...

Dodging people left and right...

Following the sound of ringing...

Until he found something...

It was an airline ticket terminal...

With a huge Japan Air Travels plastered behind it.

And on the floor, right next to the counter, her head – her beautiful head – buried to her knees, her bare arms wrapped around her legs, and a ringing cell phone dangling in her small hand, was the phantom that had been haunting his dreams for more than two nights now....

Yzak could swear the world tilted dangerously to the right at the mere sight of her. She was so small, curled up like that. What was she doing here? Was she waiting for him...?

_That couldn't be...._

_Right?_

Taking a tentative step towards her, he swallowed nervously. Maybe it was someone else... But no... He would know who it was... And this was definitely...

"Kari," he spoke, his voice so raspy that he did not even recognize it himself.

And as if in slow motion, she raised her pretty solemn face to meet his. And at the sight of those eyes, he knew he couldn't possibly be wrong.

"It _is _you," Yzak breathed.

She blinked a few times, before finally her lips broke into her silent smile. She looked at her ringing cell phone, then back at him. "I thought you had left... It's already nine fifteen..."

Yzak was puzzled. "What?" He glanced at his watch. Staring at it in disbelief, he gasped. The blasted thing had stopped! **_He had missed his flight by forty-five minutes!!!_** "Dammit!" He cursed, slamming his fist on the nearest wall. The person behind the counter jumped at his action. "_Don't tell me I've been running around for almost an hour! God!"_

Kari slowly got up to her feet as her phone finally stopped ringing. Brushing the bottom of her jeans calmly, as she usually does, she turned to him with the widest smile he had ever seen on her face. "Welcome home, Yzak."

The Duel pilot's face reddened as she suddenly touched his cheek again with her unnaturally cool hands. He had been longing for her touch for the last two nights, wondering if it would feel the same way it did under the rain. He found out that it wasn't.

It was better than that...

No longer trying to control himself, he slowly raised his hand to the hand touching his cheek, gently grasping her slender fingers with his. "What are you doing here?"

"I came here to stop you from leaving."

Again, his heart skipped a beat. _She came to stop me from leaving! She doesn't want me to go! She cares for me! _"Why?" He asked. And he held his breath for the answer...

_Because I love you, Yzak... And I don't want you to go... Stay here with me instead..._

She pulled her hand from his grasp. "You obviously had been careless again, and you didn't bother to read your mother's latest mail. Apparently, things aren't going according to plan, and these people she had termed as Zala supporters are creating disturbances in the PLANTs. The position in the council your mother was eyeing for you is being hovered upon by these people, or so that's what I understood out of it... I really don't know. She wants you to stay here for the meantime."

Yzak's knees almost gave way at the straightforwardness of her response. So it had nothing to do with her feelings for him at all, then. He was about to feel bad about it, actually, when suddenly, something occurred to him. Narrowing his eyes suspiciously at her, he snarled. "You've been into my account again, haven't you? _HAVEN'T YOU!_"

Kari shrugged her shoulders serenely. "You didn't change the password. I couldn't help myself..."

By the time she had finished with her very short explanation, Yzak was already fuming. "Kari! That's personal property!"

She shrugged again, quite indifferently this time. "I know."

Falling into silent fury, Yzak started to tremble.

Kari tilted her head to the right, then examined him with somehow uncharacteristically naughty eyes. "I was thinking about you, hoping that you wouldn't leave..."

Yzak turned away from her, once again raising his barriers. "So you do it again. Get into my account."

She smiled. "I was happy to know that you didn't have to go back to PLANT. At least not yet. I rushed here as fast as I could, hoping that I would make it before you left, because I was afraid you'd be in danger if you went back. But I came here fifteen minutes too late... and I had thought you already left..." She sighed, clasping her hands in front of her stomach, her cell phone dangling by her left hand. "I am glad I was not too late."

The next thing that Yzak realized was that he could not stay mad at her at all, that in normal circumstances, had he discovered someone trying to snoop in his private property, he would have snapped that person in two! He turned away, avoiding her gaze. "I tried to call you to say goodbye, thinking that I had five minutes left before boarding time. My watch... stopped..."

"And you're feeling really stupid right now, aren't you?"

"It wouldn't help if I lied, huh?"

She shook his head.

Yzak let out a frustrated breath and hung his head. "I feel really stupid right now, yeah."

"Don't feel too bad about it. I promise I won't tell." She stuck out her pinky finger, nodding at him playfully. "It'll be our little secret."

Yzak raised his head once again, stared at her pinky finger, then helplessly yielded, twining his own pinky finger with hers. "Fine. Whatever," he said, rolling his eyes.

She released after a second, then nodded to the hall. "Come on. Let's go. Sai is waiting for us outside. He accompanied me here, since Kira didn't want me to go alone."

"Oh? Kira huh? He never even showed up for my party to say goodbye..."

And the two made their way back to the phone booth where Yzak had abandoned his luggage, neither talking nor looking at each other, both expecting a comfy ride in their car all the way back to Abashiri.

Little did they know that Sai had caught up with Athrun and Dearka in the parking lot of the airport. Knowing that Kari and Yzak were bound to meet anyway, they were now on their way back to Abashiri, just the three of them, leaving Yzak with Kari to take a bus back by themselves.

Dearka knew that Yzak, of course, was bound to kill them when he found out that they set him up. But right now, they didn't care. What with Yzak staying after all, everything was starting to look up.

Except when Yzak finally did find out that he had to travel back with a fifteen-kilo luggage in a public bus, with the girl he loved and hated both at the same time...

Life was cruel...

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_**Yuugiri: Well, we can't always have a fight scene in every single chapter, huh? LOL! Sorry if you don't like this chapter. It really isn't my favorite chapter either. So I am welcoming anything that you wish to throw at me. I wouldn't mind. Really. (stands perfectly still)**_

_**For those who are curious, the next chapter will mostly be happening in Orb. (Yes, they will be splitting up.) Well, that's the only preview I can give you for then next chap...**_

_**Oh, and by the way... I want to warn you... I've been trying to draw out the possible endings of this story. (Not that it'll be ending pretty soon, coz it's not ending yet...) and with the way my mind is working right now, please do not get too attached to Kari... I'm not saying it'll be a bad ending, okay? But just in case... please do not get too attached.**_

_**Anyways, please leave a review. **_


	23. Phase 23: Circumstances

_**Yuugiri: Hello! Thanks again for the reviews! And thank you for the reviews about Orb's hatred against the Coordinators. I am happy that you spotted that, but trust me, people. Let the story answer that for you. It's a part of the plot, since I've been boggled by that review if this story will have its own ending, or will it link to GSD. So I'm trying to swerve things towards that ending that I want to come up with. **_

_**Oh, well. Please read on. **_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed. I also do not know how the Haww family really was in the series, so anything that happens in this chapter regarding Milly's parents, I made all of that up. **_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_**July 17, AW :: evening**_

The moment the shuttle landed in Abashiri to pick up the people who will be going back to Orb, Kisaka did not waste any time in handing Cagalli the work. But not after throwing uncertain stares at Dearka and Athrun, who were really not expected to be accompanying them for this trip. This made the man quite uncomfortable and had confronted the princess immediately when they were loading up their luggage.

"_The very first time the EA and ZAFT actually got this country involved was when ZAFT infiltrated Heliopolis to obtain the five mobile suits of the Alliance. Orb and ZAFT had a treaty to leave the nation alone. But regardless of the reminder, they chose to continue with orders. That is not something the people in Orb could forget. So you could probably see where the distrust comes from. I'm not saying that I'm questioning you, Cagalli, but don't you think bringing them along is a bad idea?" _

"_I'm not saying it's the best idea, but they wanted to come, so it's not for me to say no."_

"_Cagalli, I don't think you're getting the point here. I asked you to come and try to iron out the wrinkles in this setting, not to heighten it more."_

"_Kisaka, I'm not heightening it more. Just leave me alone for a moment and let me think."_

Well, at least those were the first words between them. Cagalli knew of that day when Orb was forcibly involved in the war. She had been there to begin with, but did not know the details to it. The first thing she had to do was find out what fuels the distrust in her country. She was convinced there had to be something behind it.

Miriallia, Dearka, Athrun, Sai and Kazui were more than willing to help. Apparently, all of them were coincidentally present when ZAFT came in for the steal; Athrun and Dearka being two of the number of Coordinators sent for the retrieval. Another one of them, in fact, was Yzak. But then Cagalli started to wonder why the citizens of Orb hated Coordinators, when in fact the EA had something to do with it as well...

Murrue, who had sent her own report with Kisaka's, tried to explain this, for she, too, was there in Heliopolis.

_"I'm not sure if you already know this information, as I understand you were presently in one of the evacuation shelters nearby. The five newly developed Mobile Suits being in that space colony was supposed to be a secret, and so I, being in the EA, tried to keep it one. Save Kira, Kazui, Sai and Miriallia, no civilian knew of that military secret. So technically, all throughout the war, the only thing the civilians who were able to escape Heliopolis knew was that ZAFT attacked, and Orb as forcibly dragged into the war. You can't blame them. They will believe what they have experienced."_

_But still, was it enough? _She thought to herself. Cagalli scratched her head in frustration as she shifted her gaze from the window to Athrun, whose eyes were closed, but Cagalli knew more than anything that he was not asleep. Even with a wide-brimmed hat pulled low over his face, she could still see that he was deep in thought, and in order to avoid engaging into a conversation, he was pretending to nap. Typical, typical Athrun. Putting the thought aside, she looked down at the thick notepad in her hand and sighed. These were the projects the council had proposed. One of them was the request to rebuild Heliopolis. Cagalli was more than willing to approve that proposal. If only it were that easy. Now that she was on her way back, she was given the task to juggle the funds. Or at least what's left of it. As far as she could tell, their funds were dwindling flimsily. But that was because the reconstructions in the country itself were sixty-three percent complete.

That was the only good news she had received so far.

Milly, who was sitting across from her, nudged her foot with hers. "Are you all right?"

Cagalli raised her eyes to her friend and blinked. "Huh?"

"You look… stoned. What are those you're reading?"

Hastily, the princess stuffed the notepad into the equally thick envelope on her lap, and then smiled at her friend. "Nothing. It's nothing." Kisaka did not need to tell her that even though she had friends, she was still going to be handling matters that did not and could not be known to anyone that did not directly concern the nation politically.

_It's like carrying an entire country on your shoulders… whoopee…_

Milly, being really the understanding girl that she is, left her alone, and instead turned to the very pale-looking Dearka sitting next to her. The Buster pilot did not look at all that well. Of course aside from the fact that he hadn't said anything for the last hour or so, the tension was clearly visible in the way he sat; rigid and uneasy, twiddling his thumbs absently as he looked out the window with a blank stare. Something told her that it had nothing to do with Miriallia this time. It had something to do with something else...

As Cagalli watched the orange-brown haired girl bend forward to touch her boyfriend's hand, Dearka jumped, startled, and he looked down at her in confusion. Thinking that she did not have anything to do with whatever they were going to talk about, she turned away and continued to stare out into the clouds. There really isn't much to see, though. It was seven in the evening, and except for the small dots of stars in the horizon, it was pretty much a boring sight. And she found her thoughts wandering, back early in the morning when she had talked to Kira.

Her _younger_ brother was very perky then, despite the fact that Lacus still wouldn't talk to him. Cagalli had narrowed her eyes at him suspiciously then.

_"You're up to something, aren't you?"_

_"I have no idea what you're talking about. Well, have a safe trip and be sure to call me when you get to Orb." _With that, Kira had kissed her on the cheek, patted her shoulder and hurried off to the bus stop. He didn't even wait for her to leave!

He was definitely up to something… Whatever it was, she was happy that it made her brother finally snap out of his zombie state. He looked happy then. And whatever he was up to, then she was glad about it.

Lacus, on the other hand, was close to tears. She smiled and tried to pretend she was all right, but Cagalli knew she was lonely. The only consolation the princess got was knowing Kari would watch over her while they were away. Lacus had agreed to help the meek girl with her thesis and had suggested for her to move in with her in the dorm for the study. Lacus said she didn't have anything better to do, so she might as well help her. She said that aside from Akira, it would be nice to have someone to talk to during the late hours in the evening.

Cagalli had smiled then and bid Akira goodbye.

When she and Milly went to Mrs. Takano to return their dolls, the teacher had glared at them and shook her head disapprovingly. Cagalli groaned at the memory. The kindly lady was disappointed in them for having to leave in the middle of her program, but there wasn't anything she could do, and so could not help but provide them the dropping forms. However, she said she would momentarily freeze their doll's AI chip if in any case they'd return within two weeks or so to continue that project.

That thought made her love the lady even more. It was as if she was expecting them to come back.

_That wouldn't be such a bad idea at all… I wish I could come back there soon… _

She was snapped out of her thoughts by Athrun's head suddenly bumping against hers. She looked up and saw him staring down at her with those eyes that seem to always make her queasy. "What?" she asked flatly, trying to mask the emotions she felt about his penetrating gaze. She shoved him gently and he grinned lazily.

"You've been awfully silent. Are you okay?"

She tried to brush his concern aside and grabbed a chunk of his blue-black hair, pulling at it gently. "I'm all right. What makes you think something's wrong?"

The Coordinator pried his hair out of her tight grip. "You're quiet. You're never quiet. Not in long trips like this. You usually fool around, and now you're just staring outside."

Cagalli opened her mouth to say something, but before she could do so, Athrun's swift hands darted for the envelope sitting on her lap. Crying out in surprise, the princess wasn't fast enough to snatch it back. "Athrun! Give that back!"

Athrun shook his head, his eyes twinkling naughtily under that hat of his. "You've been reading this over and over again for the past two hours ever since Kisaka gave it to you. You read something you didn't like, am I right?"

A growl rose up Cagalli's throat as she made an attempt to claw the envelope back, but Athrun held it out of her reach. "Zala, if you don't hand me those papers, I will make you hurt so bad you'd hate me!"

This seemed to have no effect on the Justice pilot. "What does it say?"

"Athrun!"

"Cagalli, I'm your bodyguard, remember? You appointed me. I think it's fair for me to know what's going on with the affairs of your life. I've been sitting here, waiting for you to tell me yourself, but you just sit there, saying nothing. What's going on?"

Typical Athrun. Cagalli glowered at him before finally surrendering. At the sight of this, Athrun finally handed over the envelope.

The princess looked from Athrun to the window. "If only I knew, Athrun, I would have told you. But there are a lot of things puzzling me… Don't you think it's weird?"

"The social instability of the country?"

"Well, yeah… Personally, I find it... unnaturally escalated."

The Justice pilot leaned his head back on the headrest, momentarily watching Dearka and Milly talk silently about something that concerned nervous breakdowns and family trees. "Cagalli, you can't blame your people. Those who fled from Heliopolis had that concrete conviction that the reason why Orb got involved in the war in the first place is because of the ZAFT attack.... "

"Which is totally unfair!" Cagalli blurted out. She gripped the armrest tightly, preventing herself from clenching her hands. She tried to avoid that habit altogether. She knew it made Athrun nervous. "Athrun, the EA had as much fault to it, as well as my father!"

This time, her boyfriend stared at her as if she had sprouted horns. "Are you telling me that you'd rather have them mad at both sides? Cagalli, I don't mean to be blunt, but I think things are better off this way than have them blaming everyone outside the country."

Cagalli snorted. "But there is one thing you're not getting. They're not mad at _ZAFT_. They're mad at _Coordinators_. Don't you think that's funny?"

This time, Athrun was the one stumped. Frowning deeply, he started to think. "You're right... It does sound... unnaturally outside the conviction of Orb citizens..."

Cagalli nodded, opening her mouth to say something, but suddenly stopped when Kisaka's face suddenly popped out in the monitor next to her seat. Cagalli couldn't get over the fact how tired the man looked, his dark hair scraggly and very disheveled. He must have had so much trouble while she was away.

"Cagalli, ETA is in two hours. Murrue is waiting with disturbing news."

This made even Dearka's head snap up at the announcement.

Cagalli gritted her teeth. _Why do I have the feeling that I will not enjoy this return to my home?_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0 **_

Yzak jumped as he felt a cool hand touch his bare arm. His own hands darted from the keyboard of the old-fashioned computers in the AU library and whirled around to find himself once again drowning in that set of deep green pools. _Kari._

"Now what do you want?" he grumbled as he tried to iron out the creases on his pretty shaken-up nerves. He did not think it was possible to feel so many contrasting emotions at once. Here he was, happy at seeing her, yet annoyed that she could stare at him so calmly without turning into a basket case.

Kari smiled at him with that trademark smile of hers and settled on the seat next to him, placing that bulky bag of hers by her feet. Yzak stared at the bag, wondering what the heck she was carrying.

As usual, she answered without even being asked. "Books. I rented out a few books before I set for the dorm. And then I saw you were still here. It's late and the library closes in ten minutes. What are you doing here?"

This made Yzak flinch. Looking at the wall clock over the door of the library, then down at his wrist watch, he groaned inwardly when he discovered his watch was running slower by thirty minutes. _I should throw this watch away. This is the second time it's put me in contact with this girl… _Grumbling incoherently, he took off his watch and stuffed it in his pocket. "I didn't notice the time. I was just…" he glared at Kari suspiciously. "… changing my password."

The girl tilted her head to the right, making her hair brush her shoulders gently, exposing the three silver studs in her ears. "A wise decision. Will you be on your way home now? Do you mind if I walk with you?"

This made Yzak irk evidently, eyes widening as he tried to digest what she had just said. "Err… whatever. It's not like I can stop you if you really wanted to come. Now would I?"

She giggled at that, folding her hands neatly on her lap. The Duel pilot looked away, trying to busy himself with shutting down his computer. Kari continued to look at him. "I am kind of happy that I saw you here. I have been trying to catch you all day. But I just couldn't seem to manage."

Yzak swallowed hard. He knew why she never did catch him. It was because he had been giving two-hundred percent of his effort to avoid her. The moment Art of War ended early in the morning, he slipped out of the classroom with the skills of a trained soldier that he was, making sure she did not notice him. Cagalli rescued him when Kari almost got him by the fountain, the princess asking a favor from him to move in with Kira as both of their roommates have decided to go to Orb. He had said yes. He didn't even know why, but he had grown quite fond of the princess of Orb. "Why were you looking for me?" he asked hoarsely, scratching his head with a shaky hand.

"I wanted to give you something."

That made Yzak freeze. "What?"

"This." Kari reached down her bag and withdrew a thin object that she immediately handed over to him. It was a CD.

Gingerly reaching out to take the object in his hands, he flipped it over a few times before returning his stare to Kari's expectant face. "What is it?"

"It's a strategic military game I helped develop. It isn't anything grand, so please don't expect anything... I was just looking for someone to critic it and who else should I ask but the expert? May you do me the favor of testing it for me?"

"Do I have a choice?"

Kari smiled at him sweetly. That alluring smile that he could never say no to. He was the one who didn't give himself a choice. She was simply too hard to disappoint. Groaning inwardly, he slipped the CD in the notepad on top of the CPU. "Fine. Whatever." He got to his feet and stretched. "We should hurry. I'll drop you off to your dorm. Lacus must be worried." Apparently he wasn't the only one who moved in with someone. Kari had volunteered to keep the songstress company in their dorm.

Kari blinked up at him, looking at him with that look that completely made him feel naked. She was _'reading' _him again. He knew it. Nodding finally, she got to her feet and started to bend for her bag. "You are right. We should go."

Yzak watched her struggle with her load, and bit his lip as he started to argue with himself whether or not to help her carry her stuff for her. Normally he would not have cared. But then again, nothing was normal with being around her. Wordlessly grunting, he grabbed the bag's strap, swung it easily over his shoulder and started for the door, ignoring the surprised look on her face. A few seconds later, he heard her follow him hastily.

The halls of AU were deserted, and he could hear his footsteps echo in the hollow insides of the Science Building. Kari, however, did not create so much as a tap with her shoes. _What the heck did they do to your genes, woman?_

Except for that one time when Kira threw a tantrum in the gym, this was the first time Yzak had been in the campus at night, and except for a few janitors he spotted on the adjacent halls, there weren't any people in sight. And because of the stressed emptiness of AU, he suddenly started to feel uncomfortable. Stealing a glance at Kari from the corner of his eye, he found himself grinning in spite of himself. She walked with her hands folded to her stomach, her silky hair swaying at every step. She was so serene… Forcing his eyes to stare straight ahead, he sighed loudly.

This made the girl turn to him questioningly. "Hmm?"

Yzak pretended he did not hear her. She blinked a few times, then returned her gaze forward. The silence was killing him, and the echoes of the _'tap-tap-tap' _of his steps made his nerves tie themselves up in tight knots. Dammit! Why on earth did he stay this late in school anyway?

Well, he knew the answer to that. Being in the frontlines of the war had made him a nervous wreck before, but it was only then did he realize sitting around and waiting for news about the whereabouts of a loved one brought just about as much anxiety. He worried about his mother.

So this was how it felt like to be a civilian. Helpless as you waited for news, whether it be good or bad. He knew that his mother was well, but still the fact that she was there in PLANT and him on Earth, so far away that if ever the need of his presence arose, she won't be able to reach him faster, made him giddy. He had always been over-protective of his mother. She was such a soft-spoken woman.

_Please be well. _

Whatever was happening in the PLANTs, he wished it'd be over soon. Being on Earth was bad for him. Glancing once again at Kari, he knew he needed to get away. Fast.

He would have gone on and on thinking and worrying about the colony had Kari not suddenly let out an uncharacteristic gasp, and she stopped dead in her tracks.

Yzak stopped too, a few steps ahead of her. Looking over his shoulder and the heavy bag stuffed with books, he frowned. "What happened?"

A faint pink glow rose to her cheeks as she slowly turned her wide eyes at him, mouth hanging ajar, her hands clasped tightly, unsteadily. "Yzak...?"

The Duel pilot let the bag drop to the ground, suddenly worrying. "What's wrong? Are you in pain?"

Kari blinked several times, and her flushed face gradually paled. A squeak escaped from her throat at an attempt to speak.

Yzak hesitantly touched her shoulder, then gulped. "Hey... What's wrong?"

She did not answer, but instead, so un-Kari-like, she bolted to a dead run down the hall, a noisy 'tap-tap-tap'-ing following her wake. Puzzled, and very much at a loss for words, Yzak hurriedly followed after scooping up the bag on the floor. For someone who didn't look like she could move that fast, Kari was nowhere in sight by the time Yzak turned the curb of the hall. This time, panic gripped his throat. What the heck was going on?

Slowing down to a jog, the confused Duel pilot scouted the hall for any potential sign of where she might have gone. Giving the hall a once-over, he found no trace.

Except when he heard something that made him sigh in relief.

He heard someone flushing a toilet.

Ah, of course. The women's bathroom was the only door open. Heading straight to the end of the hall where white light spilled from the inside of the women's toilet, he deposited Kari's bag on the floor and leaned on the doorframe, peeking inside cautiously.

The tiles inside the room where a sparkly white, and everything was clean. Ignoring the annoying lemony-fresh scent wafting from the small pine tree deodorizer hanging from the doorknob, his eyes traveled from the sink to the three closed cubicles at the end of the room. He could see a pair of feet in the middle cubicle, uneasily shuffling themselves as if in a frenzy.

Yzak knitted his brows together. Knocking uncertainly on the door of the toilet, he called out. "Hey! Are you okay?"

The feet suddenly stopped moving at the sound of his voice. "Yzak?"

"What the heck just happened to you? You took off without saying anything. You could have just said that you wanted to go take a dump or something."

There was another flush from her cubicle, and more sounds that resembled that of toilet paper pulling. "Yzak, come here."

"_What?_"

"Please. I need your help."

_Is this girl for real? _Struggling for a good excuse not to step into the women's toilet - as he found no reason for him to be in there to begin with – he slumped to the wall of the hall. "Kari, I refuse to enter the women's toilet."

"Yzak, this is an emergency. _Please?_"

Now what? The girl was begging him. And it _did _sound urgent. He had never seen her so agitated by anything before. Giving up, he looked left, then right, making sure no one would see him invading uncharted territory. After taking a deep breath, he plunged into the whiteness that was the women's toilet.

"What?" he snapped as he stopped stiffly right in front of the cubicle she was in.

There was more shuffling in the cubicle, and after a while, he saw a set of keys slide out from under the door along with a brown coin purse. "Yzak, I need you to do me a favor."

Yzak stared at the objects on the floor as if he just saw a rattlesnake slither from under the door. "What?" he asked, honestly dreading her request.

"I need you to go down to the bookstore and buy me a sanitary napkin."

"_**WHAT!?"**_

"A sanitary napkin, Yzak. It's a disposable absorbent – "

"I know what a… a _sanitary napkin _is, dammit! Kari! Of all people, why do I have to be the one to buy you one?" Yzak paled, recoiling away from the keys and the coin purse.

He had never been so embarrassed in his life! But when he thought things just couldn't get any worse, Kari added more to his misery. "And Yzak? Since you are headed there anyway, you will be passing my locker. I threw the keys out. It's the brass one for locker ES-1624. Do you mind if you drop by it on the way? I have extra underwear stashed in there."

Yzak felt like he was going to faint. The girl sounded as if asking guys to get your underwear for you was the most natural thing to do! Wavering and catching himself with his hand on the sink, he choked out his words of protest. "Let me get this straight. You want me to march down to the _bookstore_, and buy you a _sanitary napkin_. Then, _along the way_, you want me to _prowl _through your locker in search for your extra _panties_?"

"Yes," she said seriously.

"_**Are you nuts?!"**_

This time, the answer that came from inside the cubicle made him sober. "No, Yzak. I am not nuts. I am a girl caught off-guard by her monthly period who is suffering from helplessness because I am trapped in this cubicle with no resources to aid me whatsoever and the only person I can count on is afraid of a feminine pad and undies. Please. Just hurry."

Stammering for words, Yzak straightened. He was most certainly not afraid of feminine pads! "Fine. I'll go. Do you need anything else?"

"Now that you mention it, I would appreciate a roll of tissue paper."

Yzak felt his face heat up at the next question that he asked. "Would you like the regular or the ones with wings?"

There was a long silence from the other side of the door, and he suddenly started to feel paranoid. Kari's reply made him want to hide under a rock. "With wings, Yzak. My, I didn't know you knew of the variety."

"Hey, I have experienced having a mother, too. And maybe you can add this to your research: Female Coordinators experience the same monthly cycle," he said defensively.

This made Kari laugh.

"I'm glad you can find the humor in this, Kari, because I don't," he snarled as he scooped up with his left hand the purse and keys from the floor. Kari laughed even more, making Yzak scurry out of there in a jiffy.

The purchasing of the feminine pad was not at all that bad, except for the part when the Japanese girl in the counter stared at him suspiciously when he asked for one. After handing him his change for a roll of tissue and the pad, she turned away after muttering "_Sukebe!_" under her breath. Yzak assumed it was a Japanese word. Whatever it meant, he was sure as shit it wasn't a compliment, judging by the way she had eyed him. Putting the incident aside, he marched down to Locker ES-1624 for task number two.

When Yzak opened Kari's locker, he discovered it was like a mini office. Neat folders were stacked one against the other, full of thick paperwork. An open bag of plain M&M's was sitting near the opening, and a small corkboard was hanging on the door. And there, innocently folded next to the _'positive reinforcements'_, was a pink lace panty. Yzak still couldn't believe this was happening to him! Once again making sure there weren't any people around, his hand plunged in and out of the locker, and in a second, the pink panty was stuffed securely in his pant pocket.

For a split-second, in his mind's eye, he could see Dearka rolling on the ground with laughter if he found out of this little incident.

_He'll never let me live this down. Never. Ever..._

Yzak shuddered. Good thing he was in Orb. And hadn't he been as stiff as a rock when he left? It must be the parent thing. Snickering and feeling a bit better, he was about to shut the locker door when something caught his attention.

There, in the corner of the stack of folders, a small colorful, glossy piece of paper was conspicuously poking out of a disorganized pile of other papers. Curiosity getting the best of him, he reached out gingerly and plucked the paper that he discovered was an old photograph. Peering down at it, he gasped at what he saw.

It was a picture of a girl with long, long reddish-blonde hair, smiling happily at the camera. She looked like she was in her early twenties, except the girl...

She looked exactly like Kari...

_What the...? _Yzak grimaced as he flipped the photo over and read the small scribbling below it. It read, _Karina Takano, CE 32-CE 54. _

_What the hell is this?_

Shaking himself out of this weird and utterly disturbing discovery, he replaced the photograph on top of the stack of folders, slammed to locker shut, replaced the padlock, and hurried to the women's bathroom, where Kari was waiting, but not without thoughts of the photograph swimming in his head.

_Could it be Kari had an older sister? No. That can't be right… Mrs. Takano never mentioned anything about her. And why did the girl have the same name as Kari? _

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Miriallia waved happily as she watched the van carrying Athrun, Cagalli and Kisaka roll down the curb on the way to the Attha Estate, leaving her, Dearka, Kazui and Sai standing under a shed in the inner city where they were to be met by their parents. Miriallia had never been this excited in her life, aside of course from the time when the war actually ended. But ever since then, she had been looking forward to seeing her parents and was glad that they were safe.

Giddy with excitement, she gripped Dearka's arm nervously. "I'm finally going to see them, Dearka."

The Buster pilot smiled down at her with a strained effort that made her laugh. There, under the bright lights of the buildings around them, he looked like he was waiting to be shot. He squeezed her arm gently, and for the first time since their kiss under the rain, he did not start to ramble at their contact. "So will your father attack me with a knife, or a gun?"

"Huh?"

"Coz if he's attacking me with a knife, I could always make a run for it."

"And if it's a gun?"

"I could run much faster."

This made Miriallia laugh even more. Finally, they were talking normally. It must be the tension of having to meet her parents for the first time… "My father will not attack you. He's a very kind man. You'll like him."

Dearka shuddered. "Will he like me?"

Of course, that was always a possibility. Their parents had met and liked Tolle a lot… And although she had been constantly assured by her mother that they will love Dearka as much, regardless of what he is, she still did not know how they would get along well, what with her boyfriend a basket case and, according to her mother, her father was equally as stressed, having found out their only daughter was seeing a Coordinator. Not that he minded. He was just unsure of the things he's supposed to talk about at dinner. Miriallia's father loved small talk, always insisting that everyone should contribute to the conversation while feasting. And so at the discovery of her father being nervous about talking to someone over a meal made Miriallia doubtful about this first meeting.

She let her eyes drink in the atmosphere of the city and smiled as she watched people hurry about their business. It was already late in the evening and everyone was rushing home to their families. Once again, excitement overcame her. A few more minutes, she, too will be seeing her family. She couldn't wait…

Giggling up at Dearka, she then turned to Kazui and Sai who were kidding around with each other a few steps away from them. They, too, looked like they were awfully looking forward to this.

Of course, she didn't let that opportunity pass to poke fun at them when Yzak actually shook their hands before they left. The Duel pilot had initiated the gesture, and had caught everyone off-guard, making Sai and Kazui blush. Goodbyes weren't actually the Duel pilot's forte, and so the moment he did shake their hands, he left immediately, not bothering to see them off.

Miriallia frowned. Come to think of it, aside from Kari and Lacus, no one else saw them off. Kira was in and out of their room after planting a kiss on her and Cagalli's cheek, a playful nudge for Athrun after threatening him that if he didn't treat Cagalli right, he'd make sure Athrun would get it good, and a few words to Kazui and Sai. He seemed happy with whatever he was doing. She hoped to God he wasn't going to do anything drastic. It was not Kira at all to be that way, not after being ignored again by Lacus.

Her thoughts were interrupted by a blue hover van stopping right in front of her and a dark-haired couple popped out from the inside. Kazui cried ecstatically as he dropped his bag on the pavement and immediately was engulfed in hugs and kisses from his parents. Miriallia stepped back a few steps, pulling a perplexed Dearka with her as they watched the reunited family happily kid around at how Kazui had grown. A few words were passed around the group, and after a hug was given to Milly and Sai, and a pat on the shoulder for Dearka, the couple hopped back in on the hover van and Kazui followed, but not without a playful nudge for Sai, saying that he'll see him around. He shook Dearka's hand and told him the same thing, then turned to Milly and gave her a hug.

"Milly," he whispered in her ear before pulling away. "You know where to find me. Tell Cagalli that if she needs me, I'll be more than willing to help." Milly nodded and the boy hoped in with his family, sticking his head out of the window and waved like crazy as the van pulled away, screaming at the top of his lungs, _"Dearka! Good luck! I hope your dodging abilities serve their purpose! Milly's dad delivers a mean fast ball!"_ And the van disappeared in the alley.

Dearka face paled.

Miriallia squeezed his upper arm, feeling his tense muscles under his shirt. "He's kidding."

"Holy, I hope so."

Sai clamped a hand on his shoulder and shook him a bit. "D, relax. You'll do fine. The Hawws are nice people. Milly's mom makes good apple tarts, too."

Dearka swallowed hard, and if anything seemed more frightened. "Apple… tarts…"

Sai was about to cheer him up more when another vehicle pulled up in front of them. The welcome of the Argyle family did not differ much from Kazui's. A lot of hugging and crying and constant scolding, telling Sai that he had lost weight.. And after that, the family bid them goodbye. Sai, who couldn't seem to resist the urge, also poked his head out and screamed, _"Dearka! Mrs. Haww's cooking is soooo good!!! Stay there for a few days and you'll get fat and pudgy in no time!"_

This made Dearka cringe.

Milly waved at the retreating vehicle and then turned to Dearka. "Now _that _wasn't a lie." She poked Dearka's lean stomach, tickling him playfully. The Buster pilot stared down at her with a dreaded look. Miriallia blinked at him. "What? You don't believe me?"

"Oh, I believe you all right…"

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Dearka's brow furrowed as he stared down at that expectantly excited face of his girlfriend with a growing dread of sitting down with her _'perfect' _parents who cook real good meals, and who, according to Miriallia, were looking forward to meeting the boy who _'rescued their daughter from much grief'_.

"I'm telling you the truth, Dearka. She makes good fruit salad, too," she boasted as she hooked her pinky fingers on each belt loop of his pants and pulled him closer to her, making him place his hands on her shoulders. He immediately jumped back, frightened that her parents might suddenly appear out of no where and see them that close to each other.

Man, he was a wreck! Miriallia didn't seem to catch on with his withdrawal from her playful gestures and she pulled him forward again. Well, at least his brain was functioning well, even with Miriallia this close to him. The strawberry scent of her hair seemed to provide a calm that he'd been missing since their departure from Abashiri.

Now, in all honesty, he was not scared what Miriallia's parents were, whether they be mean or rude or whatever to him. In fact, he would have loved that more than the given background of the Haww family. A caring father and a loving mother, and Dearka Elthman in between… It was a disaster waiting to happen. They were the perfect family, and anything perfect was always the easiest to ruin.

_Oh, God, please don't let me mess up…_

Miriallia slipped her fingers out of his belt loops and crossed her arms across her chest, eyeing him suspiciously. "Dearka Elthman, what is wrong with you? You've been acting like… like you're waiting for your turn at the electric chair."

"What a good analogy. I feel exactly the same way."

"Dearka!"

Dearka crossed his own arms and stared at Miriallia with equal suspicion. "And I suppose you're not feeling at all nervous with this first meeting?"

Miriallia tilted her head back, eyeing him up and down, opening her mouth to say something, but no words came out. She closed her mouth and withered. "My nerves are wracked as heck…"

Dearka pointed at her accusingly. "See? You yourself know this is going to be a disaster!"

Miriallia's eyes widened. "I do not!"

Dearka sighed, lowering his hand and slipping it inside his pocket. "I'm sorry, Miriallia. I know that I'll love your parents, but I don't exactly look like I'd fit in this kind of setting."

Miriallia pouted and murmured sadly, "It's just dinner…"

"Exactly. With _your _family. They'll hate me. I just know it."

"They'll _love _you." She poked him again, and he jerked to the left, startled. "_I _love you. So why wouldn't they."

At the mention of those words – _I love you – _he felt a warm spot in his heartthat made his smile. Dearka covered the smile with a playful sneer. "Yeah, well I remember our first meeting, and you didn't exactly love me then. Well, you loved to _kill _me, I suppose, but – what? Why are you laughing?"

"Because you're funny. Everything will be fine." She touched his cheek and Dearka closed his eyes at her touch. "You're coming here as Dearka Elthman, Milly's boyfriend, not as Dearka Elthman, Buster pilot and ZAFT soldier. We'll eat and talk and get things over with, and retire for the night. My mom already has the guest room ready for your occupancy, dear, sweet Mr. Elthman."

Slowly, Dearka opened his eyes and found her smiling up at him sweetly, comforting his negative premonitions of dinner. He smiled, touching her hand with his and squeezing softly. "Well just tell me this: is there anything I have to be warned about? The taboos in your house? What your father likes to talk about? Everything?"

This made Miriallia start to think, and for a moment, Dearka thought that there wouldn't be anything she could help him with. It turned out to be a fairly long list.

"My father loves to talk about baseball, as you could have guessed with Kazui's comment about the fast ball."

"Baseball?"

_I'm dead._

Miriallia gripped his arm and excitedly went on. "He loves to talk, and my mother would insist for second to third helpings, so be prepared for major multitasking, as you need to talk and eat at the same time. If you want to score a bit on my mother, it's easy. Just comment on the neatness of the house or her cooking and you're pretty much in."

"Neatness of the house. Cooking. All right."

She went on even more. "My father loves to have beer before he goes to bed, so there's a big chance that he'd ask you out to the patio for a few bottles."

"So I should accept."

"No. You should decline."

"What?"

"At first. You don't want to sound too eager, right?"

"Oh! Right!"

"Anyway, after a bit of coaxing, that's when you can accept the offer. Drink but half a bottle of beer."

"Why just half?"

"Because you don't want him to think you're used to drinking a lot. That will turn him off."

Dearka scratched his head, slightly confused. Damn, Miriallia's dad sure was an odd man. "Uh, okay… If you say so… Is there anything else?"

Miriallia clasped her hands behind her back, stared at Dearka for a good three seconds before bursting into a fit of laughter.

This confused Dearka even more. "What?"

Miriallia panted, trying to catch her breath. "Dearka! You actually were hanging to my every word, weren't you?"

"Well, of course I am! They're your parents and so – wait a minute! You were just kidding around?"

Miriallia took a deep breath, her face puffing up as she tried to hold more laughter inside. She nodded, then exploded into another fit of hysterical giggles.

Dearka stared at her for a few moments as she laughed her head off at his misfortune. Then, getting a little embarrassed, he let out a roar and grabbed her, slinging her over his shoulder in a fireman's hold. "Why you little…! I was actually taking everything seriously!" He spun her around a few times, not minding the few people who were staring at them from across the street.

Miriallia giggled as she pulled gently at his hair. "Yes you were. And it was so funny."

He set her down on her own feet and steadied her with his hands on her shoulders. "Now tell me the truth. What do I have to know?"

Milly sobered a bit and met his gaze. She also placed her hands on his shoulders, then nodded. "Nothing, Dearka. Just be the guy I know and love. They won't be able to resist your charm."

"For some weird reason, I find that even more frightening to convey."

"Why's that?"

Ruffling her hair messily, making her giggle, he kissed her forehead. "That Elthman charm made you want to drive a blade through my face, remember?"

"God help us all."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Lacus sighed as she let Yalin take the plastic bag of groceries she was carrying as she stepped out of the City Supermarket. Frustrated that she had to shop for groceries in that specific store because it was the nearest, she forced a smile to the good looking boy, who in turn smiled back.

"You know, you don't have to walk me home. It's just a few blocks away. I can manage," she said as she stopped and tried to get the plastic bag back. Yalin wouldn't yield.

"For some strange reason, I have a feeling you're trying to get rid of me…" the boy kidded as he pulled the bag out of her reach, grinning.

Lacus laughed faintly, backing away a bit. "Not at all, Mr. Faraon. I just don't want to disturb you, that's all."

Yalin was supposed to say something when suddenly, Mr. Pink popped out of Lacus' pocket and screeched in a very loud, electronic voice, "_How are you? I am fine! And so are you!_"

Lacus grabbed the pink metallic ball with both hands, then held it close to her chest. "Sorry about that. Mr. Pink loves the attention, and he hates cramped spaces."

Yalin was intrigued. "What a funny little toy. Who gave it to you?"

"A good friend of mine." She stuffed the haro back in her pocket and smiled at him. "Well, I have to go. You really don't have to walk me to my dorm."

"But it's already dark. It isn't safe for you to wander around all alone." Yalin said.

Shifting uncomfortably, Lacus tried to search for a good enough excuse to make him leave her alone, when someone suddenly touched her shoulder from behind, making her jump.

It was Kira, his scraggly hair covering half of his face. Lacus wanted to reach out and brush back his bangs to see his eyes.

"You're right, Yalin. It isn't safe for her to wander around all alone. I'll take her home," the Freedom pilot said silently as he stepped forward and reached out his free hand that wasn't on Lacus' shoulder. "Thank you for carrying those for her. I appreciate it. You can hand it back now."

Lacus nervously watched both boys glare at each other for a moment, then, finally Yalin gave way, handing the bag grudgingly, not letting his grey eyes leave Kira's lavender ones.

Kira took the bag and nodded at the boy before turning to Lacus. "Shall we?"

Lacus blinked a few times, then finally nodded. "Oh, okay…" she bowed at Yalin awkwardly and saw him smiling sadly at her as she straightened. She felt Kira's hand slip to her waist and she let him lead her towards the women's dorm.

They walked in silence with Kira once in a while glancing towards her, but saying nothing.

Lacus swallowed hard, her mind reeling. This was the first time she had actually seen Kira insist to be with her over the days she had been trying to avoid him. What he could be thinking, she didn't know. Where did this sudden surge of initiative come from? Her thoughts were interrupted by Kira's voice.

"How are you?" he asked quietly, the hand resting on her waist not leaving its place.

Lacus blushed. "I'm fine. Thank you for asking."

This made Kira turn to her directly, his eyes searching her face that she so desperately tried to hide from him. "So, tell me. How have your storybooks been lately?"

Strange question. She looked up at him but immediately turned away. He had such serious eyes. "I have read Cinderella twice yesterday night. I have run out of good books lately."

Kira returned his gaze back on the road and sighed. "I see."

"Hmm?"

"I've been to your dorm to check up on you but you weren't there. So was Kari. I got worried and started looking for you." He wrinkled his nose. "You shouldn't be out at night alone. It's dangerous."

"I'm sorry."

"Forget it." His hand left her waist and slowly, shyly, reached out for her hand, lacing his fingers with hers. "Listen. I've been an ass. Forgive me?"

The apology was so direct and to-the-point that it rendered Lacus speechless for a few minutes before being able to answer. She scratched her head a bit, stared at his hand holding hers, then turned to him. "Kira…"

Then, amid that serious face half-hidden behind too-long brown hair, Kira smiled. It was good to see him smile again. "Don't answer if you don't feel like it, Lacus. I was looking for you earlier because I got you something. I left it on the doorstep of your dorm. Maybe you'll like it."

This made Lacus' heart leap a bit. "What is it?"

Kira smiled secretly. "A surprise."

And they were silent.

The moment they reached the parking lot of the dorm, however, Kira let go of her hand and held out the plastic bag full of groceries. "Here. Take care, okay?"

The disappointment of finding out that Kira was not going to stay for a bit surprised her. And since she had been so convinced in setting up reservations for herself, she didn't dare invite him up. "I will. Thank you for walking me home…"

"You're welcome." He cocked his head to the right as his beautiful eyes examined her face intently. "Are you attending the Summer Festival on Monday?"

The songstress shook her head slowly. "You know I won't, Kira… I'm sorry…"

This made his lips break into a smile. "Don't be. I was hoping you'd be free on Monday."

"Huh? Wha…?"

Kira slipped his hands in his pockets and started to explain why. "Lacus, I need you to come meet me in AU, right behind the gym at six o'clock in the evening on Monday. Will you come?"

What a weird invitation… And although Lacus was expecting something like this from him, she was caught off-guard once again with what he said next.

"Please come. There are many people expecting you to be there."

_People…?_

She was expecting a date, but with other people present…? What was this about?

Nodding anyway, she muttered a silent, "All right."

He nodded, then, to Lacus' surprise, he bent down and kissed her on the cheek, as he had before he left for the final battle… Then he started to walk away.

She watched his back as he disappeared through the alley leading to twelfth, and the songstress sighed. Shifting the plastic bag from one hand to another, she started for the dorm steps.

The '_things' _Kira got for her were indeed sitting patiently right at her doorstep. They were wrapped in a big, bulky brown paper bag and when she picked it up, she was surprised at its weight. Fumbling for her keycard, she managed to open the door and stumbled inside, muttering silently when her shin hit the doorframe by accident. She flipped open the switch and deposited all the stuff on the dining room table. She had wanted to cook something for Kari, as this was the first night they will be rooming together. _Sukiyaki _was the best she could come up with, especially when Milly had insisted on buying a portable gas range and ceramic bowl fit for _Shabu-Shabu_ and _Sukiyaki. _

But instead of unloading the necessary ingredients for their evening meal, she attacked the brown paper bag that Kira left for her.

The things inside made her blink, then frown.

There, folded ever so neatly inside the bag, was a long, white dress full of lace, and a sequined tiara that looked like it was taken from a storybook. Pulling out the dress, she held it out for her to see, uncalled for things popping in and out of her mind as to what the heck Kira was thinking on giving her something like this.

Then again, the dress was not that bad. It was actually pretty charming, with off-shoulder sleeves of some shiny material that sparkled with an assortment of colors ranging from silver to green to blue. The bodice was snug at the waist and the bottom ballooned into a billowy skirt with a tail that trailed back a few feet. Pressing it against her body, she found out that it was exactly the right length for her.

_Did Kira buy this?_

When she noticed that there were still more stuff inside the bag, she hurried to the front door and closed it, then laid the dress on the couch, gently making sure that there weren't any folds on the bodice.

She rummaged through it curiously and found a stack of thin paperback books. All of them had colorful covers that read _'The Princess and the Pea', 'Beauty and the Beast', 'A Thousand and One Nights', _and many more. She giggled and shook her head at the thoughtfulness of the act, then flipped on the first few pages of the book sitting on top of the stack. After a while of skimming through the book's pages, she finally set them on top of the table and once again went through the brown paper bag.

And gasped as she unearthed a pair of lovely transparent strappy sandals with heels raised a few inches from the floor. They were the loveliest shoes she had ever seen in her life! And she couldn't even believe they fit!

Yes, the moment she had taken them out of the bag, she immediately crashed on the couch and put them on. She loved them! Even the heels looked like they were made out of glass…

She leaned back on the couch and raised her feet for her to look at it better. After a moment of admiring it, she found herself frowning again.

_What are these for?_

Taking off the sandals, she set them carefully at the foot of the couch, once again picking up the books. It was then did she notice a small pink stationery poking out from '_Beauty and the Beast_'.

"A note?" she murmured to herself and plucked the piece of paper, bringing it up to her face to read it.

There, scribbled in loopy cursive handwriting – definitely Kira's penmanship – was another extension of the mystery Kira was putting her through.

_Wear this on Monday…_

_Please?_

_Kira_

Lacus scratched her head again, pulled at her hair gently, as she tried to decipher the strange gift that Kira had left at her doorstep…

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Now Dearka knew where Miriallia got her good looks.

Mrs. Emily Haww was a kind faced lady with darker hair than her daughter's, held back in a loose ponytail by a red handkerchief, faint lines on her face that showed to everyone that she smiled a lot. She was wearing a plain yellow dress when they arrived to the Haww residence; only Mr. Albert Haww was the one who fetched them in the inner city. A tall, well-built man, he loved to chuckle a lot. Dearka's nervousness faded a notch, but got even worse when the four of them finally settled down to eat.

The house was too big for a family of three, but it was indeed well-maintained. And so whether or not what Miriallia told him about commenting on the house to please her mother was a joke or not, he still could not help but point it out.

"You have a lovely home, Mrs. Haww," the Buster pilot commented as Miriallia guided him to the seat where he was supposed to sit for the dreaded dinner of doom. He knew that he was going to mess things up. He just knew it.

Mrs. Haww, who was setting a huge wooden bowl of greens in the middle of the table right next to the fried chicken and garlic rice, smiled at him. "My what a nice thing to say, Dearka. But please, call me Emmy. Mrs. Haww is so formal…"

That made Dearka pause for a bit. Well, of course for a soldier, formalities were everything. Yet he was astound to find out that addressing an older person by their first name made him feel warm and fuzzy inside. Especially since it was Miriallia's mother. "Thank you, Emmy."

Miriallia had taken the seat next to him on the square table, across from her father, who, by the way, was staring at Dearka intently.

Dearka tried to brush the feeling of being watched aside, loosening the collar of his shirt a bit, finding it suddenly very unnaturally stuffy in a well ventilated room. He laughed nervously. "The food looks great," he said lamely, and Miriallia covered her mouth, trying to hide a smile.

"My wife makes the best breaded chicken in Orb!" Mr. Haww boomed as he picked up the plate of chicken and thrust it at Dearka, smiling encouragingly, but still watching him with those beady blue eyes of his that made him feel utterly naked.

Dearka helped himself to the chicken as Miriallia scooped up some rice for him.

"So, Dearka. Tell me. How did you and Milly meet?" Emmy asked as she poured juice in their glasses.

Milly dropped the serving spoon on the table, sending hot, steaming rice straight to Dearka's pants, causing the Buster pilot to cry out and leap to his feet, knocking his chicken out of its plate and on to the floor. It slid a few feet across the clean tiles.

_Kill me, God. Kill me now!!!_

"Oh, dear! Are you all right?" Emmy asked as she, too got to her feet.

"No! I'm all right, Emmy. Please don't get up." Dearka picked up the chicken from the floor and replaced it on his plate, which Mrs. Haww immediately swiped off to the kitchen to replace with a new one.

Dearka fell back on his chair, Miriallia mouthing an apology to him, her face all red.

He shook his head, somehow finding the situation funny, in a deranged kind of way.

Mr. Haww, however, was chuckling happily. "Hey Emm, your chicken is still alive! You sure you cooked it all though out?"

This made the kind wife laugh gaily as she placed another chicken on the tan boy's plate. "I think it's my fault. I was so nervous of finally meeting Dearka that I must have undercooked the chicken."

Milly laughed. Dearka did too, quite nervously.

_They're trying to make me feel like it wasn't my fault… God, kill me!!!_

The whole conversation from then on was a comfortable one, and Dearka was actually starting to feel quite at home. It revolved mainly around what happened to them in space, and Miriallia was more than willing to tell the whole thing. What surprised Dearka more was that the Hawws were actually surprised to find out about it… It appears that the news of the details about the war had not been well circulated, as there really weren't any among the EA or ZAFT who were willing to broadcast that had it not been for the rebels who had fought for humanity and not for a single race, they would have once again created the biggest mistake of all time.

At least that explained a lot… Dearka had always wondered why the government in Hokkaido had insisted to hide the truth of the war. He had seen the negative effects of hiding the truth. Kian was a good example of that. Since they really didn't know what had happened in the war, people had started formulating their own causes.

Smooth sailing of talking with Milly's parents and he was starting to enjoy it, when Mr. Albert Haww popped the big question.

"So! When are you youngsters going to get married?"

Dearka and Milly, who were both in the middle of sipping the hot tea Emmy had brought in after desert, swallowed wrongly and ended up in violent coughing fits.

To his dismay, Emmy only laughed happily and left the table with the plates.

Miriallia slammed the cup of tea on the table, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. "_Da-ad!!!_"

Albert turned to her innocently. "What, Milly? You're already sixteen! Isn't it about time you find a suitable man to be your fiancée?"

Dearka felt like regurgitating the four helpings of chicken he had consumed.

"Grandchildren is definitely a must. No less than five!!!"

_God, save me!!!_

"Mom! Tell dad to stop!" Milly whined loudly.

Dearka laughed nervously. This was definitely a weird setting. Unlike normal fathers who wouldn't even let their only daughter come into close contact with a boy, afraid to lose her early, here was Mr. Haww, practically giving Miriallia away... What an odd man...

Fortunately, Emmy came to the rescue. She glided back in the room with a green bath towel. "Stop harassing the kids, dear. They must be tired. Here." She handed the towel to the Buster pilot. "I've drawn you a bath. Please make yourself at home. Milly, be a dear and show him the second floor bathroom."

Shooting a grateful look at her mother, Milly grabbed Dearka's arm and dragged him out of his seat. "I will. I'll show him the guestroom while we're at it. Then I'll come back down and help you with the dishes. Okay, mom?"

"Are you sure? I'll let you sit this one down, since it's been a long trip."

"I'll help, mom. I'll be right back." And Dearka was hoisted away to the stairs.

"It was the best dinner I've ever had in my life, Emmy," he called out before Milly pulled him away completely.

"You come right back down after you get settled, son!" he heard Mr. Haww call out to him, chuckling. "Join me later for a few beers, all right?"

"Yes, sir!"

And Dearka heaved a sigh of relief and adjusted the green towel slung over his shoulder when they finally reached the safety of the second floor. He turned to Miriallia and discovered her face was beet red, a smile tugging at one corner of her lips.

"What?" he asked uncertainly.

She shook her head. "Nothing."

"Liar. What is it? You're creeping me out."

She giggled and led him by the hand along the corridor, stopping in front of the last door to the left. "This is your room. It's right across mine, so if you need anything later, you can just knock. Okay?"

Dearka frowned. "Don't change the subject. Why were you all red and smiling?"

Miriallia took his hand again and led him back up the corridor and stopped in front of the door in the middle in the rows of doors to the right. "This is the bathroom. Now go ahead and freshen up. I'll be right downstairs so if you need anything, you can just call me."

"You sure you don't need my help?"

She shook her head, her hair spilling across her eyes. "You're a guest in our house, Mr. Elthman. It's a crime for my mother if we make the guest work. So you just stay here and soak up in the bath my mother drew for you."

Dearka bit his lower lip, studying that look of hers as she smiled up at him. "Why were you smiling earlier? Did I do something funny?"

She shook her head again, leaned over and pushed the bathroom door open. "Get in."

Dearka didn't budge. "What did I do?"

She shoved him inside. "Nothing."

The Buster pilot was about to protest when suddenly, Miriallia bent forward, planted a kiss on his lips, then grabbed the doorknob. "You made them fall in love with you. As you did with me." And with that, the door slammed closed, leaving Dearka standing inside a dimly lit lavender-tiled bathroom.

He just stood there, staring at the door for a few seconds, stunned at the unexpected kiss from her. That was the second kiss she had stolen from him. She didn't even give any warning.

He decided those were the best kisses in the world.

Turning around to examine the Haww bathroom, he was impressed at what he saw. First of all, it was clean. He did not believe there was a single dirty nook or cranny in Emmy's house. There was a low bathtub filled with steaming scented water, and next to it, a small low wooden stool with lit candles on it. He found himself smiling at the effort Milly's mother went through for him.

Taking off his shoes, then his clothes, folding them neatly on the hamper in the corner, placed the towel on the sink, and then looked through the mirror hanging over it. His face, smiling moronically, stared back at him.

It was a remarkable sight. He had never seen his face this relaxed before. Turning away from the mirror, he lowered himself into the tub and let out a sigh of pleasure at the warmth of the water. It felt good on his stiff shoulders and joints. Warm baths were definitely something he could get used to...

Closing his eyes, he lowered himself more and let the water come up to his chin, inhaling the flowery scent, He loved it.

He could have stayed there forever, in fact. But his eyes fluttered open when he heard someone knocking. He would not have noticed he had fallen asleep in the tub had it not been for the candles; they had melted halfway through already.

"Dearka?" He heard Miriallia call out from outside. "Have you drowned in the tub?"

Dearka laughed silently. "No, Miriallia. I'm still alive. Unfortunately."

"Good. I had thought you'd escaped through the window to avoid talking to my dad more."

"Nah. He's a nice guy. He wants us to get married."

There was a silence from outside. Deakra pushed himself up a bit, worried that Milly had been offended by his remark. "Miriallia? You there?"

"Um, yeah. Dearka?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm coming in, okay?"

Dearka's eyes widened. "What?!"

Too late. The door opened, admitting a neutral-faced Milly. She closed the door, but stayed facing the wall, her back to him. Dearka lowered himself in the water again, playing it safe if she suddenly turned to face him and see him naked.

When she didn't say anything, he began to worry. "Miriallia? What is it?"

She shook her head, laughing softly. "Dearka, we're really here, aren't we?"

"In this bathroom? Yes we are. And, uhm, I'm kind of scared to find out what your father will do to me if he found out," he kidded.

She did not laugh.

"Miriallia?"

He stiffened in the tub when he heard a suppressed sob escape from her throat. His eyes widened. "Are you crying?"

Another sob escaped from her.

Dearka's eyes darted from the green towel sitting on the sink. Which was like five feet away from him. _Dammit!_

Helplessly, he turned back to Milly, tempted to ask her to throw him the towel. But that would be so insensitive of him. Here she was, crying for some unknown reason to him, and here he was naked and helpless in a tub.

It was too funny, he wanted to weep...

"Dearka, I want you to know that I love you because you're you, okay? Not because of anything else."

_Huh?_

He shook his head. "Where did that come from? Miriallia, what happened?"

Another sob escaped from her, making Dearka wince. "My mom and I were washing the dishes... and she asked me about my feelings about you... and Tolle..."

At this Dearka froze. That name. It was the name that he'd been dreading to hear. It had been an unspoken agreement to avoid that name, not because Miriallia wanted to forget, but because she had wanted to move on.

Running a wet hand through his hair, he looked down at the water. "Your mom... she doesn't like me? She likes Tolle better?"

"No!" She cried out, suddenly whirling around.

Dearka let out a yelp and sank deeper into the water. Milly didn't seem to care. Her face was contorted in pain, as if what she was about to say hurt her. "She said she hopes I'm not using you as a rebound... and that she hopes I'm sincere with my feelings for you... because she thinks you're a nice young man and that I shouldn't be using you..." She turned around again and faced the door. "Even I don't understand how I could have moved on so fast... but I did... Why do I have to always have an explanation for it? I can't explain it, Dearka!" And with that, she broke down crying completely, her shoulders shaking uncontrollably.

"Miriallia, don't cry... please... I... " _Oh, screw it all! _He pushed himself up from the tub, out of the hot water and into the cold open, not even caring that he had no clothes on and that he was wet. He made his way to Miriallia and wrapped his arms around her shoulders from behind. "Don't cry... Please don't cry..."

She turned around and buried her face to his naked wet chest, somehow calming down a bit. "Dearka, however I can't explain it, you do believe me, don't you?"

Nuzzling his face to her strawberry-scented hair, he laughed. "You know what, Miriallia? Even _if _you are just using me as a rebound, I couldn't care any less... So long as I could be around you, as long as you'd have me be this close to you, I don't care." And it was true.

_So long as you let me love you this much, nothing else matters..._

This seemed to cheer her up. She looked up at him, smiling beneath the tears. Dearka wiped her cheek with a finger and smiled back. "Did you and your mom fight because of this?"

She shook her head. "No. She said she didn't mean to make me sad, but I wanted to tell you, just to make sure that you'd know that time doesn't have anything to do with what I feel. Murrue understood me... and I'm glad you do, too."

Dearka nodded and knocked his forehead to hers gently. "Cry-baby."

Miriallia sneered evilly. "You're the one who's naked as a babe here."

The Buster pilot felt all the blood rush to his face as he looked down and discovered that he was, in fact, naked. With another loud yelp, he dove for the sink, grabbed the towel and hurriedly wrapped it around his waist. But by the time he did, Miriallia was already out of the door and laughing her pretty little head in the corridor.

"Dearka, do get dressed and get your cute little tan ass downstairs. My dad's out in the patio with a few bottles of beer, waiting for a chat with you." And with that, she left.

He could still hear her laughing all the way downstairs.

He stared at himself in the moist mirror, seeing a blurred reflection of himself. Using his hand, he cleared a strip of moist from the surface of the mirror and found his flushed face look back at him. Sighing in frustration, he bent down by the tub and blew out the candles.

_I don't know what's better. That, or getting walked in on by Cagalli..._

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

After having stashed his things in the closet of the fairly big guestroom, Dearka threw on a white shirt and a pair of ripped pants and proceeded downstairs where he saw Milly sprawled on the living room carpet, her nose in a book, a stout Peter Pan mug sitting beside her. She was already in her pj's. When she saw him come in the room, she waved a bit, then jerked her thumb behind her, gesturing to the patio.

Scratching his head, he complied, crossing the carpet. Milly tried to grab at his leg when he passed but he dodged easily and playfully stuck out his tongue, then slipped through the glass door that led outside.

The sky was splattered with stars that night and he could not help but sigh at the sight. His eyes traveled from the sky to the little vegetable garden Emmy was maintaining. Overlooking the garden was a small wooden garden set, and on one of the chairs sat Mr. Haww, his back to him, a glass of beer in one hand. He, too, seemed to be stargazing.

Clearing his throat, he approached him. "Nice night, isn't it?"

The older man nodded in the light that came from the old-fashioned lamp sitting on the table along with a small ice chest and a couple of unopened beer bottles. "Seldom get to see this nice a sky." He gestured to the empty chair across from him. "Sit. Let's drink together."

Dearka did so. For some unexplainable reason, he had lost all the nervousness of earlier. The bath must have relaxed him. The man poured him a glass and handed it to him. "You do drink, right?"

"Yes, sir I do. It's the only thing that keeps us sane during happy hour in the military."

That made him laugh. "I suppose it's tough. Such young men you are, and already you've went through so many things that you shouldn't have. Must be tough."

"Not really. What can't be changed must be endured."

"Probably. But then we have the free will to do what we think is right, regardless of the consequence." He turned to the tan boy, the light of the lantern casting shadows over his kind face. "That is why we are now experiencing this cease-fire." He took a sip of his beer, then nodded. "I don't know about you, but I am very proud of you."

Dearka smiled silently, looking down at the glass in his hand, then took a sip himself. The beer was cold. He took another sip. "Thank you, sir. Unfortunately, not everyone shares your opinion about me."

The man sighed and looked up into the sky. "Does it matter? I don't think it does."

The Buster pilot blinked. "I have no regrets."

"Good. That's all that matters." He turned to the younger boy. "Listen. About earlier, the question I asked you, it didn't scare you, did it?"

Dearka paused, trying to recall the question, then blushed, glad that it was dark enough that Mr. Haww didn't see. "It didn't scare me. Not really. It just..."

"Just what?"

"It just caught me off-guard. That's all."

"And why is that?"

Cupping the glass in both hands, Dearka shrugged. "She's your only daughter. And it's like you're giving her away this early. It was... definitely a surprise..."

With this, the man laughed more. He put the glass of beer down on the table. "This world isn't getting any better, and I'm not getting any younger. I don't see the reason why you shouldn't get engaged. We don't want anything to ruin that hope that you may have finally found the right one for you." He sniffed. "You really think that the war is over, son?"

"Isn't it?"

"Holy, no! This is merely the eye of the storm. The human heart is never satisfied. Out there, there will be other people who would hunger for power, dominance, superiority. Know this, son. The mere act of _existing _is a battle, a never-ending battle to survive."

"And the question you popped up during dinner has something to do with this, how?"

The man nodded slowly. "The mere act of searching for love in war is one of them obstacles that not everyone could emerge victorious. I for one am glad that you came into my daughter's life in the most perfect of timings, when she lost love, only to gain another. I like you. That's all there is to it."

Dearka frowned. "Most people think it's too soon."

"Heck! What do they know? Tell me, son. What does time have to do with anything about the affairs of the heart?"

"I... don't know. I guess it's the standard..."

"Standard, eh? I don't think that's a good enough excuse. To compare your level of recovery with others' is plain bull. All I know is that you saved my daughter from a lot of emotional grief, and for me, that's enough to know I can put my heart to rest even if she's away." He eyed him in the dim light of the lamp. "I trust you, son."

Dearka was left speechless for a few seconds before nodding hurriedly. "Thank you, sir."

With this, the older man looked up into the sky, and Dearka's eyes followed. The blanket of stars was a pretty sight. It made him wonder if the war ever existed. It was so peaceful here. And it frightened him, what Mr. Haww could be right about the war.

_They finally achieved peace, yet there are other people who would hunger for more... but what else could they ask for? What is it with power and superiority that people want it too much, even at the expense of many innocent lives?_

Sighing after taking another sip of his beer, he frowned. For the insatiable heart, he guessed it was never enough.

Cool hands touched his cheeks from behind, and when he looked up, Miriallia peered down at him, her pretty face so soft in the lamplight, smiling down at him. He smiled back, reaching up with his free hand to stroke her cheek. Mrs. Haww joined them a second later and sat down on the empty chair next to her husband.

Looking up into the sky once again, he pointed at what looked like a shooting star streaking in the distance.

"What did you wish for?" Miriallia whispered silently as she too saw the heavenly body.

"Nothing. Absolutely nothing." He reached for her hand and kissed her palm gently.

What was there to wish for? For him, this was more than enough

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_**Yuugiri: Dun-dun-DUN!**_

_**What could be the terrible news Murrue has in store for Cagalli and Athrun? (Gasps)**_

_**What could Kira be up to with the gown? (gasps)**_

_**What did that picture Yzak saw in Kari's locker mean? (gasps)**_

_**Oh, well... here's the update. Took me long enough... Sorry. This chappie was a bit slow again, but I guess I couldn't help it. (starts creaming) My brain! MY BRAIN!!!! YEEEEAAAAAARGH!!!**_


	24. Phase 24: A Cabbage for a Butterfly

_**Disclaimer: I do not won Gundam SEED. **_

_**July 18, AW :: 7:05 am**_

"Yzak, have you seen my…" Kira's voice died in his throat as he came out of his room, toothbrush in hand, into the living area where a shirtless Yzak was sitting on the carpeted floor, a towel thrown over his head, and his eyes were staring at nothing else but at the object that was apparently MIA from the Freedom pilot's study table; his laptop.

The Duel pilot grunted as he briefly looked up at him, then back to the laptop monitor, punching in a few keys then frowning, his left hand flying to his chin, tapping his nose with his index finger while his right hand was running along the space bar of the keyboard.

Kira stared at his new roommate in amazement. "Didn't you sleep? You've been on that thing since last night."

And he was not exaggerating. The moment Yzak had come in from the library, he immediately changed in his room (Dearka's former quarters) and immediately asked him if he wouldn't use his laptop. Honestly, he was in fact using it for the written report he was going to pass later today along with the doll, but since he was hoping to make his and Yzak's stay together as smooth as possible, he let him borrow the laptop.

The only problem now was that he wouldn't give it back.

The last Kira had seen of his laptop was when Yzak inserted a CD in it and had been playing this odd game like a madman. Sitting in the middle of the carpet, Kira was already having suspicions that the light-haired boy had actually grown roots and anchored himself on the floor, leaving it only for occasional visits to the bathroom.

Despite the fact that he had a lot of things in his mind to be bothered by whatever _'episode' _Yzak was having, curiosity finally got the best of him. Making his way behind the Duel pilot, he leaned forward, his hands on his knees, looking over the light-haired boy's shoulders.

It was nothing he had expected Yzak to be interested in. It looked like one of those old-fashioned twenty-first century computer games developed for non-simulated consuls, running on the lowest possible RAM anyone could possibly make it run on in this time, yet here was Yzak, scattering his brains into oblivion over a game that did not look at all interesting.

On the monitor was a colorfully designed image of the planet Earth, and orbiting around it were small, three-dimensional ships that looked very much like the Archangel. Kira gave the developer, whoever he was, some credit there. The war ships were very detailed and realistic. But what blew him away were the several space colonies shown to him after Yzak pressed a few buttons. IT was obviously a war game.

The frontlines of miniature robots guarding the intricately designed Space Colonies suddenly advanced on the Archangel look-alikes, completely disintegrating them in a matter of seconds.

Yzak screamed bloody murder. "_Nooooooooooooooooooooooo!_"

Kira cringed inwardly, slightly backing away from the boy as he slumped his head on the laptop's keyboard. Looking over the Duel pilot's head of hair to the monitor, he saw plain black and white letters that read GAME OVER swerve in front of the scene of exploding ships and flying mobile suits.

Kira, not knowing what to do next, did the first thing that came into his mind; he poked Yzak hard, jabbing him in between the shoulder blades with his toothbrush.

There was no response from him, except for a loud grunt.

Kira was disgusted. "What the heck have you been doing all night?"

Yzak raised his head to give the Freedom pilot a deadly look. "Trying to win this friggin' game but failing miserably. What else could I be doing, genius?"

Sighing helplessly, Kira snapped his laptop shut and was about to whisk it away when Yzak's hand suddenly slammed itself over the device. Kira almost screamed in terror for the welfare of his precious laptop.

"I'm not done yet," Yzak shrilled, letting out a small giggle. He reopened the laptop eagerly.

Kira recoiled at the sight of Yzak's face. His eyes were so unnaturally alert, wide and pretty much darting from one place to another. He looked like someone who was under the influence of something really nasty; like a jar of sugar or something

Slowly edging away from him, Kira flopped down on the sofa and watched Yzak restart the game all over again.

He observed him for a few moments until it got really boring, as the Duel pilot just sat there, cursing madly after getting hit by a few missiles. Grumbling a bit after getting denied of something he knew for a fact he deserved anyway, Kira decided that he will not get anything done by waiting for his turn, so he got dressed, stuffed all the things he needed into a backpack and started off for the AU library.

That Monday morning was one of the most beautiful mornings Kira had ever had since their stay in Abashiri. The sun was shining quite heartily, accompanied with a gentle but cool breeze coming in from the lake. A good day to walk. Which was something he could not have avoided anyway. The town, he knew, was packed with people and booths and tents for the Summer Festival tonight, rendering the streets anything but passable by vehicles.

Kira did not mind. Taking the long way through the stone park that led straight to the path around the city proper, a song on his lips, he skipped along, his backpack slung over one shoulder.

There were so many things he was looking forward to, so many things he had been anticipating since last night.

Today, at six in the afternoon, he was either going to be the happiest man on earth, or the most miserable one.

Today, at six in the afternoon, Lacus was either going to forgive him, or crush his heart completely.

Remarkably, he was feeling confident. Maybe it was because of the short walk from the supermarket last night. Lacus had not even tried to make up some lame excuse to get rid of him. She even looked relieved to see him then. And she didn't pull away when he held her hand.

Scowling slightly at the memory of Yalin and his perfect teeth, he kicked a small pebble on the path, sending it catapulting a few hundred feet in front of him. He normally would have gone all passive over something like this, but he had so little going for him right now that he believed he could not afford any more losses.

Lacus was too important to lose...

_I won't let it happen. Not again... Not now..._

Making his way though the strangely empty park, he started to feel good at the memory of his planning for today. Everything was going to be all right. He just knew it. Nothing – absolutely nothing – could go wrong today.

Smiling to himself, he sped up to a jog, hoping that the library was empty as he found it hard to concentrate when around many people. He was not disappointed. By the time he got to AU, everyone appeared to have concentrated their attention in the soccer field, bustling about with final touches on the tents and the small stage where Lacus and Athrun were supposed to perform. Smiling crookedly at the thought of Athrun playing the piano, he set off to the library but was distracted by something moving quite suspiciously in the gym.

He hated that place. It was a constant reminder of him being an ass. But still, his enhanced eyesight immediately defined who it was rummaging inside the gym. Kira wasted no time and hurried up to greet her.

"Kari. I knew it was you."

The reddish-blond haired girl turned to him immediately from the huge machine that did wonders to Kira's nervous system. The MemS, ever so innocently sitting there in the middle of the deserted gym like old flight simulators, were there, another constant reminder of Kira's biggest mistake in the world.

"Why, hello there. You're up early today," Kari said, wiping her slightly dirty hands on a white towel hanging from her neck. Her shoulder-length hair was pulled back by a small beret at one side, a few wisps framing her smooth face. She was wearing her usual ensemble of a loose yellow shirt and plain jeans, still no jewelry except for the three silver studs in each ear, but something was definitely different about her today... Ah, yes. She was wearing a smile.

Kira nodded to her and then the machines. "You seem busy. Am I interrupting something?"

"Oh, no. Not really. I'm practically done."

"You're doing some adjustments on it?"

"No. I was just trying to make sure it functioned well later for the festival."

And Kira fell silent. His gaze traveled from one of the MemS to the other, remembering all too well that incident not too long ago... He shook his head, trying to get rid of that undesirable memory of his stupidity.

Kari tilted her head to the right as she examined him critically. "Kira? What did you see in the MemS then? I had been very curious about it..."

This made Kira stiffen. He avoided her gaze and tried to shrug. He did not feel like explaining to her anything that he did see in it not because he didn't want to, but because he felt like it was going to be a too-long explanation of things that mattered little at the moment. But as usual, Kari understood. So she changed the subject immediately.

"Say Kira?" she asked as she ran a hand over the cockpit of the nearest MemS and turned to him curiously.

The Freedom pilot stuffed his hands in his pockets and waited for her to continue.

"Do you believe in life after death?"

Kira was taken aback. "Huh?" Strange question. In all honesty, the thought never really crossed his mind. He shrugged. "I guess I haven't given it much thought... I've been given a lot of opportunities to find out, but I didn't actually give myself the chance to ask myself what would become of me after that... Why do you ask?"

She smiled her small smile, then shook her head slightly. She didn't answer his question, though, but instead asked another. "How about past lives? Do you believe in that?"

"Past lives? Like... like you used to be someone else before you die, and you start a life as someone else after death?" He could not foresee where the conversation was going. "I've found the topic very hard to pursue, actually. It gets too complicated at one point, since we have to believe in souls in order to believe that."

"Do you believe in souls, then?"

The memory of Fllay talking to him seconds after she died came back to him. "I do."

This made Kari straighten up. "Interesting. So you believe that all humans have a soul?"

"I suppose." Scratching his head confusingly, he let out a nervous laugh. "Are you all right? You're asking me odd questions."

This made her giggle, then she folded her arms to her stomach. "Forget I asked." She changed the topic smoothly. "Lacus has been anxious all night last night, telling me that you have something planned for her that involved many people and a gown. What are you planning?"

The thought of tonight made him smile brightly. Forgetting the weird conversation he just had with her, he put a finger over his lips and grinned. "It's a secret."

"A secret, you say?"

"Yes. Oh, well. I have to do something in the library. I'll be seeing you around."

Kira was about to run off to his destination when Kari suddenly stopped her. "Oh, wait."

The Freedom pilot turned to her. "Yeah?"

"Is Yzak in your dorm?"

Kira laughed. "He's planted himself of the floor of our living room. He's not going anywhere. Why?"

She shook her head. "Nothing."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Even before Cagalli had landed on the dry-docks, the news that the princess of Orb was finally coming home had spread like wildfire.

Unfortunately.

At the current state of unstable emotions regarding the post-war incident in the country, and with suspicions of other forces running around unknown in the vicinity, Kisaka was furious by the time they learned that everyone was anticipating Cagalli's first public appearance since the death of Uzumi Nala Attha.

Murrue could only shrug helplessly. _"I have nothing to do with the news. No one here said so much as boo regarding Cagalli's return," _she had said. Cagalli believed her.

That was yet another mystery she had to figure out... The last thing she needed was spies.

Cagalli shuffled through the papers stacked high on her desk and sighed, which immediately turned into a yawn. Groping around for the half-drained mug of black coffee sitting on the far edge of her side table also stacked with more papers, she looked over her shoulder to the low couch in the middle of the dark room where Athrun was sprawled on his stomach, head lightly resting on one hand, his shoulder-length dark hair fanned out on his arm. She smiled at the sight of his eyelids flickering slightly as if dreaming. He had insisted on keeping her company in her room, even after her insistence that he should go and retire in his own quarters. The Justice pilot had been running around all night since they arrived in the Attha mansion, talking to Murrue about matters that needed tackling at the soonest possible time and so the moment his head hit the couch, he was out like a light.

Cagalli, on the other hand, could not find the urge to sleep...

Not after when she had heard the _"news" _Murrue had in store for them.

Murrue hadn't wasted time in welcoming them back. The moment she saw Cagalli, she was all business. _"Information just got to me not a few hours ago about the ruckus about anti-Coordinators in this neutral nation of yours Cagalli. And you wouldn't like it. Do you remember the movements most civilians had during the time of the war? It seems that majority of them had found their way to this place along with humanitarian aid from other neutral nations."_

Cagalli was outraged. _"What the heck! I don't get it! Orb was destroyed by the Alliance! How could they manage to point this at Coordinators?"_

"_Apparently, this movement is, err... evangelizing that the war would never have begun if Coordinators didn't exist. Many are starting to believe them."_

"_What the...! That's absurd!"_

"_It's always easier to persuade a mind whose feelings are pretty much unstable at the moment. Majority of the people in Orb had relatives, husbands, wives and children in Heliopolis when ZAFT attacked. To them, that's all that matters. So the movement was able to convince the people of Orb that if it weren't for them, none of this would have happened."_

"_Fabulous. So who is leading the movement?"_

"_I'll pretend you didn't ask that."_

"_Oh, God no!"_

"_I have suspicions that Blue Cosmos has something to do with it. But don't worry. Kisaka has somehow tracked them down and booted them off the country. All you have to do is convince your people otherwise. I don't know how you'd do it, but you'd better do it right…"_

"_So I do have to make a public appearance?"_

"_And make a speech to ease out troubled nerves. I'm sorry you have to be the one to do this, but your people are anxious to hear what you have to say."_

Cagalli rubbed her eyes tiredly and slumped her forehead on her desk, groaning inwardly. The news that Blue Cosmos was actually trying to split this country into two, however, was remarkably the lesser evil of two announcements Murrue had in store for her.

The greater was the announcement that two people had been waiting for her arrival ever since they had a whiff of the rumor that she was coming home. And those two people were none other than Haruma and Caridad Yamato; Kira's parents...

"_They've been waiting for news about Kira so much that I simply couldn't turn them away... They said they would want to request audience with you as soon as you are rested and well enough to talk to. So I told them to return in the morning. I don't know what they want from you, but the mother was crying and the father was hyperventilating already," _Murrue had said, almost a touch of amusement in her voice.

The situation, to Cagalli, was even more difficult to handle than the Blue Cosmos. All she needed to do with those anti-Coordinator freaks was to find them and root them out, which was pretty much done for her by Kisaka himself. This, on the other hand, had to be dealt with gently… She knew how parents could overreact about everything…

Cagalli raised her head when she felt warm hands slowly caress her shoulders. Looking up and leaning her head back, she saw Athrun looking down at her sleepily. She smiled up at him and closed her eyes in pleasure at his slow and gentle massage. "That's it. You're fired, Athrun," she murmured.

Athrun laughed. "What? I'm no longer your bodyguard? How will I eat? Where will I sleep?"

"I'm rehiring you to be my personal therapist."

This made him laugh even more. "You haven't slept a wink, have you?"

"Not a one. And I feel like my eyelids are ten tons heavier."

Athrun's hands left her shoulders and started to massage her temples. "The last thing we want is for you to get sick. You can't afford that at this time. Not with two desperately anxious parents waiting to talk to you in three or so hours…"

"Don't remind me…"

"Is it that bad?"

Cagalli shivered at the degree of his ignorance. It was definitely that bad. Ever since the Archangel had left Orb, Alaska-bound, Kira had not even said one word to his parents about anything. Not even a goodbye. The only thing he did want them to know was that he was sorry... Cagalli was the unfortunate messenger, and she had watched Mrs. Yamato break down into tears then... But nothing could have been worse than the time they had received news of Kira's apparent '_death'_. She had flown all the way from Orb to search for him, but not after she had once again been given the task of telling his parents of their son's current state. Mrs. Yamato had fainted then, and her husband broke down crying...

And now, here she was again, given the task to talk to his parents...

Leaning her head on Athrun's stomach, she groaned as his hands slowly ran down her neck, easing out the tight muscles there. "It's not like they're hard to talk to... but it's just that... I don't really know what to say to them."

"It's just Kira. What can you not say about him that his parents would want to know?"

But of course, it was not Athrun's fault that he did not know how difficult it is for her to explain probably for the third time in the span of three months to Kira's parents why their son didn't want to see them... Maybe it was because Cagalli found the excuse Kira had given her – that he was in the military already – as something not anyone could understand easily. In the time they had lived together in Abashiri, Kira hadn't so much as said a word about his feelings about them, especially after the discovery in space...

Once again, the memory of her and Kira's conversation in the Archangel infirmary on their way back to Earth flooded her brain with horrid thoughts of the truth that had been concealed from them for sixteen years. Kira was not born into this world as any normally was born. Kira had talked to her about everything La Cruset revealed to him, although majority of which, he wanted to forget. She herself had asked many times over if she was in fact the biological daughter of Uzumi Nala Attha, after that talk that they had. Many times, the question boggled her mind, until one day she discovered that she really didn't care... She didn't care of her past anymore. Just her future.

What frightened her was if Kira felt the same way...

She took Athrun's hands and guided them back on her shoulders, which he gladly thumbed gently. "Athrun, can you do me a favor?"

"Anything. What is it?"

"I don't want to see the Yamatos today."

"Huh? But - ?"

"I want you to go to Kisaka and tell him personally to have a shuttle ready for two people bound for Abashiri, Hokkaido Japan. I think it's about time Kira stopped running away from them."

Athrun did not hesitate and nodded, and after a few seconds decided to change the subject. "By the way, Kisaka had given me more of the reports of the requests of the citizens in the northern parts of Orb. Have you seen them?"

Cagalli grunted at the question. She knew exactly what he was talking about. Some citizens were requesting for a grand memorial for the people they have lost in the war. "That folder had gone directly to the trash can."

Athrun was taken aback. "You're not going to grant them a memorial? Isn't that a bit improper?"

"Why would that be improper?"

"Majority of your people want to commemorate those lives offered in the war. As well as your father's death. I think you should put at least that into consideration."

"Athrun, our funds are not sufficient enough to support a grand memorial. If it weren't for the financial aid the other neutral nations are bringing in, we wouldn't be able to keep afloat the constructions. I think it would be a wiser decision if we prioritize the living than the dead. I'm sure they will understand. Once very single thing is put into order, then that's when we will grant the memorial."

And then they fell silent.

Cagalli took the chance to enjoy the easing massage, until she felt something warm pressing up against her left cheek. Athrun had planted a small kiss while she was unaware. She laughed. "All right, what was that for?"

He pulled away then smiled, his eyes looking away to the stack of papers on the desk, his hands gripping her shoulders tightly. "For being a good and wise Princess... You will do your father proud."

Cagalli smiled sadly. "I hope so." When she noticed his hands lay still on her shoulders, she poked Athrun's stomach, making him jump. "You're slacking on the job, Zala."

"Yes, ma'am. Sorry, ma'am."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Miriallia groggily opened her eyes and stretched as she pushed herself into a sitting position on her mattress. It was strange having to wake up to such familiarly comforting surroundings after so long. Her room was bathed in soft morning sunlight pouring through the white lace curtains draped over the wide open windows overlooking the small vegetable garden her mother was maintaining. She was about to bury her head back into the covers when she heard voices floating up from the garden below.

Slowly slipping out of her bed, she made her way to the near window and suddenly felt her heart beating fast in her chest at what she saw. Her mother was crouched in front of the cabbage patch, wearing a plain brown dress and her white apron, laughing along with a very happy–looking Dearka clad in a loose gray shirt and sweatpants.

Propping her elbow on the windowsill and resting her chin on her palm, she listened to their conversation with a smile tugging at her lips.

"There's a caterpillar on that cabbage, Emmy!" Dearka pointed out.

"I know, dear. Leave it alone."

"But you killed several earlier because you said it'll eat the leaves of the cabbage."

"Yes, that is true. But if we kill them all, what will become butterflies?"

And Dearka fell silent. Miriallia stifled a giggle.

She watched Dearka squat next to her mother and scratch his head in confusion. "I don't get it. What about your vegetables if we let that one survive?"

"Sometimes, dear, we have to sacrifice some important things to attain others that will be of greater value to us."

Dearka was really confused. "So you'd sacrifice a cabbage for a butterfly?"

Miriallia held back her laughter at the sight of her boyfriend's face.

She saw her mother shake her head ruefully and stood up, a small basket of freshly picked vegetables in one hand. "Yes, dear. That is correct. Well, I am going to prepare breakfast."

"Do you need help?" Dearka offered.

"No, dear. Stay here and catch a few rays. It will do you good." And her mother disappeared into the house, leaving the Buster pilot standing in the middle of the garden, a crossed look on his handsome, bronze face.

Miriallia placed her fingers in her mouth and blew a sharp whistle to attract his attention.

Dearka's head shot up and she could see his face brighten at the sight of her. "Good morning!" he called, waving a bit and approaching the window where she was standing over.

"Hi," she said, returning his wave. "You're up early."

This made Dearka smile. "Your father woke me up at around five to run with him around the block."

Milly frowned, noticing the boy's shirt was not even the least bit stained with sweat. "You don't look like you ran."

"That's because we didn't. Somewhere between the house and the block, he changed his mind and we went walking along the lake instead."

"You don't say."

He grinned. "He told me you almost drowned a cat in that lake."

Miriallia blushed at the memory. "Hey, I was six then. You don't have to blame me for that one."

"Yeah, well your father said the cat got its revenge by scratching every inch of bare skin on you."

Miriallia groaned inwardly. She had to make sure to stash all her baby pictures out of hand's reach later. _I'll kill you, dad._

"All right, enough about the cat," she injected, straightening up and pinning a glare at him. "I'm going to make sure you two never get to take walks together without me."

Dearka laughed at her. "Whatever you want, Miriallia."

She stuck out her tongue at him before finally backing off the window and getting out of her pajamas and into a comfortable worn tee and loose shorts. She met Dearka in the middle of the garden. He kissed her gently on the cheek. She gave him a sloppy kiss on the mouth, then proceeded to the garden set where they had talked the night before and settled on the now empty table, crossing her legs under her.

"I hope my parents aren't driving you up the wall yet," she said, motioning for Dearka to sit down on the chair right in front of her.

The Buster pilot immediately complied, settling himself comfortably on the chair. "Hardly. I think I might actually kidnap your mother to take with me to PLANT, when I go back."

This made her cock her head to the right, examining his face intently. Questions that have been haunting her thoughts for some time now once again cascaded down the wall of her consciousness. "Dearka?"

"Yeah?"

"I don't mean to be nosy. But I was wondering... Where are your parents?"

The Buster pilot was immediately taken aback, an unreadable expression crossing his boyish face.

Miriallia blinked her eyes, suddenly unsure if she had asked the right question. Come to think of it, Dearka hadn't said anything about his family ever since they arrived on Earth. Or ever, once you think about it. He was just the lone soldier who appeared to have no origin that she knew of. Even Yzak had shown signs of surviving kin in the PLANTs. She began to wonder... Did he lose his family in the destruction of Junius 7?

Dearka looked at her, gathering her slippered feet and resting it on his knees, somehow wanting to ease the obvious discomfort that had seeped into her façade.

Swallowing hard, she let her hands fall on her knees. "I'm sorry. You don't have to answer that question."

He smiled at her sadly, then looked away, turning his face up into the bright sky. "My father is one of the twelve Council Members of the PLANTs. He's assigned in the administrative committee in Februarius City specializing in Biochemistry. You see, in the PLANTs, there are two dominant factions in the council then; the Radicals and the Moderates. Unlike Ezaria, Yzak's mother, who was a radical, my father was the kind to be on the neutral side, but sometimes sways along with Lacus' father, hoping that the war would end with prosperous means." He had a detached grin on his face as he shrugged. "He's probably busy with work as the Council seems to be quite unstable right now… He's always busy… Always doesn't have the time for his family. But he's a nice guy anyways, so no problem there."

Miriallia's hand started to tug at her ear, as she would when deep in thought. "You haven't even called him? Not even once?"

This made the boy laugh. "He wouldn't have the time."

"Not even for you?"

He laughed. "Especially for me."

This made Milly frown, but even before she could open her mouth to ask about his mother, Mrs. Haww's head popped out from the glass door.

"Dear, an Athrun Zala is on the phone. He wants to talk to you and Dearka... He sounds urgent, though. You'd better hurry."

Dearka was up on his feet at the description her mother gave Athrun, his brow furrowing in confusion. "Athrun?"

Miriallia hopped down the table and cast a worried look at the Buster pilot. _Oh, goodness... What could it be this time?_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Yzak couldn't take it anymore. He was going crazy over something so petty that it was starting to sound pathetic. Here he was, wasting his time over a computer game, when he could simply just... just... just do anything but play that stupid computer game!

Watching the screen once again parade block letters that read GAME OVER in front of his face, he finally decided to give up. Pulling out a notepad from under the coffee table and jotting down a few notes about the game, he grumbled to himself on why he even bothered to do this for Kari...

_For a weird reason, I could never say no to you..._

She had asked him to critic the game that she helped develop. And although the technical aspect of the game, like graphics and the like, were top-notch, he could not help but irk at the generic plot line and the undeniable fact that **_no one _**could possibly win it!

The game was about two forces of equal power and artillery that were at war, and the goal was to end the feud of the two sides. It was too cliche, and all too familiar. It was like the exact same happenings in the war. And although in the game, you were allowed to choose which side you wanted to play, (and Yzak had already tried both sides three times in alternate) it seemed like there was no point in trying hard. The game was too realistic to be won.

First of all, each side had a limited number of rations that expired over time, so not only were you pressured to battle very clever NPC's, but you had to work under time pressure, because if you didn't hurry, it would either cause your forces to starve or eventually file for discharge papers from waiting too long for your decisions. There was this one time when he had to go to the toilet, and when he got back, twelve of his Mobile Suit pilots actually squirmed out of their ranks!

The next problem was that every time he fired one missile, the enemy would always seem to retaliate four times stronger than his initial attack. Yzak decided that this could be forgiven, since the game always started with making him strike the first blow. It was imperative that the enemy would strike back even more, either out of anger or out of fear.

But still, it was just a game, and he seriously believed that no one who will play this would enjoy it. It will definitely not sell. Who in this forsaken world wanted to get his ass kicked every turn?

Tapping the tip of the pen on the notepad noisily, he stared at the devastation in the monitor before finally being struck with a perfect strategy. Restarting the game, he played it again for a full hour and was starting to finally destroy the frontlines of his opponents. So far, he was left with three weeks of food and water rations for a fleet of twelve hundred, and the enemy was finally forced to take refuge behind the moon.

Letting out a victory yell, Yzak pumped his fist in the air like an idiot. "Hah! Take that, enemy scum!" he cried madly, elated at having finally gotten this far in the game without getting too maimed to set off for the next level. He had finally cornered the enemy into their deaths!

He was about to punch in a few commands to order his fleet to advance when he heard someone knock on the door.

"It's open!" he called, thinking that it could be Kira, back already from his little library excursion.

He heard the door open, but almost jumped out of his skin at the sound of the voice that greeted him.

"I see you're very intent in finishing my game," she said, slowly and quietly closing the door behind her. Yzak leaped to his feet, and catching himself, he pretended like he didn't care who she was. He immediately settled on the floor once more.

The problem was, he did care.

And suddenly, Yzak became utterly conscious of his clothes. Or the lack of it. Here he was, bare to the waist, a dirty bath towel over his messy, messy hair and Kari, who looked positively divine in her simple yet strangely appealing loose shirt and jeans, every single strand of her lovely hair combed into perfection.

Kari did not seem to mind. Not even looking at him, she kneeled down on the floor, tucking her feet under her and setting her eyes on the monitor. "Interesting. You have gotten this far already?"

Yzak, trying desperately to smoothen out his nerves, grunted as he boastfully pressed a few keys on the keyboard. "I have them exactly where I want them."

Kari squinted in the monitor, digesting the fact that the enemy was indeed hiding behind the moon. "What are you going to do?"

"Blast them to kingdom come, of course!"

She frowned, her smooth face scrunching up in thought. "If you do that, you'll destroy the lunar base... " She right- clicked on the small moon base and gasped. "You sent the civilians you've saved there, Yzak! The enemy isn't hiding from you! It's holding your civilians hostage!"

Yzak snorted, waving her protest away. "Like it would matter. The goal is to win the battle. It didn't even mention that I had to rescue the civilians. So I just sent them there because it's the only base that had enough oxygen supply for all of them. Sheesh! I didn't know that they were important."

Kari blinked at him disbelief. "Yzak, every single life in the game is important. Is this how you usually deal with civilians in real life?"

"What?! No!"

She shook her head. "You're going to sacrifice the lives of the civilians for your victory?"

This got Yzak awfully depressed. She was making him look like an inhuman little fart. He pressed the escape button, ending the game completely. "It's just a game, Kari..." he mumbled silently, somehow getting embarrassed at his behavior over it. "Not a very good game at that." He handed the notepad he had been taking notes with, then leaned his head on the armrest of the couch. "Those are the comments I have on the game. Don't get mad at me for being too blunt. You asked for my help so don't get mad at me for being honest about what I think about it."

The girl nodded, not even bothering to look at the notes, and instead placed it on the table in front of her then smiled at him. "Thank you."

Yzak sniffed. "Whatever. Hard game... You should really consider revising it."

She lowered her chin to her chest, eyeing him through her lashes that Yzak noticed to be really long and thick. Swallowing hard, the Duel pilot pulled the towel off of his head. She was doing it again, _reading _him

He definitely could not understand why he felt like this in front of her. Each time, he worried what she would think about him, wondering for the millionth time that week why she never even got offended when he tried to drive her away with his sarcasm. Not only once had he asked himself what she thought of him.

As he looked back at her, daring himself to stare at her in the eye and not look away, he felt like he would give almost everything to know...

The next thing that happened however, caught him off-guard.

Kari's hand flew from her lap to Yzak's forehead. Out of reflex – or out of nervousness, Yzak did not know – his own hand intercepted her wrist, grabbing it tight even before her fingers brushed his brow.

Kari gasped, frightened, her sea of green orbs widening in surprise at the pressure he grasped her tiny wrist with.

"You have a bit of hair standing on end..." she murmured her silent explanation, her eyes looking at where his hands clasped her forearm.

Yzak felt his heart race as he too followed her gaze. What the heck was he doing!?

_Let go, Yzak! Let go!_

But he couldn't.... and he didn't even know why...

Kari was starting to get nervous. "Yzak? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to startle you. Please let go of me..."

_Thump! Thump! Thump! Thump! _His heart was going crazy! He had to let go of her now! But his brain just wouldn't function well...

"Yzak?" she asked meekly.

The Duel pilot took a deep breath, trying to fill his lungs with as much air as he could fill it with, because if he didn't, he was afraid he wouldn't be able to breath after what he felt like doing.

"Kari?" he rasped, squeezing her wrist slightly, then slowly pulling her closer.

"Yzak?"

The light-haired boy shook his head. "I hate you." And with that, he leaned forward, hurriedly planting his lips on hers even before she could utter another word.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

By six in the afternoon, Lacus was already bathed and dressed, a coat over the beautiful gown Kira had gotten for her. She did not know what the heck Kira was up to with this, and she would be lying if she told herself she was not excited.

Making her way through the empty path that ran behind the gym, she could hear the faint songs and muffled laughter of people in the soccer field, enjoying the Summer Festival that had been postponed before because of the rain. She walked past the shadows the setting sun was casting on the pavement and wondered where Kira was. She wasn't too early, was she? She did not have a watch with her, and except for the paper bag where she had stuffed the sequined tiara she decided not to wear after all, there really wasn't anything she could turn to for the time.

Looking around, she started to worry if Kira was going to stand her up.

Her worries were momentarily distracted when she felt something tugging at her coat. Looking down to find out what it was, she ended up staring at big brown eyes that sparkled with evident excitement. It was a little girl. Her brown hair was pulled back into two braids, wearing an orange dress that was apparently too big for her.

"I'm looking for princess Lacus. Are you princess Lacus?" she squeaked, tugging at her coat again.

Lacus giggled. "Well, I am Lacus. But the princess thing is something I have yet to figure out, all right?" She kneeled down in front of the girl, placing a hand on her shoulder. "What's your name, little girl?"

"Eiko!" she gushed, then shyly lowered her head, but still looked at her with those lovely eyes. "You're pretty.... Just like big brother Kira said..."

Lacus blinked at what the girl said. _Big brother Kira? _She tilted her head to the right. "Do you know where Kira is?"

Eiko nodded enthusiastically, then grabbed Lacus' hand. "Follow me, Princess Lacus!"

The songstress got to her feet and let the little girl lead her by the hand.

Eiko took small steps towards a small squat building a few paces away from the back of the studio, where she knew Sai and Kazui had spent their time trying to finish their kiddie show. She had never been there before. She was about ask Eiko if they were going inside the building when the girl suddenly turned to her then whispered.

"Princess Lacus?"

Lacus leaned down and whispered back. "What?"

"Kira and I are supposed to get married."

This made Lacus pause a bit, then giggle. "Really?"

The child nodded. "Yes. But you know, if big brother Kira would like you better, I will allow you to get married. I promise I won't mind."

This made Lacus laugh loudly. "But I thought you and Kira are going to get married?"

Eiko wrinkled her nose. "Nah. I decided that he's too old for me." And they started to walk to the building again. "This is the orphanage."

Lacus missed a step at the introduction of the building, and she ended up stopping in mid-stride. "Eiko…? You… live here?"

The girl nodded happily, squeezing her hand gently. "This is my new home now! I like it here better than in Heliopolis. I have so many friends here and we have slumber parties every night! And I can see the ocean from here, too!"

The songstress felt her heart skip a beat as she looked down at the little girl. "Eiko? Where are your mommy and daddy?"

The girl grinned more and Lacus' eyes moistened as she watched the girl touch her tiny chest, pointing to her heart. "They're right here with me."

Lacus nodded sadly, squeezing the little child's hand tightly. "I know they are, sweetie." She too touched her heart, suddenly remembering her own father and mother. It's been a while since she actually thought about them… "So are mine."

Giving her a toothy grin, little Eiko pulled her along and into the orphanage.

Lacus let her drag her off into the presently very dark building into a room that looked like a playpen for children, what with all the toys and books shoved against the walls, making a fairly broad space in the middle, where Kira sat on a single ladder-back chair with flowered padding. The room was dimly lit with small candles at strategic places, somehow creating a certain mood in the place, and Lacus could not help but gasp as she saw about a dozen children sitting on the floor, all staring up at Kira, who had his head down, eyes intent on the small piece of paper in his hand.

Lacus stopped dead on her tracks and looked down at Eiko. "What is this?"

The little girl disengaged her hold from her hand then nodded at the brown-haired Coordinator in the middle of the room. "Big brother Kira is going to tell us what will happen to the princess and the knight."

_The what?_

She watched as Eiko hurriedly joined her friends around the chair, and Lacus pulled the coat tighter around her, wondering why Kira wanted her to be there in this dress.

But what confused her more was when he started to tell the story. It seemed as if he started somewhere in the middle of it.

Kira cleared his throat and began. "So the war was finally over and the peace was restored to both kingdoms."

There were a few scattered _oooohs _and _ahhhhs _from the group of kids and Lacus tilted her head to the right, listening to what Kira had to say.

"And since everyone was happy, Sir Kira brought Princess Lacus with him to the kingdom of Earth."

Lacus blinked. Sir _who_? Princess _who_?

"But since Sir Kira is a dumb-ass and he let his past rule him because of a death that could not be avoided, he chased Princess Lacus away, breaking her heart and his own..." Kira looked up at her, and Lacus immediately looked away. She heard Kira continue with his story after a loud _boo _from the crowd for _Sir Kira's _apparent _stupidity_.

"But one day, an evil prince suddenly came and kidnapped Princess Lacus! He took her because she was from the kingdom of PLANT, and this prince wanted to kill her!"

Eiko squealed in excitement. "Oooh! Oooh! Rescue her, Sir Kira!!!"

Kira turned to the little girl. "Well, you see, he would have, but since Sir Kira thought himself as worthless for having let this other girl die before, he couldn't find the strength in him to get up and save her."

There was another round of _boooos _in the crowd, and Lacus raised her hand to her face, somehow anticipating what the story will reveal to her.

A blonde child shook his head in disappointment. "That can't be right. I want this to be a happy ending."

Laucs blushed when she saw Kira glance at her again.

"So do I, Makoto. So do I," Kira said, returning his eyes to the piece of paper in his hand. "But suddenly, just when everyone thought all was lost, something strange came over Sir Kira, magically awakening his mind to the reality that Princess Lacus was in danger!"

The kids jumped up and down on their seats. "What power? What power?" Eiko demanded.

Kira sighed, somehow bracing himself to what he had to say next. "Love, Eiko. He woke up one day, and after so long, his mind finally registered what his heart had been telling him for so long a time already. He could not live one more day without her..."

This extension of the story, however, brought out different reactions from the kids. While the girls all giggled and swooned, the guys all made disgusted faces and were scratching their heads in embarrassment.

Lacus did not know what to say. It was as if her heart had suddenly stopped beating, and now she couldn't breathe. Gripping the doorframe to steady herself as her knees wobbled at the sudden turn of even of the story, she gulped. She, a lover of fairytales and children's stories, is being thrown into a loop by one!

Kira cleared his throat, then, without looking at the piece of paper in his hand, he stood up, all the kids getting to their feet as well. "So the knight rode his horse to rescue his beloved, hoping it wasn't too late to beg for her forgiveness. He vanquished the evil prince and whisked Princess Lacus away with him into the sunset." The Freedom pilot stared hard at Lacus, too many emotions swimming in those deep, deep eyes. Those eyes... she had always thought them to be the most beautiful eyes in the galaxy...

Eiko, who was now standing next to Kria, grabbed his arm and tugged hard. "Then what happened, big brother Kira?"

And there was a hushed silence in the room, as if everyone was waiting for the ending.

When Kira didn't say anything, Eiko let go of his arm, then proceeded to Lacus' side, much to the songstress' surprise. The girl stopped right in front of her, those big brown eyes staring up at her pleadingly. "Do you know what's going to happen next, Princess Lacus?"

She could not find her voice then. She, who was usually so good when it came to words, was strangely speechless. She heard footsteps approaching her, and when she looked up, Kira was standing right in front of her, Eiko taking refuge behind his leg, clinging to his pants.

She could not do anything when Kira's hands slowly made their way to her shoulders, slipping off the coat that was enveloping the beautiful dress underneath. The sight of it made him smile. The other kids watching all murmured at the revelation that she was dressed like a princess. "You wore it."

She swallowed, then nodded nervously.

He folded the coat over his arm when all the kids gathered around them noisily, muttering about the ending of the story.

Kira dug in his pocket for something that Lacus started to dread about. This night was starting to bring too many surprises out of Kira. But the next thing that happened almost made her fall backwards. Kira produced a small, black, velvet box.

Lacus bit her lower lip anxiously as she eyes the little box.

Kira gently flipped it open, revealing a thin plain, sliver ring. Shyly, he got down on his knees, as how the princes in Cinderella and Snow White did when they finally meet their love, then held out the box to her. "Princess Lacus, I was hoping that maybe you could find it in your heart to forgive me." He smiled uncertainly. "You gave me a ring before I left for the final battle, and I came back to you as promised. This is for you, along with the hope that you'll have me back again..." His brow furrowed expectantly. "Please?"

As far as happy endings in fairytales were concerned, Lacus had never envisioned Kira to be like this at all... Her heart felt like it was going to explode any moment now... Gingerly, she held out her hand, and Kira's face suddenly lit up like a light. Hurriedly, he plucked the ring from the box, shakily took her hand in his and smoothly slipped the small silver band in her middle finger.

With this, the whole crowd of little kids erupted in unanimous cheer. Kira got up to his feet, but did not let go of Lacus hand. He blinked a few times. "Lacus? Please say something... anything... just let me know everything will be all right from now on... Please?"

The songstress laughed weakly in the noise of children laughing, and she leaned forward to whisper in his ear. "_And we lived happily ever after. The end._"

Kira wordlessly squeezed her hand.

She was about to say something else when suddenly, loud bangs ripped through the noise inside the orphanage, making the children squeal in delight.

Lacus looked at Kira. "What was that?"

The Freedom pilot grinned happily, ushering the kids to the exit with his free hand. "Fireworks! Let's go and watch." And he herded the kids off, but stopped her before she slipped out with them.

Lacus blinked questioningly as another round of fireworks sounded from the outside. "Yes?"

He looked at her for the longest possible time then shook his head. "Nothing. I just wanted to tell you that you look absolutely beautiful in a wedding dress."

Lacus felt faint. "I beg your pardon..."

Kira looked away, slightly embarrassed. "Ms. Lao, the caretaker of this orphanage told me I should give that to you. It was supposed to be her wedding dress... You look positively wonderful in it..."

Lacus felt her face heat up. _The dress, the ring... it was like..._

She immediately crushed the idea, before she got too ahead of herself, instead, leaned back and shyly said, "Thank you."

Kira tried to hide the obviously unwanted blush rising to his cheeks. "Well, let's go. We don't want to miss the fireworks."

"Absolutely." And, hand in hand, they slipped out of the orphanage and into the already dark night, illuminated by a shower of dazzling lights in the evening sky. The children where jumping up and down and squealing as another tadpole of light swam up from the grounds of the soccer field and exploded into a million little flowers in the air.

Lacus giggled happily. This was the best night she has ever had in her life! Leaning back as Kira wrapped an arm around her waist, she sighed in contentment as she watched the fireworks illuminate the young Coordinator's face. For the first time since she met him, he actually looked happy. Even his eyes...

Looking up again into the sky, watching another round of fabulous lights dancing so high in the heavens, she blinked her eyes curiously when she felt Kira stiffen next to her. Turning around to face him, she discovered he was no longer staring at the sky. Instead, he was eyeing two unfamiliar people standing but a few feet away from them. A woman and a man... And they looked like they had finally seen their long lost son...

Little did Lacus know that she was actually right...

Kira swallowed nervously, his hands falling to his side. "Mom? Dad?"

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

**_Yuugiri: Well here is the update! I will not make this author's note too long. I just want to greet you all a merry Christmas! I do hope that you will enjoy your holidays and thank you for the reviews on my last chappie. I appreciate it! (gives you all Christmas cookies and a glass of milk) We are almost half-way through with this story, as I have finally decided to keep it up to 50 phases, like the series. _**

_**Please tell me what you think. All your suggestions will be considered, however late they may be answered in the story. **_

_**Again, Merry Christmas!!!!**_


	25. Phase 25: What Matters Anyway?

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam SEED. **_

_**July 18, AW : evening**_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

"Mom? Dad?" Kira felt his throat tighten at the familiar sight of those two people standing a distance away from him and Lacus, who was looking at his face questioningly for a few minutes before finally following his gaze.

In the duration of his stay in Abashiri, he could not help but wonder why he never thought of his supposed parents in Orb, especially after having left them without saying goodbye before they left the Union. Cagalli never did say anything about them, but that was understandable. His sister probably did not know what to say about them in the first place. He himself didn't know what to say to them, not after what he heard up in space.

It was like waking up from the delusion that the only secret they were keeping from you was the reason why they made you a Coordinator. It turned out that there was an even bigger secret... So they really weren't his real parents.

His heart skipped a beat when he saw Caridad Yamato take a hesitant step froward, only to stop halfway, probably wondering if it was a good idea to approach their prodigal son.

Kira loved his mother. How could he not? She was probably the nicest mother there was in the entire world. He could not remember her ever losing her temper on him, not even when he accidentally broke her precious vase when he was three years old. Not to mention when she caught him sneaking out of his room to play with Athrun at ten in the evening when they were nine. Instead, she would simply just sit him down, calmly take him into her arms and tell him how nothing in this galaxy mattered to her more than him and so would appreciate it if he'd behave because she got too worried about him when he did mischief.

Kira swallowed hard at the memories of growing up with her beautiful face never changing, except for the few laugh-lines in the corners of her mouth, and the few gray hairs that had sprouted over the years. She had not changed at all since he last saw her. She still had the kindest eyes any mother could have. But now, looking at her, he discovered she had changed. She looked... tired.

Kira watched as Haruma Yamato place a hand on his mother's shoulder comfortingly, but equally hesitant. The Freedom pilot could not help but fight back a few tears at the sight of him.

His father was the best disciplinarian. And although he never used brute force on him, not even spanking him with a thin roll of newspaper, his words had always stayed with him until now. He was a hard worker, yet never ran out of time to play ball with his son on Sundays, and had been the one who insisted on their relocation to Heliopolis, fretting over the safety of his family.

He had taught him well, telling him words that he never could forget.

"_Kira, no matter what you are, you are not defined by your abilities alone... Remember that always... "_

Like his mother, he looked... older... more tired than the last time he saw him. But not the way he held his mother in his arms. They had always been this affectionate to each other. He had always been proud of that about them.

Kira felt someone tugging at his sleeve and looked down to see Lacus smiling at him encouragingly.

"Kira, I'm going to watch over Eiko and the rest, okay?" The songstress, without even waiting for a reply, disengaged herself from his embrace and hurried off, hitching her long, flowing skirt up to her knees, calling out to the bouncy children who obediently followed her to the back of the orphanage.

Suddenly left all alone in the silent and dark front lawn of the building, broken only by the occasional fireworks erupting in the cloudless sky, Kira turned to the couple who was now eyeing him uncertainly. Clearing his throat, he scratched his head somewhat shyly.

But even before he could open his mouth to say something, his face was muffled by his mother suddenly running to him and enveloping him in a stifling embrace. Kira could not believe how much he missed inhaling her familiar scent of lavender and milk soap. He closed his eyes, memories of her hugging him, telling him to stop crying after having fallen from a low branch of a tree and hurting his knee.

His mother uttered no words except for, "My boy... my little Kira... " in between uncontrollable sobs, her shoulders rising with every strained breath.

Shakily, Kira returned the hug, burying his face to her neck, as he had when he was young. "Hi, mom... Don't cry. Please."

He pulled away when he felt someone grip his arm tightly from behind. He looked over his shoulder and saw his father smiling down at him, his eyes moist and threatening to give way to tears. Kira almost gasped. His father never cried. Or at least not in front of him. "You've grown taller, son. And your hair is a mess." The older man reached out with a free hand, ruffling his mop of brown locks playfully.

Kira laughed as he brushed back the strands that fell over his eyes. "Hi, Dad."

It was the strangest feeling in the world, having to face your parents after discovering that they weren't your real parents after all... But then, what was a guy to do? He had been living a lie for sixteen years... not knowing that he was not an only child, but a twin, borne of a man who he didn't even know, and was heartless enough to sacrifice his family for a passion that eventually caused nothing but despair. To him, to many other people... How easy could it be to accept the reality, when he had been living the most perfect lie that formed the delusion that _he _was perfect? But then, he didn't know the whole truth still, now did he?

And if he ever did, was it right to blame his supposed parents, when all they did was take him in, an experiment treated with enough love and care and support to actually grow up normally and well? He had no one to blame. And even though he knew there were a lot of things he still needed to find out about what he was, he was surprised to find out that he really didn't care about the truth. The truth won't change anything, so it mattered little to him.

His parents cared for him so much, and that was all he could ask for.

_Somehow, everything is finally falling into place for me..._

He hugged, his mother tightly, sighing. "I'm sorry I ran off without saying goodbye. I promise I'll never do it again."

Loud bawling from his mother and a sniff from his father answered him. After that, the older man nudged him and murmured, "Aren't you going to introduce us to your lovely friend over there?"

Kira looked up just in time to see Lacus peeking from behind the wall, small heads of the kids, peeking right next to her. When the songstress found out she had been discovered, she let out a small yelp and quickly jumped, ready to duck out of sight. She was sabotaged by the kids as they shoved her from behind the wall, causing her to stumble forward clumsily, barely being able to stand on her feet, what with the dress snagging at her heels. The kids burst out laughing and scuttled hurriedly out of sight. Kira could hear them laughing all the way inside the backdoor of the orphanage.

The Freedom pilot gestured to Lacus, who looked left, then right, then pointed to her nose. "Me?"

This made Kira laugh. "Come here. My parents want to meet you."

His enhanced hearing caught her little squeak and she ambled her way towards them nervously. When she was near enough, he took her hand in his and pulled her in front of him to brag to his mom and dad. "This is Lacus Clyne. My… " And that was when all thought left his brain completely.

_What is Lacus in my life?_

He started to search for the right introduction for the pink-haired songstess, only to discover he found none.

But to his surprise, Lacus smiled sweetly, extended a hand to his mother and tilted her head to the right, pretty much how she usually did when she tried to assess a situation better. "Nice to meet you, Mrs. Yamato. I am Kira's girlfriend."

And his parents completely went crazy, with his mother letting out a loud exclamation, and his father immediately pummeling him on the shoulder, saying, "I'm proud of you, son!" over and over again as he fussed over Lacus, who was now giggling nervously, casting worried glances at Kira, then at the older folks.

Kira almost fainted then and there.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

"_Oh, God! Athrun_, **_HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP!_**"

Athrun almost flew down the hallway of the Attha mansion at the sound of Cagalli's scream echoing through the whole house. He was in the kitchen, getting something cold to drink, and after having abandoned the shattered glass of orange juice on the kitchen floor, he zoomed up the staircases and went straight to Cagalli's room where he knew she was, his heart ready to jump out of his chest at the possibility of anything harming her while he wasn't there.

"Cagalli!" he yelled as he slammed himself against her door, completely busting it open, sending him reeling into the blue carpets of her sleeping quarters, rolling a few times on the ground, then ending up on his back with a grunt.

To his surprise, and much to his bewilderment, Cagalli stood there in the middle of the room, wearing a long flowing green dress, her hands hidden behind her back, and an expression on her pretty face that looked like a cross between annoyance and desperation.

_She doesn't look hurt. She seems all right… Good._

Getting up to his feet, he hurried to her side. "What happened? I heard you all the way from the other wing."

She whimpered a bit and turned around, her left hand pointing to the zipper of her dress. "I can't get it off," she whined.

Athrun stared at her for a full five seconds before finally bursting out laughing. "That's it?"

Cagalli whirled around, her lower lip jutting out defiantly. "What do you mean that's it? I can't get the dress off, Zala… " she moaned and trailed off whimpering silently.

Athrun shook his head in frustration as he gripped her by the shoulders and twirled her around. "Now, don't panic. I'll get it off. Why on Earth were you wearing a dress, anyway? I thought you hated dresses."

"I was trying some stuff on for the Public Appearance Kisaka scheduled. And now I can't get this off!" Cagalli explained as she brushed her hair off the nape of her neck to clear a path for his hands to open the zipper.

Chuckling softly, the Justice pilot fiddled with the dress, carefully zipping it down. "That's in two days, right? Are you done with your speech yet?"

She shook her head, sighing in gratitude as Athrun finally freed her from the offending dress. "I haven't even started. And I know that I should be really careful with what I say up there… ugh… I'm going to bomb… I just know it."

Cagalli had always been very nervous when it came to formalities. For someone who was born a princess, she sure was having a hard time adjusting to the fact that she was burdened with a responsibility of being the heir of Orb Union. And although it was relatively a small country to manage, for someone who was as inexperienced as she, it was going to be a handful. Fortunately, the major houses in the country seemed to be cooperating, having been undeniably responsible for the development of the Mobile Suits in Heliopolis. It was smooth sailing for them, except for the part when Cagalli had to officially declare that she will be taking after her father's wake.

This was one of the questions Athrun had about the hierarchy of the country. Unlike in the Council up in PLANT, the next chairman was elected officially by the majority of the Big Twelve. Here, it appeared to be appointed by the dominant houses.

"You're not going to bomb. You'll do fine." Athrun gestured to the open dressing room at the other end of her sleeping quarters, prying his eyes away from the incredible amount of exposed skin he could see from the now open zipper of her dress. "Now go and get dressed. Dearka and Miriallia are on their way for the favor you asked of them. I suggest you ask Milly for help with the dress you're going to wear. Maybe it'll be easier that way." He turned away, a flush creeping up his face as Cagalli looked at him. She was holding on to the front of her dress to keep it from falling off.

She eyes him with slit eyes. "Why are you blushing?"

Athrun waved his hands as if to explain. "Your dress might fall off."

Cagalli growled. "What? You don't want to see me without a dress?"

"What? No! I mean, yes! I mean…"

"You think my body isn't good enough to look at?"

Athrun paled. If she only knew the times when he would actually just stare blankly into space, dreaming of ambushing her in a dark corner to steal kisses, or of the dreams he's had at night, wondering how it would be to hold her close and…

_Argh! No! _he scolded himself. This was one of the biggest challenges he's ever had in his life; having to control his hormones when it came to Cagalli. He had been trying so hard to stay away from temptation, that every time she would initiate a… ehrm!... a moment when they were alone, he'd try to change the subject or make a lousy excuse of having to go to the bathroom.

Earlier in the day, she had cornered him in the library where he was trying to get something to read, pushed him against a shelf containing cookbooks and handicrafts and started to kiss his neck in the most sensual way one could ever kiss another, which drove him almost to the brink of insanity. But even before he let his hormones get the best of him, he swiftly slipped away from her embrace and ran out of there as fast as those two feet could carry him after telling Cagalli that he'll be back after getting an apple from the kitchen.

He was dragged back into reality when he saw Cagalli prop her hands on her hips, causing her dress to drop down dangerously her chest. "You've been avoiding my advances since we've arrived in Orb, Athrun. So tell me. Aren't I attractive?"

Now of course, this naturally confused the Justice pilot to no bounds. Not too long ago did he and Cagalli actually fought over him being too aggressive, and in fact kneed him between the legs to prove how she totally disapproved of it. And now she was actually asking him _why_?

"Of course you're attractive!" he pointed out, taking a step forward. Cagalli took a step back and much to Athrun's dismay, her dress slipped another inch lower. He swallowed hard.

"There's a _but _there, I know it. I'm attractive but _what_, Athrun?"

Athrun wanted the floor to open up and swallow him whole. "But… well… " he sighed in resignation. "But you're _too _attractive in my eyes. I don't want us to fight again because of that time in Tento Land, or in the beach… so…"

This reply - contrary to what Athrun was expecting of an understanding nod and a smile - made Cagalli angrier. "So we can't kiss anymore? We can't sit around and cuddle anymore?" she hissed, a deadly glint in her eyes.

Athrun shook his head and backed away a step, trying to distance himself from her. "No! Look, Cagalli, you are very pretty…"

"My boyfriend won't even look at me," she said loudly, waving her arms in the air, once again causing her dress to slip further south. "Yeah, well come to think of it, almost every guy mistakes me to be a boy!"

Ahtun flushed even more. Well, yes, the first time he met Cagalli, he had thought she was a boy, but… "Cagalli," he said desperately. "Let's not fight over this. Please?"

She sniffed loudly, whirling around, turning her bare back at him, arms crossed over her chest. "Whatever. Just go away… Ugh…"

Shaking his head in disbelief, the Justice pilot slowly went to her, his hands loosely holding on to her bare shoulders. Wordlessly, he fingered the straps of the dress hanging freely around her arms. He could feel Cagalli tensing at his touch as he took his time in little by little inched the dress off her upper body, revealing her to be wearing a strapless white bra. "Now look here, little missy."

Cagalli sniffed once more, stubbornly refusing to face him.

Athrun grabbed her shoulder and forcibly turned her towards him. He let his eyes wander from her face, down to her neck, then to her body, drinking in the soft curves he had seen once before when they were trapped on that island not too long ago. Letting his hands work their way around her waist, he let the dress fall down completely to her feet. She still did not want to meet his eyes. This made him laugh. He had never actually had a conversation with Cagalli regarding her vanity, or anything that concerned her aesthetically, maybe because he never really thought she gave it any thought. Her roughish behavior sometimes made him forget that she was, in fact a blossoming lady.

"You are beautiful," he said silently, holding her at arm's length and intently, shamelessly eyeing her body from head to toe. "So beautiful I could look at you for hours and die happy after doing so."

Cagalli pouted, which immediately turned into a small grin.

Athrun opened leaned in to kiss her – as he _soooooo _wanted to for the past couple of days - but was immediately interrupted when the door suddenly slammed open and a worried-looking Dearka and a very flustered Miriallia came in.

Athrun screamed in horror as he hugged Cagalli to him, trying to cover his girlfriend's half-naked body from foreign eyes.

Dearka's eyes were darting from here and there in apprehension. "Is Cagalli all right? We heard a scream all the way from the driveway and we rushed in as quickly as possible but we got lost and…. " his voice died in his throat at the sight of Athrun and Cagalli standing in the middle of the room, the princess' face buried in the Justice pilot's chest.

Milly's hand flew to her mouth and immediately looked away. "Oh, dear!"

Dearka straightened, nervously letting out a laugh as he took a step back out the door. "Ehrm… Well…uhm… " He waved a bit, then hoisted Miriallia to her feet and hurriedly slammed the door behind him.

Athrun felt like he was going to pass out.

Cagalli looked like she had died on the spot. She did not move from where she was standing and her face was still buried in his chest.

"You know what?" she asked, her voice muffled in his shirt.

"What?" Athrun asked.

"I have a feeling they did that on purpose…"

Athrun did not know what the heck she was talking about.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Dearka grimaced as Athrun led him down the spiral stone steps that led to the basement of Cagalli's mansion, Miriallia walking beside him, clutching his side. So far, the Justice pilot still hadn't revealed the reason why he had called so early in the morning only to drag them off to the dank basement late in the evening.

Miriallia looked at him questioningly as the finally reached the bottom of the step and he could only shrug. The euphoria of finally getting back at Cagalli for having walked in on them twice and making them suffer for it was quickly replaced by dread when they heard loud screaming coming from the small door waiting for them in the basement.

It was a girl's voice.

"What the heck is that?" Dearka asked as Athrun pushed the door open and led the way inside.

The Justice pilot, still in a bad mood from their sudden intrusion on them, looked over his shoulder and gestured with his hand. "Cagalli's favor."

And with that, the Buster pilot's insides tied themselves into tight knots. It sounded like Athrun and Cagalli had captured some sort of banshee in there.

Miriallia turned to Athrun and bit her lip. "That's a girl screaming in there… isn't it?"

Athrun nodded, somehow his mood changing a bit for the better. The guy had honestly been very lenient when it came to Miriallia. "When Kisaka found the movement spreading biases in the country and were deported, this one was left behind. And since we cannot afford to launch another ship for just one passenger, we decided to detain her here."

As the three of them entered the room, the voices of the girl grew louder and louder until Dearka could already make out what she was saying.

"_You let me out this instant you Coordinator-loving witch! If I get my hands on you. I swear I'll…_" she went on and on about creative ways of making a person really miserable.

Dearka whistled. "Feisty, isn't she?"

Athrun smirked. "She tried to bite Cagalli twice on the arm. I got kicked on the shins three times. She wouldn't quit so we were forced to tie her up."

Dearka felt Miriallia shiver involuntarily, and he tried to soothe her gently. "Miriallia, why don't you go up and see if you can help Cagalli on anything else. I'll see you later."

Miriallia looked a bit doubtful, her blue eyes worriedly scanning his face, but she nodded. "Don't get bitten…"

This made Dearka laugh. "I'll see you later." With that he kissed her on the forehead and hurried her up the steps quickly. Had he known that Athrun was going to ask him to face a rabid girl, he would have saved Miriallia the trouble of going down with them.

"Why didn't you just detain her in a cell or something?" he asked over the loud screams as Athrun slammed the door behind them.

"She's only fifteen. Cagalli didn't want to take in anyone who would possibly start a ruckus after her detention in a cell, so for the meantime we're keeping her here until a shuttle bound for Japan, where we sent the rest of her fellow Blue Cosmos followers, arrives to save transportation. She may be here for a few days, three at the most, as we're expecting cargo to arrive anytime soon." The Justice pilot shrugged and jerked a thumb over his shoulder, indicating to the thrashing little runt bound to a chair, her legs flying in every direction as it's the only thing she could move.

Dearka irked at the sight of the girl. Her short, blond hair was in wild disarray as she screamed at the top of her lungs to be freed, and those sharp green eyes had a vengeance that promised if ever she did get free, she'd be creating havoc within a three-mile radius. He supposed she could be pretty, but then again, it was hard to tell, as her face was contorted in a way that blotted out whatever personality she may possibly possess.

The Buster pilot stared at the blue-haired friend of his. "What does this have to do with me?"

Athrun stared at him with… what the heck? Is that pity? "You will be assigned to watch over her. She is not a prisoner. We are merely waiting for her ride out of here. We need you to baby-sit her until that ride arrives."

And the world came crashing down on him. _"**WHAT?**"_

"It's a hard job and we can't think of anyone else strong enough to tame her. She's too wild. Even Kisaka gave up on her after fifteen minutes. Cagalli doesn't want her detained like a dog all the time." His friend eyes him soberly. "Will you do it? Please?"

Dearka swallowed hard, then slowly glared at the girl, who was still thrashing about. The little runt. "She'll get tired eventually, so I suppose I can watch over her then."

Athrun shook his head. "She's been kicking and screaming for five hours straight, resting only when no one can hear her." He had an amused look on his face. "What a handful."

Dearka narrowed his eyes at him. "Why don't you do it?"

"I have other things to do before Cagalli's appearance. I would if I could, you know."

That was it. He was trapped, and there was no backing out of this. He liked Cagalli too much to say no to her. Raising his hands in resignation, he turned to the girl. "What's her name?"

Athrun followed his gaze, then grimaced. "Her name is Fallon Bryaritt. Good luck. She can really hurt you if you allow her."

Somehow, the Buster pilot did not need the warning. Inching forward to have a closer look of his little project, he politely nodded to her, then said "Hello," over her wails.

In an instant, she looked up, momentarily shutting up, her eyes frozen as it landed on his face, making Dearka shiver.

Fallon frowned at him, then her face contorted into an ugly frown. And in an instant, she sent her foot flying to his shin.

Dearka bit back a howl as a skull-cracking pain seared from his leg up to his brain, and he immediately jumped back as the girl named Fallon tried to have another go at kicking him.

It was then did he know that he was dead.

"Athrun?"

"Yeah?"

"Tell Miriallia I love her very much and that I am glad I met her."

"Why's that?"

"I have a feeling I will not survive that long with this little thing here…"

The Justice pilot's laughter was drowned by more screaming coming from his worst nightmare.

_Have mercy on me, God…_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

He couldn't exactly remember the events after that unexpected kiss earlier in the day, but he could very much tell that everything went fine, since he had pretty much spent time with Kari the whole day, ending it with Chinese take-out and sitting on the floor of his and Kira's dorm room right in front of the TV, watching nothing interesting in particular. Or at least to him, it wasn't interesting. Kari sat next to him, chopsticks in her mouth as her eyes gazing intently at the television screen, completely mesmerized by the Knowledge Channel's episode about a caterpillar metamorphosing into a butterfly, the cardboard container of beef dumplings and garlic rice completely forgotten in her other hand.

Yzak peered into his own cardboard container and frowned as he discovered he didn't have any more beef dumplings but still had a lot rice. He hated it when that happened. These Chinese take-outs… they never give you enough dumplings…

He almost jumped as an unexpected beef dumpling suddenly shoved itself in front of his face, radiating its steamy goodness right next to his nose. He blinked and discovered it was just Kari. He turned to her and did not know what to do after he saw her looking at him, lowering the beef dumpling between her chopsticks and smiling as she dropped it in his cardboard container.

"Don't you just hate it when that happens, when you run out of dumplings when you have still so much rice?" she asked, then turned her eyes back the TV, just in time to see the butterfly finally wriggle out successfully from its cocoon.

Slightly annoyed for having been read by Kari even while eating, Yzak stared back down at his cardboard container, eyeing the lone dumpling sitting in a bed of garlic rice. He lowered his food on the carpet and picked up the glass of water on the table. Taking a swig of it, he tried to hide the blush that rose to his cheeks as once again, Kari looked at him.

"How funny," she said, setting her own food down next to her, then pulling her knees to her chest, her eyes not leaving the Duel pilot's face as he drained the water from the glass without even being that thirsty. "You enjoy food without anything to drink but water. Why is that?"

Yzak narrowed his eyes at her. "What's so funny about that?"

She shook her head, her expression sober and serious as it had been when she asked him to buy her some feminine pads. "Nothing. It's just that I seldom meet people who enjoy eating Chinese take-out and not drink green tea or iced tea or something like that."

This made him frown, narrowing his eyes at her. "What's the problem with just plain water?"

She laughed slightly, not answering his question and turning back to the television, once again resuming her viewing of the butterfly. Yzak followed her gaze. Man, butterflies sure were eerie to look at up close... Squinting slightly, he picked up his cardboard container and shook it, making the dumpling roll around on the rice.

Kari began slowly eating her food, her eyes never leaving the television, but Yzak could sense she was no longer as interested on the butterfly as she had been when it was still struggling out of its cocoon. She started to talk to him then. "I'm almost done with Chapter One and Two of my thesis. Maybe you could edit it for me?"

Yzak groaned inwardly. Another favor. Another favor he could not say no to. "Sure," he said, plucked the dumpling with his chopsticks, then popped it in his mouth, no longer feeling up to finishing the rice. "Whatever."

This reply was rewarded by a fleeting smile from her. She nodded to the television, where the narrator was describing how the butterfly helps in the reproduction of plants. "Are there any butterflies up in the PLANTs?"

The question surprised Yzak. He had never really paid much attention to his surroundings up in the PLANTs, except for the fact that they projected holographic simulations of the Earth's atmosphere. He guessed there were birds up there... But so far he had never spotted a butterfly before. Must maybe because he spent majority of his time indoors, reading or writing, or playing board games with his mother when he was young. Military school followed shortly after.

He shrugged and abandoned his cardboard container on the living room center table, then leaned his back on the couch. "How the heck should I know?"

She looked over to him with a frustrated face, then smiled her small smile. "I like butterflies. There's always a nice, comforting thought along with them every time they come out of their cocoon... like life after death... I wonder what it feels like... "

"What? To be a butterfly?"

"To die."

Yzak snapped his head up and stared at her in surprise, but could not find any words to express that strange feeling nagging at his gut. He did not like it, the way she was talking. And to heck with it, he was really worried. But since he was not skilled when it came to showing affection – the kiss having left him wondering where on Earth he got the urge to do it - he was kind of awkward to ask her if she was all right. "Wait a few more decades, and you might actually find out."

Her interest was perked up by his reply. "We'll all die sooner or later, so I guess you're right. I really want to know if it hurts... "

This time, Yzak was really creeped out. Running a hand through his hair, he looked back at the TV screen and watched as the butterfly fluttered here and there from one flower to another. "You have a way with depressing the people around you, huh?"

"I'm sorry. Am I depressing you?"

This made the Duel pilot sigh. Once again returning his gaze back to her, he fought himself from reaching out and brushing a stray lock of reddish-blonde hair from her forehead. "For almost a year, people had been fighting each other in order to survive. And here you are, wanting to die just when everything is going well. You are a weird girl."

That made her smile again, as if he just gave her a compliment. "Is that why you love me so much?"

Yzak blinked at the comeback, his face heating up a bit. Dashing away the feeling of having been once again embarrassed by this mysterious Natural girl, he snorted. "What makes you think I love you?"

She folded her hands on her lap after putting down her food, then let her eyes scan his face entirely. "Because I feel it."

Right now, Yzak felt like throwing up. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"You kissed me earlier. Didn't that mean anything?"

The reminder of having done the worst thing he had ever could do in his life, he hastily hid his face behind his hand. "What do you want to do about it?"

She giggled softly, and Yzak felt something warm brush against his arm. Removing his face from behind his hand, he looked down and saw Kari's head leaning against his shoulder, her face hidden behind a curtain of silky hair. "Nothing. Absolutely nothing."

The light-haired boy shifted a bit, not knowing what to do. Looking left, then right, somehow fretting that Kira might suddenly walk in with Kari cuddling up to him like this, he swallowed hard. He slowly moved the arm pinned under her weight, torn between the fear of having her lean on him so closely, and the fear of her pulling away. He was about to pull his arm free when Kari suddenly seized it with her tiny hands, and guided it around her shoulders, lacing her fingers through his, making his heart want to jump out of his chest.

"Hey," he protested, but ironically did not try to pull free from her grasp. He had touched her hands before, laced his fingers with hers once before, which had left him wondering how she happened to have the softest skin. Now that he had once again gotten the chance to hold her, the question popped into his mind. He could feel her collar bone pressing against his bare arm as she absentmindedly plucked at the tiny hairs on his forearm with her fingers of her free hand.

He opened his mouth to speak, trying to force out another protest for her to let go, but no words came out. Instead, he squeezed her hand softy, thumbing the back of her hand. "I do not give you permission to die anytime soon."

She didn't say anything, but he felt her head nod slightly.

He frowned. "And I hope you don't ask me to exchange diaries with you or anything stupid like that."

This made her chuckle. "Couples in Japan do that, you know. They exchange diaries, symbolizing trust. Why? Don't you trust me?"

Yzak blinked, then started to grumble. "I don't keep a diary."

"You know what?"

"Huh?"

"Neither do I."

The revelation made Yzak sigh in relief. "That's comforting to know."

She twisted around, eyed him with eyes that always succeeded in making him awfully lost in the sea of green. He had always hated and loved those eyes. "If I die, will you cry for me?"

Yzak scowled. "Why are you talking like this? I told you, I don't give you permission to die anytime soon."

She stared at him for a long time before returning her head on his shoulder. "Everyone dies sooner or later. We wouldn't know, right?"

This made Yzak want to growl. He decided to turn the question around. "What about you? Will you cry when I die?"

That silenced her for a brief second, then she sighed, but she never answered his question. Somehow, she never did like answering questions. Just asking them. "Yzak?"

"Now what?"

She pressed her lips to the back of his hand she was holding in hers, then squeezed tightly. "I hate you, too."

Strangely, Yzak actually found the humor in it. Leaning his temple on the top of her head, he closed his eyes and began to ask himself why Kari spoke like she was waiting to end her life.

_I will not allow it, _he said to himself, opening his eyes when he felt Kari resume the picking of the tiny hairs on his arm. "Hey," he said.

"Hmm?" she murmured absently.

"Shut up already, about that dying thing. I don't want to hear anything like that from you. It's to sick."

Once again, she nodded silently.

For someone who had been so accustomed to death, having blown a few people to kingdom come not a few months ago, Yzak didn't know the reason why on Earth he found her talks about death disturbing... He had killed a number of soldiers and civilians in the frontlines without blinking and had never been afraid to die himself, yet...

All of a sudden, he wanted to live longer...

But he sure as hell won't admit to anyone – heck! He's having a difficult time admitting it to himself – that it was because of a certain Karina Takano that had made life worth living right now.

_She annoys the hack out of me, she's a puzzle that you can't seem to solve, and she can pull at my heartstrings more than I usually like it, yet I like seeing her, I like being around her... Ugh! _

Yzak brushed back Kari's hair behind her ear, thumbing the conspicuous three sliver studs on her left lobe. He had always wondered why she never wore anything but those earrings. But somehow, those were a part of her that had always wanted to make him look at her so much. "Did you pierce your own ears?"

She shook her head. "Those holes were there for as long as I could remember." She paused a bit before continuing. "Come to think of it, sometimes, I feel like I have too many memories... Sometimes, there are things inside of my head that I don't remember doing, but they're there... "

"Like deja vu?"

She shook her head, causing the hair that he tucked behind her ear to slip free and hide her face again. "I can't explain it."

"What kind of thoughts?"

"Like, riding a bike... "

Yzak paled, remembering his own experience with a bicycle. "What about it?"

"I remember I fell off a bike when I was learning to ride one when I was five... But I know, when I was five, I was in the hospital the whole year for some weird reason... Something like that... " she laughed. "Am I going crazy?"

Yzak's head suddenly started to work. He did not believe that Kari was going crazy, but was suddenly starting to worry about these thoughts going on through her head. He had never really heard of that kind of case, not even up in the PLANTs... "Tell me more about these thoughts."

She pulled away from where she was leaning on, and met his gaze levelly. "You want to hear about my memories?"

Yzak grunted. "You sound so surprised. Aren't I allowed to be concerned for someone once in a while?"

She did not respond. She never did answer his questions directly. "It's not that. It's just that... Even my own mother wouldn't want to hear about it... Telling me that it's probably nothing... And you want to hear about it?"

"We haven nothing better to do. Spill."

She blinked a few times, letting her fingers slip from his hands, and Yzak fought the urge to snatch it back. Slowly inching away from him, she nodded. "Come with me."

Yzak was puzzled. "Where?"

"To the gym."

"What the... ? Why there? Can't you tell me here?"

She stared at him with those beautifully serious eyes, reaching out to take his hand into hers once again. "Even better. I'll _show _you my memories."

Yzak's eyes widened. _The MemS... _He shivered. He hated remembering those infernal machines. It was actually the first time he felt guilty over something that concerned Kira, or Lacus. "You're going to use it?"

She nodded. "And so will you."

"How?"

She tilted her head to the right, her fingers meeting his as she leaned forward. "You will help me patch up a network between two of the MemS. You will see my memories... "

Yzak felt his lungs give a bit, and he forced oxygen inside his lungs hastily. In normal circumstances, he really wouldn't have cared. But as he looked at her, those eyes, that face framed by strawberry-blond silk, those lips that were unbelievably the sweetest thing he had tasted, he could not help but comply.

Faking a grunt, he got up to his feet, helping her up. "Fine..." But deep down inside, his heart was racing.

_Oh, God... What will I see?_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_**Yuugiri: Hello and a happy new year to all!**_

_**I hope you all had a great holiday! **_

_**Again, I won't make this note too long. I just wanted to thank you all for the reviews on my last chapter.**_

**_Also, I have been really bothered by the reviews I am getting from new readers about some chapters they could not read… (grumbles) I really do not know what did with those, as I have been informed that chapters 9, 16 and before chapter 19 are missing… That was probably a mistake… There really is a chapter there, but I really do not know what happened the them. Anyway, please feel free to email me and I will gladly send you a copy of it. I have tried uploading the chapters but that didn't work either… (sigh…) so you don't have look at my profile, here is my e-mail _**

_**Again, happy new year!**_


	26. Phase 26: Sincerity

**_Lol! They didn't let me display my e-mail address here! Wonder why they do that? And they don't even allow smiley faces, too... and the asterisks... Oh, well... As my last chapter was short, coz my brain was a bit malfunctioning due to the holiday festivities when you can't help but eat and eat until you get really stupidly full, I made this to be a long chapter... By the way, I've uploaded the missing chapters and this time, I think it worked. Those who haven't read it yet may do so now. Sorry for the inconvenience. The last thing I want is to have agitated readers... (remembers having been a human target of KiraxLacus fans everywhere, and shudders in horror)_**

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed.**_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_**July 20, AW**_

For the last two days, Kira's parents had stayed in the Abashiri Kanko Hotel a few minutes away from his dorm, dropping by at school to eat lunch together with Lacus downtown. In the evening, they would once again fetch Kira from his dorm and have a family-only night out in the city, catching up on stuff that they've missed for so long now. It was just like old times. They would kid around and window-shop while eating ice cream along the street.

Kira couldn't be any happier.

Of course, he had told them nothing about what he found out in space, and was more than happy to forget about that issue. All he did in those couple of days was enjoy the simple things in life. He had a family, and he had a girlfriend. Everything was going to be fine. He knew it.

As he stepped out of the Memambetsu airport that Wednesday morning after seeing his parents off to Orb, he looked down at the floor and felt his pocket for the thick wad of Earth Dollars his father had given him earlier right before he boarded the plane after their "man-to-man talk", which included how to treat a girl right, and how to make her feel loved all the time. While his mother had sneaked off to the little gift shop sitting in the corner, his father took the chance to pull him to a quiet place and lay it on him. It was embarrassing, but he did learn a few tips from him, actually.

_"Women are easy to understand once you pinpoint their language and learn to speak it," his father said seriously. So seriously it almost made Kira laugh._

_Nodding politely, the Freedom pilot asked, "What language is that, dad?"_

_Haruma Yamato placed a firm hand on his shoulder, making sure he was listening closely. "Women speak either one of the five languages of love, Kira. The first language is _Words of Affirmation. _Most women feel loved when their partner isn't stingy when it comes to verbal affection. A simple, 'You look pretty today,' or 'I love you,' will make them feel loved very much."_

_Having blushed deeply at how his father was giving him a crash course in making sure Lacus was going to feel appreciated, Kira still could not help but listen for more of his advice, guiltily waiting for any tip to make things work out perfectly between him and the pink-haired songstress. "That makes sense, I guess. What are the other languages?"_

_"The next language of love is _Physical touch. _This is awfully self explanatory, don't you think?"_

_If it were possible to blush even more, Kira would have. He would love to hold Lacus near as much as possible. _

_"While some women like to talk when they're depressed, some get even more depressed when they get too overwhelmed by words, so most of them just stay quiet and cry. For women who speak this kind of language, she'd appreciate it more if you listen to what she's not saying, sitting her down or holding her in your arms to calm her down. You're mother is one of these women._

_"The next language is _Receiving Gifts._ Now women who speak this language don't mean they're materialistic. These women, in fact, are the easiest to please. A simple flower you plucked from your garden may mean everything to her, or maybe a card of some sort even if you're not supposed to give her a card until your anniversary. This will make them feel how much you care by going out of your everyday tasks to remember her and give her something, however small the gift is."_

_Kira scratched his head, pretending like he wasn't at all paying attention. "Okay... "_

_His father leaned forward, somehow even more serious than before. "The fourth language of love is _Acts of Service_. Your mom is a sucker for this, too. Like taking out the garbage every Friday, or making her breakfast in bed... Your mom is really - "_

_"His mom is really what, Haruma?" came a voice from behind them, making both him and his father jump up and whirl around in alarm. They found Mrs. Caridad Yamato staring at them with a handful of paper bags from the gift shop, a weird expression on her face, her mouth pursed in a way Kira remembered as reserved for his father when he came home late from work without calling first. _

The memory made Kira chuckle softly to himself as he started to walk towards the bus stop, his father worming out of his mother's gaze, and he never got the chance to learn what the fifth language of love was. He decided that he might not need it as much. He knew he'd have fun discovering for himself what language Lacus spoke.

But he couldn't help but feel all giddy at finally seeing her again. He wasn't able to spend too much time with her over the last two days as his parents were there, and so never got the chance to experience just hanging out and doing the usual things couples did. Except for lunch and their Health Education class, (where they got a perfect score, and a special award of having the baby with the most personality over a month) he hadn't seen much of her. So now, he was really looking forward to meeting up with her after her last class that'll end in two hours.

Lucky him. His schedule allowed him to see his parents off without having to miss a class. And really lucky him, he still had a couple of hours free to get Lacus a gift.

Feeling hopelessly excited of having to shop for the first time for a gift for Lacus, aside of course from the ring he gave her, he rode the bus and took the hour's ride back to downtown Abashiri and started to scout around for a potentially cute gift that she might like. Every time he'd stop at a window to look inside, he'd press the hand that held the ring Lacus gave him, and he'd end up feeling all warm and fuzzy inside. He did not know if it was legal for a person to be this happy at a single moment. Maybe it was because he was so used to having fate work against him, that he was so overwhelmed by this sense of peace. For once after so long a time, he felt very optimistic about everything.

_I suppose everyone has the right to be happy... Even me... _

Strolling leisurely down the alley that promised more gift shops, he made his way to that small store that he had seen once displaying some little stuffed animals by the window. He could remember seeing Lacus had a number of those stuffed toys sitting on her bed. Perhaps she would love to have a bit more additional items to her collection.

Stopping by at the nearest Internet Café, he decided to send Sai a Happy Birthday e-mail before anything else, as well as a good luck e-mail to Cagalli for her speech that afternoon, then proceeded with his gift hunt for Lacus. Having never been given the chance to actually shop for a girl, he was completely lost. But as if fortune was finally on his side, he spotted this enormous white bear that held a big, big heart with pink letters that read _Kuma Hugz! _in loopy handwriting.

Purchasing it and not bothering to have it wrapped, instead bought a yellow ribbon he himself tied around its neck, he rushed out of the store excitedly, and was indeed very pleased to discover he still had a lot of money left in his pocket. As he really did not expect to have this much cash at hand, for the allowance Burin Dellit sends them weekly had just arrived the other day, he was most certainly happy to know that he had more than enough to spend for an early dinner with the love of his life.

He could not stop grinning! People were actually starting to move away from him as he made his way back to their dorm to freshen up before fetching Lacus at school. Absently making his way up the stairs to their room, the big bear secured under his arm, he was caught by surprise when he reached his destination, and was automatically alarmed to see a gaping hole through the wooden door about as big as his head. It was as if a cannon ball had shot out of the living room from the inside.

His hand automatically flew to the door knob, but jumped back when Yzak's scowling face appeared at the other end of the hole, three long nails clamped tightly between his teeth.

"What the heck happened here?" Kira demanded, adjusting his hold on his present as the Duel pilot pushed the door open to let him in. "What is that hole doing on our door?"

Yzak, he saw, was armed with a hammer and a small, irregularly-shaped piece of wood that he immediately slammed against the referred hole. He wordlessly got one of the nails sticking out of his mouth and began hammering away noisily.

Kira frowned as he sat the bear down on the couch away from Yzak and his deranged hammering, then went to the light-haired boy's side. He gasped when he noticed the hand that held the piece of wood into place was all red, and the knuckles were a bit raw. "You didn't punch that hole, did you?"

"I did," Yzak grunted at him, hardly being able to speak well as he still had two nails in his mouth. "What's it to you?"

"Yzak, why on earth did you punch a hole through our door?"

Of course, he should have known better than to expect a good enough explanation from him. But what worried Kira was the fact that his roommate had been in such a relatively good mood last Monday. He even greeted him when he came in late that night, as he helped his parents look for a place to stay. But then again, yesterday, he was already being a bit moody. He was really dying to know why. Although he had pretty much a clue.

Lacus had said to him that Kari confessed of her and Yzak's relationship. Kira almost fell out of his chair at the revelation that Yzak actually has a girlfriend now. But wisely enough, he decided not to let the Duel pilot know that his relationship was not at all a secret to him. But then, why is he all grumpy?

Yzak hammered the last two nails on the door and wiped a bit of sweat that had popped out of his forehead. Kira discovered his roommate still hadn't changed out of his uniform, and that he looked like he had been running around all day without stopping. "None of your damn business."

Deciding that he will not let anything ruin his day, not even a huge gaping hole in their door, he shrugged, grabbed his towel and proceeded to the bathroom after taking the bear back into his room just in case Yzak was having another one of his _'episodes'_ and he did not want his present to be anywhere near him if he was.

He heard Yzak cursing wordlessly behind him as he took refuge inside the bathroom, once again feeling elated at the fact that he'd be seeing Lacus soon.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Yzak watched Kira scuttle away excitedly into his room, carrying that ridiculously huge stuffed animal with him. What the heck is a _Kuma hugz _anyway? He hated it. Yamato looked so damn jolly today that he didn't believe it was at all possible for one to contain that much happiness at one time. His blood started to boiled a bit when he heard Kira humming to himself as he hurried to the bathroom.

But then again it was better than having him sulk around and feel sorry for himself.

Groaning in agony, he stared at his left hand and clenched it into a fist. Damn, that door was hard, but remarkably, he found the pain satisfying. Examining his handiwork of patching up the hole he had made earlier, he tried to contain the annoyance that was bubbling up his gut. Why were girls so hard to understand?

It started right after he had disengaged himself from the MemS after finally viewing what she had so eagerly wanted to show him. Her memories. It was the eeriest thing he had ever encountered in his life, having being connected to some sort of device that would transport your subconscious back into that day your mind reacted to the most. Never in his life would he want that to happen again... It was like going back to that point in time when you simply just wanted to stop existing...

Of course, Kari did not let him try the machines without fair warning... Right after he had patched the network between the four MemS, as he had discovered he could not patch one with the other without putting them all together, she had immediately explained to him what he should be expecting once tapped into the machine.

But no warning could have prepared him for what he saw there.

_It was dark when they got to the gym, as Yzak had last remembered it when Kira snapped. He hated that place. It was too... dreary... Aside from the few happy shouting and laughing of people from the soccer field drifting to them, and the occasional fireworks exploding through the huge glass windows of the gym, one would think they were in some sort of parallel dimension, making the Duel pilot more nervous than he had ever felt before. Holding nothing but a flashlight and some tools, Yzak was able to finish the network in fifteen minutes._

"_I want you to know that this explanation, though, is purely based on theory," Kari said as she ran a hand over one of the machines, a detached look over her smooth, almost luminous face._

_"Theory?" Yzak asked skeptically, wiping his sweaty palms on his pants as he frowned at her. "You mean this is the first time you'd be trying this?"_

_"Yes."_

_"And what are the assurances that it will work? That I'd be able to see what you've been through?"_

_"I have no assurances, but then again we have nothing to lose."_

_"What is the theory, then?"_

_She looked pleased that he was actually willing to hear her out for a change. "In order to get to me and my memories, you will have to struggle with some patches of yours."_

_This made Yzak pause. "Mine? You mean _my _memories?"_

_She nodded silently, her hair once again swaying as she moved her precious head. "Are you up to it?"_

_It took him a while to actually respond. "Yeah. Whatever. Let's just get things over with. I want to get out of here as fast as I could..."_

Yzak shivered at the memory of having once again agreed with her without his usual complaints. He wondered what it was with her that made him utterly, utterly helpless... He simply could not say no to her... _Why?_

But come to think of it, it really meant little to him, the true reason behind that weird phenomenon. His agreement made her smile, and deep down, even as much as he tried to deny it, it made him feel quite satisfied with himself every time he was able to make her delicate lips curl up into a fleeting smile, however small it was.

Grumbling to himself as he made his way to the kitchen, settling down on the dining table and staring down at his throbbing left hand, he could not help but remember the things he had seen in the MemS, the memories he had to fight through in order to reach hers... His memories...

And someone else's…

_Oh, God..._

_The last thing he could remember was sitting on the weirdly designed contraption and Kari strapping him in, placing over his head a funny-looking helmet that pressed tightly across his temples and guard covering his eves. _

_The next thing he knew, he was in an unfamiliar cockpit of, he was sure of it, a Mobile Suit. Clad in also unfamiliar gear, he looked up, then down, trying hard to digest the surroundings. It was so bizarre, the feeling of being in it. It was like his consciousness was merely a passenger in his body... Very strange indeed... Why was he so nervous? Why was his heart racing terribly fast? He was feeling strange emotions that he was sure he had never felt before... Anxiety, Confusion, Fear... but mostly confusion... _

_Just then, a blinking light appeared on the lower screen, indicating an incoming message from someone, and he watched as his hands automatically glided down the keyboard control panel of the Mobile Suit. All he could do was watch... But the next thing that happened almost threw his consciousness out of his body._

_That was because it was not his body at all._

_He blinked warily and saw his reflection on the presently dark screen._

_And gasped._

_Kira's lavender eyes stared back at him._

_He was inside Kira's body!_

_But even before he could utter a word of protest to himself, everything just went all blurry and the next thing he knew, he was no longer in the Freedom pilot's body, but appeared to be floating, simply watching from some angle of the ceiling, And below him, he could see Kira standing awkwardly as a little girl handed him a small object..._

_"Thank you for protecting us until now," said the girl somewhat shyly. Yzak blinked a bit and saw that it was a small paper flower that she had handed over to the brown-haired boy. _

_Quite frankly, Yzak was not liking this at all. It felt too weird having to see Kira's life passing by his eyes... Why the heck was he seeing Kira's memories and not his?_

_And what was strange was that he could actually feel Kira's emotions running through his own mind, making him very, very confused._

What the heck is happening?

_Just then, it started to happen again. He felt his surroundings melt into one sloppy mess of colors and blurs, and he found himself not floating, but once again inside a body..._

A body?

_No... not _a _body. _Two _bodies. _

_Yzak felt like he wanted to throw up... His head was spinning as he felt like he was seeing through two pairs of eyes at once, feeling two tragically heightened emotions at once... _

_It was extremely hot! Hotter than any place he had been. Both bodies he was in felt like being burnt to the crisp and everything around him was a flaming inferno._

_After a few minutes of finally digesting the surroundings of both entities, he felt panic surge through his minds... _

_"NO!!! THEY'RE JUST CIVILIANS!!!" he screamed through Kira's body as he frantically maneuvered his Strike to move despite the strong pull of gravity rendering it helpless. But no! He must not give up! He had to protect many people!!! He simply could not die! Not yet! A great degree of determination flashed though his mind from Kira's thoughts._

_In his own body, as he finally started to remember when this had actually happened, when they were forced to crash on Earth in the pursuit of the Archangel, he could not even hear himself scream out cusses and threats. The next thing that happened made his subconscious scream out in terror..._

**NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!**

_He wanted so much to stop himself from seeing what he was about to do. He pointed his weapon at the visual of the small carrier shuttle, mad fury flaming though his mind's eye, blinding him... killing all rational thought. _

_And he pulled the trigger..._

_And he felt Kira's heart stop beating at the sight of what had just happened. He saw flashes of the girl giving him a paper flower... _

_And he saw Kira cry... _

_The shuttle containing a number of people along with that little girl exploded in a whirl of metal and debris and smoke... _

_Yzak wanted to die..._

_And then, in a split second, he heard Kari's voice. _

"Is this what you do to civilians in real life...?"

_And the heat, the whirl of emotions, the anger, the hatred, the guilt, the confusion... All faded into darkness, until all he could see was a pinprick of light in the distance..._

_And then he woke up with a jolt, sweat literally pouring out of him. In a rushed panic, he knocked away the gear over his head, letting it fall to the floor with a thud, frantically tore at the straps binding his arms and torso, and jumped out of the machine in a bloody hurry. He saw Kari, who was strapped in the device right next to him, serenely take off her gear and blink at him questioningly, asking him why he had stopped when they were almost there..._

_"Kari," he rasped nervously, out of breath, pointing at the machines as if it had just said it will rule the world. "This device of yours, does it have a memory chip... a recording device of some sort?"_

_This time, it was her turn to look nervous. "Yes... I put it there for further observation after the Summer," she said uncertainly. "Why? What... what did you see?"_

_Yzak swallowed hard, trying to regain composure. "I... I saw Kira's memories in there... mixed with mine... You told me I'd be struggling with my memories!" he roared angrily. "I was friggin' struggling with **two**!!!"_

_But instead of apologizing to him, Kari, in fact, looked thrilled. "Two? You saw Kira's memories?" she raised her hand to her chin thoughtfully. "It must be because Kira had used the MemS before... and when you patched up a network, the memory chips were in a way mashed together as well... " She eagerly turned to him. "But why did the MemS lead you through that certain memory in order to get to my memories?"_

Of course, Yzak had not bothered to tell her of his theory about it. He figured out about that the common denominator with his memories with Kari was her comment about civilians in the game she had developed and his true experiences that related well with it...

The next thing that he had wanted to do then was get a bat and smash those demonic devices into itsy-bitsy pieces. But it was expected that Kari will not have it.

Burying his face in his arms, he groaned loudly. The reason why he was in such a bad mood for two days straight was that Kari wanted him to do it again for her this Saturday... He could not even find a place to release his anger upon himself... Yes, he was mad at himself, not at Kari. She, after all, never tried to force him into doing it. He himself had agreed. So he wanted to kick himself so bad then and there that when he got home right after dropping Kari off to the bus stop for her weekly visit to Kian, her maniac brother, he was so pissed that he wanted to punch something. Too bad the door of their dorm was in his way... And so, the hole. Haha...

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

It was one thing to deal with your own memories, but to deal with someone else's, that was a totally different story.

Dammit... He hated his life... No wonder Kira went nuts... It was a machine that seemed to bring out the negative memories out of you...

The thought made Yzak's head snap up from his arms then he frowned.

_Why is it that it brought out all the bad memories of a person...?_

He shook his head, then sighed. It was not the time for him to think about this. Suddenly being reminded of something he had to tell Kira, he got up and knocked on the bathroom door. "Hey, you."

"What is it?" came Kira's muffled voice amid the splashing of water from the shower. Yzak shuddered at the memory of Kazui and Sai slipping a recorder while he was singing in the shower.

"Athrun called."

He heard Kira turn off the shower, and spoke in a loud voice from the inside. "Oh! What did he want? Are they all right?"

"He told me to tell you that Kisaka had coordinated with Burin Dellit along with a number of neutral nations representatives to air the live broadcast of Cagalli's speech."

"Did they approve of it?"

"Athrun said they did."

Suddenly, the door opened slightly and out came Kira's head from the small crack of the door. His hair was matted on his forehead, his wide eyes blinking back the water pouring down his head. "Was that Cagalli's idea?"

"No. It was Athrun's."

Kira smiled, then closed the door in his face. "Wonderful! We can watch Cagalli's speech after all."

Yzak scowled as he heard Kira resume his humming in the shower. Why the heck was he so damn happy?

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

"Cagalli... please open the door..." she heard Miriallia plead from the other side of her wardrobe as she tried so desperately to roll into a ball as small as she could force herself to be, cozily surrounded by discarded dresses and girly stuff.

She shook her head stubbornly and started to whimper in agony. Her Public Appearance was in three hours, and all she had come up was 'Good evening, people of Orb'... How she wanted to die in that small cramped space of hers then and there...

"Cagalli, please? Open the door and maybe I can help you," Milly said again, and she heard a small thud on the door, and she knew that Milly had slumped on it in despair. "Sulking in there will not accomplish anything. Come out and I'll help you make a speech..."

She groaned inwardly. This was not simply just **_a _**speech. It was **_the _**speech. "No. I'd rather stay here and rot... I knew it. I knew I was going to bomb... See? I'm bombing it already and I haven't even started. I let my people down... "

"No you haven't. You have three hours to get things done. If you don't show up, that's when you let your people down. So please, please, please come out now before Kisaka and Athrun find out you're in there."

She knew she was being silly hiding inside her wardrobe right now, but it was starting to get too much for her. It had been but a scant two days ago, and she had decided to take it lightly, her written speech... It was all her fault. What could have been the only opportunity for her to move her people's hearts was slowly sliding down the drain, because she, Cagalli Yula Attha, was irresponsible... Her father would have had a fit if he were there.

Of course, Kisaka would be a good proxy for her father's disappointment, then there was Murrue, who had been going out of her way by helping her for no apparent reason except that she was a really swell girl. And then of course, there was Athrun, who had been staying up all night long to make sure her paperwork was done, or that she had enough tea beside her when she was working late...

He had been awfully busy with errands in the morning and preoccupied with that captive girl in the evening when Dearka would go home to the Haww residence. She had seen the Buster pilot's face after having spent seven agonizingly straight hours with the Blue Cosmos supporter. It looked like that Fallon girl was capable of sucking the life source out of a living Coordinator. Athrun seemed to be handling the job better but since he was busy in the morning, Dearka was the only one they could run to for help regarding her case.

Cagalli was expecting a trip to Japan for her tomorrow, and hopefully it would be at the earliest possible time. She had so many things to take care of and the girl was definitely a bother to her and the rest.

Yet she knew that all of that was nothing compared to the horror she was going to face in three hours.

Her head shot up when she heard shuffling outside her wardrobe door, and a bit of whispering. Then, the next thing she knew, the door was sliding open, admitting a very satisfied-looking Athrun with a key dangling in his right hand. He slid the door closed again and Cagalli started to panic when she heard Miriallia walk away after saying a loud 'good luck' to the Justice pilot.

"Whatcha doing?" he asked casually as he slipped the key – where on earth did he get that? – into his pant pocket, and smiled down at her curled-up form on the floor.

Cagalli turned away from him. "Go away. I need time to think things through."

His eyebrows raised slightly, amused at her explanation. "In a closet?"

Cagalli's mouth worked wordlessly as she tried to find a suitable smart comeback but found no inspiration. "Leave me alone, okay?"

She heard Athrun sigh as he slowly kneeled in front of her and took her hands in his. "Okay. Tell me what is going on with you."

She tried to pull away, but Athrun had a mean grip.

Sighing in resignation, she looked up at him and almost felt like crying. "I have no speech," she whined. Pulling her left hand free and digging into her pocket for a scrap of rumpled paper, she started to feel sick as she handed it to the Justice pilot grudgingly. "This is all I have."

Athrun gingery took it, read it out loud. "Good evening, people of Orb… " then he stopped reading. That was because there wasn't anything following up that greeting.

Cagalli stared at him, expecting a sermon about how she had procrastinated over the last two days that, she was being irresponsible and could not even finish a simple speech for a very important event. But none came. Which pissed her off. "Are you mocking me?" she snapped.

Athrun blinked at her, surprised. "Mocking you with what?"

"With your silence! Aren't you going to scold me?"

He chuckled softly. "When have I ever scolded you over anything that you did?"

Cagalli fell silent. She knew the answer to that. _Never. _But no! She was not going to let him squirm out of this without a fight.

_A fight I myself picked. Great, Cagalli. Very mature._

She rounded on him quickly, making him sit on his behind with a thud. "Don't you patronize me, Athrun Zala! You've been silent about everything that I've done ever since we came here. You didn't even so much as said a single word about how I run things here, even thought I know I have been doing a lousy job of it!"

And all Athrun did was stare at her.

She got even more pissed. "Say something."

"Okay."

"Okay what?"

"Just okay. You told me to say something and so I did."

"Athrun!"

"What?"

The princess of Orb glared at him, and he serenely stared back. Cagalli wanted to pull her hair out. Shaking her head in frustration, she pulled her knees up to her chin and buried her face in her arms. "I'm a lousy leader…" she moaned.

And then she heard Athrun laughing out loud, followed by scuttling. She then felt his arms go around her in a tight hug. "Cagalli, you are not a lousy leader. No one said you are. The reason why I never said anything about how you were running things here is because I know you'll eventually get the hang of it sooner or later."

It was eating her alive, his patience… his understanding. "It's annoying me, the fact that I could have avoided this predicament if I had paid close attention to my father when he was still alive. Now all that is left is a vague memory of how he had run the place…" she murmured as she rested her head on his shoulder, somehow feeling slightly better.

"See, Cagalli? That's the only thing that you've been doing wrong so far."

"What?" she asked, tugging softly at Athrun's hair.

"You've been trying too hard to fill in your father's shoes… trying so hard to be what _he _was without giving _your _style a chance."

"How else can I do the things my father has done without doing it his way?"

Athrun pulled away from her, holding her back at arm's length. "By doing it _your _way."

She froze at what he said, stared at him for the longest possible time. She had never really considered the fact that there was a Cagalli-way to do it. She knew she was rash, hot-headed and very ill-mannered most of the time. That was why she had always thought she could never make it work out. "_My _way?"

He nodded encouragingly. "You don't know how convincing you can be, Cagalli." After that, he proceeded shyly, his left hand flying to his chest, unbuttoning his polo shirt and pulling out a black, stringed amulet. Cagalli eyed it, recognizing it in a second. She had given this to him not too long ago. "Back then, when Kira and I fought and I blew off the Aegis, you found me. And you rescued me," he started, squeezing her shoulder lightly as he flipped the amulet on his palm. "You gave me this, even after thinking I killed him, unknowingly leaving something in my head that what we were doing was wrong… Telling me of the reality of the cycle of what we were spiraling in."

Cagalli felt her face heat up as he intently stared into her eyes. "I didn't do anything special then."

He laughed at her comment. "To you, maybe not, but to me you said something that had changed everything. Don't you see? You wrote no speech for a ZAFT soldier then, but something in your words changed my views, even if I tried so desperately to deny it. You have a way with words, Lady Princess of Orb. You may not know it, but the sincerity in the things that you have to say seems to make a difference." He gestured to the discarded piece of paper on the ground and grinned. "You can do this. Everyone is counting on you to make things right, because they know you are capable of doing this. So can we please step out of this closet and get something to eat? Then I'll help you compose your thoughts before your big speech, okay?"

And with that, Cagalli felt a smile tug at the corner of her lips. She did not know what she would do without Athrun there. Nodding and finally getting up to her feet, Athrun following suit, she tucked the amulet back inside his shirt and buttoned it well. "All right, Athrun. Thank you for the pep talk. I'm firing you again."

He looked confused. "Firing me again? I thought I was your therapist."

"You're fired. You are now my personal coach."

He scratched his head. "Well… all right… "

Cagalli smiled sheepishly as she picked up two discarded dresses on the floor of her wardrobe behind her. "Your first job is to advice me which suits me better. The green dress or the blue one."

Athrun almost fainted.

She smiled sweetly, trying to look cute. "Well?"

"The blue one."

She stared at the one he was referring to and pursed her lips in thought. "Good choice. The green one makes me look too thin."

She raised her eyes when she heard Athrun clear his throat, a habit he'd gotten used to every time he'd like to introduce a new topic. "What is it?"

Athrun shifted his gaze from left to right, nervously and obviously wondering whether or not he should tell her. "Uhm… err…"

Cagalli wrapped an arm around Athrun's neck and planted a kiss on his cheek. "Come on, Athrun, tell me what you have in mind right now."

He cleared his throat again. "Ahh, well. You see about your speech…? Well, uhm, I haven't told you yet, coz I know that you wouldn't give it a chance… so… I didn't tell you sooner but I guess right now you have to know… "

Cagalli's smile froze on her face, already knowing that whatever it was that he was going to say, it was not going to be good. "_What?_" she asked between clenched teeth.

"Uhm…" Athrun slowly eased away from her and slid the closet door open an inch. "Kisaka and I kind of… "

"Kind of what?"

"Kind of coordinated with a few neutral nations…"

"About what?"

"Erm. To air your speech on TV, live on their country okI'llseeyoulaterluvyoubuh-bye!" And with a final breath, he slammed the door wide open before Cagalli could react, and zoomed out of there so fast the princess of Orb could only stare.

After a few seconds, what Athrun just said drew in on her like a sponge soaking water. She was going to be broadcasted **_LIVE _**in almost **_every neutral country _**around the **_globe_**!

She felt her insides melt at this thought. And in one wave of fury, she screamed. "**_ATHRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!!!!_**"

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Miriallia glanced over her shoulder and sighed as she saw Athrun give her a reassuring nod. Nodding back, she murmured a feint 'good luck', then went on ahead to look for Dearka, who she knew was out in the garden, handcuffed to that girl named Fallon. Honestly! They were treating her like a dog that needed walks!

For the last few days, Dearka would come home at five in the afternoon looking like a drowned cat. His arms were scratched and yesterday, he had a number of bruises on his left shin. That girl was very violent indeed, but Miriallia could not help but feel sorry for her. She was wasting all her energy because of her hatred.

Humming a small tune as she made her way downstairs, she stopped in her tracks when she heard screaming.

Loud, boisterous screaming coming from the back lawn.

_Oh, God…_

Hurrying to see what had just happened, if anyone was hurt at all, she stumbled out of the kitchen and proceeded to the backdoor, her heart in her throat. She had to get through a wall of very curious spectators as the screaming had brought about almost all of Cagalli's maids and butlers out of the mansion.

And Miriallia thought she would die at what she saw.

There, on the ground, was the blonde girl, as usual screaming her lungs out. The only thing new to this setting was that she was lying face down on the ankle-high grass, and Dearka kneeling beside her, his forearm pressed firmly on her shoulder blades, keeping her firmly in place. He legs were kicking wildly, but Dearka had a good angle and was not hit by her wild thrashing. What made Miriallia worry was when she saw that the Buster pilot's left ear was bleeding.

"What on Earth happened here?" she demanded as the maids all cleared a way for her to pass.

At the sound of her voice, Dearka raised his eyes at her, a mad glint in those lavender eyes. "She was misbehaving. I had to control her."

Miriallia looked around as the maids started to whisper to among themselves. Shooing them away, and making sure everyone was out of ear's shot, she hurried out to help her boyfriend. "What did she do?"

Deark motioned with his handcuffed hand to his bleeding ear. "The little brat bit me!"

Miriallia gasped. "She did _what? _Why?"

"Apparently, because I am evil and should die," he said dryly.

"You Coordinators should all go to hell!!!" shrieked the girl, once again giving it all she's got at thrashing with the hopes of getting away.

"Dammit…" she heard Dearka mutter under his breath as he wiped at the blood trickling down his cheek. "You've had your anti-rabies shots, right?"

The girl screamed even louder.

With this, Miriallia could not help but shake his head and shrug her shoulders as she kneeled by them and held out her hand. "Let me watch over her for the while, okay?"

Dearka stared at her as if she were mad. "What?"

"Let me watch over her for the while. Get your ear checked and let me see if I can do better than you."

The Buster pilot looked down at the girl doubtfully, then at her. "She can be really feisty, Miriallia. She might hurt you."

She smiled then looked around her and brightened when she saw a bench sitting innocently under a tree. She pointed at it. "She doesn't necessarily have to be handcuffed to me. You can attach her over there. I will watch over her for the time being."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

And after a few minutes and a lot of loud cusses, they had finally managed to get Fallon cuffed to the bench's armrest. After a final look from Dearka and a wave from Milly, the Buster pilot finally left and disappeared inside the house.

Milly sat on the bench next to the girl and turned to her, who was presently glaring daggers through her head. "Hello."

"Fuck you!"

Milly giggled. "You certainly have a mouth there."

"So?"

"So, it is very unbecoming of a woman to say bad words." This comment made the girl's face blush slightly, her mouth closing a bit, and for a split-second, Miriallia could actually see her beauty. With very big, very round green eyes and short, wispy dirty-blond locks framing her face, she looked very much like a doll.

"Much better," Miriallia said, looking up into the leaves and branches of the tree shading them and feeling quite at peace with herself even with knowing that she was beside an ear-biting fifteen-year old girl. "So where are you from?"

It took a while before she could speak, but her answer made Miriallia gasp. "Heliopolis."

Turning to the girl, her eyes wide, she felt her hand fly to her mouth. "I was from Heliopolis, too."

At this revelation, Fallon's eyes widened in disbelief. "You… were from Heliopolis? But… I never saw you in the evacuation shelters…?"

Milly nodded her head gravely. "That's because I never made it to the shelters."

"But how could you have survived?"

This question made Miriallia blink. She knew the reason to that. It was because she, along with Kira, Kazui, Sai and Tolle – _Tolle _– had been caught in a whirlwind of shooting and killing, ending up not in the escape shuttles, but in an Earth Alliance war ship.

And maybe it shouldn't have made a difference, but she somehow found herself telling of the girl of their adventures from the moment they left Heliopolis until the cease-fire was declared. But not without hearing a lot of derogatory comments along the way.

First, of course, was that supposed ZAFT attack on the neutral colony.

It was then did Miriallia actually realize that neither the EA nor ZAFT had bothered to explain to the many people on Earth, be they Coordinator or Natural, about the things that that had happened up in space, about the Rebel Faction and the renegade ship Archangel and its crew. By the way things were going, Milly was in fact starting to have strong suspicions that both sides didn't have any plan at all of letting the people know of the events that took place in that battle that ended all battles. It could be pride, for all she knew, that both side's definition of justice happened to be both bent, and that it took an odd assortment of people to finally finish the war.

How sad. Even until the end, it seemed like no one could simply erase the hated that had accumulated over time.

What was so sad was that this young generation was also acquiring this hate.

"They attacked us! If it weren't for them, we would still have a home!" Fallon yelled loudly, angrily pounding her fist on the bench armrest, making her cuffs rattle in the process. "We would still be living our lives the way we should be living!"

Milly smiled serenely, leaning forward and propping her chin on the palm of her right hand. "You are a Natural, right?"

Fallon nodded uncertainly after a brief pause. "Yes. Why?"

"What would you do if I tell you that the reason why Heliopolis was attacked was because the Earth Alliance has been keeping Mobile Suits in that colony?"

As expected, the girl was in denial. She started to sputter out some explanation about some sort of misunderstanding that made everything the way it was.

"So tell me, what do you want to do about this situation that we're in right now?"

Fallon was determined with her answer. "All of them should just disappear!"

"Why?"

The girl frowned. "What do you mean why?"

"Just that. Why? I don't even know why you are so mad at them. Look at Dearka. You can't blame him for existing the way he is, right? He was born that way. His mother and father are Coordinators. He didn't ask for it. And he sure didn't mean to be born in this world at this era. You can't hold it against him for being stronger than us, or smarter than us, because technically that's the only thing that differs from Naturals and Coordinators, right?" Milly looked back up into the sky and smiled as a small bird sped across her field of view and disappeared into a nearby tree. "If we were to criticize what they are, I know that it will be purely out of jealousy. Don't you think?"

"But... but... "

She smiled at her. "But what, Fallon?"

"But if they weren't here to begin with, then everything will not be as it is! The human race will not be divided into two!"

"And you blame them, the Coordinators, for existing? Isn't it that all human beings were Naturals before? So that must mean..." Miriallia put a finger to her lip, pretending to think. "Naturals created Coordinators. So in actuality, Naturals are to blame, right?"

"But...! No! That was a long time ago!"

Miriallia raised the finger she had pressed to her lip in emphasis. "Exactly! It was a long time ago. You see? If we keep on searching for someone to blame, it will all come down to things we wouldn't even dare accept. I tell you the truth now, but you yourself would not accept it. If this is so, then what is the truth for, when no one wants to believe it? This is our reality. We can't change it. All we can do is accept it, which isn't that hard to do, really." She smiled at her. "I used to want to kill Dearka myself."

This caught Fallon's interest. "You did?" Unaware that she had sat down on the bench next to Miriallia, her eyes widening in curiosity, she prodded her to tell of her story.

"Yes... I had wanted so much to kill him, because I was awfully depressed about something." She did not bother to tell her of the reason why. "But then, I just couldn't do it... "

"Why?"

"Because I knew that it wouldn't have changed anything. I wanted to be free from that hatred." Milly cast her eyes down at the memory of Fllay and the bitterness that consumed her.

_I am not like you... _Those were her words to her then. And she stood by that declaration.

She looked up and saw Fallon staring at her.

"My sister died in Heliopolis," she said quietly. "She was seventeen. We got to the shelters but it was full so she begged the people inside to at least take me in. She told me that she will get in on the nearest shelter and meet me in Orb... but she never made it... Everything just went up into a big explosion and when the shelter I was in opened, we were already here. I didn't have anywhere else to go, and I got into this crowd that had lost their families in the Heliopolis attack and then... well... this happened."

Milly shook her head. "I'm so sorry to hear that. We all lost a lot in that war... Both sides suffered so much... " And with this, she leaned forward and gave her a hug. But even before she could speak, Fallon looked up at her and said in a very grave voice, "Did you know? Blue Cosmos had always had a strong hold on the EA?"

Miriallia felt her insides turn into ice... But then again, why was it that she was not surprised? Shaking away the feeling, she pulled away when she heard someone walk towards them from behind. It was Dearka, his ear no longer bleeding, but she could see small but deep bite marks on it. She felt Fallon grip her arm tightly and hid behind her shoulder at the sight of the tan boy.

"She didn't hurt you, did she?" Dearka asked worriedly as he approached them, hie eyes never leaving the girl.

Milly shook her head. "No. Everything is fine. We were just talking."

Dearka eyes the girl doubtfully. "What are you planning now?"

Fallon stuck out her tongue at him. "Go to hell!!!"

Milly sighed in resignation. Maybe she didn't hate Dearka because he was a Coordinator. Maybe he just hated Dearka per se. That was probably why Athrun never had a hard time with her.

As she watched Fallon stare at Dearka with those eyes, she noticed a faint blush rise to her cheeks right before she looked away.

_Or maybe, she doesn't hate him at all... _

Milly laughed to herself.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Lacus leaned on the window pane of the empty classroom, enjoying the warm orange rays of the sun as it made its slow and ceremonious descent behind the mountains in the west. She was waiting for Kira to come fetch her, and he was running a bit late. She did not mind. She knew that he had seen his parents off to the airport in their return to Orb.

She giggled to herself at the memory of talking to Kira's parents. It was such an enjoyable chat with his mother about the Freedom pilot's childhood. She did not know Kira had an extreme dislike of frogs.

They were such a handsome pair, the Yamatos. She tried to imagine herself and Kira growing old together and ended up in a fit of giggles when she could not picture it well, as an image of Kira and a frog popped into her mind.

"What are you giggling about?" asked a voice from behind her.

Lacus whirled around, ready to greet Kira, but gasped when she ended up nose-to-nose with an enormous stuffed bear with a yellow ribbon tied around its neck. "Oh, my!"

Just then, Kira's face appeared from behind the bear, and much to the songstress' pleasure, he was smiling, those once sad eyes glittering as it reflected the orange light of the sun coming from the window behind her. "Hi there. Sorry I'm late. Have you been waiting long?"

She shook her head and smiled. "Oh, no. Not at all. I knew you were coming soon anyway."

"Yeah, I had to pass by the orphanage to make a rain check on the kids for tonight's story night." With this, he handed her the toy. "Here, this is for you. Do you like it?"

Lacus blinked a couple of times, overwhelmed by the size of the unexpected gift. "Oh! Thank you. How thoughtful! It's so big!" She giggled and hugged the bear tightly. "And soft! What is the occasion?"

Kira shrugged, taking his place beside her near the window. "That is in honor of you being here in my life right now," he said silently, not looking at her, but at the setting sun.

Lacus laughed gaily. "I love it, Kira. Thank you so much. Now I will have something to cuddle at night. By the way, why did you postpone your story night?"

Kira turned those lovely eyes at her. "We are going out to eat as we haven't really gone out on a dinner date without my parents around, which is pathetic for a guy like me." He brushed a bit of overly long locks of brown hair out of his eyes. "And then we will watch Cagalli's live broadcast of her speech later in the night."

This made the songstress stare at him questioningly. "They will show something with a political theme here in Japan? But I thought they did not allow that."

"Athrun pulled some strings, I suppose. With Kisaka and Dellit's help."

Lacus clapped her hands together in glee. "How wonderful! I cannot wait to hear it!"

This brought an even wider smile on Kira's lips. "You seem quite perky today. Anything happen that I should know of?"

Well, there really wasn't anything that happened today, except for the fact that Kira was finally recovering from his slump. Shaking her head, her long, long hair swishing down her shoulders, she clung to Kira's arm and they turned to the mountains as the orange ball of fire sunk even lower.

Sighing contentedly, she could not help but remember that time when she had nursed Kira back to health in one of the PLANTs. Wasn't it that they had also watched the sunset together? What did she say to him then again?

"Wouldn't it be nice, if we could stay like this forever?" Kira asked her as if reading her mind.

Lacus raised her eyes to him in surprise. "You remembered."

"How could I forget?" He wrapped an arm around her waist lightly as his eyes met hers. They were happy eyes now... The most beautiful eyes in the universe. "Lacus?"

"Kira?"

"Stay with me like this forever," he whispered huskily, resting his forehead against hers, leaning forward, ready to give her a kiss...

Shyly, Lacus pulled away. "Wait!" she exclaimed, startling Kira and somehow disappointing him. Hurrying to ease his feelings, she covered the big bear's eyes and giggled. "We don't want to forever destroy his young and innocent mind, now do we?"

Somehow a bit bewildered, yet at the same time relieved, Kira laughed and covered the bear's ears as well. "I guess you're right. Now kiss me. Or do I have to throw him out the window to do so?"

Slightly blushing at Kira's sudden urgency for intimacy, she would not lie to herself by saying she did not feel the same. Standing on tiptoe, her hands still pressed on the bear's eyes as Kira's covering the ears, she closed her eyes as their lips met for the first ever kiss she had shared with him after so long a wait. His lips tasted like... well, like toothpaste. Which was a good thing. Now every time she would brush her teeth, she would remember this day. It was not a long kiss, just a brief touch, a whisper of a kiss that said more than anything that he was, finally, and undeniably, hers. Lacus opened her eyes and stared at him silently, his forehead still pressed on hers.

Breathing deeply, eyes still closed, Kira smiled idiotically, then moaned under his breath. "I love you... Don't ever get sick of me."

And Lacus felt her heart flutter to the setting sun. "I love you, too, Kira.... And I will never get sick of you... "

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

"What on earth did you do to her that made her act all behaved?" Dearka asked as he and Miriallia were walking along the sidewalk on the way back to the Haww residence for a quick change of formal clothes for the Appearance of Princess Cagalli Yula Attha.

His girlfriend glanced at him sideways in the corner of her eye, and squeezed his arm tightly as she clung onto him closer. "Nothing. We were just talking."

Now in all honesty, he could not digest the fact that Miriallia and Athrun were actually having such an easy time with that Fallon friggin' Bryaritt, while here he was, barely escaping with his ear intact!

What a crazy girl! Ugh! Good thing she was going to disappear from his existence tomorrow. Hurray!!!

"I swear, that girl has a vengeance at making my shift with her a living hell! What did I ever do to her that made her this mad at me?"

Miriallia giggled. "That's the point. Nothing."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

She giggled even more. It was starting to freak him out. "Isn't it obvious, Dearka? The girl has a crush on you!"

The Buster pilot missed a step, then almost fell on his face on the pavement. "_What?! _Miriallia, you're making me nervous! Don't talk that way. Besides, the girl hates me." The mere thought of it made him want to crawl out of his skin.

His girlfriend looked up at him under her lashed, an evil grin swimming around in her pretty face. "It's a girl thing, actually. Trust me, she has a crush on you. She just doesn't know it yet." Pinching his side playfully, making Dearka jump, she laughed and said, "Why do you keep on attracting so many girls? It's starting to make me insecure."

"What do you mean _'attracting girl'_? I have not been doing such a thing."

"Quit lying to yourself. Don't tell me you haven't noticed our cute neighbor looking out of her bedroom window every morning while you were lifting weights, shirtless, in our back lawn for the past two days?"

Dearka stared at her as if she had sprouted antlers. "What?"

"Or that blonde working for the ice cream shop who gave you free marshmallow toppings, right after giving you a sly wink?"

"I have no - "

"Or how about that redhead who followed you around while you were jogging yesterday?"

"Honestly - !"

She smiled wickedly. "Don't tell me you haven't noticed all of those." She pretended to count with her fingers. "So that's the neighbor, the blonde, the redhead, and now Fallon! You average two girls a day, Elthman!"

He was starting to feel sick. He honestly, sincerely, did not know of what she was talking about. It was just like him to be totally oblivious of his surroundings, and maybe Miriallia was not totally convinced that he really, really does not notice whatever was taking place if it did not out-right introduce itself in his face. The last thing he wanted was Miriallia thinking he was not being faithful. He tugged at her hair gently. "Stop kidding around."

Miriallia laughed happily. "Surely, you must have known?"

"Unfortunately, not. Are we going to finally have our very first fight?"

Miriallia's eyes widened in incredulity. "Who said anything about a fight? I was merely pointing out the obvious."

Dearka felt his stomach do flip-flops at this comment. "And what might that 'obvious' thing be?"

She smiled at him warmly, snuggling closer to him and tugging at his good ear. "That I am extremely lucky, and that it is indeed very flattering to know that a lot of girls out there will kill for a guy like you, thus making them very jealous of me."

It was a mystery how such simple words could boost oneself-esteem, especially after having to hear that one person say it, making you feel so very much important, making you feel so very much special, and so very much loved. He breathed in the strawberry scent of her hair and found himself asking all that is good on what he had done to deserve this. He had not been nice, and he had not been generous, but it seemed like he had fortune smiling down at him the moment she came into his life…

And look! He wasn't even stuttering or acting like a fool in front of her!

Feeling quite proud of himself for having finally overcome his retarded state every time he was around her, he kissed her on the temple and said, "I'm the lucky one. Where else can I find someone like you?"

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! He had said something that came close to being sweet and romantic and he did it without looking and sounding like a moron!!! Hurray!!!

"Oh, Dearka, don't move!" Milly suddenly said and Dearka froze as she raised her hand to his cheek and tilted his head to the left. "Your ear is bleeding again." And without another word, she leaned forward and gently nibbled at his earlobe with moist, unbelievably soft lips. He felt her suck on it a bit before pulling away and explaining. "Your ear was bleeding."

And that wasn't the only thing that was bleeding. Unconsciously, he raised his hand to his nose as he felt something warm and wet on his upper lip.

"Your nose is bleeding, too!" Miriallia exclaimed, suddenly feeling worried.

_Grrrrrrrr!!!_

Dearka wiped the blood with the sleeve of his shirt and tried to hide his very red, very hot face from her. "Don't worry about it."

But in fact, Miriallia was not at all worried. She actually looked happy. "Ha-ha!!"

Dearka eyed her reproachfully. "What?"

"I just found your sweet spot!"

He swore he could have burst into flames at what she said. "Why do you enjoy embarrassing me so much?"

Laughing, she shook her head and once again gripped his arm, resuming their walk. "Sorry. You just look totally adorable that way."

The Buster pilot sniffed, trying to make the bleeding stop. He was about to say something when Miriallia suddenly shoved her pink handkerchief shaped into a cone into his left nostril.

"You love making me look stupid, don't you?" he said, laughing a little.

She smiled sweetly, looking absolutely naughty. "Yes. Now let's hurry. We don't want to be late…"

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Yzak sat on the bench in front of the bus stop, looking up at the low hanging moon up in the cloudless sky, and stood up when a bus screeched to a halt right beside him. After a few seconds, he saw Kari hop out of the door and made her way to him.

He had been waiting for about thirty minutes there, as he did not want to be late and make her wait too much. He knew how girls were when it came to waiting. He could remember his mother throwing a fit when he showed up two minutes late. He really did not mind. He had spent those minutes making himself remember that he will say something nice to her for a change.

"Hello," he said as she stopped right in front of her, once again probing his face with those lustrous green eyes.

_Good, Yzak. Hello is a nice word. Go on…_

"Hi," she replied, blinking at him, waiting for him to say something again.

_Now what?_

He smirked. "Took you long enough."

_Dammit!!!_

She smiled. "Sorry, I'm late."

Yzak stared at her, waiting for an explanation why she was late. None came, so he shrugged and held out his right hand, hiding his left as it was still a bit raw. He _will _be nice today. "How was your day?"

_Go, Yzak!_

"Tiring, but otherwise fine." She took his hand in hers, slipping her fingers through his and grinning up at him, her eyes closing in the process. "How was yours? What did you do all day?"

_I punched a hole through our door._

"The usual. Nothing."

_This is good. We are talking. This is healthy._

She nodded as they proceeded to walk the long streets back to the women's RQ. "Kian is doing much better now."

Yzak frowned at the mention of the name. He could not get over his utter distaste for the guy, even with the knowledge that he was Kari's brother. "That's good to hear."

_Very good, Yzak._

She looked up at him, somehow a bit curious. "Is it true? Cagalli's public appearance will be aired live tonight? I heard people in Higashimokoto talk about it."

He nodded."Yeah. Athrun called. So I'm sure it's true."

_Very good._

"Would you like to watch it together with Kira and Lacus?"

He shook his head. "Kira went out earlier, probably out to have dinner with Lacus. He had a bear with him."

"A bear?"

"Yeah."

"Oh."

And they fell silent, continuing their pilgrimage down the street.

_Say something._

"We… we can watch it together if you want," he muttered grudgingly.

She nodded quickly. "I would love to."

More silence.

_Say something again!_

"So… "

"Hmm?"

"About the MemS…?"

_Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!! Why did you bring this up!!!_

She looked up at him questioningly. "What about it? You don't mind, do you?"

_Too late… _

"No, it's just that… I had been thinking. About the recording mechanism you put there… It recorded Kira's thoughts, right?"

She looked interested. "Yes. Yes it did…"

"But you said just yesterday, that Milly used the machine, too, right?"

She was _very _interested. "Oh, my… Yes… yes she did…"

Yzak had been thinking about it the whole time, as he was apparently going to be the guinea pig for this experiment of hers. He decided that he might as well try to help her make sure he wasn't going to go crazy after his second use… "I never saw Miriallia's memories, Kari… Not even a faint glimpse of it…"

That got her thinking. "Huh? But, that can't be right."

They had somehow come out with a theory regarding the memories the machine brought out, and based from their hypothesis, it could only relive negative memories for some unexplainable reason. But now, that theory had to be automatically trashed. Miriallia had her share of negative memories, but how come the MemS never recorded them?

She thought for a while, then as if brushing away an annoying fly, she shook her head and looked up into the sky. "We'll try to find out when we try it on again, okay? Maybe next time, we can patch our memories through, no?"

He stared at her skeptically. "Sure. Whatever."

She blinked at him a few times, then lowered her nose to his shirt. "Yzak? Are you wearing cologne?"

He flushed a bright red. Well, yes. He was wearing just a spray of cologne… "Huh? Why?"

She inhaled his shirt, then inhaled again. "You smell… you smell good… "

He blushed even more. How was a guy supposed to react to that kind of comment? "Err… well… "

_Note to self: Always wear cologne._

She smiled up at him. "Have you eaten dinner yet?"

"No. I was waiting for you."

She laughed gaily. "I see. Shall order some Japanese food for a change?"

Yzak congratulated himself for being relatively nice today. "Yeah, whatever."

_Very good._

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

The appearance was held in the Gathering Complex half an hour's drive away, and since it was big enough, many people we accommodated easily.

Athrun watched with pride as Cagalli – who was wearing a green dress, even after having asked his advice about which one to wear – walked in front of the high platform, right behind the wooden podium. He looked over his shoulder and nodded as he saw a number of members of the different houses in Orb – along with couple hundred spectators - all waiting, he knew, for Cagalli to screw up. But he had faith in the Princess that she will pull this through. She always does.

He watched as Cagalli rested her arms lightly on the podium and let her eyes roam the spacious place around as if to look for something, and then he saw her pale a bit at the sight of a handful of cameramen lingering around, trying, but failing miserably, to act invisible.

He turned beside him where Dearka was sitting, and his friend nodded encouragingly, as if he were the one giving the speech.

Looking over to the side of the stage, where Miriallia was sitting together with a strangely behaved Fallon, he nodded at her and she waved back. Fallon, however, was looking straight at Dearka with those deadpanned green eyes in a way that made him chuckle softly. If he hadn't known any better, he'd say she was ogling him.

Diverting his attention from the two girls, he let his eyes travel back to Cagalli, and much to his surprise, she was holding no papers or small cards. Instead, she was merely looking at the crowd with a determined look and a conspicuous-looking book in one hand.

By the gods, she was beautiful, standing there all calm and composed. He found his hand feeling at his chest, making sure the amulet she gave him was still there. _That's right, Cagalli. Do it your way._

"Good evening to all of you." Cagalli started, her voice sounding too loud in the microphone. She blinked in surprise and continued in a much lower tone. "Glad to be back home at last. You don't know how much paper I've wasted in trying to make a speech for tonight, but only ended up as far as the greeting. So, after realizing that I cannot write a speech, I stand here before you in an annoyingly drafty dress, and an aching leg from trying to chase someone for bringing me the greatest discomfort in my life so far." She eyes Athrun with a deadly look, causing the Justice pilot to fiddle with his collar nervously. The audience laughed.

"Anyway, as you can see, I have nothing on me. It was just now did I realize that the reason why I never got the chance to make a speech is because of two things. One, I don't like writing speeches, and two, I do not like reading speeches. So if you're expecting a pompous speech, then you're about to get the greatest disappointment of your life.

"Right now, I have no grand words of wisdom to share, except for this story." And with that, she opened the book to the first page. "Once upon a time, in a deep, green forest, lived two families of monkeys."

At the start of her story, people all started to murmur a bit, then finally settled down when they saw Cagalli was dead serious.

"The first family had long, long tails that they used to swing from one branch to another, while the other family had no tails at all. But aside from that, there was nothing different about them. Both families had rich, brow fur and big dark eyes. Everything was the same about them, except, of course for their tails. And because of this single difference, they hated each other.

"The family of long-tails thought that the no-tails were disgusting creatures that did not deserve to share their forest, and the no-tails thought the long-tails were arrogant beasts who loved to show off their tails. And so the end result of their hatred was war.

"But no one ever knew that deep inside this forest, amid the war and the fighting and the killing, there were two monkeys falling in love… Tiki, a girl from the long-tail family, and Liska, a boy from the no-tail family."

Athrun nodded as Cagalli gave him a brief glance, as if to make sure he was still there. She then looked around to see if the adults were still listening, and looked quite relieved to see that they were.

"Now they knew that they could never be together so long as the war between their family wages on, and so together, they tried to think of a plan. Day and night they did nothing but think, and think, and think and think some more… But they could not think of anything at all. Liska was so tired of all the fighting, that he asked for Tiki to run away with him." The princess paused a bit to take a breath then went on.

"'_Come away with me, Tiki, and let us leave the senseless killing,' _said Liska as he met with his beloved secretly under a coconut tree in the edge of the forest. _'But we cannot, dear, we cannot,' _pleaded Tiki. _'We simply cannot run away from what we are, and what our families are. We may be able to run away from the fighting, but never from who we are.'."_

Athrun nodded as his Cagalli read on, his heart going out to her as she started to read the simple story meant to educate children.

"Liska was so angry, because he knew Tiki was right. He was so angry, that he clenched his hands into fists and slammed it into the coconut tree so hard that a single fruit fell from the branches. It was a high drop and so the coconut was broken in two. Tiki looked at it for a long time, and she started to think. She picked up the fruit with both hands and stared at Liska with joy. _'Liska, my love, I think I know how to end the war once in for all…' _she said excitedly. _'How?' _asked Liska as he looked down at the fruit in her hands. Joyously climbing the tree for more fruit, Tiki started to explain. _'Hurry, Liska, and help me. We shall make the perfect armor for our families to use in the battle that will end everything! Quickly! Cut the fruit open in two!_' Liska, who still could not understand clearly, gathered all the fruit Tiki was dropping and started to do what his beloved said."

Athrun's eyes widened in amazement, somehow knowing what the monkeys were going to do next. He felt Dearka slap him on the shoulder, giving him a commendable smile. "You have a wise girl up there, Zala."

Athrun smiled back. "I know." And he waited for Cagalli to continue with her story. He was no longer surprised to see that everyone else was also waiting.

"Taking as many sliced coconuts as they could, Tiki explained to Liska what they should make their families do. _'Take these to your no-tail family, beloved, and tell them this: This armor will protect you from the enemy, and will promise you a quick victory. Let them wear it, and so will I ask my family to do so. Then we will see what happens.'_

"And so, they went their separate ways, each carrying their armor. When they reached their families, they said what they had planned. '_This armor will protect you from the enemy, and will promise you a quick victory._' Eagerly, both families rejoiced at the brilliant idea of wearing armor for their battles. So they all started wearing the armor fruit, unknowingly to them, concealing their bodies from sight, **_along with their tails_**. And so with one final order, the two families started off for war, marching along the forest grounds with the confidence that this will be the final battle that they will have to face, as they were wearing armor, and thus guaranteed to win.

"The two families marched on and met in the very heart of the forest. Tiki and Liska were hiding in the trees and bushes, waiting for what was going to happen with their plan. _'You have stolen our idea, disgusting no-tails!'_ screamed on of Tiki's family. _'No! You have stolen ours!_' said Liska's kin. And the fighting started, lasting for hours on end, many monkeys, all wearing armor, all tails and the absence of one, hidden from the forest, fought and fell, and when only a number of monkeys remain standing, Tiki and Liska jumped out of their hiding place, and bellowed, '_Take off your armor, one and all!!! Let us see who has won this war!!!_' And one by one, those who remain standing all shed their coconut armor.

"And an unbearable silence fell in the forest as those who have removed their clothing were and assortment of no-tails and long-tails. _'Look around you, my family, and tell me what you see. Death is around you, your own brother or sister or father or mother dying in your own hands. What difference is it that some have a tail and some do not? All of us are monkeys that live in this forest. Who is to say who shall live and who shall die? All of us are monkeys, one and all.'_"

With this, Cagalli closed the book without bothering to finish the story. Looking up at the people listening to her, she raised her voice loud to make sure that everyone who was listening would hear. "Who is to say who shall live and who shall die? Who is it to say who is wrong or who is right? We make mistakes _because _we are not perfect, all of us. We are not perfect _because _we are human. Look around you, people of Earth. We are not Naturals, not Coordinators. We are merely… " She paused, breathing in hard, as if worried if what she was saying was making any sense. "We are merely _human_. All wrapped in our own little delusions of tails and none." She waved the book in front of everyone to see. "If you're curious about the ending, the monkeys all got along in the end. If monkeys could learn a thing or two, I don't see why we couldn't, either." She nodded, signaling the end of her speech. "Now let's all get out of here do something productive. Let's have dinner."

And even before she could crack another smart remark, Athrun stood up, followed by Dearka and Miriallia, starting a deafening round of applause. Athrun watched Cagalli's eyes widened in disbelief as everyone got to their feet, simultaneously erupting into a respectful cheer for the sixteen-year old princess who told adults all over the world a story meant for children.

Athrun laughed as the Princess wiped a small tear from the corner of her eye, and continued to clap until his hands hurt.

_Well, done, Cagalli. Well done._

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_**If you're going to ask, yes I do love children's books. I find them very entertaining and quite educational when you try to dig deep into it… **_

_**LOL! (Asks Kari to hand out "positive reinforcements" in the form of plain M&M's) Thank you for the reviews, even if I still am trying to gain momentum in writing, as there are too many little bunnies running up and down my brain at the moment. Pardon this chapter. I have yet to discipline myself more when it comes to writing these kinds of stuff. **_


	27. Phase 27: To Hope

_**Yuugiri: Hello! Been a while since I updated. So sorry about that. Have been so busy being all responsible, especially since my mom and dad left after the holidays. Am surprising myself. LOL! Actually getting things I wouldn't normally do, done! Anyways! I'm sure you don't care about that boring stuff. Hehe! Here's the chappie! **_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed.**_

_**0 - 0 - 0 - 0**_

_**July 24, AW**_

The problem with Cagalli Yula Attha was that unlike everyone else who thought they did not have enough time in their hands, she had too much. But unfortunately did not have enough energy to match it. It was only nine in the morning, and already she was feeling tired.

There, sitting in her office, her hands folded quite suspiciously polite on her lap, was Fallon Bryaritt, who was supposedly bound for Japan last Thursday. It had been four days since they had detained her and still no ship willing to take responsibility for a minor. It was starting to take its toll on the princess, not to mention Dearka Elthman, who had been repeatedly sending her pitiful glances every time they meet in the Attha mansion grounds. Glances that said if she did not get rid of Fallon soon enough, he will be committing suicide sometime in the very near future.

Cagalli, her blond head buried in her hands at the moment, looked up gratefully when Miriallia walked into the room, quite flustered as she closed the door behind her. "Sorry it took long. He was... in so much pain... "

"Is Dearka all right?" Cagalli asked, straightening her back on her swivel chair, pushing aside a pile of papers to rest her elbows on the surface of her desk.

Milly looked down at Fallon, who toothily smiled up at her – how does Miriallia do it- then sat down beside her and nodded at the princess. "He's still crouched in the guest room and he kept on groaning incoherently. But I think he's just doing that to escape his job." She then turned to the girl next to her. "That was not nice, Fallon. Kneeing a guy between the legs in not something a girl should be doing."

Fallon grinned up at her sheepishly. "Sorry."

Cagalli shivered, for the first time actually regretting her doing the same thing to Athrun before. Shaking her head in frustration, she sighed. "I guess I really wouldn't have any choice. You'll have to stay here, or at least until our time here in Orb is up."

This remark made Milly's orange head shoot up in confusion. "What do you mean?"

This made Cagalli smile a small smile. It was the same reaction she had when Kisaka and Murrue had cornered her in the kitchen when she was getting a sandwich and a glass of juice. They had wanted to talk about the requested memorial she had finally scheduled for the end of the month, but aside from that, something else of equally grave importance.

_"I guess all they really needed was to know what the Light of Orb thought of, huh?" Murrue said, patting her proudly on the shoulder. "What are your plans now?"_

_"Well, aside from the fact that I will rejoice for the blessedness of not having angered anyone with my speech, nothing really. To tell you honestly, I was afraid I'd have either the EA or ZAFT mad at me for using monkeys to symbolize them. But then that was the only thing I could think of at such short notice. You don't think I've offended anyone, do you?" Cagalli asked as she offered Murrue and Kisaka a sandwich and something to drink._

_"With a child's story? How could they be mad at that? You did a perfectly good job at easing out the biases in the country. Now all we need to concentrate on is the memorial, and after that, more reconstruction," Kisaka said, accepting a glass of juice as he, the former Captain and the princess settled down on the kitchen table. "Your father would have been proud of you, Cagalli. But now I am afraid I must bring you some unexpected news..."_

_Cagalli casually bit into her sandwich and nodded. "Fire away."_

_"Now that you have established bridges between the two groups, however feeble the bridge still is, I will have you sent back to Abashiri after the memorial."_

_Blinking in disbelief, the princess stopped her chewing. "Are you serious?"_

_"Your brother is there, after all. And his parents – they have met him, by the way – have encouraged his studies which have been rudely interrupted by the destruction of Heliopolis, and I do not see the reason why you shouldn't get to your studies as well. I understand that you are very much needed here, but as I honor your father dearly, I cannot help but make sure you get the best in this life. Are you up to it?"_

There really wasn't anything she could do about it. And in fact, she was looking forward to it. Kisaka and Murrue had assured her that the other representatives would take care of things in the meantime.

Athrun, of course, had been ecstatic. He said he was looking forward to going back to school, and that he was looking forward to seeing the seasons change in Abashiri. For someone who had spent majority of his time within enclosed, simulated spaces, he was excited to see the seasons change for real.

Explaining this briefly to Milly, she then asked to be excused. Standing up and making her way across the room, she turned to Miriallia and scratched her head ruefully. There were so many things to do still, and already she felt like collapsing...

"I'm going to the construction site in Kaguya today with Erika, Milly. Will you be okay with Fallon here since Dearka can't stand well?" The question made her grin a bit.

Her friend nodded, and she saw Fallon eye her suspiciously as she pressed closer to Milly's side. "I will. Don't worry. Aren't you going to take Athrun with you to the site?"

Cagalli shook her head wearily. Athrun had insisted then, but she told him that she'd rather check it out by herself.

For personal reasons not even Athrun can share with her. Or at least not yet.

"Not today. Anyway, tell Dearka of the news. I guess at that time, we can take Fallon with us to Abashiri then."

Milly smiled. "I guess it's for the best."

Nodding tiredly, Cagalli exited the room and was about to proceed to her own room when she heard an unfamiliar sound floating up the stairs from the living room below. Blinking in wonder at what that could be, she slowly made her way to the stairs and peered cautiously over the railings.

It sounded like someone playing the piano…

At the sound of light, gentle-sounding melodies filling the naturally quiet Attha Mansion, Cagalli could not believe her eyes when she saw the source of the music as soon as she made her way down the stairs.

There, sitting on the large, dark wood piano, his eyes closed and fingers gliding swiftly across the piano keys, was none other than Athrun Zala, making a beautiful rendition of _Dawn's Carriage _that usually sounded more appealing in acoustic.

At the sight of him playing such a touching song – and to play it quite well at that - her jaw dropped tactlessly. Luckily, she recovered fast and hid behind the wall that separated the piano from the rest of the living room, closing her own eyes as she listened to his playing. Her eyes snapped back open when the music stopped.

"You can show yourself now, Cagalli. I could hear you a mile away."

Poking her head through the door, she waved and smiled. "I wasn't trying to hide from you. I just wanted to listen. You're getting really good at that."

Athrun patted the empty space next to him. "Come here. Sit down. You look terrible. You sure you're okay?"

Settling next to him as he placed his fingers gingerly on the piano, she leaned her head on his shoulder as he once again resumed the wonderfully sad song. "Tired, really. So very tired..." Closing her eyes, she breathed in his familiarly fruity scent of soap and after-shave.

Hearing a murmur from her boyfriend as he stopped playing and slowly touched her cheek with one hand, she blinked. "Want me to give you a massage?"

She found herself shaking her head. "No," she murmured. "Please, keep playing that song. I... love that song... "

And so being the obedient, understanding boyfriend that he was, he did so.

For some weird reason, the song brought back so many memories that she had been trying to shove out of her brain because she kept on telling herself to be strong. And for once, after so long a time, memories of her father started to fill her mind.

She had tried her best to keep her father's legacy alive, however difficult it had been. And she honestly did not know if she was succeeding. Her father had been a great man. And in comparison, she felt like a failure. But she trusted in her father's judgment, and so she did her best not to question him and his memory. He died in order for her to live...

Oh, God how she missed him so much...

Erika was waiting for her in Kaguya where the Mass Driver was being once again reconstructed to open the air between PLANT and Orb. This was also her choice to be the venue of the Memorial of Honors.

She couldn't think of any other place more perfect that Kaguya, where the Light of Humanity – or so her father had termed it – had been launched from. It was also the place where she had lost her dear father.

But remarkably, she held no bitterness. She did not blame the Earth Alliance for that loss. She knew that to generalize all of them in the EA was something that a neutral Commander should not do. She knew for a fact that there are a few good men in the EA – Burin Dellit being one of them – and had decided to herself that both parties, ZAFT and the EA, had been led by the necks by certain people. She had also noticed that now that Murata Azrael's claws had been pried off the Alliance, they seemed to have quieted down a noticeably great degree. As it is with the PLANTs, when Patrick Zala, unbelievably Athrun's father, was gone. It goes to show how it needed only one man to ruin the ideals of a people.

Thank goodness it was all over. And with this, Cagalli had been more than grateful to move on.

"Athrun?" she started.

"Yeah?"

"Can you play this song for the Memorial of Honors?"

He fell silent, his hands evidently pausing but immediately recovering and he rested his temple on her head. "Of course, Cagalli. If you'd want me to."

She smiled silently. "Thank you. And Athrun?"

"Yeah?"

"Can you do me a favor?"

"Anything."

"Can you allot a budget for a shuttle that will fetch Kira and Lacus, and if he'd want to come, Yzak too. I would like them to be here on the Memorial... Can you do that for me?"

"Sure thing. Is that all?"

"That would be more than enough. Then all of us can go back to Abashiri together..." She opened her eyes and was about to close them again when she suddenly remembered something. "Athrun?"

"What is it?"

"I was talking with Kira on the phone yesterday. And he said that Yzak and Kari are going out. Is it true?"

Athrun missed a note and almost fell out of his seat. "He is? They are? Is the sky falling?"

Cagalli raised her eyes at him tiredly, then laughed. "I guess you're right. Yzak doesn't seem to be that type of person to fall in love with anyone. Kira was probably pulling my leg... " She leaned her head back on Athrun's shoulder, and the Justice pilot resumed playing her favorite song.

_**0 - 0 - 0 - 0**_

Yzak did not know why he had that weird feeling that the experiment was going to fail. Yesterday, when they tried out the MemS again, he did not see any difference from when he used it the first time. One, he had been plagued by Kira's depressed and frightened memories. Two, Miriallia's memories did not show up at all. And three, he was still not able to see Kari's thoughts.

One thing's for sure, though. He was hating the shit out of it. He had knocked the gear off of him as soon as he was booted out of those hideous machines, sweat pouring out of his forehead, screamed at Kari loudly, and ended up making her smile at him serenely and making her say an apology for not knowing the answer.

And as if that was not bad enough, she kissed him on the lips ever so lightly in the way that made his insides do somersaults for a reason he could not fathom. Then she asked him the question that he could not believe struck so much fear in his heart that he wanted to run away and crawl into a hole.

_"Are you doing anything Sunday?"_

_"No. Why?"_

_"Would you mind if you take me to this place? I swear I have never been here before, but in my memories, I have vague recollections of being there at least twice. Maybe it can help us with our research."_

It was funny how Kari had immediately turned this project into. All of a sudden, it was _their _project... But as usual, he did not have the balls to say no to her. She was simply too... _special_... to refuse.

But now, as he looked down at the pink fluff of cotton candy in one hand and a huge bucket of popcorn in another, he immediately asked himself why oh why he ever agreed to go out with her without _asking _first where the heck they were going.

She had dragged him into an amusement park an hour and a half away from Abashiri into the neighboring town of Kitami.

With hundreds upon hundreds of screaming kids pulling their parents along to get on the roller coaster or those tiny cars that you drive and ram against another tiny car.

The smell in the air was a mixture of buttery popcorn and roasting hotdogs. It was making Yzak salivate more than he liked. And with Kari buying almost every kind of food she could get her hands on, he was most certainly not liking it.

He jumped when a voice suddenly spoke in his ear, causing him to spill a bit of the popcorn from its bucket.

It was Kari.

"Are you all right?" she asked as she tilted her head to the side. Yzak stared at her, then found his eyes drifting down to the assortment of food and drinks assembled strategically on a plastic tray in her hands.

Yzak scowled down at her and yelled loud enough for her to hear him over the disgruntled sound of a boy being sick in the nearby trashcan a few feet from them. "You brought me to a carnival, Kari! Of all the places where I get to be surrounded by sweaty, stinky children screaming their lungs out and throwing all over the place after eating so much junk food then riding a roller coaster! Now answer me this: _Why?_"

Her answer came in the form of a calm smile as she shoved the food into his face. "I already told you why. My memories tell me that I have been here before, but I swear that I have never even dreamed of coming here." Her eyes wandered sadly around her. Ironically sad eyes amid all the laughter and cheer that normally would make one - except of course Yzak – quite jolly.

In an instant, the Duel pilot started to feel guilty. He did not have the right to yell at her, no matter how well she took his attitude. Sighing in frustration, he dumped the popcorn bucket along with the rest of the food on the tray, then took it from her hands, and in return exchanging the puffy cotton candy with her. "Kari, at least tell me this. What is it you want me to see? What is it in the Memory Simulators that you want me to discover?" It had been a question plaguing him ever since that day she asked him to patch a network between the MemS.

Those green eyes (Oh, God so beautiful eyes!) met his bright blue ones, and for the first time ever, he saw an emotion that had never been there before: fear. But it was gone a split second that he began to wonder if ever it had been there to begin with. She replaced it with that secretive smile of hers. "A part of me that I never got the chance to show anyone before."

And that was the end of that conversation. Yzak was more than happy to let it die as they made their way through the throng of people and found an empty bench that faced the ride called Anchors A-Weigh; a boat that swung back and forth, making the passengers look like they were going to fall over. Settling on the bench and Kari sitting next to him, he handed her a hotdog.

"Why did you get so much food anyway?" he asked, staring down at the tray and grimacing when he saw a burrito pressing against some reddish stuff in a cardboard container, making it look like a bloody piece of human flesh.

Kari took the hotdog from him and smiled. "I love hotdogs." Once again avoiding the question. Ugh...

But this time, Yzak wanted to demand for answers. Not only was he getting freaked out by everything that was happening right now, what with Kari randomly mentioning something morbid, like dying or something that concerned afterlife or reincarnation. For the past four days, he had grown quite an attachment to her. For some reason, he loved having her around as much as he tried to deny it. She would appear out of nowhere to startle him in corners, stealing kisses from him in the hallway and making him love having her around in the afternoon while Kira was away. And so her sudden words about death bothered him like hell. He did not like having her say such things at all. "Okay, now you listen here." He slammed the tray down next to him, startling a passing child, making her lose her grip on the balloon she was holding and causing her to cry and run off. Yzak didn't give a damn. "Now It's been a week since we've been going out and you've been plugging me to that friggin' machine of yours like I was a friggin' guinea pig. Now if you don't tell me what's going on, Kari... I'll... I'll... "

She leaned forward intently, as if encouraging him to continue. But he could not think of anything to threaten her with. And even if he did, he didn't believe he'd be able to go through with it. Her eyes, big and round, blinked a few times, annoying him to bits.

Growling under his breath, he turned away from her and watched the boat go back and forth, watching all the kids riding it scream shrilly. He knew that this was the last place where they should talk, especially since he wanted to ask so many questions he desperately needed answers.

_Who the heck are you, Kari? Who the friggin' heck are you?_

For a few moments, they sat there silently, looking out at the ride in front of them and at nothing else. He slouched on the bench, shoving the tray further from him. His mind was reeling. Thoughts of what he had been putting together about his mystery of a girlfriend swam through his brain, but it was as if he was putting together pieces of a puzzle that did not match. In the corner of his eye, he studied her as she silently and happily consumed the hotdog, her strawberry blond hair tucked behind her ear, showing off those silver studs for him to see.

"Yzak?" she asked when she had swallowed a bite of her food, then turned to him with a neutral look.

"Now what?" he grumbled.

She blinked a few times and started to speak, saying something that made Yzak pause. "I... don't remember loving hotdogs... "

"What?"

She blinked again, then shook her head as if it weren't that important at all. "Forget it."

She was driving him mad, how she'd start a topic only to abruptly end it in a heartbeat. Scratching his head vigorously, he decided to just not talk to her altogether while she stuffed her face. Come to think of it, they had spent majority of their time eating. Chinese food, Japanese food, Italian, Mexican. It was a wonder how she could stay so thin. The thought made him feel somewhat better. At least he had a girlfriend who did not obsess with her figure too much. That would have been a pain...

At the newly realized appreciation for the girl sitting next to him, he turned to the tray beside him and grabbed the bloody-flesh-looking burrito, bit into it savagely and was pleased to find out it was quite tasty. And so they sat there in silence, eating all the stuff Kari had bought for them to consume, which took about twenty or so minutes until they were really sick.

Letting out a satisfied burp behind his hands, the Duel pilot turned to Kari who was now chewing on a Tootsie Roll. She did not look back at him, which was definitely a change. It gave him the opportunity to examine her profile without having to be that defensive about it.

She looked so good to him, having her looking so alluringly simple in her loose shirt and jeans, not even a speck of make-up on her young face. For the millionth time that week he asked himself if it were possible for any Natural girl to have such perfect skin... He had never met anyone who possessed such translucent skin... She appeared to be glowing in the morning sunlight. Once again, he wondered what she really was. It was so hard to define her emotions as she seemed to be an expert in shielding those from him, however she tried to make him see.

But as he looked at her chewing silently that Tootsie Roll, oblivious of him staring at her, he decided once and for all that he really did not care. He did not want to know what she was. He just wanted her.

But it will take more than the _GENESIS _canon and the _CYCLOPS _system put together to make him tell her that, or anybody for that matter!

Finally, she seemed to have realized he was looking at her, and Yzak dared himself not to look away, not even caring if she read what he was thinking. In fact, he would be glad if she did, then he would have an excuse not to tell her out loud what he thought. She smiled at him after stuffing the last of the sweet gooey thing into her mouth, then inched nearer him and slipped her arm through his, doing what she always did to his forearm; picking at the small hairs on his skin. Then of course, she answered his silent question. "I've asked that question so many times, Yzak. Who am I? Why am I here? But then again who hasn't, right?"

"You know perfectly well that that's not what I mean."

She leaned her head on his chest and nodded, looking up as she saw the boat finally stop its swinging. "I know. But you do know that I will not hesitate to tell you if only I knew the answer, right?" Yzak felt her bury her nose into his shirt again, inhaling deeply, then letting her breathe out in a huff. "Do me a favor, okay?"

"That depends. What kind of favor?"

"If I could have just one request... Please keep on loving me... even if I don't find out who I am... "

This made the Duel pilot pause, and he felt everything stop moving along with his heart. He did not even know how to respond to her request, as he never really admitted to her verbally of his feelings, and in reality did not have any plans of admitting it to her anytime soon. Slipping his fingers through hers, he sighed and wordlessly rested his temple on the top of her head.

"Kari?" he started.

"Mm?"

"Let's go ride that wheel thing we passed a few hours ago. What did you call it again?"

"The Ferris Wheel?"

"Yeah. That. It looked... amusing."

She nodded her head slowly, then inhaled his scent once again, making the light-haired boy blush. "All right. Let's go."

_**0 - 0 - 0 - 0**_

The way in which things were going, what with everything remarkably going his way, Kira was really stoked. He had actually been smiling idiotically for the past four days (annoying the heck out of Yzak, who had been quite mellow as well, lately), happy that he and Lacus were getting along quite well. He knew as much, since he hasn't received one single complaint from the pink-haired songstress.

Strolling contentedly down the empty park, Eiko riding on his shoulders, both of them singing Old McDonald at the top of their lungs, he was once again looking forward to seeing Lacus, who was probably waiting for them near the fountain in the middle of that park. They had promised Eiko a day in Kitami Family Land, a theme park about an hour and a half away by bus, and so here they were.

Kira adjusted the blue baseball cap Lacus had given to him over his head and stopped singing when he saw his girlfriend waving at them, dressed in casual jeans and a blouse, and the blue baseball cap that matched his.

"Lacus!" Eiko cried as she wriggled off of Kira's shoulders and darted towards her as fast as her stubby little feet could carry her. She flung her arms around the songstress lovingly and Lacus giggled at her enthusiasm. "Kira taught me Old McDonald! You know, that farmer guy who had lots of animals! He had a duck, a cow... "

Kira laughed as he went to Lacus' side to plant a kiss on her cheek, letting Eiko ramble about the animals in Old McDonald's farm. "Hi there. Have you been waiting long?"

"I just got here, really. And guess who I brought along with me?" she said as she dug into her small tote bag hanging over her shoulder and out popped a pink bouncing ball.

Eiko was ecstatic. "Mister Pink!"

"_Whateverrrrrrrrr!" _the Haro shrilled, hovering a few times around the child's head then bounced off over the benches in the corner, making Eiko run after it, leaving Kira and Lacus to a more than welcome privacy.

Kira took the advantage of kissing Lacus again, making her blush slightly. "I've missed you. How was your sleep last night? Torii didn't keep you up, did he?"

Lacus shook her head, making her long, pink ponytail swish down her back. "He was noisy, all right. But I was not bothered at all."

"That's good."

His little mechanical pet, Torii, which Athrun had given him years ago, seem to have loose screws in its mech. He noticed that the moment they had transferred in Abashiri and so had decided to switch it off until Athrun found the time between his lessons to tinker with it. Unfortunately, he was not able to make time and had flown off to Orb without getting the chance to take a look at it. Kira had unearthed it from his closet yesterday and decided to turn it on to check on it, which, he discovered too late was a bad idea. It darted out of his palm the moment he switched the power on, flew across the room and nearly hit Yzak as he was coming out of the bathroom. The Duel pilot was outraged and immediately threatened Kira that if he did not shut it down again, he will dispose of it himself. They tried to catch it, but every time Kira would try to shut it down, it would squirm and peck at his hand. Now Torii had become a Haro with a beak and talons, which raised the danger of it running loose a full one-hundred percent. Lacus, who was used to dealing with annoying little machines, volunteered to keep it with her. Remarkably, she was doing a better job with it.

They did not waste time in getting on the bus to Kitami, as Eiko was jumping up and down with Mr. Pink like a kangaroo. The trip was peaceful, really. The little girl had spent the one hour sleeping on Lacus' lap, hugging to her the Haro, waking up the moment the bus had stopped right in front of the very crowded theme park.

Walking hand in hand, with Eiko skipping in between them, they bumped into the person they least expected to see in such a place.

There, squatting on the grass right outside the women's public rest room, head hanging forlornly, was Yzak, an empty plastic cup in his hand.

Kira was about to approach him when Eiko suddenly disengaged herself from their grip and hurried off to the unaware Duel pilot, stuffing her tiny hands into her dress pocket and, much to Kira's surprise, dropped a lone coin in the empty plastic cup he was holding. Kira saw Lacus cover her mouth with one hand in an attempt to stop herself from giggling.

And slowly, jerkily, Yzak raised his head to pin a death glare at the little Eiko. Afraid that Yzak might scare the child away, he rushed to her side and scooped her up in his arms. Lacus followed suit.

Yzak scowled as he too got to his feet once he saw Kira and Lacus. "What the...?" he muttered as his gaze traveled from Eiko, to Lacus, to Kira.

Kira blinked a couple of times, before finally realizing why Yzak was staring at them like that. His eyes widened as he produced a stammering explanation. "Oh, no. Eiko is from the orphanage. We're taking her here for a bit of fun."

Yzak grumbled under his breath. "Whatever," was all he said and looked over his shoulder when a very pale Kari staggered out of the women's rest room. Kira had never seen Yzak look so worried in his life when he rushed over and placed one hand on her waist and another one by her elbow.

Kira watched as the Duel pilot, the same one who usually did not care about anything that did not concern him, lower his face to her ear and whispered not low enough to escape his enhanced hearing. "Are you all right?"

Kari nodded meekly, not looking all right at all. "I threw up twice. I don't think it did me any good, riding the Ferris wheel after eating so much..." With that, she buried her face into Yzak's chest and groaned.

"Do you need water? Anything?" Yzak asked.

Kari only moaned in his shirt.

Kira, looking really amazed at Yzak's soothing behavior, felt Lacus touch his arm gently and smiled at him. "Let's go and leave them alone. Yzak can handle this by himself."

Kira nodded, trusting Lacus was right about that. They walked away after murmuring a faint goodbye to Yzak, with Eiko looking over his shoulder to gaze at the interestingly mismatched couple. Suddenly remembering what she just did, Kira laughed and pinched Eiko's nose, making her squeal in delight. "Naughty girl, dropping a coin in Yzak's cup."

"My mommy said that you should give to the needy. He looked like he needed something," Eiko explained as Kira put her down between him and Lacus as they proceeded across the throng of people to the merry-go-round, which was the only ride Eiko could get on to without adult supervision.

This made Lacus laugh out loud. "How very nice of you, sweetie. I'm sure Mr. Jule is grateful."

Kira could not help but guffaw. Hardly. Hurrying Eiko along to the queue for the merry-go-round, as he wanted a bit of privacy with Lacus, he turned to the songstress the moment she was on one of the horses on the ride.

"Athrun called earlier," he started, resting his arms on the railings where many parents were waving at their children who were on the merry-go-round.

Lacus leaned her back on the rails and tilted her head to face him. "Is that right? How are they? Were you able to talk to Cagalli?"

Kira shook his head. "Ever since her speech, no. She's been awfully busy with the memorial, which is one of the reasons why Athrun called. He wants us to be there on the thirty-first of July for the Memorial of Honors."

Lacus bit her lip, casting her eyes to the ground. "To honor our fallen?"

The Freedom pilot nodded. "Our fallen."

It had been such a long time since he had actually thought about those he had lost in the war. It was a long list of names; friends, acquaintances and strangers alike, killed by his own hands or by another. The mere thought of it depressed him, but as he felt Lacus touch his cheek briefly, he smiled at her. He was through taking the blame for everything. "I'm okay," he assured her, taking her hand in his, making her sigh in relief.

"I know you are, Kira," was all she ever said, silently caressing his face with those deep blue eyes.

Both of them looked up when Eiko yelled at them from her pink pony as she passed by the first round on the kiddie ride. Kira waved at her. "Way to ride that horsie, cowgirl!" he bellowed and kept on waving until she disappeared for another turn.

Lacus followed his gaze. "She likes you a lot, doesn't she?"

Kira shrugged. "Strong girl. She hardly even thinks about her parents, and she doesn't even cry when she remembers them."

Lacus nodded. "Very strong indeed."

Kira laughed, a bit embarrassed. "I could definitely take after her. You know, be strong and not cry all the time."

This time, Lacus laughed at him. "You underestimate yourself too much, Kira." She looked up at the sky and squinted as a bit of sun got into her eye. "We all have our own definition of bravery and strength. But as far as I could tell, we all did our jobs with as much courage as we could muster. And that is more than enough for me."

As the brown-haired boy laid his eyes on her, he could not help but detect a faint glint of sadness in her eyes. He had always wanted to know what she thought of the things that happened in the war, about her home in the PLANTs, or about her father...

As if reading his mind, she laughed a little and leaned her head on his shoulder. "It hurts to know that I never even got the chance to say goodbye to my father before... you know... "

Kira cast his eyes down, not really knowing what to say. He was a bit relieved when she continued without asking him to reinforce her point.

"He was a responsible father. A great man who saw farther than most. I had always admired him." She sighed a bit then tried to shift her head, looking for a more comfortable position. "I miss him so much."

After a moment of silence, when Kira saw she wouldn't continue what she was saying, he wrapped an arm around her waist and nudged her a bit. "The fact that you got to know him, to have grown up to inherit his thoughts and principles, I guess you could consider yourself lucky, right?"

She nodded faintly. "But I guess daddy's little girl will always long for her daddy. I wish he was here..." Then after that very short, very serious conversation, she looked up at him and rubbed her cute nose against his. "Then I would have someone walking me down the aisle when we get married."

Kira blinked in rapid succession, his face heating up so fast that he thought he was going to faint. But aside from the uncomfortably warm feeling on his face, he felt totally cozy inside. Smiling, he leaned his forehead on hers, closing his eyes and inhaling her sweet baby powder scent. "I suppose you're right, Lacus."

_**0 - 0 - 0 - 0**_

Miriallia gently knocked on the door of the guest room and slowly opened it, peeking inside and saw Dearka adorably curled up into a ball in the middle of the bed, his head tucked in between his knees, his arms wrapped around his legs.

"Dearka? You all right?" she asked as she entered and closed the door behind her. She saw the Buster pilot raised his head at the sound of her voice. He did not look like he was in too much pain, but then again, she had never really experienced being a guy and being kneed in the groin before...

He unknotted himself from the tight position and slowly got up into a sitting position on the bed. "I'm fine. It doesn't hurt that much. But man! That was a strong blow! I swear that kid is super strong!"

Miriallia frowned as she sat down on the bed next to him and ran a hand through his hair. What was really weird about Fallon, what Dearka said was right. The girl seemed to have too much energy for an ordinary girl... And she was undeniably strong. She had witnessed her manhandle Dearka two days ago, when they were playing a short round of basketball. She had tackled him to the ground when he didn't let her steal the ball from her. At first, she thought that Dearka was merely letting the girl do whatever she wanted, as she was weaker. But right now, she knew that Dearka would not have allowed her to hurt him in such a disgraceful way. "Well, next time, be careful okay?"

He snorted. "You wouldn't have to tell me twice. I wouldn't close one eye on her. Never ever," he said with conviction. With that he fell back on the bed, his feet on the floor.

Miriallia laughed gaily as she fixed the buttons on his polo shirt. "Oh, don't be so over dramatic. She has a crush on you, that's why she's like that."

Dearka stared at her as if she were mad. "She almost murdered my hopes and dreams of having kids, Miriallia. The girl does not have a crush on me. She wants me to die. The mere thought makes me want to throw up."

Miriallia raised one sculpted eyebrow. "Dreams of having kids, you say?"

At that, he blushed deeply, making his already dark face darker. "Well, yeah... What of it?" he asked defensively, and was about to get up when Milly slammed him down flat on the bed with her forearm, pressing down on him with all her upper body weight. He looked so scared as she loomed her face near him. It was always very entertaining to see him squirm like that. She had taken the pleasure of making him awfully uncomfortable by trying to "seduce" him. She was evil, she knew it. But she didn't care. He was so concerned of being a _perfect _gentleman, because _she _was perfect that she had made a sport out of making him try to break his own delusions of perfection.

"How many kids?" she asked huskily whispering in his ear. She felt him shake under her, his hands gripping the bed sheet so tight he looked like he was holding on for dear life.

Dearka answered after swallowing hard. "How... many? Well, err... I never really thought of it... the number of kids, I mean."

Loving every second of making him sweat, she propped her elbow on his chest, then rested her head on her palm, looking down at his face with a naughty grin. "My father said no less than five... " she drawled, drawing lazy circles around the side of his neck, making him swallow harder.

The tan boy's lavender eyes darted from left to right, as if searching for anything to help him out. "Uhm... five... yes... five is a good number... "

She let her hand travel from his neck to his lower lip, caressing his mouth then his chin. She was such an evil girlfriend. "Uh-huh..."

But when she was about to make him squirm even more, he caught her by surprise when his hand sprung to her wrist, twisting it around and in one swift move, she was on her back on the bed, and him supporting his upper body weight on her. Gasping in alarm, she could not say anything. This was the first ever move that Dearka did when it came to flirting. It was either he'd freeze up when she tried to cuddle him, or simply not react at all with her stolen kisses. Having him aggressively swing her around, she was dumbfounded.

Dearka narrowed his eyes at her. "Now you listen here, little missy. You always make me feel uncomfortable in the most unlikely of places. You take pleasure in seeing me break a sweat after you walk in on me naked in the bathroom, but I try to understand. You make my nose bleed in the streets by friggin' sucking on my ear, but I said fine! I totally try to be oblivious of all the women trying to hit on me, but instead of supporting me, you actually find the humor in having them wolf me down!" He slammed one hand over her shoulder, making her gasp again. "Now before I met you, I loved to play around. I was on every girl up in the PLANTs so long as she was pretty. I loved girls. I loved looking at them, I liked being around them, and what the heck! They love being around me!" He took a deep breath and continued in a rush. "But ever since I met you, I don't know what happened to me. I honestly don't notice girls following me, as you so diligently point out. Once, I loved to play around, but right now, I can't even look at you when you step out of the shower with only a towel around you, thinking that it's not proper. I will always so desperately want to kiss you, but deep down inside, I don't know what to feel about it, if you'd think I was being too aggressive."

Mirallia reminded herself to breathe as she listened silently to what he had to say. This was also another first. He had never raised his voice at her ever since they became a couple. And for some weird reason, she liked it. It was better than having him stutter all the time.

But much to her surprise, he still had something more to say. "I don't want you to think that I'm treating you the way I treated the girls in my past. You're different. But every time I try to be at my best around you, you make it so damn hard! You friggin' suck on my ear! Or... or walk in on me while I'm taking a friggin' bath! What is wrong with you? I try so desperately to make everything work out between us by being proper and you drive me to the edge of reason by... by... "

Miriallia bit her lip. "By what?"

He groaned. "By looking so damn good to me I want to kiss you." He wilted then and there.

Miriallia raised her eyes at him and found him looking back at her. "So kiss me," she said.

Dearka inhaled sharply, staring at her with those eyes that always seemed to look boyish and serious all at the same time. And for the first time since they became a couple, he actually initiated this kiss. Lowering his face to hers, their lips met in the most electrifying kiss Miriallia had ever felt. This was a kiss that was not stolen, not rushed. This was something he wanted to do.

Miriallia decided they were the best kisses in the universe.

She did not know that this was what he had always felt towards her, his constant battle of becoming perfect for her. She also felt a bit jealous about his talks of "other girls" from his past. But the feeling was immediately erased when the kiss deepened. It was like being swept off her feet after a dizzy spell. She felt him touch the side of her face and –

Suddenly, the door flew open, and both of them froze for about a second. Slowly, Miriallia and Dearka looked up from the bed just in time to see a flash of short, dirty-blond hair dashing out of the room in a hurry, pulling the door hard behind her.

Miriallia met Dearka's gaze as he got up and helped her sit up on the bed. "Was that... Fallon?"

_**0 - 0 - 0 - 0**_

The first thing that met Cagalli when she reached Kaguya was a smiling Murrue holding a bouquet of hand-folded paper flowers. She was definitely looking better now, even better than when they last talked.

"Cagalli! How are you?" she exclaimed as she dumped the flowers in the arms of a petite girl who came rushing towards them at the sight of Murrue.

"I'm very well, thank you," she replied, looking around in awe at the progress of the place. She remembered walking the same grounds right after the Earth Alliance attack a few moths ago. Death had hung in the air like a curse, but now, one would never think anything ever happened in Kaguya. Squat buildings, the same she had remembered before everything happened, stood in straight rows in the clearing, and residential houses were scattered everywhere. Murrue had immediately explained that relocations for the citizens of Orb were going on as they speak. But what caught Cagalli's attention was the towering Mass Driver sloped near the cliffs in the ocean seen from about half a mile away, reflecting the bright rays of the sun as it reached its apex that noon.

"A beauty, isn't she?" the former captain said as she followed the princess' gaze. "The dry docks are accessible, too. Kisaka had arranged with the PLANT representatives to honor us with their presence."

This made Cagalli nod. She had made sure at least one of them would come. "Who is coming?"

"Ezaria Jule."

Cagalli's head snapped up, alert. "Yzak's mother?"

She nodded. "No arguments there. Did you know she was one of the radicals in the Council?" she asked, slightly amused. "But then again, as far as what Andy had explained to us, it seemed that the Council members were all led by the scruff of their necks by Patrick Zala's twisted beliefs. She seemed to have been very eager to come down to Earth to open new doors in Coordinator-Natural relationships. She heard your speech, by the way. It was broadcasted in the PLANTs, too. They loved it."

Cagalli tried to cover her reddening cheeks with a frown. "I didn't know that it reached up to space," she said, feeling slightly proud of herself.

Murrue chuckled silently, then patted her on the shoulder. "Well it did, but all for the best. So, how is Athrun?"

Cagalli shook her head tiredly. "He looks all right, but I know better. The Memorial of Honors is a celebration where we honor the loved ones we've lost in battle, but I know he's torn from mourning for a father he had lost, or cursing a Commander that had ordered him to be arrested after declaring him a traitor to the PLANTs."

"It must be hard. He is in a very difficult position right now. While there is pretty much a lot of forgiveness to go around with, Athrun looks like he's having a hard time forgiving his father for what he's done, huh?"

Cagalli rubbed her eyes, suddenly feeling the need to lie down. "Who could blame him? How painful is it to have your own father point a gun at you and shoot without so much as a shred of love for your own flesh and blood. I guess he has as much regret as the next person. It just hurts me to know that there is nothing I can do."

Murrue nodded. "We all have our own hang-ups to deal with. You have your own father to mourn about."

"Yeah, but unlike my father, who died loving me, his died with him wanting his son to blow everyone up." She knew. She was there when Patrick Zala died... She shook her head. "Let's talk about something else. What are those paper flowers for?"

Murrue smiled at the mention of the tiny little objects. "Pretty aren't they? Erika wanted to cast them to the sea in the memorial after the sermon of Reverend Malchio. We did this in the debris belt up in space. Very poetic, don't you think?"

"Yeah, I guess," she said absentmindedly. She looked up at the former Captain and smiled weakly. "Did the EA accept the invitation?"

Murrue seemed quite surprised by her question. "Well, yes of course. Burin Dellit will be here. Along with a few Earth Alliance representatives from all over the globe."

Cagalli hesitated a bit, then continued. "What will they do to you? And the crew of the Archangel?"

She blinked at her with unreadable eyes, then looked away as if deep in thought. "Nothing. What could they do?"

"You were a traitor to the EA, right?"

This made her raise her eyebrows. "As far as I could tell, we were traitors to Blue Cosmos, not the EA. Something that Burin Dellit actually understands. But anyway, it is of the least importance. Ezaria will be the only one coming, as Zala supporters are still running amok in the PLANTs. But at least one representative is better than none. Will Yzak come to Orb along with Kira and Lacus?"

"I asked Athrun to arrange that. I'll know once I return to the mansion."

"How about that girl? Fallon?"

At the memory of the feisty Blue Cosmos Supporter, Cagalli felt even more drained. "She's still here. We might actually have to take her with us when we go back to Japan. I guess it's the only way. Unless you've found any relative we can send her back to?"

With this, Murrue brightened. "Ah, now that you've mentioned it, Erika had done some research about her. And did you know she is a half-breed?"

Cagalli scratched her head in confusion. "What? Oh, God. Don't tell me she's half Coordinator half Natural."

Murrue nodded. "Funny, huh? For someone who hates Coordinators, she actually has Coordinator blood. We found out that she used to live in Heliopolis with her sister and mother. She was able to escape in the shuttles, her sister was not fortunate enough. According to witnesses, her mother was able to board a shuttle herself. And guess what?"

The princess felt sick. "What?"

"Her mother was actually on the shuttle Kira had brought in when we first escaped from the colony."

And the world titled dangerously to the right. "But that shuttle... "

Murrue nodded silently. "Was destroyed in the descent back to Earth..."

_Humans, we are capable of so much horror..._

Cagalli hung her head as she heard this. "Where was her father?"

"No one knows. The father was the Coordinator, you know. Maybe he died early, maybe he ran off. No one really knows. But so far, that's the only thing we know of her. No more relatives. Poor child."

"Yeah..."

Murrue shook her head and looked up into the direction of the dry docks. "Let's hope everything turns out for the best from now on."

Cagalli nodded, then followed Murrue's gaze. "Let's hope... That's the only thing we can do, after all..."

_**0 - 0 - 0 - 0**_

Athrun stopped playing and looked up from the white keys of the piano at the sound of someone coming in the room. He felt the blood drain from his face at the sight of Miriallia, standing there awkwardly with a glass of juice in one hand and a book in another. Smiling uncertainly, he waved a bit and sighed in relief when he saw her smile back.

This was the first time he had actually found himself alone with her... Cagalli was away in Kaguya and he had seen Dearka running around about a few moments ago, in search of the missing Fallon.

He had never really thought it would come to this that they will have to talk with no one else around them. He was starting to feel really uneasy, until she moved from her place and placed the glass of juice right in front of him. "I just thought you might be thirsty. You've been in here for hours."

He did not know what to think of the gesture. He and Miriallia had never really been close. And for good reason. He was the one who had killed Tolle, Miriallia's boyfriend back then. Nodding in gratitude, he gestured at the chair nearest to the piano. "Sit down. What brings you here all alone?"

She smiled meekly as she settled on the chair and folded her hands neatly on her lap. "Dearka's gone in search for Fallon. We saw her running around in the back lawn, and so he went off to save her from herself." She nodded at the piano. "You're getting really good at that."

Atrhun scratched his head. "Thanks. I love playing it. It makes me... remember my past..."

She looked at her intently. "How weird. While many are trying to forget, you want to remember?"

He smiled at her comment. He rested his fingers on the piano and struck a few chords. "My friend Nicol, he played the piano. He was fifteen years old, and he loved music. He would carry notes in his uniform, kept it in his locker. I didn't even know why he did it. He just did." His fingers scaled the lower octave as he shrugged. "I guess I'm playing this in honor of him. He was a good friend of mine."

Her soft eyes softened even more as she nodded in understanding. "He was the pilot of the Blitz, wasn't he?"

A stabbing, searing pain crossed his heart at the mention of the machine in which he had died in. "Yes. He was... "

Miriallia tilted her head to the right. "He died the same day Tolle died."

Athrun's head snapped up and his hands stayed paralyzed on the piano keys. He knew all too well who Tolle was. After all, he had killed him. Lowering his eyes to his hands, he sighed. "Mir, I never got the chance to say this to you, but... I truly am sorry."

A small sound came from her that made Athrun look up. She was smiling at him. "Why do you apologize to me for doing what you had to do?" Now it was her turn to lower her eyes. "You are hurting as I am hurting. Who's to say who was at fault? Not you, and certainly not me. I forgave you the moment I saw you. Or maybe even before that... " She looked up at him. "We were all victims here, Athrun. So please stop looking at me like that. I would appreciate if we just don't think about it."

And for the first time in a long time, Athrun felt like he was freed from some unseen prison at the knowledge that Miriallia was not holding anything against him. And that she never really did...

She opened the book in her hands and smiled. "May I sit here for a while and listen to you play?"

Athrun laughed softy and nodded, took a big gulp of the juice she had brought in for him, then played with a heart that felt ten times lighter.

_**0 - 0 - 0 - 0**_

Yzak guided Kari by the elbow as she drunkenly leaned against him, once again sickening up. The Duel pilot jumped back a bit before she threw up on him, missing his shoes by mere inches. She had been like this ever since they got on the Ferris Wheel, especially when the gondola would swoop down. It was not fast, really, and it most certainly was not scary, but Kari had started feeling dizzy by the time the wheel made its second descent.

And now, they were standing right in front of her house, as she insisted on going there instead of her dorm, knocking on the door and waiting for Mrs. Takano to open it quickly.

And soon enough, the door of their small but quaint house opened and they lumbered in with the A.U. Guidance councilor gasping in worry. "Kari! What has happened to you?"

Kari tried to answer but ended up gagging violently. Luckily no vomit came out. Yzak pushed her hair back from her sweaty face while he answered the question for her. "I took her to the theme park in Kitami - "

But even before he could continue, Mrs Takano burst out happily. "You took her to the theme park?"

Yzak stared at her weirdly. "Yes..." he said uncertainly as he sat Kari down on the couch. "Do you have some water? Maybe some oral suspension? She's been sick like this for about an hour now."

Mrs. Takano appeared not to have heard him. "She loves the theme park! She most especially loves the roller coaster! Tell me, did she ride it?"

Starting to get slightly annoyed, Yzak stared at the woman, suddenly feeling a certain hatred that was not there before. "No, Mrs. Takano. She didn't ride the roller coaster. She could hardly stand the Ferris Wheel. Now, the water?"

His tone made the lady jump in alert and muttered some apology while rushing off to get some.

Yzak cared little about where she went when he looked down at Kari who had slumped on the couch like a rag doll. Kneeling by her side, he placed a hand on her face and peered into her half-closed eyes. "Kari? Are you okay? Do you need to throw up more?"

She shook her head softly, and then stopped immediately when it seemed that moving her head made things worse. "I'm going to be all right... Can you take me to my room? I need to lie down. Everything is spinning... "

Yzak grunted in acknowledgement and helped her to her feet. She weakly gave him directions as to where to go, and after treading through the house Yzak hardly even looked at, he found himself inside a fairly large room full of books and magazines neatly stacked up in shelves and the desk shoved by the window. As Yzak examined Kari's bedroom, the girl did not wait for him to tuck her in. She immediately crashed on the bed on top of the comforter, her face pressed on her yellow and blue pillows. He took one last look at the room and rushed over to her side. Dammit! He shouldn't have asked her to ride that stupid wheel!

"Kari?" he whispered as he once again kneeled by the bed and placed a hand on her head, thumbing her fine hair. "Are you sleeping?"

She did not respond but her breathing was heavy. She was probably still very dizzy, so maybe it would be better if he just left now. Leaning forward, he whispered in her ear. "I'll see you at school tomorrow. I'm leaving." And that was it. Hesitating just a bit, not knowing what to do, his eyes darted to the door which he left open, then quickly planted a kiss on her ear. Getting up as if he had just stolen something, he was about to get the heck out of there when something caught his eye.

There, sitting so innocently on the neatly kept desk, was the same picture of Kari he had seen in her locker...

Immediately, as if not even thinking, which was rare for Yzak Jule, his feet took him to the photo at once, his fingers gingerly picking up the glossy piece of paper and his eyes glided through the image of an older smiling Kari with her very long, very shiny hair.

Yzak did not know why the heck he felt suddenly so uncomfortable at the sight of it. This cannot possibly be Kari. The girl in the photo could be more or less in her early twenties!

"Being nosy, are we?"

Yzak turned around calmly as Mrs. Takano appeared by the doorway holding a small cup of something hot. His hand gripped the photo tightly, as if he was afraid it would disappear. "It was just here. I couldn't help but look."

The guidance councilor gave him an odd look, then walked towards him. Swiftly, she snapped the photo out of his hand and stared at it herself. After that, she casually slipped it in her breast pocket. "I see."

Yzak felt the hairs at the back of his neck stand on end as he watched the lady proceed to the bed, her back to him as she examined Kari intently. "So you went to the amusement park, and she started getting sick?"

Yzak stiffened. "Yes. I guess that's understandable. She ate so much."

The Duel pilot blinked when he saw Mrs. Takano go rigid. "She... ate a lot? What did she eat?"

"Lots of stuff. Hotdogs, burritos, cotton candy. The works. Why?"

It took her a while to answer, but the only thing he said didn't satisfy his curiosity. "Hmm, that is weird."

It was then did Yzak finally decide that he wanted answers. His girlfriend had been acting like this schizophrenic person who's claiming she's having weird memories of someone who isn't her... It might help if he actually asked the mother.

He opened his mouth to speak, but Mrs.Takano spoke even before he did. "You may leave now, Yzak. Thank you for bringing Kari home. She will be all right now. Don't worry. She will be at school tomorrow."

Yzak narrowed his eyes at her. "Mrs. Takano. What is going on with Kari? She's been going on and on about seeing memories that aren't hers. She says things about - "

"You may go now, Mr. Jule," Mrs. Takano said a little more sharply, and Yzak snapped his mouth shut. It was then did he remember what Kari had said to him.

"_You want to hear about my memories?"_

_"You sound so surprised. Aren't I allowed to be concerned for someone once in a while?"_

_ "It's not that. It's just that... Even my own mother wouldn't want to hear about it... Telling me that it's probably nothing... And you want to hear about it?"_

He clenched his hands into fists as his eyes grazed Kari's unconscious form. Deciding that he will probably not get any answers here, he turned around and left.

Maybe, just maybe, he knew exactly where he could get the answers that he needed to end Kari's misery.

_**0 - 0 - 0 - 0**_

_**Yuugiri: I would like to thank everyone who has taken the time to read and review this story of mine. If only I could just thank you one by one, I would... But I want you to know that you all are the reason why I strive to make my updates better than the last, although at times I happen to fall below your expectations. **_

_**All your suggestions and comments have truly improved my writing a great degree, and for that I am entirely grateful. I don't know why I needed to say this to you, but I felt it quite appropriate to give you guys the credit for this story. There are a few of you who'd e-mail me asking for the missing chapters, and there are some of you who'd review many times just to give me a link that will help me get things through! All of it is appreciated. Then there are some of you who'd make me feel better even if I myself wasn't satisfied with my work, and some even stand up for me for occasions that I never expected they would. **_

_**You guys make writing so enjoyable. **_

_**But I have to say this, contrary to my expectations, you guys are actually liking Kari! (is in shock) Makes me kind of torn between... err... pursuing my plans for her, as I too am a fan of happy endings. I think that real life is full of misery to write about more misery, and maybe that is why I love happy endings. Some of you are staring to make guesses about who Kari is, and I must say...SOME OF YOU ARE RIGHT. I was honestly aiming for her not to have a too-happy ending with Yzak, as I love to put a bit of angst here and there... sigh! **_

_**Well, anyway, those who want to make Yzak and Kari happy, raise your right hand and say AYE!**_


	28. Phase 28: A Flower For Athrun

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed.**_

_**0 - 0 - 0 - 0**_

_**July 31, AW : 7:30 am **_

Cagalli found Athrun sitting on the window sill of the library, silently looking out into the front yard where Fallon had just tackled an unsuspecting Dearka to the ground while he was picking up the volleyball that had fallen out of the court where he and Miriallia were playing a short game. The princess merely frowned in disgust at the sight of the fifteen-year-old girl. If she had her way, she would have had that girl locked up and away from trouble. As far as she could see it, she had been deliberately invading Miriallia and Dearka's personal time, and Miriallia was simply too nice to tell her to get lost.

_No wonder she is such a handful. She's half-Coordinator..._

But of course, this thought barely lingered in her mind when she saw Athrun sigh dejectedly. She took a deep breath and approached him, hugging him from behind. "Hi there, stranger."

Athrun jumped a bit, which made Cagalli pull away and stare at him in surprise. She had startled him? Strange... He blinked a couple of times in confusion then smiled brightly at the sight of her.

"Hello there," he greeted, pulling her to him. "Did you need me?"

The princess merely shook her head as she looked out of the window. Dearka was screaming frantically as Fallon grabbed him by the leg, twisting it around in an odd angle, rendering the Buster pilot helpless. Miriallia worriedly tried to pry Fallon away from him. "I was just wondering where you were. I've been looking everywhere for you."

For some reason, ever since she had finalized a date for the memorial, Athrun had been acting like a zombie for the last week... Had she not been so busy with working things out, as she had a limited time before they finally return to Japan, she would have loved to sit him down and maybe talk to him about what was going on in his head. She had been dying to know, but it seemed like he was quite ready to make her guess.

Unfortunately, she did not like guessing games. Especially when it was about her man.

"You've been acting really weird lately, Athrun Zala," she pointed out tactlessly, making him raise his eyebrows a notch. "Don't try to deny it. I know when you have something in your mind. You fall into this deep silence that would be broken only when I strong-arm you into telling me what it is."

He merely looked at her with that amused expression.

She crossed her arms over her chest and pinned him a glare as if to make him say it by her will alone.

He, however, did not yield. "It's nothing, Cagalli. Really."

"You're lying to me."

"I'm not. I swear, it's nothing."

She didn't believe him one bit. In fact, she was about to press the issue when suddenly, her attention was caught by Miriallia waving at them from down below. She had successfully removed Fallon from Dearka, who was now running as far away as he possibly could from the two girls. Momentarily distracted, Cagalli waved back. She almost forgot. She was to talk to Miriallia about Fallon's identity; something she had been holding off for the past week because she was so busy with the relocation of the civilians back in Kaguya as well as the memorial itself. It had been such a busy week. She could not remember Orb ever buzzing with such activity. Even the Attha Mansion was flooded with extra people Erika had grouped together for the event.

"What are you guys doing up there?" Milly called as Fallon clung to her arm tightly.

Cagalli leaned out into the window and laughed. "Nothing. Say, Milly? Don't go anywhere, okay? I'll be right down!"

Miriallia nodded. "Weird. Dearka said he'd be coming right up."

Cagalli smiled. Good. She can talk to Miriallia alone.

Athrun nudged her with his knee. "What's that about?"

The princess pulled back from the window and shrugged. "What Murrue told me about Fallon... "

It had been such a strange revelation, the girl being half-Coordinator, half-Natural... Not only once did she ask herself if Fallon herself knew of her bloodline.

Athrun nodded in understanding. She had told him about it, and even the Justice pilot was very surprised to find this out. "So Erika said her mother and sister were both killed in the Heliopolis attack?"

"That's what I heard. If you're going to ask about the father, she never said anything about him. Only that he was not there in the Colony when the attack happened."

This caused Athrun to fall back into his silent reverie, his index finger tapping his chin intently, his eyes narrowing in thought. Cagalli could not help but feel that warm glow in her heart as she looked at him, only to discover that warm glow was of slight annoyance for somehow understanding that if he really wanted to tell her what he was feeling right now, then he would not hesitate to tell her. Leaning forward, she gently touched her lips to his forehead, once again startling him. Pulling away, Cagalli patted him on the shoulder affectionately. "I'll see you in two hours. Remember, we're fetching Kira and the others in the dry docks by nine and Ezaria Jule as well, mind you." Athrun had kept his word about making sure Kira and Lacus would be there in the memorial.

His eyes scanned her face as she backed away from him a step, and she saw his lips curve lightly into his boyish smile. "I won't forget. I can't believe you succeeded in convincing Yzak to come. And it sure surprised me when he was the one who actually volunteered to invite Kari along."

This made the Princess of Orb chuckle. "The moment he heard his mother was coming here, he was so eager to come at the same time trying to act like he didn't care. Then he asked if he could bring someone along, and when I asked him who, he just snapped at me and told me it was none of my business. He didn't tell me who he's bringing along, but who else could it be other than Kari?"

The Justice Pilot shook his head ruefully. "I suppose. So tell me, when are we leaving for Abashiri?"

Cagalli smiled her goofy smile at them mention of their return to that city. She could not believe how much she was looking forward to it. "Early tomorrow morning so that maybe we can ask them to go and tour around the place for a while. Maybe force Kira to take Lacus somewhere and we can go to the beach later tonight, as what we've planned." They had been dying to have a quiet picnic out in the beach for days now. Orb was such a small country, but she knew they would be able to enjoy their brief stay there anyway, at least right before they return to Japan. She looked out the window again and saw Milly bending forward to say something to Fallon. It was then did the door in the library open, admitting a limping Dearka, grass stains on his left sleeve and left pant leg.

"Man, that brat is going to be the death of me," was his words of greeting as he dusted his shoulder in an attempt to remove the stains. He nodded at Cagalli and sneered, making her a bit defensive. The Buster pilot seemed to love to tease her. But remarkably, he didn't say anything mean. "Can you leave us for a while? I kind of need to talk to Athrun here."

Blinking in surprise, the princess of Orb nodded in bewilderment. What could it be that they needed to talk about? Shrugging, she nodded at Dearka, and then at Athrun and made her way down the mansion where she needed to do some talking as well...

Whatever they were going to be talking about, she really did not have the time or the stamina to find out. She was really very tired already...

_**0 - 0 - 0 - 0**_

Athrun watched as Cagalli shuffled out of the library in a slight hurry, closing the door behind her. It made his heart ache to know that he could not be truthful to Cagalli about certain matters, but this was simply because he did not want her to worry. She had been doing such a fine job with everything lately, ever since her successful speech that he did not have the heart to make her compromise her plans for the sake of one person's feelings.

_My feelings..._

The Memorial of Honors was going to be aired all over the globe as delegates from all over the world as well as up in space were going to be present in the said event. Coordinator and Natural alike, all will gather for that certain moment when they will honor those that have died in the war. Everyone was looking forward to it.

Everyone but Athrun Zala.

Unlike everyone who was more than proud to cast a paper flower into the ocean, symbolizing the courage of their fallen who have fought bravely in order to achieve peace, Athrun did not know if he deserved to have a flower in honor of his father's name. Patrick Zala... He died with the hope that every single Natural die with him. Athrun clenched his hands into fists as he remembered that day very well. How could he forget? How could a son forget his father's parting words? And how could a son forget that those words were not even words of love for your own flesh and blood?

"_Fire... fire the GENESIS... "_

And that was it. Did he deserve a flower? Did he die for peace or for victory? Did he pave a way to change this world into a better one?

It pained him to know the answers to those questions. Because all of the answers where the same. No. He did not deserve a flower... He did not die for peace. He did not change anything for the better.

But then why was his heart hurting at this knowledge?

Athrun looked up when he felt someone touch his shoulder awkwardly. Dearka looked down at him from where he stood, an unreadable expression in those eyes. Athrun had always thought of Dearka as this smart-aleck cocky guy who always seemed to talk with detached sarcasm then. It was such a mystery, how peace could make a person change so much.

"You're making her worry," he said as he let his hand drop to his side, looking out of the window at the sight of Cagalli approaching Miriallia and Fallon down below. "You know she doesn't deserve it."

Athrun followed his gaze, smiling sadly. "I know. That's why I'm not telling her." He didn't even know why he was telling Dearka this. He had tried to ask for advice from him once before and it really did not get him anywhere. But it seemed like the Buster Pilot actually understood what he felt.

_We may never be parents, but all of us are sons and daughters. _

"He would always be your father, that's why," Dearka said taking his place next to him. "Tell her. Ask for a flower to honor your father's name."

Athrun snorted, somewhat trying to mask the searing pain in his heart. He had loved his father. But sometimes he could not help but ask himself if his father ever saw him other than just a subordinate. It was such a pathetic thing to ask himself. "What is it in his name that should be honored? He wanted to blow up the planet. If his name was mentioned in the memorial, it would be like throwing mud at the graves of those who died for the true cause." He closed his eyes. "If I were Cagalli, I would not give him a flower to be honored along with those who died for peace. Not even a leaf."

He heard Dearka move a bit in his place as he cleared his throat. "And what do you feel about this?"

Athrun opened his eyes, stood up and stretched. "I am totally numb inside."

He was such a liar.

Dearka stood up too. "I'm going to get changed, all right? But I'm telling you, you should tell her, and maybe she'll know what to do." With that, he left him in his silent misery. So much the better.

After a moment of standing there, his thoughts swimming, he sat back down on the sill and watched Cagalli and Miriallia talk silently to themselves, Fallon nowhere in sight. He blinked a few times and was about to call out to the two girls when he felt a presence standing right behind him. Looking over his shoulder, expecting it to be Dearka, he gasped at the sight of a tall, stocky man with his dark, thinning hair slicked back over his head. He had an over-all serene stance, with his eyes... those eyes, forever closed.

"Reverend Malchio? When did you arrive?" He asked as he stood up, then stared to feel slightly foolish since he did it out of respect, but lately discovered it didn't matter. He was blind, after all.

"Just last night, my boy." His voice was the same as the last time he had heard him speak when he landed on the island where his orphanage stood. He seemed to be that type of person who spoke little, but every word he said counted. Such a nice, soothing voice. Weird. He wondered why Cagalli never mentioned his arrival. "I thought I heard someone here. I didn't expect it would be you, Athrun Zala."

The hairs at the back of his neck stood up at the mention of his name. It was useless. His mere existence reminded him of his father. And he will be forever reminded of it till he dies. Feeling even more miserable than he already is, he tried to search for a reason for him to make his get-away. He did not know how why, but he did not find it comfortable to be around this man for too long. Maybe it was because regardless of his lack of sight, the Justice pilot felt like the man could see right through his soul. He was about to make a lame excuse to go to the bathroom when the reverend placed a hand on his shoulder. He had a firm grip, and at the same time, gentle.

Surprised, Athrun blinked a few times, trying to clear the thoughts running around his head, suddenly remembering Cagalli's metaphor of his mind being a hamster running around in its wheel. "Err... Is there anything you want me to do for you?"

And with this, the man's placid face broke into a warm smile. "If a child was raised by a thief, he will think stealing is right. The same goes with a child raised by a pastor, who will teach the child values he will wish to mold the child with."

Slightly confused, Athrun shrugged the man's hold away. The man always did speak with riddles about seeds and the like... He did not have the time of the stamina for this right now. But when the man stared to explain, the Justice pilot could not do anything but listen.

"Your father was raised the way he was. If he had grown up in another time, in another place, he would have reacted differently. I know of it."

Athrun did not know if Reverend Malchio had been eavesdropping on him and Dearka, but somehow, a mild irritation started to gnaw at his stomach. Narrowing his eyes at him, he started to talk. "There is no excuse for his behavior. He did not have the right to decide who is to live and who is to die. I never tried to make excuses for him, Reverend Malchio. Please, I beg you, do not start."

"I am starting nothing that of which everyone has started already. We are merely human after all. There are things we do not understand, and so we try to mask our weaknesses by making excuses for ourselves. Your father had his own sense of justice, and he was merely doing what he believed was right. Can you blame him for striving to fulfill justice the way he understood it?"

If he did not hear it with his own ears, he would not have believed it. Someone was actually defending his father's name. Something he himself could not do, his own son. "I don't understand this pretty well. Are you telling me that what he did was all right? He almost blew up the planet along with millions of people in it. I don't see why I should try to fool myself in thinking that he wanted what everyone wanted. _The end of the war_. Please, let's not go there. I really am not in the mood to talk about his sorry excuses to destroy everyone, with me included." Turning away, he started to walk past him, not really knowing what to do.

He stopped when Reverend Malchio spoke once again. When he spoke, one can't seem to help but listen. "People out there are forgiving each other. Naturals who have lost their loved ones in the Ptolemaeus Base and Heliopolis are grieving with Coordinators who have lost their loved ones in Junius Seven. I do not see how a son could not forgive his father for a mistake he was not even able to commit. You stopped him in time. No planet has been blown up, and we are still here."

Athrun felt his heart skip a beat at what he said. Maybe... just maybe... that direct link of blood to blood was the reason why it made it even more difficult.

How he hated his father...

But at the same time, how he missed him.

_Oh, God..._

"I have to go. I'm sorry..."

_**0 - 0 - 0 - 0 **_

"Is she okay?" Kira asked when Yzak came back alone from the plane's toilet, Kari not with him at all. The Duel pilot could only stare blankly at him and Lacus as he settled in the seat facing theirs. Kira swore he had never seen him this worried in his life, except when Kari had been throwing up in Kitami Family Land a week ago.

"She kept on telling me her head is throbbing," Yzak said hoarsely. "She's been like that since we entered Orb territory."

"A headache?" Lacus asked, worriedly leaning forward after marking a page on the thin paperback book she had started reading since they left for Orb. The book was entitled The Little Prince, and maybe he was wrong, but the book did not look at all a children's story, regardless of the title. "Maybe she is dizzy," she added.

The light-haired boy could only shake his head. "She said she's fine, but I don't know if she's just telling me that to make me shut up. She says she feels like some presence tingling in her head. A ringing sort of thing." He pulled at his hair in frustration. "I don't understand any of this. She won't tell me anything. Dammit..."

Kira watched as Yzak leaned back on his seat, covering his eyes with one hand. Sighing sadly, he turned to Lacus, but not without smiling at the sight of her today. She was wearing the same dress she wore when they first met in the Archangel when he brought in her escape pod, complete with the gold pin holding back one side of her bangs. She was going sing in the memorial later in the day, and so had decided to wear the same dress she wore in the Bloody Valentine memorial.

"Lacus, can you go check up on Kari? Maybe she needs something?"

The songstress nodded immediately. "All right, Kira." She stood up and smiled at Yzak. "Don't worry too much, Yzak. I'm sure it's nothing."

She was rewarded with a feeble grunt, making Kira grin a bit, which he hid behind one hand. He could not believe how much Yzak has shown over the last two weeks. Emotions the Freedom pilot could not believe Yzak had were popping out of nowhere, making him wonder how Kari could have done it in such a short time. As Kira watched Yzak sitting there right in front of him, absent-mindedly looking out of the window of the plane like a lost puppy, he asked himself for about the millionth time if this was a good thing. It seemed like the light-haired boy was starting to get too attached to the mysterious Karina Takano. But he guessed it was better than having him pretend like nothing else in the world mattered other than himself.

The mere sight of his roommate showing so much care for a single person made him feel pleasantly surprised. And pleasantly relieved.

Kira decided not to say anything as he examined Yzak's face in the corner of his eye. The scar marring his otherwise smooth and flawless features made him irk a bit, and he wondered what the boy really felt about it, wondered if he ever had plans of removing it anytime soon.

"Kira?" Yzak asked suddenly.

The brown-haired boy blinked in amazement, a bit dazed at the mention of his name. How seldom has he heard him say it other than Yamato? "Yes?"

Yzak narrowed his clear blue eyes at the window, huffed a bit then turned to him awkwardly. "I need your help."

Kira almost fell off his seat. Was he hearing right? Yzak was asking _help_? From _him_? That can't be right. Yzak was the embodiment of pride. He collected himself, recovering swiftly, and then cleared his throat. "Err... sure. I'll try. What is it?"

He watched those blue eyes dart uneasily from side to side, as if unsure if he should be doing this at all. "Kari has been acting really strange lately. I don't know what's going on. She keeps on talking about memories and shit, and I'm completely lost about it." He ran a hand through his fine hair, letting out a wheeze. "We are trying to find out what's wrong through the MemS - "

Kira paled at the mention of the machines.

Yzak continued hastily. "Wait, I'm not done yet."

Kira recoiled from him, the blood running cold through his veins. "Don't let me near those machines again, Yzak. I might end up destroying it if I ever do."

An emotion that once again seemed so foreign in Yzak's features crept up into his eyes; desperation. "I don't know what else to do. I'm starting to friggin' wig out about the things I've been discovering lately. I tried to talk to her mother, but it seemed like the woman has withdrawn into this shell and wouldn't even talk to me about anything at all."

Momentarily distracted, Kira blinked. Yzak was right about that. He had seen Mrs. Takano over the last two weeks, and she had been acting strange, especially in their Health class, always settled on her desk, reading some strange papers that had made him quite curious what they were. But then, he had never really tried to link it with anything that concerned Kari and Yzak… Didn't Mrs. Takano like Yzak for Kari? Could that be it?

But that can't be right. Yzak had been such a gentleman the whole two weeks…

"Did she say anything? Mrs. Takano, I mean."

Yzak snorted, clenching his hands into fists then began to pound on the armrest hard. "She doesn't say anything except that I am too nosy and it is none of my business."

Kira looked left, then right, uncomfortably trying to look at anywhere but the boy in front of him. He needed his help. And he owed him as much... "What do you want me to do?"

At that, the Duel pilot turned to him, his unbelievably clear eyes sparkling with another unknown emotion. "I need help to find answers for myself. But I can't do it alone." He nodded. "Help me figure out the MemS."

Kira swallowed hard. This was actually what he was dreading. "I can't, Yzak."

The boy leaned forward in his seat. "_Please._"

And Kira completely keeled over. Yzak said please? Oh, God. And in spite of himself, he found himself looking back at the boy anxiously. And then, he found his mouth opening slowly. "All right, Yzak. I will try."

He watched as Yzak relaxed a bit as if a heavy burden had been removed from his shoulders. He leaned back on his seat, his eyes staring straight into the ceiling of the plane. "Thank you…" was all he said, once again a word that sounded too foreign coming from this Coordinator.

Kira heaved a sigh as well. Perhaps, even Yzak needed someone to pat him on the shoulder and tell him that everything was going to be all right.

"You're welcome."

And then they were silent. Had it not been for Kari and Lacus' arrival, they would probably have remained still.

Kari had one hand on her temple as Lacus helped her to her seat next to Yzak, who immediately was on the edge of his seat, his hand touching her shoulder affectionately. It was so weird. It was really like watching a wolf caressing a rabbit…

"I'm fine," Kari said as she smiled sweetly at Yzak, who simply muttered an incoherent denial of his worry.

Lacus took her seat next to Kira, picking up the book she was reading and placing it on her lap. "We are almost there. Maybe you are feeling dizzy and that's all."

Kari nodded. "Perhaps." With that she leaned her head on Yzak's chest and closed her eyes, her hair falling over her forehead like that of a child. Kira watched the Duel pilot brush it back behind her ear as if out of habit.

Indeed, it was very strange. A wolf and a rabbit... Yzak and Kari...

Lacus distracted him from his examination of the amusingly mismatched yet oddly cute couple.

"Are you sure it's all right for me to come over? Isn't it a bit embarrassing to spend the night there?" the songstress asked as she picked at the sleeve of his shirt lovingly, then Kira watched as her hand traveled from his shoulder to his hand, fingering the thin silver band on his ring finger shyly.

Kira grinned down at her. He had informed his parents a week ago, when they had received the invitation from Cagalli, and they were actually excited. His father told him last night that his mother had been in the guestroom all week, preparing it for Lacus. "They wouldn't have it any other way. Does it bother you that we'll be staying in one house?"

She blushed a bit, then shook her head. "Not at all. It's just that I don't want to be a bother."

The brown-haired boy knocked his forehead against hers. "And since when are you a bother?"

She giggled. "I am always a bother."

Kira found himself once again smiling idiotically as he always did when Lacus giggled. He loved to listen to her laughing and watch her innocently look back at him with those eyes. For the millionth time that week, he asked himself how such a tough and strong girl who led people to victory in the war could be so... alluringly child-like. She had the simplest of desires, simplest of wants. A book can make her smile, and a kiss can make her giggle. It was so easy to make her happy...

And now, as he looked at her playing with the ring on his finger, the ring that she herself had given, he could not help but wonder how he could have been so stupid.

_I kept on telling myself that I had been unlucky, that I had been the greater victim of this war... But in reality I knew nothing. Lacus, Cagalli, Athrun... You lost more than I did, yet you were all very strong... You've lost fathers and mothers alike, when I still have my parents with me... I am stupid, and very selfish... _

"What are you staring at?"

Kira blinked in surprise and laughed gently as he saw Lacus staring back at him with those wide, innocent eyes. He rested his forehead on her temple, brushing the side of her face with a finger of his free hand. "What else it there worth looking at? Of course, you..."

She hid her face shyly.

A book can make her smile, and a kiss can make her laugh. Almost anything can make her blush, pretty much as she did now.

_**0 - 0 - 0 - 0**_

Of course, Cagalli couldn't have expected any less of Miriaillia. Maybe it was because she too was having suspicions on how the girl could possibly man-handle Dearka the way she does.

"The father was a Coordinator?" Milly asked her as they made their way across the front lawn to the kitchen where they had suspicions Fallon had scuttled away to while they weren't looking.

The Princess of Orb nodded her head, brushing back the long bangs that had fallen into her hazel eyes. "At least that's what Murrue said. For someone who hates Coordinators so badly, one wouldn't expect she was one, herself."

With this, Milly's index finger flew to her chin in thought. "Actually, it might prove to make more sense."

"How so?"

Milly turned to her, eyes closing slightly as she smiled. "Fallon doesn't seem to understand the gravity of the situation between Coordinators and Naturals, Cagalli. As far as I can tell, she doesn't give Athrun a hard time for being one, but raises hell with Dearka. Don't you think so?"

This made Cagalli bite her lip, somewhat perplexed. "Actually, no one can miss that fact. but then again, she is a kid. What else can we expect from her?"

"Well for starters, I seriously think her hatred for Coordinators is purely personal. And now that you've mentioned something about her father being one, I seem to finally get her. She's not mad at Coordinators because of the war. She's mad at Coordinators because her father was one."

This was something that she herself had thought about, but it mattered little to her. She did not care about the little girl's past. Just that she was making life pretty hard for everyone right now. She was not feeling optimistic about her coming with them to Japan either, but it seemed like it was the only place she can go to.

Shrugging her shoulders in an attempt to relax her aching muscles, she looked up at the window where Athrun was and narrowed her eyes when she saw him with his back to the window, as if he was talking to someone.

Another problem she had to deal with. She did not like it when he did not tell her everything. She knew that he loved to suffer silently, as he always did out of selflessness. He was so Athrun that way, but in a way, it had always offended her. Prying her eyes away from the window, she led the way into the kitchen and frowned when they discovered Fallon was not there.

"Where the heck did she sneak of to?" she muttered as Milly hurried to the living room. After a moment, her head popped back out.

"Over here," Milly said in a whisper, motioning for her to follow before disappearing once again into the living room.

Cagalli groaned inwardly. Another thing she really did not feel like doing; anxiously trying to understand a disturbed child... If it had not been for Milly's insistence on letting the troublemaker run free within the grounds, she would really have had her locked up in a room. She was like this little rat that managed to get itself into tiny holes it couldn't get itself out of.

Dragging her feet on the floor, she entered the living room and was surprised to see a worried Miriallia kneeling on the floor in front of a curled-up Fallon on the couch, her dirty-blonde head of hair between her knees, face completely unseen under her mop of unruly locks.

A tingle of anxiety nagged at Cagalli's gut at the sight of this hyper little creature curled up into such a defenseless position. "Is she all right?"

Miriallia shook her head, her eyes not leaving the girl in front of her. "I don't know. She's just there, and she won't even look up at me..."

Approaching with a bit of caution, the princess kneeled beside Milly and peered at the girl. "Fallon? What's wrong?"

Milly's eyes met hers before turning away again and touching Fallon's shoulder. "Does something hurt? Talk to me, Fallon."

And with that, much to Cagalli's surprise, the girl raised her face to meet Milly's, eyes wide as saucers, her lips trembling evidently.

"My... head... " was the only thing she stammered out before gasping and throwing her arms over her head in a hurry. "Go... away..."

"Does it hurt?" Cagalli asked, standing up, ready to call for Athrun for assistance.

But Fallon shook her head. "No... My head... someone... in my head... "

Cagalli frowned and turned around, finally deciding to get Athrun, but was pleasantly surprised to find him already descending the stairs, looking like he had been abducted by pod people. "Athrun, I was about to call you."

The Justice pilot snapped out of his reverie and blinked a couple of times before finally realizing Cagalli had addressed him. "Is everything all right?" he asked as he joined the two girls who were worriedly hovering over the curled up Fallon.

For some weird reason, Cagalli was suddenly not very optimistic about that day. She watched as Athrun jumped in worriedly, expertly knowing the first thing to do, immediately snapping orders for her and Milly to do about the situation.

Relieved, Cagalli hurried off to comply. There were just too many things to do, and in less than an hour, Kira and the rest were arriving. This was not turning out to be a good day.

_**0 - 0 - 0 - 0**_

The last time Yzak had ever been to Orb was when they did a reconnaissance mission on it in search for the Archangel. He had been with Nicol, Athrun and Dearka then. One thing that he took note of it then that was still there until now; it was so peaceful.

As he disembarked the plane with Kari clutching his arm tightly, he felt himself relaxing a bit as a gust of wind blew from the mountains in the north, playing with his hair and collar. Kira and Lacus pushed past them when he saw a screaming Cagalli dart out of a sleek black limousine parked in the dry-docks, followed by an equally excited Miriallia. A very troubled-looking Athrun slipped out of the vehicle soon after, and Dearka whispering something in his ear worriedly. Yzak watched in amusement as Cagalli leaped the last steps up the ramp and tackled Kira to the ground with a loud yelp. The twins fell to the ground with a loud grunt from the Freedom pilot.

"It's nice to see you too, Cagalli," Kira laughed as he pushed the hyper princess up and got to his feet, brushing his bottom before planting a kiss on Cagalli's cheek. "You've gotten thinner. Are you sure you're eating well?"

The princess laughed weakly. Yzak could not help but realize that Kira was right. Cagalli looked thinner then. She must be under a lot of stress lately. "I'm okay. Tired, but otherwise fine." She turned to Lacus immediately, then gave her a tight hug, which the songstress returned affectionately.

"How are you, Cagalli? I hope you aren't overworking yourself," said the pink-haired girl.

"Nonsense. You're the one I'm worried about." The princess elbowed Kira in the ribs. "My little brother isn't giving you a hard time, is he?"

Lacus giggled. "I wouldn't know what to do without him."

The small talk continued and Yzak turned to Kari, who was as usual quiet as everyone else voiced out their thoughts. He watched her silently as she knuckled her temple gently and was about to lean forward to whisper something in her ear when suddenly someone grabbed him around the neck in a tight choke hold, cutting out any coherent thought as anger bubbled up at his throat.

"I knew it! You really did have the hots for Kari! Who da man? You da man!" Dearka hooted as he ruffled his hair messily. Yzak felt all the blood go to his head in outrage.

"Elthman, let me go or I will beat the ever-loving crap out of your friggin' face!" he demanded, struggling out of his vise-like grip.

Dearka did let him go, but not because he took the threat seriously. It was because he wanted to see his face redden up at his declaration that he knew that Yzak and Kari were going out. "Man, look at you! I've never seen you look so good! You've gained a bit of weight. You've not all scrawny and your face doesn't have that hollow dead look it usually has." The annoying Buster pilot turned to Kari, making the girl back away from him a step, an amused look in her eyes. "You are taking good care of him, aren't you? Ah man, Ezaria will be pleased."

Yzak, at the sound of his mother's name, straightened and let Kari deal with Dearka for the while. He spotted Athrun safely behind Milly and Cagalli as they badgered Kira about how he got Lacus to forgive him. Slipping swiftly between the girls, he grabbed Athrun by the arm and asked in a hushed whisper, "Is my mother really coming?"

The Justice pilot blinked a few times, as if he had just snapped out of a trance, then he nodded. "Yes, she's actually expected to be here in half an hour that's why Cagalli reserved some rooms in the hotels in downtown Kaguya for an early lunch. We will be waiting for her before taking her to the Memorial venue, right after we take the representatives to their accommodations."

"Is she the only representative?"

"Unfortunately, yes. But at least that is better than no representative from PLANT at all."

Yzak nodded. He cared less about the representatives. But he had been so anxious in seeing his mother again. How long has it been? And their parting of ways weren't exactly the best of farewells. He was such a disobedient son. Another thing, too, was that he wanted to introduce Kari to her. His mother will truly be pleased. She had always hoped for Yzak to find a calm, sweet girl to balance out his temper.

_Yes, Kari will please her..._

At the thought, he found himself grinning idiotically and stopped when Athrun started to look at him weird. Clearing his throat, he straightened the collar of his shirt then looked around his surroundings. No sooner did it draw in on him that everything was finally reconstructed. This place had been a battleground from what he heard of it then. Dearka was the one to know. He had been in the battle that took place here not too long ago. "Cagalli's done a good job of things here. Everything seems to be in order."

Athrun followed his gaze with a small smile playing on his lips. "I'll have to agree. She's been working harder than usual. I can't wait for tomorrow when we'd be going back to Abashiri." He wiped his palm on one of his pant leg absent-mindedly. "That way, she can stop growing old too fast."

Yzak could only grunt as he watched Cagalli turn to Lacus again with a smile that seemed too forced on her face. "You're not worrying her too much, are you?" For some reason, he did not like for Cagalli to be that worried. He had really grown quite fond of the princess.

Athrun blinked in somewhat of a surprise. He shook his head vigorously. "Of course not. I try to help her out as much as I can."

Yzak knew Athrun. They had graduated from Military school at the same time, and he had spent majority of his time trying to bring the fellow down in competition. From all the experience of dealing with the top gun ZAFT soldier, Yzak knew when something was bothering him, even when he didn't necessarily care. "I'm not doubting you helping her around. But sometimes, there are other things that need the extra attention. You don't look like yourself lately."

The incredulity in Athrun's dark eyes was evident. "What makes you say that?"

Athrun couldn't lie himself out of a paper bag. That was how he really is. Yzak snorted and turned back to Kari, who was pleasantly laughing at something Dearka was saying. Immediately alarmed of what dirt the Buster pilot was feeding his girlfriend, he shoved Athrun aside and hurried to Kari.

With this, Dearka placed an index finger on his lips and smiled secretively. "Don't tell okay?"

Yzak scowled at him. "Don't tell who what?"

Dearka sneered and went to his rightful place beside Milly, who was busy weaseling questions about Kira still, pretending as if he didn't hear anything.

The Duel pilot suspiciously faced Kari. "Okay, what did he say?"

This amused the girl to no end. "Nothing."

Yzak gritted his teeth in annoyance. He will not beg for her to tell him what was it about. Sighing and trying to regain composure, he let Kari slip her arm through his to once again let her play with his arm hairs. "Are you ready to meet my mother today?"

Kari nodded serenely. "I can't wait. I am sure she is a very nice woman."

There was no doubt to that. He just hoped his mother liked Kari as much. He did not think his heart could take it if the two women in his life did not get along at all.

_**0 - 0 - 0 - 0**_

Miriallia frowned as she walked along the empty corridors of the main building reserved for the offices of the houses of Orb. This was also where the chairman would hold office for the time being, but given that Cagalli was going away tomorrow, there really was no room reserved for the princess. The corridors were wide yet they seemed to hold a warm mood, what with wood lining the walls and red carpets were well set on the floor, cushioning Miriallia's steps as she walked up and down in search for the girl that had been giving her and Dearka a headache for the past week.

"Found her yet?" asked a voice from behind her as she closed one of the doors to her left. It was Dearka.

She shook her head. "I know I asked her to stay here... But it seems like she's wandered off." What else was new? Fallon loved to sneak around. It was a miracle she hadn't tried to run away.

He could only shake his head as he placed a hand on her waist to lead her down the hall. "We don't have time for this. Ezaria's shuttle just came in and the representatives from the EA have started to pile in the Square. We have to go and help Cagalli usher them downtown in those limousines Kisaka had provided. It looks like the memorial will be earlier than expected. Too many guests getting really worked out."

Miriallia gasped. This was terrible! They were still lacking manpower... "What? Now? But Kazui and Sai aren't here yet. And the flowers! We haven't distributed the paper flowers yet!"

There were so many things that had to be done for today. Why was everyone piling in so early?

The program Murrue and Erika had prepared as approved by Cagalli was a very simple one, yet with all the people coming in from all over the world, the crowd control was very hard to maintain. They didn't know where to stuff all the representatives coming in from the docks, and it looked like many more are coming. The escort vehicles looked like they were not going to be sufficient enough...

Dearka shrugged helplessly. "We can't look for Fallon all day. Another more person missing is Athrun."

Milly blinked. "Athrun is missing?"

"Yes. Cagalli has been frantic and is torn between searching for him and welcoming everyone who's docking."

It did not seem like Athrun to leave Cagalli hanging at such an important event. "When did you notice he was missing?"

"Right after he met with Ezaria." Dearka frowned himself, then stirred them to a hall that was probably the busiest on the floor where the paper flowers were. About a dozen people were running in and out of an obviously fairly crowded room. "He first stopped to greet me right after Ezaria spotted Yzak with Kari. Then he asked me to assist Cagalli for the while then was off. That was about an hour ago. We never saw him since. I was hoping you've stumbled upon him..."

She shook her head, then suddenly remembered something. "I did see him sneaking in the AV room earlier, but I've been busy helping Reverend Malchio before I discovered Fallon was missing. I didn't know he was going to go into hiding... If there is anyone who should find him, it should be Cagalli."

"Who should be Cagalli?"

Miriallia turned around and gasped as a very disoriented princess of Orb staggered out of nowhere, hair sticking out everywhere, hands wiping at her skirt that was hiking up her leg probably from running. "Cagalli? What happened to you? Don't tell me you are welcoming representatives looking like that?"

She brushed the comment as if brushing aside a fly. "I left Kisaka for the while."

Dearka was amused. "He let you run off?"

This made Cagalli grin. "I deliberately tried to look like this enough to make him drive me off to look more decent." Then she leaned forward expectantly. "Have you seen Athrun?"

Milly looked at Dearka, who looked back at her. She turned back to Cagalli. "I saw him in the AV room earlier. Maybe he's still there?"

This made Cagalli's face brighten. "I swear that boy is going to get it. To think he's going to be playing later in the memorial for Lacus' song!" She was about to run off again, when Dearka's hand shot out and grabbed her arm, making her stop and look back at him questioningly.

The Buster pilot looked a bit flustered before sighing silently. "Cagalli, about Athrun... "

The princess nodded encouragingly. "Yeah?"

A girl carrying a bouquet of those paper flowers Miriallia did not know passed by them after muttering a shy 'excuse me', and Dearka grabbed a single flower, handing it to Cagalli.

Cagalli stared at it questioningly, but took the flower anyway, twirling it around her fingers. "Huh?"

Dearka scratched his head. "Just take it. You will understand what I mean when you see him."

"Who? Athrun?"

Slightly irritated, Dearka nodded then herded her along. "Just go. Find him."

Feeling a bit lost, Miriallia turned to Dearka right after she bid Cagalli later. "What's that about?"

Her boyfriend simply smiled weakly then squeezed her shoulder affectionately. "Athrun needs a flower. He needs it terribly."

Miriallia shook her head a bit. Men were weird. Too bad he didn't have the time to think about it. She sniffed at Dearka playfully before going into the room to grab a bouquet of paper flowers. She should start distributing flowers now, whether or not Kazui and Sai were coming. And what with Lacus warming up for her part in the program, Yzak and Kari accommodating the lone PLANT representative and Kira off to see his parents before everything else, she and Dearka were the only hands available for Kisaka's disposal, aside from the other volunteers.

She might as well start moving and worry about Fallon later.

_**0 - 0 - 0 - 0**_

He did not know why Ezaria had to give this to him, but whatever the reason, he did not know if he'd accept it. Looking down at the small leather-bound book clasped in between his fingers, along with a small disc he had never seen before, he found himself making his way across the muffled AV room as if in a trance. Looking around him to make sure he was alone, he switched on the lone overhead projector, illuminating the empty and dark room with hazy white light. Clumsily inserting the disc in the OHP, dreading whatever he was going to see in it, he found himself making his way to the nearest seat and dropping down like a rock.

As if hypnotized, the Justice pilot's eyes widened as the first image appeared on the white surface where the light projected itself. He had to remind himself to breathe at the sight of a very familiar face...

There, in the projection, was a very nervous, young-looking Patrick Zala, holding a sleeping, dark-haired baby...

"_He... he's so tiny... dear, take him back... I might hurt him..." _Patrick said in a wavering voice as he awkwardly turned to the camera, sweat popping out of his forehead as he laughed nervously.

"_Nonsense, dear," _said a melodious voice from somewhere. And Athrun's heart stopped beating. It was the voice of his mother... _"Look at you. All excited at being a daddy..."_

_Oh, dear Lord..._

Patrick laughed again. _"No, really dear. Take him back. I might drop him... or squeeze him... or..."_

Another chorus of laughter from his mother, then he watched the camera angle shift, and came a sight that made Athrun choke back some undesirable feeling rising up his throat. His mother... his beautiful, lovely mother came into view, and took the baby in her arms. _"Relax Patrick... a parent can never hurt his child on purpose... I'm sure you will never let little Athrun get hurt..."_

_Oh God..._

"_One can never be too sure, now can he?" _replied the man as he finally relaxed as the burden of the baby out of his arms. But there was no doubt in his face as he looked down at the baby, all the love found in those gentle lines marring his face as he smiled down at it, the glossiness of his eyes as he looked at his wife... Patrick Zala... he actually looked... gentle then...

_Oh... God... _

"_One day, he will grow up and be just like his father... "_ his mother said as she rocked the baby Athrun in her arms as if holding precious glass. _"Wouldn't that be such a wonderful thought, dear? He will be great, just like you..."_

Athrun watched in anticipation at the reaction of his father, and found that his heart which had stopped then, was now beating a mile a minute. The pain throbbed at his chest and head as he saw his father frown at his wife, then shook his head. _"I pray that that would not be so..."_

"_Oh, come now. He will be as great as you..."_

"_No, dear... no..."_

Athrun bit down on his lips and closed his eyes as he felt tears tickle at his nose dangerously. He could not watch anymore but he could not get himself not to listen...

"_He will be much greater than I. I have made mistakes, and I will never be able to stop making them, because I am who I am. But Athrun... will be greater than I... May fortune smile down on him, and let him grow to be unlike me..."_

Forcing his eyes to open quickly, he flipped through the contents of the book Ezaria had given him, and gasped as he saw filed photographs of him and his father, some he could remember, some he had already forgotten. But all felt like thorns thrust into his heart.

_What happened to us, Father?_

Athrun looked up when he saw something wet heavily drop down on the photo of him riding on a bicycle, with his father holding onto his seat to make sure he didn't fall over. Whatever did happen to them? Whatever it was, he was starting to cry. He had to stop. He did not want to cry for his father...

Another tear fell on the photograph. He wiped at his face roughly, somehow mad at himself. But when he looked back down at the book in his hand, he gasped in surprise when he saw a single paper flower on the book.

"A flower for your father, Athrun Zala."

Athrun was on his feet immediately, clasping the book in one hand and the flower in another. He found himself staring at wide, amber eyes looking at him. They were such beautiful eyes, even when they were crying... Or perhaps that is why they were beautiful... Those eyes were crying now… "Cagalli..."

Athrun looked down at the flower in his hand then shook his head. "He doesn't deserve this... "

"Why?"

"Because he has done so many wrong things..."

He looked back up when he felt a warm hand touching his cheek gently. He saw a lone tear trickle down his Cagalli's cheek. Tired, hollow cheeks... She was most definitely too thin... But still beautiful... "What can I say? All the good things he's done outweigh the bad..."

He almost looked away, but Cagalli touched his other cheek with her other hand, making him look at her intently. "I don't see anything good he's done..."

Cagalli smiled. "I do..."

"What?"

"You..." and without another word, Cagalli pulled him into one of those tight embraces, slipping one of her arms around his waist while her other hand ran through his hair, pushing his head near her neck. "Grieve Athrun, grieve. No one will call stop you from loving your father. None of us can understand. Only you can. So here is a flower... to honor the man that was your father, and not as that man you keep on seeing him as."

And for all it was worth, all the pain, the grief, the sadness, crashed down on him so heavily that it overwhelmed him. The tears came one at a time, then eventually flowed like a river of emotions down his face. And Cagalli, for once, kept quiet, silently listening to what he was not saying as he poured everything out of his heavy heart... draining his soul of angry and bitter tears as he sobbed in his Cagalli's arms.

Crying... grieving... Yes, he never gave himself the opportunity to do so... Yes, grieving would be a good idea...

And he cried an ocean, and Cagalli silently wept with him...

_Yes... grieving is good... _

_**0 - 0 - 0 - 0**_

_**Yuugiri: Ah, what is this? An update? Ah, a miracle! Finally got one out. Been really very disappointed about many things lately. Very stressful. But for the first time I am actually annoyed at an email I have received, "demanding" that I be "considerate" of the readers and update SOON. (grumbles) Ah yes, well, in all honesty I would love to update every week, and maybe I could do this, if I didn't have a life. Fortunately for me, I DO have a life other than Fanfiction... Now this email would have normally pissed me off, had it not been for the very supportive emails I've received. (happy again) and the reviews of course, from understanding reviewers from this story and the little ficlets I wrote along with them. So yes I am very, very much compensated, regardless of this email that seems to think I will be doing fanfiction for a living and that he/she is paying me to do so... (frowns) But must not be bothered! (smiles again)**_

_**Truly, to those who have waited for the update with patience, here it is. Sorry for the delay. Thank you for those who have reviewed this story and my other stories. I have pretty much experienced everything such as being tackled last Valentines day (which really cheered me up then!), being a human target and having being given food. All of these cute reviews cheer me up, they really do. It reminds me that fanfiction is not a chore, but a medium of fun. (hands you all cookies)**_

**_Another note, some readers are giving their guesses on Kari's true identity, and I am very pleasantly surprised to know that some are coming real close to it. But here is a clue: Kari has absolutely nothing to do with Fllay. The red hair and the eyes are mere coincidences. If you are thinking about it, you can scratch that out from the equation. She has no connection to Fllay at all. _**

_**Also, some have asked of the whereabouts of Yalin. LOL! Do not worry! He is not forgotten. He will be playing quite a role sometime in the very near future. Kian, too. I just had to say it, as the appearance won't be until after a few more chapters. ,**_

_**Ah yes, and now to promote something. I have created a website, "Cookies Anyone?" I have posted some sketches of the Insatiable Heart there, some OC's (Karina Takano, Kian Takano, more under way) included. I am barely learning Adobe Photoshop, so some of them you might find a bit crappy... You can find them in the gallery. A simple request though, when you visit, please sign my guestbook so I might know what you think. Do not bother with the emailing, because that is a very inconvenient thing to use which I will be removing soon enough. You may access this site through my profile. Just click on the homepage and there you will go! Yay! **_

**_Ah so once again, thank you. Pardon the chapter, as it is a bit slow. I will try to make it better on the next update. I just had to put this one on. The problem I find with the AthrunCagalli pairings, you see, is that it is so hard to find a conflict for them… They are just too perfect… , _**

_**Ja!**_


	29. Phase 29: Take A Breather

_**Yuugiri: All right. Let's take a short break from the story line. Just this one chapter, and we'll go back to where we left off in the plot. LOL!**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed.**_

_**0 0 0 0**_

_**July 31, AW **_

The memorial ended in silent serenity with thousands upon thousands of paper flowers cast away into the western shores of Kaguya. It had been a smoldering mid-morning cooled only by the sea breeze as well as Athrun's wonderful rendition of Dawn's Carriage while Lacus sang, right after Reverend Malchio's sermon. All throughout the ceremony, Kari had forgotten of the slight ringing inside her head. But now that everything was over, the ringing was, if anything, louder and quite unbearable. She tried to hide it from everyone, especially from Yzak himself, as the boy seemed to worry too much about her since the Carnival fiasco.

Today had been such a hectic day. Yzak didn't need her to add to it. The presence of Ezaria Jule was more than enough to make him edgy.

She was a petite woman, about a hand and a half shorter than her son, with silvery-blue hair that curled over her shoulders. She looked like she was born into that crisp uniform she was wearing, her beautiful face as hard as a rock as she looked up from something she was reading when Yzak and Kari walked into her reserved sleeping quarters about half an hour after the memorial.

Kari was pleasantly surprised when the woman's icy features were broken by a warm, almost eager smile. She however, did not move from her spot on the couch. Instead, she gestured to the loveseats sitting in front of her.

"Welcome," was all she said, in a rich deep voice that suited her hard facial features.

Kari felt Yzak stiffen a bit, and for the first time that day, the light-haired boyfriend of hers looked terribly uneasy. It was as if he was unsure of what to do.

Ezaria seemed to have noticed this too, and the woman was immediately on her feet. "At ease, Yzak."

Kari's eyebrows climbed her forehead at the odd greeting, and she gazed at Yzak in the corner of her eye, seeing the boy relax evidently, and feeling his hand rest gently on her waist as if to usher her forward.

Kari had met the mother of her boyfriend earlier in the day, but none got the chance to say anything more than a word of acknowledgement to each other, as Ezaria was immediately bustled by Kisaka and Erika to talk about more important things. The older woman had struck Kari as all business, but now, seeing Yzak hurry to her side after guiding Kari to a chair, she couldn't think of it possible. Yzak actually looked... relieved to see her, and she him. Something she did not expect from this rock of a man.

"Mother, how was your trip?" Yzak asked as he kissed his mother on the cheek, then guided her in sitting down.

Kari herself took her seat in front of the woman that now brushed Yzak away while keeping her intense blue eyes on her.

_She is checking me out, _she thought, amused. Smiling at Yzak's mother, she bowed slightly. "Hello."

Yzak blinked a few times before settling next to her and putting a hand on her knee instinctively, as if he worried what his mother was going to say. Kari was not worried. Like Yzak, Ezaria was easy to read. She was obviously cautious, but evidently pleased to see her.

"What a lovely young lady you are, Kari," the woman said silently in her deep voice as she leaned back and crossed her arms over her chest casually. "I have heard so much about you from Yzak."

The last comment made Kari sit up straighter, startled. She had no idea Yzak talked about her to anyone, more so his mother. "As I have heard of you, Mrs. Jule. Yzak speaks fondly of you often."

This made the woman chuckle a bit. "He does, now does he? He has always been a talkative young lad, for someone who pretends to be all cocky. I hope he is not giving you any trouble about anything?"

"Mother!" Yzak hissed under his breath as he lowered his chin to his chest, embarrassed.

Kari felt her eyes widen at the revelation that Ezaria knows her son so well. "He never gives me anything but a reason to wake up the next day, Mrs. Jule. He is a wonderful person."

This comment seemed to have embarrassed Yzak even more and she felt his hand clench her knee tightly. He was always easy to embarrass. Ezaria, however, looked very, very happy at what she just said. "Really, child? How wonderful. It has always worried me that he will not find anyone he'd like to go out with. He had always scared majority of the girls up in the PLANTs. I was surprised when he told me that he is seeing someone. And partially afraid that he had picked someone that would not understand him. I am glad that he found you."

"_Mother!_" another hiss from Yzak.

Kari laughed. "Oh, he did not find me." She smiled up at Yzak, who was terribly pale in the face. "I found him. To tell you honestly, he could not wait to get away from me then."

This made Ezaria chuckle even more, covering her mouth with a dainty hand. "Silly child! How could anyone not like you?" With this, she turned to Yzak. "For a Natural, she sure is witty." She hurried to back up her comment. "Now don't get me wrong, Kari. I mean no offense."

This made her smile sweetly. Of course, Yzak had warned her of how his mother could be at times, but in all honesty, Kari could not see why Yzak worried too much. She was such a sincere lady. "None taken. How was your trip from the PLANTs?"

Of course the usual chitchat between her and Yzak's mother revolved mainly on politics, which seemed to impress Ezaria to no end. Kari explained that she had been reading up as her thesis required her. Yzak had remained silent majority of the time, once in a while standing to look around the room, as his mother seemed to have forgotten he was there. Kari had assumed it was because he was not worried of anything Ezaria was going to say, since the conversation didn't have anything to do with him.

The conversation swerved from politics to a more personal topic, and as soon as Yzak heard of the sudden shift, he immediately darted from the open window overlooking the busy streets of Kaguya to his seat next to Kari.

Ezaria brought about the topic about Yzak's historical love pursuits. Or at least his attempt at such.

The light-haired lady lazily looked over her nails as if they were the most interesting things in the world. "The problem I've always had with Yzak, you see, is that he had always been a walking contradiction. You would not understand if he was the strong silent type, because he wanted to project an aura of authority by being quiet, and at the same time he had too many things to say especially when his temper gets the best of him. Perhaps this is why he never got to be that successful when it came to girls. Dearka on the other hand was an expert on the category." Slightly distracted, she blinked. "How is Dearka by the way? I remember you mentioning him being taken with a Natural girl, too."

Yzak, who looked positively dead, nodded faintly. Kari squeezed his forearm gently, making him look at her and look like he wanted to throw up. "Yes... He is very seriously in love with a Natural girl."

"I could tell. He never even said goodbye to me before leaving the memorial grounds."

"I remember him telling me that Sundays are reserved for Family day in the Haww Residence."

"Really now?"

Yzak nodded. "He said they are playing Monopoly... Whatever the heck that is."

Kari felt a giggle bubbling up her throat at the apparent puzzlement in Yzak's face. Ah, yes. After the memorial, everyone had gone on their separate ways, each with his or her own excuse.

It actually had been fun to see the gang break up into pairs after the memorial. Kira and Lacus had gone off to the Yamato residence to get ready for a little excursion up the mountains after much coaxing from Cagalli. The princess had been over-eager to get Kira to take the Songstress to these hot springs in the North. Of course, as always, Lacus had been eager as well. She was always easy to please.

Athrun and Cagalli, on the other hand, had their own plans for that evening consisting of a blanket and a basket of goodies under the stars next to the sea. Kari heard of Cagalli say that they had been planning on it for days already.

Of course, as Yzak had mentioned earlier, Dearka and Miriallia were booked the whole evening for a competitive game of Monopoly with Milly's parents.

And then there was she and Yzak to spend some quality time with the woman he had been nervous about ever since he found out she was coming.

Kari blinked her eyes repeatedly as she felt the ringing in her head make her temple throb uncomfortably. She ignored it when she saw Yzak once again cast her a worried look. She gave him a reassuring smile and plucked at the small hairs on his arm. The gesture always did have a calming effect on the Duel pilot. He nodded at her and turned to his mother.

"Will you be returning to PLANT soon?"

Ezaria narrowed her eyes at him. "I just got here. If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were trying to get rid of me." Kari laughed at her comment, but Yzak took it dead seriously. He paled instantly, and then shook his head. "Of course not!"

Ezaria grinned crookedly. "We will talk later about the PLANTs when Kari is not here. Right now, I wish to talk about more personal matters. Now tell me. When can I see your parents, child?"

Yzak's mouth worked wordlessly as he leaned forward to protest. But Ezaria raised a finger at him in warning. Yzak completely ignored her. "Mother, don't do this please. We've hardly been going out for a few weeks - "

"Yzak, with the rate you are going with the game of hearts, I will be ninety before I see my first grandchild. I wish to get the chance to spoil her for a few years before I die," Ezaria said seriously.

Kari's eyes darted from her to Yzak.

The Duel pilot was outraged. "Mother, don't talk that way! You – " he stopped dead in the middle of the sentence he was saying, then it was his turn to narrow his eyes. "Wait a minute. What makes you think my first child would be a she?"

Kari covered her mouth with her hand when she was a slight blush rise to Yzak's cheeks.

Ezaria smiled smugly. "Of course it will be a girl! For Kari's sake. Fortune be kind on her. Only the heavens know how much I've endured trying to raise you... "

Yzak's face turned a deeper shade of red, then blue. "Now that is uncalled for…!"

Ezaria's eyes blazed. "Do not forget yourself, Yzak. I have waited for this moment since you started to shave. I won't be staying long here on Earth as Tad Elthman cannot keep everything in order at the rate things are going up there. So I wish to make sure that when I do get things organized there, I would be able to schedule a meeting with Kari's family. Now one more word out of you when I am not asking you to talk, and it's the corner for you, do you hear Yzak?" she huffed, then muttered a few words Kari barely heard, but was sure it was about boys from the military not knowing discipline at all.

Yzak, however, was white with silent fury. Kari squeezed his clenched fist and he relaxed a bit. Just a bit.

This seemed to satisfy Ezaria Jule. "Good." She turned to Kari as if Yzak were just one of those throw pillows on the love seat. "Now tell me. When would it be more convenient for you to get married?"

Kari choked back a gasp. "Excuse me?" For the first time since she had met her, she actually felt like blushing.

This, apparently, was the last straw for Yzak. With a loud roar, he catapulted onto his feet, arms stiffly shaking on either side of him, face once again red. "I told you mother! We haven't been going out that long to even think anything about that!"

Ezaria stared at him with a deadpanned expression. "Yzak?"

"_What?_" the Duel pilot snapped.

"Corner."

Yzak's jaw dropped. "Aw, mother. You can't be serious – "

"Corner. Move. Now."

Kari stared at Yzak in pure amusement. It was quite hard to define the mother-son relationship at this moment, as it looked like Yzak was obeying a superior the way he wilted evidently and grumbled an incoherent _'all right'_ as he dragged his feet towards the corner next to a bulky shelf containing a number of glass objects. All the way from there, Kari could see him glower at his mother in disbelief.

Ezaria twirled a finger casually. "Face the wall, Yzak."

Kari watched as Yzak grudgingly obeyed. She could see his shoulders stiffen under his coat, his silvery-blue hair hiding the sides of his face from view. But Kari knew that he was still fuming.

For a brief moment there, she almost forgot about the throbbing in her head. She touched her head briefly. _What is this anyway?_

Ezaria pulled her back to reality. "Now, about the meeting?"

She forced a smile. She will have to worry about it some other time, this headache. She could totally see why Yzak loved her. She was such an endearing lady. Kari struck her as a person who took look life too seriously.

She loved her already.

_**0 0 0 0**_

Looking up, the Freedom pilot was instantly captivated by a vision in the middle of his parent's lawn. It was the weirdest sight Kira had ever beheld in his life. There, standing on the other side of his father's red convertible, armed with a small sponge in one hand and a squeegee in another, was Lacus. Clad in one of his old black tee-shirts too big for her and a pair of knee-length shorts and sneakers, the songstress looked positively beautiful. Standing there with an eager expression on her usually eager face, she smiled at him sweetly.

"So where do we begin?" she asked, squeezing the sponge a few times after tilting her head to the right inquiringly.

"Well, there isn't any specific place to begin, really." Kira clenched and unclenched his hands after lathering a bit of cleaning solution in the large bucket sitting next to him. "You have your sponge?"

She waved the absorbent thing happily. "Yes, sir." She hurried to his side and wordlessly dunked it into the bucket of bubbly water. "May I begin?"

Kira had to laugh. "You may do the honors, Miss Clyne."

Now in all honesty, Kira couldn't find any other thing he'd want to do right now than clean his father's car with Lacus, who seemed to be sharing the same sentiments. With the sun casting a wonderful orange hue on the neighborhood, and a gentle breeze blowing in from the mountains, it was a peaceful afternoon to prepare for their excursion later that day. Cagalli had been awfully pushy about it, and so he couldn't help but agree with her to take Lacus to the mountains where his twin had been bragging about Hot Springs.

Not that he needed a lot of coaxing. He would love to be alone with Lacus here in Orb.

"So when will your parents come back?" Lacus asked as she squeezed the sponge before scrubbing it against the roof of the car.

Haruma and Caridad Yamato had been dragged away by Kisaka soon after the memorial had finished. The man had insisted that they have coffee together, but Kira knew that it had something to do with matters of great consequence. Grown ups always do tend to discuss too much of matters of consequence.

"They didn't exactly tell me, but my mom said that they will be back to see us off to our little trip." At the remembrance that the will be going out with just the two of them, Kira smiled crookedly.

Lacus brushed back her long hair over her shoulder and giggled. "I am excited. I have never been to a hot spring before."

"Neither have I."

This made the Songstress tilt her head to the side once more. "Oh, how wonderful! We get to experience something for the first time together."

The statement made Kira's smile widen. It was true. Although he had been adding a lot to that long list of firsts he and Lacus were having, it seemed like this was going to be the first time they were gonna be doing something in which both of them are unfamiliar with. He let his eyes travel to Lacus' face as her forehead scrunched up in the process of trying to scrub a small spot of dirt on the windshield. He bit his lower lip and grabbed his own sponge from the hood of the car. Hmm. A night under the stars while soaking in hot water suddenly seemed so inviting.

After a ten minutes of scrubbing in silence, Lacus suddenly spoke.

"So I was talking to Miriallia earlier while she was helping me get dressed back stage," Lacus said, continuing her final diligent scrubbing of her side of the car.

"Really? What about?" he asked absentmindedly, raising the wipers and cleaning the glass for the second time with patience. His father loved this car. What was weird was why the heck he never found the patience to clean it himself.

"A lot of things. Her, Dearka. You, me."

Kira grinned a bit, briefly looking at her then intently sloshing more soapy water on the hood. "About you and me? What about you and me?"

She closed her eyes, a faint blush rising to her cheeks she tried to cover with her bangs. "Oh nothing important. Just you. And me. That's all."

Kira narrowed his eyes at her, but decided that Lacus will tell him anyway if it really were important. "Okay. I'll let you go with that for the while."

She shrugged her shoulders in that too large tee shirt of hers. "Oh, and by the way. Sai also went back stage with Kazui."

"Oh, really? What did they say? How are they?"

"They are fine. Both of them are attending school here in Kaguya it seems. Both their parents don't want them too far away from home. And then Kazui handed me something quite peculiar."

Kira blinked a couple of times and watched as Lacus wiped her left hand on the side of her shirt, leaving a dark, wet trail there, then dug her dried hand into the back pocket of her shorts, retrieving a small black square thing that looked awfully familiar to him.

_Dear, sweet heaven..._

Kira took a deep breath and held it in because if he didn't, he knew he was going to burst out laughing. It was the tape recorder Kazui and Sai used to record Yzak's voice while he was singing in the shower!

Lacus stared at it a few seconds, then turned to Kira. At the sight of his face, she frowned in confusion. "Are you all right? You are all red in the face."

Kira shook his head vigorously, trying to shake along with it the memory of him and Athrun listening to Yzak singing _'Can't Smile Without You'_ in a slightly off-tune voice. "I'm all right." He cleared his throat hurriedly then leaned forward a bit, momentarily distracted from his cleaning. "You didn't _listen _to it, did you?"

Lacus looked even more confused as she eyes the object suspiciously. "Err... not really. Was I supposed to?"

Kira had to control himself from snatching the thing away from her. For some weird reason, he felt like defending Yzak's pride all of a sudden, thinking that he owed him that much at least. "No, no. Err... what did Sai and Kazui say?"

Lacus shrugged again. "They said I should give it to Kari."

"Give what to Kari?" Kira almost jumped when he heard a cool female voice come from somewhere behind him.

Lacus's face broke into a bright smile. "Kari! Hi!"

Kira looked over his shoulder and was slightly surprised to see that it was, indeed, Kari. Clad in her usual loose shirt and jeans, her shoulder-length hair blowing gently in the breeze, the only thing quite out of place with her was that she was riding a bike, her slender arms resting casually on the handlebars, a satisfied expression on her flushed face.

"Hi there," she greeted, waving a bit. "Cagalli and Athrun told us where you were staying for the night. We wanted to say hello before you leave for your little trip."

Kira swallowed hard. "We?"

This word made Kari smile her small smile as she looked over to the end of the street as if waiting for something. "Yzak was right behind me a while ago. Maybe he is doing it on purpose to make me come back for him and so he will trick me and win our little race. He has been quite moody ever since his talk with his mother…"

Once again, Kira battled with himself to keep his lungs from exploding. For someone who was keen with emotions and feelings, Kari sure was very wrong with this one. Everyone knew of Yzak's apparent handicap when it came to bicycles. "You convinced Yzak to race with you _on a bike_?"

Kari nodded, not taking her eyes away from the corner she was looking at. "Well, Dearka helped me convince him. He was a bit hesitant at first, but when Dearka whispered something in his ear, he suddenly agreed."

Kira didn't want to know what Dearka said. Everything flew out the window when Lacus dropped her sponge in the bucket and approached the Duel pilot's girlfriend. "Well, I'm glad you are here. Kazui and Sai wanted you to have this for some reason."

The Freedom pilot watched as Kari reached for the tape recorder as if in slow motion. Well, so much for defending Yzak's pride. He watched as Kari flipped the object in her hand cautiously.

"Is this supposed to mean something?" Kari asked.

Lacus laughed gaily. "I have no idea." She returned to her usual place next to the car and picked up her sponge. "They just wanted me to give you that."

Kari obviously still looked puzzled, but nodded anyway. "Well, thank you. I will listen to it later." She was about to slip it into her pocket when suddenly, a blur of silver hair and flailing limbs shot out from up the street, barreling its way down the sidewalk and missing a mailbox. It was none other than Yzak on a bike.

And he did not look happy to be on it at all.

Remarkably, he was able to hit the brakes in a loud screeching halt right next to Kari.

Lacus froze in fright at the sudden entrance of the Duel pilot. "Yzak! You scared me."

Kira could only swallow once more at the sight of the light-haired Coordinator what with his hair sticking out in every direction, his face contorted into an ugly frown, his teeth bared as if he was going to bite something. He did not look happy to be on wheels at all.

Kari, as usual, retained her serene composure. "What happened?"

Yzak half-snarled his answer. "Well, when I lost you somewhere about five blocks away, I decided to take my time and walk the rest of the way. But then, as if fate wanted me to feel even more miserable than I already felt, a dog suddenly _popped _out of nowhere and _chased _me down the friggin' road. I had no choice but to ride this friggin' bike and I tore down four friggin' blocks like a madman, with the dog right behind me! I have never been so embarrassed in my whole life!"

Kira burst out laughing, but immediately cut it off when Yzak glared at him dangerously. "Sorry. Are you all right?"

The Duel pilot scoffed and was about to complain even more when Kari touched her forehead against his temple and whispered something in his ear as if it were some secret only they could understand. The effect did wonders on Yzak that Kira could not believe it. Yzak's shoulders relaxed a bit, as if Kari's voice itself caressed his very mood. For the hundredth time that week, Kira wondered how this girl did it. She can actually tame this uncontrollable beast of a man.

"So is your mother waiting for you tonight? Or will we be eating dinner together?" Kari was saying silently, but not too silent for it to escape Kira's ear.

Yzak took a deep breath and ran his hand through his hair, as if to calm himself even more. "I'm dining with you tonight."

This seemed to have surprised Kari. "Don't you think it would be better if you had dinner with your mother? She won't be staying long here on earth."

Yzak muttered an incoherent sentence that had something to do with his mother insisting he spend time with Kari and that he should treat her better. He was about to say something more when his eyes caught something clasped in Kari's hand.

_Busted..._

Yzak's face turned a few shades of red. "Kari?"

"Yes?"

"What on Earth are you holding?"

Kari looked down at her hand, then to Yzak's face. "Something Kazui and Sai gave me. Why?"

The redness vanished and was replaced by pure bliss. Kira could almost read his mind. Finally, he'd get to snatch back that horrid tape! "Kari? Give it to me. Now."

Kari blinked and slowly pulled her hand away, placing herself between Yzak and the tape recorder. "But they wanted me to have this," she said teasingly.

Kira stared at the couple with utmost awe. The two were actually _flirting _with each other! And Yzak actually looked like he was enjoying it! He laughed as Kari hopped onto her bike swiftly. It was strange. She had never struck Kari as someone who could move that fast. But right now, watching her turn to Lacus and him for a final wave before zooming down the street, leaving Yzak in a stupor, he was really impressed.

"Kari! Come back here!" Yzak hollered as he clumsily tried to hop onto his own bike, staggered a few times with the pedals, then was off to a wobbly start but was able to regain balance after a few pumps on it. Kira, in all his amusement, stared after them as the couple disappeared around the corner. Yzak looked as happy to be with Kari as he was happy with his Lacus...

"Now wasn't that so cute?" He heard Lacus say from behind him.

He turned around and nodded in agreement. "Yzak seems happy with her."

"And Kari, too." The songstress grabbed the bucket of soapy water and poured some of it on the hood. "There! All clean!"

Shoving the image of Yzak and Kari playing Tag out of his brain, he pointed over to the hose coiled not a few feet away from the pink-haired girl. "Can you get that for me?"

Lacus looked over her shoulder, and her face immediately brightened. "Oh, are you going to hose the car down?"

"Well, yes. Why? Do you wanna do it?"

She was ecstatic. "Oh, can I?"

Kira could still not get over the fact at how easily this person could be pleased. Shaking his head ruefully, he nodded. "Be my guest. Just don't turn the water up too much or – "

The words were immediately knocked out of his mouth when he was caught off-guard by the sudden wet spray right into his face. It was gone right after he heard a squeal from somewhere in front of him.

Coughing, trying to gag out the water that had entered his mouth, he felt a warm hand cupping his face on one side and no sooner were two huge blue eyes worriedly peering into him.

"Oh dear, are you all right?" she asked as she continued to look into his face as she held away the hose spouting water with her free hand. "I'm sorry. I didn't know the pressure here was that strong..."

Kira sniffed hastily, forcing out the water that had shot up his nose. At the sight of Lacus' worried face, he could not help but laugh. "It's just water, Lacus. I'm fine. Now give me the hose."

She meekly did so, gingerly handing him the hose, careful so that Kira didn't get even more wet as it is. Too bad. The Freedom pilot was not as careful. As soon as his fingers gripped the hose's snout, he immediately pressed a finger on the hole and sprayed and unsuspecting songstress at her side. She squealed loudly at the coldness of the water that soaked at her shirt, making the fabric heavier, clinging to her skin.

"Kira!" she protested, trying to make a getaway. But Kira was not naturally naughty. Unfortunately it was one of those days when he felt like goofing around.

Today had been such a good day. For the first time since Lacus had said yes, he honestly felt like there were a lot of things to look forward to... Aiming the hose at a running Lacus who tried to take shelter at the other side of the car, he laughed. "Hey Lacus."

The songstress peered cautiously at him from the window of the driver's seat. "What?"

"Can you make hot chocolate later for our trip?"

He saw Lacus bite her lower lip anxiously, slowly edging out of her cover. "Well, all right. But only if you – _eeeeeeek!_" Kira sprayer her again with the hose.

**_"Kira!" _**

_**0 0 0 0**_

"Ooh! Hot! Hot!" Dearka hissed as he plucked the bag of freshly micro waved popcorn into the counter. Miriallia rushed to his side with a disapproving glare and a pair of pink mitts in her hands.

"That's why they made oven mitts, sweetie." She ripped the bag easily and poured the popcorn in the waiting bowl sitting next to the microwave oven. "Can you pop those watermelon slices in the blender?"

Dearka watched as his girlfriend deposited the popcorn in the bowl with a small smile. Sundays were reserved for Family Days in the Haww Residence, and what with Miriallia leaving tomorrow, this specific Sunday was special. The parents had insisted on a competitive game of Monopoly. Now the good part about this is that he loved to hang out with the Hawws. They were really cool people that loved to laugh.

The downside of this is that he sucked at Monopoly. He could not even guess how people can actually strategize in the game. IN the past two Sundays he'd spent with them, all he ever did was buy every property he landed on and hoped for the best that other players landed on it in order to get rent. Unfortunately, nature made him to be a great soldier but not a good businessman. By the time they were in the middle of the game, he was technically broke and survived mainly on the two hundred dollars he got every time he passed _Go!_

What was worse was that it seemed like all luck would turn against him and he would always land on the _Go To Jail _square. But then again, that was better than running around on the board and losing more money that way. Jail was most definitely safer.

Rushing over to the blender on the other side of the kitchen, he smiled at the sight of a big bowl of freshly cubed watermelon sitting next to it. Looking over his shoulder to check if Miriallia was not looking, he plucked one cube of the fruit and popped it in his mouth. Man, did he ever love watermelon!

"I saw that, Dearka," Miriallia said.

The Buster pilot choked on the nabbed fruit and whirled around to see her giving him another rueful look, all the popcorn transferred to the bowl. "It was just one tiny piece!" he explained, quickly, somehow finding the humor in it all.

Miriallia shook her head. "Whatever am I going to do with you?" She went to his side and shooed him away. "Now go take the popcorn to the living room. I'll follow shortly with the juice."

One thing that Dearka appreciated in the weeks he had spent with Miriallia's family is that he got to experience working with Miriallia in almost anything she did in the day. Jogging in the morning, setting up the table, working in the kitchen, reading before bedtime... He sure as hell knew that he would be missing these days the moment they return to Abashiri, so decided to enjoy this last day with her and her family.

Slowly, he brushed back the hair covering the nape of her neck and touched his lips ever so lightly on her skin. "Okay."

His girlfriend giggled at his kiss. He had discovered this just yesterday, her tickle spot. And he enjoyed the discovery. With a dignified grunt, she swatted him away. "No more watermelon for you! Now get out of here."

Dearka laughed good-naturedly. Everything was going so well for him right now. If it weren't for Fallon, who he knew would be coming with them to Japan, his life would have been perfect. At the memory of the annoying fifteen-year old, Dearka frowned. Where the heck did she go to anyway? He hadn't seen her anywhere in the memorial earlier. Not that he was complaining. But it sure was a shock to him to discover she did not try to torment him the rest of the day. Grabbing the bowl of popcorn and leaving Miriallia with the blender and fruit, he made his way through the residence as he sighed. He was going to miss this house.

"Are you all right, dear?" A voice came from the living room the moment he entered.

It was Emmy. She was sitting on the broad, carpeted floor, her legs tucked under her. Typical, loving and caring Mrs. Haww. She sat there with her hair held back by a blue kerchief as she opened the rectangular flat box holding the board game they were playing that afternoon, but she momentarily paused when she saw the tan boy enter the room.

"Of course I am. Why shouldn't I be?" he asked with a grin, setting the bowl on the floor next to the kind lady and sitting across from her on the floor. "Need help with that?"

She shook her head. "Oh, no dear. I can do it." Managing to open the box carefully, she spread out the board on the floor and started to distribute the denominations into four. "You had a blank look on your face when you came in. I thought you weren't feeling well."

"Well, aside from the irrational fear of getting owned for one final time in this game, I'd say I'm feeling all right."

This made the lady laugh. "You are not really very good at this, are you?"

"Not a bit."

She eyed him with a strange look. "What I meant was saying goodbye."

And with this, Dearka blinked back at her. You just couldn't hide anything from a mother. He nodded. "I'll miss staying here in Orb with you guys, Emmy. I wish I could stay longer..."

She continued to distribute the play money as she smiled. "Well, you can always visit us whenever you can, dear. Our door is always open to you."

The statement made Dearka's heart tingle. "Thank you."

"Please take care of my little girl for me. She tends to get quite attached to people easily." Finishing the distribution of the money, she started to arrange the title deed cards neatly by color. "She loves you very much. Please watch over her for me. A mother can't help but worry..."

Not knowing how to respond to absolute trust the woman was giving him, he scratched his head in embarrassment. "You didn't have to tell me, Emmy. You know I will watch over her."

Another glance from her. "Thank you, dear. That makes me feel a lot better to know someone will take care of my little girl."

It was starting to make Dearka uncomfortable, the way the Hawws automatically trust him, and so he was glad when Albert Haww stumbled inside the living room from the patio and chuckled his rich chuckle when he saw the game and the popcorn all set for their round of ass-kicking. Miriallia's father was good at the game.

"Ahh, another Sunday," he boomed, taking his place next to his wife and grabbing a handful of popcorn. "Are you ready to lose again, my boy?"

Dearka laughed at his confidence. "I'm sitting here, waiting to be shot, sir. As ready as I'll ever be."

"Oh, don't talk that way, Dearka," Milly said as she came swept into the room with a jug of iced watermelon juice and four tall glasses set on a tray. "Let's kick Dad's behind because he always wins."

The older man sniffed. "I'd like to see you try, Miriallia. I'd like to see you try."

Dearka got to his feet and took the tray from her. "Well, I'm going down fighting. Even if I have to fight in Jail... " The thought made him grumble. "I hope I don't go to jail today..."

In ten or so minutes, however, Dearka found himself forlornly sitting out two turns in jail, right after paying an income tax to the bank, and he only had two properties! When it was Miriallia's turn and he saw her land on the square that says _Go To Jail_, Dearka almost bolted to his feet, almost knocking down his half consumed glass of Juice.

"Hah! Finally! You get to go to Jail with me!" He pumped his fist into the air.

Miriallia grinned evilly and brandished a yellow card she had gotten when she got the Chance Card. "Read 'em and weep, rookie."

His eyes widened when he saw it was the ever precious _Get Out of Jail For Free _Card. He felt all the blood rise to his face. It was then he decided that he utterly hated this game. They played for about an hour or so until the end, Mrs. Haww won. Albert was actually asking for a rematch, much to Dearka's horror, but was immediately relieved when Emmy said she was going to start cooking dinner. Goodie. He didn't have to endure another humiliating defeat in the hands of anyone that night.

So the family had to go on and continue with whatever they were doing. Mrs. Haww off to cook dinner, Mr. Haww to change that annoying light bulb blinking in the back porch, and Dearka and Miriallia to clean up on the mess they had made in the living room.

"That wasn't so bad, now was it?" she asked as she folded the board into its box while Dearka gathered all the play money.

"Well, I'm used to losing, so I guess I'm not that bothered." He laughed a little as they finally managed to put away the game under the table where they put all their board games. After brushing his hands together, he crashed on the couch and sighed. "Damn, I'm glad that's over."

Miriallia took her seat next to him and poked him in the sides. "Aww come on. Admit it. You enjoy these games."

The Buster pilot grinned. "Well I like it when I earn money even while I'm in jail for some weird reason."

She chortled happily as she leaned her head on his shoulder. "I'll miss doing this when we go back to Abashiri tomorrow," she said sadly, cuddling closer to him.

The Buster pilot touched his temple on her head and inhaled her strawberry scented hair. Finally he was getting used to having her snuggling up to him without freaking out. "Me, too. I think I've fallen in love with your family, Miriallia... "

Somehow, this made the girl very happy. "Well, they have, too. At least I won't be having problems with you guys getting along. Thank you so much for being you, Dearka... even if you are such a loser in Monopoly."

He grinned crookedly. "Say. When we get to Abashiri, what say we buy our own Monopoly board game and challenge Cagalli and the rest to a friendly game?"

"Hmmm... " she murmured. "Not a bad idea... Maybe going back to Abashiri wouldn't be so bad after all... "

Ruffling her orange-brown hair, Dearka nodded and closed his eyes, leaning his head back on the couch and breathing in. He might as well enjoy every minute of it while he was still there.

_Ah, yes... maybe going back to Abashiri won't be that bad at all..._

_**0 0 0 0 **_

"So Princess Cagalli Yula Attha. In your stay in Orb, you have eased the tension out of your people, held a beautiful memorial, you made me feel a lot better than I ever had felt in months since the cease-fire, you convinced Kira to take Lacus out to spend the night in the mountains and you forced Yzak tocome here. Tell me. Is there anything you can't do?" Athrun asked as he shifted his position on the blanket he and Cagalli had spread over the sand in the beach where they had planned their picnic.

Nothing could have been more beautiful than that night. What with stars popping out one by one in the darkening horizon above him, a basket of food near his head, and the love of his life lying down next to him on the blanket, he decided that if ever he would die tomorrow, he would be happy.

Cagalli lazily pointed to the star that had just appeared right on top of her. She had been awfully tired the moment the memorial ended, and she had crashed on the blanket the moment Athrun had fixed it. "A lot of things, you would be surprised."

Propping his head on his hand and lying on his side to look at his girlfriend, the Justice pilot smiled. The faint lights of the lamp posts at the edge of the beach cast lovely shadows on the princess' tired face. Yzak was right. Cagalli did look thinner. But still beautiful... So beautiful to his eyes... He will have to fatten her up a bit when they get back to Japan.

"Are you all right? You don't look too good."

She laughed at this, letting the hand that was pointing up at the stars drop to her side. "Yeah. I'm just happy everything turned out all right. For me, for you. For everyone. Everything is going so well that it's too hard to believe it's really happening." She closed her eyes, then opened them again. "And tomorrow, I get to relax."

The Justice pilot followed her gaze, up into the cloudless night. "What are you thinking about?"

"Me? Oh, just wondering where we were up there... floating in space... aimlessly..." she yawned loudly. "Excuse me."

Athrun laughed a bit. "You sure you're okay?"

Cagalli brushed his question aside. "Of course." Rolling to her side, she shoved Athrun onto his back and rested her head on his chest. "How about you? What are you thinking right now?"

"Ah, nothing in particular. I'm just a little worried about you."

"Stop it. I'm fine."

"Well, all right." And for that brief moment, Athrun did not move. This was one of the times when Cagalli actually got to relax, and if she found it relaxing for him not to worry about her, then so be it. Gingerly, he ran a hand though her blond hair, easing out the knots and tangles in them. "Cagalli?"

"Hm?"

"I love you so much."

With this, Cagalli raised her head to look into his face. She eyed him weirdly. "That was sudden." She rested her head back on his chest. "I love you, too. Now shut up and let me sleep."

Athrun blinked and kept still, his eyes roaming the endless sea of stars above them. "So you are going to sleep on me, are you?"

"What else is there to do than to sleep?"

He laughed. "All right. Sleep well then. I'll just lie down and… err… pretend I'm a pillow."

She pinched his side, making him jerk a bit. "Okay, okay. I'll roll off of you." She was about to move away, but Athrun slinked his way around her shoulders, pinning her to him. "Where do you think you're going?"

"Off my pillow," she muttered, trying to break free of his embrace. "Now let me go."

Athrun shook his head. "I didn't say you have to get off. Just stay here. I don't mind."

Now in normal circumstances, he knew that Cagalli would have put up a fight, even if she will lose. But right now, what with her energy pretty much drained from all the activities of the week, she struggled for a few seconds then finally gave in, keeping her head on his chest and her hand draped over his stomach.

"Athrun?" she murmured after a few moments of silence.

"Yeah?"

"You smell like a ham sandwich…"

Well, of course he knew the reason to that. He was the one who made their snack while Cagalli was talking to some of the representatives. It was the least he could do to her. She had been so good to him. He knew that he couldn't repay her for all the things she had made him realize. Ever since they first met on that island… She had done so many things for him…

It was weird, the way people would know once they meet a person, they would automatically know that the person would be important or not. He breathed in Cagalli's hair and chuckled. "Why thank you. You smell like apples to me."

"My shampoo…" Cagalli explained lazily in a weak voice. She yawned then continued. "I like ham sandwiches… "

"Me, too. Would you like some? I have a bunch in the basket."

She didn't answer him, but instead snuggled closer to him, throwing one of her legs over him. It was one thing he had observed with Cagalli before she went to sleep. She always had this long pillow she would throw her legs over. Without it, she would be cranky waking up the next day. So he automatically knew that she was getting ready to sleep. "What did you put in the sandwich…?"

Puzzled, the Justice pilot shrugged his shoulders a bit. "Well, I put some ham in it of course."

"Ham… " Cagalli repeated dreamily.

"And pickles…"

"Pickles…" she murmured again.

"Mayonnaise…"

"Mayo…"

"some relish… "

"Hmm…"

Athrun felt his stomach growl loudly. Feeling his face heat up, he looked down at her to see if the growling had disturbed her, but was slightly pleased to see she had fallen asleep… She deserved to rest… She was such a hard worker…

Letting his eyes once again gaze up at the millions upon millions of stars up in the sky, he grinned to himself. Everything that he needed to live was on that blanket… He was glad that tomorrow, she would get to sleep all she wanted… They were going back to Japan tomorrow, and Cagalli could finally stop growing up too fast.

Planting a kiss on top of her head, he leaned his head back and watched a small thin light streak through the darkness. He will have to make sure he would stay awake. That wouldn't be much of a problem. He loved to watch Cagalli sleep…

_**0 0 0 0**_

**_Yuugiri: Just an interlude. Enjoy it while it lasts. In the next chapters, we will be getting back on track with the plot that some of you might not like… _**

**_Anyway, some of the characters mentioned in the past chapters will also be making an appearance somewhere in the next three chapters. (grins evilly) Enter Kian! (watches as Yzak grabs him by the hair and slams his face against a tree) Nah, I don't think that will be happening anytime soon. LOL!_**

_**Thank you for the reviews! Me likes all your support! **_


	30. Phase 30: He Asked, No One Answered

_**Disclaimer: I so not own Gundam Seed.**_

_**0-- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_**August 5, AW **_

Cagalli lazily followed Lacus down the aisle of Ralse's Department Store, not the least bit interested in the dozens upon dozens of clothes surrounding her. It had never ceased to amaze her how indifferent she was about clothing, and how Lacus seemed to take pleasure in almost all varieties of it. Long skirts, short skirts and skirts in between... She never really did like skirts. It had always made moving so difficult to do.

"What do you think, Cagalli?" The pink-haired songstress asked as she retrieved a lavender, long-sleeved sweater hanging along with its pastel-colored brethren in the nearest rack.

"That would look really good on you," the Princess of Orb said.

It had only been four days since they came back to Abashiri, yet it did not have to take an expert to notice that the seasons were changing too early. Although technically it was still summer, evenings were starting to get really cold, and Lacus had insisted for them to go shopping after class for a new set of clothes they could use this Fall. Having nothing better to do as it was a Friday, she grudgingly agreed. Unfortunately, Miriallia was not able to accompany them. She said she needed to look for a subject for her photography class.

The memory of the brunette made Cagalli groan in despair. The girl was honestly too nice...

From the very moment they had gotten back, Dearka had not wasted any time in making sure Fallon, that little half-Coordinator leech, was going to be shipped off to Tokyo this week, where all of her other Blue Cosmos supporters were. For some weird reason, things were getting a bit delayed and the girl was then handed over to Miriallia for baby-sitting. Dearka, of course, was outraged. He didn't like the girl. Come to think of it, neither did Cagalli. But Miriallia seemed to have a soft spot for her. Which was weird. It was obvious Fallon liked Dearka to the point of obsession... Could it be that Miriallia was the only one who didn't realize that?

"You know, you have nice skin, Cagalli. Pastels would compliment you very well."

Cagalli snapped back into reality and blinked a few times at the realization that Lacus was looking at her weirdly. "What?" she asked.

The songstress merely smiled at her, handing her a bubble gum blue hooded jacket, then said, "You would look nice in that. Why don't you try it on?"

Cagalli stared down at the hoody, then bit her lower lip uncertainly. "I wasn't planning to buy anything today."

"Why not?"

She shrugged, draping the hoody on the rack to her right, where Lacus immediately picked it up again, eyeing it doubtfully. "I don't know. I don't like clothes that much." Which was entirely true. But the way Lacus looked at her, it was as if she didn't believe her.

"Why not?" she asked again.

Cagalli blinked at her, unsure of what to say now. "Ah, well…" Looking around the place to satisfy Lacus' desire for her to pick out something and buy it, she grabbed a navy blue jacket and smiled. "All right. I think I'll buy this. It seems warm enough. I think this will last me all Fall."

Lacus seemed to have been satisfied with this, and she started to move on after looking at the thing in her hand, and then discarding it back on the pile of clothes to her left. "You know, it won't hurt to be a little vain once in a while."

This amused the princess to no end. She had never really considered it, trying to be a _'little vain'_. She did not think it served as much worth as it costs… "Why is that?"

Lacus looked over her shoulder. "You have a boyfriend, Cagalli. It is your responsibility to look beautiful and stay looking that way for your man."

The mere thought of it made Cagalli snort. "Athrun?"

"Of course. Who else?"

"Athrun doesn't care what I wear."

"Doesn't he?" Lacus stopped walking to examine a pile of sweaters.

Cagalli furrowed her brow and looked at herself from the full-length mirror standing to her right while Lacus busied herself with digging into the pile of clothes. Examining herself in her short A.U uniform, she frowned. In all honesty, she had never asked Athrun what he thought about her when it came to her looks. Maybe it mattered little to her, what he thought, but then again, she could vaguely remember getting slightly pissed when he would not look at her when she was half-naked. She wasn't _that _unattractive, was she?

Unconsciously running her hand through her scraggly hair, suddenly becoming fully aware how messy it was, a small voice suddenly spoke in her mind.

_"Lacus is right, you know... Athrun is a man, however nice he is to you. It is your responsibility to be pretty for your man..."_

Lacus appeared by her shoulder and leaned her head on hers. "What are you thinking?"

Cagalli blinked, then smiled at her reflection. "You of all people should know what Athrun wants in a girl, Lacus. You've been engaged before."

This remark startled Lacus a bit, and perhaps Cagalli understood. Now that she's mentioned it, she had never really had this kind of conversation with the songtress. And maybe it shouldn't be much of a big deal to them both, their broken engagement, as it shouldn't matter between friends. But right now, as Cagalli looked at Lacus' neatly tied back hair, the way she looked so adorably feminine in her uniform, how she carried herself like a real lady, she could not help but feel greatly insecure.

Lacus was the only woman Athrun had devoted his heart to, before her...

"Do you think... Athrun really cares how I dress myself?"

Lacus raised her eyebrows. "He is a man, after all." With this, she clutched Cagalli's arm eagerly. "I was wondering, perhaps you would like to go to the parlor and get ourselves a trim or something?" Her eyes twinkled beautifully. "Just a thought, though."

Cagalli did not know how to respond to that. At first she had felt like protesting, but as she looked at herself in the mirror, with her uncontrollable long hair, she decided that yes, maybe a trim wouldn't be bad at all. Smiling, she nodded.

"All right."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Yzak trudged down the bus with a grunt, looked up at the building standing tall and menacing in front if him and for the millionth time that hour asked himself what the heck he was doing. Right after his last class, Yzak had deliberately left campus without Kari's consent and immediately hopped on the bus to Higashimokoto without so much as looking back.

For the past four days of him being there in Abashiri, nothing was in his mind more than the great mystery that is Karina Takano. And he truly believed that the answers he wanted were not in Abashiri at all.

But what scared him the most was the uncertainty of it being here as well. No one was giving him the damn answers he needed to know. And it was eating him alive.

"I'm here to see Kian Takano," he said flatly to the receptionist behind the desk lobby. The woman had a pinched look on her face when she looked up. At the sight of him, she frowned even more. It reminded Yzak of a person who had been sucking on lemons.

"Mr. Takano can only be requested audience by family," she said, narrowing her beady eyes at her. "Are you family?"

Yzak had anticipated this. Smiling stiffly, he nodded. "I'm his sister's boyfriend. Does that count?"

At the mention of this, the woman's face broke into a wide smile. Yzak wished she'd just stay frowning. Her face looked like it was going to crack up. "Oh! So you are Kari's boyfriend! She is such a nice girl. I never really thought she would ever find a man to love her the way you do."

Yzak paled. "Excuse me?"

The lady held out a pen and a piece of paper to him, sliding it on the desk across to him. "She seldom talks about you when she visits, but when she does, she speaks of you fondly. Now, please sign here and proceed to the corridor at the left. Yzak, is it? Yes? Ah, what a nice name."

After a few more minutes of useless babbling, Yzak found himself sitting inside a huge white room with benches and tables scattered here and there. Aside from a little girl sitting on one of the benches in the far corner, huddled with a tall boy talking quietly about something, Yzak was alone. Once again, he asked himself what he was doing there… He was arguing with himself on leaving, but jumped in surprise when the door on the other side of the room opened noisily.

He didn't know what made him scramble to a standing position when the person he had been waiting for suddenly entered the room.

Those eyes, catlike and quite fluid, stared at him with the wariness of a predator. But aside from that, Yzak was surprised to sense no hostility from him.

If anything, Kian looked… resigned.

Yzak shifted from where he stood for about a few seconds, then cleared his throat before speaking. "I need to talk to you."

For a split second, Kian stiffened. His eyes never left him as he made his way to the other side of the long table adjacent from him. "So," he said. Yzak didn't recognize his voice. The last time he had heard him speak, he was screaming. Right now, he was merely… quiet. Stable. "I heard you and Kari are going out."

This caught the Duel pilot completely by surprise. He shrugged a bit and sighed. "Yeah."

An uncertain spark twinkled in the red-haired boy's eyes. "Yeah, thought it would happen." He planted his hands on the surface of the table, stared at the ground for a bit, then coughed weakly. "She really likes you, you know? I've never thought she would fall in love with a man. She has always been…" his eyes met Yzak's. "… trying so hard not to fall in love. Or maybe that's the main reason for it…"

Yzak felt his left cheek twitch involuntarily at the mention of whatever feelings Kari had for him. He had never really made such a big deal out of it, whatever she saw in him. Maybe it was because it really didn't matter much. "It's funny you had to bring her up. I want to talk to you about her."

"What about her?"

"Everything."

And they were silent.

Yzak could see the red-haired boy's hands clench into fists. "Listen," he said, his voice strained. "If you know what's best for you, you will stop asking these questions. God, I am not in the mood for this… "

Yzak blinked. "Neither am I. But there are some things I desperately needed to know. And no one back there wants to help me."

Kian's mouth twisted into an ugly frown. After a moment's pause, he shook his head in disgust. "She has been acting weird lately. I noticed it too, every time she would visit… She doesn't seem to be herself at all."

That was the understatement of the century. "Yes, and I don't want her being this way any more than you do." And it was the truth. He didn't want her thinking too much about so many things he couldn't even help her with. Perhaps that is where she has been getting her headaches. Ever since they went to Orb, her headaches wouldn't stop.

Kian stared at him for the longest possible time, then narrowed his eyes into slits. "Having you here is the reason why she is experiencing this." He still looked bored, even though Yzak thought he should be shouting. "If you want her to stop acting this way, then go away and leave her alone."

Yzak growled, not willing to digest what he had just heard. "I can't and I won't."

"Why not?"

'_Cause I need her…_

"That's none of your freaking business. Now tell me what I did that made her this way."

Green eyes flashed once more as Kian glared at him sharply. "You made her fall in love with you. You, a Coordinator… You always make things worse for my family. Why do you always have to show up and take them away from me?" he demanded, startling Yzak greatly. The guy was showing great signs of a manic-depressive. _"WHY?"_

The sudden outburst threw Yzak off the loop. "What?"

"Why do you have to come along and take my sister away from me all over again?" he asked so vulnerably, making Yzak think of a hurting child. Slowly falling on a sitting position on the bench, he buried his face in his hands. "Don't take her away from me all over again. Please don't take her away from me again…"

Yzak could not help but cringe, and wondered once again if this person really was crazy. He didn't care. He was the only one potentially able to provide him with information about his girlfriend. Sitting down across him, he grabbed the pen tucked in his breast pocket and used it to poke the guy's arm. He didn't dare touch him. "Get a hold of yourself. What do you mean take her away from you?" He started to argue with himself if Kari had had a Coordinator boyfriend before him. Squashing the jealousy out of his brain for a second, he huffed. He will have to ask Kari herself about her past love life, not that he would care – coz he **_didn't _**care! Not one bit.

He poked the boy again with his pen. "Hey, talk to me!"

Kian was livid as he raised his face to meet his. "She denied everyone in her family just to be with him… and now you are going to do it all over again. Leave her alone! **_Just fucking leave her alone!_**" and with this, Kian bolted to his feet and ran out the door like the madman that he was.

After a moment of contemplating on what had just happened, Yzak stood up and started to leave. He didn't get anything out of this, but perhaps the MemS can help him with something.

Kira and Athrun were waiting for him in the School Gym, this he knew. Maybe if they were able to understand what the MemS was for, then perhaps they would be able to decipher Kari's memories of everything.

This day sucked...

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Miriallia gathered her short skirt as she sat down on the cool grass under the shade of the tall tree closest to the bank of Abashiri Lake. Not too far away was Dearka lying on his back, his black uniform coat thrown over his face as his hands picked on the grass lazily.

"Are you all right?" she asked, rummaging through her tote bag for her newly bought digital camera. She had enrolled in an additional advanced photography class the moment she got back to Japan, and she had been desperately scouting around for subjects for their first assignment. Dearka had insisted on coming along with her. To get away from Fallon or to simply be with her, she did not know.

Fallon had been a handful to him, needless to say, and although the little half-Coordinator had been staying in the orphanage the last few days, she seemed to enjoy popping out of nowhere and grabbing Dearka around the neck for a choke hold.

If this was one way she expressed how she liked someone, she did not want to imagine what she will do when she falls in love.

Dearka pulled the coat off of his face and looked over to her. "Do you hear it?" he murmured.

Milly blinked a bit and strained her ears to listen to whatever Dearka was referring to. "Hear what?"

The Buster pilot closed his eyes and inhaled slowly. "Shhhh! Listen to it. It's wonderful."

"What is?" she asked, confused.

"The silence that is brought by the absence of Fallon… "

"Huh?" Miriallia stared at him for a second, then burst out laughing. Finally finding the camera she was looking for, she looked out into the lake and contentedly stretched a bit. It was such a fine day, and the breeze was once again signifying that tonight was going to be freezing. It was strange how summer was ending so soon, about a month ahead of schedule. She didn't care. She loved the cold.

She heard Dearka sit up next to her and poked her ribs, making her squeal. "So have you found a subject for your shots?"

Milly shook her head. "I'm waiting for inspiration." She raised the camera a few inches from her face and took a picture of her boyfriend's smiling face, and with this, she scanned the area with alert eyes, making sure to spot any potential objects for her subject. "Perhaps the lake is a bad idea after all. Most of the things here are so lifeless." She looked out into the lake's placid surface. There weren't even any people around aside from them.

"You want to go somewhere else then?"

"Sure." She was about to stand up when she heard a faint rustling from behind them. Dearka was already on guard and whirled around, but he was – unfortunately – not fast enough. Out of nowhere shot out a blur of blonde hair, and Dearka was tackled to the ground with a loud grunt. Milly screamed bloody murder.

"Fallon! What on earth are you doing!"

She watched in horror as the two rolled on the ground once, twice and a third time before stopping at the edge of the lake with Dearka on top of the feisty girl, his arm pressing against her collarbone, his teeth bared viciously at her. Abandoning her things completely, Milly ran to them, stumbling clumsily down the bank and slipping twice before managing to get to them.

They were arguing the moment she arrived by their side.

"... bit my ear and kicked me in the groin, but did you see me complain? No! I try my very hardest to get along with you, and I honestly think I am doing a good job of it. But what makes me wonder is why the heck do you want to kill me?" Dearka ranted, narrowing his lavender eyes at her with so much hate that Miriallia gasped.

Fallon did not seem moved by his little speech. "You hate me as much as I hate you anyways. So stop acting all righteous, Coordinator!"

Dearka's eyes widened, incredulous. "Hate you? God, I _despise _you! From the very moment I met you, all you ever wanted was to make my life a living hell! And I never even did anything to you! You hate my guts simply because I was born the way I am, and you're telling me I'm _acting righteous_? Get over yourself, kid!"

Miriallia's mouth worked wordlessly as she danced from one foot to another, unsure of what to do next. She looked around desperately, searching for a way to get to stop this.

Fallon snarled loudly. "No, you get over yourself! You think you can bully me just because you are stronger, huh?"

Dearka scoffed loudly, making sure he had a firm grip on Fallon's other arm. "Bully you? You've been the one bullying me! I haven't even so much as tried to _touch_ you with a ten-foot pole unless it were out of self-defense! Now what I am really bothered with is why the hell does it have to be me? Reality check here, kid. I'm not the only Coordinator living in this country! So why the heck do you dedicate your freaking life to torment mine?"

Now as Miriallia looked at Fallon, waiting in all honesty about what she was going to say, she could not believe what happened next. The girl's face scrunched up into a tight frown, and a tear tricked down her left cheek. "Because you are a dense idiot man-beast that doesn't have any feelings!"

Nothing, absolutely nothing, could have made less sense to Miriallia. She was not blind not to notice that Fallon was greatly disturbed and needed quite a bit of extra attention, but the sudden transition of having her want to rip out Dearka's throat, to the little girl who was calling Dearka insensitive, drove her mind to a mental roller coaster. Where the heck was she getting to, anyway?

Dearka, at the sight of Fallon crying, looked at Miriallia uncertainly, then back at the girl. "Hey," he said uncertainly. "Don't cry. Now I'm getting off of you if you promise me you won't try to strangle me again, or bite me in the ear, or kick me between the legs. Is that a deal?"

"I don't care! Go to hell!" She cried even more.

Miriallia bit her lower lip nervously as she watched Dearka slowly eased his arm off of Fallon's shoulders, then immediately pushed himself up. Miriallia sighed in relief when she watched the Buster pilot try to stand up but gasped when he was forced back down into a sitting position by something that Miriallia believed should, by all means, not be there!

There, linking Dearka's right wrist to Fallon's left, was a thin silver chain, connecting two thick bracelets. Miriallia wanted to faint. Fallon had handcuffed herself to Dearka!

Dearka was pale with fury. "What the hell are you up to now?" he raged, tugging on the handcuffs madly, making Fallon's slender arm wave about. "Get these off! Now!"

Fallon sniffed loudly, sitting up silently and shaking her head with a stubbornness of a mule. "No, you insensitive moron! I won't get it off!"

This was not happening. Miriallia hurriedly kneeled by Dearka and touched Fallon's shoulder. "Fallon, this isn't funny. You do have the key to it, right?"

And for the first time since the moment she had laid eyes on the Blue Cosmos supporter, Fallon stared back at her with so much emotion in her eyes that Miriallia didn't know what to think. The girl was eyeing her while pouting. "I do."

"Get it off! Get it off!" Dearka whined pathetically.

Miriallia ignored him. She held out her hand. "Give it to me. We have a lot of things to do still, and this is not the time to play games. You weren't supposed to leave the orphanage without Dearka or me with you. You disobeyed orders. Now give me the key."

Miriallia could see Fallon's right hand clutching something, and having suspicions that it was what they needed to free the tan boy, who looked like he was hyperventilating, she reached out and tried to pry it away from her. "Give it to me. Now."

At first, Fallon looked like she was going to give in, but for the love of her, Miriallia watched as the girl wrenched her fist from her hands and, as if in slow motion, chucked the metallic object into the air.

Right into the middle of Abashiri Lake. It made a little unceremonious _'plonk!'_ before sinking into the otherwise placid surface of the water.

**_"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" _**Dearka wailed pitifully, grabbing a handful of his blonde locks as if he had just heard that the sun was going to explode. Or perhaps to him it was the exact same thing. He really did hate Fallon...

Which Miriallia couldn't help but feel after she watched some bubbles rise up from where the key had sunk. It took all her self control not to dive after it. Fallon was chained to Dearka. Dearka was chained to Fallon... And the world had immediately fallen out of its orbit.

With this, Dearka tried to calm himself. "We can get it sawed off. It's still early. If we can get to the shop classroom in time, we can – "

Miriallia shook her head as she eyed the handcuffs with a withered look. "You can't."

"I can't? What do you mean I can't? Of course I can! I can run there in five minutes with this freak over my shoulder! I can – "

"You heard me. You can't." Miriallia groggily placed a hand on her forehead. This was not going to be a good day. "These handcuffs are made from Orb. These are tried and tested. There's only one way you can get these off and that's with the key." Which was now in the bottom of Abashiri Lake...

Miriallia swore that Dearka's dark complexion lightened about a few shades of gray. He was silent for a minute, examined the handcuffs with a dead look, discovered that she was probably right, then glared at Fallon, who was now sulking silently and apparently not the least bit guilty of what she had just done.

"There's nothing left to do..." Dearka croaked. "I'll have to chew my arm off..."

Miriallia glared at him. "You will do no such thing."

"But Miriallia...!"

"What?" she snapped.

"I don't want to be handcuffed to her!" he whimpered again, clutching Miriallia's arm pleadingly.

And in all honesty, neither did she. But right now, there really wasn't much of a choice. She sighed. "Let's go back to the orphanage. I think I'm gonna be sick..."

She did not get sick, of course. But the moment they got back to the orphanage did Miriallia soon find out the reason why Fallon had reacted that way.

There, sitting in the middle of the playroom, was a lady with white-blond hair she recognized to be one of Burin Dellit's assistants who had distributed to them the manila envelopes when they had first arrived in the country. She looked like a nice enough lady, but by the way Fallon hissed at her, one would think she was some wicked witch or something.

The lady, who introduced herself as Miss Bloom Wyatt, explained to them that she was there to pick up Fallon and escort her to Tokyo, but the girl had bolted out the door the moment she had mentioned about the trip.

"Shall we go now, then?" asked the lady kindly as she held out her hand to Fallon, who was hiding behind a disgruntled Dearka. "The car is waiting."

Miriallia cleared her throat. "Err, ma'am, I'm so sorry to inform you that ah... well... You can't take her with you..."

Ms. Wyatt looked at her quizzically. "Why not?"

Dearka roughly pulled Fallon out from behind him, completely showing his right wrist, displaying his current state. "Coz if you take her away, I'm coming, too."

Ms. Wyatt let out a strangled gasp. "Oh, dear me...! She did that to you?"

"Apparently. She handcuffed herself to me and threw away the key. Now I know why," Dearka hissed angrily as Fallon grinned up at him toothily. "She needed a rock to anchor on."

Miriallia was utterly speechless. She didn't know what to do, or what to say... A whirlwind of thoughts flashed through her mind's eye and everything seemed to draw in on her, the events of the two-week's escapades in Orb.

_"If I were you, I'd watch that girl, Milly. She has got it bad for your man," _Cagalli's voice echoed in her head.

_"Oh, how cute! Fallon has a little crush on Dearka!" _came Lacus' voice.

Miriallia frowned. It was most certainly not cute at all! She had always tried to smile and laugh at whatever Fallon did to her boyfriend but that was because she had been technically harmless. But now that everything was coming in clear for her, she was not the least bit happy that Fallon was chained to _her _boyfriend like a dog.

Ms. Wyatt was not pleased either. "Oh dear me... I never really anticipated this... I surely can't take you with me to Tokyo. My orders are to take _this _girl with me... Oh, dear. What to do. What to do." She shook her head disapprovingly as she whipped out her cellular phone and started to dial a number. Placing the phone to her ears, Miriallia watched in dread as she started to talk to someone, explaining the whole situation as briefly as possible. All the while, Miriallia wrung her hands desperately. Dearka seemed to have aged fifty years while he listened to Ms. Wyatt.

"Are you sure with that?" the lady asked, eyeing Fallon who looked at Dearka with a suspicious eye. "Uh-huh... yeah... Uh-huh... I know that... Yes... I know that! But there really isn't anything I can do... If I had the keys here with me, then we wouldn't be having this talk, now would we?" She paused for a bit, then casually grabbed Fallon's arm, examined the handcuffs thoroughly. "No can do... It's made from Orb..." There was a long pause, until she finally snapped her phone shut and shook her head as she shrugged in resignation. "Looks like you are stuck here for the meantime, little lady."

"Yessssssss!" Fallon exclaimed happily, clinging onto Dearka's arm excitedly. Dearka looked like he was sentenced to fifty years in prison.

Miriallia felt the same way.

_Oh, God have mercy... _She said to herself. She did not like the idea of Fallon being chained to Dearka like that at all. It was worse enough that she was obviously enjoying every second of it, but what was worse, Miriallia was, for the first time, feeling uneasily jealous...

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Lacus glanced up from the colorful magazine on her lap and searched the place where Cagalli was sitting primly on a chair with the male hairdresser, Antoine, sizing her up. Cagalli stared at her in horror as Antoine raised the sharp-looking pair of scissors near her face, making her shut her eyes tightly, her mouth murmuring a silent prayer for all of this to be over with soon.

The songstress could only shake her head ruefully as she closed the magazine and looked out the broad glass window looking out to the busy streets of downtown Abashiri and gasped when she discovered a pair of gray eyes looking back at her. Then she noticed the teeth next.

_Yalin…_

The dark-haired boy waved at her from outside, mouthed something, and pointed at the door. Lacus blinked a few times before scratching her head. It had been a while since she'd seen the boy around. Ever since she had patched things up with Kira, he seemed to have vanished into thin air. Looking over her shoulder, seeing Cagalli completely occupied with her little trim, she stood up from where she was and timidly made her way out the door.

"Hi there," he said the moment she stepped out of the salon. Running his hand through his thick hair, as if knowing he looked positively cute that way, he gestured behind him. "I was just passing by and I thought it was you there."

Lacus smiled uncomfortably, but was indeed too polite to run back inside. The boy had always had this effect on her; making her always want to run the opposite direction. "Yes, I was just accompanying Cagalli."

This made Yalin chuckle. "Ah, yes. The girl who kicks like a horse. I remember her."

"Err, yes. She does kick hard... when she is angry..."

With this, Lacus remembered the first time they had ever encountered Kian and his gang. It was in the soccer field. Of course Kira, Athrun and Yzak did a pretty good job bashing them about, and didn't she whack at least one of them with a bat? Oh, yes! That had been really exhilarating. She did not even know how strong she was until then, being the pampered little pop star that she was. She could not even believe how excited she was when the fight broke out in Notoro Misaki that rainy midnight. It was then did she understand completely why Cagalli was so eager in getting into one. It did provide a certain amount of satisfaction to throw a punch or two, especially when you have so much negative emotion towards someone. She will have to keep that in mind; punch something when feeling frustrated or angry or worse.

"I haven't seen you around much lately. You don't go grocery shopping at our supermarket anymore," he said, eyes curiously lingering on her face as she searched her brain for an excuse.

Too bad she was not that good at lying.

"_Kira _and I do the shopping downtown. It's a form of _bonding _we sort of practice every week," she explained, placing a good layer of emphasis on _Kira _and _bonding_.

She could see the complete change of reaction in the handsome boy's face at the mention of this, but recovering quickly, he displayed his beautiful smile again. "I see. I've missed seeing you, I guess."

Lacus felt herself blush faintly, and she covered it with her long pink bangs. "Umm, well..."

"Anyway," Yalin interrupted, sensing the discomfort she was in, stuffing a hand in his back pocket. "I hardly see you at school, too. You must be really busy."

"I guess I have," she muttered. She so wanted to run back inside.

Yalin suddenly started a thorough examination of his shoes, kicking a bit of dirt here and there. "Well, I was just wondering..." He looked up at her with an uncertainty that looked so completely out of place in his gray eyes. "There is going to be a small musical play on the seventh. That's on Tanabata day. And, well I kind of have two tickets to see – "

"Excuse me?" Lacus asked in horror. "Are you asking me out? On a _date_?"

Yalin blushed a bright red. "Well, that is kind of the gist of it..."

"Yalin, I really do not mean to be rude, but Kira and I are going out."

This made the boy grin boyishly. "It's not like you are married or anything. And it's just a play... so..."

Lacus was scandalized. "I am afraid I am not getting what you are saying." She eyed the door of the salon and wished she could just be like Cagalli and snap at the boy and leave without feeling utterly guilty.

Though it didn't really require that much. It seemed like luck was on her side. Out of nowhere flashed a blur of silvery-blue and Yzak materialized by her side.

"Is he bothering you?" he growled loudly, towering over Yalin with a menacing scowl.

Lacus swallowed hard and shook her head. "Err, no," she lied. The last thing she wanted was for Yzak to get into another fight. "He was _just leaving._"

Yalin's expression did not change, as if Yzak did not intimidate him at all. He merely stuffed his hands back into his pockets and backed away a step.

"Is he?" The Duel pilot cocked his head to the right. My, was Yzak ever in a bad mood. "I don't see him leaving."

"I was just about," Yalin said calmly, once more taking a step back and grinning at Lacus sweetly. "The offer still stands, though. If you change your mind."

"Better start walking," Yzak threatened.

Yalin slipped his hands out of his jeans and raised them in mock surrender. "I'm going. Sheesh!" And he started to walk away down the street, not in a hurry, but he never did look back.

Lacus finally breathed a sigh of relief and laughed to herself when she heard Yzak mumble something about men trying to invade marked territories.

"Thank you," the songstress said as she turned to Yzak with a smile. "He was quite persistent."

"Stupid guy and his stupid perfect teeth," was all Yzak said in return. After a while, as if realizing it for the first time, he narrowed his eyes at her. "You're not roaming around downtown alone, are you?"

She shook her head. "I'm not. Cagalli is inside, getting a haircut."

The announcement momentarily made Yzak pause. "Cagalli? A haircut?"

"Yes! Isn't it wonderful?"

Yzak blinked a few times then sniffed. "Whatever. Now go back inside." He did not even wait for her to respond to that. He immediately started stalking towards the alley that led back to A.U.

Lacus scratched her head, slightly bewildered. Where had Yzak come from all of a sudden? Shrugging and deciding that it really was none of her business, she went back inside the salon and started to feel very giddy. She couldn't wait to see Cagalli's new look.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Athrun ran a hand across the smooth surface of the MemS with as much enthusiasm as a dead fly. He did not like it one bit, the mere fact of being this close to this monstrosity of an invention. He himself had been quite fascinated with all types of machinery, but in his sixteen years, he had never dreamed about anything as dangerously unstable as this. He even wondered why the heck Kira wanted to try it out.

"Are you sure about this?" he asked the Freedom pilot as he looked over to Kira, who was presently fiddling with a few switches from behind one of the four machines.

"To be honest with you, I'd rather see these things dismantled and burned. But well, you see." His best friend scratched his mop of overly long brown hair and sighed. "Yzak asked me to help him with it... and well, he seldom does that. I just couldn't say no."

"I know, Kira." Athrun knelt down beside him and tried to figure out the controls to the contraptions and immediately frowned at the sight of a driver of some sort protruding out of what looked like the control panel. "What the...? This machine has a memory chip."

"Hmm," Kira mumbled as he flipped through the small notebook Yzak had handed him earlier in the week. It was full of both Yzak's and Kari's handwriting. "They still don't know what the machine does, really. But they are having suspicions that it somehow reacts to negative memories at a certain degree." He tapped the memory chip thoughtfully with the tip of the notebook. "Technically, the machine is harmless. It all depends on how people respond to what they see inside. Pretty much like how I did."

Athrun narrowed his eyes at the machine's control panel. "What's the memory chip for, then?"

"Probably for Kari's research. But now that you've mentioned it, another unique feature of the MemSis that it can forge memories with others."

"What do you mean?"

"According to Yzak's notes, when he tried it in order to reach Kari's thoughts, he had to go through mine." Kira rubbed his chin thoughtfully, slightly disturbed. "So from his memories, to mine, from mine to Kari's. But the moment he did reach Kari's thoughts, the machine rejected him and booted him out."

Trying to decipher the logic in the contraption standing in front of him, he kneeled down next to Kira, pressed a few buttons on the control panel and ejected the memory device. It was a small, flat, heavy object that reminded Athrun of old-fashioned twentieth century hard drives. "Didn't Miriallia use this machine even before you did?"

Kira nodded, flipping through the notebook hastily. "Actually, that's what made them discard their original theory to begin with. It's imperative that a person _will _have a relatively negative experience. I doubt Miriallia is any different." He frowned. "But I didn't see anything there at all that resembled her memories."

This made Athrun look down at the device in his hands with utmost confusion. "Then what the heck does it do?"

"I don't know." Kira snapped the notebook shut. "But I intend to find out."

There has to be a certain logic behind this, and it would most certainly be an embarrassment to Athrun if he, of all people, couldn't figure it out. Inserting the memory chip back in, he got to his feet and nodded. "I'm giving it a go."

Kira stared hard at him for a brief second, then stood up. "I'm going back in, too."

Athrun was about to argue with him, considering what had happened the last time Kira used it, when Kari arrived in a hurry with her usual bundle of paperwork. He was automatically alarmed to see that she did not have her usual small smile.

"Yzak isn't here, either, is he?" she asked, very much showing a rare display of disappointment in her voice as she laid all her things on the floor next to Kira's backpack.

Athrun looked at his watch. Come to think of it, Yzak should have been here three hours ago, right after his last class... And it was not like him to make Kari worry. It was a sure bet Yzak left without saying so much as boo to his girlfriend.

"I'm sure he'll be here any minute now. He said he was just going on a short errand," Kira said, trying to make her feel a little better. Athrun didn't know if Kira really was informed by Yzak where he was going. He doubted it. If the Duel pilot did not tell Kari, he was sure he didn't tell anyone else of it, either.

Kari tried to smile, probably at the futile attempts of Kira to make her relax. "I'm sure that he will." With that, her eyes sharpened into daggers. "What were you planning to do?"

"Err..." the Freedom pilot stammered, looking at Athrun for backup.

"You were going to try it out, weren't you?"

"Well..." Athrun nodded. "Yes, actually."

Kari looked a him, then at the brown-haired boy. "Why?"

"Because I asked them to," said a voice from behind them. It was Yzak, and boy did he look pissed.

"There you are," Kari said pleasantly, her pretty face finally relaxing. She kissed Yzak on the cheek when he approached her. "Where did you go?"

"It doesn't concern you," Yzak snapped. Athrun winced. If he ever talked that way to Cagalli, he knew he was going to get it bad. He blinked in astonishment when Kari only smiled serenely.

"I was worried. I couldn't find you anywhere."

Turning away, Athrun decided to let the couple have their little moment and busied himself with the bulky headgear sitting on one of the MemS. Aside from the fact that yes, he did want to help Yzak with whatever he needed to find out, but at the same time he was genuinely curious. These machines, what did they do?

"Are you sure you want to try this? You know, you might be shocked with what you might see in there," Kira said, once again kneeling by the control panel.

Athrun shrugged. He really was not worried. What was the worst thing he could see in there anyway? "I might as well. I don't see why you get to have all the fun."

"Trust me. It's not fun at all." He chuckled without mirth. "If you go insane, don't say I didn't warn you." He stood up and looked over his shoulder. "Yzak, Kari. We're ready to give it a go."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

"Stop moving, you idiot," Yzak growled as he successfully slammed the ridiculously huge headgear onto Athrun's ridiculously hard head without so much as caring if he'd get hurt or not.

"Ouch! Watch it!" Athrun exclaimed, shifting uneasily in his seat on one of the MemS.

"Stop complaining."

The Justice pilot stared at him weirdly. "My, don't you have a burr in your boxers today."

"Shut up." Yzak was not in the mood for anything that involved humor. Every time he would remember all the hours he had wasted in trying to talk to Kian that led to pretty much nothing but shit, he'd feel his blood pressure rising. It was obvious. Kian knew something.

_But what? Dammit! What!_

Millions and millions of questions had bombarded his mind all throughout the bus trip back to Abashiri, all of which made him madder and madder. None that the crazy guy said made any sense, and if anything, it made him even more insecure than ever.

_Did Kari have a relationship with a Coordinator before, too?_

"Are you sure you want to do this again?" Kari was asking timidly as she strapped the Freedom pilot on the other Memory Simulator.

"I don't see why not." Kira adjusted his helmet and laid back down on the machine, smiling his toothy smile. It made Yzak grind his teeth. He felt like he was being asked to put together a puzzle whose pieces were missing. He hadn't even started, and already he was losing patience.

"Just strap them in and lets get this over with," Yzak barked loudly. Kari nodded at him and sighed.

"Well all right, Kira." With this, she kneeled down in front of the control panel and pressed a few buttons. The machine purred to life. With this done, Kari rose to her feet and took her place next to Yzak, touching his bare arm gently. "Are you all right? You look... angry."

That was another understatement. He shook his head, absentmindedly watching the two Coordinators lying in the machines. "I've had a rough day. I don't – "

" – want to talk about it." She finished for him and shook her head, her hand making its way through his long sleeves, once again playing with his arm hairs. "Fine, Yzak. Let's just talk about something else."

"Like what?"

"Your birthday."

This caught the Duel pilot off guard. Wow, was it August eight already? Well, come to think of it, his birthday never really did bear much importance to him. There was just no point in being grateful then, the fact that you were alive. It mattered little to him that he was alive to begin with... He looked away from those penetrating green eyes of hers. "I don't care about it."

She shrugged. "I care." She thumbed the back of his hand, making him relax a bit. She always did know how to make him relax. "What do you want to do on the eighth?"

"It's a school night. I have classes early the next day. If you want to do something, let's just celebrate on Sunday."

She shook her head. "Our Sunday is booked already."

"What?" Yzak's eyes met hers once again, and he could not help but frown. Those eyes. So much like Kian's. _Dammit! What did he mean by what he said...?_

Kari tilted her head to the right, her strawberry-blond hair covering half of her face. "Yzak, Saturday is Tanabata."

Yzak felt himself getting slightly annoyed. Kari spoke as if that word Tana-something explained everything. Kari seemed to have understood his look and started to explain.

"They say that the night of August seventh is the clearest night of the year. The sky will possess no clouds at all, and the stars will all be visible. There is a legend about that day, you see. They say there is a goddess who lived in the sky, and she fell in love with a mortal man. All year round, they could not see each other because of the clouds, except for Tanabata day, when the sky is clear and the stars are all out." She plucked a bit of lint from Yzak's collar and shrugged. "There are other interpretations of the legend, but this is the version most popular in this region. It doesn't really matter. The story holds little bearing." She leaned her head on his shoulder and said, "I just want to be with you on that night. We can go stargazing..."

And that was more than enough to make all the anger melt from his heart. He did not know how she did it. It was as if her mere presence made his whole body relax.

But of course he wasn't going to freaking admit that to her! He did not even know why the heck he was trying so hard to hide everything from her, when he knew for a fact that she could pretty much sense everything he felt deep down.

Gently resting his temple on top of her head, he breathed deeply, then exhaled in a huff. Everything, absolutely everything felt like it was seeping out of his body from where he touched her. It was then did he decide that he needed to find out the cause of all of these to her... He will not be happy if he didn't get to do so...

"And Yzak?" she murmured after a few minutes of silence.

"Yeah?"

"You won't get answers from my brother... I tried before. So it would be better if you didn't waste your time going all the way to Higashimokoto. You will only tire yourself out."

Yzak swallowed. He need not even ask how she knew that. Somehow, she always knew. He opened his mouth to try to defend himself, when the thing he least expected happened.

In a flash, his body tensed when he saw Kira's body jerk up violently from the machine simultaneously with Athrun's. Kari gasped at the sight of the Freedom pilot ripping off his headgear with a violent roar as he leaped out of the machine as if possessed. Yzak immediately pulled Kari behind him when he saw what Kira did next. Knocking off Athrun's own headgear from his head, Kira grabbed the Justice pilot by the collar, yanked him out of the machine and shook him violently.

"Tell me!" he roared. "Tell me that what I saw in there were nothing more than just memories, Athrun!"

In all honesty, Yzak was expecting Athrun to shove Kira away, demanding that he should calm down. But much to his surprise, Athrun grabbed his best friend's wrists and pried his grip from him, then backed away. "This was not a good idea..." he moaned. Releasing Kira's wrists, he backed away from him, a completely dazed expression in those aqua eyes of his.

Yzak touched Kari's shoulder. "Stay here." He warily approached the two and stopped at a safe distance from both of them. Kira was calming down a bit, his hands running through his think brown hair. Athrun, on the other hand, could not look at anyone's eyes.

_What the heck did you see in there?_

Kira wiped his cheek with the back of his hand, breathed deep, then turned to Yzak. "Once I find out what I saw in there means, I might be able to help you." Then he turned to the blue-black haired boy with uncertain, hurting eyes. "I hope to God, Athrun... those were nothing more than just memories... Because I would not know what to do... if those were real feelings I saw in there..." He turned to leave.

Yzak grabbed his forearm and narrowed his eyes into slits. "What did you see?"

And for the love of him, Kira raised his lavender eyes to meet his blue ones, and for the first time in a long time, he saw it. Kira looked... insecure... "Ask him. I'm going home, take a bath, and pretend that this day did not happen." He shook his arm free and hastily made his way out of the gym. Yzak was immediately baffled. Slowly, he turned to Athrun, quite a bit frustrated that this was turning out to be another day without any good results.

"What the friggin' heck did you see?"

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_**Yuugiri: Awwww, man! Another cliffie! Let's all kill Yuugiri and make her pay for making us wait for a month before she updated, only to make us wait some more! (angry mob pops out of nowhere) eeep! Uh-oh! Haha! Unfortunately, you can't kill me yet, coz we still have 20 chapters to go. **_

_**Ah, well. This is the update. You will probably hate me for what I have to do, but my crazy mind said I simply have to make a conflict for the ever-perfect AthrunCagalli couple, as requested by a reader! Oops, that's a spoiler!**_

_**Gasp! What did Athrun and Kira see in the MemS? Those evil things!**_

_**Gasp! How will Dearka handle his present situation what with the leech, Fallon, attached to him?**_

_**Gasp! What is the secret behind Karina Takano?**_

_**Complain about this chapter if you must. It's not my favorite chapter either. **_

_**Anyways, I've finally gotten to update my site a bit, and I've uploaded new drawings of mine. Go check it out. Just go to my profile and click on my homepage. New posts include Fallon, Lacus, Cagalli and if you ever did read my one shot HAPPY BIRTHDAY BUNNY, a chibi Kira in a bunny costume is waiting for you in the gallery! XD You can check what's latest there on the homepage such as a new poll about requested one shots... There seem to be a great demand for those... Hmm... Someone even requested fro a KiraCagalli! I was ecstatic! I'd love to do those two sometime! Ah well, I'll let you do the checking. Just do me a favor and sign my guest book! Yuugiri feels loved when left a message! XD**_

_**Ja!**_


	31. Phase 31: Insecurities

_**Yuugiri: Oh dear me! How wonderful you people are! Over 900 reviews! Ureshii! You are simply too kind to me, and here I was, leaving cliffies everywhere! Bad me! Bad me! But truly thank you for bothering to read my work. You guys make writing so much fun for me. See? I updated early, because I felt extremely guilty for doing that to you, what with people crying and cursing about that bad, bad cliffie! (comforts everyone who got upset with cliffie) There, there! Here is the update! It took me till 2 am to finish it... But Ijust couldn't stop...**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam SEED.**_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_She had the silkiest hair that brushed past her shoulders every time she would tilt her head to the side to shyly hide her blushing cheeks when she would catch him looking at her. She was fourteen, as he was fourteen. Of course, the moment he had gotten back from Copernicus, he already knew of her. Who wouldn't? She was the young pop diva who inspired everyone with her songs._

_Her name was Lacus Clyne, and my, did she have the loveliest blue eyes. _

_Simply everything about her was perfect. Her little button nose, the longest lashes he had ever seen on a girl's eyes, her pink locks, her angelic voice. Everything. _

"_For someone who is used to so many people, you sure are shy in front of me," he said, amused, as he leaned forward onto the round table after shoving his empty glass aside._

_Lacus looked up at him, then immediately cast her eyes back down. "It's not everyday you learn you are engaged to someone you hardly know, Mr. Zala."_

"_Please, call me Athrun." He drummed the fingers of his right hand on the table then leaned back. "Your father and mine had been good friends for a long time, you know. So I guess it's something that could have been expected anyway."_

"_I know." She nodded weakly, then sighed. She really was a timid girl when off stage. Or maybe she really did not like him at all. _

_Athrun stared at her dryly. "You know, I shower everyday, so I don't have B.O. And I don't bite."_

_She did not say anything._

_This made Athrun raise his eyebrows in frustration. Looking down at the small box he wanted to give her at the end of this first meeting, and since there really wasn't anything special happening – he had been sure that she would love to talk. This was indeed a surprise – he decided there wasn't else to do but give it to her and get it over with. Grabbing the box, he placed it in the middle of the table and nodded. "Look, you don't have to like me right now. But there really isn't anything we can do about it. Besides, I think you and I will be good friends. Open this. This is for you."_

_That got her attention. Girls always did love gifts. Cautiously, she blinked and reached for the box. But even before she could open it, a pink round object shot out of it, screaming, "HAROOOOOOOOOOOOO!"_

_This made her giggle madly as his pink invention zoomed around and around her pretty head. "Oh, dear me! How cute! Did you make it?"_

"_Yes, I did. I thought you might like a gift to celebrate this day we first met."_

_This made her stop giggling but the happy smile on her face remained. The Haro calmed down and immediately settled with hovering by her left shoulder. "How sweet. Thank you, Athrun..."_

_Dzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzt!_

"_Another one, Athrun?" she asked as a blue Haro zoomed screaming at the top of its lungs. They had become quite close over the year, but never did he see her look so troubled. She was wearing a black dress. She did not look good in black. Her hair that had grown considerably over time was tied back with a plain dark bow, a troubled expression on her lovely face. "You didn't have to bother..."_

_He could only shrug. He didn't know what else to do. He felt so empty inside... "I have too much free time in my hands, I guess. May I sit down?" Lacus guided him to the living room, sat down on the couch and asked him to sit beside her. _

"_I'm so sorry, Athrun... Are you all right?"_

"_I had to keep my mind occupied, or I would have gone crazy."_

_He could feel Lacus inching closer to him, making his heart ache painfully when she placed a hand on his knee. "I'm sorry about your mother..."_

_The dark-haired Coordinator lowered his chin to his chest, willing the tears not to fall. He had been crying so much since morning. He could not believe he still had some left to cry. "Over two hundred thousand people died... I'm sorry I didn't get to come and fetch you for our Valentine's day date... I... didn't even get the chance to call... I... "_

_He did not get a chance to continue with his apology. He found himself wrapped in a warm, comforting embrace._

"_Hush, dear... Hush... Don't talk about it anymore..."_

_He returned her embrace, burying his face to her neck. No tears came, thank the stars. But he did not come here to get hugs, even when he somehow felt a little better with them. Tightening his embrace, he let his lips travel to her ear and said in a hushed whisper. "I came here to tell you, that I am joining ZAFT."_

_The statement both silenced them. But Athrun felt his body stiffen when Lacus pulled away and gently touched her hand to his cheek. And that was it. She never said anything, except for two questions and one request _

"_You will be fighting with them? With the Naturals?"_

"_Yes."_

"_How long will you be gone?"_

"_Seven months."_

_She was silent for a while, then she smiled. "Promise me you'll call."_

"_I promise."_

_Dzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzt!_

"_I have to be going," he said, stopping hesitantly near the front door leading outside and fidgeted from one foot to another as Lacus eyes him curiously. Clearing his throat, he leaned forward a bit, closed his eyes and waited for her to acknowledge his move._

_Startled, she blinked a few times, then leaned forward to kiss her loving fiancée._

_Dzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzt!_

"_What are you fighting for, Athrun Zala, soldier of ZAFT?"_

"_I've met your friend Mr. Yamato. I have to say, I am very fond of him."_

"_Isn't she your fiancé?"_

"_Not anymore."_

"_Why not?"_

"_Coz I'm stupid..."_

"_... stupid... "_

_Dzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzt!_

Athrun groaned in agony as he let himself fall flat on his back in the middle of the shiny floor of the deserted gym, his arms stretched wide on either side of him, one of his legs bent at the knee. Yzak had left him alone in the gym to take Kari to the bus stop. The girl said she was not feeling well, so the Duel pilot, much to Athrun's surprise, was on his feet even before she could protest that she could go home by himself. He nearly carried Kari out of the gym. It was a remarkable sight. Athrun did not even dare point out to him that he was obviously smitten. Else, he knew the light-haired boy would have adamantly denied everything and would most likely result to an uncomfortable silence between them. That had always been the case then, when they were still in the military.

Somehow, he and Yzak never got along that well.

But right now that was the least of his worries.

The moment Yzak had left, he tore through the very limited notes they had about the machine, desperately trying to look for a possible logic to what he had seen in there. Of course the notes were useless... Yet he had started to worry and was extremely bothered by the strange feelings he started to have when he realized that his subconscious started spitting out memories of his former fiancé. Could it be? He didn't have feelings for Lacus anymore, right? He was in love with Cagalli. But if so... then what was this all about?

He cried out, startled when a shadow fell over him and Yzak's upside down face popped into view. As usual he was scowling, the scar on his face making him look so menacing that Athrun winced. Much to his surprise, he did not say anything. Instead the Duel pilot threw something at him that landed squarely on his stomach, making him sit up with a strangled, "Oof!" The offending thing rolled off him and he had to grab at it before it got far away from him. It was a can of cold apple juice.

"You look dead," Yzak muttered as he settled into an Indian position about a few feet from him. Athrun saw he was holding a can of juice as well.

"Thanks. For the juice, I mean."

Yzak shuddered evidently. "Whatever. Now let's talk." Out of his pocket, he flipped open a small notebook and pen. He sat the can of juice near his knee and started to jot down rapidly. "I want you to tell me everything you saw. As in everything. I don't want you skipping important details," he barked.

Athrun could only stare at him for a moment. After that he opened his juice but did not drink it. "Is Kari all right?"

The mere mention of the girl made him frown. "Headache again. They seem to get worse and worse." As if surprised that Athrun had asked him a question and he actually answered, he bared his teeth at the Justice pilot and snarled. "That's really none of your business."

Athrun ignored him. "What does her mom say?"

If anything, this question made Yzak more agitated. He knuckled his temple and lowered his eyes to the ground. "She won't tell me anything. No one is telling me anything I need to know. And now Kari is having these migraines almost everyday... I don't know what's going on. But I intend to find out. Now tell me what you saw in there."

After much awe at Yzak's concern for a Natural girl, Athrun did tell him everything. He skipped no details at all. All the while, he could see Yzak's expression darkening. It was obvious to him what he was thinking. All their hypotheses and analysis were now thrown into the wind.

"Well that explains everything why Kira ran off after trying to stop himself from beating the crap out of you. You were thinking about his girlfriend as if she were still yours."

This made Athrun snort. "I was not thinking about Lacus that way. These were real happenings. Back when we were still engaged. He cannot hold that against me. Lacus and I _were _engaged and nothing can change that."

"What makes me wonder is why Kira overreacted that way even when I know he is very much rational about these things. There is something else you are not telling me."

Athrun felt his face heat up. "What do you mean?"

Yzak eyed him. "When I used the MemS and saw Kira's memories, I simply didn't _see _it. I _felt _it. What did you _feel _when you saw those memories?"

Athrun swallowed hard. He did not know what to say. He didn't want to make a big deal out of anything that he saw in those horrendous machines because he refused to believe that there was anything in those memories that needed to be analyzed. But now that Yzak mentioned it, he did feel something. "I felt... sad... that my relationship with Lacus was a failure. I knew I could have done better. But I never did visit occasionally. I promised her I would call. I never did. There were so many things that I could have done to make that relationship work out... yet I didn't try hard enough."

Yzak was silent for a while as he jotted down some notes. Athrun didn't know why the heck he had to write his feelings down. "Athrun?"

"Yeah?"

"Tell me, honestly. Do you still have feelings for Lacus?"

The question caught him off-guard, because he had asked the same question to himself earlier. He decided not to answer that and covered it up by taking a swig of his juice.

"Coz if you do, I'll break both your arms."

Athrun almost sprayed the mouthful of juice into the floor. "All right. Don't tell me you are going to get mad at me for something I had nothing to do with."

Yzak simply gave him a nasty blue gaze. "This is important. People who matter to you are on the line here. Their feelings are the issue here."

Athrun scoffed. He could not believe Yzakl actually said that. "Don't talk about feelings with me, Yzak. I know more to it than you do."

"Do you still have feelings for Lacus? Yes or no?"

He couldn't believe this! "What does this have to do with your research anyway?"

"A lot. If you tell me the truth, I may be able to point out if this machine doesn't simply take memories and simulate it. Maybe..." Yzak's eyes traveled to the MemS with disgust. "... maybe it exaggerates everything it seeps from the source. Or maybe alters it in some way." He did not let Athrun off the hook easily. "Do you love Lacus or not?"

"Ah, man!" Athrun cried in frustration, wanting to rip his hair out. "Fine, Yzak fine! I love Lacus all right? She is the only person who reminds me of what used to be a happy life when things were simpler for me. She used to be the only reason why I wanted to wake up in the morning and one of the reasons why I joined ZAFT, because I wanted to protect the PLANTs coz she was there. I love her still because she is a friend. Now don't look at me like that. I love her. I'm not _in love _with her! God!"

The Duel pilot blinked a bit before suddenly snapping his notebook shut and grabbing his drink. He opened it and took one huge gulp.

"Argh!" Athrun yelled in frustration slammed the can of apple juice on the floor and fell lying on his back all over again. "I can't change my past, and even if I could, I won't. I love my girlfriend, Yzak. I am in love with Cagalli. And that is all you need to know about that."

Yzak did not say anything, but Athrun could still feel him staring at him with his penetrating eyes. He did not care. He did not think he needed to justify his feelings to be believed. All he needed to know was that he believed in what he said and that was the end of that.

He wasn't in love with Lacus, right?

They stayed there in silence for an hour before Yzak finally deciding to leave. He did not stop him. He stayed there lying on the floor of the gym and let his thoughts wander elsewhere.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Dearka felt his eye twitch involuntarily as he stared at the annoying half-Coordinator leech with as much hatred as he could muster. She smiled up at him with that toothy grin of hers as she nibbled on a green popsicle so contentedly that the Buster pilot wanted to claw her eyes out. What he was afraid of was what she might do to him if he did. He most certainly could not run. He forlornly gazed down at his right wrist. It took him all his self control not to gnaw at the chain bounding him to Fallon.

"You know, you don't have to stare at me that evilly. I already know you hate me."

"That is the understatement of the century." He narrowed his eyes at the girl. He tried to put on his most menacing look ever that used to make everyone up in the PLANTs inch away from him in fright. This seemed to affect Fallon little, if it affected her at all. This made her smile even more. She was either mighty satisfied with her work, or with her popsicle.

"Where did Milly go?" was all she asked him.

He wished she didn't remind him of her. The moment Ms. Wyatt left the orphanage, Miriallia had started acting weird towards him. Every time he would ask her what she was thinking, she would look at him icily in the way she used on him only once before; right before she had tried to drive a blade through his head.

The conversation was not smooth at all.

"_What are you thinking?" Dearka asked her as he grabbed at her arm with his free hand when she tried to move away from him. It was not an easy feat. He had to drag Fallon along with him. _

_Miriallia whirled around so fast that she almost toppled over to him, and she would have too, if he hadn't had a firm grip on her wrist to keep her upright. She snapped her arm back. "What do you want?" She spat out. _

_Dearka had to immediately back away. He had never seen her this upset. Over what, he did not even know. "Nothing. Why won't you talk to me?"_

_She did not answer him at all. Instead, her eyes traveled from his face to Fallon's curious one. She did not look happy at all. _

_Dearka could only sigh, try once more to approach her, but seeing she had backed away once again, he stopped. "Why are you mad at me? Can you please tell me that at least?"_

Of course she did not. She gave them one final deadpanned look, then stormed out of the orphanage without so much as looking back, leaving him in anagrams.

He bared down on Fallow like a hawk. "How the heck should I know where she went? She ran off on me and I couldn't run after her because you chained yourself to me. I hope you are happy."

Fallon blinked several times before narrowing her eyes at him, finishing off her popsicle leisurely. "I don't want to go to Tokyo. I don't want to get shipped off somewhere like livestock."

Dearka personally didn't care. Miriallia was mad at him for some reason, and Fallon was making him miserable as it is. He was about to scream at her some more when someone he least expected to be there suddenly came through the door without even bothering to knock. Yzak's serious face poked through the small crack of the door first, scanned the room and his eyes widened when he saw him.

"I need your – what the hell?" he exclaimed when he saw the chain linking Fallon to his right wrist. "What the hell is going on here?"

Dearka wanted to strangle him. Wasn't it obvious? "She chained herself to me so she won't get shipped off to Tokyo."

Yzak frowned, momentarily distracted. "Then why don't you just wrestle the key out of her."

"I can't."

"Why not?"

The Buster pilot felt faint at the mere memory of the key gliding through the air and unceremoniously disappearing into the water.

Yzak, on the other hand did not seem to care about the details when he told him about the whereabouts of the key. He simply shook his head and said, "I need your help."

"What is it this time?"

"I need you to try the MemS for me."

Dearka stared at him like he had grown antlers. "What?"

"I need you – "

"I know what you said. Yzak," he said in frustration, reached out his hand to gesture but was immediately reminded once again that Fallon was handcuffed to him. He ignored the little brat, who was now poking him with the Popsicle stick in her hand. He lowered his voice, trying to forget that she was there. "Yzak, haven't you had enough playing with fire? Those machines are dangerous. It messes with your mind. It drives you crazy. Look at what happened to Kira!"

But the Duel pilot was persistent. "No. That's the reason why I want you to try it."

"Why?"

Blue eyes met lavender ones, and Dearka felt his skin crawl. He knew that look. It was the look that Yzak reserved when he had an enemy cornered. "Athrun used the MemS, Dearka. He didn't see sad or disturbed memories. He saw happy ones."

Admittedly, Dearka felt his interest pique up and he caught himself falling silent, even the presence of Fallon was temporarily forgotten. "Happy ones? Athrun saw happy memories in those machines?"

"Yes, he did."

Dearka frowned. "How can that be? Kira saw negative memories, and so did you... How come Miriallia and Athrun didn't?"

"That's why I need you to use it. Perhaps if we find the common denominator in the things we see inside it, we might be able to discover what it does."

In truth, the tan boy did not have any objections with helping Yzak as he seldom did ask for help. But one thing was still nagging his brain. "Why are you so intent in deciphering what these machines are for?"

At first he thought Yzak was not going to say anything. He was silent for a few moments before he hid his eyes behind his silvery hair. "I need to see what Kari has in her mind."

"Then why not ask her to use it?"

Yzak's hands clenched into fists, making him shudder at the strong emotions he could sense from his friend. "Because we've tried it many times. The system keeps on booting me out just when I start to breach her memories..."

And they were once again silent, as if both of them were starting to think about what to do next. He despised those machines. He had been so mad at Kira for what he had done to Lacus because of them... those machines, they were up to no good. He looked at Yzak and was about to say no when he heard him utter one word that almost made him fall to the floor.

"Please," Yzak said, unclenching his fists and relaxing a bit. "I need your help."

Who could possibly say no to that? He was about to open his mouth to say yes, when he felt someone clutch his arm tightly. Looking down, he saw Fallon eye Yzak silently.

"I'll do it," she announced.

Yzak could only stare at her, surprised.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

She could not believe it. As she stared in the mirror once more to make sure she was seeing right, all she could do was gawk. Who was this woman standing before her?

"You look wonderful," Lacus said, appearing behind her as she placed both hands on her shoulders and admiring Cagalli through the wide mirror of the parlor.

And for once in her life, Cagalli could only nod at the compliment, instead of her usual protests.

She could not believe it. She actually looked... feminine...

Her long scraggly was shortened ever so slightly, yet it had made a complete difference. The ends that used to stick out everywhere were softened into natural wavy locks that curled over her shoulders, and the warm rinse made her hair positively shine. Her bangs that used to fall over her eyes were tamed and they looped just above her lashes, softening her almost hard face, framing her huge hazel eyes. She had never ever noticed her eyes before. But right now, it looked like they were jumping out of her face.

For once in her life, she felt... beautiful... It was a miracle how her hair changed everything.

Just then, she felt laughter bubble up her throat and she giggled. Giggled! "Wow..."

Lacus smiled satisfactorily, and squeezed her shoulders affectionately. "Athrun will be so pleased to see you. He won't be able to get his eyes off of you."

The thought of Athrun looking at her made her feel a little giddy. She had not felt so excited to see him before! "I can't believe it. I look like a girl. Do you know how many times people actually thought I was a boy?"

This made Lacus giggle. "It kind of makes it different now, doesn't it? Having a man in your life sort of makes you feel a little more feminine than usual. Don't you think so?"

"I haven't really noticed..." she said. Digging inside her backpack as they made their way to the counter to pay, she sighed. "I have a lot to learn."

The songstress turned to her with smiling eyes as they exited the parlor and started to walk down the sidewalk. "You have always been so tough and strong Cagalli. Maybe, just maybe, you'd allow yourself to be a damsel in distress for once."

The remark made Cagalli think as they made their way downtown. Lacus, she knew was going back to the A.U library to drop off a book she was supposed to return earlier, but had completely forgotten because she had been so excited for Cagalli's trim.

Lacus took a few hurried steps ahead of her, slinging her tote bag over her shoulder, then whirled around with a smile. She was always smiling. "Listen, I'll go on ahead and I'll met you in the RQ later, all right? If you see Kira, can you tell him to call me later?"

Cagalli tilted her head to the side, then nodded. "Sure."

"Thanks," Lacus said, and Cagalli watched as Lacus hurried away down the alley, a spring to her step, her long, glossy pink hair flowing behind her as she disappeared in a corner. She really was an attractive girl, Lacus. She knew that if she were not her friend at all, she would have been insecure of her, given that she and Athrun did have a relationship then.

She frowned. Come to think of it, she already was feeling a bit insecure. Heck! She allowed herself to be convinced to try extra hard to be pretty. What else could she be but insecure? She shrugged a bit and went her way, deciding to pass through the park as it was a nice afternoon that promised a cool night.

That was when she saw Kira stalking through the park as if he was off to go to war. She suddenly felt worried. She hated it when Kira looked all agitated. Hurrying her steps, she called out.

The moment her twin turned around to look at her, she was immensely pleased to see his lavender eyes widen in appreciation. "Aww, Cagalli! You look beautiful!"

Of course she was not willing to admit that she positively glowed inside from his compliment, so she punched him playfully on the shoulder. "No one likes a kiss-up, Kira."

He laughed a bit, then tugged at a curly strand of her blond hair gently. "I'm not kissing up. I'm telling the truth. You look really nice today."

She felt her cheeks warm up and she hurriedly hid it behind a frown. "Well, I should. I paid good money to look pretty. It would be a great disappointment if I were to look less cute than before I went inside that parlor."

Kira simply laughed as they started to walk side by side through the park. "Lacus convinced you, huh?"

"Yeah she did. I don't mind. I don't mind a bit of pampering myself, you know. She went to return an overdue book to the library and she said that you should call her later."

After this, Kira was silent, making Cagalli look at him in the corner of her eye. Deciding that perhaps her butting into his apparent silent retreat would be a bad idea, she decided to change the subject. Besides, she was really curious to know.

"Have you seen Athrun? He was with you and Yzak, right?"

If anything, however, Kira's mood darkened even more. "I left him in the gym with Yzak. Maybe he is still there. I don't know."

This was not Kira at all. Seldom did Kira and Athrun talk lately, but when they did, they were always boisterously laughing about some secret joke when they were still in Copernicus. She clutched his arm gently. "Hey, are you all right?"

Kira looked down at her with expressionless eyes. He did this for about a few seconds too long, before tearing his gaze away from her face. "I'm fine. I'll walk you to your dorm."

And that was it. They walked in silence through the park with Cagalli's mind reeling. What the heck happened? She tugged at her brother's sleeve, dread nagging at her heart. "Kira? You didn't use the MemS again, did you?"

And she could feel the muscles in Kira's arm coil tightly. "I used it again. Athrun did, too."

She gasped, suddenly making her nervous. Those machines. They were no good. God, she wished Athrun was all right. "What did you see? Were you able to sort things out?"

"No," Kira snapped uncharacteristically.

This annoyed Cagalli to no end. She pulled at Kira's arm hard, making him stop walking. "All right, that's enough. What did you see in there?"

In an instant, Kira's face paled, and worry crossed him round eyes. Cagalli took a step forward. "Did you see any of the things you saw before in there, Kira?" she asked softly. "Did you see... " she hesitated a bit before continuing. "Did you see Fllay again?"

The question, instead of the reaction Cagalli was expecting from him, made Kira blink. And Cagalli could swear, she could hear the wheels in Kira's head moving. For a split second, he looked utterly lost, and then his eyes lit up in excitement.

"By the gods, Cagalli, I've figured it out..." he whispered, his hands falling limply to his side. He looked at her with that wide-eyed expression and his hand shot out and took her by the wrist. "Let's go back to the school. I think I know what the heck that machine does."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

She had overreacted, she knew it. And she knew that it was not his fault. But still, she could not blame anybody else. It was not Fallon's fault that she liked Dearka that much. And it was not Dearka's fault either. But that was the worst part of it. She did not know who else to blame for her jealousy.

Grabbing a carton of milk from the aisle and tossing it into her cart, she sighed and looked down at the list in her hand. It had been the greatest excuse to leave the orphanage. It was her turn to do the grocery shopping that day, and so she had made use of it to make her getaway. It was driving her insane, the fact that there was no way to disengage Fallon from her boyfriend. She did not know why it suddenly bothered her. It never bothered her before. She wondered why it did now.

Huffing angrily as she tossed a can of baby corn into her cart, she wheeled it around and started for the processed meat section. She hated the feeling, jealousy. It was nothing like hate or annoyance. As those feelings were pretty much influenced by other people, jealousy was simply an emotion spawning from her own intolerance of rivalry. Jealousy was something that you yourself caused because of insecurity, therefore she knew she had no one else to blame but herself. Perhaps that was why she felt so helpless. She really did not know who else to blame...

Angrily, she drove her cart down the aisle so fast that she almost ran over someone when she turned the corner. The moment she saw who it was, she secretly wished that she did run him over.

It was none other than Yalin. And oh boy, was he ever flashing his ever-perfect smile.

"Where's the fire?" he asked humorously as he easily guided her cart to the side to let a customer pass. "You know you could have hurt yourself that way, or hurt others."

Well that was true, but Miriallia really was not in the mood to listen to him talk. Mildly distracted by the fact that it had been quite a while since she actually had seen him, she shrugged. "I was a little preoccupied. I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about it. Wow, you looked pissed."

Miriallia shot him an evil look, and felt suddenly guilty when he awkwardly looked away. He was really a nice guy, in an unbiased opinion, even with the fact that he tried to make a move on Lacus. In all honesty, looking at him with an objective eye, he was truly an all right person. He had saved them before from a tight predicament they were in and it seemed like he had stopped pursuing Lacus ever since Kira had stepped into the picture.

She shook her head and leaned her arms on the cart. "I'm sorry. I've had a rough day."

"Ah, I'm sorry to hear that. Are you all right?"

"Can you dive into Abashiri Lake for me and retrieve something?" she murmured.

"What was that?"

"Nothing. I was mumbling rubbish." She looked over her shoulder and sighed. "So what's up?"

"Nothing much." He fidgeted in his place, as if searching for something to say. "So, your friend Kira and Lacus are going out, I've heard."

How did she know that he was going to ask about her? Shaking her head, she started to wheel her cart away. "Come off it, Yalin. Lacus is taken. Take the hint and bug off."

"Hey wait!" Yalin stopped the wheels of her cart with his feet, earning a scowl from Miriallia who really was not in the mood for this. "I was just asking. It's not like I'm going to do anything out of it."

"Good. Because if you know what's good for you, you'd stay away from Lacus. Or Kira will beat you up into a bloody mess if you don't."

"I don't have any arguments there."

"Good."

Yalin stared at her dryly. "Why are you being so defensive? I was just making small talk."

"Because I don't trust you..."

He sized her up a bit. "And may I know exactly why you don't?"

This made Miriallia blush. Why did she hate him so much? Lowering her voice she mumbled. "You smile too much. It makes me suspicious."

This made the gray-eyed boy stare at her briefly before bursting into a fit of laughter. "You hate me because I smile a lot?"

It did sound ridiculous. But it was the truth. Every time he smiled, Miriallia felt like he was charming someone. But come to think of it, it was not his fault if he was naturally handsome that way, and that he had a nice set of teeth. "Kind of."

"Isn't that a bit unfair?"

"Well, you asked me why I hated you. I told you the answer."

He only shook his head ruefully. "Would you rather have it that I had ugly teeth and smiled a lot? That would be a bit disturbing, don't you think?" He grinned at her, and for some weird reason Miriallia smiled back. He really wasn't such a bad guy.

"One more reason why I hated you is that you kept on pursuing Lacus."

This made his grin disappear, and his handsome face darkened a bit. He busied himself with arranging the aisle of canned dog food. "It wasn't my fault, either. She really is pretty."

"And taken," she muttered flatly.

Yalin smiled again. At least it had stopped annoying her, that smile. "So I heard. Your friend with the silver hair, Yzak was it? He kind of told me that."

Miriallia narrowed her eyes at him. "What do you mean?"

"I sort of tried to ask Lacus out again earlier. Now don't look at me like that! I kind of knew she wouldn't come." He shrugged a bit, then looked over to her. "She is in love, and I guess there wasn't anything I could do. I was just trying my luck. Don't worry. I'll stay away."

She sniffed. "Good. Now that that is settled, we may be civil finally." She looked back down at her list and sighed. "Now where are the detergents?"

"Aisle five. I'll walk you there."

Miriallia found herself getting led to the detergent section and felt like finally she was starting to respect the guy. It was not his fault he liked Lacus. And it did take a lot of guts to let go of an inkling even when he knew in himself that it was still there. Perhaps she and Yalin could actually be friends.

"So tell me," he started.

"Yeah?"

"What's in the bottom of Abashiri Lake?"

_Ack!_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Lacus rushed out of the library steps in a hurry and passed through the soccer field, amused by her long shadow caused by the setting sun, bathing the deserted campus into a wonderful shade of oranges and reds. She decided that maybe it would be nice to drop by the orphanage and visit little Eiko, Dearka and Miriallia. Passing by the gym, which she found to be open, she peered inside and was surprised to see someone lying on the floor in the middle of the empty place. Suddenly alarmed, instantly thinking that someone was hurt, she rushed in and gasped when she saw it was Athrun. He opened his eyes the moment she peered over him. He did not say anything, but she could have sworn there was a look of panic in his face when saw her.

"Gosh you scared me. I thought someone was hurt so I came in. What are you doing here all alone? I thought you were with Kira and Yzak?"

Athrun swung his head from side to side, but did not move from his place on the floor. "They left. I don't know where they went."

Lacus looked around uncertainly, cringing when she saw the bulky machines not too far away, then she bent her knees and sat on the floor next to Athrun, arranging her skirt over her legs properly. "Shouldn't you be heading back to the dorms?" she asked.

Athrun stared straight ahead into the high ceiling. "Maybe later. After a few minutes." He looked over to her. "What are you doing here all alone?"

She smiled and started to draw lazy circles on the shiny floor. "I returned a book to the library and was supposed to go and visit the orphanage when I saw you." She nudged his leg gently. "Guess what?"

"What?"

"Cagalli had her hair cut today."

Athrun blinked several times in rapid succession and stared at her in disbelief. "You don't say."

Lacus frowned. "I thought you would be excited about it. She looks really pretty."

Athrun did not say anything, making Lacus look at him, concerned. Athrun was normally not this insensitive. She touched his knee gingerly, and gasped when the Justice pilot jerked away, as if startled, and he immediately shot up into a sitting position.

"Are you... are you sure you are all right?" she inquired. She examined his face intently. "You look... disturbed somehow."

He looked over to the machines several feet away and his face darkened even more. She had never liked it when he was too serious. He looked... so detached from everything when he was silent and brooding. "Kira and I used the MemS earlier."

Lacus remained silent, waiting for him to elaborate. When he didn't she edged closer to him and asked, "And? Did you figure out what it's for?"

Athrun shook his head. "No. If anything, it added more questions to the long list of questions we have."

The songstress nibbled on her bottom lip nervously. "And Kira? How is Kira? Did he...?" She swallowed hard. "Did Kira see Fllay again?"

"No," the dark-haired Coordinator answered immediately. He picked at the hem of his coat uniform and mumbled something Lacus did not understand.

"What was that?"

Athrun was quiet for a bit. It was funny. He looked like he was really nervous. "Lacus?"

"Yes?"

He stared straight ahead, making sure his eyes did not meet hers. "It had always bothered me... I don't even know why I have to know this... But... " he bowed his head. "Have you ever been happy with me?"

The question caught Lacus off-guard and she was not able to find her tongue for a number of seconds. She smiled uncertainly. "Uhm... what do you mean, Athrun?"

He laughed a bit. "I meant it as I asked it. In our relationship before, was I ever able to make you happy? Even just a bit?"

She was absolutely shocked. She and Athrun had been engaged before, and the engagement was somewhat brought into an unofficial end when the political instability up in the PLANTs occurred. She had never really thought much of it. It was simply something that they had to do then, and so she was not really given the liberty to decide for herself. She touched his knee again, and this time he did not jump. "I was very happy, Athrun. I was happy with you. I always did look forward to your visits, however seldom they were..."

Her reply made his face contort in pain, for a reason she could not understand. Why was Athrun asking these? "I'm so sorry about not being there for you then. I knew that I could have done better. So much better."

She laughed. "Athrun! Why are you being this way? Are you sure you are all right?"

He shook his head. "I don't think I am... Something's bothering me. It's those machines. They are horrible."

Lacus returned her gaze at the MemS sitting innocently away from them. "What did you see in there?"

He opened his mouth to say something, but immediately closed it. After that, he turned back to her. "Lacus?"

"Uhm, yes?"

"Did you... did you ever love me then?"

This made Lacus flush even more. Her eyes darted everywhere as she tried to avoid Athrun's penetrating green gaze. "Uhm. Athrun? Why are you asking of me these things?"

She felt him inch closer to her. "I just want to know. I _need _to know. Please tell me. Did you really ever love me?"

She could remember the first time she met him. He had been a gentleman to her. Yes, she had gotten to like him after a few visits, after a few pints of mint chocolate, after about a dozen multicolored Haros. He was simply too hard to resist. She smiled at him, genuinely. "I was young then and I didn't know what love was, but I had loved you then the way I knew how, Athrun. You were really dear to me. You know that."

This seemed to have made him breathe easier. He smiled back, yet his smile was sad. And the next question that came out of his mouth made Lacus gasp. "What happened to us, Lacus? Whatever happened to us?"

Of course the question was simple. She shrugged, but was getting even more uncomfortable each minute. "We moved on. I have Kira, and you have Cagalli. And we are madly in love with them."

This answer made his face scrunch up nervously. "I have been so stupid, haven't I?"

Lacus merely bowed. "We all have our shares of stupidities. Are you sure you are all right?" She was about to look up at him again, when something came out of nowhere and hit Athrun squarely in the jaw, causing him to tumble back and skid a few feet on the shiny floor. Lacus was on her feet immediately and gasped at the sight of Kira barreling towards the fallen Justice pilot. She watched in horror when she saw Kira grab Athrun by the collar and shook him.

"What exactly are you trying to get at, Athrun?" Kira hissed menacingly.

Athrun avoided his gaze completely. He did not even try to fight back. "I... don't know..."

Kira was not happy with his answer. "I do. Can you tell me honestly, Athrun? For the sake of our friendship, do you still have feelings for Lacus? Make sure you answer right, because I wouldn't know which would make me madder; you trying to tell my girlfriend of your feelings, or you lying to my sister."

Lacus felt faint. This could not possibly be happening. Those machines... Those evil machines... She rushed to the two boys and immediately squeezed between them, pushing Kira off of Athrun. "That is enough, you two. Kira, stop this. You are overreacting."

"No I'm not. I saw it. I _felt _it. I know what these machines do. I felt his _regret_. It all makes sense now. Fllay dying, Yzak shooting down civilians, Athrun loving you. All of it makes sense now. Miriallia's memories did not show up in the machines because she didn't have any regrets at all. She was already over everything then." His eyes narrowed into lavender slits. "And you aren't over her, are you Athrun? Tell me the truth."

Lacus wavered and if it weren't for Kira's chest, she would have collapsed. No, this cannot be happening... Why? She turned to Athrun desperately. "Tell him it's not true, Athrun. Tell him that he's wrong. He's wrong, isn't he?" she pleaded.

But Athrun could only shake his head. He looked up at them and smiled sadly. "I don't know, Lacus. I'm sorry."

"Athrun!" Lacus exclaimed and was about to protest more when a shadow at the entrance of the gym moved and caught her eye. She felt all the blood drain from her face as the silhouette against the setting sun pouring in from the outside gave away who it was.

Oh, no...

The Princess of Orb had her hand on the doorframe as if supporting her to stand properly, her beautiful hair swaying in the breeze as she watched everything unfold before her. And as if in slow motion, Lacus watched as Cagalli swayed a bit, turned on her heel and dashed away out the door so fast that Lacus could not even make out her figure as she ran away.

"Cagalli!" she cried. As if snapping out from a trance, Athrun blinked a few times and looked at Kira then at Lacus.

He looked over his shoulder and whispered under his breath. "Cagalli? Oh, God... " He did not waste any time. Lacus watched him run after the princess, but jumped when he saw three silhouettes enter the gym, one of which grabbed Athrun by the scruff of his neck. Lacus squinted. It was Yzak, Dearka... and Fallon?

"Let me go! Let me go, dammit!" Athrun hissed as Yzak held him tighter. The Duel pilot did not look like he was about to comply. Dearka stared at the drama unfolding in front of him worriedly.

Yzak grunted as he shoved Athrun back in the gym. "Why am I not surprised to know that this little thing you saw in the machines has leaked out already?"

Athrun was not amused. He tried to run once more, but Yzak grabbed him again. "I have to run after Cagalli."

"And if you catch up to her, then what? What are you planning to do? How can you explain to her that you have dormant feelings for your former fiancé who happens to be her friend and her brother's girlfriend? What are you planning to do?" Yzak demanded.

Athrun's face was unreadable. "I have no time for this," he said between gritted teeth. "I need to catch up to her now!" He violently shrugged Yzak's grip and ran out the gym without looking back.

Dearka and Fallon were dumbfounded and Yzak cursed lightly under his breath. Kira was still unmoving as Lacus gripped his coat too tightly that her palms started to hurt.

This was not happening. Those machines... She felt faint... leaning her weight onto Kira's chest, she sagged against him and the Freedom pilot wrapped his arms around her possessively. Burying her face to his shirt, she felt a lone tear trickle down her cheek.

For the first time in so long a time, she was utterly, utterly confused.

Why was falling in love always so complicated?

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_**Yuugiri: Oh, my, my. Isn't this a miracle! I updated EARLY! But then what is this? Ah! The typical how-to-deal situation people have with ex-lovers! How annoying! Let us all grab a torch and chase Yuugiri around, angry-mob style. Don't forget the pitchforks. **_

_**I really am sorry about this. I was starting to think the CagalliAthrun parts have become so dull and boring because they are always in good terms. And besides, Athrun and Lacus had never really justified their official break up then, so I just thought that maybe it would be nice to tackle a bit of it. Please don't kill me. I know that it isn't much, but the Yuu has been trying really hard to update faster. So far, I have a good grip of what's to happen in the next chapters, as well as the ending. And yeah no fluff here, none at all. But the plot must advance. **_

_**Fallon is finally using the MemS. Hmm. Interesting. Wonder what will happen? **_

_**And where the heck is Kari?**_

_**Well, till next update! Ja!**_


	32. Phase 32: And Everything Was Good

**_Yuugiri: Ah, I know that the past chappie was another cliffie, but I really had no choice! XD Now, this chapter will not necessarily advance the plot, but I kind of want to develop the characters a bit. I do not know what Athrun really felt about Lacus then, and vice versa, but I would like to interpret it this way. I may be wrong, actually, but I love Athrun and Cagalli so much and Lacus and Kira, that I want to imagine their feelings like this. I hope you understand._**

_**Well, please do read on!**_

_**Disclaimer: I think by now you know that I don't own Gundam SEED...**_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

By the time Athrun managed to stumble out of the gym, it was too late. Cagalli was nowhere to be found. The broad, deserted Soccer field held no trace of the blond princess or even where she went. She was merely gone. Athrun had not known she could move that fast. Apparently she did, and he did not know what to do next. He squinted in the orange light of the setting sun, hoping against hope to find her somewhere... He failed miserably.

Slumping on the low steps of the gym, he felt his insides freeze at the realization of what had just happened. Cagalli had heard everything. Right now he did not know if the reason that it was making him miserable was the fact that everything Kira had accused him of were true. Did he still have feelings for Lacus?

He was feeling sick, burying his face in his hands. "Kill me now, Lord..." he moaned in agony, completely lost. Could it possibly be that you love two people at once? He smashed the mere thought to the ground. It was such an outrageous thought! How could a person possibly love two people at the same time?

Right now, he did not bother to ponder about that question. He felt someone approach from behind him.

"You know, you could do something more productive by getting off your ass and looking for her." It was Dearka's voice.

Athrun looked over his shoulder and shook his head, ignoring completely the handcuffs on the Buster pilot's wrist. "Where shall I look? She's gone. I don't know where."

This time, Yzak stepped out of the gym too. He looked utterly disgusted when his blue gaze landed on him. "It would be more helpful if you started looking. Get up and move."

He so wanted to. He so wanted to run off and find her, but even if he did, he wouldn't know what to say. He himself was confused at what he was feeling. What good will it do to tell her things he himself was not sure of? He shook his head, wishing they would leave him alone. "Please, just let me think for a bit." He buried his face back in his hands.

Just then, he heard loud curses from behind him, and a lot of scuffling from inside the gym. He immediately looked back inside and saw Lacus trying to restrain a wild Kira.

"Athrun!" Kira screamed angrily. Athrun had to wince. He had never seen Kira like this. Ever. Usually the calm and very meek boy he had known since forever was now red in the face and trying to get to him. If it weren't for Lacus, who had her arm around his waist and protesting piteously at him, he would have charged at him again and beat the heck out of him, and Athrun knew he would not dare fight back. Why? Because he was afraid that what Kira was saying was true.

Dearka looked completely lost. Athrun looked up at him as he slowly got to his feet, backing away from them to make sure no one was going to jump at him from behind. Yzak was still glaring at him in disbelief and disgust. Fallon was hiding behind the Buster Pilot, also looking frightened.

"Look, man," the tan boy started as he tried to take a step forward, but was hindered by his excess baggage. A crossed look marked his face at the remembrance that Fallon was still there, but he continued anyway. "I think it's best you just go. You know, just... " he looked over his shoulder to a slightly calmer Kira. "... just go somewhere else."

Athrun was about to open his mouth but was automatically stopped by a very uncharacteristically cold voice.

"No," Lacus snapped. She was now standing quite stiffly. She looked... angry, her tear-stained face was slightly flushed as she kept a firm hand on an uncertain Freedom pilot, and her lips were in a straight line. _Never _had Athrun seen her like this.

Yzak was slightly amused. He slowly backed away and proceeded to the MemS as if nothing was happening. It was wise of him. He obviously did not want to do anything with whatever that made Lacus mad. Dearka looked at Athrun to Kira to Lacus, then started towards Yzak, dragging a trembling Fallon behind him. Even as he reached Yzak's side, Athrun could still feel him looking at them curiously.

"You two will have to grow up," Lacus said coldly, making even Kira freeze in his place. "I will have none of this childish behavior from any of you. Cagalli is hurting out there somewhere because of your foolish insecurities and I will not have it! So if none of you are going to look for her, I will." With this she stormed out of the gym in an un-Lacus like stance. Kira ran after her and tried to stop her, grabbing her by the wrist by the time she had swept past Athrun, who merely stared at her at a loss.

"Lacus wait – " Kira said but was instantly interrupted by Lacus.

"No, I don't want to talk to you just now, Kira. Come to think of it, I don't want to talk to either of you while Cagalli is not here." She flashed Athrun a pained look, as if she herself could not believe this was happening. She returned her eyes back to Kira, her voice softening a bit, somehow making Athrun look away at the way she gazed up at the Freedom pilot the way she used to gaze up at him before. "Fix this, please. This should not be happening to good friends... " With that, she touched Kira's face gently and hurried away, her pony tail trailing behind her as she stalked across the soccer field, hesitating a bit in the middle of it as if deciding which way to go, then ran off to the direction of the bus stop.

Athrun could only watch as she disappeared out of their sight. For a moment, he wondered what the heck just happened to her. She had never been so upset like that before. And it made him worry. But right now, that was really something he did not have to worry about. Right now, he needed to find himself... He did not understand what was happening inside of his heart at the moment.

"Athrun," Kira suddenly spoke, making him jump. Instinctively backing away from the Freedom pilot, he narrowed his eyes at him as if anticipating another blow. None came.

In fact, Kira looked a bit resigned. No hostility in those eyes now, unlike earlier. The next thing that came out of his mouth was probably the wisest thing that ever grazed his lips. "I think we should just not talk about this for the time being. I'm too confused to think about anything right now." With that, he started to walk away as if in a trance.

Athrun could not agree more. He turned on his heel and proceeded to the other direction, not really knowing where to go.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

She ran. She ran all the way from the campus, blindly storming through anything and anyone she cam across to, ignoring curses coming from them. But there was one thing she was proud of, regardless of the way she fled from the gym; she was not crying, even when she knew she wanted to.

But right now, as her legs finally started to get tired, she asked herself why she ran in the first place. Was it out of anger? Fear? Jealousy?

No. None of those.

It was confusion. She simply could not understand what was happening. Athrun... and Lacus...?

She finally felt her sides hurting and her body told her to stop. She panted and looked around the place her legs had carried her. She discovered she was back to the park where she had met up with Kira earlier. Her mind was spinning as she fell on her behind on the stone bench sitting in the middle of the empty park, trying to analyze whatever she had heard back there in the gym.

Kira saw it. _Felt _it. There had to be something behind his anger then. Could it be that her twin really saw it? Did Athrun really still have feelings for the songstress?

She touched her hand to her forehead, slightly feeling faint. Maybe running away had been a bad idea. Maybe she should have stayed, confronted Athrun about it. Maybe she should have asked.

But she was too afraid. Closing her eyes, she could remember that day up in space when the Archangel and the Kusanagi had rendezvoused with the Eternal. She had seen Athrun watching Lacus as she cried her heart out to Kira. She could not forget that day. It had been the day when she actually allowed her hopes to get the best of her.

_"Isn't she your fiancé?"_ she had asked.

_"Not anymore," _was his answer then.

_"Why not?"_

And then he had given her the look. She could not forget that look. It had caused her heart to revolt against any sort of logic still in her.

_"Because I am stupid..."_

Cagalli clutched her chest tightly, trying to breathe properly. Why? Why hadn't she tried to read more into he said then? It had been so obvious. He was having regrets. He regretted losing her.

And who would not? Lacus was the embodiment of the perfect female. Sweet, caring, beautiful. She was anything a man could ever hope for.

"Then why?" she asked loudly to no one in particular. "Why did you have to say you love me? Why did you kiss me then?"

It was the eternal question. He had kissed her, embraced her, called her beautiful, helped her carry on, protected her... Was it because he didn't have any other choice now that Lacus loved another?

It was too painful to ponder upon. She tried to stabilize her heart by taking deep breaths, but it seemed as if her body was not responding properly. This was too much for her. But still she did not cry...

She was momentarily distracted when she heard hurried footsteps approach her and stopped a few feet from where she sat. The moment she looked up, she immediately felt faint.

It was Lacus. Cagalli swallowed hard, feeling as if she had seen her for the first time. Her pink locks cascaded down her shoulders in supple waves, her pleated skirt showing off her flawless legs, her uniform hugging her body modestly. She was panting, as if she had been running, yet she showed no trace of sweat. She was absolutely perfect.

"There you are," was all she said, her gentle voice clear as she started to walk towards her.

And Cagalli could only look away. Every time she looked at her, the only thing she could think about was how her looks dulled hers by comparison. No make-over could have helped her from that bitter reality. And even though normal circumstances would have made her loath the woman stealing the attention of the love of her life, she could not bring herself to hate Lacus at all. It was not her fault that she was irresistible.

"Why did you run?" she asked weakly, touching her shoulder with a steady hand. "Athrun tried to run after you."

The words sounded like mockery to her. "Then why isn't he here?"

Lacus hesitated a bit. "Yzak stopped him. And to tell you honestly, that had been wise of him. I don't think he could have done pretty good with trying to explain his side to you, what with both your emotions highly escalated by the events of today."

This did not help Cagalli feel any better. She didn't even know what to say to her. She never had felt so rejected in her life, slightly feeling as if Athrun was playing her as a second fiddle.

Lacus sat down beside her and rested her head on the blond girl's shoulder. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" Cagalli asked uncertainly startled as she started to wring her fingers nervously.

"For everything."

The princess merely shrugged, trying to act calm, but inside she was shaking. They were silent for a moment, before Lacus finally spoke.

"When I first met Athrun, he was as stiff as a board, formal, responsible. He was the perfect military man, ready to run over anything for the sake of his duty. He did everything his father told him, and loved his mother dearly. I met him when I was fourteen, and in the two years we were engaged, he never changed. Formal and as proper as always, we dated when it was convenient for his father's schedule..." she paused before continuing. "Until the Bloody Valentine tragedy happened a year ago."

Cagalli felt her spine freeze at the mention of the incident. She knew Athrun's mother had been one of the many victims of that attack...

"He joined ZAFT, and became one of the top soldiers in the military along with a number of other youths. And because of that, his priorities shifted and we saw each other even less than we did before. I did not mind. I had my career then, and I tried as best I could to sing for the people of PLANT. He was set to the goal of protecting the PLANTs in accord to his father, and so one thing led to another, and we never got the chance to see each other as much." She sighed a sad sigh, and squeezed Cagalli's arm nervously. "In reality, it never brushed my mind about him being away, because no matter what, I knew we were going to get married, simply because it was what our parents wanted. The first time in a long time I've seen Athrun was when Kira returned me to him secretly when I was captured on my way to the memorial service in the anniversary of the Bloody Valentine as a representative."

Cagalli bit her lips, listening to every word she had to say. Remarkably, she was starting to feel a little better, what with her thoughts distracted by her little tale.

She giggled softly. "That was the first time I met Kira as well. He was such a troubled individual when I met him, and there was this one time I caught him crying... "

"He always cried..." Cagalli muttered.

Lacus nodded. "Yes, he always did. Yet I could not help but find him quite fascinating."

"Why is that?"

"Because amid all his tears, he still managed to be strong... And that is what true courage is. Being afraid, but doing the thing you have to do anyway." The songstress nodded her head again. "I found out that he was Athrun's friend way back when, and the fact had startled me to no end. Athrun rescued me, of course. And indeed, I was happy to see him, yet I could not help but feel he did it out of duty. He would have rescued me whether or not we were engaged. Come to think of it, our mere engagement was a duty..." she laughed at that. "It mattered little to me, until I met Kira one more time when he was brought to me up in the PLANTs to nurse back to health. And according to Athrun, you had rescued him pretty much at the same time Kira was with me." Pulling away, she faced her. "It's funny, how our lives seemed to be intertwined somehow. They came to our lives at the moment we needed someone to save us from ourselves. Aren't we lucky? Having them here?"

This time Cagalli shook he head. "Lacus, Athrun... he still has feelings for you... doesn't he?"

Lacus laughed merrily, brushing aside the comment as if it were a fly. "Oh, dear no Cagalli. There were no feelings to begin with. The only bond we shared between each other was a responsibility to fulfill what our parents wanted of us then. Athrun will forever be a special person to me, someone who keeps me in touch with my past, but not my future. My future is with Kira."

Once again, Cagalli's heart contracted. "Then why was he like that to you earlier in the gym?"

This time, Lacus could only frown. "The same answer to why Kira was like that about Fllay. The MemS that Kari had created bring about the regrets from people's memories. They don't necessarily have to be bad memories. Good memories come along as regrets as well, like regretting it was over sooner than anticipated. Athrun, being the responsible soldier that he is regrets our relationship because he thinks it is a duty he did not perform well." She leaned her head back on Cagalli's shoulder. "Please believe in Athrun. He is truly a good person. He did not deceive you. I think Kira simply overreacted about it in his fear of losing something all over again."

Cagalli looked up into the darkening sky and frowned even more. All that Lacus said makes perfect sense. And she somehow did feel a lot lighter. "I had been so insecure of you. I could never be like you... "

She laughed. "You are better than I am, Cagalli. You had in fact broken Athrun's obsessive-compulsive nature of always following the rules even when you had to break them to make things right. You have done him more good that I ever could. And with that I am happy for him. And for you. He has always found you beautiful."

"No he doesn't – "

Lacus pinched her forearm, making her cry out, surprised. "I have never seen him so take before. He could hardly get his hands off you!"

This made Cagalli blush at the remark. Had it been that obvious? "Ah... err... "

The songstress chuckled happily. "Do not be worried, Cagalli. He will have to search himself all over again, the same way Kira searched for himself, and he will come crawling back. He will have to be stupid if he didn't. And I do believe I don't have to tell you to make him struggle a bit?" she closed her eyes naughtily. "Men love a challenge."

This remark made Cagalli chuckle with her. And once again, she felt her heart ten times lighter. "Of course, Lacus. Of course."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Miriallia left the supermarket with a heavy plastic bag and a big wave from Yalin who, much to Miriallia's surprise, was a swell guy after all. She knew she would have contemplated more on the issue had she not been distracted by the last thing she thought she'd see in her life; Athrun was strolling aimlessly from across the street, a dazed look in his aqua green eyes. She had never seen him this... lost... before. Usually focused about anything, Miriallia had to squint to make sure if that dazed blue-black haired boy was really the Justice pilot.

The moment she confirmed that it really was Athrun, she hurried over to him, nearly getting run over by a speeding boy on a bike. She did not care, hauling the heavy plastic bag of groceries along with her, she sprinted and called out to him.

"Athrun! Hey Athrun!"

The Coordinator raised his eyes at him and the dazed look vanished momentarily at the sight of her running to him. He even managed a smile, although it never fooled Miriallia. "Hello there. Where have you gone to?" He immediately reached out and took the plastic bag from her. "This is heavy. Are you shopping alone? Isn't Dearka – " He stopped dead in the middle of his question as if remembering something, then he frowned. "Can you explain to me why Dearka has Fallon chained to him?"

Of course the remembrance of her boyfriend attached to such an aggressive girl made her scowl, making Athrun swallow hard. She hurriedly rushed in with the story of how that came to be, and left Athrun blinking in disbelief.

"A trouble-maker, isn't she? I'm really sorry. Maybe I can have a look at those cuffs later on? We won't want Dearka stuck with her over night. That would be a disaster."

This made Miriallia pale a bit. She hadn't really thought of that possibility, having Dearka spend the night with Fallon. "Please do what you can," she grumbled incoherently as they resumed their walk in silence. She was about to rush through a hallway of paranoia when she suddenly remembered why she approached him in the first place. Looking over to him in the corner of her eye, she asked, "Are you all right? You look pretty out of it."

This question seemed to snap him back into the trance he was in earlier. It was not a normal Athrun thing to do, dazing off. Worriedly, she tapped him on the shoulder ever so slightly, wondering if he was still with her then. He blinked at her touch and he bit his lip. Another un-Athrun like thing to do.

"Say Milly."

"Yeah?"

"Can I ask you a personal question? I mean, a really personal question?"

Slightly unsure of what to say to this, she shrugged a bit. "Well, sure. What is it?"

It took him about a few seconds to gather his thoughts and organize the words he wanted to ask her, but the question, the moment it was out of his mouth, sent Miriallia reeling. "How did you ever get over your past relationship and make your present relationship appear so wonderfully successful?"

Miriallia coughed a few times, having to cover her mouth uncomfortably. "That certainly caught me off-guard."

"I'm sorry," he rushed. "You don't have to answer the question if you don't want to."

She shook her head. "Oh, no that's not what I meant. I was just surprised. I wasn't expecting such a question coming from a boy whose relationship with his girlfriend is pretty much set in stone." And yet again, Athrun's reaction darkened. "Uhm, Athrun? Is there something wrong with Cagalli?"

It was enough to make him talk. One moment he was hesitant, the next he was telling him the events of that afternoon, with the MemS, the things he saw and felt, Kira's unexpected reaction and Cagalli overhearing everything. The thought of it made Miriallia's skin crawl. Everything about the events that had happened was all because of those machines. She wondered why on Earth they ever bothered to use it even after Kira's emotional outburst.

"Where is Cagalli now?" she asked.

Athrun frowned, making his face contort with pain. "Lacus went after her. I wouldn't know what to do if I ever did find her. Right now, I'm just confused. I've never had to deal with anything that concerns this. Perhaps it's harder because Lacus is still my friend...? I don't know..." he turned to her as they continued at a leisurely pace downtown towards the Women's RQ. "How do you do it, Milly? How do you deal with present relationships after having your past ones fail?"

And despite herself, for the love of love, Miriallia could not help but smile at him. She understood him. She understood him perfectly. Folding her arms to her stomach, she looked up at the afternoon sky through the tall buildings of downtown Abashiri. "Okay let me get this straight. Correct me if I'm wrong, though." She looked over at him again. "You are getting confused, because you saw in those machines memories of your feelings for Lacus then. Is that correct?"

He nodded.

"And you are unsure of what you are feeling for Cagalli because of it?"

He was livid. "No, no! I'm sure as anything that I am in love with Cagalli..." he said, then cast his eyes down on the ground. "But then why did I feel that way for Lacus in those machines? Could it be that I am in love with two people?"

She laughed, making Athrun stare at her weirdly. "It's simple to understand, really. Or at least it is to me. That is what's so difficult with falling in love, Athrun. It is one of the greatest gambles people make, because everything is so fleeting when it comes to human emotions. When we love, Athrun, we give a piece of ourselves to the people we love, and they give a piece of themselves in return, even without the security that the relationship will last. And when it does end, that piece..." she touched her chest when she felt a certain something clenching at her heart. "... that piece will stay. Forever. Do you know what I mean?"

He touched his own chest absentmindedly, as if he himself felt what she felt. "I suppose I do. So you're saying... I still do love Lacus?"

She nodded. "You will always love her, as I will always love Tolle, as Kira will always love Fllay, as Lacus will always love you... But not necessarily the way we used to love them before. We simply just do, because no matter what we do, they have been an important part in our lives, people who taught us how to love for the very first time." She smiled, her eyes closing in the process. "I know you love Cagalli. Madly. So personally, I think past relationships kind of prepare us for the real thing, don't you think so?"

It took about a moment to digest but he did eventually nod. In fact he looked a little better. "I think you are right."

"I won't blame you for how you first reacted with your feelings. I have seen Kira react the same way, even worse, after the use of those machines. But I suggest that you find Cagalli and apologize for what she's heard in the gym. Because no matter how much you feel for her, right now I think it's safe to assume that she is hurting."

The slightest hint of Cagalli hurting made the Justice pilot stiffen evidently. He simply nodded then sighed. "I'll have to find a better way to make it up to her." He shyly looked up at her then grinned. "Thank you for helping me put things in perspective. It does seem to make better sense now."

Miriallia could only return his grin as they resumed their walk silently, momentarily diverted from her own problems.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Yzak watched as Dearka stared at Fallon with more than disbelief. "Can you say that again?"

The brat's face reddened and hissed, "I need to go to the bathroom. _Now_."

Dearka looked over to him, and he stared back at him. He had a panicked expression on his dark handsome face, his blond hair nearly hiding the nervous twinkle in his lavender eyes. The Buster pilot looked like he was going to die. "Help me," he snapped.

Yzak's face remained as blank. He jerked his thumb behind him. "The toilet's over there. Hurry it up. I want this to be over as fast as possible. Heck, we don't even need to let you try this on since I think what Yamato said covers everything. But I don't want to take chances." Of course, he did not dare give them the reason why he was in a hurry. The moment Kira had blurted out his theory on the MemS, he could not contain himself anymore. He just had to tell Kari of it tonight. But aside from that, he didn't want to admit to anyone that he just wanted to see her tonight. He knew it was pathetic. Yet his heart was aching to see her terribly. Lately, he had wanted to be around her too much for his own good, yet having her close to him had a strange effect on him. He was... relaxed.

Dearka glared daggers at him before finally getting up on his feet dragging along a very uncomfortable Fallon with him. "This is all your fault, you little brat." Yzak watched as his friend tugged at her to follow and they disappeared behind the divider leading to the back gym where the rest rooms were. Yzak could hear Dearka cursing away. He zoned everything out and sighed. What a day. Everything was getting all screwed up for some weird reason. Was this Fortune's idea of a joke on them all? If so, it was not funny.

Everything right now was good enough to make even him cry.

He snorted as he stood up from the floor of the gym and dusted his behind. Heck, he could not wait any longer. He wanted to see her. Looking over his shoulder to where Dearka was accompanying Fallon, he was about to rush out of the gym when Kira walked in.

"I thought you left," Yzak said as he watched the Freedom pilot hesitate a bit by the door of the gym.

"I didn't know where to go. I kind of feel... I don't know. I feel funny."

Yzak snorted. He should! "Could it be you are feeling guilty?"

Kira stared at him cautiously, then looked at his feet. "I overreacted, didn't I?"

"Not at all. You reacted exactly as I would have reacted if anyone even dared get close to what belonged to me. You merely struck me as a hypocrite that way, though."

He narrowed his eyes at him. "... What do you mean?"

"What I mean is, you pretty much reacted the same way when you used these machines. I don't see the reason why you were so mad at Athrun simply because you saw something in there that could possibly have been a misunderstood memory of something that he and Lacus shared."

This made Kira shut up. Now in reality, perhaps if this had happened a few months ago, Yzak wouldn't care any less. But for some weird reason, having spent this long a time with people he never really thought he would care for, he was starting to look out for their best interests no matter how much he denied it.

When Kira still did not say anything, Yzak cocked his head back to size him up. "You have a friendship not even a war could prevent, and now you're letting it all go down the drain because of some misleading machine about a girl whose heart obviously belongs to you completely. I think you are better than that. Far better."

Kira ended up scratching his head sheepishly. "I didn't know what got into me."

"Insecurity, I suppose. I don't really care what it was. Just fix it for everyone else's sake. And your own."

This earned him a strange look from the brown-haired boy. "You are starting to be the only one who is making sense at the moment. If I didn't know you any better, I'd have thought you weren't really Yzak."

The Duel pilot snarled at him. "Get out of my face, Yamato!" Kira jumped and dashed out of the gym with a strangled laugh.

Yzak waited for a moment, trying to catch his breath before also walking out of the gym, not being able to hold it back. He needed to see Kari, even when it meant leaving Dearka stuck in the girl's bathroom with the little Fallon witch.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

This has got to be the most embarrassing thing he had ever done in his life. There he was, standing outside the half-open door of a cubicle in the deserted girl's comfort room, his arm stuck inside while Fallon was doing her business. All the while Dearka felt like the biggest loser in the world. Everything was not going right today, and Miriallia mad at him for some reason was not helping him at all.

"Are you done yet?" Dearka muttered.

"Oh, please excuse me. It's very hard to button up my pants with one hand," came her sarcastic reply.

Dearka's face brightened even more. This was not happening... "Hurry up. This is not as comfortable as you might think it is for me."

"Neither is it for me."

"Ah, and I wonder whose fault is that?"

Silence.

He heard a flush, and more struggles and finally Fallon was out of the cubicle. Man, that was one of the silliest things that had ever happened to him. He stared at Fallon dryly. "You know for someone who hates Coordinators, I don't see the reason why you chained yourself to me at all. You could have chained yourself to Miriallia. Not that I would like that at all either."

That earned him a blush, but he disregarded this as one of her ploys for him to stop him from ratting her out. She sniffed. "I was wondering, are all of you Coordinators as dense as you are?"

"You speak as if you know a lot of us."

Her face paled a bit. "I know enough." And she was about to march out of there in a hurry, but Dearka stood his ground. He's had enough of this already. For some reason he knew that this hatred had something more to do than the war itself.

"All right. I've had enough of your uncalled for behavior." He tugged at his wrist and Fallon nearly stumbled against him. She regained her balance on his chest and backed away from him. "Tell me what it is that I have done to deserve this. Once I know what I did, then I will be more than happy to accept whatever you throw at me." God, lately no one was telling him what he has done to make them mad at him. It must be that time of the month.

Fallon glared at him from under her eyelashes, and Dearka could swear he finally saw something that made her look close to pretty. She had nice green eyes. "You could go to hell and back and you won't be getting anything out of me."

Dearka let out a frustrated sigh as he leaned his elbow on the near wall. "Sheesh! For someone whose dad was a Coordinator – "

"NEVER MENTION MY FATHER!" she suddenly screamed, making Dearka almost back away in confusion and surprise. She narrowed her eyes into slits and her mouth thinned into one straight line. "He doesn't even deserve to be remembered! He was an irresponsible jerk who didn't even stand up for his family! And I hate him! And I hate you! I hate all of you!" She slammed a fist on his chest, making Dearka back off against the wall. Yet he barely felt the pain. The shocking revelation of Fallon's hatred had made him numb to the bone. So his hunch was right. This was a personal grudge. But then, why him?

And as if she knew what he was thinking, Fallon smashed her fist against his chest again, but her voice when she spoke was faint. "You remind me so much of him... And I hate you for it!"

"Hate me for what?"

"For being you! Everything about you! Your hair, your attitude. I hate you!" Her face reddened even more. "But I still can't help but feel as if I want to be around you all the time..." She gasped as if she could not believe she just said that, covering her mouth with her free hand.

Dearka looked at her weirdly, unable to understand her. Girls. What complicated creatures. "So you hate your father. So this torture you are giving me, it's a kind of outlet for your bitterness towards him?"

Fallon's eyes widened in disbelief, as if what he just said made no sense at all. "I cannot believe you! You really are dense! Ugh!" She tried to storm away, but sprang back against him because of the cuffs connecting them.

Dearka steadied her a bit, quite annoyed at being called dense for the umteenth time that day. "You know what, you are starting to bug me. I will not have it. Whatever happened with your father has nothing to do with me so let me get on with my life. My girlfriend is pissed off at me for some reason I don't know and –"

"You are impossible!" she shrieked at him, interrupting his sentence. "She is not mad at you! She is jealous of the fact that you are attached to me!"

This threw Dearka into a loop. Miriallia? Jealous? That cannot be. Miriallia was never jealous. She had teased him of the girls she claims to like to look at him, but never did bat an eyelash at the fact. And now Fallon? She was jealous of a brat? He shook his head. "You're wrong. Miriallia doesn't get jealous."

Fallon snorted. "Oh, my God. You really _are _dense! You can't even detect what your girlfriend is feeling. Now, I'm honestly surprised how you can keep everything together." She planted her free hand on her hips and spat out. "It's because I like you, you dolt! She can tell I like you. And you didn't even know I did! You are such a jerk! I like you!"

As if seeing a snake, Dearka recoiled from her, wanting to disintegrate. Never within the time she had handcuffed herself to him did he have the strongest desire to gnaw at the chains. The Fallon leech liked him!

At that very moment, he wanted to die.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Yzak felt his heart flutter at the sight of Kari coming out of the front door of her house wearing loose sweatpants and a baby tee. Her hair was held back by a single beret. Her skin looked translucent in the afternoon light, and if it weren't for her rosy cheeks, he really would have thought of her as a sort of ghost clad in cotton.

She moved towards him with the same pace she always moved, placed her hands on his shoulders to tiptoe and plant a fleeting kiss on his lips, making his insides turn into mush.

"I wasn't expecting you to come over. Is there something you need?" she asked, settling down on her feet as she looked up at him expectantly, her eyes once again grazing his face, reading him as usual. He didn't bother to reply. She knew immediately. A frown swept through her pink lips. "It was about Lacus, wasn't it?"

Once again, she amazed him. He nodded, resting his hands on her waist and holding her away from him an inch further. Her scent of what seemed to be lavender was intoxicating him. "I wanted to hand you this." He reached into his pocket where the small notebook he had been keeping notes in was rolled up and stuffed. Kari took it gingerly. "You might want to take a look at this."

Much to his surprise, Kari simply stuffed it at the back of her sweatpants. Normally, she would have savagely prowled through it the moment he handed it to her, but this time, she simply put it away, and, causing all the blood in Yzak's body to shoot up his head, hugged him around the waist, resting her head on his chest. "I've missed you."

Yzak looked left, then right, suddenly too self-conscious to even think of a reply for her. People could be looking. Her mom could be looking! "Hey, get off," he protested, but his hands betrayed him after a few seconds. He merely placed a hand at the small of her back and another one by her shoulder, savoring their closeness and her wonderful scent. But contrary to what he was feeling, he said gruffly, "We were together just s few hours ago. How could you possibly miss me that fast?" Of course he knew the answer to that. The same way he missed her. He felt quite foolish for having to pretend that he didn't miss her, when for all he knew, Kari could already know he was fibbing.

"I just did," she murmured in his shirt, and did not move. They stood there for a moment in silence, making Yzak uncomfortable.

"How is your head?" he asked quietly.

"A bit better. I took a nap."

Silence.

Yzak fidgeted in his place, but Kari still would not let go. He brushed back her hair at the back of her ear and fingered the three silver studs of her lobe. "Good. What are your plans for tonight?"

"Nothing much," she murmured again. "Just to stay here in your arms all night if possible."

Yzak wavered a bit, his face heating up even more. Was this girl for real? He tried to change the subject. "Would you like to do our Art of War homework at the RQ? It's still early. We can get some food and stuff… "

She nodded. "That would be wonderful…" But still she did not look like she had any intentions of moving out of the embrace. If anything, her arms tightened around his torso.

Yzak ground his teeth in annoyance. Not because Kari was hugging her, but because he could not bring himself to hurry her along. He was enjoying her nearness as much as she was. And he damn knew that he hated himself for loving it.

"Well?" he snapped, tapping her back gently. "Get a move on! We don't have all night."

Kari looked up at him, her eyes meeting his as she did so. She had a small smile on her lips. "All right." With that, she was on her toes once more and she kissed Yzak again, this time with more pressure than he would have anticipated. She backed away from him and hurried back inside.

Yzak had to control himself from snatching her back to him. Man, he was a wreck. This girl was not doing him any good. If anything, she was driving him crazy.

_But I'm frigging loving it._

He touched the tip of is fingers to his lips, then smiled. At the realization that he was smiling idiotically into nothing, he scowled. What a softy he had become…

_Damn it all…_

He was about to sit down on the sidewalk, when in the corner of his eye, he saw something move at the window, the curtain swishing gently as if someone had been looking at them from the inside. Instantly, he felt the hairs at the back of his neck stand on end.

Shaking his head, he scolded himself for being so paranoid. It was probably nothing.

And he sat down on the sidewalk while waiting for Kari to come back out.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_**Yuugiri: Oh, dear me! I did update exactly a week later! The world must be coming to an end. But to my readers, know that I love you all! 1000 reviews! What a shocker! I am truly honored that you take the time to read and actually review my story. Yuugiri feels loved when left a message. **_

_**Anyways, I will try to update as early as I did now. It seems like Summer vacation is giving me a lot of time to work on this story. Work is ridiculously slow. I don't know what to do with my time. **_

**_Till next update! _**


	33. Phase 33: Doubts and Securities

_**Yuugiri: Hell froze over, and Yuugiri updates… XD**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam SEED.**_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_**August 8, A.W**_

"Mr. Zala? Mr. Athrun Zala!"

Athrun felt his head snap up into the air and blinked a couple of times at the sight of the snickering faces of his classmates in Health Education that Monday morning. Had he fallen asleep in the middle of the lesson? Oh, Fortune…

"What the heck are you doing?" Dearka hissed at him from his right. "You are making a complete fool of yourself."

Athrun blinked the sleep from his eyes again and focused his sights on the Buster Pilot's face, then felt his cheeks heat up at the realization that he had – oh, God – fallen asleep in the middle of class. He immediately apologized to Mrs. Takano amid all the giggles from his other classmates and stared at Dearka with narrowed eyes.

"You just had to wait for the teacher to see me, didn't you? Why the heck didn't you wake me up?" he muttered.

Dearka's face reddened a bit, and a snort escaped from his lips as he tried to stifle a laugh. "You looked so adorable, what with your mouth hanging open like that."

His face feeling ten times hotter, Athrun snarled under his breath. "Have you forgotten you still owe me your freedom, you ingrate?" He jerked his thumb at the tan boy's wrist, and sneered.

Sweet success. Dearka fell silent and Athrun's mind drifted back to yesterday. Dearka had come back that afternoon with Fallon still chained to him like a dog. He had just gotten home then, catching Yzak and Kari on the floor studying together.

_"… if I have to break my arm to get her off me!" Dearka screamed. _

_The moment Athrun heard it was the blonde Coordinator, he hurried back out the kitchen and was taken aback at the sight of a flushed Buster pilot, as expected still chained to Fallon, whose face was contorted into a confused frown. Yzak was on his feet too, a bemused expression on his normally bland face. Kari had moved from the floor to the couch, not staring at anything but had her hand to her temple._

_"What's going on here?" Athrun demanded as he watched Dearka yank at the chain adjoining their wrists. He did not have the stamina for this, or the time. But at the sight of the tan boy, he remembered Milly all of a sudden and his promise to take a look at the handcuffs. _

_"My life is dying before my eyes," Dearka grumbled as he yanked at the chain again. "Unless I can get rid of this excess baggage, my short life is ruined."_

_Now, what surprised Athrun the most was not Dearka's childish outburst, but the way Fallon remained silent all the while. She was simply standing there, frowning once in a while as she stared at Kari, then the floor. Kari on the other hand, still had a placid look on her face, yet her fingers were turning white from pressing onto her temple so hard. _

_"Why on Earth did you let her throw away the key in the lake?" Yzak asked, folding his arms across his chest. He looked as if whatever the answer to the question was, it would not matter to him at all._

_Nonetheless, Dearka snarled at him. "I didn't _let _her do it! I didn't know what was happening!" The chain rattled as he shook his fist at him. "No one would want this fate, Jule!"_

_Athrun snorted at them and made his way to Dearka and Fallon in hurried strides. The moment he got this out of the way, he would be able to think about his own problems sooner. He grabbed Dearka's wrist with his left hand and then Fallon's with his right, and raised the cuffs near his face for examination. _

_"What the… ? What the heck – " Dearka protested._

_"Shut up," Athrun said and narrowed his eyes at the cuffs, then sighed at his observation. He let go of Dearka's wrist, then raised Fallon's wrist for Dearka to see. Yzak had also moved forward to see what it was._

_The moment the Duel pilot saw what Athrun was trying to show him, Yzak burst out laughing. It was such a creepy laugh. Dearka paled as he too realized something. _

_Fallon's hand was clenched into a tight fist._

_"Fallon?" Athrun said as he fingered the half-Coordinator's knuckles. "Flex your fingers. This is not funny anymore."_

_Fallon stared at him with an embarrassed look. Then, one by one, she stretched her fingers and Athrun took hold of the cuffs, slowly slipping her slender wrist out of the bracelet. _

_Yzak was having the time of his life. "You asshole! You could have gotten out of those from the very beginning!" _

Athrun snickered.

Dearka was torn between wanting to claw Athrun's eyes and wanting to spontaneously combust. He grumbled a bit and left Athrun be. The Justice pilot scratched his head and looked over his shoulder, and for a split second, his world stopped. There, three seats away from him, staring at him with huge amber eyes, face framed by soft blond ringlets, was none other than Cagalli. His heart skipped a beat at the reminder that she was in the same room with him. God, she was so beautiful to him. He was about to smile when she suddenly turned away from him, and pretended to say something to Lacus, who immediately started getting quite uncomfortable when she saw that the Princess tried to avoid Athrun's gaze.

Athrun shuddered. His whole body ached to speak to her. But for the past forty-eight hours, Cagalli hadn't so much as _wanted _to be found. The thought of it made his chest tighten…

_The moment Athrun got home from the women's RQ after dropping Milly off with her groceries, he went straight back to his dorm, and was instantly surprised when he saw Yzak and Kari sitting on the floor of the living room, lost in their own little world of what appeared to be books about something that looked undeniably boring. When he closed the door behind him, Yzak raised his head and looked over his shoulder and grunted, then went back to what he was doing. This amused Athrun to no end. For the first time, Yzak did not seem to deny his proximity to Kari. _

_In reality, he cared little. He had his own problems to deal with, and it annoyed the heck out of him, seeing the Duel pilot's relationship working out better than his. Considering if he still had a relationship. It seemed like it would take more than the usual begging for Cagalli to actually forgive him. And he could not blame her. He was in deep trouble now. _

_"Did you find her?" came Yzak's voice, once again startling Athrun. He actually sounded like he cared. _

_Athrun shrugged. "I wasn't trying to find her. I know she won't want to see me. I could give her that at least."_

_He earned another grunt from the Duel pilot, but nevertheless, he said nothing more. Kari looked over to him and smiled her small smile. He nodded at her and proceeded to the kitchen. He did not feel like hanging out with anyone right now, especially when they were unconsciously irritating him with their smooth relationship. _

_His thoughts wandered while in the process of getting something to drink. It was a cross between wanting to kick himself and wanting to kick something else. He didn't know what he was to do. Kira was mad at him, and Cagalli showed enough potential to never speak to him again. His heart ached at the memory of seeing her standing there in the entrance of the gym, unmoving. He closed his eyes in the attempt of banishing the thought away. Of all the mistakes he had made in his sixteen years of living, he had never wanted to hurt himself as much as he did now. _

_He groaned in despair as he peered inside the refrigerator and discovered that there wasn't anything in there but a jug water. It was as if fate was punishing him as well. Closing the fridge and slumping against its door, he clenched his fists in frustration. A part of him wanted to run out there and search for Cagalli, but he knew deep down that if he did see her, he would not know the first thing to say. She had been so good to him. He could not even rationalize with himself that he did not mean it. It mattered little if he meant it or not. She was hurt, and he was the cause of it. And that was the end of that. _

Athrun snapped out of his reminiscing when he felt another nudge from his side. Dearka again.

"I suggest you listen more attentively now. Mrs. Takano is looking at you weird again."

That was gonna be hard. Right now, his thoughts were filled with nothing more than Cagalli, who was sitting three seats away from him but felt like three galaxies away.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Yzak looked over his shoulder as he made his way out of the classroom right after Art of War, then felt his heart skip a beat at the sight of Kari waving at him from over the heads of students filing out into the halls, noisily talking and laughing about the stupidest of things. He knew that after yesterday, he was never going to be able to look at her the same way again.

Last night, they had spent the night together lying down on a thick blanket on top of the hill right in the outskirts of town, looking up at the clear night sky. He had never known that he could appreciate stars as much as he did then. He had seen those stars before, much brighter than there on Earth, yet somehow, he found everything more endearing from way down here, in the little planet he had once thought of as the enemy. But perhaps it was because Kari's head was resting comfortably on his chest, while her arm was draped loosely on his stomach while her fingers played with the hairs on his arm.

The moment Kari reached his side, she immediately kissed his cheek fleetingly, then smiled at him. "Happy birthday."

He was taken aback once again at the realizations that it was, in fact, his birthday. Aside from Dearka, Kari was the only one who knew of it. Luckily. He shuddered at the memory of the small going away party Cagalli had arranged for him before. Chocolate cake…

_Ugh_…

"You don't look too happy," Kari stated as she slipped her arm through his and started to lead him down the hall to her locker.

Yzak merely grunted. He knew that Kari was going to be dragging him off somewhere again tonight, but what made him frown more was that he was actually looking forward to it. She always did think of the simplest of things; gazing at the stars, lying down on a blanket on top of the hills.

Once again, green eyes met blue ones as Kari gazed at his face, reading him. Always reading him. He did not believe anyone could make him feel this queasy. "You didn't tell anyone of today, have you?"

He shrugged. "I don't see the reason why they have to know."

She raised her eyebrows skeptically. "Perhaps it's because they want to celebrate the day you were born?"

"Which is completely pointless."

She shook her head. "Nonsense. I for one am grateful you were born to this world." Her grip tightened around his arm, and for a second there, she looked slightly distracted. "I would not know what I would do if I had not met you."

This made Yzak's face redden slightly and he tried to shake her off of him. She would not let go, though, and instead squeezed his arm anxiously. He nervously looked left, then right, afraid that there would be people looking at them. No one was, but still Yzak felt so self-conscious that he wanted to run into heck knows where. "All right, all right. Now let go," he muttered.

He was supposed shake her off more when in the corner of his eye he saw one of his most hated people in this world.

It was Yalin.

The annoyingly handsome boy was walking towards him and Kari, swaying to an unheard of music as he swaggered through the crowded halls. The moment his grey eyes met his, the boy flashed him his perfect smile. His freaking perfect smile…

"Hello there," he greeted as he stopped right next to them. Kari nodded at him in acknowledgement.

"What do you want?" Yzak snarled at him so loudly that it made a few students nearby back off in a hurry.

Yalin automatically raised his hands in defensive mode, eyes widening a bit before finally recovering. "Nothing. I just saw you there and I thought of being civil and greeting you a good – "

"I don't like you. I don't like talking to you. I don't like seeing you. Stay away from Lacus, and stay away from any of the girls." Yzak bared down upon him, and was slightly irritated when the boy did not seem to be the least bit intimidated.

Yalin chuckled silently. "I wonder, if I will ever be able to make you like me at all."

Yzak felt a growl bubble deep in his throat. "The answer is no. I never liked you from the moment I laid eyes on you."

Yalin, much to Yzak's displeasure, turned to Kari instead. "Is he always this angry?"

Kari smiled sweetly. "Always. But I love him to death."

Yzak wanted to fall into a hole.

Yalin laughed richly. "I can tell. Anyway, have you heard the news?"

Kari shook her head, making her hair sway around her shoulders. Yzak wanted to scream at Yalin for ignoring his presence completely and would have done that exactly had he not realized Kari's interest caught by close-up smile boy. And come to think of it, it was quite strange. Yalin had never bothered to come up and talk to them before. And for good reason. Yzak had always been so rude.

"Kian is coming home, I'm surprised Mrs. Takano didn't tell you."

Kari's face, at that moment, changed significantly that Yzak did not know whether to feel uncomfortable or not. This was certainly big news. He remembered the last time he had seen Kari's lunatic brother but a couple of days ago. He did not look at all well, and so he was greatly caught off guard by the news that he was getting released this soon.

"When is he coming home?" Kari asked silently, her head tilting to the right inquiringly.

"Sometime this week I think. That was quite a fast detention, though. I'm shocked." Yzak watched as Yalin nodded at Kari then at him, somehow looking a bit bothered, too. And without another word, he started to walk away. Yzak followed him with his eyes until he finally disappeared in the corner.

It was then did Yzak feel uneasy. Kian was coming home. He didn't know what to make of that. He frowned. It was then did he realize he had quite a lot of people he hated… It was weird. He hadn't really thought of it much, but now that he had… Wow. He did have a lot of people he hated.

A soft tug at his sleeve brought him back down to earth. "Hey," Kari said as she tugged at his sleeve again. "Meet me back up in the hill tonight. I have a surprise for you."

Yzak blinked at her irritably. More surprises. He did not know whether to love her or hate her more. He narrowed his eyes at her. "What is it?"

"If I tell you, it won't be a surprise."

Yzak groaned. "Fine. What time will I fetch you at your house?"

She shook her head. "No, no. Meet me there up in the hill. I'll be there as soon as the first star shows itself in the sky. I promise."

He was never really good at affection, and sometimes he wished he could be better at it, because he knew Kari deserved such. There were so many times he'd wished he could apologize for his coldness, but he could not bring himself to saying sorry.

Kari looked up at him, smiled once more and planted a kiss at the corner of his mouth, making goose bumps do the cha-cha down his arms. She laughed silently. "I forgive you, Yzak."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Miriallia frowned down at her plate of over-cooked macaroni and cheese and sighed. Kira sat across from her in the table they took in the slightly crowded cafeteria that lunch. Cagalli sat to her left, Dearka to her right. It was the most uncomfortable lunch she had ever had since their stay in Japan. Cagalli had been avoiding Athrun for the last two days, and Athrun looked like he was doing the same. Lacus would not talk to both Kira and Athrun, which she could understand quite well. It seemed that both boys had too much male ego for either one to approach the other to make things better. The only thing that was holding Miriallia's sanity was the fact that Dearka was finally free from Fallon's evil clutches.

The thought of Fallon made her frown even more. In the corner of her eye, she could still see the handcuffs dangling from Dearka's wrist. Cagalli had ordered for a new key from Kisaka which will be arriving by express mail anytime within the next two days. The girl, Dearka said, had told her the truth of her feelings, and in all honesty, she did not know what to make of it. Was it right to blame her? After all, it was not hard to like Dearka. He was simply too wonderful not to notice.

"I should shave my head," Cagalli muttered as she pulled at a blond lock of hair over her eye, then blew at it noisily. Miriallia could only shake her head. Cagalli had been going on and on about her hair, seriously fretting about how she looked with it now. It was quite a change. For some reason she had never looked better, yet she was acting like she looked terrible, always self-conscious every time someone looked her way.

"You know it looks good on you, so stop thinking about it too much," Kira said as he leaned back on his chair, staring at the ceiling. He had a blank expression on his face, which had been there ever since Lacus had refused to talk to him unless he had finally patched things up with Athrun. Something it seemed he was not planning to do anytime soon.

Cagalli narrowed her eyes at him, sniffed, then started to fiddle with her hair again.

Dearka shook his head ruefully, then leaned over to Miriallia and blew into her ear, making her jump up and place a hand over the side of her face.

"What was that for?" she asked, staring at him as if he had sprouted horns.

"For not even talking to me for the last twenty minutes." Dearka nudged her arm with his elbow. "Are you okay?"

She raised her eyebrows at him for a moment, then sighed. "Very fine. And you?"

He shrugged, propping his chin on his palm and smiled. "I received an e-mail from my dad last night."

Miriallia almost dropped the fork on her plate. It was very seldom did Dearka ever mention anything about his family. "Oh. Oh, my. What did it say?"

"Nothing much. He was just telling me the usual stuff pretty much like before."

"He's worried about you, isn't he?"

"He scolded me in the e-mail, Miriallia."

This made Miriallia frown more. She looked over to Kira, then to Cagalli. The Freedom pilot was looking at them uncomfortably by then, and the princess of Orb blinked a few times, uncertain. Before she could say anything, though, Cagalli quickly grabbed Kira's arm.

"Kira, I want some yogurt," she declared, pulling a confused Kira to his feet.

Miriallia shot her a grateful look and watched as she dragged her still befuddled twin off of his chair and into the long line of students craving for the only decent food in the cafeteria. As soon as she saw the two disappear, she turned back to Dearka. "Is everything all right?"

He bit his lip, nervously. The last time she had ever seen him this anxious was the time when he had to meet her parents. "It's hard to have a father in the military, Mir. I don't think you would like what he said in the mail."

"Why not?"

His mouth worked wordlessly for a few seconds before finally giving up at the realization that he could not find the right words to say. Instead, he leaned forward and touched her cheek gently. "My father is not like yours. There are things that you won't be able to understand even if I explained to you, so I think it would be better for you not to know."

This upset Miriallia to no end. "Why not?" she asked stubbornly.

This earned her a smile. "Persistent, aren't we?"

She knew she was. She had never really said anything, but she thought about it every waking moment of every single day. She knew that it was not going to be forever, them living there. She knew that sooner or later, Dearka was going back to space. Yet it ate her alive that whatever was going on, he was keeping from her. It made her feel a bit left out, and somehow disturbed that he didn't want to share to her that part of him that involved his family. But nevertheless she nodded. "I'm sorry. Perhaps it is better that I don't find out."

He evidently relaxed. "Good girl. I just don't want you worried, you know. I hope you understand."

Her brows furrowed without even realizing it. "You want me not to worry, but that's kind of hard to avoid." Her eyes met his and he watched him look away slightly before once again looking directly into her eyes. "Are you sure there isn't anything I need to know?"

With this, for the love of him, she saw his eyes twinkle slightly, and he leaned his forehead against hers. "Only that it has nothing to do with whatever you're thinking. I'm sure of it."

Miriallia tried to smile. But she didn't believe him one bit.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Lacus sat comfortably on the patch of grass under the cherry tree right next to the soccer field as she unwrapped her sandwich. As she looked out into the broad expanse of trees and plants and sky, she could not help but remember her time up in the PLANTs, when she would sit in her veranda drinking tea as she listened to chirping birds from the trees. She used to spend hours and hours just idly wasting her time away sitting there while she thought of songs she would sing in her next concert.

Taking a bite out of her sandwich, she set it back inside her small lunch bag, then flipped open the notebook lying on her lap. She felt her heart skip a beat at the memory of those times when she hungered for inspiration. Her life was nothing more than a big inspiration, as she was an inspiration to many. And right now, she was feeling that feeling again; the desire to write something, and although she wasn't sure what to make of it, a song or what, she just felt like she had to write.

Her pen poised at the smooth surface of her notebook, chewing thoughtfully, she almost jumped when she felt someone touch her shoulder gently, crying out a bit. Looking over to the offensive person who snuck up on her, she breathed a sigh of relief to discover that it was only Kira. He was standing about several feet away from her. He must have bolted away from her the moment she jumped up in surprise.

"Oh, dear! You scared me." She watched him, momentarily forgetting that she was not supposed to be talking to him at all. "What are you doing here?"

It was a strange sight, seeing him so shy all over again. The way he held himself, so unsure of what to say, she immediately remembered the first time she had ever seen him. His lavender eyes darted from one place to another, gracing her face one second before suddenly skipping onto something else.

Uneasily, she peered up into his face. "Kira? Are you okay?"

He blinked a few times as if snapping out of his trance, then he quickly searched for words to say. "Oh, uhm, well… You weren't in the cafeteria earlier… I was wondering where you were… So… I went to look for you… and… " his voice faded when he discovered that he was babbling, and he immediately blushed.

Lacus' heart went out to him. Whatever improvement Kira has had over the last few months of their stay in Japan seemed to have reverted after whatever happened with Athrun and him two days ago. Smiling sadly, she moved over and patted the grass next to her. "Come. Sit."

His eyes widened at her invitation. In disbelief, he looked around him as if making sure the invitation was really for him, then hurried towards her clumsily. He plopped down next to her with the grace of a small child.

And they sat there silently.

Lacus stared at him in the corner of her eye.

Kira stared back at her.

Lacus frowned. "Are you okay?"

Kira jumped. "Ahh, yes. Yes." He scratched his head and grinned idiotically. After that, he gestured at the notepad on her lap. "What are you writing?"

"Oh, this?" Lacus tapped her pen on the notebook, then shrugged. "Nothing really. I was just looking for something to do." She didn't take her eyes off of him. "What brings you here? I thought you were eating lunch?"

"I was. Cagalli dragged me away to get yogurt and asked me to fall in line for her. But I got bored because it was such a long line. She pummeled my arm for a minute but eventually let me go. Then I started looking for you," he said, plucking at the grass with his fingers.

The songstress bit her lip. She knew she was not talking to him, yet undeniably, deep down, she was missing him. Unsure of what to do next, she picked up her sandwich and eyed him conspicuously. "Would you, uhm, like some?"

His eyes widened at the offer, then shook his head. "Oh, no. I'm not really hungry."

Just then, Lacus gasped when she heard his tummy growl loudly, making him blush slightly.

The songstress smiled ruefully. "Let's share this sandwich, shall we?" She slipped the sandwich back into its plastic wrapper and pulled out her ruler from her bag. Kira leaned in closer in wonder.

"A ruler?" he asked.

Lacus smiled. "Would you like to see a neat trick?" She lay down the sandwich flat on her notebook.

Kira nodded, quite curious. "What are you doing?"

"My father taught me this when I was nine." She placed the edge of the ruler in between the sandwich and applied a bit of pressure on it. She had loved this trick. The sandwich would always be neatly cut in half. She and her father had always loved sharing sandwiches and burgers this way. Unwrapping the sandwich, she handed Kira the half of it that she had not bitten into yet. "Don't you think it's neat?"

Kira stared at the food she had handed to him, then at her, then back at the sandwich. "I didn't know that." He took it gingerly. "Thank you."

Lacus watched him bite into it ravenously. "How is Cagalli?"

The Coordinator paused in mid-chew, then blinked a few times before smiling. "She cannot get over her hair. Why on Earth did you ask her to go and get her hair done?"

This made Lacus giggle as she placed her half of the sandwich back on her lunch bag. "Because she looks prettier that way."

"Given that, but she seems so uncomfortable with it."

"She will get used to it. She is very pretty."

"I know."

And they were silent.

Lacus did not bother to break the momentary pause between them. She closed her eyes as a cold breeze tickled her ears. She listened to it play with the branch of the tree over her and Kira's silent chewing.

She opened her eyes when she felt a soft touch on her forearm. Looking over to the person sitting next to her, she tilted her head to the side inquiringly.

Kira smiled at her sadly. "I'm sorry. I love you. Please, let's talk about this."

This completely caught her off-guard. Mouth slightly falling open, she immediately recovered and looked away. There was no point in prolonging this. Smiling shyly, she leaned her head on Kira's shoulder. "Let's just sit here instead and not talk. Words, they are the source of misunderstandings. I would like to avoid those as much as possible."

She could feel Kira stiffening next to her. It took him a full minute before he finally relaxed.

And they sat there not saying a word all throughout their lunch break.

And everything was good.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Cagalli grumbled to herself as she looked around for a place to sit. The cafeteria was crowded, Kira had run off somewhere and she did not dare go back to Miriallia and Dearka's table as it seemed like the two were having their own little problem she didn't want to get involved in. In her hand was a cup of strawberry flavored yogurt that tasted like cough syrup.

Today was not a promising day. She had succeeded in avoiding Athrun for the last two days, but now that school was back, it was as if he was everywhere. By the fountain on the way to her Political Science class. Sitting on the staircase next to Contemporary literature. In Health Education.

He was simply _there_.

Now in all honesty, she had felt her heart do cartwheels at the sight of him. He was broodingly handsome, every time he would try to catch her eye, his face contorting as he frowned at her uneasiness and the way she would hurry off somewhere to avoid him. This was not because she was afraid of him, but it was because she was afraid of what he was going to say to her, which she knew she was going to scream back at him whatever words might come out of his insolent mouth.

Scratching at her head violently, she searched the crowded cafeteria for a spot she can deposit herself into. She wished she had not gotten yogurt at all. That way, she could easily slip out of there without having to throw anything away. Right now, she was feeling quite stupid standing there in the middle of the room all by herself. She looked over her shoulder and eyed the trash can longingly. If she hadn't spent a part of her life in the desert, where food was scarce, she would not have passed up the opportunity to chuck whatever was in her hands and make a swift retreat. Shaking her head, she decided that she should at least go into a corner and stay there until someone vacated a table.

When she finally reached the corner, however, she suddenly wished she hadn't.

She came face to face with the person she did not have any desire of seeing.

"Ca- Cagalli?" Athrun stammered, almost spilling the glass of juice in his hand when she nearly collided against him. The princess of Orb was shaken. The only thing keeping her together was the fact that Athrun looked about as nervous to see her as much as she was at seeing him.

Trying to keep a straight face – and failing miserably – Cagalli edged away from him and looked away. "Hello."

It was crazy, how the noise in the room seemed to fade away at his closeness to her. He was not saying anything, yet she knew he was looking at her. She wanted to run out of there. She needed to get out of there _now_.

She could feel her fingers tightening around the cup as she moved to leave, but gasped when she felt fingers firmly grasp her forearm, knocking out the cup in her hand, and causing yogurt to spill everywhere.

A few people cried out loud as they jumped out of the way of the spilt pinkish substance. Cagalli's eyes blazed as she glared at Athrun.

"Let me go," she hissed, trying to pull back her arm from him.

Athrun, for a split second, hesitated, as if considering surrendering to what she wanted, and for that brief moment she felt like sighing in relief. But when she felt his hold on her tightening instead of letting her go, her eyes widened at the sight of his firm and quite intimidating expression.

"No," he said flatly.

Cagalli felt her mouth work wordlessly, searching for the right words to scream at him, but none came out. She felt her face heat up as she saw people look over to them and start to talk in hushed whispers. She tried to shake him off once more, yet the blue-haired Coordinator would not have it.

"Let me go. Now," she snapped loudly, not caring anymore that the number of people gathering around them was growing.

Athrun shook his head. "Not until we talk. You have been avoiding me like I had the plague for the past two days. I know I made a mistake of using those machines, now the least you can do is forgive me."

Cagalli felt blood rise to her head. How dare Athrun start a conversation like this in the middle of a public place! She stepped forward, closer to him as she could possibly be. Much to her dismay, Athrun didn't back away. She didn't care. She poked Athrun's chest with her free hand. "Listen here, you. You _will _let me go _now_, and you _will _stop demanding from me my forgiveness. If you do not let me go, I will make you pay dearly for it."

Now what made this setting quite weird, is that in the past, every time Cagalli would threaten him about the things she could do, the Justice pilot would always back down and do what she said. But right now, it was evidently not working. Athrun slammed the glass of juice on the nearest table, making the occupants of it jump up and scuttle away from the arguing couple, and completely surprised Cagalli when his arm slinked its way around her waist and pulled her against him, crushing her body to his, making the princess of Orb gasp. She knew that Athrun was strong, but he had never showed to her how strong exactly. The last time she had felt this helpless against him was when they first met in that deserted island…

"I want to see you try," he growled.

Cagalli narrowed her eyes at her. "What do you want from me?"

"I want to talk to you. To get this straightened out. Don't you think we are worth it at all?"

This made her bite her lip. She really needed a crash course in relationships. Lacus had said to give Athrun a hard time. She was starting to wonder how her performance is. The thought of Lacus made her stomach churn. She loved her friend, but hated herself for being so insecure of her. She found her mouth spitting words, random sentences, to Athrun she didn't even know she wanted to say.

"What do you want from me? What do you want me to do? Waltz back into your arms and pretend like I didn't hear what you said in the gym? I saw you asking Lacus about your past relationship, and I had seen it in your eyes the regret you felt when you lost her." She tried to shove off of him and was surprised he let her. She ran a hand through her hair in frustration and was tempted to rip it off. "Look at me! I wanted to look pretty for you! I tried to look feminine and for the first time in my life, I actually cared how I was perceived by other people, most especially you. But at the same day, it was rubbed into my face how dull I can be in comparison to other girls."

Athrun stared at her in disbelief, and Cagalli felt the crowd pressing against them. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Dearka and Miriallia fight their way through the wall of bystanders. Miriallia looked over to her questioningly while Dearka eyed Athrun warily. Realizing that they were starting to make a big scene, Cagalli shook her head and sighed. "I'm leaving. I've had enough of this." She turned away and was about to make her swift retreat when Athrun suddenly spoke.

"Is that what you think of yourself? _Dull_?"

Cagalli stopped in mid-stride, then looked over her shoulder. "You know what, Athrun. That's right. Right now, that's what I feel."

Athrun shrugged his shoulders helplessly. "When did I make you feel this?"

That made the princess pause a bit, then she frowned. Was Athrun the reason why she felt this?

The Coordinator looked at her suspiciously. "Are you sure we are talking about the same issue here?"

This made Cagalli fume. "What the heck are you talking about? Of course we are talking about the same issue. It's about your past relationship, idiot."

"Idiot?" he spat out. "Cagalli, if this is about the gym incident, you know what that machine does. It makes you crazy. It misleads your brain. Whatever memories I had then are just that; memories. My feelings for you are real. Now about this issue about you being dull – " he looked utterly confused. "How did I make you feel dull in comparison to other girls?"

This time, Cagalli felt her face heat up. Stupid Athrun! Why did he have to ask her these questions in front of so many people? Stupid nosy people! Why don't they just do their own business and leave them alone?

Cagalli felt Miriallia's arm around her shoulder.

"Athrun, I think it would be better if you talked somewhere else, you know, private? Let's not make a scene here…" Miriallia said.

"No," Athrun said stubbornly, his eyes never leaving Cagalli. That was the only word he used to address Milly, then he directed his words back at Cagalli. "What is this about, huh? All the while you didn't want to talk to me because of something I was not aware of. I tried so hard to apologize to you for the last couple of days for the way I reacted in the gym, and all the while you're mad about something else?"

With this, Cagalli was appalled. "What do you want me to say? I am insecure! I feel so self-conscious because I am not pretty! I am not cute! I am not sexy! I am – "

"Shut up," Athrun snapped.

Cagalli gasped, along with a few girls who were watching them talk. "Excuse me?" she asked incredulously.

"I said shut up!" repeated Athrun. "These things that you are saying have nothing to do with me anymore, Cagalli! You are the only one who thinks that you are not pretty. God, will you look at yourself! You're gorgeous!"

If it were possible, the princess of Orb felt her face redden as she saw a number of guys to her right nod at what Athrun said. She took a deep breath and sniffed. She felt violent emotions bubbling in her chest. "I'm not stupid to hold your past against you, Athrun. So I won't do such a thing. I will not hold it against you that you fell in love once before you fell in love with me. That's not your fault. But when I saw you in the gym, and I saw how you looked at her, I saw the very first time you learned that Lacus no longer belonged to you. I saw your pain. I saw the regret." She looked away. "And then I started to wonder, what you ever saw in me… "

And the whole room was silent.

No one moved, and no one from the watching crowd dare say anything as everyone seemed to be anticipating what Athrun was going to say.

It felt like an eternity before he finally did say anything, but when he did, Cagalli felt her chest tighten.

"I saw beautiful amber eyes staring at me, Cagalli. A small face framed by unruly locks of golden hair, and a smile that made my knees weak. I saw a caring person who would be more than willing to jump in head first without even thinking so long as she did what she knew was right. I saw reckless heroism fueled by honorable causes, and a hard head backed up by a soft heart." Athrun pleaded with her with his eyes. "I see my future, not my past, when I look at you."

And that was the end of it. It started with a small sob that reverberated through her whole body, and in an instant, she felt herself shaking, and was in an instant engulfed in a tight and lovingly possessive embrace.

"I love you, Cagalli," she heard Athrun whisper in her ear. "Forgive me for making you feel that way. I did not mean it. You are beautiful. The most beautiful girl in my eyes. Please stop crying. I love you. I love you… "

But she could not stop crying. All around her, she heard people clapping around them, with vague _'awwww's _and _'how sweet's _coming from the watching girls. But she still could not bring herself to stop the tears. For the first time in her life, she felt beautiful.

Pulling away from him for a second, she pointed to her hair and pouted. "So you like my hair?"

Athrun could only chuckle.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Yzak poked his head through the door of Dearka's room and frowned when he saw the Buster pilot uncharacteristically quiet for the second hour in a row. "You still alive in here?" The Dearka he knew was not capable of being this quiet at all.

Dearka, who was sitting on his desk with his back to Yzak, looked over his shoulder and shrugged, then returned his gaze out the window. "Still breathing. Is there anything you need?"

Yzak proceeded into the room cautiously, then sat on the bed. "I won't be coming home tonight. Kari wants me to see her on the hill again."

With this, Dearka's eyes stared at him naughtily. "That's the second night in a row. You are so screwed. And so in love."

Yzak reddened immediately and he snarled at him. "Shut up. It's not like you are any different."

At the mention of this, the Buster pilot's smile vanished. Yzak was immediately alarmed. Dearka's mood was not usually so easy to dampen, but right now, he was definitely not acting like himself. "Is there anything you have to say to me?"

The tan boy blinked a few times, then returned his gaze out the window. He did not answer his question however. "So tell me," he started. "What are your plans about Kari?"

"What about her?"

"Everything. What are you going to do when they finally call you back up in the PLANTs?"

Yzak shrugged. "I leave."

The words were easy to say. But right after they were finally spoken did Yzak start to wonder about it. Before his mother left for the PLANTs, she had discussed with him the responsibilities waiting for him back in space. He had been quite overwhelmed by the sudden promotion in rank, and although quite honored, half of him honestly didn't know what to do.

For someone who had been so hungry for power then, he was surprised to see his priorities had been greatly changed. He actually had second thoughts in accepting the position in the council. Yet he loved his mother dearly and he had always valued the goals he swore himself to by entering the military, and so there were some things he had to let go of.

_"You think Kari will want to come with you back up in space?" _He remembered his mother asking him right before she left.

_"I don't really know, mother. And right now, I don't really care."_

He was such a liar. He had never stopped thinking about it ever since she brought it up. Yzak scratched his forehead irritably, trying to get rid of the thought.

"That's what I thought you'd say," Dearka said softly. "I suppose that is what's going to happen with me and Mir. Right?"

Yzak, after a moment of silence, sniffed. "It's our responsibility. We are soldiers to protect the PLANTs."

This brought silence to both of them, and Dearka sighed and said something that made Yzak wince. "Wouldn't it be wonderful to stay here for the rest of our lives?"

The Duel pilot took his time in thinking of his answer. After a moment's thought, he shook his head. "That would be too good to be true."

"But what about Athrun?"

Yzak scowled. "Athrun was already branded a traitor by Patrick Zala himself. He willingly coerced with the _'enemy' _and disobeyed direct orders from the chairman. You are different. Your case can easily be overlooked once the right strings are pulled. It is our duty to protect the PLANTs."

Dearka's lavender eyes met his. "Protect it from what?"

Yzak stared back at him for a good minute before finally standing up and proceeding to the door. "I don't know." He sniffed once more and opened the door. "I'm going. Don't wait up."

"Sure. Bye."

And Yzak left for the hill. All the way to their rendezvous point, thoughts of what Dearka said to him ran around his head like a hamster. He knew it. Dearka was starting to get attached to his life here on Earth. And although he would not want to admit it, so was he.

He knew deep down, he was starting to dread leaving. There were so many things he had learned here, and somehow, in some major way, military life was starting to lose its novelty. What was the purpose of protecting a colony that did not look like it was in danger? But he knew these thoughts were mere self-rationalizations, convincing himself that there was no reason for him to leave Earth. But that was childish. Especially when the only reason he had to stay was because of a certain strawberry-blonde haired girl with eyes that you could drown in happily.

Preoccupied, Yzak finally reached the hill where Kari was supposed to meet him. The last rays of the setting sun were hiding behind the vast horizon to the west and it was starting to get cold already. He wished he had brought a jacket or maybe a blanket for Kari to snuggle into with him, but it was too late to go back and get one. He looked up into the darkening sky and squinted. Directly above his head he could make out a tiny star twinkling brightly in the velvet curtain of nightfall. Frowning, Yzak looked at his watch. Perhaps Kari got stuck in traffic? Probably. But then again, maybe not.

He waited for fifteen more minutes and saw a dozen more stars pop up into the sky. Maybe she had fallen asleep and is now hurrying to meet him? Hopefully…

Yzak looked at his watch and grunted. Thirty minutes have passed. Still no Kari. He was starting to worry. Maybe he should go and call her house? But then again, her mother might answer. Maybe he should go to her house… But what if she was already on the way and might miss him when she finally got here? He decided to stay.

Yzak sat on the grass and felt his patience running out…

"_No, no. Meet me there up in the hill. I'll be there as soon as the first star shows itself in the sky. I promise."_

Yzak looked back up into the sky and his eyes widened in awe as he saw millions upon millions of heavenly bodies radiating down upon him. So many, many stars…

And yet still no Kari…

Yzak sat there and watched the stars while he waited all night.

Kari never came…

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

**_Yuugiri: Hello everybody! Gomen for the late, late update! It is really not my fave chappie, but the last month has left my heart in emotional anagrams and I suppose it sort of reflected upon my writing… Truly sorry… Please spare me the usual rotten tomatoes and sharp pointy knives of death… I will make it up to you after I write a one-shot to cheer all of us up. We need happy stories once in a while. _**

_**But I may have to warn you, this is the chapter that starts the chain of chapters that will tackle Kari's identity. It may start to sound boring, but please bear with me. **_

_**I would like to thank everyone who waited patiently for this update. To those people whose stories I haven't read and reviewed in a while, rest assured I will be catching up on them. Trying to get my life back on track. Hopefully this is a good start.**_

_**Leave Yuugiri a review, she loves to hear your suggestions and opinions if there are any at all. **_


	34. Phase 34: Where Do We Go?

_**Don't you just love cliffies? XD**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam SEED.**_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_**August 9, A.W**_

At around two in the morning, Dearka was woken up by an extremely loud crash coming from the living room. Instantly alert and heightened senses screaming, he scrambled out of bed and bolted out of his room in a blur of disheveled blond hair and bared teeth. Whoever was trying to break into their dorm was grossly mistaken. One, there was really nothing to steal, and two, he was not going to let the culprit leave without his teeth in a bag.

Expecting a fist fight the moment he got to the scene, he was caught by surprise when he flipped open the light switch and his wide-awake lavender eyes beheld what appeared to be a fist trying to pull itself out of the gaping hole right smack in the middle of their door.

A hole which, by all means, certainly did not belong there! Yzak's loud curses were heard from behind it.

At the sight of this, Dearka blurted out the first thing that came into his mind. _"What the freaking heck is wrong with you!" _

He trudged his way towards the door when he realized the silver-haired Coordinator was having a hard time dislodging his arm from the hole. Unlocking the knob, Dearka yanked the door open and felt satisfaction from seeing Yzak get dragged along with it. Much to his dismay, it seemed like his friend's racket had not simply woken him up, but had indeed woken up half the floor's sleeping occupants, along with them was Kira dressed in what looked like teddy bear pajamas (What's up with that?) and a sleepy Athrun in boxers and a bathrobe. Both, at the sight of Yzak, immediately took the job of crowd control.

By the time Yzak had disengaged himself from the mess he had gotten himself in, Kira and Athrun had gotten rid of the grumbling crowd, Dearka had instantly herded all three guys into their dorm room. All three of them seemed to have decided to stay at a safe distance away from Yzak.

Kira, however, was slightly ticked. "You busted a hole through our dorm room before, and now you did it here, too. What the heck is it with you and holes on doors?"

Oh, yes! Hadn't that been a complete surprise for Dearka the moment he saw Kira's door, what with a crudely hammered piece of wood attempting to cover up a hole that was splintered and made from the inside. Kira said it had been because of Kari. It was not going to be a surprise if this hole was caused by her as well.

"Just leave me alone and mind your own freaking business," Yzak snarled as he made his way through the living room, almost running Athrun through as he went straight to his sleeping quarters, slamming the door behind him so hard that whoever had slept through the first racket he had made earlier was now probably wide awake as well.

For a few seconds, the three Coordinators were silent until Athrun let out a loud yawn.

"That was completely weird," Kira said after.

Athrun shrugged. "I'd have to agree with that. But right now, I'm too sleepy to care."

"Me too. I'm going back to bed." With that, Kira and Athrun filed out of the room silently.

Dearka stared after them in amazement. Since when had those two started speaking again? Shrugging and scratching his head, he headed for the kitchen and pulled out that hammer and a box of nails from the bottom drawer of the sink. Leave it to Yzak to make him work on the mess he made.

It took him about ten noisy minutes to patch the blasted door up. The moment he got things done, he got cleaned up and headed back to his room, although he did not feel like sleeping at all.

On his way to his quarters, he was momentarily distracted when he heard, yet again another loud racket coming from the other side of the door of Yzak's quarters. He had the feeling that this was going to happen. Given that he was already wide awake, he decided that he might as well make the most of it and see what he was up to.

He knocked twice before opening the door and dared himself in poking his head in to see what was going on. He saw what appeared to be the cause of the loud racket; the ladder back chair of his desk stood toppled in the corner and Yzak was lying on his back in the middle of his bed, arms thrown over his eyes.

"You okay in here?" he asked softly, pushing the door open and making his way inside, cautiously making sure he would not have that much of a hard time running back out if Yzak decided that he didn't want any company.

In the years he had known Yzak, he had seen his mood swings and tantrums about the shallowest of things, and majority of the time he had been there to see him in action in releasing all his anger on things. Chairs would fly and locker doors would be damaged in his rage, and so him hiding out in his room and throwing a tantrum there was quite a surprise in itself. He had always thought that lashing out in public had brought his friend some pleasure.

"Go away," Yzak moaned, not even moving from his place.

"Are you sure you're okay? I thought you were with Kari…"

The name itself made Yzak stiffen evidently. Dearka could only bite his lower lip uncertainly. Kari had always had that effect on him. Sometimes, the Buster pilot had the feeling that the guy was honestly smitten, however hard he tried to deny it.

"She didn't show up, okay? Now can you leave me alone?"

Dearka frowned, bravely taking another step forward. "Is everything all right? I mean, is she okay?"

This comment made Yzak suddenly sit up on the bed, eyes wide as if this was the first time it had crossed his mind that something bad might have happened to Kari that's why she didn't show up.

Dearka immediately took back the words, afraid that Yzak might suddenly maul him over. "I mean, of course she's okay! What could possibly happen to her?"

The light-haired Coordinator stared at him blankly for a few minutes before withering completely. "I don't know. I should have picked her up there at her house. Or maybe I should have waited for her at school or something."

"Stop talking that way. I bet she just forgot and – "

"_Kari never forgets!_" Yzak roared at him, making Dearka jump in place. The tone reminded him how his friend could be so unstable when Kari was not around.

"Right, right Kari never forgets… I didn't mean she forgot about you. Especially on your birth – " Dearka froze in mid sentence when he suddenly remembered something he had left in Yzak's desk for his birthday present, which, at his current mood right now, he did not believe the Duel pilot should be seeing. It was meant as a joke, since Kari was the first ever girl he ever got involved with.

He could see the small box wrapped in glossy yellow paper sitting innocently on the desk exactly where he left it after Yzak had gone off to see Kari. He felt slightly nervous and made a move to snatch it when Yzak saw him and eyed him suspiciously.

"What are you up to?" Yzak snapped. No sooner did his eyes zoom in on Dearka's target. Before he could even react, Yzak was on his feet and the present was swept off from the desk with skilled hands.

Dearka felt cold sweat trickle down the side of his face despite the cold floor beneath his feet. "It was supposed to be my birthday present… and well… "

Yzak narrowed his eyes at him like a wolf. "Then why do you look like you are going to snatch it back when it is a gift for me?"

Dearka swallowed hard. "Oh, ahh… Well… "

"What's in it?"

"Something that you should not see… Now if you would be kind enough to hand it back – "

Yzak ripped the present open.

Dearka felt his insides turn into mush. "I suggest you don't do that…"

Too late. He watched as Yzak's eyes landed on the smaller boxes that fell from the bigger box and in an instant, the light-haired boy's face paled, reddened then turned into an unhealthy shade of blue. There, scattered on his bed, were several boxes of condoms in all assorted flavors, that on normal circumstances would have been quite funny especially since he knew Yzak was easy to embarrass that way.

However, right now, Yzak was not amused.

He picked up one of the strawberry flavored ones and stared at it with a deadly look. "You give me _these _for my _birthday?"_

Dearka laughed weakly, wanting to be anywhere but there. "It was supposed to be a joke. Remember your birthday two years ago?"

Wrong move. At the memory of the said event, which circulated upon Dearka's insistence of Yzak going out on a blind date (he did not dare go into details), Yzak let out a loud roar and Dearka yelped as he ran for his life from the room, boxes of flavored condoms flying at him.

Despite all this, he found himself laughing once he was safely in his room. Yzak was so easy to embarrass when it comes to girls. All he needed was to bring them up.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Miriallia went to school earlier than usual that day and could be found sitting in the farthest table of the school library, sorting out photographs by size. Today was indeed going to be a busy day. Her photography teacher was demanding a lot from their class and Miriallia did not know what to do.

Fingering the first two pictures she had gotten out of the envelope, she sighed. The first one was a picture of a mother wiping the face of her daughter who has spilled chocolate ice cream all over her pink dress. She had taken the picture candidly while she was sitting outside the coffee shop down town yesterday after class.

The second picture was that of two bluebirds pecking on a piece of discarded cookies on the pavement. Miriallia had been so proud of this shot. It had been such a difficult subject and she had only been entirely lucky to have caught this one on camera. So far, it was the most promising of all photographs she had. If it hadn't been for Lacus who had tried to steal it from her yesterday, thus smattering finger prints all over it and creasing one corner of it, she would have submitted this one.

Carefully dumping the rest of the pictures on the table and thumbing through them, she could not help but smile at the sight of the picture of Dearka she had taken when they were by the lake. It was the day Fallon had chained herself to him.

Miriallia frowned. The memory still made her skin crawl.

Moving on, she sifted through several other pictures and giggled softly at several pictures of Cagalli and Lacus in their dorm room. With the princess of Orb's hair looked like a bird's nest and Lacus' face covered by some green mud pack, she could not help but scold herself for even considering of bringing those to school.

She was about to move on when she felt someone flick her ear from behind, making her gasp. She immediately sighed in relief when Yalin dropped down on the seat next to her, once again impressing his perfect smile that remarkably did not annoy her anymore.

"Good morning. You're up early," he greeted. When Miriallia saw his gray eyes searching the photos, she immediately grabbed the pictures of Lacus and Cagalli and slipped them inside her envelope swiftly. "Ah, Sir Santos giving you a hard time in your class, isn't he?" He picked up one of the photos that she had left on the table and whistled. "These are good. Are you thinking of making a career out of this?"

Miriallia blinked. "Hardly. I'm just trying to get by."

"Well, you're doing a pretty good job at it." He replaced the picture back in the pile where he got it and leaned forward, placing his elbows on the smooth surface of the table then resting his chin on his hands.

Miriallia stared at the boy for a brief second then started to gather her photos in a neat stack while waiting for him to talk. Yalin loved to talk. She was starting to wonder why he was so quiet at the moment. Or is it because they were in the library?

For the last three days, Yalin had been catching up on her in the halls to say hello, and just yesterday, when she shopped for some extra stuff they needed back in the dorm, he would always keep her company while pretending to work. Of course, Yalin was wise enough to stay away when Dearka or any of the other boys were around her, not because he was afraid of them, but because Yalin knew that even if he did try to make friends with any of them, he would be lucky to walk away without a bleeding lip. He however, did not seem to hold it against them. For someone who had been in cahoots with a gang not too long ago, he sure was understanding.

But his silence right now was quite unnerving. Yalin was always talking to her about something that he thought was funny, but right now, he was merely sitting there and doing nothing.

Miriallia finally could not take it. She looked over to him and asked, "Are you all right?"

Yalin blinked a few times before finally looking over to her. "Me? Why of course I'm all right. I was just…" he hesitated a bit, and Miriallia waited for him to continue. He didn't and she poked his shoulder gently.

"You were just…?"

With this, Yalin made a small miserable noise at the back of his throat and rested his forehead on the table, hiding his face. After a while, he raised his face to look at her and a smile was plastered on his lips once more. "It's nothing. I was just thinking about a lot of things."

Miriallia doubted it, but decided that this was not her business and so she smiled back at him and said, "Well, I'd better go. Maybe I can get some random shots in the soccer field before first bell."

"Ah, good idea. I'll walk you there."

And so gathering everything into her envelope again, Miriallia was accompanied by Yalin on the way to the soccer field. Quite lost in thought and still worrying about what she was going to present later in class, she was caught off guard by a small blur bulleting out of the corridor and zooming straight for Yalin, tackling the unsuspecting boy off his feet with a loud '_gaahh!_' escaping from his mouth.

Miriallia gasped. "Fallon! No!"

She did not even mind dropping her envelope and spilling all its contents onto the floor as she ran to where the two had skidded to a halt on the glossy floor. Scared out of her wits, wondering if Fallon was going to be violent on the poor boy, she was quite surprised and pleased at the same time to see that Fallon was, in fact not being violent at all. If anything, aside from the embarrassing position she was in, her legs straddling Yalin's torso in an indecent position that made Miriallia grateful there weren't any people present, the girl was silent and blushing as she stared down at her victim.

Miriallia covered her mouth to stop herself from bursting into giggles. Fallon had thought that Yalin was Dearka since he was walking with her!

Yalin opened his eyes groggily and looked around. "What hit me?"

Fallon's eyes lingered on Yalin's face for a brief moment, opened her mouth as if to say something, closed it again, then without much hesitation, she scrambled up on her feet, her face reddening even more.

Miriallia hurried to Yalin's side and, understanding that being a Natural, he would not be able to recover as quickly as Dearka could after getting tormented by Fallon, helped him to sit up. "Are you – "

"I'm so sorry!" Fallon suddenly blurted out as she bowed deeply, attempting to hide her face in her short blond hair. "I thought you were… "

"Dearka?" Yalin continued, rubbing his back and shooing Miriallia away when she tried to help him to his feet, saying he can do it. It took him a lot of effort to do so, but he managed after a while. "Man, I'm starting to wonder how Dearka can survive two minutes with you. Strong girl you are, I tell you."

Miriallia did not dare explain to him the reason behind her strength, but shook her head disapprovingly at the girl. "You could have hurt someone by the way you are acting. It's dangerous just running people through." She narrowed her eyes at the girl. "And why are you out of the orphanage again?"

Fallon looked as if she was having a hard time thinking of a good enough excuse as the why she was roaming around without any company, but didn't find any. She scowled at Miriallia angrily. "It's none of your business. And Dearka will not be pleased to know you're hanging out with some other guy!" With that, she stuck out her tongue and bolted into a dead run down the corridor where she came, and disappeared down the hall, footsteps thundering after her.

Miriallia shook her head again, this time in frustration. "She's really a difficult girl…"

Yalin tried to stretch his strained back muscles and winced. "I can tell… Anyway, I think that was a threat she just gave you."

"It doesn't matter. She was being a pain. Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah. I'm all right. I should go though, in case she does tell your boyfriend I have to endure another row with your friends as well. See you around, Mir." With that, Yalin waved at her and proceeded down the opposite direction where Fallon had disappeared into, limping a bit as he tried to rub his back again. He vanished around the corridor which led unmistakably to the infirmary.

"See you," Mir called after him and proceeded to collect her scattered pictures on the floor. After a while did it occur to her that she still needed a subject. Groaning, she started for the soccer field.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

In their elective class, which Kira did not feel like attending, the Freedom pilot met up with Cagalli, who appeared to be ditching her elective too.

"How are you feeling today?" Kira asked his sister as they made their way out into the soccer field for some fresh air. After that annoying Health education class where they were required to watch a movie about something Kira had fallen asleep in the middle of, the outdoors was definitely a good change of environment.

Cagalli shrugged as they found a good patch of grass that overlooked the crowded soccer field where a number of people were playing around and slacking off, obviously cutting off on their electives as well. "All right. How about you?"

Kira scratched his head of hair and smiled. "Much better." He suddenly felt quite self-conscious when he saw his twin looking at him weird. "What?"

"Get a hair cut."

Kira squirmed in his seat and looked away from her. He did not feel like getting his hair cut anytime soon. Especially now that it was getting cold and he hated it when his ears got too cold. Desperate to change the subject, he plucked a blade of grass and poked Cagalli's ear with it. She jumped and let out a strangled gasp, then socked him painfully on the arm.

"_Stop _that!"

Kira laughed and threw away the blade of grass. "Sorry. I couldn't help it. By the way, did you know Yzak punched a hole into his and Dearka's dorm room door?"

Cagalli's face twisted in an ugly frown. "Again?"

"No, no. The first door he punched was mine. This is a different door."

"It's a good thing the dorm doesn't charge you for repairs."

"Yeah. Lucky." Kira poked Cagalli's arm. "What you doing after class today?"

This caught Cagalli off guard. She blinked her amber eyes and shrugged again. "Nothing much. Just finish off some homework and all that. Why?"

Kira leaned on his hand and looked out into the soccer field, watched some of the students fool around with a soccer ball, then looked over to his sister with a smile. It has been a while since he had been alone with Cagalli this long without getting her agitated about anything. He could never forget that day when he found out that Cagalli was his sister, more so, his twin. Did anything ever change between them after? It seemed like nothing did. Perhaps that was the reason why he had been so drawn to her from the moment they met. "Wanna eat out for dinner later?"

Cagalli blinked again, then narrowed her eyes at him. "What are you after?"

Kira snorted. "Is it too much to ask to hang out with my only sister?"

She was not buying it. "Okay, you didn't break anything that is supposedly mine, did you?"

"I wouldn't be here if I did. I'd be hiding somewhere you won't be able to find me."

"Then why are you asking me to dinner?"

Kira laughed, threw his arms around Cagalli's neck and ruffled her hair, making her scream. "I just want to spend some time with my little sister."

Cagalli squirmed under his arm, screaming, "I'm older than you are!"

"Right, right. Now have dinner with me later. If you are nice enough, I might even pay."

This made Cagalli laugh despite her current position and her immaculately wonderful hair getting even more tousled. "Fine, fine. Dinner it is. Come to think of it, we haven't spent much time together to talk about… stuff… " her expression went blank for a few moments, and Kira let her go. She sat up straight then smiled sadly at him. "Stuff about you and me…"

Kira straightened as well, slightly distraught at what his sister said. It just had to go back to that certain day when she found out that she wasn't an only child, right before her father died. They didn't have time to talk about it before. There was no time to talk about such things. They were too busy staying alive then, up in space. But what Kira did not like much about these conversations, was that it depressed the heck out of him. He inched closer to Cagalli and patted her on the back. "You and me will always be you and me, Cagalli. Nothing changes. However we became what we are now matters little." He pulled her to him and once again messed up her hair. "Don't worry about it too much."

Cagalli was silent for a little while before sighing and leaning against her brother. "Do you think… do you think you could have had blond hair and amber eyes like me?"

Kira paused for a second, then nodded. "It's possible. Or the other way around." He touched his hair with his free hand. "I wonder what I would look like with blond hair?"

"It won't suit you. You are too pale…" Cagalli said absentmindedly.

Kira frowned and roughly gave her nuggie, making Cagalli squeal once more.

"All right, break it up," came a voice from behind them. Kira and Cagalli both looked up and smiled when they saw Lacus and Athrun approaching, the Justice pilot lugging around what appeared to be a portable keyboard. Both of them apparently had just gotten out of music class and are now outside to skip their electives too.

"Lacus, hi," Kira said as his girlfriend wrapped her arms around his neck from behind. "I wasn't expecting you to be going AWOL on classes."

"It's such a nice day out, I can't help it," the songstess said and sat on the grass next to him, throwing her long pink ponytail over her shoulder and arranging her skirt.

Kira turned away when he saw Athrun bending down to plant a kiss on his sister's lips. Now in all honesty, everything between him and Athrun were pretty much going back to normal, but that was because both he and his best friend decided not to talk about it. This was one of the easiest ways they get over whatever kind of misunderstanding they have; denial. Both seemed to have that certain agreement that talking about it would mess things up even more, and Kira was quite glad that at least Athrun shared the same sentiments that he has.

Perhaps that was why they were best friends in the first place.

The four of them spent the next five minutes silently enjoying the cool breeze while watching the action on the soccer field. After a while, Miriallia and Dearka emerged from the library building.

Athrun was the one who saw them first and he waved to catch their attention.

"Wow, how long has it been since we've been together like this?" was Dearka's first comment the moment they reached them. He then turned to Cagalli. "Hey, C. What happened to your hair?"

Cagalli gritted her teeth. "Hey, D. What happened to your face?"

"Ha-ha… Good one," the Buster pilot muttered as he helped Miriallia sit down and then settled next to her.

"What a perfect day to skip classes," Milly said after giving Lacus and Cagalli a hug. "It's weird. For the first time after a long time, we finally caught up with each other."

With this, Kira could only laugh. Now all they needed was Yzak.

Kira frowned and looked over his shoulder.

_Where is Yzak anyways?_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Yzak had spent the whole morning sitting on the stairs, waiting for Kari to drop by her locker, but it seemed like the girl did not have any plans on showing up today. Which drove Yzak completely crazy. Kari stood him up for some reason he didn't know. So many thoughts were swimming in his head, and none of them were making him feel any better.

He was about to stand up from where he was sitting, when a shadow fell over him, making him look up. He did not like what he saw.

Sparkling teeth greeted him, making bile rise up his throat. "You again. What do you want?" Honestly, it was as if this guy was everywhere lately.

Yalin cocked his pretty head to the right but did not say anything. Instead, he handed him a thin flat parcel wrapped in what he recognized as shock proof material.

"What?" he asked.

"This came by the Guidance office for you earlier today, and Mrs. Takano wanted me to give this to you. It's from the PLANTs," said Yalin.

Yzak stared at the package as if expecting it to explode, then took it gingerly. Flipping it over, he found out it was a package from his mother. Obviously a birthday present. He looked back up and found Yalin staring at him.

"What else do you want?" he snapped.

Yalin was not moved. He seemed to have no sense of danger, because he chose to sit down on the stairs next to Yzak, who in turn moved as far away from him as possible. Yalin didn't seem to notice.

"Listen. I just wanted to ask you… If you did anything to make Mrs. Takano hate you so much…"

The question surprised Yzak, not because he didn't already know this, but because Yalin of all people was asking him of it. He was beginning to think the guy honestly knew more than he was letting on. "I didn't do nothing. And even if I did, it's none of your frigging business."

With this, Yalin gave him quite a perplexed look, then sighed. "Yzak, is there any way you could lower your defenses on me for even just a second?"

"No."

Yalin opened his mouth, then closed it, opened it again as if finally figuring out what to say. "Well, I personally don't care if you hate me or what. But listen. It's about Kari – "

At the mention of the name, Yzak's ears perked up immediately. "Where is she?"

Yalin was instantly uneasy. His grey eyes darted from one corner to another, before finally sighing and standing up. "She's not here in school. Try… try checking her house."

Yzak stood up also, almost dropping the package he was holding. "And how come you know this?"

Yalin once again looked uneasy. "I… overheard Mrs. Takano on the phone with someone and I heard her say Kari being at home and …"

"And what?"

"And that she won't be coming out anytime soon what with all the things she was taking care of…"

Yzak felt all the blood in him rush to his head. She was at home all along… Something must be up… Is she all right? Is she sick? Those damn headaches…!

When he didn't say anything for a while, Yalin took the advantage to speak. "Yzak, are you sure everything is all right between you, Kari and her mother?"

Yzak pinned him a death glare. "I don't care about her mother, or what she thinks," he snarled. And with that, he stalked away, barely hearing Yalin calling after him, saying something about school hours and skipping class.

He didn't care. It was not like Kari not to show up at something so important.

_Something had to be up…_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

That afternoon, Dearka found himself walking home with Athrun, who was carrying with him his huge portable musical instrument which made him think about Nicol so much. After having spent the rest of the hour lounging about in the soccer field with the gang, everyone set off into their business for tonight. Kira was taking Cagalli out for dinner, Miriallia and Lacus said that it was their turn to shop together for new clothes, and having nothing to do, he decided to hang out with Athrun for the time being.

Besides, he had nothing better to do at the moment.

"How's you playing?"

Athrun smiled. "Getting much better at it."

Dearka nodded. "Mir told me about it. She said you're getting really good."

The comment, as expected, made the Justice pilot blush. For someone who he had known to be tough and quite proud of his achievements, his praise about his playing seemed to be a different story. "I'm having fun with it, that's all I know." And with that, he immediately changed the subject. "I heard the keys Cagalli ordered are coming really soon. You can finally get rid of that unique accessory you are sporting." He pointed at the handcuffs still dangling from Dearka's wrist.

He found this quite humorous. Giving the cuffs a bit of a shake, he then stuffed it back in his pocket. "Just when I was getting used to having them."

They laughed at this and fell silent after a while. The next question that came out of Athrun's mouth made Dearka miss a step.

"Any news from the PLANTs?"

He did in fact get news from the PLANTs. He hadn't told anyone about the email he had gotten from his father, Tad Elthman. Not even Miriallia. But that was simply because he was, as always, in denial about it.

His father was making him come home…

Now in reality, he wanted to see his father. It had been a while since he had seen him, and although he hated admitting it, he missed him dearly. He had been informed of the news of his impending trial, and although things were "looking up", as what his father had said, he was starting to wonder if anything could be "looking up" more than what he already had here. He had tight friends, a loving girlfriend… he was at peace… And he was loving it. But he knew that he couldn't stay. He was only delaying the inevitable.

Turning to Athrun, he asked. "So what are your plans after this?"

The Justice pilot blinked at him, then asked back, "After what?"

Dearka gestured at his surroundings. "After Japan. You know, plans about the future. You _are _planning about the future, right?"

Athrun laughed. "Of course! Who isn't? But right now I pretty much have everything sorted out."

This made Dearka curious. "Really?"

"Yep. Finish this semester and go with Cagalli to Orb and that's it."

"That's it?"

"Yep. Why?"

Dearka was taken aback. "Nothing… It's just so… uncomplicated…"

"Why shouldn't it be?"

_Why shouldn't it be?_

Dearka found himself shrugging. "I don't know… For my part, I'm starting to think I need to make better planning about my life than just that."

Athrun looked over to him as he shifted his hold on the organ. "Did you or did you not receive any news about the PLANTs?"

Dearka swallowed hard. He always knew what to ask. "I got an email from my father, asking me to come back up to the PLANTs as soon as possible…"

This brightened the Justice pilot's face. "Ah! That must mean everything is settling down up there. That's wonderful news."

"Yeah," he said weakly, and was caught by surprise at the next thing that came out of his mouth. "But… I don't want to go."

For a short moment, Athrun stared at him with wide blue eyes, almost dropping the organ on the ground. After a while, he sputtered. "You… want to stay? _Here?_"

"Yes… I mean, no… I mean… I don't know…" He looked straight ahead of them as they resumed their walk. "I mean, is it up for me to decide? I'm still under the Service. My superiors want me back." He kicked a pebble on the floor and watched it roll off in front of them.

Athrun followed suit and kicked at it as well, making the pebble dart forward. "What does Yzak say? Did he get an email from his mother about anything that concerns going back?"

"I don't know. He's not telling me anything. But I know he will not hesitate on going back up to the PLANTs when called. He has a very big responsibility on the PLANTs now. He's going to be part of the Council now. It's what he's always wanted, remember? Success. Accomplishments. This is his chance."

"And what are you planning to do?"

Dearka shrugged. "I don't know. What would you do if you were me?"

Athrun snorted. "Tch! I'd go back, Dearka. _If _I were you, which I'm not."

Big shock. "You would? But… what about your life here? What about Cagalli?"

Athrun sighed, looked up into the sky and said, "We can't always get what we want and get away with it, Dearka. There are bigger things that have to be prioritized than our wants. Especially when you are in the service." He smirked. "You of all people should know that. You weren't like me then. I was branded a traitor. _You _helped the Archangel while you were _still _under the service. And that made all the difference. You did, not only what you thought was right, but what you _wanted _to do. You wanted to protect that ship even though you didn't fully understand what you'd get out of it. And now you are going to have to face the consequences of your action as a _soldier_."

Athrun was right. When he decided to help the Archangel then, he had little reason to. It would have been easier to walk away. Heck, he was set free! He could have just gone off and rendezvoused with ZAFT in Carpentaria. But his heart did not give him much of a choice. He wanted to do something simply because he wanted it.

Athrun's next question made even his roots blush. "Come to think of it, I never really did get to ask you… Or maybe I did, but you just gave me some lousy answer… Why did you help the Archangel then?"

Of course, he could not lie. Even if he did, he doubted Athrun would believe him. He gave him a shy smile, then said. "_She _was in there… I was about to go, but her face kept flashing in my mind's eye. I couldn't walk away. Call me shallow for abandoning my post because of a girl… But I couldn't turn away. I just had to go back for her."

And with this, Athrun nodded, as if understanding him perfectly. "So you are willing to disobey orders _again_, just because you are afraid of leaving her?"

The truth sounded so shallow when said. He nodded. "Yes."

This made Athrun chuckle richly. "You're a fool."

Dearka smiled weakly. "Thanks." He felt a little better.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Yzak stared at the front door of Kari's house and remembered having stood here not a few days ago, waiting for her to get dressed to have a small study date in their dorm room. He was having second thoughts about knocking on the door, as it seemed like there wasn't anyone in there. Could Yalin be lying to him?

_I'll break his jaw if I find out that he is…_

Approaching the door cautiously, tucking the flat package his mom had sent him under his left arm, he proceeded and knocked on the door three times. He waited for a few seconds before knocking again. Still no answer. He tried the doorknob. Locked.

He looked over his shoulder, afraid that someone might see him. When he saw the coast was clear, he gripped the knob tight and felt his muscles in his forearm ripple as he exerted pressure on it while twisting. After a few more seconds, he heard something snap. Old fashioned locks were so inefficient. They were so easy to break.

Quite satisfied that he didn't have to punch a hole through it, he pushed open the door and closed it behind him. The Takano residence didn't seem to have changed much since the last time he had been in it, which was when he took a sick Kari home from the amusement park. The living room was as dark as ever, with wicker furniture here and there. It was only then did he realize they didn't have a television in their living room, which seemed quite odd for him in a typical Japanese house.

Cautiously making his way through the living room, he didn't know what to expect to see in there. He had been hoping Kari would open the door for him when he knocked, but he was greatly disappointed. Never in his life did he expect that he would be breaking into his girlfriend's house to find her. That would be a good story to tell the police though, if ever he did get caught for breaking and entering.

_Hey officer. Me? Steal? No, no! I was just looking for my girlfriend. She stood me up yesterday and I heard she was here so I broke open the door and forced my way in…_

Yzak scowled. _Where are you, Kari?_

The house, much to the Duel pilot's annoyance, was too quiet for his taste. He could not eve hear the typical wall clock tick-tocking. The house was undeniably eerie. Or maybe it was because he was being a bit paranoid. He supposed that was what happened to you when you enter a house without permission.

Unable to help it anymore, Yzak settled by calling out her name.

"Kari? Are you here?"

No answer. Yzak went straight to her room, as it was the only place he had ever been in that house. Kari's room, like the living room, did not look like it had been moved since his last visit. Except for the clutter on Kari's desk before, which now was obviously missing, nothing had been duly changed that it made the hairs at the back of Yzak's neck stand on end. He wondered if Kari ever slept here.

He decided to move on. Although the house was fairly small, it was neat and organized that he was afraid to move carelessly and move something out of place that will make them realize someone had been prowling in their stuff. That, of course, he soon realized, was too late, because the door was already busted. Several doors along the narrow hall were locked, and he had searched the kitchen for any signs of life but found nothing. But yet he knew that there was someone in the house, or else he would not have bothered to break in. Kari was in here, he knew… She just had to be in here…

At the end of the corridor of locked doors was where he found what he was looking for. An open door… And he could hear shuffling from the inside…

He felt his spine turn into ice as he pressed his back against the wall, stealthily inching towards the doorframe to check what was going on inside the room which seemed to be the only room that looked real, what with the movement in it; everything else looked frozen in time.

As he finally managed to get a good look of who it was, he nearly stumbled at the sight of the familiar strawberry blond hair that he adored so much…

There on the floor, sat Kari, mountains upon mountains of paperwork and important-looking documents scattered around her. Her back was to him and was oblivious of his presence until he stepped into the room silently.

With this, his Kari turned to look at him, and at the sight of those beautiful green eyes, those eyes he was willing to drown in almost every time she looked at him, he gasped. Her cheeks were tear stained, and more tears were leaking down those eyes…

_God… those eyes…_

Yzak took another step forward, nearly dropping his parcel. "Kari…? What the heck is this?"

Her wonderful eyes never left his as her slender fingers danced over the tons of piles of papers and photos around her until it stopped on one that looked familiar to him… It was the picture he had found lying in her room when he took her home after their amusement park date…

Her pretty mouth opened and the only words that came out, her voice wavering in the most un-Kari-like way, making Yzak shiver…

"Yzak…? _Who am I?_"

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

**_Yuugiri: Yes. I am evil. Cliffies are my thang. But it does make you start to think, right? What does Yalin know about Kari? And what was that scene with Fallon about? (Ne Nita?) Is Dearka really going back to PLANT? What could Kira and Cagalli be talking about? And what is it with Kari? _**

_**All right, so it is a bit short and I'm not promising anything good for the next few chapters, and with the way things are going, I'm starting to get second thoughts about the YzakKari pairings and their ending. No no, no one will die that's for sure. So don't worry your pretty little heads. XD**_

_**Yuugiri is feeling a lot better now. Thank you so much for your reviews on the last chapter when some of you made me feel a whole lot better. Thank you, thank you. It means a lot to me! One of these days I will have to thank you all individually. You have all been really nice to bad, bad Yuugiri who keeps on leaving cliffies. **_


	35. Phase 35: To Be What You Are

_**Ahh, an update! XD Happy happy joy joy!**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam SEED.**_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

The early dinner was wonderful. Kira had brought her to this small Steak House that overlooked Abashiri lake. She could not remember ever eating so much before. Patting her full to bursting tummy, she looked over to Kira who sat across from her. This was the first time she had ever gone out to dinner with him, and remarkably, she was having fun. Kira was actually a funny guy when he wasn't trying to be one big ball of angst.

Cagalli leaned forward and propped her chin on her hands. "You _are _paying for this, right?"

Kira chuckled. "Yes, I am." He pulled the candle in the middle of the table closer to him and started running his fingers over the flame like a little kid. "But we're waiting for your chocolate cake, remember?"

Cagalli groaned. She was so hungry earlier that she ordered so much food. She looked down at her plate and groaned even more. She had barely finished her meal, and she had almost forgotten that she still had a slice of chocolate cake on the way. "God, it completely slipped my mind…"

"Full?"

"Yeah."

"Wanna share?"

"Yeah."

Her brother nodded and concentrated on playing with the flame, occasionally trying to pinch it between his thumb and forefinger. She did not doubt she had his full attention. For the last hour of talking with him, it was then did she find out Kira was an excellent listener. But along with that, unfortunately, he was also a keen observer. And he never forgot about tiny details that normally other people would not have paid much attention to.

"Say," he started, his lavender eyes flickering to her face a moment before returning to the candle that had taken his fancy. "Do you remember how we first met?"

This made Cagalli blink, somewhat taken aback with the question. "Who could ever forget that day? It was in Heliopolis when you and I first met. You were with Milly and Kazui then, off to visit Sai. And I was there." She narrowed her eyes at him, "You thought I was a boy."

Kira laughed richly. "Yeah, I remember that." He shook his head. "I've always wondered, Cagalli. Why is it that you act like a boy, dress like a boy and pretty much hit like a boy, yet you get mad when people mistake you for one?"

"That's because I'm not a boy."

"I know that. But…" his voice trailed of and he shook his head. "I guess it's better that you are what you are. Headstrong and independent. You will find that advantageous when you finally start running things in Orb."

What Kira said made Cagalli pause a bit before continuing with the conversation. It hadn't really crossed her mind, actually. She was having such a great time in Japan that her responsibility for her nation appeared to be some distant future that might not come at all. She smiled sadly. Eventually, she will have to grow up. Everything here in Japan would have been just a memory.

"You okay?" Kira's voice brought her back to reality and she felt him tap her arm gently.

Cagalli blinked. "Yeah, sorry."

His eyes lingered on her face for a second too long before he resumed with playing with the candle. "You didn't forget about Orb, did you?"

"I didn't!" she started to protest loudly, then finally realized her temper was getting the best of her again. She could not be mad at Kira for stating the truth. She _had _forgotten about Orb. She was too busy taking care of her own life, being and acting her age. She needed to grow up faster. There was no one else to depend on except for her. "I'm sorry. It's not like I forgot, but right now it seemed to be the least of my priorities. Kisaka is taking care of everything, Murrue is helping out."

Her twin smiled at her. "You can't depend on them forever. Or can you?" he asked curiously.

Cagalli shook her head. Kisaka had explained everything to her before they had left Orb. "By the time I'm of legal age – two years from now – I would be the officially _in _the Council. Until then, I need to learn as much as I can for my position. I don't want to screw this up… For my father's sake."

And then they were silent. How long has it been since she last thought about her father? Too long. She hadn't really talked about him with anyone, but that was because there weren't any opportunities to do so.

"He was a kind man, Uzumi…" Kira said carefully, as if he knew this was a delicate topic.

Cagalli nodded her head and stared at Kira, who had stopped playing with the flame and was now watching her intently. "I loved him dearly, even though I never got the chance to show it. I've always been a spoiled child who never listened to reason. But he was patient with me."

"I know."

Cagalli shifted in her seat and bit her lip before finally speaking. "Before we left for space the day my father died, that was when he told me about you. He told me that I won't be alone because I would be with you." Kira looked up at her. She smiled. "It was then did I find out you were my brother. My twin. And it was then did I finally found out the strange reason why I was so drawn to you. You are family."

Her last comment made Kira suck in sharply.

Cagalli furrowed her brow. "What is it?"

"Nothing. I just suddenly remembered my parents…"

She leaned nearer to him. "The truth up in space, you didn't tell them, did you?"

A glazed expression passed his face. "No." He blinked and the expression was replaced by something unreadable. "Because I know it would not have mattered. I've always been given the story that I was a first generation Coordinator and I've always accepted that. Then up in space I found out I was something more than that…" He closed his eyes. "I don't feel any different than I used to. Nothing has changed in me. At first I thought I did, but come to think of it, nothing changed at all. I am still what I am. And so are you."

This made Cagalli smile, and she felt a tear well up in the corner of her eyes. The big crybaby had grown up to be the man sitting in front of her. His stay here on Earth had made him into what he was now. "You are right, Kira. When I first found out that you were my brother I started to ask myself what I was."

With this, Kira reached out and held her hand in his. "You will always be Cagalli Yula Attha. No matter what happens, you will always be you. And you will make your father proud of you when the time comes. Just remember, I will always be here for you."

"I know."

He nodded at her, then let go of her hand, once again starting to play with the candle with his finger. "In the meantime, while we are still here, let's enjoy everything. Don't worry about Orb, or anything that you don't need to think about. Right now, it's your life to live."

Cagalli almost cried as she watched her brother lovingly from across the table. She had always thought that he was weak, that he cried a lot, and that he always depended on other people for strength.

It was then did she realize that _she _was weak, just like him. And from him did she get her strength... Leaning over, she blew out the candle under his hand. "Come on, Kira. We don't need the cake. Let's go and walk along the lake and wait for the sun to set."

He looked at her, a bit surprised, but nodded and called for the check.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Dearka's little walk with Athrun eventually led them back to school and much to his disapproval, back to the gym. He was beginning to hate that place. It seemed like that place was cursed. Bad things always happened when they came close to it.

But Athrun insisted.

"We've made a breakthrough, Dearka. The MemS are machines that brought out regrets in your life, reacting with memories you wish to relive all over again because you feel like you can do better than how you've done it before. Right now, I just want to confirm everything."

The Buster Pilot frowned. "Why?"

"Because Yzak needs our help."

With this, Dearka fell silent. This fact was something he could not set aside. The light-haired Coordinator had been obsessed with these machines ever since he started going out with Kari. At the thought of the girl, Dearka frowned some more. Kari… she had always made him wonder who she really was. Yzak told him that He couldn't get to Kari's memories inside the MemS, and he knew that when Yzak wanted to get something, he was not going to stop until he did. He was crazy that way.

In fifteen minutes, both of them had taken their coats off and were now fiddling with the machine. Everything was going fine until the embodiment of evil came in blur of blond hair and green eyes.

He felt her before he saw her. She pounced on him while he was examining the memory chips on the first MemS unit and before he knew it, he was sprawled on the ground, face pressed against the cold pavement, with Fallon on his back.

"I found you!" she cried out triumphantly, waving her hands in the air.

"Get off me, you little witch!" Dearka screamed as knocked her off and scrambled to his feet.

Fallon did not seem to take offense on what he just said. Not wasting any time, she clung onto him like the little leech that he was. "You can't get away from me, and you know it."

Dearka opened his mouth to scream at her some more when Athrun's head popped out from under the first MemS unit. "What's going on?"

Dearka violently tried to shake Fallon off of his arm. "This is what's going on! She came out of nowhere and then suddenly harasses me! Get it off, Athrun!"

But Athrun was all business. Dearka had seen that look on Athrun's face before. He reserved that look for very serious occasions. "Grow up, both of you. I need your help here."

"Sure, Athrun, once I get rid of – "

"No, we need her. Let her stay."

Dearka's jaw almost hit the ground. "What? We need _her?_ Why? How?"

"Because we are going to perform a trial and error on why Kari can't use these machines. I'm guessing it has something to do with her being what she is. Genetically, I mean. So far, the only ones we've had try it out are Coordinators, with the exception of Miriallia, of course."

Dearka's heart skipped a beat at the mention of her name. It was then did he realize he hadn't spent that much time with her lately.

Fallon, however, was not helping. "I saw her with that cute guy with nice teeth earlier. They were together."

Something weird writhed inside Dearka's gut at the mention of this. "Yalin was with Miriallia earlier?"

Fallon nodded. "Yeah. They were really close, you know."

Dearka snarled at her. The last thing he needed as having Fallon put strange thoughts in his head. "Shut up! Now let go of me!" He was about to grab Fallon by the scruff of the neck when Athrun butted in.

"All right, you two. Stop it. Can you please stop and help me for a bit here?"

Fallon stuck out her tongue at Dearka.

It took him all his self control not to claw her eyes out.

Athrun worked on the next machine. "Kari is altered, according to Yzak."

Dearka scratched his head. "Okay, can you explain to me what the difference that has with us Coordinators?"

Athrun stared at him blandly. "Unlike us, she said she's had her physical features tweaked. She's simply that; _altered_. We on the other hand are _enhanced_." He picked up the bulky head gear and fiddled with a few switches on it. "But I don't see the logic on why Kari can't use these and we can. Yzak said the MemS boots him out of the system when he's about to breach Kari's memories… "

Fallon frowned, but nonetheless clung onto Dearka like a jellyfish. "Why do you need me?"

Athrun stared at her, as if seeing her for the first time. "You're a half-breed. Right now I'm just ready to try out some variety. Are you up to it? I want to try something."

He looked so determined that Dearka started to become interested. "What are you going to try?"

Athrun leaned over and detached something from the main unit, then showed the device to them both. "I'm removing the memory chip. Try getting to Fallon's memory without having to deal with the memories recorded in the memory chip. Can you do it?"

Dearka stared the device uncertainly, then at Fallon. For the first time, the girl looked scared.

_She doesn't want me in her head… _

Fallon swallowed hard. "Are you sure it's safe?"

Athrun nodded. "It has to be. Yzak's notes told me something about having to fight common experiences of those who have previously used the machine. When Kira and I used the machine before, I had to fight through Yzak's memories before I got through to Kira's. I'm assuming Kira went through the same thing then. But without this," he flipped the memory chip in his hand, "I think it will be all right."

Dearka felt strangely uneasy, and in a way he was happy Fallon was as uncertain about this as he was. But Yzak needed this… He nodded. "All right. I'll do it."

Athrun turned to Fallon. "How about you?"

She bit her lip slightly, but nodded anyway. "All right."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Miriallia gasped when she felt someone blow into her ear. Jumping back, she discovered it was just Lacus emerging from the frozen food section carrying a bag of French fries.

"You scared me!" she said.

Lacus giggled. "You look preoccupied, that's all. What are you thinking?" she asked as she deposited the bag into their shopping cart.

Now in reality, Miriallia did not want to talk about it, when she knew Lacus was finally happy. But it looked like the songstress wasn't going to let her off that easily. She smiled. "It's nothing. I was just thinking about Dearka. He received an email from his father about something he won't tell me."

Lacus tilted her head to the right and asked, "Is it bad news?"

"It looked like it. He was all nervous. He was telling me it was nothing and that it's better I don't know about it, but I can't get it out of my head."

Lacus nodded in understanding. "I guess you will always worry, so long as you are in love." They wheeled the cart off in search for toothpaste as she continued. "You worry about Dearka going back up to PLANT, aren't you?"

Milly opened her mouth to deny it, not wanting to appear too clingy, but she ended up nodding. "I don't want him to leave… "

Lacus smiled at her sadly. "I know you don't want him to leave. And chances are, he doesn't want to leave you, either. But you do know that he has to."

The truth was too painful to accept. But it was still the truth. "Yes." She grabbed a tube of toothpaste and threw it in the cart. "Every day I would keep on asking myself when he will go, and what will happen to us if – when – he finally leaves. He never tells me anything concerning his life up there, so I'm a bit unsure how we will ever be able to communicate with each other with the distance…"

With this, Lacus stopped pushing the cart right next to the condiment aisle. She placed a hand on Milly's shoulder and squeezed affectionately. "Milly, you are doubting him. You are starting to question if everything will be all right because of the distance. Trust in yourself, trust him and trust on your relationship. This is a small world. And with the improving relations between PLANT and Orb, I don't see anything that can prevent you from seeing each other once in a while."

Milly scratched her forehead irritably. She knew that what Lacus was saying was true, but she could not help but worry. "What if he meets someone up there? Or what if he forgets about me?"

Lacus shook her head. "You know deep down in your heart that Dearka couldn't do anything to screw up. He loves you. Everyone can see that except for you. Trust me, he won't mess around."

Miriallia looked at her doubtfully. "How would you know?"

With that, Lacus' expression wilted. "When you have lived all your life settling for anything that life gives you, and then suddenly have the greatest thing to ever happen to you happen, you won't want to let it go, Milly. I have not known Dearka that long, but having a father in the Council has taught me enough. I don't know if you've realized it, but Dearka never talks about his family."

That got Milly interested. "I've noticed that. I've always thought he just doesn't want to introduce me to his parents."

Lacus shook her head. "You are wrong. Dearka doesn't talk about his family, not because he doesn't want to, but because there really isn't much to tell." She reached out and grabbed a small bag of salt. "You've introduced him to your family before, right?"

The day when she had finally gotten to introduce Dearka to her parents flashed before her mind's eye, and that made her smile. "Yes. He loved them as they loved him."

Lacus nodded. "Not everyone had that privilege up in the PLANTs before. Majority of the youth who joined ZAFT have lost their families when Junius Seven fell. Adults had too many things to attend to then, and having been short in numbers, we weren't given that luxury to spend time with family. Except for the Coordinators who had settled in neutral colonies – Kira is a good example – people up in the PLANTs were too busy to stop and talk a while about what matters most, since what matters most to them have been destroyed along with Junius Seven. Athrun is a good example of that."

Miriallia bowed her head, somewhat ashamed. "I didn't know that."

"Of course you wouldn't know that. You were on a Neutral colony then. You were in Heliopolis." She pushed the cart along and continued with her small talk. "Now, I'm not making excuses for us being that way. There are also some people up in the PLANTs whose family ties mattered even more than position."

"Really?"

The songstress nodded. "Yes. Yzak and his mother are a good example of this." After she said this, her face scrunched up in thought. "It's weird having to know Yzak being so stubborn and self-centered then, yet having the best mother-son relationship I know… " She sighed. "Dearka's never had that kind of relationship with his dad, I suppose. I should know. My father and I hardly ever saw each other then…" She brushed the thought away as if it were an annoying fly. "But I guess what I am trying to say is that Dearka doesn't have a relationship with his father like you do with yours. The only way he could communicate with his father is by being his subordinate. So please understand."

And at that moment, at that specific time, Milly honestly felt incredibly selfish… She was worrying about the smallest of things, always thinking about herself, what would happen to _her _when Dearka leaves. Would he still remember _her_? _She _will be lonely. When all Dearka ever needed was a father…

"I understand. Thanks, Lacus." And she really did.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

There wasn't anything he could do for her. She was not crying as much as she was when he first found her, but it still made him feel utterly helpless. He did not like the feeling. He was Yzak Jule! He always knew what to do!

Except for today.

He had rummaged through the piles and piles of papers that were cluttered around Kari then, and in all honesty, it had given his head a quick roller coaster ride. Tons upon tons of documents named after her at a date she should not have been alive yet littered the whole room, along with some research papers that were also under her name. Kari couldn't move then, repeating _"who am I?" _over and over again as her eyes scanned the place as if hoping to find an answer.

Yzak had opted on taking her out of that wretched house and to his dorm. That seemed to have done the trick, although he had practically carried her all the way there. She could not seem to stand straight, and would once in a while shiver as if cold that he had to wrap an arm around her to keep her from breaking down.

Right now he was sitting on the couch with Kari lying down next to him in a tight ball, her knees to her chest, her head resting on his lap. He had stoked her hair on occasion and tried to talk to her, until she finally fell asleep.

For once he was not at all worried for Athrun or Dearka to walk in on him. Right now, he desperately needed someone to talk to… He didn't know how to absorb all the things he had seen in the Takano residence. Who is Kari anyway? Who is she?

Looking down at the girl lying down on his lap, he sighed in frustration. Why is it that when he had finally started caring for someone, that someone happened to have a lot of complications? He brushed back Kari's hair, and looked down at her closed eyes. She looked so beautiful to him that at this very moment, he knew that he didn't care no matter what her complication was. It didn't matter to him at all. Not when it came to Kari

Not really knowing what to do, now that she was asleep, his eyes wandered to the package he had received from PLANT he had abandoned on the center table in front of him. Casting his sleeping girlfriend a look, he gently eased off the couch and placed a throw pillow under her head, then settled on the floor instead. He fingered the thin package and after a moment ripped open the shock proof wrapper finally. Much to his surprise, it was a laptop from his mother…

Yzak looked over to the sleeping Kari and frowned. He wanted to talk to her about everything that she had uncovered in that room… _everything. _The mystery was starting to annoy him. All he ever wanted was to get to know his girlfriend! Was that too much to ask?

He gave Kari's hair one final stroke before standing up and hurrying to his room to retrieve something that Kari had given to him not too long ago.

It was the disc of the war game she had helped develop.

Returning to the living room and opening his new laptop, it only took a minute to configure everything and it was finally ready for use. Not wasting any time, he settled once again on the floor, touched Kari's forehead for a brief moment, and then inserted the disc in the drive.

The game's graphics never seemed to cease to amaze him. The detail was impressive and even though he had played the game for over a hundred times before, it was only then did he notice that he still hadn't gotten tired of it. But maybe that was because he still hasn't friggin' won it yet.

He had tried everything, but the game was just too realistic to be won.

He decided to play it while waiting for Kari to wake up so that they could talk. Unfortunately, an hour and three losses after, Kari was still sound asleep. Restarting the stupid yet strangely addictive game, he watched as the beautiful graphics unfolded in front of him, making him grind his teeth in frustration. He had done everything… everything! But it still wasn't working.

Leaning back on the sofa as he waited for the FMV to play out, he felt a cool touch on the back of his neck and he looked over his shoulder to see Kari's drowsy green eyes looking at him. He whirled around where he was sitting on the floor and placed a hand on the side of her head.

"Hello there," was what she said.

Yzak tried to bite back a snap, but was not able to succeed. "Took you long enough. I've been waiting for hours."

She smiled, even though Yzak knew she barely felt like smiling. "I'm sorry… Thank you for coming for me…"

"I was worried," he grumbled under his breath, blushing slightly. "You didn't show up last night… I thought… " He paused in the middle of his sentence, then continued in a snarl. "You stood me up!"

Kari furrowed her brow and pushed herself into a sitting position. "I'm truly sorry, Yzak. Please don't be mad at me…"

Feeling strangely guilty, Yzak bit his lip and mumbled something about not being mad at all.

Kari touched her hand to her forehead. "I was looking for documents from my mother's compilations for my thesis back-up yesterday… And I went into that room… and I found… so many things…"

The Duel pilot frowned. "I saw those many documents. Were they yours?"

"They can't possibly me mine… They were dated about eight years before I was born." She closed her eyes shut before opening them again, as if trying to rid herself of some unpleasant thought. "I read through them. I don't remember ever writing anything I found there… But they have my name on them all… "

"If you don't know those documents, then why are they there?" Yzak asked.

Kari looked at him straight in the eye. "My mother keeps them…"

Of course in normal circumstances, Yzak would not have cared. He didn't have the patience these kinds of things, and his heart was telling him that this meant a lot to Kari… He sat down next to her. "Have you asked your mother about this?"

Kari shook her head. "She won't tell me anything… She never does… But I know she must know something… " She turned to him again. "Yzak…? Who am I? _What _am I?"

The Duel pilot ran a hand through his hair. Everything was not making any sense to him. "Dammit! If only we could use the MemS… " He turned to her. "Are you feeling all right?"

Kari's eyes slowly met his, as if searching his face intently for the answer. After a while, she nodded. "I am now." She leaned over and settled to lying back down on his lap.

Yzak looked down at her, slightly embarrassed. He thumbed at her hair gently. "How's your head?" he asked gruffly, listening to her sigh in contentment as his fingers massaged her scalp.

"The ringing won't go away… But I'm getting used to it."

"You're not supposed to get used to it. I don't want you getting used to it."

Kari looked up at him serenely. "I can't help it, Yzak… Ever since we got back from Orb, the headaches haven't gone away."

And Yzak felt his heart clench painfully in his chest. So this was how it felt to be helpless, to not be able to do anything when you were so used to always having your way. He closed his eyes in frustration.

_I want to make them go away…_

He felt a hand touch the side of his face and his eyes fluttered open. Kari was smiling up at him, white teeth peeking out of pink lips. "I know you want them to go away…"

It hadn't been for a long time since she had impressed upon him how well she could read people. He had forgotten how it used to annoy him to death every time she did it to him. But for some weird reason, he found himself smiling right now. The smile felt stiff on his face. He could not remember ever smiling at her. He was always so bland, if not scowling at her. It made him wonder what she ever saw in him.

Her smile widened. "I don't need to see your smile to know you're happy." She closed her eyes cheerfully. "You look handsome when you smile, though."

Yzak scowled immediately, embarrassed. "Shut up."

She laughed gaily, but her laugh died immediately when she gazed up at him again. "Do I make you happy?"

Yzak snarled at her. "What kind of freaking question is that?"

"It's just a question. I wanted to know."

Yzak blushed even more. He turned away from her. "You know me more that I do myself. Why do you have to ask me when you already know the answer to it?"

Her hand touching his cheek guided his face back to look at her. Serious green eyes met his blue ones. "Because I want to know without having to read you. I want to know straight from you, if I make you happy."

And they were silent, staring at each other for minutes before Yzak leaned his head back and stared at the ceiling, taking her hand in his before finally speaking. "Now you listen and you'd better listen good, because I'm never saying this ever again."

He took a deep breath and braced himself for the speech that had been lingering in his mind for so long now, but was not able to find the perfect opportunity to say it. "When I met you, I hated you with all my heart. You were always there, everywhere I go. You try so hard to hack into my life and you drag me to places I don't even want to be in. You read me like an open book when I tell you straight out you should stop doing it…"

He felt her hand twitch in his as if to pull away, but he held on. "But even when I felt like I didn't want you around, some force just wouldn't let me stay away. When I was about to leave for the PLANTs, I had called you the last minute to see how you were, even when I didn't know what to say and I'd probably just yell at you like I always do. And then you were suddenly there… You were sitting on the floor of the airport. And even when I tried so hard not to admit it, I felt happy."

"I didn't want you to leave…" she murmured softly

Yzak raised his head and looked down at her. She had her eyes closed, but he knew she was listening. "I didn't want to leave."

She nodded weakly. "I knew."

"You always do." He traced one of her brows with his forefinger. "You make me happy. I didn't know I would be able to find someone who I would care for, more than I do myself."

Kari squeezed his hand gently, then pressed his palm to her lips. "I'm glad… you are… happy…" and with that, she fell asleep again.

Yzak watched her irritably. He had practically poured his heart out to her, and she sleeps on him! Sniffing in annoyance, he looked around the room for something to do while waiting for Kari to wake up. His eyes fell upon his new laptop which sat forgotten on the center table. The game had loaded already, and much to irritation, the game's main menu was flashing at him with the same question it always asked him when he started playing.

_The enemy hovers close by while waiting for your move. What would you like to do? DEPLOY MOBILE SUITS. FIRE MISSILES. CALL OF REINFORCEMENTS… _The list just went on and on

Biting his tongue to keep him from cursing, he reached for his laptop, careful not to wake Kari up, and sat the device on the armrest of the couch to his right. Guiding the cursor lazily around the screen, he pressed on _FIRE MISSILES_. The next question popped out for him to answer again.

_How many missiles would you like to deploy? Enter number: _

Yzak blinked a bit, studied the blinking cursor where he was supposed to enter the number of missiles he would like to launch.

The tough part about this game, you see, is that every time he would fire at the enemy, they would retaliate tenfold. And since he was always the one who was required to strike first, it was hard not to get the most of their attacks.

Yzak frowned as he thought about a new strategy once more. Tapping the finger of his free hand on his lips while his other hand continued to stroke Kari's hair, he looked at the monitor of his laptop, watching the cursor blink rapidly, waiting for him to put a number in for his initial attack. He did not even know how long he'd spent staring at it, not even minding most of his ranks running around and requesting for a discharge.

And suddenly, out of nowhere, a thought hit him.

Looking down at Kari peacefully sleeping on his lap, he touched her forehead with his thumb, and then turned to the monitor again, his fingers hovering over the keyboard slowly, until he finally found the right key. He reread the question again.

_How many missiles would you like to deploy? Enter number: _

Yzak bit his lip and pressed the _zero _button on the keyboard.

And his eyes widened as he watched the screen go blank, until finally, small, plain block letters appeared in the middle of the screen.

_Congratulations. You have won._

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_It was the weirdest feeling ever. It felt like he was floating, and at the same time looking though someone else's eyes. It made him feel utterly dizzy, and everything was so vivid as if he had seen this happen before, but in a different perspective…_

_The last thing he could remember seeing was an explosion that shook the whole of Heliopolis, making the civilians scramble in panicked disarray. It didn't take very long for the alarms to ring out and the orders to hurry to the shelters nearest you to sound off, and his subconscious floated lazily right next to a blond girl with sharp green eyes._

Fallon…

_The half-Coordinator's head shot up when someone grabbed her roughly by the arm. It was a girl with reddish-blond hair and bright blue eyes. She had a look of terror in her pretty face as she hugged Fallon to her. "Don't you scare us like that! Mom is having a fit with you running off like that!"_

_"I'm sorry, Tanya… " Fallon murmured as she pulled away from the girl. "Where is mom?"_

_"The shelters at this sector are full… She's pleading that they let you in at least."_

_Fallon's face scrunched up in agony. "I don't want to leave without you and mom!"_

_Tanya gave her a stern look, and was about to say something when another explosion rocked the colony once more. Fallon screamed and hugged the older girl tightly. _

_"Don't be stubborn. Mom and I will go to the next sector's shelter and we will meet with you in Orb, all right? Don't give me that look! This is no time to be stupid, Fallon!"_

_"But… but…"_

_Out of nowhere, a beautiful lady flew down from the building and gathered the two girls in a tight embrace._

_And with this Dearka gasped, the eyes of his subconscious floating over the three who were locked in a tight embrace. He could not believe what he was seeing…! _

_The woman had strawberry-blond hair reaching down to the back of her knees, and an oval angelic face that he could never forget.. _

_She was older, and taller, and her eyes were a dazzling blue… but Dearka could never make a mistake about something like this… If he didn't know any better, he'd say the woman looked like Kari…!_

_He watched as the woman dragged a screaming Fallon to the nearest shelter and she had to force her into the hatch kicking and screaming._

_"No! No! I don't want you to leave! Don't leave me here!" Fallon cried as the woman who looked like Kari tried to push her inside. _

_"Fallon, sweetheart. This is no time to disobey your mother. Go in and I and your sister will be on the next sector's shelter. Do you understand?"_

_Fallon shook her head and threw her arms around the woman's neck. "I'm scared! Don't leave me alone!"_

_"You're not alone, Fallon. There will be other people who will take good care of you until we finally meet back in Orb. All right?"_

_Fallon shook her head. "It's not all right!"_

_Her voice was drowned by another explosion, this time closer to them than before. The woman kissed Fallon on the cheek. "We'll meet you back on Earth. Behave yourself or daddy will be mad at you."_

_At the mention of her daddy, Fallon's face lit up. "Will daddy be meeting us on Earth?"_

_The woman looked at her hesitantly, then nodded. "Yes, sweetie. He will. Now get in the shelter."_

_Dearka's subconscious followed Fallon inside the shelter and watched as she waved at her family as the hatch closed. He watched her cry as a man led her to a seat and strapped her in. _

_And then he felt his body floating upward, floating until Fallon became smaller and smaller to him. He felt his mind go blank and all the colors swirled in a blur of grays and greens and blues and suddenly everything went black…_

…and Dearka slowly opened his eyes and gingerly took off the headgear of the MemS before sitting up. It did not take him too long to realize that everything about him was heavy. He blinked a couple of times to get everything into focus and saw Athrun looking down at him.

"You've been in there for a long time. What happened?" the Justice pilot asked.

Dearka opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted when he heard a sharp gasp coming from somewhere to his right. Looking up, he saw Fallon's tear-stained face, those eyes looking at him reproachfully, a hurt expression marring her features. Her shoulders were shaking as she started to back away from him. He did not know why, but he suddenly felt her pain. He ripped the straps on his arms and stood up, taking a step towards Fallon. The girl backed away another step.

"You…" she whispered. "You were there… I saw you! I saw through your eyes! You were responsible why Heliopolis got destroyed! I saw you through your own eyes!" she screamed at him accusingly.

Dearka did not know what to say. He reached out to her and she recoiled from his hand. "Fallon, wait… "

She shook her head. "You were one of them! You and your kind were responsible for everything! I lost _everything _because of you! My sister and my mother! I lost them because of you! I hate you! _I hate you all!_" And with that, she turned around and ran, nearly stumbling but not really caring. Within seconds she was out of the gym and nowhere in sight.

For a few moments, Dearka and Athrun were silent, until Dearka finally spoke. "Athrun, Does Kari have an older sister by any chance?"

Athrun looked at him, confused. "I don't know… Why?"

Dearka remembered Fallon's mother and instantly shuddered. _Where Fallon and Kari related?_

"It's nothing…"

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_**Oh! An update from Yuugiri and it hasn't even been a month yet! XD**_

**_This chapter somewhat advances the plot and I know you are finally hinting on what's happening. This it too serious for my taste. I'll have to make the next chapter a breather for everyone. I LOVE HAPPY CHAPTERS!_**

**_Also, I would like to advertise here that I have succeeded in relocating my website to Geocities and is now looking quite all right now. If you are interested, you may visit me there by going to my profile and clicking on my homepage. I put up some fanart of TIH and a cute baby Athrun and Cagalli piccie. _**

**_Anyway, Yuugiri is feeling a lot better now! And admittedly, it's all because of you! When I was feeling down, and most of you tried to cheer me up with your reviews, I couldn't help but smile. Now normally, I answer my reviews in general, but because I felt all better because of you, I felt like I owed you each a personal appreciation. So I started a journal that answers to all your reviews for my previous chapter. You may view it by going to my profile and clicking on the link I posted there (posted there twice for some reason…0.o) or you can access it from my website and clicking on "Yuugiri reaches out" on the navi._**

_**Wow, this author's note is getting too long, so I guess I'll cut it here before you finally realize I am distracting you from killing me because I left another cliffie!**_

_**Cliffies rock! XD**_


	36. Phase 36: A Visit From Murrue

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam SEED.**_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

The last two weeks of school had been pure torture for Yzak. For one, exams were coming soon, and the professors of Abashiri University had decided to dedicate their existence to making their lives a living hell. Another cause for his misery was the beautiful Phantom sitting on the floor across from him, nose buried in her book of Art of War, while slipping into her mouth a red M and M.

Yzak gritted his teeth impatiently as he flipped the page of his own book noisily, unconsciously trying to catch her attention. It was not working. They had never gotten the chance to talk about anything that happened in the Takano residence because of the upcoming exams, and the mere thought of it made him so frustrated it made him want to tear his hair out.

Because of this fact that she wouldn't find the time to talk to him about it, his thoughts had started to wander at things he had almost completely forgotten about in the past week. One was the constant jealous nagging he had at the pit of his stomach every time he would remember what Kian said about Kari

_"You made her fall in love with you. You, a Coordinator… You always make things worse for my family. Why do you always have to show up and take them away from me?"_

_"She denied everyone in her family just to be with him… and now you are going to do it all over again. Leave her alone! **Just fucking leave her alone!**"_

A constant nagging. It had been nearly a month since that talk with Kari's crazy brother, but every time it would cross his mind, he could not help but feel undeniably uncomfortable at the possibility that Kari may have had a boyfriend before him, however irrational it may seem to be.

Another matter that was bothering him was when Dearka had asked him over a dozen times if he was positively sure Kari did not have an older sister or a close relative. Every time he would say no and press upon the issue why he was asking such a thing, the Buster pilot would simply clam up and tell him it was not that important.

It took all of his self control not to strangle the blonde Coordinator then.

It was as if the mystery surrounding his girlfriend was thickening as the days passed. And it seems like Dearka knew something but was not telling him anything.

"You know," Kari started. "Flip your book any harder and the pages will fall off." She looked over to him with those green orbs of hers and smiled her sweet smile. It didn't fool Yzak one bit. He knew her head was still aching. He would still notice her thumbing her temples unconsciously when she thought he wasn't looking.

And Yzak couldn't take it anymore. "I'm taking you to a doctor today, and you can't say no."

This made his girlfriend's eyes widen, but she recovered in an instant. She always does. "The doctor? For what?"

Yzak stared at her incredulously. "Your head, what else!"

She tilted her head to the right inquiringly. "But I'm fine."

"You're also a freaking liar."

Kari laughed melodiously. "I'm fine, Yzak."

This silenced the Duel pilot. Perhaps it was the way she said his name, as if punctuating the conversation to an end. She had mastered that skill for the past months of them being together．It annoyed the heck out of him, that skill of hers to do that without even trying.

Looking down at his book to avoid staring at her evilly, he decided that with Kari, he was most likely never going to win. He was already starting to feel slightly grumpy when he felt something cool on his forehead. Looking up, his eyes met hers and found that she had inched closer to him without him knowing it, and her forefingers were touching his forehead from under his bangs.

"Now what do you want?" he snarled, face heating up as he looked away from her.

"Thank you for caring," was all she said, before sitting back down on her place on the floor and once again burying her face in her book.

After a few moments of waiting for her to get fully absorbed in her reading, he took the advantage to look at her. Strawberry blonde locks covered her eyes as she constantly flipped through her book as if nothing else ever existed. The loose yellow shirt modestly falling over her worn out jeans. The way she would touch the tip of her nose when she would pause to read more on a certain page. He watched her like a hawk, and he didn't even know why. But watching her was so entertaining to him, and in some occasions educational, even.

Until he finally gets caught.

"Yzak, why are you staring at me again?"

Yzak nearly jumped and once again started getting overly defensive. "None of your damn business… "

She laughed at him again.

Yzak was about to snap at her once more when the door of the dorm room opened and admitted a laughing Miriallia and a very flushed Dearka, who, at the sight of Yzak, grinned naughtily. Both were lugging around heavy-looking backpacks and some hard bound books obviously checked out from the University library.

"Here early, I see," Miriallia said as she closed the door behind them then took off her shoes. "I thought the group study wasn't until ten."

Yzak watched as Kari looked up to the couple.

"We had nothing better to do so we went straight here. I brought chocolate."

Yzak felt his left cheek twitch involuntarily. It was once again Cagalli's brilliant idea of having a group study for that day. Much to his displeasure, Kari was ecstatic. As she was finally finishing up on her thesis which Yzak had dedicated about two thirds of his free time to help her with, she said she would find it entirely helpful to interview Kira and the rest for more information. Kira said they won't mind, but when he found out that he himself had to be there in their little study date, he nearly ran off to a very far away place before Kari did her magic on him and convince him to come. Of course, it was a losing battle. Kari only had to look at him, and he was gone.

"We got some drinks and a few snacks," Dearka announced as he deposited a brown paper bag on the living room center table. "This looks neat. I've never been to a group study before."

Yzak stared at his friend dryly. He had a feeling it was going to be a very, very long day.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Dearka watched as Milly busied herself in the kitchen, preparing several glasses and plates for later. In all honesty, he had been looking forward to this group study because it was an opportunity to get to think about something else other than the daily news he received from the PLANTs from his father. One, because the news always made him worry, and two, it made Miriallia upset.

And he hated it when she was upset.　He could easily tell when she was. She would try very hard not to meet his eye, and then try extra hard to laugh when he would tell a joke. Although she never admitted it, he knew that she couldn't help but worry. Miriallia was simply… well… Miriallia.

"Do you need any help?" he asked as he walked towards her and rested his hands on her waist. Miriallia instantly leaned against him.

"I'm good." She continued to arrange the glasses around and around the tray. Another sign she was nervously trying to act busy.

Resting his chin on her shoulder, he slinked his arms around her waist. "Do you need to tell me something?" he asked.

She stiffened in his arms instantly, and tried to cover it up with a laugh. "Of course not."

"You aren't yourself at all, you know."

"It's probably the upcoming exams and all." Her hands finally stopped playing with the glasses and she turned to face him. Her eyes, those deep blue, beautiful eyes searched his intently. After a few seconds, she blinked. "What's up?"

Dearka blinked back. "Nothing." He found his mind wandering back to his father's email. He had to shake his head a bit. It annoyed him, every time he would think about it, because he knew it bothered Miriallia that he didn't tell her anything that concerned this issue. But he had a mild feeling that she knew what they were about.

Right then and there, he decided that he will not make Milly suffer much about it today, so he decided to change the subject. He leaned his forehead against hers, startling her. "Dinner in town after this study group thing?"

His girlfriend's eyes widened a bit. He knew why. It was probably the first time he had initiated a date out. She smiled then and nodded, which made Dearka's heart flutter slightly. "I'd love that."

Good. Another reason why he wanted her alone later tonight was he needed to talk to her about Fallon, who, strange as it may sound, seemed to have decided to stay away from him for the last two weeks. Now in normal circumstances, he would be thanking whatever gods he knew and believed in for that wonderful, wonderful fact that finally the little leech decided to finally leave him be. But right now, he was more worried than anything else.

He had seen through the girl's eyes, felt her pain, and in a way, he even thought he understood her. And he was one of the reasons for her pain, even though he had been rationalizing over and over again ever since he found out about her past that he was merely doing his job.

But apart for all the guilt that had washed over him, nothing could possibly have thrown him off the loop more than the fact that Fallon's mother resembled his best friend's girlfriend. Not only once had he asked Yzak if he ever knew if Kari had an older sister, or a cousin or an aunt… He always got the same answer; No. And then Yzak would try to wrestle out of him the reason why he kept on asking him that question. But he could not bring himself to tell him why. One, because he knew that Yzak was bound to overreact for something he was still unsure of, since it had something to do with Kari. And two, because he knew he could most likely be a coincidence, since Kari, he knew was altered and her appearance could simply have been patterned upon the physical features of an existing individual.

Another thing that was bothering him with Kari and Fallon's mother's appearance was that Fallon seemed to not react to Kari at all. He wondered why that was, if Kari did resemble her mother. Perhaps he saw wrong? But he couldn't possibly be…

Miriallia pulled away from him, looking a lot happier than earlier. "Where shall we eat?"

Dearla snapped back to reality and smiled. "Would you like some ramen for later? It's been really cold lately."

She giggled, and he felt slightly pleased to make her happy. "Ramen sounds nice."

"Good. It's a date then." He gave her a loving squeeze and looked up when he heard Yzak snarled loudly from the living room.

"I don't like M and M's, dammit!"

Dearka frowned slightly at the direction where Yzak's protests were coming. This Kari mystery was getting to him… He needed to find out the answers to this.

_For Yzak's sake…_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Kira stared down at the thin silver ring he held between his thumb and forefinger and found himself smiling. He was sitting on the bottom steps of the University library, polishing the ring Lacus had given him way back up in space, waiting for his girlfriend who was returning an overdue book back inside. He could not help but grin down at the lopsided reflection of his face on the piece of jewelry he seemed to value more than anything he owned all together. When he heard the door of the library open, he hurriedly slipped it on the ring finger of his left hand and stood up immediately to greet the pink haired songstress.

"All settled?"

She nodded enthusiastically. "Yes. Shall we go?"

Kira nodded as they started walking around the University Gym towards the small, squat building where they hadn't been to for almost a week now. The gang had planned a group study in an hour, but they had planned to visit the orphanage before meeting up with the rest. Mrs. Lao had been telling them that Eiko had been throwing tantrums every night for the past three days because "Big Brother Kira" and "Princess Lacus" hadn't been dropping off to visit them to tell them a story as much as before.

However guilty he was at that fact, things for the past two days after all the fiddling with the MemS had been more than stressful for all of them, what with examinations coming up. Everyone in school seemed to be in a hurry in submitting late projects and the teachers had been demanding more from them that Kira had barely gotten by with his advanced Computer Engineering class. Athrun was no exception. Lacus, too.

Come to think of it, Lacus had been on her hands and knees with due projects for Modern Art and Cagalli had been so tied up with her Political Science subjects that this was probably the first time in a while since they all got to send time together. Milly had been preoccupied with her Photography class and Yzak and Kari both with Art of War. Dearka… well, Dearka didn't look like he was having any problems with his subjects. But that was easily compensated with the fact that he still looked extremely disturbed for some weird reason he didn't tell anyone.

"I wonder how everyone is in the orphanage… I hope Eiko isn't too upset." Lacus swung her arms loosely as she looked up into the morning sky. The sun was shining brightly that day, yet the wind was blowing cold from the mountains. The weather bothered Lacus little. She was actually the only one not complaining about the rapid weather change.

Kira reached out and grabbed her swinging hand, making her look over to him with a shy grin. "I'm sure she is looking forward to seeing you," he said.

Lacus stuck out her tongue. "Or you. The child adores you to the point of marrying you!"

Kira blinked absentmindedly then shrugged. "I'd rather marry you," he blurted out, surprising himself, and making Lacus stare at him in awe. "I mean… well… you know…"

Lacus was not about to let it go. She peered up at him while they continued to walk "You have always struck me as the family man, Mr. Yamato."

He felt his face heat up at the direction of the conversation. Ever since the war, parents have been setting up their children for arranged marriages, be they Coordinator or Natural, for some reason Kira never really got to understand. He had known people his age betrothed to another: Athrun, Lacus, Sai… Fllay.

But never in his life did he think his parents had planned anything like that with him. Or at least as far as he knew. He scratched his head as Lacus continued to smile up at him. His eyes widened at the realization that she was serious. "I have always struck you as a family man?"

She giggled at that. "I see you as a good father, at least that's for sure. The way you deal with kids, and how you can always put them in order." She nodded in emphasis and stared straight ahead, a small smile playing on her lips. "I bet you would be a good father."

Nothing could have embarrassed him more than that. He almost tripped on his own feet. "Lacus!"

"What? You should take that as a compliment."

He did not know how to take that, really. Given that Lacus thinks of him as a promising father, he did not know how to ask her what he thought of him as –

"Of course that would mean you would be a great husband," Lacus suddenly exclaimed, gesturing at him with her free hand while squeezing his fingers.

Kira blushed even more and was about to open his mouth to protest until they turned the corner to the orphanage and spotted a familiar looking girl he believed he hadn't seen much of for the last couple of weeks.

There, sitting on the orphanage's front doorstep, was none other than Fallon Bryaritt, her chin resting on her knees, legs pulled close to her chest and hands playing with something she quickly hid inside her pocket the moment she saw them. Her huge green eyes widened even more when she saw them approach.

Lacus, as usual, greeted her with a smile. "Hello there. It's been a while since we've seen you. How are you?"

Kira, on the other hand, did not say anything. Personally, he didn't like the girl, but neither did he hate her. But apart from everything she had caused Dearka and Miriallia, and perhaps even Cagalli since his sister was the one who took her here, he did not feel anything about her. She was merely… _there. _

Fallon looked away with a humph. "It's none of your business. Leave me alone."

Kira, as calm and as passive as he might be though, did not like it that this girl was talking to Lacus in such a manner. He frowned. "Can't you be a bit ruder?"

Fallon blinked and looked over to him, green eyes meeting lavender ones, and with that, she instantly flushed in anger. There was something in her eyes– Kira could not put his finger into it – that flashed the moment it landed on his face. "I can be, especially to you." She stood up and nearly knocked Kira over had he not moved away from her fast enough. Her eyes... those eyes… blazed as she narrowed them at Kira. However small Fallon was compared to the Freedom pilot, he could not believe someone could contain such hate towards another.

But the next thing that came out of her mouth made his blood run cold.

"You should have done everything in your power to save Heliopolis," she hissed, and Kira saw her clench her fist inside her pocket, obviously tightening her grip on whatever she had hidden there. And with that, she shoved Kira and bolted away, but not after shouting over her shoulder a loud, _"Next time, if you decide to play the hero, make sure you will win."_

Lacus gasped and Kira saw the horror and worry in her face at what Fallon said. And at that moment, he knew what she was thinking. Shaking his head ruefully, trying to shove down the melancholic feelings away, he brushed a finger across her cheek. He opened his mouth to say something, but the wind was knocked out of him when something very small and very fast burst out of the door of the orphanage and instantly barreled down to tackle him around the waist.

"Eiko!" he cried loudly as he recovered quickly and picked the brown-haired girl under her arms and twirled her around twice, making her giggle happily.

"Big brother Kira is finally here to see me!" Eiko exclaimed when Kira finally put her down and patted her on the head. Eiko turned to the songstress next. "And princess Lacus too! Both of you are here!"

Uncertainly, Lacus' concerned blue eyes wandered away from Kira and smiled down at Eiko lovingly as she took the child into her arms. "I've missed you."

"Not as much as I've missed you, Princess Lacus!" she said and hugged Princess Lacus tightly. "Are you married yet?" Kira laughed. Eiko looked up at him. "Big brother Kira, you're getting taller!"

Kira laughed even more. "Am I really?" With a swift move, he once again picked up Eiko and sat her on his shoulder. "But Eiko is taller than me now!"

Eiko squealed happily as her tiny hands instantly grabbed handfuls of his brown, over grown hair. "Yay!"

Kira ignored the look on Lacus' face that showed how worried she still was about what Fallon said earlier. Moving forward and barely noticing Eiko pulling painfully at his scalp, he kissed his beautiful girlfriend's cheek, making the child go, _"Uuuuuy!"_

"I love you," Kira whispered in Lacus' ear before pulling away. "Don't worry."

Lacus, startled at his gesture, recovered quickly and nodded, although Kira could still see the slight tingle of worry in her eyes as she touched the side of his face affectionately.

Satisfied that at least she was smiling, he started to march up the orphanage where he could hear the other children making a loud racket at the knowledge that cool, tall big brother Kira had finally dropped by to visit and probably tell them a story.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Cagalli looked over to Athrun who appeared by her elbow in the crowded side walk leading up to the Tento Area.　The justice pilot was not looking at her, but she knew what he was thinking. _You're overreacting again, Cagalli…_

Bur she swore she was him… She could not make a mistake about something so serious.

"It was Kian, Athrun. It was Kian."

Of course, Athrun did not believe her. He was that kind of person who would not believe anything unless he saw it himself. He nodded anyway. "Kian is in Higashimokoto, Cagalli. He isn't here. And I don't think he would be coming back here anytime soon." He sounded pretty much as he had sounded half an hour ago. Athrun hated being late, which they already were for the group study.

Cagalli frowned. She knew Athrun was right, but still…

She had seen the boy when they had exited the Bakery after grabbing a dozen or so cupcakes for the group study in the boy's dorms. The red hair gave him away. Cagalli was sure it was Kian, Kari's crazy brother, sitting in the backseat of a taxi waiting for traffic to move. She saw him for a mere second, but the moment those green, fluid eyes landed on her amber ones, the taxi rolled off and rounded the curb where she practically ran to catch up.

But the moment she got to the road where the taxi disappeared, Kian was no where to be found.

_I'm sure it's Kian. I can't make a mistake about that. _

She felt hands grip her shoulders and she let them lead her up the road to the dorms. "Cagalli, let's go. We are late for nearly an hour now. They are already waiting for us." She was still slightly distracted when they finally got there, and discovered that they were the last ones to arrive.

Lacus greeted her with a hug. "You are late. I thought you weren't showing up."

Dearka popped up beside her and stole the brown paper bag full of cupcakes from her hand. "Finally something to eat. Everyone has pretty much closed their books waiting for you guys to show up."

Cagalli eyed him suspiciously. Right now, she hated Dearka. He was the only one who was not having a hard time with his subject. "And I suppose you are happy to see me because of the food."

Dearka smiled toothily. "Nonsense! I'm equally happy to see you too." He did not look like it, though. He dashed off to the kitchen where Miriallia was coming out of.

Athrun wandered from her side and Cagalli followed him with her eyes. She was slightly pleased to see her boyfriend sit on the floor in front of Kira and Yzak who were busy reading their own books. She did not believe Kira and Athrun ever got the chance to talk about whatever happened two weeks ago. But nonetheless, she found it entirely satisfying that they were in good terms.

The princess of Orb felt Lacus give her a slight nudge. "You look like you have a lot of things in your mind right now."

Cagalli looked back at her, opened her mouth to say something but instantly closed it again. She did not want to make Lacus think she was overreacting too. Kian can't possibly be in Abashiri. She shook her head. "Political Science saturating my brain, that's all." Her eyes met Kari's from across the room and she blinked when the mysterious girl smiled at her. Those eyes. So much like Kian's.

That guy she saw… can't possibly be him…

_Can he?_

She didn't know, but she was going to find out about it today. She bowed her head politely and Kari bowed back.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Miriallia listened to the silent flipping of pages as she took a bite out of her second cupcake that hour. After Cagalli and Athrun had finally arrived an hour late, all eight of them had arranged themselves on the carpeted floor in a circle, a bowl of M and M's in the middle along with their books and notes and laptops.

What Miriallia liked about group studies, is that you were always so motivated to learn because everyone around you shared your same desire to absorb as much of their textbooks for the big examinations this coming week.

Everything was actually going real well… until Cagalli's crazy streak hit her again after getting a drink from the kitchen and refilling the bowl of M and M's. She came back with something that made her and Lacus gasp in horror.

Instead of returning the bowl of Kari's chocolates in their circle, she gently placed a half empty ketchup bottle on its side and sat back down on her place in the circle.

Yzak looked up from his book and hissed violently. Kira almost gagged. Athrun went pale. Kari blinked at the bottle curiously. Dearka nearly jumped out of the circle and Miriallia found Lacus nervously looking at her.

Yzak, as usual, was the first to violently react. "What the freaking heck are you up to now, Attha?"

Miriallia felt her blood run cold. She knew exactly what Cagalli was up to. She wanted to play that horrid game of…. _Oh, dear… _

Spin the Bottle.

She had demanded to play that game with them before. It was not a good game.

"My brain is fried. Let's take a break from all of this studying and take a few minutes and a few spins with the ketchup bottle of truth," Cagalli coaxed good-naturedly.

Athrun moved to stand.

"Siddown, Athrun, "Cagalli snapped at him.

Athrun shrugged and went back sitting in his place.

Miriallia gasped at her tone. If she didn't know any better, she'd think Cagalli had something in mind.

Miriallia uncomfortably lowered her book to the ground and tilted her head to the right. "What's wrong, Cagalli?"

"It's not everyday we get to be together like this. It would be fun to play a few round of truth or dare, don't you think so?"

Silence. It was obvious no one wanted to play.

Miriallia did not really know what Cagalli was up to, but this was just too out of the blue, even for Cagalli. She watched the princess look around the circle, her eyes momentarily darting back to Kari a few times before moving on.

Miriallia leaned forward and was about to tell her that they would be better off playing something else - as it seemed Kira, Dearka and Athrun were looking pretty sick as it is, and Yzak looked like he was going to explode – when someone suddenly knocked on their door.

Looking over her shoulder to the door, everyone but Cagalli moved to get it, as if looking for a good enough excuse to get out of that circle. Miriallia, who was nearest to the door, got to it first.

The sight that beheld her when she opened the door made her heart flutter to her throat. She could not believe at the degree of happiness she felt then, and was supposed to speak out but was immediately drowned with Kira, Lacus and Cagalli crowding behind her.

"Murrue!" Kira cried happily as he forced the door open wildy.

And there was no mistaking it. There, standing tall and elegant, in an a-line dress and her considerably longer brown hair tied back in a loose ponytail, was none other than the former captain of the legged ship Archangel, Murrue Ramius.

She looked startled to see them. "Wow… You are all… here!"

Miriallia wanted to throw her arms around the woman who had put her feelings into perspective, but the moment had to be spoiled when Cagalli suddenly blurted out, "Perfect! Murrue, we were just getting ready for this fun game. Join us!"

"Eh?" Murrue looked at the princess, confused.

Everyone groaned in agony.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

**_Yuugiri: Ohhh dear, it has been a while! But as some of you may have already known, Yuugiri has been trying desperately to adjust to her new working environment for the past month, as well as her new means of writing updates. It is entirely annoying, really. One would not have thought having the apostrophe in the upper case of the number 7 key would make things twice as hard to type…_**

**_But anyways, here is the update. Nothing much happened, except for me trying to desperately tie knots in the plot because I have been rewriting my outline for the TIH story. Originally I was planning to write up to 50 chapters, but as I am presently shifting gears in my life, I cannot promise as much time and dedication in writing Fanfics, but I do not want to disappoint my wonderful readers, and so I am now aiming for maybe 40-45 chapters instead so as to finish the story early and not simply end up abandoning the story altogether._**

**_Please bear with me. This is a very critical time in my life right now._**

**_LOL but in the meantime, Yuugiri has a little treat for you all. Because she has been entirely busy for the past weeks of her move to Japan, someone else has been kind enough to answer the reviews for me. Yes! It is none other than YZAK JULE who answered your reviews! If you are curious to see what he had to say about your comments, please just go to my profile and click on the link to my Live journal account. _**

**_Disclaimer: Yzak Jules views do not resemble Yuugiri's AT ALL…!_**


	37. Phase 37: Fair Warnings

_**Yes, Yuugiri is alive. Aside from the fact that she, a creature of tropical descent, is freezing her ass off here in Hokkaido, she is fine, yet fairly guilty for having kept you all waiting for the update, which by my standards, is pretty so-so. Forgive me. My feet are too cold for me to think. **_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam SEED**_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

He wanted to kill something. He wanted to take the stupid ketchup bottle from the middle of the room and kill something with it.

Yzak once again found himself trapped as Kari gently stroked his arm which was possibly the only thing keeping him sane at the moment. They were back in the circle. Cagalli had nothing to do with it. This time, it was Murrue who did the persuading, which he let her do quietly, since the former Captain said she brought important news from Orb and the Treaty. This had momentarily distracted the princess from the ketchup bottle of frigging truth

"First of all, I'm glad you are doing great," Murrue said as she started opening her tote bag and slipping out a fat white envelope from it. "I'm sorry for interrupting your little group study. I wasn't aware you had your exams at a quarterly basis."

"Neither did we," Miriallia said as she shifted in her place next to Dearka, who was sitting quite erect and at full attention as if waiting for an order from a superior. He had been like that from the moment the former captain arrived. It was as if he was dreading whatever she had to say. Anything that could possibly concern the PLANTs made him edgy, ever since he had been getting daily "hints" from his father that he needed him back.

Yzak tuned out their small talk as he felt Kari slightly move as if to stand. His hand instantly tightened around her wrist. "Where are you going?" he asked roughly, thinking she was going to leave him to deal with hearing whatever Murrue had to say alone.

Kari blinked at him and tilted her head curiously to the right. "I didn't think I would have anything to do with this."

Yzak blinked back at her. "Stay."

Kari smiled warily at him, didn't say anything, but didn't leave as well. It was one of those times when she simply complied to anything he said even without him having to explain why. Especially when he did not feel like explaining most of the time. He watched her pick at his arm hairs once more, then looked up to listen to what Murrue had to say after talking a bit with her former crew.

"I won't stall on the news I have for you, since I know you have all been anticipating what has been going on for the last few months you have been here in Hokkaido."

Yzak felt his heart lurch in his chest. No one – except possibly Kari because for some weird reason she always knew about everything- knew how much he hungered for news from the outside. Aside from the constant worrying his girlfriend was giving him, half of the time, he was worrying about his mother. To others it may seem pretty childish, but unashamed, he loved his mother to death.

Kari instantly looked up at him the moment he stiffened. But as usual, she didn't say anything. She merely stared at him for a few seconds before returning her gaze to Murrue, who was now spreading some important looking papers in the middle of the circle. Everyone's eyes followed the former Captain's hands.

"The reconstruction of Orb has been officially declared complete." She eyed Cagalli with a smile. "As you've ordered, civilians were top priority and now whatever's left of the funds have been divided into two, one for more relocation, and the other half to rebuild the mass driver in Kaguya."

Cagalli frowned as she picked up a piece of paper Yzak's enhanced eyesight caught as the itemized expenses of the proposed rebuilding of the mass driver. "Will it be enough?"

Murrue nodded. "Help from Taiwan and Central America and the PLANTs have arrived just yesterday."

Athrun leaned forward from his place. "In forms of?"

Murrue shrugged. "Man power, finances… any form of help they could provide."

Yzak swallowed hard when Dearka suddenly spoke. "So the PLANTs really have sent help?" the blond Coordinator asked.

The former captain's eyes turned to meet the Buster Pilot's and let it linger there a few seconds too long. She nodded. "Of course. In fact, you might even find it surprising to discover that the one who is spear-heading provisions is none other than your father, Tad Elthman."

Dearka did not even look the least bit surprised at this news. "I know." He looked away. "I've heard."

And for a moment, there was an uncomfortable silence as the group watched Miriallia look over to her boyfriend with searching eyes.

Murrue was the one who broke the silence. "You do know he is coming over to Orb in three days, don't you?"

Yzak's eyes darted from Miriallia to Dearka and felt a sudden tension flash between the normally placid couple. Kari squeezed his arm as if to say she too noticed the change. Miriallia's blue eyes widened a bit before finally falling down to her lap. Dearka bit his lip uncertainly but did not say anything.

Athrun seemed to have noticed the uncomfortable silence and spoke up. "Does this mean you brought news from the PLANTs as well?"

Murrue brightened at the change of subject and immediately nodded with a smile. "Oh, yes, yes! You would be quite happy that since the funds of the PLANTs have been allotted for renovations instead of making weapons for war, I am honored to be the one to tell you that they are working on reopening trade with no exemptions and not simply with sponsor nations, which the sponsor nations actually didn't even bother to say so much as boo about."

Yzak gritted his teeth unconsciously at the mention of the sponsor nations. The mere thought of them brought back memories he would rather have forgotten. When he saw the looks on Athrun, Lacus and Dearka's faces, he knew that he was not the only one. Kira and the others couldn't possibly understand what they were feeling. Only they who had lived in the PLANTs could know.

By the time the PLANTs were well established funded by the Atlantic Federation, Eurasian Federation and the Republic of East Asia, the colonies were intended to serve as large-scale production sites aside from food, which were agreed to be imported from Earth. By then, things have been going crazy with anti-Coordinator groups which ended up threatening the safety of the PLANTs. Having no political autonomy, of course, the Coordinators living in the colonies did not have anything to defend themselves. It was then did Athrun and Lacus' father tried to establish the Zodiac Alliance, which demanded the production of food and trade independence from the sponsor nations as well as self-defense rights. Much to their dismay, the sponsor nations did not approve.

One thing led to another and because of justified rebellion from both Clyne and Zala, the colonies from Junius Seven to Ten were remodeled for Agricultural Production. Then all hell broke out and because of suppression of rights, several aggressive actions from the Alliance were made, retaliated by the PLANTs which happen to have come prepared. By February eleven, C.E 70, the Earth Alliance declared war against the PLANTs.

And by February Fourteenth, Junius Seven was hit by a nuclear Missile killing two hundred forty three thousand seven hundred and twenty one lives, along with them, Lenore Zala, Athrun's mother.

"I see," was all Athrun said. Perhaps for him, it mattered little at all. He lowered his head to hide his eyes with his hair. He did not look too happy. For him it might as well have been too late.

Murrue looked over to him. "It might not be the best news, Athrun Zala. But it's the best news we've had in months."

Athrun looked back at her, his green eyes conveying no expression. "I know."

Yzak watched as Cagalli gently squeezed the Justice pilot's arm as if to try to comfort him. She was awarded a smile that did not reach his eyes.

This time it was Lacus' turn to ask her questions. "How are the people up in the colony?"

"Strange you have to ask that." Murrue pulled out a magazine from inside her fat white folder and placed it in the middle of the circle. Yzak craned his neck to see what it was. He felt his face crack a bit when his lips curved into a small grin.

There on the cover page of a magazine Yzak had never seen before in his life, was the gentle face of Lacus Clyne in her last concert up in the PLANTs. The banner read in white block letters: **_The Voice of Hope…_**

Yzak could remember the first time Patrick Zala declared Lacus as a traitor. He himself could not believe it then. The PLANTs had been divided into two when Lacus Clyne started questioning the intentions of the Council. Expecially when she finally joined in the battle alongside the renegade legged ship from the E.A as well as Orb's Kusanagi. Everyone had been thrown off the loop then.

Even Yzak himself. It was only then did he start to ask himself what the heck he was fighting for.

Lacus fingered the corners of the magazine and smiled her small smile. "Oh, dear me…"

Yzak felt Kari lean her head on his shoulder and he peered down at her questioningly, momentarily diverting his attention from the conversation. "What's wrong?"

She shook her head slightly. "Nothing. Why?"

Yzak scowled. He hated it when she lied to him. "Your head is aching again, isn't it?"

"Not at all. You worry too much, Yzak." She touched his cheek with cool fingers and said, "They are talking about your mother now."

Yzak blinked and looked up when he realized she was right.

"Ezaria Jule is running things quite well up there, but is lacking manpower," Murrue was saying, her eyes directed at an unsuspecting Yzak. "You've talked, haven't you? About this?"

Yzak nodded. "The Zala supporters haven't been that nice though, as far as I've heard." He unconsciously brushed back Kari's hair and tucked it behind her ear. "Has she said anything about my return?"

Kari's grip tightened around his arm and Yzak felt something he hadn't felt for quite some time now. He felt dread… dread of the fact that he was going to leave for the PLANTs soon.

Murrue titled her head to the right uncertainly. "I haven't been informed about such happenings. I think the Council is trying to keep it within the colony walls so as not to get other people involved in it. I'm sure you will be the very first one to know about it when things settle down."

It was not enough for him. He rested his cheek on top of Kari's head. He did not feel like he wanted to leave yet.

Kira scratched his head. "You came all the way here to inform us of things you could easily tell us via phone." He gestured at the former Captain. "Is there anything you might need from us?"

At this, Yzak could have sworn Murrue's face flushed a bit. She laughed. "You got me. I wanted to see how you were and in a way, I've missed you all." She shrugged. "I wanted to take you out for some dinner or something, but it seemed I caught you at a bad time."

Yzak felt the hairs stand at the back of his neck when he saw in the corner of his eye the reaction on Cagalli's face after seeing that the serious conversation was finally out of the way.

Cagalli laughed. "We were just taking a break from studying – "

"A break we did not particularly need," Dearka hissed.

"Shut up." Cagalli turned to Murrue again. "This is the first time we got together for some time now so I wanted to play a game." In one swift move, she had the freaking ketchup bottle in the middle of the circle. Murrue winced a bit.

In an instant, the feeling of wanting to kill something returned. Kari laughed silently as if she understood. She did not say anything as she snuggled closer to him.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

She did not look at him when he tried to plead with his eyes when he found the bottle's snout pointing directly at him. It was actually that time when he felt that she was not there even when he was holding her hand. She tried to hide her blue eyes under her orange hair.

But right now, though he seldom let anything like this pass, Cagalli badgered him before he could even confront Miriallia about what she was feeling.

"Who wants to ask a question?" the Princess asked seriously. It was ironic. For someone who wanted to play a supposedly naughty game of prying the truth out of other people, she did not look like she was playing. Perhaps it was because of the news she heard from Murrue. It mattered little to him. He was the first victim…

He nearly fainted when he saw Yzak's lips curl up into a tight sneer.

He knew he was dead even before he heard his friend speak. "I'll ask a question."

Dearka swallowed hard. For a moment he thought Yzak was going to ask him about what he knew about Kari. Something he did not want to talk about. Not with Yzak. Not with Kari. Not now. There were too many things he still had to find out. Speculations about Kari and Fallon's identity were not going to help Yzak with anything.

He was surprised when he finally asked the question, though.

"What did you do that made Fallon stop clinging onto you?"

He felt everyone's eyes turn to him as if they too wondered how he managed to do that.

"Ah, yes that young half-Coordinator. I remember her practically your extra appendage then back in Orb. How is she?" Murrue asked.

Dearka swallowed hard again. He had always wondered about the person in Fallon's memories. So much, in fact, that he had completely forgotten that Fallon saw _his_ memories as well. He saw Athrun dart his eyes from him then to the floor. Dearka sighed. "I used the MemS with Fallon two weeks ago. She saw… through my eyes and she saw I was one of the pilots of the mobile suits that invaded Heliopolis."

The moment he had it out of his mouth, he suddenly felt like taking it back. Different reactions were gathered from the group.

"You used the MemS?" Yzak asked incredulously.

Miriallia gasped. "Dearka!"

Kira lowered his head. "So that's why she knew about me and Heliopolis…"

Kari leaned forward eagerly. "What did you see?"

Dearka felt panic rise up his throat as he saw Kari examine him with those wide green eyes. He had never really been that close with Yzak's girl. He found it hard to talk to her with her eyes trying to pierce through your soul and having her say the things in your head before you even realize you were thinking it.

Cagalli came to his rescue. "One question at a time, people." She grabbed the bottle and spun it without a care.

Everyone didn't even have a chance to react until it finally pointed to Yzak.

Everyone fell silent. Until Murrue let out a snigger, which took Dearka a while to realize it actually came from her.

Yzak snarled. "What's so funny?"

Murrue shook her head, her brown hair swaying over her shoulders as she gave the Duel pilot an amused look. "Nothing. It's just that I never really expected to see you sitting in this circle, playing with everyone else."

This did not please Yzak. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing."

Dearka watched as Yzak's face turned red until he finally turned away from the former Captain. "Just ask me the damn question so I can get this over with."

Silence.

"_Someone ask me a damn question!_"

Dearka had to stop himself from bursting into laugher. He found it strange to have Yzak actually demand to be asked.

Kira did the asking.

"I never really got to ask you then…" the Freedom pilot started.

"What?" Yzak snapped.

Kira winced. "I've always wondered whatever happened with your first date with Kari then… since you got home late and you looked like you were having a heart attack that day."

Dearka felt his ears prickle up at the mention of the fateful day when Yzak finally had the courage to ask his girl out. He hadn't been here in Abashiri then. It was when they had accompanied Cagalli back to Orb. Hadn't he cursed the circumstances then when he was not able to tease his friend about it?

_And now I get to find out!_

"What are you smiling at, Elthman?" Yzak snapped.

Dearka did not realize he was smiling at all. He sneered. "You tell me."

Cagalli shrugged as if uninterested, which was rare, given she always did love it when everyone else squirmed. "Answer the question Yzak. Stop prolonging the inevitable."

Sweat beaded Yzak's forehead which the light-haired Coordinator dashed away with the back of his hand. Kari watched him with slightly bemused eyes.

"Our first date, Yzak," she said silently, and Dearka could have sworn a faint blush rose to her cheeks.

Yzak looked like he was going to explode. "Our date… " he swallowed hard and lowered his eyes to the ground. He looked like he was finally going to give in, until he suddenly regained the normal Yzak reaction and snarled at everyone. "It's none of your freaking business!"

Dearka was loving it. "Just answer the question. What happened in your first date?"

"Better than what happened in yours, that's for sure."

Dearka couldn't help but let out a laugh at that. "Then tell us what happened."

Yzak nearly shrunk when everyone leaned over towards him.

The Duel Pilot looked like he was going to explode, until he finally took a deep breath and let it out in a huff. "We went out for a walk around town and then ate dinner."

Silence

Dearka coughed. "That's it?"

Kari blushed.

Yzak looked away. "Yes. Now lay off."

"Where'd you eat?" Athrun suddenly asked.

"One freaking question at a time, Zala!" Yzak hissed.

"Fine," the Justice pilot grabbed the bottle, paused a bit as if calculating something, spun and smiled satisfactorily when the bottle pointed straight at Kari. "What happened in the date, Kari?"

Kari smiled vaguely. "It was the best night ever when we walked around town. Nothing could have hampered my night even when we accidentally walked into a gay bar – "

"_What?_" Kira and Lacus blurted out in unison. Dearka nearly collapsed. Miriallia, for the first time since his turn, let out a strangled gasp. Murrue let out a small, "Oh, dear…"

Yzak looked like he wanted to die.

"Yes, my sandal's strap snapped and Yzak had to carry me somewhere where we could sit. He made a mistake – "

Dearka burst out laughing all over again.

"Shut up, Dearka!" Yzak snarled.

"Yeah, let her continue," Cagalli said soberly. Dearka cast a look over to the princess after trying to control his laughter. She did not look the least bit amused by the happenings of today. He wondered why.

Kari was being a sport, however. "It was fairly entertaining. Yzak got hit on by a guy who – "

"_KARI!_"

This time, Dearka really couldn't help it. A small scratchy noise escaped from his throat the moment he saw the looks on Kira and Athrun's face. Miriallia and Lacus both clamped a hand over their mouths. Cagalli's eyes nearly bulged. Murrue's eyebrows climbed her forehead quickly.

Yzak practically melted in his place. His face was so red, Dearka could have sworn he had stopped breathing. "You could have just lied!"

Kari shook her head. "What is the fun of lying in a Spin the Bottle game?"

Dearka howled with laughter. Kira and Athrun sniggered a bit. He will never – NEVER – forget this day. Ever. And he was going to make sure Yzak never forgot either.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Aside from the fact that yes, Athrun wasted a good turn to pry things off of Kari about anything that could possibly mean something, Cagalli was getting extremely bored. Dearka and Yzak were having the time of their lives ratting out embarrassing experiences every time the bottle pointed towards each other or their girlfriends. Miriallia did not look like she was willing to tolerate it, and it seemed like Murrue noticed too.

"Milly," Murrue called at the orange haired girl while Yzak and Dearka were busy daring each other to tell everyone about their meeting with the parents. To think the bottle was pointing at Kira…

Miriallia looked up from staring at her hands. "Yes?"

"Would you mind leaving the game for a while and accompanying me to get something down town?"

Cagalli blinked and nodded when Milly looked over to her for permission to leave her game. The two left after excusing themselves. Dearka, for a moment, looked up questioningly when Milly left without even saying goodbye, moved as if to follow, until Cagalli stopped him.

"Play the damn game, Elthman," Cagalli snapped, getting pretty tired of the outcome of her little spin the bottle game.

Kira laughed and leaned back on his hands on the floor. "No one wants to ask me anything? That's a relief."

Cagalli sighed as she imitated her brother and watched the things unfold before her, with Athrun finally joining in when Yzak and Dearka started rubbing in embarrassing things that happened when they were still studying in the PLANTs. They were noisy. But she decided to let them be. She somehow knew that she won't be able to do anything much about Kari anyway.

Leaning back, the words Murrue brought back from Orb echoed through her thoughts. Things appear to be going well in her country without her. She started wondering if things would still stay the same once she starts running things. She was always so afraid of messing up.

She snapped out of her reverie when she felt someone nudging her from her right. It was Lacus.

"So much for studying," the songstress said as she gestured at the boys, with whom Kira had willingly joined in. "Tell me, what were you planning with this game?"

Cagalli opened her mouth to speak but was surprised when Kari suddenly spoke.

"Kian is home, Cagalli. He was scheduled to come back today. You must have seen him along the way?" Kari said as she looked away from the boys who were now discussing mobile suit maneuvers.

Cagalli stared at the girl with no signs of surprise. In truth, she wanted to learn a bit more from her. Not only because Yzak seemed to be quite drawn to her, but because she would have been quite nice to understand as well. She looked like she and Cagalli would be good friends, if only the princess did not always look at the mysterious girl like she was some puzzle to be solved.

Kari brushed back her hair off her forehead. It made Cagalli wish she still had her long, long hair. "All you need to do is ask," Kari said.

Lacus looked from Cagalli to Kari. "Ask what?"

"A lot of things. Do you have anything to ask me, Lacus?"

Lacus blinked a bit. "Not really." She fell silent for a bit before suddenly brightening. "Oh! How is your head?"

This made Kari pose a bit before laughing lightly. "It is fine. Thank you for asking."

Cagalli watched the girl with interest as Lacus started to ask about the fateful first date. It was not everyday she could actually find a girl who could control such a temper as Yzak's, or maybe it is because of her uncanny ability to predict what he could be thinking. She really was something else. It was then did she decide that she liked her.

She leaned forward and turned her head to the side. But somehow deep down, even though she knew she liked her, there was still something that did not sit well for some weird reason.

"The Aegis was a dumb mobile suit anyway," Cagalli heard Yzak say as she looked over to the four boys.

"What are you saying? It was a command unit that could make you run for you money with its X300-series frame!" Athrun protested.

"Which was the reason why it looked so strange. The claw-form was totally weird," Dearka retorted. "Now the Buster…! A beauty. The hyper impulse long range rifle – "

Yzak snorted. "The Duel was the best mobile suit there was. It's purpose was more generalized than the Buster to begin with."

Kira let out a snigger. "Does it matter? All three of them were stolen from the E.A."

Athrun pointed a finger at his best friend. "You could talk. You stole the Freedom."

Kira scoffed. "I did not steal it. It was given to me by Lacus. Didn't you, Lacus?" he asked as he turned to his girlfriend for backup.

Lacus blinked, momentarily distracted from her conversation with Kari. "Huh?"

"You gave me the Freedom!"

Cagalli warily stared at his brother and his friends who were now looking at Lacus as if to dare her to prove him otherwise. It was weird. While normal teenage boys would be fighting about which car was cooler, here they were, comparing mobile suits.

Lacus let out a nervous laugh. "Well, in a way I did give you access to it, but after that I was declared a traitor then so… " she laughed again. "Technically you did steal it… "

"Hah!" Athrun cried out victoriously. "I knew it!"

Kira was not done. "You did the same with the Justice, didn't you?"

Athrun flushed slightly. "It was handed down to my care!"

Cagalli, Lacus and Kari stared at the four boys as they ended up in another fit of _I-man-I-great_ arguments she was not in the mood to tolerate. Scooting over to retrieve the bottle, she placed it in between her and Kari and sighed. "Let's just study…"

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

She had never really been mad at Dearka before. She did not want to get mad at him because he knew that they had too much between them for them to fight about certain tiny details that concerned his family.

_His father is coming in three days. He knew… and he never told me…_

Murrue placed a hand on her shoulder as they walked down the sidewalk to downtown Abashiri. "I've never gotten the chance to talk to you ever since that phone call. I wanted to ask how you were."

Miriallia bit her lip uncertainly as she looked up at the older woman beside her. She could remember that talk. She swore she would never forget that day when her feelings were finally put into perspective by the woman who had experienced the same thing as she. "I'm – "

"Don't tell me you're all right because I know something is bothering you. You did not look like you were yourself when they were playing that annoying yet strangely amusing game. Especially when I mentioned Dearka's father and when he said he was coming down to Earth."

Miriallia swallowed. She did not want it to bother her too much. It was Dearka's life after all. His family and his decision if he wanted to introduce her to his father. Perhaps it was because she was too family-oriented. Or perhaps she thought that it would only be fair. She had, after all, introduced him to her mom and dad. "You might think it would be crazy. I want to meet his father."

Murrue nodded as if she understood. "But you do know that you can't suddenly force yourself into his life like that."

Miriallia shook her head vigorously. "I'm not forcing myself in his life. I just…" she breathed deep. "I just want to be a part if it."

"Aren't you already a part of his life?"

"I don't know…" She clenched her hands into fists. "I have always asked him about his family. He seldom talked about it."

"Could it be that there is a reason why?"

"Lacus said that things are… different up in the PLANTs." Miriallia ran a hand through her hair a bit and tugged at it roughly. She wanted to scold herself for being too immature. "I just want to meet him. That's all."

"Did you actually tell him?"

Miriallia opened her mouth as if to speak, closed it, then frowned. She did not even bother to ask him, because she felt like he did not want to talk about it much.

"You didn't, did you?"

She shook her head. "No."

Murrue laughed out loud. Something she did not know how to react to. "I think I get it."

Miriallia blinked and looked up at her, interested. Could it be that Murrue knew what was going on with her? "You do?"

"Yes." She gripped her shoulder slightly. "You are young."

Miriallia felt her feet stop moving, and her former Captain had to stop as well, casting an understanding gaze. "That's it?"

"Yes. Now –" Murrue jerked her head forward. " – do not think too much about his parents. You are not going to get married yet. You don't need to meet his parents yet. If you really want to meet him, tell Dearka first before jumping into conclusions."

Miriallia's mouth nearly hung open as she stared at Murrue, embarrassed. Of course she was not thinking of getting married! All she wanted was to meet his father! She blushed. Admittedly, it had been in her mind. She was half-afraid he didn't want to introduce her to his dad because he was afraid he would hate her.

And admittedly, she did not want her boyfriend's dad to hate her.

Murrue was once again beside her and gripping her arm. "Now let's go and get decent hand cream."

Miriallia blinked several times as she was led down the street towards the City Supermarket. "What?"

Murrue shushed her. "Aside from the fact that Kaguya doesn't actually have cosmetic shops, Erika Simmons wants me to get her hand cream." The former Captain did not look too happy. "She wants me to get her hand cream., ugh I couldn't believe it myself, but since I used her shampoo several times last week, I couldn't say no."

She could hardly believe it. Murrue was talking about shampoo and hand cream. They entered the supermarket with Miriallia still in a whirl as she was led into the aisle of tubes and tubes of cosmetics. She watched Murrue murmur to herself as she started down the aisle with a vengeance, leaving Milly watching her beside some nail polish. Sighing in resignation, she turned around to try testing on some nail polish when at the corner of her eye she saw someone looking over to her.

There, with his elbow on a stack of bags of flour, was none other than Yalin. He had his trusty apron on, and his handsome face was smeared with a bit of flour on one cheek. He instantly flashed her his trademark smiles when he saw her look back at him.

She waved when he moved to approach her. "Hi there. I didn't know you were working today."

Yalin shrugged and gestured at the nail polish. "Getting your nails done or something?"

Milly blinked. "Me? Oh, no." She looked over her shoulder. "I'm with – uhm… Murrue?" She found the aisle all empty. No signs of the former Captain.

Yalin followed her eyes. "Are you with someone?"

"Well… " Miriallia scratched her head. "I _was_… But…" She shook her head. "Never mind." She turned back to her friend. "How are you?"

"Me? I'm fine. Shouldn't you be studying, though?"

"Shouldn't _you_ be studying?"

"I will. After work." He glanced down the aisle again as if to look for the person Miriallia said she was with. "Listen. I wanted to tell you something."

Miriallia looked over to him, peering into his grey eyes questioningly. "Anything important?"

"Not really. Uhm, it's just that… " He looked around slightly again as if worried that someone was going to pop out of nowhere to get him. He leaned forward and said in a hushed whisper. "_Kian is back._"

Miriallia did not know what to think. She could vaguely remember the madman who had once taken them hostage. She could hardly even believe it had happened. It sounded too cliché then. But the mere thought of those cold, cold green eyes and fiery locks made the hair at the back of her neck stand on end. "Should I be worried?"

Yalin shook his head. "Not you. But I suggest Yzak should… "

Miriallia frowned. "Why?"

Yalin shook his head again. "Just to be on the safe side, all right?" He wiped at the flour at his cheek after seeing it on the mirror on the other side of the aisle. "I have to go back to work or I'll get my ass kicked by my senior." He turned to Miriallia again and flashed a small smile. "I'll see you at school?"

She titled her head, surprised that he did not stay long, when he usually did. She opened her mouth to say something when Yalin suddenly grabbed a bottle of cream nail polish from the rack and handed it to her.

"Those would look good on your nails," was what he said before he finally turned on his heel and disappeared on the other side of the stack of toilet paper.

Miriallia took a step forward as if to run after him when she felt a presence standing behind her.

"Oh, my. What a handsome young man." It was Murrue. She had her eyes twinkling slightly, her arms crossed over her chest, a tube of cheap-looking hand cream in one hand. "He seemed… nice." More twinkling of the eyes.

Miriallia flushed as she nearly stammered something out in defense to Murrue's malicious tone. She looked down at her hand where the bottle of nail polish was when she found out she was being defensive.

"Yes… He is very… nice…"

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

**_I've finished my three-week training for my work last November 28th and I couldn't believe how much I've missed writing. I'm pleased, however, when I saw I can reply to my readers directly from my review corner! Oh Joy! _**

**_Anyway, my wonderful readers, thank you for patiently waiting for the update. I'm still a bit rusty, admittedly. I need to polish up a bit and reread my new outline. But I am very happy right now. On the 10th, I get to go back home to the Philippines for Christmas! I can't wait! Nothing could have been a better Christmas present than to be able to spend two months with my brother before I start real work. _**

**_However I am not promising much on update, for in reality I don't know how often I can update my stories. The only promise I have is that I WILL FINISH IT. Please bare with Yuugiri. She is a poor slob who needs to work in order to live. XD_**


	38. Phase 38: Connections?

_**An update? Oh! My! God!**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed**_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Sometimes he was wondering why he ever bothered coming back. In Higashimokoto, he had never felt so at peace with himself. With everyone and everything. Right now, Abashiri seemed so… crowded.

"You're early," Mrs. Takano muttered dryly the moment he entered her office. She was sitting on her swivel chair with her back to him, flipping on a conspicuous-looking notebook.

The house had changed a lot for the past weeks he had been away. For one, it was darker than usual. The curtains in the office were drawn. The desk was even more cluttered than the last time he was here.

Kian shrugged. "There's a first time for everything."

Mrs. Takano stopped flipping through the notebook and slowly turned around on her swivel chair. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you're being smart with me, Markian Takano."

Kian felt his left cheek twitch involuntarily. He hated being called by his whole name. Markian… It reminded him for his father, whose name was the same as his. He hated remembering him, simply because he got unexplainably angry when he did. But this time, he fought with the fury. "You don't look too happy to see me."

Mrs. Takano sighed in frustration, massaging her temple with her forefingers. Kian merely stared. He did not have a shred of sympathy for her. Not with what she had to talk about. He knew what she was thinking already.

"I tried to keep this family together for so very long, Kian. For so very long. I did everything I could to make it stay as it always had been sixteen years ago. But things are… "

"Not going as you planned?" he offered.

She eyed him menacingly. He did not tear his eyes from her gaze. "Her memories from the moment she was sixteen were uploaded into her mind," she said angrily. "At this point in time where cloning is possible, you would have thought they had made this sort of technology fool-proof!"

Kian cocked his head back and narrowed his eyes into slits. "It _did _work. You spent ridiculously large amounts of money to make sure she grew up to be what she was supposed to be. You made everything to be how she was before. Her hair, her skin, everything. Except for one. You made her eyes green instead of blue, because you said it reminded you of Dad." He sniffed. "You let this get on. You got her head implanted with years of memories she never even got to experience. You can't stop it. She may be a replica of her, and you protected her up to this point, but she's not a mere computer, Mom. She's… she's a living being."

Mrs. Takano was not pleased. Kian was not expecting her to be. She angrily brandished her hand in front of her face as if to get rid of what Kian just said. "I told you never to talk about what she is."

"You started it," Kian said. "Face it. She's acquiring traits Kari never had. She spends countless hours mastering her individuality, and she's becoming a whole new person. And you can't bear that."

"You talk as if this is my problem alone."

"You're making it _your _problem!"

Mrs. Takano's mouth opened then closed furiously in an attempt to look for something to say. After a few moments of fumbling, she spat out, "You promised to take care of her this time around."

Kian gritted his teeth. He did not feel like he deserved this scolding. "I am."

"No, you're not! She is now spending a considerable amount of time with a Coordinator! Have you forgotten who it is that took your sister away from us?"

Kian hissed under his breath some incoherent curse. "I haven't forgotten it, that she ran off with a Coordinator. But it's not as if we can still do anything about that! She's gone… That's it. I don't even see the reason why you're being such a pain with it when you and I both know that it's your fault why she left in the first place!"

Mrs. Takano gasped. "Watch that mouth, young man!"

"Oh, be a lady and just accept that fact! She left because of you and she has never made any decision that has made her any happier! But you, you couldn't simply be happy for her, and disowned her for feeling what she felt. What else did you want her to do but run off? And now that you're seeing she's finally getting to have a life of her own, you get mad all over again."

"Shut up!"

"Face that fact, Mom! You can't stand her perfection because she will one day leave you because you hold her so close to you it's suffocating! Congratulations, Mom. Your clone is a failure," Kian said and instantly regretted saying it when he felt a stinging sensation on his right cheek. His mother had slapped him.

"Never say that again," she hissed between gritted teeth. She had always been in denial about it, and sometimes Kian had always felt like she feared what she did in the first place.

Kian watched as his mother trembled slightly as she hugged herself. She stood there right in front of him in the middle of her dark office. And as he did, deep down inside he felt frightened. She just sounded so… desperate.

"I just cannot let this happen… Not again. Not now." These were her last words before absentmindedly returning to her desk and flipped once more through that notebook on her desk.

Kian's face remained as neutral as it could while he let the tingling sensation vanish from his face. Watching his mother's back, he worried about her sanity. She almost – _almost _– sounded as crazy as he.

Stuffing his hands in his pockets, he turned to leave. He needed to see someone.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

It was a wonder how they could actually dread something and find out it was not that horrible after all. Regardless of the teachers' warnings about their examinations, Cagalli did not seem to have had a hard time answering.

But damn, did it ever feel so good to be out of that stuffy classroom! The sun was shining and the breeze blowing in from the lake was cool and every single student filing out of the block buildings looked completely thrilled, what with the examinations finally over.

Cagalli stretched her arms over her head after dropping her book bag on the patch of grass they sat on not too long ago for cutting electives. She had never felt this alive in weeks. She had finished first in answering their tests and had decided to leave when her professor had cornered her before she left her classroom, congratulating her for a job well done for her Political Science report about the Sponsor Nations. And hadn't she just beamed at that compliment? She still could not stop smiling and hoping that running a country was going to be as easy as writing a paper.

Lacus appeared behind her and immediately looked out into the soccer field, a content smile on her face. "I have this strange feeling in the pit of my stomach. It's like an urge to scream really, really loud."

Cagalli looked over to her, then proceeded to touch her toes. "Feels good, doesn't it? How did your art class go?"

"Nothing could have been better. The teacher let me out early because Mr. Pink was being a pain." And with this, a shiny pink ball popped out of her tote bag with a loud, mechanical "_haroooooooooooooooooo!_" following it.

Cagalli straightened immediately, shocked. How long has it been since she last saw that little toy? "Hey, where have you been all this time?"

The little Haro hovered slightly around her head while flapping its ears. "_Haro? Haroooo?"_

Lacus tried to catch Mr. Pink but the naughty thing flew off out of reach and disappeared behind a bush. The songstress sighed. "He was in my dresser the whole time for the past months since our visit to Orb." She blushed. "Ever since Kira chucked him out of the car in the mountains, Mr. Pink won't stop bugging him so I had to keep them apart."

Cagalli snickered. Of course, she knew what Lacus was talking about. She wouldn't have dared miss it then, because it was too good to have been kept from her. Her brother didn't know, of course.

Slightly fiddling with her skirt, which she had gone quite accustomed to, much to her surprise, she sat down on the grass and breather deep of the freshest air she had ever beheld. It was strange how it felt to be this… this _free_. And to actually appreciate the simplicity of this freedom from school work and exams, instead of worrying about things not too long ago did she break away from.

Lacus sat down beside her, sighed and then stretched to her full slender length on the grass, using her tote bag as a pillow. "You know, it's only now did I realize the PLANTs did not do a good job at simulating the sky there."

Cagalli blinked as she looked down at the pink-haired songstress. "Hm?"

Lacus' right hand pointed lazily at the sky. "Absolutely no one can make it look as pretty as the real thing. Look at it, it's so blue!"

With this said, Cagalli raised her face to the sky and laughed at how innocent her friend had sounded when she pertained to something Cagalli herself had never paid much attention to. "To tell you honestly, it never really crossed my mind." She leaned back on her elbows and for a moment fell silent as she watched fluffy wisps of white clouds hover overhead in an endless sky. "But golly, it really is pretty…"

It was not as if she was getting soft about such things, or being sentimental for some reason. But right then, as she sat with her face to the sky, she asked herself if she would ever be able to do this when she takes over her father's position in Orb.

She did not know where that came from, that thought, but was immediately distracted when something shot out of the bushes to their right.

Her eyes widened immediately when the vision in the form of blonde hair and green eyes beheld her.

"Fallon!" Lacus screeched as she bolted into a sitting position.

There, breathing quite furiously was none other than the half-Coordinator, Fallon Bryaritt. Her hair, normally in cute little curls over her forehead, was in disarray, giving her that wild look that was almost always seen in her eyes. Her clothes had dead leaves and twigs poking out of it, as if she had been lurking in that bush for a while now. But it was then did Cagalli see the reason for Lacus' un-Lacus-like reaction.

Fallon had her right hand raised over her head, and in her fist was none other than Mr. Pink, clutched in her strong fingers as the little toy screamed bloody murder, over and over again, "_Help me! Help meeeeeee!_"

"You stupid, stupid thing!" Fallon screamed back at it as she threatened to chuck it to the ground. Cagalli was about to run to the kid when she realized she was beaten to it. Just when Fallon was about to ram the Haro to the grass, Lacus was in another second standing right beside the half-Coordinator, her hand catching her wrist and holding on to it with a vice-grip. Fallon instantly gasped and dropped Mr. Pink, who hovered immediately inches before hitting the grass.

Lacus, who seldom did move with such speed, did not let go of the girl. Her grip on her seemed contrary to her facial features; calm and smiling. "Please don't do that to my Haro."

Cagalli brushed her skirt clean and slowly got up, relaxing when she finally saw her friend letting go of Fallon's wrist, which Fallon immediately rubbed gently and held it close to her chest, head lowered and eyes darting everywhere. It was not everyday you get to have Fallon obey you with only one request. But maybe that was because of who asked her. When serious, Lacus always did project that aura of wanting to be followed.

Lacus smiled cheerily, folded her arms over her stomach and nodded in approval. "Thank you. Mr. Pink dislikes violence." And as if to emphasize on this, the pink Haro started hovering around Lacus' head, then quickly slipped back into the songstress tote lying on the grass. The bag shivered a bit then finally settled down after a while.

Cagalli looked at the bag, bewildered. She looked back to Fallon, and gasped when she finally saw the possible reason why she was so mad. The hand she was using to grip the wrist Lacus had seized earlier had a large, ugly bruise forming at her wrist.

Lacus seemed to have seen it the same time Cagalli did. "Oh, dear. Did Mr. Pink do that to you?"

Cagalli frowned as Fallon shifted her hands and tried to hide her bruise from them while averting her eyes. With that, she turned as if to leave. Cagalli stepped in front of her, blocking her path. Fallon's sharp green eyes widened as she looked up at Cagalli's face, then cast them down at the ground once more. "Let me pass."

Cagalli crossed her arms over her chest. "The clinic is open. Would you want us to take you?"

Fallon's lips peeled back from her teeth in a snarl as she recoiled from them instantaneously, as if the thought of going to the clinic was the most horrible thing there ever was. "Just leave me alone!"

Lacus moved to touch her. Fallon nearly snapped it off. Cagalli did not like this, and seized the half-Coordinator by her good forearm. "It looks like it would need some medical attention." She was not lying. The bruise was turning into an ugly shade of purple.

Fallon shook her head and Cagalli hastily dodged an upcoming kick, then caught the protesting girl by the scruff of her neck. She was not about to tolerate this. Right now, she was thinking of how lucky Fallon's parents were not here to see what their charming little daughter was doing.

Giving Fallon a little nudge towards the building, Cagalli maneuvered the little witch to the clinic with Lacus trailing after them.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Yzak walked down the nearly empty halls with a vengeance. He had finished his exams in fifteen minutes, which was a joke. Now for the good part. He was going to wait in front of Dearka's class room and strangle his soul out of his soon-to-be battered Coordinator body if he had to, just to get the information he needed about Kari and the reason why he kept on asking about her freaking family tree.

Much to his pleasure, the blonde Coordinator was already walking out of his classroom, stretching his arms over his head, then blowing at his fingernails cockily as if saying the exam was a piece of cake. The moment he saw Yzak approaching, his face broke into a smile.

"Yzak! Hello th – what the fu – "

The Duel pilot grabbed him by the collar with both hands with no such preamble, slammed his back against the wall then breathed into his face. He had been wanting to do that for the past week now but could not do so because he was either studying with Kari, or Miriallia was with Dearka. "You will answer me right now. You saw something in the MemS about Kari that you are not telling me. _What was it_?"

Dearka's lavender eyes widened immediately and tried to pry his friend's hands off of him. He was failing miserably. "Are you absolutely out of your head?"

Yzak shook him violently. "If you do not tell me what it is you saw, I'm making sure at least one of us loses a head. Now talk!" he hissed as quietly as he could.

Dearka, however, grabbed him on his collar and shook him back. "Now wait just a damn minute. Right now, I'm just too elated to even consider kicking the crap out of you for attacking me, completely unprovoked, in a public setting. Now, if you let me go, I will let this pass."

Yzak shook him again, this time making his head bounce on the wall behind him.

"Ow!" he cried. Yzak did not feel sorry for him. He shook him even more.

"Tell me!" Yzak snarled. He was in the brink of grabbing him around the neck when someone behind him cleared his throat loudly as if asking to be noticed. When he finally did turn around, he saw Kira and Athrun, both of their backpacks slung over their shoulders, each with a questioning expression on their faces.

"You do know that you're not allowed to kill each other in the hallway, right?" Kira inquired, looking up and down the hall to make sure no classes were disturbed. "Can't you guys wait til you get back to the dorms?"

Yzak hesitantly kept his grip on Dearka's collar, then, giving the Buster pilot one final shake, let him go grudgingly. "What do you guys want?"

Athrun shrugged as he eyed Dearka while the tan boy fixed his collar as he grumbled to himself. "Nothing. We were just on our way to the cafeteria to get something to drink. Then we saw you – " he pointed at Yzak. " – trying to ram him against the wall. Something I didn't expect you to do. Kari wouldn't approve of that, you know."

Yzak felt his blood pressure rise a notch. He hated it. Athrun and the rest had actually mastered that little technique of having Kari's name brought up every time he lost his temper. Much to his displeasure, it always worked. He stuffed his hands into his pockets then gazed down at his shoes. "She still has exams," he muttered.

Kira nodded. "I think Lacus and Cagalli already got off of theirs early. They weren't in their rooms when we checked."

At the mention of this, Dearka wilted. "Well, I have to go and see if Milly is still in her class… "

Kira eyed him questioningly. "Everything okay?"

The Buster pilot shrugged uncomfortably. "Yeah, but she hasn't actually been that responsive lately… I think she may be mad at me." He looked really uncomfortable right now.

Yzak did not care the least bit about Dearka's love life. Personally, he thought that the ass deserved it. He seemed to be keeping too many things from everyone lately. He punched him roughly on the shoulder. "Do you mind? You never answered my question."

Dearka eyed him weirdly. "You are one disturbed individual." He looked away at once. Yzak instantly knew he was hiding something good.

Athrun bit his lip unconsciously, looked over to the direction of the gym. "Is it still about what Dearka saw in the MemS?"

Yzak nodded. "For some weird reason, Dearka won't tell me anything."

"It's really nothing. Can we drop this?"

"No."

"_Shhhh!_"

Yzak suddenly jumped at the sudden hiss coming from behind them. There, standing right in the middle of the hall, was Mrs. Takano, her hands propped firmly on her hips, a stern and very, very mean look on her face.

"What is it in the Silence sign that you do not understand, boys?" was what she asked, making Athrun and Kira look at everything but the guidance councilor.

Yzak bit his lip, slightly pissed that Dearka had to get away from being interrogated. Again. He was starting to wonder if they guy had an angel watching over him.

"Why are you loitering in the halls while exams are going on?"

"We're already finished, Mrs. Takano. The instructor told us to just step out of the classroom to avoid disturbing the others," Athrun explained.

The teacher's cat-like eyes darted towards the Justice pilot. Athrun nearly shrunk. "And so you decide to disturb the class from outside?"

Kira opened his mouth as if to protest, but the teacher raised her hand to cut him off. "You four. Please make noise somewhere else. You may be finished with your exams, but please do not try to ruin it for the rest of them." She gestured with her hands as if to shoo them away. "Now go."

Yzak did not bother to argue with her. He was not in the mood for anything else but kick the living daylights out of his friend if he still refused to comply.

They went to proceed to look for a better place to stay and wait for the girls and beat Dearka up.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Milly looked up and straightened when she saw a familiar head of strawberry blonde hair bobbing up and down at the top of the neatly trimmed hedges lining the library path. She was bending down to retrieve the Pepsi from the vending machine before she got distracted by the person she immediately recognized as Yzak's girlfriend.

Milly hurriedly grabbed her drink and called out. "Kari! Over here!"

She watched as the strawberry blonde head stopped and a face popped from over the bushes, revealing Kari's placid face scouting around for whoever called out to her. Milly waved happily and the girl smiled before disappearing from behind the hedge then making her way around to meet her.

"Hello there. Where are you off to?" Miriallia asked her as she reached her.

Kari tilted her head to the right. "I was on my way to the gym to check on the MemS before I meet up with Yzak."

At the mention of this, Miriallia's ears prickled. Those machines. Dearka had seen something in them that he never told her. He was not that kind of person to keep secrets from her. But right now, that was pretty much the only thing he has been doing lately.

Kari looked down at Milly's hands then dug into her pocket. "I think I could use a drink, too." She inserted a few coins into the machine, made her selection and out came a can of orange juice. She opened the can but did not drink. Instead, she turned back to Miriallia. Blinking twice, she nodded to her. "Would you like to come with me?"

Miriallia looked left, then right, uncertain if that would be a good idea. She was starting to think about things like –

Kari shook her head. "Athrun took off the memory card before Dearka and Fallon used the machines. I know what you're thinking. I thought of it before, and I was really disappointed when I found out Athrun did that."

Milly felt her face flush slightly. She almost forgot Kari could be so perceptive. "I had wanted to pry, even when I know it could be wrong."

"Hm," was all Kari said before taking a small sip of her orange juice.

Milly and Kari were never really that close, and it seemed as if she only talked a lot when Yzak was around, but when left alone with other people, Kari was perpetually quiet. This, however, does not make Milly like her less. In fact, she was very fond of her especially since she was the only one who could make Yzak appear more… human. But not only once was she tempted to ask if she knew what Dearka was hiding from her, or the reason why he was being so evasive when it came to his father. Yet she felt like she had no right to pry. No, that would be rude.

Milly looked over to the soccer field that could be seen from where they were and wondered where Lacus and Cagalli could be. She was about to ask Kari if she wanted to go and look for the others when she saw someone hurrying down the stairs which led to the Laboratories and Workshops. The brown hair and grey eyes made her smile.

"Yalin!" She called, waving with her free hand.

Kari looked over her shoulder to look at the boy she just called out to, then took another sip of her drink. "Hm," she said again.

At the sound of her voice, Yalin's head shot up, eyes searching the place until his sight fell upon them. Milly tried to wave at him again, but was immediately alarmed when she saw why he was such in a hurry. He was holding his left wrist with his right hand. His left palm was bleeding. Nonetheless, the moment he saw Miriallia, his worried face broke into a bright smile. In an attempt to hide his wound, he clenched his bleeding hand into a fist, making him wince amid his smile.

"Hey there Milly. Kari," he greeted as he stepped up in front of them, then tried to stuff his hand into his pocket, but Milly seized it, making Yalin cry out in surprise and pain.

"Open," Milly ordered as she shook his wounded hand as if to coax it.

Kari peered down at the bleeding palm when the boy obediently showed his wound. "That one is nasty. However did you get it?"

Milly bend down and placed the can of Pepsi by her foot and started to dig into her tote bag for her hanky. When she finally found it, she pressed it onto Yalin's wound and applied pressure on it.

Yalin sheepishly scratched his head of brown hair. "I was in the Chem lab earlier and I knocked over a graduated cylinder. I tried to save it but when I finally caught it, it hit a wall and shattered in my hands." He muttered an embarrassed "thank you" to Milly as he took the hanky from her and pressed it on his own wound.

Kari stared at the boy intently, then at Milly before nodding wordlessly. She sipped her drink once more, then nodded again. "You should see the school nurse about that cut."

Yalin grinned. "Yeah, I was on my way there, but I saw you guys so I thought I'd say hi first."

Miriallia frowned. "You're bleeding all over the school, and you wanted to say hi?"

The boy shrugged indifferently. "It doesn't matter. Where are you two off to?"

Milly bent down a picked up her Pepsi. "Nowhere in particular, really."

"I'm off to the gym, though," Kari said. She gave Milly and Yalin a significant look before smiling one of her serene smiles. "Maybe I will see you later?"

Milly nodded at her and waved weakly. "Sure." She watched her turn around and float away with her pretty hair swaying on her shoulders as she turned back to her earlier course to the gym, her head bobbing up and down once again behind the hedges. She began to think how wonderful she was, for having reached the serenity Milly has always envied. When it came to stubbornness and secrecy, Dearka was nowhere as hard as Yzak to understand.

Yalin cleared his throat as if to get her attention. "Well, I think I'd better go as well. Considering I'm still cut open and all…" He gestured at his hand where Miriallia's now bloody hanky was. "I'll get you another handkerchief, I promise."

Miriallia absentmindedly watched the mysterious girl walk away while popping open her can of Pepsi. "No, no. It's okay… Keep it."

Yalin frowned. "No, really. I'll – Milly? Milly?"

Miriallia shook herself out of her reverie when Kari finally disappeared from sight. She looked over to Yalin. "I'm sorry. I wasn't listening." She gestured towards him. "I'll walk you to the clinic. I'm looking for Cagalli and Lacus anyway."

At the mention of the Songstress' name, Miriallia saw Yalin flush slightly. He recovered in an instant. "Ah, sure. Shall we?"

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Kari shut her eyes tight as she walked along the path that led to the gym, trying desperately to get rid of that extreme ringing of her ears and the slight throbbing of her temples. She did not know how to explain the feeling, even if she referred to it as a mere headache, as Yzak kept on insisting for her to describe it. It was not really painful. It was more easily described as an itch you could not scratch, as it feels like someone or something was acting like an uninvited guest in the caverns of her subconscious.

She frowned. She did not like the feeling, not because she did not like irritation, but because she did not like it when she did not understand things. And of course, she did not like it when Yzak was worrying. For someone who pretended nothing worried him, he sure worried a lot. Though she did appreciate it. Even as much as she appreciated him helping her out with so many things. Given that he complained a lot, he would still do it. The War game, the Memory Simulators… the little Kotex incident.

The thought made her smile a small smile. Hadn't that been absolutely priceless?

Her thoughts were interrupted when she saw four figures coming out of the building and walking towards the gym through the soccer field. She squinted and was mildly pleased to see that it was Yzak and his friends. What a delight! She didn't have to look for him at all.

She shoved the throbbing out of her head and for the moment glided her way towards the four. Yzak saw her halfway, hit his best friend, Dearka, painfully on the shoulder, then started jogging towards her. Kari saw the three boys look after him, then started whispering to each other with sly smiles on their faces.

"Hello," Kari said the moment the light-haired Coordinator reached her, acting smug as usual, when she could see completely he was pleased to see her as she was to see him. Much to her surprise, though, instead of the usual gruff greeting, Yzak leaned down and kissed her on the cheek and pulled away with a grunt.

Kari, although she never did lurk on the surprising parts of life, was a bit reeling. She discovered that she liked the feeling. Smiling, she offered him her drink. "Would you like some?"

Yzak looked down at the can of orange juice, then snorted. "No thanks."

Kari laughed gaily. "All right. Where are you off to?"

The Duel pilot gestured behind him, where Kira and the rest were making their way in the gym, and Dearka giving them one final gaze before disappearing into the double doors. "There. I don't even know why we bother." He stared down at her worriedly. "How – "

"I'm fine, Yzak. Don't worry."

For a split second, he looked annoyed, but immediately brushed the statement away. "Where you going?"

"Same place where you're going. I'm here to check the MemS."

She saw Yzak stifle a frustrated sigh. She knew what he was feeling. She had always known. Her boyfriend never knew why she ever built those machines in the first place…

"Go ahead. Say it," Yzak suddenly snarled as he turned away, the scar over his nose bridge contorting as he wrinkled his nose.

Kari had to laugh at this before explaining her purpose. "In the same rehabilitation center you have been to in Higashimokoto, there is a department for little kids who have had traumas in war. Many children from North America and East Asia who have experienced the horrors of war are brought there for… sessions…" Kari winced at the thought. "They have machines there that resemble the MemS, but unlike my design, they do not simply simulate your memories."

Yzak looked down at her, eyeing her cautiously as if fearing that she would think he was interested. "What do they do?" he asked nonchalantly.

Kari looked him straight in the eye. "They erase them."

Yzak's eyes narrowed. "Why?"

Kari shrugged. "Let's just say that it's easier to make them better when they don't remember why they are sad in the first place." She reached out with her free hand and took his gently, leading him to start walking towards the gym. "I tried to design a machine that was inspired by these, but instead of making them forget, I was hoping to make them remember."

She felt Yzak stiffen, his grip tightening around her fingers. "Why?" he asked.

"Because I truly believe that forgetting your past and your problems does not make it any better." She took a sip of her orange juice then offered it once again to Yzak, which this time, he took. "Cases have happened to young children where they would start to ask what happened at this certain time, and no one would have the answers to any of them, so I thought the MemS would be a nice experiment."

Of course, the term outraged Yzak. "Experiments? You were going to open it to the public last summer! These are too dangerous machines you are messing with."

Kari shook his head. "Dangerous depending on the user." She looked up at him. "The MemS will not make anything out of your memories but show them as they were beheld. I think the only wrong thing I did was I allowed a network between all four units, ending into a mush of scary point of views."

"But Kari…" Yzak started, making her stop walking. It was seldom she would hear him say her name so gently. "Why can't I see your memories?"

This time, she had to think for an answer. After a few seconds of silence, she took back her orange juice from a bewildered Yzak, took a sip then nodded. "Hm…"

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Lacus looked into her tote bag when she felt Mr. Pink once again squirm violently between her books. Admittedly, the little thing was a bit naughty, and it really was a hard object. No wonder Fallon's arm was swelling to the size of a papaya. This somehow made Lacus a bit grateful that the kid now cooperated the moment she saw what was happening to it.

"_Harooo? Harooooo?" _Mr. Pink muttered and Lacus shot it a considerably stern look. The haro kept quiet.

Cagalli, who was walking ahead of her a few steps, holding Fallon by the shoulder in case she would make a run for it, looked over her shoulder and gave her a toothy grin. Lacus had to smile then. Looking at Cagalli always made her smile. Her hair was starting to grow on her friend, and she seldom got to pick on it unlike before.

"Now I see why Kira hated it. It's noisy, and deadly," the Princess of Orb said before turning back to the hall that led to the clinic.

Lacus stuck out her tongue playfully. "He was lucky he never saw the time when I had about a dozen multi-colored haros. The Clyne mansion had never experienced a dull day ever since they came in twos and threes."

Cagalli let out an involuntarily. "I don't see how you can do it. It's a good thing Athrun never gave me any mechanical stuff."

Lacus blinked in astonishment. This was the first time that Cagalli actually said something that could resemble Lacus and Athrun's past without getting melancholic. She decided that this was a good thing. "Maybe you should ask something from him?"

Cagalli snorted. "I don't think so." She looked down at Fallon. "How are you?"

The blonde half-Coordinator did not say anything. Lacus watched the back of the kid's head, concerned. She wondered why she would choose to be so bitter about everything around her.

Cagalli crossed her arms over her chest and shook her head. "Golly, what did I ever do to you? I'm even trying to be nice to you and you don't talk to me?"

Silence.

Cagalli sniffed. "Fine. See if I care."

Lacus laughed good-naturedly and Cagalli shrugged her shoulders in surrender. They let the child be silent until they got to the clinic.

The moment they got there, however, Miriallia and – much to their surprise – Yalin were exiting the door of their destination. The good-looking boy had one hand bandaged, the other hand held a bloody handkerchief.

Milly brightened the moment she saw the two. "There you are! I was looking all over for you."

Lacus looked at her friend, then at Yalin, and wondered why they were together. But Lacus being Lacus – who bore no malicious bone in her body – gave Yalin a polite bow when he made eye contact.

She had never really made such a big deal of the attention Yalin used to give her then, simply because she did not want to. Kira had been very jealous of it even if he never told her anything, and hadn't Yzak practically snapped the guy's head off one time they met down town while Cagalli had a haircut? He did not know what Dearka had to say about him, nor Athrun, but Milly seemed to get along with the guy really well. But that was because she was Milly.

However, what made Lacus curious was how Fallon reacted. The girl gasped the moment Yalin's eyes lingered on her, and she quickly – surprisingly – ducked behind Cagalli, gripping at her uniform, making the princess look at her strangely. Honestly, Lacus could not decipher Fallon's behavior when it came to men. She could be as savage as a tiger when she sees Dearka, and now is as meek as a lamb with Yalin. She was certainly wondering how she really expressed her feelings to a person she cared about. She had honestly thought Fallon liked Dearka…

Cagalli tried to pull at Fallon after she gave Yalin a dirty look. "What are you hiding there for? Let's go inside and have the nurse take a look at your arm."

Fallon eyed her angrily, cheeks blazing as if embarrassed for some weird reason.

Cagalli shook her head and rolled her eyes. "Don't give me that…"

Lacus approached Fallon from behind and touched her shoulder briefly, but the child recoiled from her once more, hissing violently like a cat. "Don't touch me."

This time, even before Cagalli could react, Yalin frowned and stepped forward, displeased. "Hey, that's not a nice thing to say to people who are being nice to you."

Lacus blinked in surprise, Cagalli stared at Yalin, flabbergasted. But the one who took most of the shock was none other than Fallon. The girl's cheeks got even redder, either from embarrassment or fury, and she backed away from the group slowly.

"W-why?" she stuttered. "Why is it that I lost everything dear to me, and still everyone defends _your kind?_"

Lacus' brows furrowed as she watched Fallon back up another step.

"Now that's not fair!" Miriallia said, gesturing at the half-Coordinator. The Songstress wondered why she would stand up for Lacus and not Dearka. "You're making it look like you're the only victim of this war!"

Fallon shook her head stubbornly. "None of you would be able to understand, so why don't you just give up and leave me alone!" She hugged her swollen arm to her chest, and with a quick turn, she ran down the hall away from them at unbelievably fast pace.

"Hey, wait!" Cagalli cried. She took off in a dead run after her. Lacus did not know what to do. She was about to run after them when a blur of brown hair flashed past her. Yalin had took off in pursuit of Fallon as well.

Lacus turned to Milly desperately. The girl had a disappointed expression on her face. "Are you all right?"

After a few moments of silence, Milly nodded. "Yes, I'm fine. It's just that… she almost sounded like me… when Tolle died…"

Lacus opened her mouth to say something, but found out she did not have anything to say. She bowed her head slightly before touching Milly's shoulder. "Come on. Let's go after them, shall we?"

Milly nodded.

The chase did not last very long, however. What with Cagalli hot on Fallon's trail and Yalin close behind, Lacus and Milly had found Fallon with her back to the wall of the gym, and Cagalli and Yalin cornering her. The girl did not look too happy, and in some way, Lacus actually felt sorry for her, that perhaps it would be better if they just let her go. After getting her arm treated, that is. She winced when she saw the arm. It did not look pretty.

Milly frowned when she saw Fallon holding her head with her good hand, and started to nibble her lower lip anxiously. "Lacus, I think something's wrong…"

With this the two girls hurriedly approached the three. Lacus knew it would not have been that easy for Fallon to get caught, especially if she did not want to. She was caught because something was up.

Fallon grabbed a fistful of her hair and her face scrunched up in irritation. "It's that feeling… that feeling again…"

Cagalli turned to Lacus uncertainly before trying to reach out to her as if to touch her, but Fallon flailed her bad arm aimlessly for her to stay away. This time, Lacus only watched as it seemed quite futile to ask her to come with them peacefully. Milly gripped her arm tight as they went to come a bit closer. Fallon had started trailing the wall east to the door of the gym, murmuring again and again something about her head, a presence of some sort, in her head…

Cagalli tried to get to her again, but backed away when the girl finally got up to her feet with the help of the door of the gym she finally reached.

Lacus could not take it any more. She did not care if the girl beat her senseless. She could not help but realize she was not in pain, but in some sort of discomfort… She hurriedly ran forward and was about to take her into her arms when the door of the gym suddenly burst open, revealing a very annoyed-looking Yzak and a curious Kari who looked like she had swallowed a lemon.

With this, Fallon gasped in surprise as she jumped away from the door and right into Lacus' arms.

And right then and there, the strangest thing happened. Kari, her face paler than usual, slowly looked down onto the girl in Lacus' arms, and for a split second, startling green eyes met startling green eyes… Fallon stared back as she finally stopped whimpering, and Lacus could have sworn she had stopped breathing.

It was as if everything around them froze for that one brief moment. And Lacus did not even know what happened after that… All she heard was Fallon saying, _"Who are you…?"_ before finally collapsing into her, and Yzak crying out as Kari fainted and nearly toppled over had he not caught her with an embrace.

And the last thing she felt was panic when Cagalli finally explained what was going on in one loud yell. "Oh, God they fainted!"

Lacus looked down into her arms and gasped as she tried desperately to wake Fallon up. "Fallon, Fallon! Are you all right?" She looked up when she saw Yalin taking the girl from her and she took the advantage to see Yzak sweeping Kari off of her feet. The Duel pilot was shaking so bad she could not believe it. Suddenly, Kira, Dearka and Athrun were there coming out of the gym, horror and confusion marring their faces at what the heck was happening.

"I don't know… I don't know…" was the only thing she could say.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

**_Better late than never, so I guess I'll be greeting you a merry Christmas and a Happy new year! I couldn't believe I finally got my draft all figured out with just a piece of paper, a pencil and a plate of graham cake! Yes, I finally got everything figured out. Although yes, I'm still a bit out of it from all the food, I tried to get this update typed as soon as I can. _**

**_Actually I was hoping to get up a Christmas one shot, but this Christmas has left me utterly uninspired… It's strange. I couldn't seem to get my brain to think of any good things to write about. _**

_**Oh well… I hope you had a wonderful holiday! Forgive the cliffie. By now, I'm sure you are used to it. XD Don't worry. Seven more chapters to go and you will no longer have to suffer from my annoying habit of leaving you hanging. XD**_


	39. Phase 39: Before the Revelation

**_I've come back from the dead!!! Holy crap!!!_**

_**0--0--0--0**_

Yzak did not believe he could take any more of this frigging drama. And even if he could, he did not believe he wanted to.

Kari was lying down on the couch and had woken up on occasion only to look at him then close her eyes and sleep. He had watched her do so several times already from the chair opposite the couch. For the first time in his life he had not felt impatient. Whatever annoying feeling he might possibly possess was crushed by complete and utter worry.

Dearka approached him from the kitchen. Yzak did not notice him until he was standing right in front of him.

"Hey," Dearka started.

Yzak looked at him blankly. When he didn't talk, Dearka shifted from one foot to another, not really knowing what to do.

Yzak buried his face in his hands. "What do you want?"

He heard Dearka shift once more. "Nothing. I was just… well…" More shifting. "Are you sure you're all right?"

It was the most out of place question in the entire world. Yzak lifted his face to look over at Kari. He watched as her chest slowly rose and fell with every breath. He started to wonder if she had some sort of sickness. That thought made him wince. He hoped to the gods he didn't even believe in that she wasn't sick. He believed his life had enough drama in it as it is.

"Where did you take Fallon?" Yzak asked.

"To the orphanage. We didn't know where else to bring her."

"Is she all right? Has she woken up yet?"

Dearka looked surprised. The question that came close to caring was not something Yzak usually asked. "She's been up and about half an hour after we brought her there." His eyes darted to Kari a moment. "How long has she been out?"

"Three hours? Maybe four? Who cares?" Yzak rubbed his nose with his thumb and forefinger, slightly feeling his scar and wincing at the memory of it. "Damn it…"

He felt Dearka watching him silently. This was one thing that surprised him the most. Dearka was never at a loss for words when he was in a bad mood. He just never was. Today must prove to be a different day.

Dearka coughed a few times before speaking up finally. "Yzak."

"What?"

"I have something to tell you…"

Yzak raised his eyes back at the Buster pilot, half expecting to hear some sarcastic comment, as this was the usual Dearka thing to say when he was in a foul mood. Much to his surprise, his friend was looking back at him with a sober expression on his bronze face.

"Kari is in Fallon's memory, Yzak. For some weird reason, Kari… no… someone who looks just like her is in that girl's thoughts." Dearka paused a bit, and Yzak took this time to stare at him blankly.

"What the freaking heck are you talking about?" Yzak asked after a while.

Dearka winced. "When I used the MemS with Fallon, that was what I saw. I saw her memories back in Heliopolis, back when we stole the mobile suits. Yzak, her mother, Fallon's mother looks exactly like Kari. Only… older."

Yzak could only stare more. It did not seem to register in his head what Dearka was trying to say. His eyes lingered at Kari as she sighed in her sleep, then shifted to her side, causing her hair to fall across her forehead. She was so beautiful to him that just looking at her made his heart ache. Things he did not like started playing in his head, and he immediately kicked it out of his mind effortlessly. That was one of his most stubborn qualities, or so his mother said. He only believed what he wanted to believe. He shook his head warily. "I don't know what you are talking about."

With this, Dearka wisely did not say anything to elaborate the subject. Sighing in resignation, he scratched his head and nodded ruefully. "I am going back to the orphanage to meet up with Milly." He moved to leave. "There are things I have to tell her too."

Yzak hardly heard him as he walked out of the room, leaving him alone with the sleeping Kari and thoughts about her welfare. He did not like feeling worried. The last time he had actually worried like this was when his mother was sick when he was five years old. He had spent the entire night for two weeks hardly eating or sleeping until his mother came back from the hospital. He was five, and he understood nothing then. He then realized right now that the reason for his worry was ignorance. He had no idea what was happening to Kari, but he damn wished he did.

Closing his eyes and sighing, he decided that things couldn't possibly get any worse. He opened his eyes once more and found Kari staring at him from the couch, her head resting lightly on her arm. Yzak opened his mouth to speak but immediately closed it when Kari's green eyes fluttered once more to a close…

_Dammit!_

Yzak closed his mouth in a snap, grinding his teeth together so hard he wondered if they were going to fall off if he did this continuously. The silly thought flew out of his head when someone knocked on the door.

"Who the damn hell is it?"

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

The moment Dearka left the dorm, he noticed he has spent about fifteen minutes wandering around aimlessly before realizing he wasn't getting anywhere. Pulling himself together, he finally headed off to the orphanage where he knew Miriallia would be waiting. Thoughts about Kari and Fallon and Fallon's thoughts swam in his head like crazy. Along with these were thoughts of his father's arrival in Orb tomorrow. He knew he was going to have to talk to his father today. If he knew his father well – and he did – a voice message would be waiting for him at his dorm room once he got back home informing him to call him back.

He brushed away the thought. In fact, he felt pretty numb about what his father had to say. He already knew what it would be about. What he was worried about was what Miriallia would think about it. He would have to have a long, long talk with her today.

That is, if she would want to talk to him.

By the time he got to the orphanage, he found Miriallia sitting on the couch with Yalin kneeling on the floor by her, looking up at her face worriedly and saying something.

At the sight of this, Dearka felt a strange urge to grab the guy by the hair and bash his face on the ground. He did not think he was capable of such acts of unprovoked violence, but seeing that the guy was this close to his girlfriend did not make him any less jealous than he already was. He wondered what they were talking about.

Then he started to wonder if it concerned him.

Not really knowing what else to do, he turned around to leave. He decided to go back to his room and maybe sort things out clearer by himself. His father was coming to Earth in a matter of days. He was spearheading the aid in Orb, and if he knew his father well – which he did – Tad Elthman would be stopping by Hokkaido for a brief – _brief_ – word with his only son. Sighing in resignation, Dearka exited the orphanage but was caught in complete and utter surprise when he came face to face with the person he was not expecting to see for a very, very long time.

Green eyes and red hair, Kian Takano stood no further than a dozen feet away from him, hands stuffed in his pockets, and although the guy still possessed the arrogant stance and the cocky face, there was little hostility, if any at all, radiating from him, unlike before. If anything, he seemed quite resigned.

Resigned. That was the right word for it.

But the memory of aching ribs and Miriallia being threatened with a knife flashed through his mind and he believed he was more than eager to close the door of the orphanage to keep the guy as far away from Miriallia as possible. He edged closer to the guy, half wondering if he came for him at all.

Kian gave away no signs of leaving however.

Dearka cleared his throat. "Hello," he said, not really knowing how to make a decent preamble that would not make the guy feel like going insane again.

The greeting seemed to have surprised Kian, however. Perhaps he too was expecting something that came close to hostility. Something behind the guy's eyes sparkled, though Dearka did not know what to make of it.　He shifted his weight from one foot to another without saying anything.

Kian looked at hiｍ even more, his gaze so penetrating it made the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end. "Is Kari here?" was what he asked, his eyes slightly darting towards the door of the orphanage.

Dearka felt his body twitch involuntarily as he unconsciously made a move for the door. Miriallia was in there, and only God knows what this guy was capable of doing. He wasn't about to trust him anytime soon within a nine mile radius from Miriallia.

But the moment Kian opened his mouth to speak again, Dearka could not help but blink in confusion.

"Is Yzak here, too?"

Dearka blinked once more when the guy didn't elaborate. This was the last thing he was expecting from the fellow. Of all the people Kian was going to look for, he wondered what he wanted with Yzak.

He decided that whatever he did want, it was not going to be good. "I'm sorry. He's not."

The response Dearka gave him seemed to have surprised Kian for a split second. The Buster pilot wondered if he believed him. Or perhaps he was not expecting a decent reply from someone who had beaten his gang into a pulp.

"I see," was all he said after a while of silence. His green eyes shifted from left to right as if looking for the right words to say. After a while, he opened his mouth to speak. "Do you know where they are? If so, can you tell me?"

Of course he wasn't about to tell him. He shrugged and shook head. "I'm sorry. I don't."

Kian frowned. The gesture did not make him look any less menacing when they first met him. "I… see." With this he nodded. "Thank you for your time." And that was when he moved to leave.

Dearka watched Kian turned to leave but caught both of them by surprise when he called out to him silently. "Wait."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Athrun looked over his shoulder at Kira, who looked back at him with an unreadable expression. The Justice pilot did not like it when he did not know what Kira was thinking. He was seldom very secretive about his emotions about such important matters that it made him swallow in nervousness before knocking on Yzak and Dearka's dorm room door, which was crudely patched with an uneven plywood Dearka found under the sink not a few weeks back.

"Who the damn hell is it?" came a very, very pissed voice from behind the door.

Athrun once again turned to Kira. "Can you tell me again why we are doing this?"

Kira looked at him straight in the eye. "So that we can get this over with as soon as possible."

_He knows something_, Athrun thought. He remembered Kira being the one who solved the mystery behind the MemS being machines that reflect the regret in one's subconscious. Could it be that he had a clue about what just happened in the gym? If he did, Athrun wished he would pick a better time to confront Yzak about it.

Athrun snapped his head forward when the door in front of him banged open, hitting the nearby coat rack and making it topple over noisily. Yzak's snarling face zoomed into view and Athrun fought himself from taking a step back.

"What the hell do you want?" the Duel pilot growled at him undiplomatically and Athrun immediately turned to Kira once again to answer to Yzak's question.

Kira, much to Athrun's relief, did have an answer. "We need you and Kari at the gym as soon as possible."

Unfortunately, the answer did not give any explanation as to _why_ he wanted them there. Obviously, Yzak _wanted_ an explanation. He paused for a while as if waiting for one, and when none came, he exploded.

"And how do you expect me to get Kari out of this room all the way to A.U. when she hasn't even friggin' woken up ever since I took her here?"

"If you have to carry her out – if I have to carry her out – then that would be a good way to start it…"

There was only one word that came from Yzak'S insolent mouth. After a pause, he spit it out hesitantly, if not curiously. "Why?"

Kira finally had an answer to what Athrun was wondering about in the first place. "I have a feeling that we can figure out what's going on with everything. If only we can have Kari use the MemS…"

Yzak shook his head, but nonetheless stepped aside as if to let them in. "It won't work. I've tried it many times before with her. The system boots me out as soon as I breach her memories."

"Have you tried it with Fallon?" Kira asked.

At that instant, Athrun felt his eyebrows raised a notch at what Kira just said. He looked at Kira then at Yzak, who had a light on his face as if suddenly realizing what the Freedom pilot was trying to say. Athrun could not help but realize the same thing. It was all too suspicious to be coincidental, the "headaches", or so Yzak had referred to it. Suddenly, a thought crossed his mind so horribly familiar that he shook it out of him the second he saw the mask of a face float up in his mind. Instead, he watched as Yzak head over to the sofa and hitched Kari into her arms effortlessly. The girl's eyes fluttered for a moment and Yzak murmured a few words to her. Athrun did not know if she understood what the Duel pilot just said, but even if she did, she gave no signs of it. Her eyes once again fluttered to a close.

Yzak turned to Kira expectantly. "Are you sure of this?"

Kira nodded, but Athrun could not miss the hesitation in his voice as Kira spoke. "There are four machines in the gym all networked. If we use the memory chip, I have a feeling we can get some sort of result…"

Yzak evidently swallowed, anxious. Yzak was never anxious… "Who will use the machines?"

"You, Kari and Fallon."

"And the other machine?"

Kira looked at Yzak straight in the eye. "And me."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Miriallia shivered, and it wasn't even that cold. She looked down at Fallon who was crouched in the steps of the gym, her head buried between her knees. She had assumed that position the moment they got there. When Miriallia tried to talk to her, she would simply shake her head and moan.

Yalin signed impatiently next to her, shifting from one foot to another. "I don't know what's going on, but for some weird reason, I'm not liking this."

Miriallia bit her lip. Neither was she. There where a lot of things that she had in her mind that she did not expect Kira to add up to it. She wished he had picked a better time to make the announcement about meeting in the gym, She hated this place, There were too many bad memories and happenings in it. She shivered again and Yalin looked at her worriedly.

"Are you all right?"

"Yes. No. I don't know. Maybe."

"Are you cold?"

"No. It's just this place that makes me very, very uncomfortable…"

Yalin looked over his shoulder to the dark interior of the gym and frowned. Miriallia followed his gaze and grimaced at the sight of silhouettes of four bulky machines inside. Kira had not said what he wanted with them here. She did not even believe she wanted to know. She just didn't want to be there.

Looking up when someone called her name, she felt a little relief at seeing Cagalli and Lacus hurry towards them from the bus stop. Looking at the Princess of Orb's heavy jacket and the Songstress' wool scarf, she wished she had brought something warmer. She was not expecting it to be this eerily cold near the gym.

"Are they here yet?" Cagalli asked without so much as a preamble as she reached Miriallia's side. She ignored Yalin's presence completely as if he weren't there.

"Not yet. Do you know what Kira is up to?" Miriallia asked.

Cagalli shook her head. "Why on Earth does he want to meet here, of all places?"

Lacus shivered despite her warm attire. "I think he wants to use _those_ again."

Of course, everyone knew what she meant by _those_. Miriallia did not like the idea of using _those_ at all. One would think that Kira had had enough dealing with those horrible things.

Cagalli muttered something incoherent under her breath and for the first time noticed Fallon sitting on the stairs of the gym like a rock. The Princess' brows wrinkled in worry but she did not say anything. Miriallia herself did not know what to say about her. Something at the back of her mind gnawed at her speculations that Kari and Fallon were somehow connected, but that ball of speculation was something she did not like to ponder upon. Once again, she shivered. There were too many coincidences between the two. It reminded her so much of –

"There they are," Cagalli suddenly said, snapping Miriallia out of her trance.

Looking up and squinting in the distance, Miriallia could hardly make out three tall shadows from the soccer field. She wished they had met a little earlier. The setting sun casting looming shadows of the buildings of A.U. did not actually create a mood that she would have preferred. The absence of even the slightest breeze made the school even emptier than it usually would have at this certain time and Miriallia did not like it.

As they finally came close enough for Miriallia to make out who they were, she saw Kira, his head bent in thought, Athrun whose face was as usual wearing an unreadable on his serious face, and Yzak, whose face was not looking where he was going but was instead looking down at the burden in his arms. Miriallia nibbled at her lower lip worriedly. Kari was in the Duel Pilot's arms, obviously unconscious. Miriallia wondered if she had been sleeping the whole time since fainting earlier in the gym.

It was then did she realize that someone was missing.

"Dearka isn't with them…?" Lacus asked for her as she looked at Miriallia questioningly.

Miriallia did not reply. Lately, Dearka had been avoiding her like she were the plague. Or perhaps she had been avoiding him? Either way, she could not remember the last time she had spent quality time with him. It was as if he was always somewhere else, including now. Where the heck was he?

Cagalli met the three halfway and exchanged a few words with Athrun. Miriallia watched as the Justice pilot shrugged at what Cagalli said. After a moment, Cagalli shook her head as if in protest then gestured wildly at Kari and Yzak.

Lacus tugged at a loose pink lock of hair near her ear and uneasily shifted on her feet. "What could they be arguing about…?"

Miriallia could only wonder the same thing. She straightened expectantly when the group finally reached them. Cagalli was arguing with Athrun profusely that it started to sound more like pleading. She could barely make out Fallon gripping her head in the corner of her eye.

"I don't see the point in doing this at this time," the Princess was saying desperately as Kira and Yzak brushed passed her and Athrun without a word, straight into the darkness of the gym. "The least you can do is find a better time than now!"

Athrun could only look at her with a deadpan expression in his aqua eyes. "Any time is as bad as now, Cagalli, when using those machines."

At what Athrun said, Lacus let out an involuntary gasp and Miriallia could have sworn she had gasped herself. So they really were going to use the MemS…! What on Earth could Kira be thinking? Hadn't it been enough damage that they have used it many times before only to end in disaster?

Yalin watched the drama enfold in front of him, obviously lost and not trying to hide it. He scratched his head and once or twice tried to open his mouth as if to say something only to close it again when Cagalli got in a word edgewise. Miriallia swallowed hard, and although there were too many questions she wanted to ask, she got no nerve to get in the conversation that was obviously not getting anywhere. The moment she looked over her shoulder, she could see Kira and Yzak fiddling with the four machines, and much to her horror, the unconscious Kari was strapped into one of them.

"Athrun, please. Don't do this," Cagalli was saying as she wrung her hands together anxiously.

Athrun looked at her with an affectionate, apologetic smile. "It's not for me to stop. Kira thought of it, and Yzak agreed. Now all we need is her." The Justice pilot gestured at a curled up Fallon sitting on the stairs and sighed. "Somehow, I'm dreading this as well, but a part of me thinks it's the best way to find out what is going on with them…"

Miriallia had feared this. It was as if the puzzle was that close to getting solved but her fear of the outcome was winning in her. She wondered what they would be uncovering in their memories.

"Can you help Fallon over here, Athrun? We'll strap her in before Yzak and I jack in." Kira called from inside the gym, and Athrun nodded to comply.

Miriallia swallowed for the umpteenth time that hour. She needed someone to hold her or she feared that she would topple over from the suspense.

What could they uncover in the MemS this time?

Kari and Fallon… Kira and Yzak… Why the four? What could the connection be?

_Dearka, where are you?_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

**_A/N: After over a year of disappearing, I've finally miraculously found the inspiration to continue this. The update may be short, as compared to my other chapters, but please bear with me. Time is a luxury I cannot afford lately, but wish to have. _**

**_Thank you to all the readers of this fic who have emailed me throughout the year and to those who have patiently waited for the next chapter of TIH. You do not know how happy I am to know that people appreciate my work, however inconsistent I may be with updates…_**


	40. Phase 40: When You Wake Up After a Dream

_**I'm still alive! **_

_**0--0--0--0**_

Lacus watched Athrun help a shivering Fallon to her feet, and the songstress cannot help but wring her hands together nervously. She wished Kira would explain a bit more before this. And somehow she knew that everyone shared her feelings about this. Even a short explanation would do.

Yalin, who was standing a few feet from her and looking even more left out than earlier, was looking at Kira and Yzak, whose heads were bent together silently. "Can anyone tell me what's going on? Or is anyone as lost as I am?"

Lacus looked over to him, and wondered for the first time what Yalin was doing here anyway. "Perhaps we should ask Kira."

Athrun did the asking for them as he guided Fallon towards the MemS. "What do you have in mind, Kira? I can tell you've networked the machines again, but I still don't see what you're up to."

Kira was silent for a moment, as if searching for the right words to use. He nodded. "I've studied the notes Yzak had taken down. His observations were clear, but I still want to find out if my conclusion is correct or not."

Lacus sniffed nervously. She did not want Kira to have anything with those machines. "What did you find out?"

Kira gave her an affectionate look, and for a moment Lacus relaxed. She wanted to reach out to him, be near him, but her legs would not move. He looked different. With the light of the setting sun directly into the Freedom Pilot's eyes, one would easily mistake him to be in Seed Mode.

"I gave the memory chip a final go, and I couldn't help realize that to get through someone else's memories, you'd have to get through yours that would somehow be even the tiniest bit connected to memories of the person you want to see."

Athrun, however, was skeptical. "I never went through anyone else's memories when…" his voice faltered at the remembrance of the time he had used the machines. "When I had a go at it…"

"That's because we didn't insert the memory chip in it. If we had, like when Yzak and Kari used the MemS before, Yzak saw memories that I had, regrets that I had, even when I wasn't using it with them."

This still did not convince Athrun. "But when I used the MemS with you, I was never connected to your memories or regrets. All I saw were… were mine."

Kira looked at Athrun, then at Lacus. She could not meet his eyes longer than a second. She did not wish to be reminded of these thoughts, not with Cagalli there. She stole a peek at the Princess. Cagalli was determined not to look away, but Lacus could tell her eyes were glassy from trying too hard.

Kira nodded. "That's because, at that time, I didn't have a single regret in the world."

With this, Lacus had to look back at Kira, who was now looking at the machines behind him, a faint blush rising on his cheeks.

Athrun gave them both a rueful smile. Lacus saw Cagalli look at the floor.

Kira, who seemed to have noticed the awkwardness of the situation, cleared his throat and continued. "Anyway, at this moment it serves little significance. Think about it. Who have actually used the MemS with the memory chip in it?"

Everyone was silent. Miriallia looked around at the group, as if thinking who really had used the machines.

When no one answered, Kira raised five fingers. "Five people. According to Yzak's notes. Yzak, Kari, Fallon, Dearka and me. And among the mush of memories, there was only one thing in common."

Lacus felt her back tense, anticipating the answer to everything that they had wondered about the mystery in the form of Kari. Everyone in the gym, even Yalin was listening to every word Kira was saying. Miriallia, who before now, had been looking out the gym door was if waiting for someone, had moved a step forward to join the group. Yzak was silently kneeling beside the still unconscious Kari who was strapped in the machines, but his posture said he was listening.

Kira, as if knowing he has everyone's full attention, did not waste a second. He nodded at Fallon. "I want you to tell everyone what you saw in the MemS. Don't leave a singe detail out. Now go."

Fallon's eyes widened, obviously taken by surprise that she had to go first. She sputtered for a few seconds before finally making any sense. "I-I saw the day when… the day when Heliopolis fell…" She gave out a small sob before continuing.　"I saw Dearka, and you and you destroying it…" She pointed a finger at Athrun then Yzak. She didn't talk loud, and if anything she sounded resigned, but the accusation was there.

Kira's lips thinned, as if anticipating something. When Fallon would not continue, he tilted his head inquiringly at the half coordinator. "I told you not to leave anyything out. There must be something else you've seen, right?"

Fallon bit her lower lip nervously, her green eyes shooting from Kari to Yzak, then looked away. "I saw my mommy… the day we got separated in the colony. I saw my mommy and my sister when the panic started, and everyone started to flee and they shoved me inside an escape shuttle. There was room for only one person so they left me to look for another one to ride in, said we will meet on Earth in Orb when we land." Fallon looked down at her hands. They were unsteady, shaking. "All the shuttles came to land in Orb, except for one… When we were released in the shelter in Orb, I looked for them, but they weren't there. So I knew they didn't survive. Then I overheard about the shuttle being blasted in the battle on the way to Earth. And that was when I knew… " She sobbed. "Every shuttle was there except for one. That was when I knew… They were never coming back."

Everyone fell in an awkward silence. Yalin gave a silent cough. No one said a word, until Yzak stood up from Kari's side, and looked at the crying girl, a light in his eyes that did not have anything to do with the setting sun. "It was I who fired at that shuttle…"

The confession came as a surprise to all of them. Fallon looked like she was in a trance as she looked at the Duel pilot with an expression that came between a cross of pain and pure confusion. And then it happened. A scream, a flash of green eyes, and Fallon had run to Yzak, punching him with all her half Coordinator might. Cagalli let out a yell, Yalin gasped as she backed away, Athrun and Kira had the same expression as they looked at Fallon. Could it be pity?

"I hate you! I hate you!" Fallon screamed as she continued to beat at Yzak's chest. The light haired Coordinator looked down at her, his eyes hidden under his hair. He did not fight back, he didn't even try to stop her. "Why did you ever come to Heliopolis? You killed my mother! You killed my family! I hate you! _I hate you!_"

It was all she ever said, how she hated him. Yzak bore all the punches, the scratches. He didn't even seem to flinch. But that was no surprise. The surprise came when Yzak raised his arms and for an unexplainable reason, he hugged her. It was so unexpected that Fallon gasped and froze, rod-straight and trembling.

And then Yzak spoke in a voice so low, everyone was afraid to breathe in case they missed a word. "I don't know what to say to you to make you feel better for what I've done. There were no excuses for it. I wish I could tell you I know how you feel, but I don't. I don't know how it is to lose my mother. I love my mother dearly. I would have killed anyone who would　have hurt her. I wish I could tell you that we share the same love for our mothers, but I can't. My mother is still alive, but yours is no longer here. So I won't take the liberty in lying by telling you I understand. But I wish I could." Yzak tightened his embrace on the girl. "I'm sorry."

Lacus swallowed hard. Who was this kind, soft spoken person? Where had the cold-hearted boy she had known as Yzak gone to?

But Lacus did not have time to ponder. The next thing that happened was so sudden that the Songstress did not know how to react. A loud screech of speeding tires, pattering feet, and Dearka had materialized by the gym door, his large frame blocking out the setting sun, casting a long shadow that stretched across the floor like a dreary ghost.

He was panting, a look in his eyes as if he wanted to explode into a frenzy of words. But there was only one sentence that came from him. "Yzak, take Kari and run!"

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Yzak jerked his head towards Dearka, at first not knowing what the hell he was talking about. Fallon had wrenched herself from his embrace the moment Dearka appeared and had planted herself to the nearby wall. Yzak felt himself open his mouth to speak, to ask Dearka what the hell was going on, but he did not have to.

The next second, Dearka was standing, the next he was being shoved aside as half a dozen men dressed in white barraged inside the gym.

"What's going on here?" Athrun demanded as he and Kira instantly stood between the men and the Memory Simulators where Kari still lay asleep.

Yzak felt his senses sharpen that instant. Vaguely aware of Lacus and Cagalli gathering Fallon and Miriallia at a safe distance, he narrowed his eyes at the men warily. Dearka slowly joined his side, and Yzak could feel his friend tensing immediately. It was a familiar, nostalgic feeling. It almost _– almost –_ felt like getting ready for battle.

The men did not answer his demand, nor Athrun's question. They merely stood there as if weighing the situation. Yzak did not like it. He did not feel afraid of these men. They were not exactly something anyone would fear. They weren't at all that large, nor violent but a second look at their uniforms, he felt merely one emotion; discomfort. He felt like he'd seen those uniforms before…

It was Dearka's voice that brought him back from wondering about these men.

"They're here for Kari, Yzak. They're going to take her away," the Buster pilot said quietly. At the mention of this, Athrun and Kira tensed too, both closing in tighter in front of Kari.

Yzak narrowed his eyes at the men, and for some weird reason, he felt like laughing. It felt like one of those stupid sappy soap operas you see on TV. Only, it was real. And that it was happening to him. He didn't like it that it was his life that was turning into a bad drama. Who were these men, anyway? And what the hell did they want with his girlfriend?

But as if surprises weren't enough for the day, the next person that stepped into the gym made Yzak's heart drop from his chest like a rock. No, it was nothing he would fear more than these men in white. In fact the person was smaller than these men, but made Yzak break a sweat in a heartbeat.

There, walking through the gym door, the same expression on her kind face so much like the first time they had met when they first enrolled in A. U. was none other than the surprise that came in the form of Mrs. Takano.

_Oh, sweet mother of mercy…_

Yzak could not see the lady's face clearly because of the sun behind her, but he could _feel_ her steadiness, as if her reason for being there was all under her plan.

Her voice was calm when she spoke. "I don't want to make this meeting any harder than it is for any of you. So I am going to make it as simple as possible. I want my daughter."

Yzak felt his shoulders go rigid. He had not expected the woman to be so forward about her desire. But the least she could have provided was an explanation.

She and the men with her did not look like they were looking for a fight, but Yzak half wished they were. It was easier to settle things with a good punch. If not easier, at least it was faster than talking. And right now he did not feel like talking.

Yzak spoke through gritted teeth. "And I suppose you are expecting me to give her to you without an explanation?"

Mrs. Takano's reaction was unreadable with the shadows dancing on her face. Her tone did not give anything away either. "It would be easier, my dear boy, if you just hand over my daughter to me, please. As you can see, she has become very… unstable."

Yzak felt his heart skip a beat, his face giving off an irritable twitch. "What the hell are you talking about?"

The sun was now completely gone over the hedges outside the gym, and Yzak's enhanced eyesight finally revealed Mrs. Takano's face. It surprised Yzak that she had, if anything, a resigned expression lingering on her facial features. "I thought you would have figured it by now," she said. "Kari is not your average girl. She is… special. She is not like any of you, nor like me. All the while I have been protecting her from herself, from finding out what she is, and I'm afraid I have been too lenient to have permitted her from running around with a boy." Her eyes flashed at Yzak before finally returning to her daughter, lying in the machines Yzak so despised.

Yzak turned his face away from her, but kept her in the corner of his eye. An unfamiliar emotion bubbled at the pit of his stomach. He did not like the feeling. He, Yzak Jule, was after all, not used to fear, especially when he did not know why or what he was afraid of at the moment. Perhaps it was the fear of knowing that there was something infinitely wrong with his Kari. Even worse was the fear of finding out that whatever was wrong with her would cause him losing her.

Mrs. Takano wrapped her arms around herself, shivering in a nonexistent cold breeze. "I know you have feelings for her. I know you care for her very much, but your Kari was not mine. The Kari I knew was a free spirit. She was a lover of dance and music. Of the unknown, of the exciting."

The description Mrs. Takano gave his girlfriend made Yzak shudder. Her description of Kari came nothing close to how he knew her. It was as if the woman was talking about a totally different person.

"My daughter loved thrills. She loved cats, and snow. And high places." Mrs. Takano let out a mirthless laugh and pierced Yzak with a gaze that made Yzak's spine rigid. "She loved roller coasters, boy. And she hated hotdogs…"

And it was those words that made Yzak really see the difference of his Kari and Mrs. Takano's. A memory of going to the nearest theme park flashed through Yzak's mind's eye, making him double over. And a thought so undesirable, so unthinkable, formed at the core of his brain, feeding off his fear, making his heart hurt so much he wanted to rip it out of his chest.

Everyone disappeared then. Kira, Athrun, Dearka… the girls huddled in the corner, the men. All faded as Mrs. Takano continued to talk.

"My Kari was mine, and that's all that matters. But she was too much of a lover of the exciting that I couldn't hold onto her anymore. She had obviously started liking a boy no different from you, a Coordinator. And I just couldn't have it. I tried to make her listen to me, to tell her that it was not good. But she wouldn't listen to me. She ran off with that boy to space, to Heliopolis, and I never saw her again… and I just couldn't take it. She was taken from me by a Coordinator and years after that, so was my husband, taken by the war with Coordinators."

Yzak for a moment started to shiver uncontrollably. Mrs. Takano's words fed the thought in his brain more and more too coincidental facts that he knew where the conversation was leading to even before Mrs. Takano got to the ending.

But it was not Mrs. Takano that finished her story. Out of nowhere, Kian was there, his flaming red hair and green cat-like eyes so much like those of Kari's that Yzak could not take his own eyes off him.

"The moment Kari left with the man, Mom snapped," Kian said silently. Yzak couldn't believe he was looking at the crazed lunatic whose head he had so enjoyed bashing over the summer. He looked everything but crazy now. He was speaking levelly, as opposed to how he screamed at them under the rain about his hatred for Coordinators. "A month after she was gone, Mom couldn't take it, and she spent an insane amount of money to get her daughter back. But she was gone, and there was only one way to get her back." Kian drew in a breath and let out in a whisper only loud enough to be heard in the silence. "That was to _make_ her back."

And that was the cue, the only thing Yzak needed to confirm his suspicions. It was like in slow motion that he looked over at his darling Kari lying there behind him. The words that he so feared came out of his own mouth. _"You cloned her…"_

He faintly heard gasped shocks from the girls, in the corner of his eye he saw Kira move forward and support Lacus who wobbled from her place as if to faint.

"It was the only way…" Mrs. Takano moaned.

Yzak did not have a shred of sympathy for her.

Kian, as if the torture was not enough, continued with his monologue with surprising bitterness. "But this was no ordinary clone. Unlike others, she was planted with memories of my real sister the moment she was born. Or shall we say _made_. The physical features were astonishingly perfect. But there was something wrong with the clone."

Yzak saw Kian clench and unclench his fists. It was obvious it was hurting him saying it as much as it hurt Yzak hearing about it.

"The clone – the new Kari – started to develop her own personality completely different from the original. At the clone's eleventh birthday, she pierced her ears, whereas the original hated ear piercing. By the age of thirteen she showed different interests in school. She never participated in activities she used to love. But this was not the main problem." Kian looked at his shoes, avoiding looking at his mother who had started to bite her lower lip to prevent it from jittering. "The problem was, as the clone started knowing what it was supposed to like and dislike, it started to contradict its own memories, so determined to make its own existence. And the new Kari, the clone, was a whole new different individual that what my mother remembered, so that just wasn't right." Finally Kian looked up and when he did, he gave Yzak a long, pained look. "And then she met you, and my mother couldn't take it…"

And Yzak was falling, falling in his own disbelief of the truth that just unfolded before him. For some reason, he still could not believe it even when the coincidences made everything perfectly clear. He forced himself to ask the question that came second to his fear of losing Kari. "What do you plan to do with her?"

This time, it was Mrs. Takano who answered. "Her memory of her new found existence must be erased and replaced with the personality my real daughter had. I am taking her to Higashimokoto and make sure her true purpose is restored." With this she gestured at the men in white.

And with this, all the fear, all the confusion in Yzak vanished, replaced by complete and utter anger. _"Why?"_ he roared, lashing out his hand. "Why do you have to obliterate her existence now just to contain her original self's experiences and likes and dislikes? What satisfaction does that bring you at all? It's like losing your daughter all over again!"

Mrs. Takano shook her head. "She was made to be a replacement of the daughter that _I_ knew, the daughter that _I_ loved. If I let her continue with this, I'll lose her again… to a Coordinator. I'll lose her to you."

Yzak felt his mouth drop open at the demented way she had said it, like a child afraid of losing her mommy and daddy. He did not know what else to say. The facts, his Kari's true identity, his Kari's true existence. She was a clone.

_A clone…_

And Yzak felt like he was close to hyperventilating. He did not even feel himself sinking to his knees from emotional exhaustion. He did not even mind the men in white circle around him, gently gather his unconscious Kari. He was fairly aware of the men take her out of the gym, now basked in half darkness with the sun gone. He did not even see Mrs. Takano look at him one last time and followed the men outside.

And he wanted to die then and there from the lack of knowing what to do next. He heard a rev of an engine and the sound of tires slowly wheeling away from the gym.

And Kari was lost from him, and he wanted to die.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

It was a nightmare from which none of them could wake up from. There they were, drowning in the darkness in that cursed gym, where all things seem to go wrong. Miriallia could only breathe deep and hope to slow her fast-pacing heart at what she had heard not a few moments ago. She looked around in the dark where she could only make up vague shapes of the people left in the gym. She heard someone's footsteps walk away from the group slowly, heard the footsteps grow distant. Someone had just left the gym. She heard another set of footsteps, she did not know who. The follower, too, had left the gym. She let out a shallow exhale and tried to grope around the wall for support. Her fingers brushed a conspicuous object, a switch of some sort. She flicked it slowly, and the gym erupted in dull, hazy yellow light. She blinked a couple of times to make her eyes adjust to the sudden brightness, and she saw the people around her, who shared the same deadpanned expression she felt.

Athrun was standing a distance away where she had stood when Mrs. Takano arrived. He appeared to have been frozen from where he stood, not moving a muscle, his eyes looking out of the exit of the gym. Dearka was crouched, stony-faced a few feet from her, his head bowed in a silent vigil as if trying to forget what he just heard. Kira and Lacus were huddled together, the songstress covering her mouth in disbelief and Kira, an arm around her shoulders, but his eyes were looking out the gym as Athrun was. Cagalli was looking at the MemS steadily, as if still in denial Kari was gone. Yalin and Fallon, both glued to the back wall, obviously not knowing what to do next. Miriallia saw that it was Yzak and Kian who were no longer present in the gym. Who had followed who, she did not know. She worried for Yzak, and guiltily, she also felt a bit mad at him. Why didn't he stop them from taking Kari? Did her true identity repulse him? Did it scare him?

She drew in a shaky breath, and when she let it out, it was as if it were the cue for everyone to move.

Kira shook his head disbelievingly, but his words were calm and composed. "There's no reason for us to be here anymore. We should go…" His voice faded from the lack of ideas of what to do next.

Yet everyone started to move as if in slow motion. She felt someone take her hand gently and when she looked up, she saw Dearka looking utterly, painfully tired. She let him lead her slowly across the gym to the exit where everyone walked zombie-like with them. At the foot of the stairs outside the gym, everyone paused awkwardly until finally Athrun spoke.

"I… I feel like going for a short walk. You all go on without me," the blue-black haired boy said, and, stuffing his hands in his pockets after giving his girlfriend's hand a gentle squeeze, he walked away in the darkness, away from the gym, away from the school. Cagalli looked after him, but decided wisely not to follow. She obviously knew when Athrun felt like being left alone.

Kira sighed as if he knew that that would be happening. He turned to Cagalli. "I'll walk you and Lacus back to your quarters, then. Yalin," he said with brief discomfort. He obviously hadn't said that name enough to get used to it. "Can I trust you with bringing Fallon back to the orphanage?"

Yalin, as if surprised that Kira had addressed him at all, nodded stiffly and silently led a whimpering Fallon behind him.

Miriallia looked after them, waving at the two weakly.

It was then that Dearka shifted uncomfortably beside her. The Buster pilot scratched his head uncomfortably, just as he had done back in the Archangel when his head had been itchy because of the drying blood in his hair.

"I… I guess I have to go, too…" he muttered. "Kira, can you take Milly with you along with Cagalli and Lacus?"

Kira looked at Dearka steadily, questioningly. Miriallia watched as Dearka looked at the lavender eyed Coordinator as if trying to wordlessly communicate his no-reason-whatsoever request. Finally Kira nodded and Dearka smiled a worried smile.

Miriallia watched wordlessly as Dearka gave her one lingering look and turned to walk away, just as Athrun did. She felt Kira gently herd the three of them forward and was about to comply when she felt somewhat unexplainably, unexplainably lonely. She stopped in her tracks and looked at Cagalli, Lacus and Kira.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I have to go after him." She did not wait for an answer from them and simply dashed after Dearka's disappearing figure before it got swallowed up in the darkness.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Dearka did not spin around to greet Miriallia. Inside him was unfamiliar feeling of annoyance that she didn't respect his desire to be alone at that moment. He had reasons why he did not want to be with her at that specific moment, things that would take a considerable amount of time to explain because he did not know where to begin, more so to add a conclusion if he ever did try to begin.

"The least you could do is acknowledge my presence," she said, panting as she caught up with him. She looked up at him, and he avoided her gaze.

"What is it?" he asked silently, and tried to speed up his pace. She tried to walk beside him, but when it seemed like he was too fast for her, she gave an irritated groan and pulled at his sleeve roughly.

"Will you please tell me what's going on? Does this have anything to do with what happened? Why are you avoiding me all of a sudden?" she demanded, the obvious strain of emotional exhaustion made him stop his brisk walking and look at her.

She looked back at him with confused blue eyes he could see clearly even in the dimness of the light coming from one lone lamp post in the corner of the street.

"I didn't know this was going to happen. I came to see you earlier in the orphanage when I met Kian looking for Yzak or Kari. Kian told me everything about Kari, things I didn't want to have to deal with today. When we were talking, his mother came and I knew it would be trouble for Yzak." He felt a muscle in his left cheek twitch. This was not the time to talk about it. In his dorm room, he knew something unpleasant was waiting. Why did this have to happen today when he had to face problems of his own? "But right now my mind is too full of other things for me to worry about."

She gave him a fiery look. "What _other_ things?"

Dearka then had to look away. He could not stand her glare because deep down he felt guilty for having to keep from her one tthis important thing. "You would not understand. I have to talk to my father."

Miriallia, for a brief moment, raised her eyebrows in surprise at his answer. "Your… father?"

He nodded briefly. He knew that his father had arrived in Orb to head the support team sent from the PLANTs. And he knew his father. He would have called a million times by now. "He arrived on Earth today. Didn't I tell… ?" The words froze in his mouth, suddenly realizing that, no, he had not told Miriallia about it. Come to think of it, he had not been telling her anything about _anything _at all.

She obviously had the same thoughts. Shaking her head vigorously, she pointed at him an accusing finger. "Why are you doing this? Why won't you let me inside that part of your life? I want to be a part of it, too, Dearka! How come you don't let me get even a glimpse of what's going on in your side of the family?"

And that was it. Dearka, also emotionally spent, answered with a coldness he did not even intend. "That part of my life is nothing, _nothing_ you can understand. Even if you try with every bit of effort you have in your ever so limited experience, you can never comprehend what I feel about that part of my life."

Miriallia gasped as if she had been slapped in the face. And tired and so drained as it is, Dearka did not bother to comfort her. He started to walk away from her again, but she followed still.

"How could I even try to understand if you won't give me a chance to? What are you so afraid to tell me about your father that I can't take? Will he hate me? Because I'm a Natural? Will he be mean to me?" When he ignored her and continued to walk, she grabbed at his arm again. "Tell me! Give me the best reason you've got!"

Dearka was shaking inwardly by now. He could hardly even feel her weighing down on his arm. He bit his lower lip, once again stopped walking, and stared at her straight in the eye. "You really want to know? You want to know what I want to keep from you? Fine!"

It did not have to be this way, he knew… He had known it from his father's emails, from scraps of notes his father would have considered as letters, from the look Captain Murrue Ramius had given him that one time she had come to visit. He had hoped he could save whatever heartbreak Miriallia might have from her, but it annoyed him that she could not understand without proof of his fear.

His roughness at grabbing her hand surprised both of them. He nearly dragged her all the way to the library. He could not believe he was doing this. He could get court-martialed　in the PLANTs for this. But he did not want Miriallia to think this was as simple as that.

"Will you – It hurts! Let go!" she cried as she pulled her arm free from his death grip once they were inside the deserted library. Aside from them, no other living soul was there. The silence was deafening. Dearka could hear his heart pounding in his head.

Once again he grabbed her by the shoulders and, sitting her on the nearest computer, he flicked the power on. Typing his email address with shaking fingers, he left the keyboard for her disposal.

He smiled mirthlessly at the only items in his inbox. There were only five items in it, no subjects were bothered to typed in. It mattered little.

Miriallia, unsure of what he wanted to show her, looked at the screen uncertainly.

"Go on," he commanded. "You want to find out about _this_ part of my life? You want to be a _part_ of it? Fine. You can start from the bottom of it."

Miriallia obeyed. Gingerly, her hands led the mouse and clicked on the first of the five emails. A short text file opened. It was just a paragraph short, it did not take her long to finish reading it.

"Do you know what that is?" he asked tauntingly.

She swallowed before answering. "Request for Discharge papers…"

"That's right. A request for _my_ discharge for abandoning my post in the battle, and a second count as traitor when I sided with the Archangel in the war. Signed by Athrun's father when he was alive. Do you know who co-signed it? It's all there in black and white."

Her answer was no louder than a whisper. "Tad Elthman."

"Tad Elthman, that's right. My old man," he said, then urged her on. "Now on to the next. Go on. Don't be shy. It's not a long email."

He was not lying. When Miriallia did as she was told, she stared at the monitor before swallowing a sigh. It was just one sentence typed by his father personally.

"_**You disappoint me.**_

Miriallia shivered unconsciously as she looked up at Dearka.

He gestured at the screen. "There's more. Go on. Have a look into the part of my life you so badly want to find out."

She did so unwillingly. The third email was no longer than the first. Two paragraphs.

"How about this, Milly? Do you know what _this_ is?"

She licked her lips before taking her time to answer. "An appeal… signed by Ezaria Jule to reconsider your discharge…"

"Good girl. And as you can see down there, there are other signatures of those who were in favor of the dismissal of the discharge. And as you can see, Tad Elthman isn't one of them."

Miriallia's eyes scanned the names before speaking. "Ezaria Jule wanted you to stay in ZAFT?"

"Probably Yzak's influence. He didn't want me to get sacked. But that's not our problem. Go on, Milly. There's more."

The fourth email was from his father again, personally sent. But no self-typed words were included. A simple attachment. Dearka did not have to look at what it said without looking at it.

"Your demotion…" Miriallia breathed.

"Better than getting sacked, right?" he answered bitterly.

Without hesitation, Miriallia clicked on the next email. It was once again from his father, but unlike the rest, this was not a short one. Actually, it was more than Dearka had expected from his father. They did not exactly have the greatest of communication skills when it came to each other.

The letter was mainly composed of updates about the PLANTs. Some had to do with Yzak's promotion. But judging from Miriallia's silence, she did not appear to care about those except for the last paragraph of the letter.

_**You should be grateful you were only demoted. **_

_**It, of course, had nothing to do with me.**_

_**You have your friend, young Yzak Jule to thank, I suppose.**_

_**When you get back to the PLANTs you will be under**_

_**Representative Yzak Jule's wing. I assume be is well?**_

_**It does not matter. I will be going to Earth myself**_

_**In hopes to reach a hand to Orb Union. We will talk in the shuttle **_

_**On the way home to the PLANTs. I expect you have packed your belongings.**_

_**I would not want to be kept waiting.**_

_**0--0--0--0**_

**_Dear, dear readers and friends! How long has it been since Yuugiri had succumbed into an ever so long hibernation? I wish to apologize for the long wait. Though I expect most of you to have forgotten about me and my story, I cannot blame you. I_ will _not blame you. I have no excuses except that my life has become so completely taken by work and sleep (and because I had resigned from my previous work and had moved house because of it, no internet connection…) Please forgive me._ **

_**Disclaimer: I do not know how Dearka meant to his father. I have no idea whatsoever if they were ever close. But for the sake of this story, please do not sue me if ever they really were close… **_


	41. Phase 41: When Kisses Start to Hurt

_**After my so-called death and resurrection in FF, I could not help but feel kind of sad after realizing that this is (gasp!) the 41**__**st**__** chapter of TIH. I can't believe we made it this far, my friends! But now, comes the climax of the story, at long last! Secrets revealed and connections will finally unfold in this chapter that took me a while to think about how to put everything together. In reality, I too have forgotten some crucial parts in the story that I had to reread some of the chapters to avoid inconsistencies. Found all too many of those, and so entirely gave up to the decision of rewriting some of the chapters when I finally finish Chapter 45. **_

_**But anyway, enough of the chitchat and lets get on with the next chapter**__**！ **_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed.**_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

He felt as if he was entering a nightmare he knew he could not wake up from. As if in a daze, he found himself walking zombie-like in the darkness of the soccer field, totally unaware of where he should go. It was not everyday that someone would announce that the love of your life was a clone. This was one thing not even heavy training up in the PLANTs could have prepared his heart for.

And the last thing he needed was to be stalked.

Yzak knew Kian was following him. He did not, however, have any energy left to tell him off. Instead, he tried to will him away with his thoughts, but he just would not disappear.

"Why didn't you do anything to stop them?" Kian finally asked. His voice was low, but Yzak could distinguish the accusation in his words.

Yzak tried to ignore him. He tried to get his mind into other things worth thinking, but there weren't any other things more worthy than Kari. He dashed at his eyes annoyingly, afraid that he was crying, because right now it was what he felt like doing. Luckily, his body did not betray him like his heart did.

"You claim that you care for her, but you let her be shipped off to get her memory erased?" Kian hissed, still walking a few feet away from him. "Do you think that after this, she would remember you? When she gets out of Higashimokoto, she will be a whole new different person, Yzak. Everything about her will change."

The last words Kian threw at him echoed in his brain like a gong. Kian did not have to tell him this terrible, terrible fact. His Kari was no longer going be the same. Whatever they have shared together would be wiped from her thoughts. Her very personality was not going to be the same. Kian did not have to tell him this. But the saddest of all facts was that he could not do anything to save her memory of him, of them. It was over. He should have written it off the moment he first met her. She was no Natural. She was no Coordinator.

Yzak stopped dead in his tracks when he suddenly found Kian standing in front of him, those green eyes half glowing in the dimness of the dimmest light. Those eyes, so much like Kari's, penetrated his blue ones with so much emotion that he had to look away.

"Look at me," Kian demanded. "Look at me straight in the eye and tell me that you're going to turn a blind eye on this."

Yzak slowly raised his eyes to meet his gaze, and for the first time, amid the uncertainty, bubbled anger. "Do you think there's anything I could do about this even if I wanted to? Do you think I'd have the power to whisk her off and take her away somewhere as if in a story? How could I? She's not human, Kian. She's _property_. A very expensive property that isn't mine. She was made to be someone's very expensive companion, someone to fill the space."

Kian spat on the ground. "You make her sound like a puppy."

And with that Yzak paused. He had not realized how completely low he had spoken of Kari, and he felt a bit disgusted with himself for having betrayed her thoughts like that. He shook his head. "What do you want me to do? Save her? Then what? What would you have me do after, let's say, I take her back?"

Kian frowned. "Take her away from here. Get her away from my mother."

"And why, all of a sudden are you teaming with me? The last time I checked, you hated my guts and that I should stay away from your sister."

"Because I've learned that it was my mother who drove my sister away. I always thought it was your kind…" Kian's eyes narrowed. "Even I think my mother has gone too far…"

Yzak brushed the statement away. He did not want to think about it. He did not like thinking about things he did not understand. "Leave me alone…"

"What about Kari?"

"It's no long my business."

And then it happened in a flash. A blur of red, two heavy strides and a freight train hit the side of Yzak's head, making him stumble back and fall on his behind. Kian had punched him.

"You good for nothing ass hole!" Kian screamed, whipping his foot hard while Yzak was unaware. It hit him across the ribs, throwing him backwards. "You made me see you as this all right guy who would take care of my sister, making me believe you were gonna make it all right this time!" He grabbed Yzak by the collar, pulled him up so that his face was about an inch way from his. "You make me sick."

Yzak winced at the screaming pain at his side. He did not believe he deserved this beating, and in no way did he believe he should be taking it from this person. In return, he grabbed Kian's collar and shoved him away. "Touch me again, and I'll kill you."

Kian struck him across the face with the back of his hand. "You came all the way to Higashimokoto just to see me then, asking things about my sister and what was wrong with her. I thought you were all right! I thought that you and I could actually get along after that. When I got out of the Institute I came looking for you as soon as I could, try to tell you about Kari! I thought with your help, everything was going to be all right! Now, tell me, you son of a bitch! Was all that just an act?"

Yzak glared at him with so much hatred he felt the loss of Kari fade out in the background. He rammed a fist into Kian's mouth. "Don't you call my mother a bitch!"

Kian stumbled a few feet backwards, but retaliated with one full swing, hitting Yzak in the stomach. "Kari is out there, not knowing at all that tomorrow, the moment she wakes up, she wouldn't even know you're alive! You're going to let my mother get away with destroying what my sister worked so hard for. Trying to do it over again! That's why she left us! But you won't understand that reason, right?"

Yzak recoiled and fell on his knees at the blow Kian made at his stomach. He coughed a bit, wiped his mouth, and stared at Kian for a full minute before speaking. "Then tell the damn reason why she did leave, dammit."

Kian, his icy features, seemed to have melted a degree. He straightened, still panting from the effort of beating Yzak into submission. He wiped at his mouth, wincing when he saw blood smeared his hand. He spat at the ground, then turned his back away from Yzak. "She was three months pregnant when she left us. She never told my mother, but she told me. And because she didn't want to break my mother's heart, she left, afraid of what my mother would do. She was never taken… She left on her own choice. But can you blame her?"

Yzak felt the confession seep into his brain. In his mind's eye, he saw a vision of Kari touching his face, tracing the scar on his forehead. Saw her intertwining her fingers with his. Saw her playing with the hairs on his arm. He saw her kissing him while he was unaware, lying down next to him under a blanket of stars. Eating cotton candy

The thoughts were so painful he felt his heart once again give an involuntary twitch. He could not breathe. It was all too much to handle.

But Kian did not stop the torture. "When I was in Higashimokoto, I didn't stop moving. I researched. I asked around. I dug even into my mother's own papers. And I found what I was looking for." He squatted right in front of Yzak, eyes piercing the down Duel pilot with so much intensity that Yzak could not help but look back. Kian was going to reveal something to him…

But what… ?

"I've found my sister's lover's name…" Kian said, barely above a whisper.　Yzak felt the red-haired boy inch his face closer to his, as if to make sure Yzak did not miss anything he had to say. He, however did not say much. But the three words that came out of his mouth made Yzak's blood run cold.

_"Neil Josef Bryaritt."_

Yzak felt his breath get caught in his throat, the last word Kian said echoing through his brain like a gong.

_Bryaritt…. Bryaritt… _

"Oh, God… " Yzak hissed silently as the energy drained from his body completely. "Are you telling me that Fallon… is Kari's daughter?"

Kian maintained a livid face. He nodded.

"No… that can't be… but that must mean that I…"

_That I killed the real Kari… ?_

That was the most unbelievable parody of his sorry excuse for a life.

But his thoughts were interrupted by a revving engine, a squeal of tires and Yzak looked up to see a small red sedan clumsily parked a few hundred feet from him, headlights making his eyes wince from the abrupt brightness. In the driver's seat was none other than Athrun Zala, an unreadable expression in his deep eyes, a grim smile on his set mouth.

"Get in," Athrun ordered.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

No one talked for about ten minutes while Yzak and Kian boarded the red sedan rent-a-car Athrun had gotten the moment he had broken away from the group. It was so much like the Yzak that he knew to simply give up on the matter regarding probably the most wonderful thing to happen in his life. But the Justice pilot was not about to sit around and watch him make the biggest mistake he could ever create. Athrun knew how it hurts to feel regret. He knew how it would drive you crazy because of it. And Athrun knew how crazy Yzak was when his emotions got the best of him. It will not do the next PLANT chairman to be a nutcase. And for all that it's worth, given they were not too late, Athrun was going to make Yzak save Kari if he had to drag him by the hair.

Athrun glanced at Yzak sitting in the passenger seat for a second before returning his eyes back on the road. "You look like something ran you over. And is that blood dripping from your lower lip?"

Yzak, however did not look as if he heard him. It was either that, or he was intent on ignoring him. The Duel pilot had a strange far away look in his blue eyes that Athrun had to admit look quite scary. It was as if Yzak looked… scared…?

Athrun looked at the rearview mirror and saw Kian looking out the window with a deadpanned expression in his cold features. Athrun did not know why he had wanted to come. He wondered whatever happened between this boy and Yzak. He did not even know if it had anything to do with Kari. It mattered little. Right now, they had to get Kari back. For Yzak's sake… Or at least for his sanity's sake.

Entering the highway, the Justice pilot did not actually have a plan about what to do when they finally get to the Institute. Which was a bad thing. If worse came to worst, they would have to fight their way in, but then there were chances they could get arrested. And that was the last thing he wanted. Trying to shuffle things in his head, he wondered if Yzak was thinking of some sort of plan to get back his girlfriend from her crazy mother.

And it was then that Yzak spoke.

"I don't see the sense in this. I can't stop her mother from doing what she wants. I have no say in this," he said grudgingly, as if the words that passed his lips made no more meaning to him as it did to Athrun.

"And why is that?" Athrun asked, somehow being a bit more annoyed at Yzak's obvious resignation.

"Because she isn't mine. I have no claim on property."

Athrun raised an eyebrow, steering the car off the highway, recklessly overtaking a truck, which honked at him noisily. "I never considered you to be a fast quitter before. You were usually move persevering to the point of stubbornness."

Yzak then hid his face from Athrun, looking out the window, not saying anything. And it was then that Athrun felt that for the first time since he had known Yzak, the Duel pilot was actually – hard it is to believe – very, very emotionally spent.

"So, you are telling me you will give up on Kari, and let her lose her individuality because her mother said so?"

It took a while before Yzak responded. "I have no choice. What would you have wanted me to do?"

And with that Athrun was stumped. What _had_ he wanted him to do? Not knowing what else to say, for he really did not have encouraging words to tell him, he decided to be a bit more realistic with his answer. "The only thing you could do right now, is at least say goodbye to her properly. The least you could do to her memory is be a part of it."

Yzak wiped at his eyes roughly, and Athrun was almost afraid that if he looked, he would be seeing Yzak crying. Athrun decided to save the boy some of his pride and not look at him. He really did not know what else to say.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Yzak felt numb inside and out as he stared at the familiar brick building sitting in front of him like a mourning monster. He had been to this Institution only once before, but he could not remember it looking this menacing. In the darkness of dusk, he felt a fear he had never felt before; a dread that he didn't even experience while fighting for his life back in the war. It was the feeling of complete and utter helplessness, the feeling of coming across a brick wall and not having anything else to do but turn back.

He looked at Athrun who had just disembarked the car and was looking up at the building forlornly. The Justice pilot killed the engine. Yzak wished he didn't. The silence was too deafening for him.

"I can guide you through the building," Kian suddenly said. Yzak had almost forgotten the boy had come along.

Yzak never took his eyes off the front door. For some weird reason, he felt like running through it, and at the same time running away. What Kian had revealed him made him sick. The mystery was all coming into place. And he felt totally unclean after the revelation. The coincidences were too obvious. Fallon, Kari… So that was why whenever he had tapped into Kari's thoughts back in space, he would always see himself blasting the escape shuttle before falling into Earth's orbit. He had the real Kari's blood in his own hands… It was too crazy to ponder on. The more he thought of it, the more he hated himself.

And he remembered the moments he had with Kari, and felt a sudden rush of sadness, a feeling all too foreign to him as well. He wanted to go and find her, apologize for a lot of things to her even when he knew she would not understand what he would be talking about. Apologize for not treating her better, apologize for the too short time they've had. Apologize for not being able to do anything.

_But it wouldn't matter if I did. She wouldn't remember about it the next day…_

The next thing Yzak knew was that he was being herded into the building by Athrun and Kian, the red haired boy leading the way through a labyrinth of empty corridors, dimly lit rooms and spacious lobbies until they finally stopped abruptly in front of a large, conspicuous door with a sign above it that read _Therapy Laboratory_.

"What… what is this place?" Athrun asked, his voice shaking a bit as he read the sign nervously.

But before Kian could explain, Yzak opened his mouth to speak. "Children from all over the world who have been traumatized by the war are brought here for treatment. I remember Kari mentioning it to me, the reason why she had invented the Memory Simulators in the first place was to contradict the sessions they hold here."

Athrun hissed disapprovingly. "And what sessions actually take place here?"

Yzak lowered his head. "The traumatized children who undergo therapy here come out happy and completely cured from depression because they could not remember the reason why they were sad in the first place."

Athrun then could no longer tear his eyes from the door as if it were the most evil thing in the world. "They brainwash them…"

Yzak nodded. "Exactly."

"And Kari is in there?" Athrun asked.

"Yes," someone suddenly spoke from behind them, and the three boys whirled around, startled.

There, standing right behind them, was none other than Mrs. Takano, her expression that of a child who had lost her favorite toy.

"Where is she?" Yzak demanded. And it took all his will power not to run the lady over.

Mrs. Takano looked at him with steady eyes. "I didn't know you'd actually follow us here." For a brief moment, her gaze softened. "You must really love her a lot."

Yzak felt a growl bubble up his throat. "I want to see her. Show her to me now."

The lady tilted her head to the right, and for a split second, Yzak actually thought he could see where Kari had gotten the mannerism. Those green eyes so much like her daughter's, Mrs. Takano spoke silently, "I will let you see her one last time, but I'm afraid I won't change my mind about what I am going to do."

Yzak felt a surge of excitement at the possibility of being able to see Kari again. He had not actually been away from her for more than two hours, yet he felt a strange longing of being close to her. He did not even want to argue with Mrs. Takano about what was going to happen afterwards. All that mattered was that he would see her. And that would be enough for the meantime.

"Where is she?"

Mrs. Takano then started a leisurely walk past him, opened the door that led to the Therapy Lab, and looked back at them with deadpanned eyes. "Right this way."

Yzak hesitated for a mere second before he found himself walking slowly as if in a trance through the door that led into a broad, brightly lit room, with men in white silently fiddling with computers at one corner of the ironically claustrophobic setting. Some of the men had looked up the moment the three boys came in, but Mrs. Takano raised a hand as if to tell them everything was okay.

Yzak felt the hairs at the back of his neck stand on end as he looked around him. Machines that looked pretty much like Kari's Memory Simulators were lined against the wall to his left, some of them were actually occupied; people, children and adults alike, were strapped to the contraptions, those bulky headgears covering their eyes heavily. Yzak forced himself to look away, look straight ahead where Mrs. Takano was leading them. It was then did they finally come to another door, much smaller than the first. This door, however did not open as easily as the first door did. Mrs. Takano flipped a small panel at wall, revealing a number pad, where she swiftly inputted a series of combinations, making the device light up before the door finally swung open.

And at that moment, everything around Yzak disappeared as the vision that he beheld behind the door was none other than Kari, standing there with her head bent low, chin on her chest, beautiful strawberry blond hair covering half of her face. And it was then did Yzak lose all control. He felt his feet move on their own, starting slowly then speeding into a run towards her. His footsteps brought her to raise her head, but was not able to utter anything as Yzak had immediately engulfed her into a stifling embrace, nearly knocking her off her feet.

The Duel Pilot did not know what to say. His throat was so choked up with unfamiliar emotions that he could not even utter her name. Just feeling her body next to him made the emotions even stronger, because now that he had her in his arms again, what was he supposed to do when he knew he could not win…?

"Yzak…" she murmured as she returned his embrace, her lithe arms wrapping around his waist so gently that he could hardly feel her. "I'm glad you came…"

Yzak pushed her at arm's length then, blue eyes searching green eyes, making sure she was okay, that she was still the same Kari he had fallen in love with. He was rewarded with a weak smile he could not even return.

"Kari, you don't have to do this," he said hoarsely. "Do you know what will happen to you here? Let's get out of here. I can take you back to the PLANTs with me. Everything will be all right, so long as we can get out of here…"

He knew he was starting to ramble thoughtlessly. It was the first time in his life that he had felt this helpless… Kari as usual, gave him her understanding smile, a small shake of her head, and rested her forehead on his chest. "I'm not going anywhere, Yzak. I'm sorry. I can't…"

"Why not?" he demanded softly, still aware that Mrs. Takano was only a few hundred feet away. He could feel her watching him with eyes that of a hawk. He tried to ignore her as he turned back to Kari. "If you stay here, you will lose everything you've worked hard for. Do you know what's going to happen?"

Kari was silent for a while, before she finally raised her eyes to meet him, her embrace suddenly tightening as if in anxiety. She nodded. "I know everything. My mother explained to me what she is going to do…"

Yzak felt his whole body shake. He could not ponder why Kari would choose to stay here when she knew that her memory was going to be erased, that she was going to be a whole new person when she wakes up tomorrow. He crushed her to him possessively. "I don't want to lose you…"

His words seem to surprise her as much as it surprised him. He had never depended on anything or anyone at all except for Kari… He should have written it off the moment they had met. He had let his guard down. He had gone completely soft and helpless without her that it hurt to know that she would be gone from him forever…

Kari cuddled against him, as if savoring his very presence. "I don't care if I get my memories erased. I don't care if I wake up as a whole new different person tomorrow. I'm not worried."

Yzak closed his eyes tightly, willing the tears that were threatening to fall to go away. "I am. What about us, Kari? What's going to happen to us?"

And with that, Kari pulled away from him, and it was her turn to hold him at arm's length, those penetrating eyes searching his face as a smile played on her lips. "Because even if I do forget about who I am, even if I get my memories erased, I have no doubt that I will just fall in love with you all over again… " And with this she kissed him lightly, briefly on the lips.

But even with these comforting words, why did it feel like she was saying goodbye?

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

_**Author's Note: This Chapter is dedicated to Tina**_


	42. Phase 42: Moving On

_**An update?? Really??**_

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Two weeks have passed. After the encounter in Higashimokoto, no one had dared say anything about it to Yzak. Everyone had tried to avoid the subject, and perhaps that was the cause why everyone had actually started – after much avoidance – getting on with their lives.

Cagalli had made it an everyday habit to call Kisaka hours at a time to check on things going on in Orb, and Athrun had made discreet searches for apartments in the said country, as if already decided on staying on Earth permanently.

Those two were not the only ones keeping close ties to Orb. Miriallia, whose family lives there, had been keeping close contact, and more than once did the talk of moving back come up in the conversation. Ironically, Dearka, had been away from Japan for the last two days and was presently in Orb to meet Tad Elthman, his father, who had flown down to Earth to spearhead the Orb relocations.

Kira, too, had been much preoccupied with Lacus' decision on staying with him on Earth. His parents were more than thrilled and had insisted letting her stay with them, but Lacus simply refused politely and told them she would get quarters for herself. Mr. and Mrs. Yamoto would not have it. The matter still was unresolved and Kira was content at letting it stay that way for the time being.

But all this hubbub concerned Yzak little. He had been keeping to his room majority of the days, and surprisingly, no one had tried to force him out of it. Of course, he did not know what else to do but sulk in his misery at the discovery revealed to him in Higashimokoto and in the gym. The shock was too much for him. He did not even know how to handle the fact that _he_, of all people had ended the life of Kari – the real Kari – mother of two, wife to a Coordinator… The horrible fact left a bad taste in his mouth, but nothing could have been more bitter than the fact that Kari – _his_ Kari – no longer belonged to him.

Of course, he had seen her in school over the weeks, walking to her locker in between classes, lugging around books and her laptop like she used to. The three silver studs on each ear were gone, and her stack of M and M's were no longer with her. He would always watch her glide her way through the halls, fighting the urge to run to her and hug her. She would not remember him, and he did not trust himself to strike up a conversation with the girl he was in love with, when he knew she did not even know he existed.

Once or twice, she had accidentally bumped into him between classes, and she would murmur an incoherent apology to him and be on her way, but gone were her piercing gazes, the calculating looks in her eyes. He was nothing to her now…

And that fact hurt him more than anything that had ever hurt him in this lifetime.

One time, as he had watched her sipping from a can of orange juice as she sat on the grass in the soccer field alone, he had actually felt angry with her. Why did she allow her mother to erase their memories? Did he not mean anything to her at all to at least fight for them? He had offered her security up in the PLANTs and she had refused… Why?

_Why?_

The answer came to him in the form of a letter.

He was busy stuffing his important documents into his traveling bag when someone knocked on his door for the first time in two weeks. Kira's placid face was behind his door.

"What do you want?" Yzak snapped at him.

Kira's expression did not change at his sharp tone. "Someone's here to see you."

Yzak was taken aback by Kira's announcement. And for a brief moment he actually felt hopeful. Could it be Kari?

Kira, as if he saw a glimmer of hope in Yzak's eyes, hesitantly shook his head and said, "It's Kian. He said he wanted to talk to you."

Yzak stared at the Freedom pilot for a few seconds too long, then nodded. "Fine."

He then proceeded out of his quarters to meet Kian at their dorm entrance, where he stood awkwardly, his hands stuffed inside his pockets, an unreadable expression on his deadpanned face.

For an eternity, they just stood there, staring at each other, until Kian handed him a crumpled letter envelope out of his left pocket.

"This… is for you," was what he muttered to Yzak, not nearly meeting his eyes.

Yzak stared at the letter uncertainly. He did not have energy left to ask him what it was, who it was from. It mattered little, the sender. Nothing else mattered now. He snapped the letter out of his hand and proceeded to returning to his room.

"It's from her," he said, making Yzak suddenly stop in mid stride.

He felt anger bubble up in his stomach. He did not have the time or the stamina to play games. "I don't know what you're talking about…"

"Before her… session… she asked me to give that to you."

Yzak stared at the letter in his hands, which he discovered were shaking uncontrollably. He had to take extra control not to rip the envelope into shreds…

Not looking back, he proceeded to his rooms and slammed the door behind him. It did not take long for his knees to fail him, and he fell kneeling on the carpeted floor, hugging the letter to his heart like a fool.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Miriallia hugged her knees to her as she looked out the window of Lacus' room as she sat on her friend's bed. The Songstress was sitting on her writing desk, reading a book, but Miriallia had observed she had been reading the same page for the last hour. Miriallia did not mind. Almost everyone had been out of it for the last couple of weeks.

She looked up when Cagalli entered the room, a disheveled expression on her almost always troubled face.

"I've sent them," she said in a monotone voice as she plopped down on the bed beside Miriallia.

Lacus looked up from her book. "Huh?"

Cagalli rubbed her temple tiredly. "Our dropping forms."

Miriallia felt her brow furrow. She had almost forgotten that they had all agreed to finally move on with their lives. She sighed and looked out the window once more. She wondered if Dearka was doing all right in Orb, shuddered at the thought. Her boyfriend was off to meet with his strict father. Parts of her worried for him. She hoped Mr. Tad Elthman wouldn't be too strict with Dearka.

But what worried her more was the fact that he was coming home, ironically. It made her anxious of the news he could be bringing to her, about what was to become of him, of them. There were too many things clouding their future, and she could not even imagine what was to be expected in the coming days before her, but of all the things she was dreading, it was today, most especially.

Dearka was coming home _today_.

For the past weeks he had been away, he had only called Miriallia twice; once, to tell her that he had arrived safely in Orb, and another time yesterday to tell her that he was returning to Hokkaido today.

Miriallia had not asked him how he was. She already knew by the sound of his voice that he was dead tired. She had offered to fetch him at the airport, but he had adamantly declined, and told her he would meet her in Abashiri when he gets back. The phone calls were brief, and all the while Miriallia dreaded to ask what was going on, if he was all right, afraid that he would put her off. So in turn she had kept it brief herself.

Only now, she did not know what to expect.

She found herself watching the second hand of the clock tick its way across the numbers, and it was only then did she realize that Dearka was about to arrive in less than five minutes, if he did not encounter anything to delay his schedule.

She found out that nothing did delay his schedule when someone knocked on the door of their room. She was immediately up on her feet and was at the door in a couple of strides. She was taken aback when it was not only Dearka standing by the door, waiting for it to open.

There, looming right behind her boyfriend, stood a slender woman with dark brown hair that reached down to her waist, bangs cut straight across her forehead. Tilted lavender eyes coolly stared back at Miriallia as if wondering who she was.

Miriallia, in return, looked at her, wondering the same thing. It was Dearka who made the introductions.

He cleared his throat first before answering. "This is Shiho Hahnenfuss."

Cagalli and Lacus were instantly behind her. The princess of Orb merely looked, and the Songstress' lips were a tight line as if in recognition.

Miriallia blinked. The girl named Shiho nodded in acknowledgement, but did not say anything.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

An hour after Kian had dropped by, the loud crash that came from Athrun's room got Kira running from the kitchen. The sight that beheld him when he barged through the Justice pilot's door made him stop in mid-stride. Athrun was sitting in the middle of the floor, several small boxes cluttered the space beneath the high shelf by his desk. The mess was nothing compared to the rest of the room. The bed was nowhere recognizable with pile upon pile of clothes and more odds and ends Kira could not identify.

"I heard a loud sound…" Kira said, letting his arms drop to his sides.

Athrun looked over his shoulder to him and smiled wearily. "Call it frustration. I was trying to pack."

Kira blinked. It was then did he realize that sitting with Athrun on the floor was a large traveling bag half full of clothes.

"Maybe you could do it a bit more quietly?"

Athrun gave him a skeptical look.

Kira shrugged. "We don't want Yzak grumbling about anything about us. He looks pretty pissed as it is." Sighing, he sat down on the floor across Athrun. "Kian just dropped by and handed something to Yzak. He didn't look too happy about it."

Athrun nodded his head absently, tossed a pair of socks into the bag in front of him. "I could understand."

"I wasn't there when… when it all happened. It must have been really hard."

"I wouldn't even know. Yzak never told me what he and Kari talked about, how she came to the decision of undergoing that session. But one thing's for sure, it crushed the hell out of him."

Kira felt himself grimace at the memory of what happened to Kari, of the discovery Yzak had about her, and of her real self. The coincidence of the Duel pilot having been the one responsible for the death of the original Kari was too creepy to put into words, so he decided to change the subject. Gesturing at the cluttered room, he laughed weakly. "It seems I'm not the only one getting things organized here."

Athrun also laughed a hollow laugh as his eyes wandered to his bed. "I tried to look for an apartment in Orb."

"Did you find one?"

"Nope. Apparently, it's close to impossible to find lodging at this time, what with the relocations being on top priority. Cagalli offered her influence, but I had to decline."

Kira watched his friend a few moments, and he was suddenly filled with memories of their past, back when everything was so uncomplicated. Back when they didn't have to think about anything remotely disturbing as cutting classes, or pulling a prank on someone they didn't like. "You could stay with me for a while. Until you find a place to stay, that is."

Athrun looked back at him with an uncertain light in his eyes. And instantly, it reminded Kira of the misunderstandings they have had over the last month. About Lacus. About Cagalli. Those problems were resolved with an unspoken agreement to forgive and forget. But come to think of it, he had not been alone with Athrun since forever, and the realization of that fact suddenly made him self-conscious.

It was then did Kira decide they had to talk.

Letting his eyes fall onto the carpeted floor, pretending to be really interested on a dark stain on it, Kira cleared his throat. "I never got to ask how you were. You know, after leaving Copernicus…"

Athrun's uncertainty immediately turned into surprise. Kira could understand. He supposed it was too late to ask something that had happened at least three years ago. But come to think of it, after Athrun was called back by his father, and Kira and his parents had relocated to Heliopolis, they had no communication at all. It was only after a couple of years when their next meeting had to be one of the worst reunions ever. It was when Athrun and his team had invaded Heliopolis then. And they were both so occupied with the war, that ironically they never got the chance to ask each other how things had gone.

Athrun shrugged again, leaning back on his arm casually as he could muster. "The usual. Tried to make the best out of everything I had then. But then the Bloody Valentine happened… and my priorities changed."

Kira winced. This was something they had never talked about before. "I'm sorry about your mother."

"Don't be. It's not like it was your fault or anything." His friend then started to busy himself with digging through the clothes in his bag. "Things were pretty rough then. I'm just glad that it's all over."

This made Kira grin. Getting up on his feet, he patted Athrun on the back, deciding to end the discussion. There would be more time for them to talk, when they finally get on with their lives. "All over? Actually, I think it's all just beginning."

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Yzak pulled the curtains open and squinted at the brightness of outside. The weather was wonderful, as if it were mocking him. He had had his curtains drawn the past weeks, but it felt like years since he had looked outside. Pushing the window open, he leaned on the railing and pulled out the letter Kian had handed him, his hands shaking. The envelope was plain, nothing special written on it, but Yzak studied it for the longest period of time. After what seemed like a century, he ripped the envelope open and pulled out a small slip of paper, unfolded it and began to read while listening to the pounding of his heart in his chest.

The letter was not long, but he had to read it five times to understand it, decipher it, make sure there wasn't anything he was missing.

The letter went like this:

_Dear Yzak,_

_You are hurting, and it is my fault. I will not ask you to forgive me, because I know that my decision was my selfish desire to forget about who I am. I don't think I can live with the knowledge that I am who I am, and so I've decided to forget. It took me a long time to weigh the pros and cons about my decision, if forgetting you, us, would be enough a sacrifice to get rid of the fact that I was made and not born. I'm selfish, I'm sorry. _

_After all… I am only human._

_But what we had, what could have been, had made it so very hard for me to come up to this decision. I love you, Yzak. Thank you so much for being you. This will be the last thing I do before I forget everything. So if I could have just one request; forget about me, too._

_Kari_

There were no hidden words in what she wrote. And that was what pained Yzak more. She had asked him to forget about her, and he felt angry because it was easier said than done. Goddamn her! Does she know how hard it is to forget about the only thing he had ever felt happy about?

Fighting the urge to scream, he crumpled the piece of paper in his hand and was about to throw it away when he noticed two people standing beneath his window. Momentarily distracted, he narrowed his eyes and frowned when he saw Dearka looking up at him with an unreadable expression on his tan face, beside him stood a girl with long brown hair. Yzak's blue eyes met the girl's purple ones, and Yzak's frown deepened.

He backed away from the window, and slammed it shut. He did not know why, but Shiho Hahnenfuss was standing with Dearka outside his window.


	43. Phase 43: Changes

_**Ohhh, and update! I can't believe my pet project is almost over! **_

_**0--0--0--0**_

Lacus woke up the next day feeling totally empty inside. There were no more weird, unforgettable dreams this time, dreams she had had for the last week, but for some unexplainable reason, today was different. For one thing, it was cold. Pushing away the blankets and stumbling out of bed, avoiding stepping on the unpacked clothes that had accumulated within their stay in Hokkaido, she proceeded to the kitchen, where she saw Cagalli sitting on the dining table. The princess of Orb had a mug of coffee in front of her, a newspaper on her lap.

"Good morning," Cagalli greeted without looking up from the page she was reading.

"Good morning," Lacus answered. It was unnatural for Cagalli to be up this early, especially reading a newspaper. It was usually Miriallia who would be up, drinking teao or making breakfast, but the girl was nowhere to be seen.

As if sensing her thoughts, Cagalli turned the pages of the newspaper and said, "Dearka picked her up at around seven. I suppose she won't be back until late."

Lacus licked her dry lips with a dry tongue. She knew that those two have a lot to talk about, and guessed Cagalli was right about Miriallia probably being out all day. Sitting herself on the table across Cagalli, she sighed. After what happened to Yzak and Kari, it was hard to be positive. Even the princess looked like she had matured overnight.

"How's everything in Orb?" Lacus asked, in desperate need for conversation.

"Everything is doing great, actually. The relocations are going a bit slow, but sure. And thanks to the PLANTs and other sponsor nations, funds never come short." Cagalli looked at her over the pages of the newspaper. "Don't worry. By the time we go back, everything will be settled."

After a few moments of silence, Lacus finally nodded, if a bit uncertainly.

Cagalli's eyes never left her. "You look troubled."

Was it that obvious? Involuntarily, she shivered. It must be the cold, though she doubted it. "It's just that I look back at the times we've spent here, and I've realized that it was over even before it ever began. I just didn't notice it early enough."

Cagalli smiled in understanding first before putting down the newspaper, though Lacus saw she was gripping it harder than necessary. "You make it sound like it's all over."

Lacus unconsciously traced lazy circles on the table. "Isn't it? Cagalli, after this, things will never be the same again. You _do_ know that, don't you?"

Cagalli did not reply. She looked down at Lacus' hands as she traced those circles. Lacus studied her face intently. Memories of fighting by her side cascaded down her head like a waterfall. She could see the tired lines of stress marking her young face, and sighed.

"How long has it been, Lacus, when I told you that leading a battleship suits you?" Cagalli asked, a small smile pulling the corner of her lips a fraction up. She looked as if she too, was reminiscing their time together in the near-death situation back in space. It was strange. Lacus had not thought about those thoughts for a while now.

Lacus smiled weakly. "It hasn't even been a year, I suppose."

It was then did Cagalli answer her initial question. "Things will always be the same between us, Lacus. To friends, things always stay the same."

This, however did not make Lacus smile. "And to lovers? Will everything be the same for them, too?"

The songstress did not have to mention their names. Yzak and Kari. Dearka and Miriallia. No. Things will never be the same. Even if they wanted it to.

_**0 -- 0 -- 0 -- 0**_

Coffee had never tasted this bad.

Miriallia winced as she put the cup down on the table in front of her, nearly spilling a bit on the yellow napkin under it. She stifled a yawn, hoping not to offend Dearka. The Buster pilot had fetched her from the Women's RQ a few minutes after the sun had raised, and she begrudgingly complied with the invitation for coffee downtown. The problem now was that she could barely keep her eyes open.

Dearka, on the other hand, was looking at her with wide, lavender eyes. It was creepy that he was as awake as this. Aside from the rumpled shirt he had obviously slept in, and the untidy way his hair flowed to the left side of his face, he looked more alert than a watchdog. It was weird. The first day he came back from Orb, he had done nothing but sleep all day and pack all night with a vengeance even Miriallia could not understand.

"How have you been?" Dearka asked, unblinking eyes stared at her, his coffee forgotten in front of him.

Miriallia tried to stubbornly meet his gaze, but no one – she believed – could meet those purple pools without wavering. She dropped her gaze to her lap. "I've been packing. The dropping forms are passed. Everything's all right. I suppose… "

Dearka nodded absentmindedly. "Yeah. Packing and stuff. Me, too."

Miriallia waited for him to elaborate, but when he did not, she said, "How about you? How have things been with your father?"

Dearka gave a start, and for the first time that hour, he intently busied himself with his coffee. "He seemed well enough. A bit stressed and he looked tired, but he said everything up in the PLANTs is all right." With this, his face darkened. "Come to think of it, he did mention a lot about the PLANTs."

Miriallia felt her heart skip a beat at the mention of the place. She wanted to ask so many questions, to ask about the things they had to talk about back in Orb, but she could not bring herself to do so. She was too afraid of what Dearka had to say. And she did not trust herself to support whatever Dearka had decided upon after this.

She was surprised when the Buster pilot reached out and held her hand ever so gently. The deadpanned stare was no longer there, and his eyes gazed at her gently. "Do you remember the first time we ever met? You remind me of that time now, when you couldn't even look at me in the face without crying. Look at me, Milly. Please?"

A few seconds of hesitation, finally her yes found his. She nearly wanted to cry when she saw how pained his face looked at what he was about to say. Somehow she knew without him even have to say it. She just knew.

"I'm going back to the PLANTs, Milly."

For some weird reason, a week ago, she had prepared herself for this, planned out how she would act, what she would say, when Dearka said anything of this sort. All her planning, she did not know where they had gone. Right now, she was just at a loss for words. She looked away from him and gently snatched her hand back.

"Milly, don't be this way. If I would be able to stay with you forever, you know I would. But there are duties and responsibilities that I have left hanging after the war that I owe my father."

Those logical explanations sounded nothing more than just excuses to Miriallia. She shook her head. "Then go. If you really need to." She knew she was being selfish. She knew she was being childish. But what did Dearka expect her to say after telling her this?

Miriallia cursed to herself silently. She had not expected to grow this attached to him this fast. But perhaps she has had enough of goodbyes lately. She hated goodbyes…

Dearka sighed patiently, as if he knew what she was thinking. "This isn't goodbye, Miriallia. It's merely a see you later kind of thing."

Miriallia was not too sure about that. A goodbye was a goodbye. "How long?"

It was Dearka's turn to look away. "I'm not sure. A few weeks, months… ?"

She felt numb. She did not know how to take what he was saying, and so she decided to change the subject. "That girl, Shiho?" The name sounded so weird to her tongue. "Who is she?"

As if Dearka too felt relieved for the change of subject. "An escort."

"For who?"

"For Yzak. To make sure he didn't run off without his mother knowing it."

Miriallia frowned. She had always thought Ezaria Jule liked Kari, and here she was, sending a girl bodyguard for her son. "Why?"

Dearka looked uncomfortable again. "Things are happening in the PLANTs. Drastic changes not even Ezaria could control. Not even my father could control."

She did not know how to take that, either. If anything, it made her feel even more distant from the world Dearka was going back home to. Drastic changes. She wondered what they were. She was surprised when she found Dearka's hand on her wrist again. And the most unexpected words that came from his mouth left Miriallia almost reeling out of her seat.

"I want you to meet my father."

_**0--0--0--0**_

Scratching his forehead in annoyance, Athrun slammed the phone down and rested his chin on the back of his hand. It was no use. He had been searching by phone all over Orb for an apartment, a place to stay, for almost a week now but because everyone else was doing the same thing, the families and married couples had top priority over housing. He knew that he would eventually find accommodations, but he could not help but feel like he was running out of time. He had no one to blame but himself. He had been too lax, too involved with his life in Japan to even think ahead of the possibility that it would not last forever.

He felt a tap on the shoulder followed by something cold pressing against his cheek. When he looked up, he saw Kira looking down at him, smiling, a canned Coca Cola hovering over his face.

Athrun took the drink gratefully, then watched Kira sit beside him on the couch.

"Any luck?" his best friend asked as he gestured at the phone that seemed to be mocking him with its silence.

Athrun shook his head. "I'm on the waiting list. By the way they said it, it seems like it's a very, very long list though." Taking a sip of his drink, he leaned back and closed his eyes, frustrated. "I'm starting to wonder if fate is preventing me from moving to Orb."

There was a long silence before Kira spoke. "Dearka and I hung out a bit yesterday. He said… well, he said he and Yzak are going back to the PLANTs. Did he mention anything to you?"

Athrun's eyes popped open at the memory of Dearka nagging him for advice on what to do. The Buster pilot had been so genuinely confused on what to do, torn between his desire to be with Miriallia and his obligations left hanging with the military. Athrun had not been stingy with advice. The only problem was, Dearka did not seem to want to listen to it. He remembered a long time ago they had somewhat had the same conversation about this. Dearka had asked him before, about what he would do if he were called back up to the PLANTs. Athrun of course had answered truthfully; he would go back, no questions asked. Dearka seemed to want to hear something romantic, like "_Stay with Milly," _or_ "You don't have to go back,"_ or something of the like. But Athrun was a man of obligation. He could not simply go and rush into a romantic future without weighing the consequences that await him in it.

Athrun felt Kira watching him in the corner of his eye.

"If you're still looking for a place to stay," Kira started, suddenly taking an interest on the ceiling, "you can stay with me. My parents don't have that big a house, but it's always clean, and my mom's cooking is great." This was not the first time he had invited him…

Athrun looked over at him uncertainly. He remembered how he had used to spend sleepovers at Kira's place when they were kids in Copernicus. Athrun could still remember how Mrs. Yamato made great lasagna and garlic bread. He wondered if Kira had forgotten that he actually knew how his mother cooked great. He smiled at him ruefully then. "Wouldn't Lacus be staying with you?"

At the mention of that, Kira instantly turned pink. Athrun shook his head. They had been avoiding this conversation for far too long. Forgiving and forgetting was just not enough between friends…

"I remember that time when you brought Lacus back to me by Strike, even when you were told not to. You didn't know how very worried about her I was. But ever since then, after she met you, she couldn't stop thinking about you. And I was too busy to even be jealous of the interest she had gained within a few days of being with you, when all the while she had been engaged to me." Athrun laughed mirthlessly.

Kira tried to hide his face in his hand, his voice muffled in his palms. "Do you still love her?" he asked in a small voice. "I've always wondered, always wanted to know… "

Athrun looked over at him, taking a sip of his drink once more. "Do you still love Fllay?"

And there was a long, long silence. Athrun suddenly wondered if he had gone too far, until Kira answered.

"There were too many regrets… too many things that were left unsaid, undone… I had wanted to apologize. But I wasn't even given the chance for that. Do I love her? I _had. _Maybe I always will, but there are other things better than living in the past."

Athrun nodded. "Regrets. I know what you feel. After saying that, do you still have to ask me if I still love Lacus?"

And with that, Kira met his gaze. And he smiled, shyly, eyes sparkling as if a heavy burden was relieved from his chest.

Athrun nodded. "Take care of Lacus. And I promise I will take care of Cagalli." Draining his drink in one gulp, he let out a breath and stood up, then looked down at Kira who was still looking at him. "I'll try to look for more places to stay, and if I don't find one, I might jus take up your offer."

_**0--0-0--0**_

The soccer field was considerably empty when Yzak Jule arrived in A. U. He did not exactly have a certain reason to be there, but his room had started to seem too stuffy after too much packing. That, and he could not bear the fact that Shiho Hahnenfuss kept on standing under his room window like a stalker. It would have been better if he knew the reason why she was there in the first place, but since he had been avoiding her like the plague, he never got the chance to know. When he decided to go out for a walk, his legs, for some reason, took him here to the soccer field. This was where he first met Kari.

Kari… He still couldn't get her out of his head. She was like an itch on his back which he couldn't quite reach, a tight ball in the middle of his gut. He did not like it.

Sitting on the grass overlooking the soccer field, he was surprised when he felt someone standing a few paces away from him. He did not have to look in order to know who it was. She spoke in a deep, steady voice that made Yzak wince.

"Commander Jule," Shiho's voice rang through his ears.

Yzak whirled around, angry. "I am no commander! And how dare you sneak up on me!"

A startled look flashed across the lavender-eyed girl. The look was gone in a blink of an eye that Yzak had to wonder if it ever had been there. Shiho stood there, rod straight. "I was sent to escort you home, Commander. A direct order from representative Jule herself."

Yzak narrowed his eyes. A direct order? From his mother…?

Shiho smiled a secretive smile. Yzak could remember that smile well. It was back in ZAFT. He seldom did get to talk to this girl at all when he entered the military. He had seen her once or twice and had even been able to sit with her a few times during written exams. But that secretive smile, the ones she reserved when she knew something that he didn't, it was something no one could miss.

"What do you want from me?" Yzak asked silently, finally sweeping his eyes away from the girl, returning his gaze over the soccer field. He was surprised when he found her sitting next to him, tucking a long strand of loose brown locks behind her ear.

"I told you, Commander. I've come to escort you back home."

_Home… _It sounded like a vague, unfamiliar word. For some point in time, he had thought _here_ was his home. "And why you of all people?"

She smiled again, that annoying secretive smile.

He was about to snap at her when a very familiar flash of red-blonde hair appeared in the corner of his eye.

Kari, immaculately beautiful in a white summer dress and slippers, came struggling across the path around the soccer field with a bundle of books and folders in her arms. At the sight of her, Yzak found himself standing. He did not remember getting up on his feet, but the next second he was sprinting towards her, and the second after that, he was supporting the stack of books that was about to topple from Kari's arms.

Kari's emerald-green eyes blinked in wonder for the first time since the incident at Higashimokoto, she looked up at him and smiled.

Yzak nearly fainted at the sudden warm feeling spreading from his chest when he saw that. It felt like years since she had smiled for him. He wanted to throw the books between them and crush him to her, to embrace her. At the same time, he wanted to run away from her as fast as he could.

"Thank you," Kari said as she shifted her hold on the books, trying desperately to balance them. "I should have stuffed them all in a box or something instead of carrying them as it is…"

_Run_… Yzak thought to himself, but as usual, he was too stupid to do so. Getting a firm grip on the books, he heaved them over his arms and straightened up without looking at her. "Let me help you carry these… "

Kari blinked a few times again, looking at him curiously. After a moment of silence, she nodded at him. "Thank you. I was going to bring these to my locker. It's over by the – "

"I know where your locker is," he said before he could stop himself. Kari's eyes widened at him, an interested look passed her flawless face.

"Do we… do we know each other from somewhere?" she asked cautiously.

Yzak made every effort to avoid her eyes. "We… we share a class. Art of War… " Before he could continue, he saw from a distance Shiho looking over at them, hands calmly poised over her stomach, an unreadable expression on her face.

Yzak frowned. He did not know what his mother was up to, but for a weird reason, he did not like it.

"Shall we go?"


	44. Phase 44: Before the Parting

_**Second to the last chapter. I could have updated sooner, but my old laptop betrayed me… My hard drive crashed on me. Everything, my stories, my art, pictures… Everything was erased… Very frustrating, but I've finally gotten me a new laptop. =) But now I have to start from scratch… grrr…**_

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Yzak believed he had not done anything as stupid as what he was doing now. The sun was barely setting over the mountains, and here he was, crouched over the wire fence that separated the soccer field from the school like an idiot。

Looking over his shoulder to make sure he was alone, he started digging on the dry soil with his fingers. As he did so, his thoughts kept wandering back to the time when he had first met Kari at this very spot. He could not help but curse that fated day. He should really have written it off then, nipped it in the bud. He should have listened to his soldier instincts then. Maybe if he did, maybe if he did not give in to his emotions, maybe if he had been stronger then, if he had not been too caught off guard by the peace, maybe he could have saved himself the heartache he was experiencing now. Too many maybes… He hated the feeling of being unsure. He was Yzak Jule. He was _never _unsure.

Once he had finally dug a deep enough hole in the ground, he plunged his clean hand into his pocket and pulled out the only reminder he had of Kari; long locks of strawberry-blond hair he had kept ever since that day when Kian had unceremoniously cut Kari's long hair. Yzak stared down at the reminder in his hand, feeling it between his fingers, remembering the silkiness of it and feeling even worse than before. Anger catching him suddenly, he stuffed the locks of hair into the hole he had dug, and filled it with soil in a hurry. He was angry about so many things, angry that Kari did not even consider his feelings about this.

Remembering the letter in his pocket, the one that Kari had given him through Kian, he paused a moment, stopped his shoveling of soil into the hole, and retrieved the letter from his breast pocket. He looked down at it as if it had said something offending to him, in one swift move crumpled it into a tiny ball, then dropped it into the hole with the locks of hair.

It took him a few minutes to get the job done. When he was finally through, that was when he realized someone was standing behind him. He heard him before he saw him.

It was Kian.

"What do you want?" Yzak asked silently, brushing his hands on his shirt as he turned to face the guy.

Kian was staring at him intently. With the fading light that afternoon, his green eyes that reminded Yzak so much of Kari looked like it was glowing as the setting sun reflected against it. "I didn't know you were a sentimental guy."

Yzak narrowed his eyes at him. "You came all this way to be flippant with me?"

"If it were up to me, I wouldn't care less about you. But my sister has experienced enough already. Why can't you just leave her alone?"

Yzak looked away. He knew what Kian was talking about. It had to be that day when he had helped Kari carry her books to her locker then. "I'm trying. You don't know how much I am trying to forget about her, to leave her alone."

"Try harder. You're not trying hard enough."

Yzak nearly snarled at him, but he knew the guy was right. It was easy to say things like this when Kari was not around, but that was the point. She was always there, always appearing at the most unexpected places, unexpected times. But he, for all that was good and holy, did not believe he was obligated to explain this to Kian of all people.

"I'm leaving for space tomorrow, Kian. There's nothing you have to worry about because I'll be gone. Does that make you happy?"

Kian stared at him silently. Yzak could not believe he was having this conversation with him of all people. He competed with Kian stare for stare, blue eyes meeting green ones. Those eyes reminded him so much of Kari that it hurt to look away.

"Look," Kian said suddenly, something in those eyes softening. "To tell you honestly, I did not come here to argue with you."

Yzak smirked. Now he tells him. "Then why the heck did you?"

Kian looked uncomfortable. The emotion seemed as if it were unfamiliar to him; he looked like he was having a hard time. When he did not speak, Yzak rolled his eyes and was about to walk away. He had better things to do than wait for this guy make a fool of himself with foolish sentiments.

"I came to thank you," Kian suddenly blurted out haphazardly.

This made Yzak freeze in mid-step. He slowly turned to the red-haired boy and looked at him quizzically. "You came to thank me?" he asked dryly.

Kian looked at him with an unreadable expression on his face, opened his mouth as if to speak, then shook his head. "Forget it. Forget I said anything." He turned to leave. But before he did, he looked over his shoulder at Yzak and gave him a nod. "You know what, if we were born in a different era, maybe – just maybe – we could have been friends. Take care of yourself." And he walked away in a hurry, as if he couldn't wait to get away from the Duel Pilot.

Yzak followed him with his eyes until he disappeared out of sight behind the school. Sighing in relief that he had finally left, he turned back on the grave he had created, frowned. It was over. It was time to wake up from the dream he'd had about loving a girl, and receiving love in return.

That was it, a dream. It could not be anything more. It would be better to think it as that…

Tearing his eyes from the grave, he walked towards the orphanage. There were things left unfinished that he had to tie up before he left.

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That day, Murrue had come over from Orb by private plane to help them with the packing. Miriallia had observed she had gotten thinner, but there was a smile on her face when she greeted them after disembarking the plane. Her hair, longer than Miriallia would have liked, was tied back in a loose, disheveled bun, and dark glasses perched on her nose hid her eyes. She probably hadn't had enough sleep the previous night.

"How's it going?" Murrue asked cheerfully as Cagalli, Miriallia, Lacus and Kira crowded around her.

"Everything's contained in boxes. All we need is to lug them all out of the dorms. We rented a van." Kira answered as he jerked his thumb to the van waiting to bring them back to the R.Q.

Murrue looked at the Freedom Pilot and winced. "You need a haircut."

Kira shrugged. "I like it this way."

Murrue snorted. "Your head looks like a mop. When you get home, get a haircut." Kira was about to shake his mop when Murrue turned to Cagalli. "Kisaka wanted me to hand you these." She produced a thick stack of envelopes from her tote bag.

Cagalli looked at the envelopes suspiciously. "Is it work?"

Murrue shrugged. "Nope. They are from the children residing in the orphanage in Orb. Apparently, they seem to know that their princess is coming home to them and wanted to wish you well." She pulled a larger envelope from her bag, and laid it on top of the thick stack of letters. "This, on the other hand, _is _work. It's a request from the representing houses for a press conference regarding the Import and Export of goods between the PLANTs and Orb."

Cagalli sighed. "Can't they at least wait until I get there before making me read this?"

"No," Murrue said simply.

"Are there any news from the PLANTs?" Lacus asked.

"Now that you mentioned it, I almost forgot." Murrue looked back at the plane behind them. "Someone is here with me to help with the relocation."

Miriallia didn't know but she thought Murrue's eyes lingered on her face a second too long at that moment. At that moment, she instantly knew why.

She had never seen even the slightest shadow of the man, but from the moment she had laid eyes on him, there was no mistaken that the person who had just disembarked from the private plane, short blond hair and skin as dark – or maybe darker – than his son, was none other than Tad Elthman. For a brief moment, she felt herself heat up. It was like looking at Dearka's future self. And in that brief moment, she liked what she saw.

That brief moment, however, lasted for just a few seconds. After that she felt like an orange had been shoved down her throat. She had dreamed and daydreamed about this day when she would be able to introduce herself to this man. But never in her wildest imaginations did she wish to introduce herself without Dearka there.

_Where the heck is Dearka?_

But before she could react even more, Athrun who was supposed to be waiting in the van, had materialized out of nowhere and had rushed to meet with the tall vision of influence who was looking at him warmly.

Athrun came to an abrupt halt a couple of feet away from Tad Elthman and awkwardly – as if having forgotten how to do it – gave the salute Miriallia had seen Yzak do with his mother once before in Orb during the Memorial of Honors.

For a whole minute, Tad Elthman looked at the serious-looking Athrun with an unreadable expression, then with a nod gently placed a hand on his head, like how a father would have done to a son.

"You did well, Athrun. You did well." Tad Elthman smiled painfully at Athrun and ruffled his hair lightly. "I would like to offer my sincerest condolences on your father's demise. I am truly very sorry about the turn of events that you at such a young age would have to go through."

Athrun's eyes, which had been wide with shock the moment Dearka's father had placed his hand on his head, looked down sadly at the consoling words he had to offer. "Thank you, Representative Elthman."

The hand that rested on his head shifted to his shoulder, gripping him firmly. "If there is anything you need, anything that I could possibly do for you, never hesitate to tell me." And with that, he let go of Athrun and started towards the group. Athrun stood there dumbly, eyes still cast down.

Miriallia felt her heart jump twice in her chest as the man started to approach them. She felt like running away, scared of how this confrontation was going to turn out. But she felt Cagalli rest a hand on her arm, and smiled at her encouragingly. She nodded back, but she still felt like running away. She froze when Tad Elthman stopped right in front of her and Cagalli.

"Cagalli Yula Attha, Princess of Orb Emirates. I have always wanted to meet you in person. My name is – "

"I know who you are without further introduction, Representative Elthman. And in this meeting, I assure you, the pleasure is all mine." Cagalli extended a hand, and Tad Elthman shook it firmly. "I was hoping you would have stayed in Orb and waited. All that's left to do here is evacuate the residential quarters."

Representative Elthman shook his head. "I had wanted to see with my own eyes, how your accommodations have been for the past months after the cease fire. I am not disappointed with what I have seen so far."

Cagalli nodded. "There couldn't have been a better place to go. They have been very nice to us here. It made me wonder a few times if this is how it would have gone, had the war not started."

Tad Elthman did not say anything, but there was something in his eyes that somehow made his hard features look gentler. Could it be regret? Miriallia swallowed hard when those eyes, so much like Dearka's eyes, looked at her directly.

She felt her heart jump to her throat and opened her mouth to speak, but stopped when Tad Elthman looked away indifferently and started to walk towards Murrue.

Miriallia felt a weird sensation of pain stab her chest at that moment. She lowered her eyes to the ground and blinked back the tears that threatened to flow. She did not know why she felt like crying. She had said to herself many times that there was a big chance of rejection from this person if they ever did meet. Rejection was one thing. Her existence having been denied of recognition was another. Didn't Dearka tell his father about her at all?

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By the time Yzak reached the orphanage, he had already worked up a speech to deliver. Unlike most people, who made this thing look like it was a piece of cake, he was naturally born with hardly a speck of sincerity when it came to apologizing. But then, who in this world would be able to come up with a great speech when you go apologizing to someone for killing their mother?

He did not even know why he felt obligated to apologize to Fallon. It was a war. It had been his job in the first place. It was not as if he was doing it out of spite.

Of course he had told this to himself for about a million times already, but it was an unfamiliar feeling – was this guilt? – that had been making his stomach ache, and he did not like it hurting this way. He had to apologize. It was now or never.

Preparing himself, he turned the alley leading to the orphanage. He blinked in surprise when he saw a little girl sitting on the stairs, playing with a doll. She looked awfully familiar to him. The moment she looked up, he instantly remembered. She was the girl Kira and Lacus had taken to Kitami Family Land, the one who had given him money, thinking he needed it.

"Hello!" she greeted when she saw him. "Have you seen Big Brother Kira? Or maybe Princess Lacus?"

Yzak raised an eyebrow at her. "Who?"

The girl's face fell. "Oh never mind. I knew they wouldn't be coming today. They said they were busy with packing. Are they moving somewhere? I wonder if I can come, too."

Yzak looked at her blankly. Kira and Lacus, hadn't they told this child they were going back to Orb? "What's your name?"

The girl looked up at Yzak questioningly. "I'm not telling you unless you tell me yours."

Yzak frowned. Cautious kid. "My name's Yzak Jule. I'm a, uh, a friend of Kira and Lacus'."

The girl beamed up at him with a toothy smile. "My name is Eiko. Did you know that Eiko is the Japanese word for _glory_?" She frowned. "I read it at a book called a Japanese-english d-dicshunar-ry…"

Yzak kneeled down in front of her. "You must be a smart girl, reading a dictionary at your age."

Eiko looked at him again, this time more suspiciously. "Big brother Kira told me to be wary of people who praise me, he said that they'd probably want something in return."

Yzak felt a muscle in his left cheek twitch in irritation. Trust Kira to teach a child to doubt. "He's not lying when he told you that. Anyway, go back inside and while you're at it, can you check if Fallon is inside?"

Eiko shook her hear. "Fallon isn't here. She left a few hours ago with the guy who smiles too much."

Yzak frowned. He never did like Yalin. He got to his feet. "I see. What time do you thing she'll be back?"

Eiko suddenly pointed over his shoulder. "Right now!"

Yzak did a double turn and found himself staring at green, ever so familiar eyes. Fallon was looking at him as if she had never seen him before, and it seems like she was not liking what she was seeing. Behind her was Yalin, feeling obviously unsure of what to do.

"What do you want?" Fallon whispered weakly, placing a hand on her temple.

Yzak was not expecting her to be this calm. He had actually expected an outburst. He was actually preparing himself for a few scratches from her as well. But there she was, probably in the calmest state he had ever seen him.

"I came to say I'm sorry…" Yzak said uncertainly. He felt his hands sweating, and he stuffed them in his pocket.

Fallon shook her head tiredly. "I don't want to talk about it anymore. In reality I don't even know how to take this." She turned to Yalin. "I have to go. Thank you for your help."

Yalin opened his mouth as if to speak, but never got the chance when Fallon rushed away from him, heading for the orphanage.

"Welcome home!" Eiko greeted her.

Fallon ignored her and, giving one more hurt glace at Yzak, disappeared through the door of the building. Eiko, who seemed too young to recognize a dismissal, jumped after her.

It was Yzak's turn to now know what to do. He looked at Yalin then at the door, then at Yalin again.

Yalin drew in a breath and immediately exhaled as if in frustration. "I'm sorry about that. She's very upset right now."

Yzak frowned. He did not know why Yalin was speaking for Fallon at all, but he decided that before he left Japan, he at least wanted to find out what was happening with the daughter of the Kari he never knew. "Did something happen?"

Yalin scratched his head. "I… took her to Mrs. Takano earlier. I figured that her grandmother would have wanted to see her… "

Yzak felt his mouth go dry. "And?"

Yalin bit his lip. "She didn't want her. And that was that."

And that was when someone picked up the world and started spinning it. Yzak did not know where the anger bubbled up from, but he felt as if he had never been this mad since Mrs. Takano kidnapped Kari and erased her memories of him. But he felt as if the guidance councilor was going too far. His feet appeared to have moved on their own, and the next time he looked, he found himself standing in front of Kari's house, knocking hard on the door.

Much to his annoyance, Kian was the one who answered the door.

"Yes?" he drawled boredly.

"Get your mother out here! Now!" Yzak screamed.

Kian's eyes widened, looked over his shoulder and sighed. "So you heard about what happened with that girl?"

"She's her grand daughter! How can she reject her like that? Bring her out here!"

"Yalin what's all this racket? I – oh it's you." Mrs. Takano came out from the kitchen in a hurry. She frowned when she saw Yzak standing at the door. Shoving her son away, she stepped out of the living room, closed the door behind her and crossed her arms over her stomach. "Are you here again for my daughter?"

"I came here for Fallon."

"As always, sticking your nose into other people's businesses. Why can't you keep away from us?"

"Trust me, after this you will never see me again," Yzak hissed. "All I wanted to ask you was why you turned away your own daughter before, and now your grand daughter."

"That is something I don't feel obliged to answer, Yzak Jule. Don't think you can understand, because you can't. Please leave."

"What did that girl ever do to you? She didn't do anything wrong. You're the only family she's got!"

"If I take her in, that will bring too many complications in this family. And we already have too much of that, thanks to you. That girl is not my granddaughter. I don't want to have anything to do with her. You are not in the position to tell me what to do. I hope you know that."

Yzak felt his blood pressure rising dangerously. He hadn't thought he would be able to meet anyone of human blood to be this cold, even in the war. "I hope you have a nice life with your children. I'm looking forward to their freedom when you finally croak." And with that, he turned to leave, Mrs. Takano saying something rude to him which he couldn't quite make out.

He was so mad. He stalked away in a hurry, his head spinning. He was so mad, he did not even realize someone was standing by the corner and he nearly ran her over. Things were turning out to be the worse for him. It was Kari.

She brushed back her hair behind her ear. "It's you."

Yzak looked down at her, his eyes meeting hers, and for some unexplained reason, he felt all the anger melt away from him. He took a deep breath. "I wasn't looking. I'm sorry."

She smiled her small, secretive smile. It drove him crazy. "You're in a hurry?"

"I – uh, yeah. I have… stuff to do," he said lamely.

"I didn't see you at school today. Where are you going in such a rush?"

Yzak couldn't take his eyes off her. She looked a bit tired, but still very very beautiful. "I'm going away… "

Kari looked a bit shocked. "You are? But the semester's almost over. Couldn't you wait until then? I was hoping to bump into you again and maybe have a cup of coffee?"

At that moment, Kari's words back in Higashimokoto before she lost her memories rang inside Yzak's head like a gong.

_"Because even if I do forget about who I am, even if I get my memories erased, I have no doubt that I will just fall in love with you all over again… "_

Yzak bit his lip painfully, hard enough to draw blood. And at that second, he just couldn't help it. With a swift move, he pulled her to him in a tight embrace, burying his face into her neck, breathing her scent for probably the last time. "Goodbye, Kari." And with that, he broke away from the embrace and ran like mad, as far away from her as possible.

He did not want her to see him crying, because he knew she wouldn't understand.

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**_ONE MORE CHAPTER TO GOOOOO!!!_**

**_Wonder how many years it'll take me to post them up?_**


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